Pisces and No Passion?

Will a Pisces man be satisfied with a "comfortable" relationship where the physical part is not central to the relationship but where they share things in common?

To my knowledge its when they dont like you they are less physical.

The reason I ask is that I had a long distance, online relationship with a Pisces man and he chose to drop me and hook up with a woman who lives nearer to him with whom he feels "comfortable and loving" yet the physical part is rather ho-hum. Do you think comfortable might feel better to someone who is a widower, even if they are very sexually oriented?

Perhaps, maybe he'd like female companionship more readily available. He is also a widower so im guessing he's getting his feet wet a bit.

Thanks Lady_M. You sound pretty wise. Are you familiar with the Pisces man?

Are you really 93 years old, or -93 years old, meaning you are "younger" than dirt?

It would be nice to hear from a Pisces man as well, or any men actually. And, P-Angel seems very in tune with the Pisces psyche.

Your Welcome.
phew, Im pretty young 😛

Im dating a pisces guy at the moment and several good friends.

Good Luck with your guy.
I dont think he wants to be or should be rushed in the love department; so im sre he's basing his decisions on it.

"My guy" is rushing himself! He already plans on living with this woman. I think it's the wrong move for him. It's less than a year since his wife died, and he started corresponding with this lady within a few months of his wife's death. I actually care about him as a friend too, and have known him (online) for several years. Although I need to move on and meet someone in real life.

If I had been married to the same person for a really long time and they died, I think I'd want to be single for a while, travel, and meet new people.

You're dating a Pices guy and some other people too? How do all of you ladies meet these guys? I think I'd like to meet another Pisces, if they're as sexy as this guy. My last boyfriend was a Taurus and we butted heads. I'm a Cancer with a Taurus moon and Leo rising.

Oh my, Im sorry I post that wrong.
I meant I have other good pisces guy friends.
Trust me, I rarely meet good dateable guys.

Wow, your 'guy" is moving too fast...but I guess he has to figure things out on his own.

btw, Ive known my pisces guy for a while...this is not a random guy.

'.. DC you are on the road to "nirvana".. 😉'

hehe, perhaps...

Its true Arch, pisces are known to be great motivational speakers.

"I don't think that is unusual for a Piscean man. Especially if he's young. The heart tends to rule the head with an iron grip."

He's not young. He's late 50s. I'm going by what he told me, but he said he chose this woman not because of what he wanted but because of what he needed.

Do Pisces men HAVE TO have a relationship in their lives to feel safe and complete?

By the way, I'm new here. How do you get those little photos or images by your name?

You can add a photo by going to the 'user' menu a the top of the page.
Click 'add/edit photos'
Browse your pics, choose what you like.
title, description.
check the box where it says something to the effect of 'primary pic'
and click add.

voila! ...you'll have your very own avatar.

I agree with DC (a lovely pisces man).

I think pisces men love 'romance' period. Its true they seem to lack confidence, in regards to the opposite sex, even if they are great men. They really enjoy romance in itself, sometimes I think more than the actual partner (whole other story). 😛

But I do think your guy friend is seeking to recreate what he had before (although he is doing the wrong thing, in our opinions). Its what he feels he needs at the moment. H chooses to fill the void with a comfortable relationship.

""he chose this woman not because of what he wanted but because of what he needed."

Don't most do that? "

Not men...

Thanks for all of your comments. I think what you say makes total sense.

For me personally, and this could be why I'm still single after all these years, if I settled for a comfortable relationship where passion was missing, I would constantly be sitting on the fence about whether I was doing the right thing.

In fact, I lived with a man for four years where that was the case. I was quite a bit younger then though. I'm mid-50s now. I was in my late 30s then. He had so many good qualities, was a Capricorn, was very bright, etc. But there was NO passion and no sexual attraction on my part, even though we were affectionate with each other. I finally worked up the courage to leave.

One normally doesn't think of Cancer women as being sex fiends, but sexual attraction MUST be a part of my relationships or I would feel sort of lifeless.

"In the hierarchy of mankind... needs should be met before one takes up the task of "wants" and then "dreams" then "recognition" and then I think "philanthropy" etc...

It is a hypotheitcal pyramid of human psychology..; qte wellknown... I have forgotten the name."

It's Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs pyramid.

I would say we need human companionship. However, do we "need" a significant other?

I think another factor for my friend is the fact that, outside of his children and family, he basically has no social life or friends. His entire life was devoted to his wife and family. With no friends, her death would leave a tremendous void.

"One normally doesn't think of Cancer women as being sex fiends, but sexual attraction MUST be a part of my relationships or I would feel sort of lifeless."

you have yet to visit the cancer board...

See they NEED romance/love...

We have never met physically, although we have talked on the phone and written to each other a great deal. We were members of the same political discussion group. Although initially we were never that close, I had observed his political comments for a few years and always was somewhat intrigued by him, despite what I saw as some very different political orientations. Over time, we seemed to gradually come together more though or start to agree on more politically.

I was aware that his wife had passed away last year, but never was close enough to offer my condolences. I just was aware of it.

Early this year, I posted a photo of myself in my profile and he saw it. He commented on the fact that I was a very attractive lady, and then followed it up with another comment that he thought I was sexy. I saw his photo and thought he was sexy too, so I pursued him. Without going into details, we became very friendly after that point until he revealed that he had found someone else (which was quite a shock for me). There's much more to this story, but that's the basic outline.

Are you sure there is someone else then?

Also, he has been romantically involved with this woman for several months, and he and I have continued to correspond.

"Are you sure there is someone else then?"


Yes.

He wants to maintain a friendship with me, but I still feel a strong romantic attraction to him, if you can feel that without meeting someone. But...the imagination is VERY POWERFUL.

"What was his view of you and him? friends? online romance?"


While we were "involved," he viewed it as an online romance, as did I.

Are you guys all just really into astrology? Why would Sag people hang out on a Pisces forum? Have you become friends with each other?

"hmmmm,

why were you shocked? has he said something in regard to having a future togather, wht abt the passion part in your initial post.

no prying, i am a sag, I cant see depth if not stated."


He gave me no indication that he was seeing or writing to anyone else, although naive me, I should have asked. I will from now on, that's for sure!! He was TOTALLY INTO me. I'm not exaggerating. Our romance was very brief but it was VERY intense.

Because of some things I said, I think he came to realize that he might not be able to meet my needs. I had a couple of conditions before I would be willing to have a real relationship with him. Plus, I live quite far from him. It was not very practical.

Most hold online romances to past the time until they can find a more permanent and readily accessible person...


that could've been the case.

"It was not very practical."


But I miss the relationship very much.

I just have been reluctant to put myself out there in real life because I got hurt very badly by my relationship with the Taurus man I spoke about. It's been years since I have been in a relationship. I got some counseling because I didn't want to keep repeating the same pattern in my relationships with men, but I ended up doing the very same thing with this online guy!!!

"Most hold online romances to past the time until they can find a more permanent and readily accessible person...

that could've been the case."

"In this case, unless you are willing to give up your conditions and practicability, wouldn't you say he made a good decision so both of you can move on?"


Possibly, but like I said, he was very into me. He actually came on very strong, at one point telling me he loved me. He also was willing to meet one of my conditions and we discussed him moving out to where I live. The other condition I think hurt his feelings. I won't discuss what that was, but almost anyone would set that condition unless they were truly desperate.

And, he very much wants to continue having a friendship with me.

I'm sorry if this all doesn't make sense.

"I think after that "romantic part" in your virtual relation, you are entitled to atleast an honest explaination to why he did wht he did"

He has explained it pretty well, not in detail, but... This is when he told me that he saw her as comfortable and a more realistic match for him.


"And what was that may I ask? Sorry that I'm slow..."

I tend to go for men who are unable to commit or give me what I want and they reject me for other women.

This all goes back to lack of confidence.

I guess he feels you can get and deserve more than he can offer.

btw, Pisces men have their feelings hurt pretty easily.

nice pic calixte.

Pisces usually dont give an explanation at all...and they plan to cut off ties long before they actually let you know. Never really telling you why or giving you a chance to explain or fix the issue.

pussies!

"This all goes back to lack of confidence.

I guess he feels you can get and deserve more than he can offer."

Yes, I believe this is true.


"btw, Pisces men have their feelings hurt pretty easily."

Everything I have read about Pisces men indicates this.

I can recall only one other Pisces man that I dated (many moons ago!) and he also was quite sensitive.

pardon my bluntness.

I tend to heart pisces mens feelings as you can see 😛

"I think pisces men cant be hard and harsh when ending a phase or love interest.. they dont say their real reasons out straight. perhaps he was not willing to comply to conditions and after well-thought-out-process wanted to end it.

by the way, personally I dont believe in excuses... 'where there is a will there is a way'. (I cant think otherwise)...

....
wht do u plan to do, stay friends with him?"


He admitted he did some soul-searching before making his decision.

Regarding your second paragraph, he apparently doesn't think it's worth it to try to pursue a relationship with me, as even if he did comply with my conditions, there is no guarantee it would work out.


Regarding the friendship, at this point, I have told him I don't think I can maintain a friendship with him when I still feel connected to him in a romantic way. I'm having a hard time giving up the fantasy. He told me he still fantasizes about me too.

If he continues to keep in touch with me, though, I may just offer him some unsolicited advice about what I view as a mistake on his part to settle down into another cozy and comfortable situation without really exploring other options. Of course, I would try to do it in as nice a way as possible.🙂

"So this other condition that hurt his feelings I would guess he cannot fulfill and you cannot forsake. If that's the case, then this whole situation makes perfect sense to me. And I agree with LadyM on the lack of confidence."

He could fulfill it, but it would be difficult, I admit. No, I am not willing to forsake it. You wouldn't either, believe me!


"My cancer good friend told me she enjoys the conquest of men who didn't show their desire for her initially. Not sure whether this is related. But I'd think NOT because I see her quality as a good quality (very brave). I'm curious to learn what would contribute to the pattern of going for men who are not available. I have a pattern of going for the two opposite end of the spectrum."

It may be bravery on her part to keep going when things don't look good. For me, I think it's more a trying to satisfy a painful issue from childhood. We often are attracted to people similar to our parents and we reenact the same scenarios.

"nice pic calixte."

Thanks. I don't know if you can tell, but it's a moon sliver.

"pardon my bluntness.

I tend to heart pisces mens feelings as you can see"


What sign are you? Did you say?

I tend to be blunt too, and I have no Sag in my chart. Must be that Leo rising and Mercury in Leo.

Im an aqua.


Is the request anything that could hurt him?

"Im an aqua.

Is the request anything that could hurt him?"

No, it would not hurt him. It would help him. It would, however, set him back financially. HINT: Think of a physical issue that would have a major impact on kissing and smiling. Someone who this would not bother would probably not care about kissing that much or doesn't care about appearances.

".. afterwards, smoke a cigarette and wish him best for his "realistic plans"
"

THAT was soooo SAG!

He doesnt want to get his teeth fixed?
clef palet?

hmmm, you raising the issue of something that he needs to change about himself would definitely drop his already low esteem.

sagigoat...your qoutes always look unfamiliar to me.
I swear I read every line in this thread too.

"that is a blessing.. having no sag.. honestly, I would be sooooooooooo tempted to appear surprisingly at his place, take him by the collar, push him on the bed and to live through the fantasy he created for you virtually.

.... afterwards, smoke a cigarette and wish him best for his "realistic plans""

LOL. That is so funny! Believe me, I would love to live out our fantasy at least once, and have thought about ways we could do that. I haven't gotten as "direct" as you though! LOL I do know his address... 🙂

However, giving up smoking was one of my conditions, one which he said he would agree to, but as a former smoker myself, I know that would be a toughie. The other condition had to do with a physical issue that I hinted to above.

"He doesnt want to get his teeth fixed?
clef palet?"

Yeah, it's his teeth. He needs some major dental work and hasn't had the funds or the inclination I guess. Weird. I have nice but not perfect teeth by any means, but I would go into major hock to get them fixed if I had a problem. I HAVE gone into major hock to do it.

oh sorry Sagi. Hope everything gets better.



Calixte:
That is definitely an ego bruiser.