Sex (Page 2)

"Please don't start with that double standard $ h!t I despise men who think it is okay for them to screw who they want but when a woman does the same...she is a slut."

Double standart? Who you think AM I? A man who has 2431932497053702375027543 sexual intercourses? I stay on my ground lady and speak from here! Hello Cancerlady! Can you see me? (waving)

" Besides a slut is actually one who is promiscuous but DOES NOT get paid...the Whore or prosititute gets paid."

Thanks for correction. Always welcomed.

" Ummm...you are right, I'm not sure how my P-man problems are related to this. "

It was good when you had pleasure, but it was bad when had to pay for it. I'm sure you used alot of your thoughtfulness and discermination of your mind when you had your ACCIDENT or UNPLANNED result. LMAO! If it makes sense and fits to shoes ya know...

And for the rest.

Girl. Go back 10 000 years when people still lived in jungle. Men was creature on great demand. Because they either were killing each other or being killed by wild animals. Now, how could population grow with so few number of men? Evolution made men more productive than women. Even in that time men had houndred of kids. Every male had sexual intercourse with every woman in their clan. That is our nature. But look today. We rarely have more than 4 kids for every male. That is about 100 less than before. But our nature hasn't changed yet. We still productive as much as were before. We always lived in an order because otherwise would be our end. What you see today is the result of this thorought process.

Ha Ha Ha

Haffo...this one's for you!

http://www.smileycentral.com/?partner=ZSzeb008_ZSYYYYYYYYUS' target='_blank'>

AND THIS

http://www.smileycentral.com/?partner=ZSzeb008_ZSYYYYYYYYUS' target='_blank'>

GIRLS GONE WILD!

" I have NO idea what you are saying...can you reword this?"

Not important.

LOL CL. Altought, even their real ones doesn't make much difference for me.

" Ummm...you are right, I'm not sure how my P-man problems are related to this. "

It was good when you had pleasure, but it was bad when had to pay for it. I'm sure you used alot of your thoughtfulness and discermination of your mind when you had your ACCIDENT or UNPLANNED result. LMAO! If it makes sense and fits to shoes ya know...

Actually it was better when we didn't have the meaningful "relationship" because as soon as we did...I got comfortable and was like oh...I guess it will be okay if we do it w/o the condom this time! WRONG! That was more irresponsibility than anything. Besides we are talking about one night stands right? We never had that so I still don't see how it is relevant to this particular discussion. This happens to married couples who have been monogamous for years!

Girl. Go back 10 000 years when people still lived in jungle. Men was creature on great demand. Because they either were killing each other or being killed by wild animals.

ACTUALLY women have and probably always will be in more demand BECAUSE we cannot produce all our lives. Think about it...If you have millions of men with THOUSANDS of sperm you can pick and choose whom you please right? So we choose the most virile man...the strongest...the one who looks like he will be the best provider. This was true then and is still now. People have less kids now because the world is a lot more populated than it was then and the urges to reproduce have slowly dwindled due to a lesser need for more people.

Listen I have to go home now, but I would love to continue this discussion tommorow.

Have a great nite!

Cancerlady

Good night Cancerlady. You know that you are great. You don't need words for that. Good night.

We have alot of double standards here in america where guys can cheat,sleep with countless women and it's all good but when a woman does it shes a slut so thats where that one came from.It depends on that particular person and thier reasons being maybe thier too busy with thier job to look for an actual relationship,etc so will be involved with one night stands.It's not really wrong it's just a different point of view towards sex without all the baggage as well so it's mutable in most of those cases.However im a prude so I have to be in a relationship or a friend w/ benifits sex so I know the guys not going to run his mouth afterwards,trust and health concerns is the reasons for me not to be with complete strangers.Even with condoms and other contraceptives some stds can still get through those.

Haffo, Dude, It's 2005 man. Through reading your posts on this topic it's no suprise to me that you are a virgin and may stay a virgin for a long time to come. Dude, you need to loosen up a little.

This thing where a woman is classed a slut if she's sexually liberated went out in the dark ages. Men have been sluts for generations but as soon as women start doing it, it's all taboo. In modern times men and women are classed as equals and over the last 40 years the boundaries of what is acceptable in society have broadened thus allowing people to be much more open about their sexuality.

Sure some people face moral or religous issues when it comes to having sex and that's totally up to them but there is always another side to that coin and that's not to say just because you have a one night stand you don't have morals either. Haven't you ever met or even just seen a girl on the street or in a club and thought "dang, I gotta have myself some of that".

Are you sure you're a pisces? Infact, are you sure you're a male?

You don't drink , do you?

BJ:

I understand that you want to act fair. But human made rules doesn't change nature of human race. Just because women want to be free that doesn't give them right to act disrespectfully or irresponsibly toward human race. Women and men in sex matters arent equal and will never be. Not because men want to limit women rights but because the function given to women isn't that worthless. Women is baby carrier. Look at people who make abortion. They are killing another human being. Who does that? WOMEN DOES!!!! Not men!!! Even if men want to make abortion and women wont, then women desicion is valid! Is that equal? Do you see where it's coming from? Law? Nature? Do you know why? Because that baby is in women body!! Speaking about one night stand. Personally I find that idea disgusting and not just for women but also for men. Imagine that you marry to or love a women and one day you find out that she was in sexual intercourse 100 times before, had 5 abortions and took blowjob from 3/5 men she met. THIS IS DISGUSTING AND DISHONORABLE TO HUMAN RACE!!! How can you accpet the fact that the women who you live with you has let her fuck dozen of times and now you want to have a baby from the same place. Do you find that clean for yourself? Personally for me, this kind of situation doesn't make any diffrence if she let herself fuck 100 time before me or after me. It's same for me.

Haffo wrote;
Imagine that you marry to or love a women and one day you find out that she was in sexual intercourse 100 times before, had 5 abortions and took blowjob from 3/5 men she met. THIS IS DISGUSTING AND DISHONORABLE TO HUMAN RACE!!!

Haffo, the woman you describe here is known to the human race as a skanky hoe. Most of us would pick this up before we married her. There are two (very far apart) extremes to this subject and I live around the middle somewhere. I myself have been quite adventurous in following my urges without leaving my morals in the gutter. I've always been very responsible when it comes to protection and I gotta tell ya I've had a lot of fun.

You only live once Haffo, so why not experience as much as you can. Especially while you're young, you don't want to start getting curious after 10 years of marriage.

It's your life dude and you can take the moral high ground if you want but it ain't much fun up there.

It's aint fun when it's disgusting....

"Most of us would pick this up before we married her."

How?

However BJ, I must admit you have the point.

Think of the prior to marriage sex as pratice of course with protection so it won't be as disgusting as it could be.If stuff starts turning green and falling off it's only then that there's a problem.

I think about women who taking head is an extremly disgusting person.

oh,giving head yeah,thats gross.ssssshh any dudes on that one,your all deprived on that one at least with one female.Deal with it I don't want to read about it.

Freebird and siezetheday I agree with how you both feel, without experience the tool is as they say "not such a good thing". Now on the other hand there are many who are not as blessed in that area that are something to remember indeed.

As they say "its not the meat it's the motion, that makes your mama wanna rock" as the lyrics say in this oldie but goodie!

Oh yes hello Freebird, Cancerlady, seizetheday, cj7, Alana and Haffo. It's good to be back!

TW2

HI TW2, and welcome back!

Haffo,

I would've sat here and written a long post about history, women's lib, and sexual freedom- but that overall seems like a waste of valuable time.

Rather- I'll ask, as you decide who's a whore and who isn't- how much time are taking to get to know a person? a woman?

You said you initially began this post to "understand" behaviors, however- the best understanding comes from NOT judging- by NOT making assumptions about a woman's moral standards--and by NOT categorizing her actions as deplorable.

For example: If you meet someone, and they're already making decisions about you because you're a Pisces- then what have they learned about YOU?

Anyway,
To "understand" means to listen. Your idea of ethics and moral standards may be different from mine- but are you truly understanding me if you are discounting my thoughts and ideas because of our differences? You said earlier, that I gave you the answer you wanted to hear- however how are you "understanding" when you ask a question- and then put constraints on the "type" of answer you get back?

I'm certaintly not trying insult you when I say- time and experience are the best teachers. My perspective definitely changed upon become intimate and comfortable with a boyfriend. Love- Sex- Companionship doesn't come down to numbers-- who/or how many-- what you have and haven't done/ OR what another person has done with their life BEFOE YOU essentially does not matter if you like the individual for who they are NOW. As you get older, you'll find that you'll meet more and more people who'll have a wide range of experiences (some of which you MAY find disgusting). This does not mean that these experiences makes them a bad person (or worthy of harsh judgements from you) .. rather their experiences changed them, made them stronger- perhaps even a better person.

I'm definitely a slut then because do you know how many men I have JUST let give me head w/out intercourse? At least five and it felt empowering to me and I LOVE IT!!

I still think Haffo needs to get him some...I bet he won't be talking all that "disgusting" crap when he gets a taste! LOL

Also, Haffo I believe your cultural background plays a huge part in how strongly you feel about women having casual sex therefore it is understandable. Yeah you said that you don't like when men do it, but your judgements about women are MUCH harsher.

Also like BJ says...keep your own morals, but lighten up on the rest of us! Variety is the spice of life and if everyone thought like you NOONE would EVER do it...There would be no children because everyone would be so worried about whether this woman is morally deplorable barring being a virgin...and BELIEVE you me I have known virgins to catch sexually transmitted diseases by oral sex so virginity is ALSO relative.

Besides...in these times you were talking about earlier...There wasn't the institution of marriage. Actually that didn't come about (correct me if I'm wrong) until "Christianity". People did mate for life, but they didn't have the restraints of the "rules" for behavior therefore you can't tell me you think people didn't sleep around!

CL

I have a male friend who was a virgin until he was 27. Never kissed a girl or anything. When he finally had his cherry popped- he wanted to "try" everything even experiences with other men.

Go figure.

BTW- I posted message 69 on this topic!!! YaY ME!

" Rather- I'll ask, as you decide who's a whore and who isn't- how much time are taking to get to know a person? a woman?"

I cant know if a woman had any sexual intercourses with man before unless she admits it. I know, this fact has share in my current situation.

"You said you initially began this post to "understand" behaviors, however- the best understanding comes from NOT judging- by NOT making assumptions about a woman's moral standards--and by NOT categorizing her actions as deplorable.

For example: If you meet someone, and they're already making decisions about you because you're a Pisces- then what have they learned about YOU?"

Yes, nothing.

" Anyway,
To "understand" means to listen. Your idea of ethics and moral standards may be different from mine- but are you truly understanding me if you are discounting my thoughts and ideas because of our differences? You said earlier, that I gave you the answer you wanted to hear- however how are you "understanding" when you ask a question- and then put constraints on the "type" of answer you get back?"

You used "understanding" here as "tolerance". Yes If I wont tolare each other then we can't learn anything from each other = inefficient.

"I'm certaintly not trying insult you when I say- time and experience are the best teachers. My perspective definitely changed upon become intimate and comfortable with a boyfriend. Love- Sex- Companionship doesn't come down to numbers-- who/or how many-- what you have and haven't done/ OR what another person has done with their life BEFOE YOU essentially does not matter if you like the individual for who they are NOW. As you get older, you'll find that you'll meet more and more people who'll have a wide range of experiences (some of which you MAY find disgusting). This does not mean that these experiences makes them a bad person (or worthy of harsh judgements from you) .. rather their experiences changed them, made them stronger- perhaps even a better person."

I can't understand one thing. Why sex changes a person? Sex is for fun. It doesn't change personality. Living with people, learning experiences, sharing experiences and communicating does. Like we are doing here. How can a person become more tolerant during or after the sex?

"Also, Haffo I believe your cultural background plays a huge part in how strongly you feel about women having casual sex therefore it is understandable. Yeah you said that you don't like when men do it, but your judgements about women are MUCH harsher."

Maybe. But somehow I doubt about that. Yes my judgement about women were much harsher. I've also explained why.

"Also like BJ says...keep your own morals, but lighten up on the rest of us! Variety is the spice of life and if everyone thought like you NOONE would EVER do it...There would be no children because everyone would be so worried about whether this woman is morally deplorable barring being a virgin...and BELIEVE you me I have known virgins to catch sexually transmitted diseases by oral sex so virginity is ALSO relative."

I know CL. The further this conversation goes, the diginity of women in my eyes falling lower and lower.

"Besides...in these times you were talking about earlier...There wasn't the institution of marriage. Actually that didn't come about (correct me if I'm wrong) until "Christianity". People did mate for life, but they didn't have the restraints of the "rules" for behavior therefore you can't tell me you think people didn't sleep around!"

I know. Perhaps I'm the man of last resistance. I just cant get rid of feel of disgust.

I can't understand one thing. Why sex changes a person? Sex is for fun. It doesn't change personality. Living with people, learning experiences, sharing experiences and communicating does. Like we are doing here. How can a person become more tolerant during or after the sex?

You missed my point- not only does sex change a person- but the entire relationship surrounding the sex. The decision to be in a relationship- to make it sexual or not- to relate to another person who is NOT family, on such personal terms-- on a level more than friends- will change you... not just sex.

Also, I never said "sex is for fun". I did state that FUN is ONE of the reasons a person has sex.

Finally, maybe "understanding" = "tolerance" in your mind. But in my mind, "understanding" = "learn".

To tolerate a person, means to put up with or endure. People don't exist for the acceptance of others- so I don't talk to people just so I can endure them.

When I think of understanding someone, I mean learn from them- and accept their experiences as part of my own. Perhaps learn from their mistakes- maybe grow from their triumphs. I will accept them... and I know where they are coming from.

"I know CL. The further this conversation goes, the diginity of women in my eyes falling lower and lower."

I'm sorry you feel that way...really I am. You should try men...they are pretty hunky beefcakes! LOL

http://www.smileycentral.com/?partner=ZSzeb008_ZSYYYYYYYYUS' target='_blank'>

The further this conversation goes, the diginity of women in my eyes falling lower and lower.
This statement here- only further shows you are not seeking "understanding" - not for tolerance or to learn. No one here is asking you to change your moral stance on sex. However- why does a conversation with 4-5 women make the dignity of ALL women fall in your eyes?

How can you feel this way, when a conversation about all Pisces would piss you off?

I know. Perhaps I'm the man of last resistance. I just cant get rid of feel of disgust.

What exactly are you fighting for? What resistance?

What makes you so sure- in a conversation of only about 8 people, you are the last man standing on this issue of sex? If you are.. ever thought that maybe you're wrong? Who wants to be the last man to believe that the earth is flat?

How can you learn from someone (understand them) if you're judging them?

"You missed my point- not only does sex change a person- but the entire relationship surrounding the sex. The decision to be in a relationship- to make it sexual or not- to relate to another person who is NOT family, on such personal terms-- on a level more than friends- will change you... not just sex."

Lets digest this sentense by sentense:

1.You missed my point- not only does sex change a person- but the entire relationship surrounding the sex.

Two person who has sexual intercouse, start to feel each other more wanted?

2.The decision to be in a relationship- to make it sexual or not- to relate to another person who is NOT family, on such personal terms-- on a level more than friends- will change you... not just sex.

So, basicly sex is for fun. Being close to another person is enough to change you.

"This statement here- only further shows you are not seeking "understanding" - not for tolerance or to learn. No one here is asking you to change your moral stance on sex. However- why does a conversation with 4-5 women make the dignity of ALL women fall in your eyes?"

No not true. I'm here to understand things. And this is how I feel so far. It changes diginity of ALL women because I give probability to the point that the way you think, maybe is common sense of all women.

" What exactly are you fighting for? What resistance?"

I'm fighting for diginity.

"What makes you so sure- in a conversation of only about 8 people, you are the last man standing on this issue of sex? If you are.. ever thought that maybe you're wrong? Who wants to be the last man to believe that the earth is flat?"

I have never met a men so far who take this topic that seriously. Most of them want to play with women (sex included) and move on.

CL that was funny. But I don't feel anything sexually to the men.

"How can you learn from someone (understand them) if you're judging them?"

"How can you learn from someone (understand them) if you're judging them?"

I'm judgeing anyone. You all free to do anything you want. These are your bodies. I was and could be further indifferent to this topic. But on the other hand, I dont want to exclude % 50 percent of population. I want to learn "Why?".

No not true. I'm here to understand things. And this is how I feel so far. It changes diginity of ALL women because I give probability to the point that the way you think, maybe is common sense of all women.

ME- a black woman, living in the United states, age 28- will NOT have the same view point, opinions, ideas, OR morals as:

a Brazillian woman, age 23 living in the UK,

OR as American age 42 living in China,

OR as deeply religious christian woman living Madagascar!!!

OR as Cambodian woman age 18-!!

My point! I speak for ME-- cancerlady speaks for herself!!! Open your mind and see people as individuals- and NOT by the titles you group us as. That's when you begin to Understand.. that's when you begin to learn.. that's when you're no longer posting so you can stand in the judgement of others!

When you digested my post sentence by sentence-- you merely GLAZED over the fact that I wrote, "FUN is ONE of the reasons people have sex".

That's like eating the meat and the potatoes, and picking out the vegetables.

I'm judgeing anyone. You all free to do anything you want. These are your bodies. I was and could be further indifferent to this topic. But on the other hand, I dont want to exclude % 50 percent of population. I want to learn "Why?".

If you're not judging- the why the dignity of 51% of entire the population would lower?

When you digested my post sentence by sentence-- you merely GLAZED over the fact that I wrote, "FUN is ONE of the reasons people have sex".

That's like eating the meat and the potatoes, and picking out the vegetables.

I'm judgeing anyone. You all free to do anything you want. These are your bodies. I was and could be further indifferent to this topic. But on the other hand, I dont want to exclude % 50 percent of population. I want to learn "Why?".

If you're not judging- the why the dignity of 51% of entire the population would lower?

sorry about the double posting.

Opinions of few is very valuable because it gives the information about common sense! You already know the power of common sense. Common sense creates series of preconceptions. Preconceptions may work as defencing mechanism. Sometimes it gives you power see things further than they are. But these preconceptions arent used to judge the individual!

"If you're not judging- the why the dignity of 51% of entire the population would lower?"

Ah I get you. You didn't like the statement. Well it lowers in my personal eyes. Not everyones.

Let's fully understand the words we are using...

Preconception = An opinion or conception formed in advance of adequate knowledge or experience, especially a prejudice or bias.

prejudice: An adverse judgment or opinion formed beforehand or without knowledge or examination of the facts.

common sense: Sound judgment not based on specialized knowledge

They are already low in others eyes, BTW.

I've used words correctly.

I'm not saying you didn't use the words correctly. But you're trying to say that you aren't judging people.. and you are....

BTW- other people who think ALL women have a lower since of dignity- are posting here- you are.

Just because there are other men who agree with you- does not make them any less narrow minded...

and NO haffo-- it's not the statement I didn't like- it's the action. I can't understand why ALL women are being held responsible for things being said by myself or perhaps 3 other people.

I don't even have the same moral standards at my mom- and yet, by saying ALL women have a lowered sense of dignity in YOUR eyes...because of what I said- she has been lumped in- if you were to meet her- you'd pre-judge her-- thinking she felt the same way as I do- when in fact- she does not!

But it doesn't stop there- it's your mom- it's your cousin- it's the girl down the block from your house, it's the female professor who teaches Physics-- it's them all-- their dignity-- in your eyes.. lowered??!! The idea of someone taking the opinions of few-- and broadstroking 51% of the earth's population is.. is.. is at best-- ignorant!! Yes, I said, IGNORANT!