what's the difference?
Being 'in love' & loving someone
Sorry to clarify... what it means if you are "in love" or "loving" someone?
sorry i cannot contribute on this thread and I don't want to be dumb and stupid but I love reading the writings in her. 🙂
Thinking about you're definition DJB and it's spot on to how I am!
Posted by supershiwiPosted by starlover
in love is a chemical reaction when we first meet someone which happens to enable us to be attracted to another and therefore procreate ~ it doesnt last
loving someone is not a romantic *notion* ~ it grows and develops with time, it is the *glue* between people and lasts
+1
interesting thread!
but what happens when you've loved somebody for a very long time and everything is perfect and then you fall in love with someone else?
How do you cope with your body fooling your heart.
Do you follow your head or your heart?
And if your heart goes out to someone else, how can it be fair to the person you've loved for so long?click to expand
I personally don't think you can be "in love" with two people at once. In your scenario you are "in love" with one but you love the other...you love the one you spent a great deal of time and energy on and don't want to lose that but you are "in love" or infatuated with the other. It's your desire to be felt and to feel...
I agree with all of you.
How long does the "in love" phase last for you?
Twice it lasted surprisingly long for me. Five years of butterflies in my stomach each time I saw him, heart racing and dizziness each time he started talking to me.
How long does the "in love" phase last for you?
Twice it lasted surprisingly long for me. Five years of butterflies in my stomach each time I saw him, heart racing and dizziness each time he started talking to me.
On a general note,
Like is liking someone, but conditionally.
Love is liking someone unconditionally.
In-love is just glorification of a temporary infatuation, at times temporary madness. In certain cases, it may eventually turn into love.
'Being in love' = Selfish
'Loving someone' = Selfless
This sounds morbid, but I think of it in terms of how I would react if they died...
If I like someone and they died, I would be sad and cry once or twice.
If I am in love with someone and they died, I would be devastated and cry for days or weeks or months.
If I love someone and they died, I would want to die too. (metaphorically or perhaps literally, who knows?)
It is very easy to for one to fall in love, any fool could do it, that singular rush of in-fatuous high, at times utterly irrational, partially a novelty.
It is very difficult to for one to love someone, for ones world no longer consist of only one's own well-being but two whole parts, intertwined. Even though one may remain independent, there is a part of you that knows, what happens in one's life will impact upon theirs.
The former may require less amounts of trust as both parties are thinking of themselves and their own emotional gains from the chemistry/connection, the latter requires one to step out of ones shoes often, a give and take within a (supposedly concrete) commitment, which require stupendous amounts of trust.
Like is liking someone, but conditionally.
Love is liking someone unconditionally.
In-love is just glorification of a temporary infatuation, at times temporary madness. In certain cases, it may eventually turn into love.
'Being in love' = Selfish
'Loving someone' = Selfless
This sounds morbid, but I think of it in terms of how I would react if they died...
If I like someone and they died, I would be sad and cry once or twice.
If I am in love with someone and they died, I would be devastated and cry for days or weeks or months.
If I love someone and they died, I would want to die too. (metaphorically or perhaps literally, who knows?)
It is very easy to for one to fall in love, any fool could do it, that singular rush of in-fatuous high, at times utterly irrational, partially a novelty.
It is very difficult to for one to love someone, for ones world no longer consist of only one's own well-being but two whole parts, intertwined. Even though one may remain independent, there is a part of you that knows, what happens in one's life will impact upon theirs.
The former may require less amounts of trust as both parties are thinking of themselves and their own emotional gains from the chemistry/connection, the latter requires one to step out of ones shoes often, a give and take within a (supposedly concrete) commitment, which require stupendous amounts of trust.
When in love, one is more often than not addicted, to a certain adrenaline rush, it becomes more of a crush and/or obsession than otherwise.
The Crush: One feels a crush for another person, for no good reason at all, at times. Often, the object of the crush may not even be aware of it. It can be described as an irrational desire and/or admiration for the other person, which is totally uncalled for, or has no rational cause. Usually, this desire is almost purely physical: has to do with physical beauty, carriage, manners, smell, etc of the other person. It is a likeness from a distance, such that one has for someone whom one doesn't even speak to, or in close proximity, with someone whom one just says hello.
The Obessions: However, is a more mature form of the crush. While the crush may be slightly juvenile and immature in origin, the obsession stems from an advanced stage of the crush, where emotions and thoughts have been nurtured continuously to an inferno. Usually, at the obsessive stage, the obsessive person has plucked up the courage to develop some little relationship with the object of his or her desire without the latter being aware of it (those this may not be the case for all). What makes the latter an obsession is that the object of the desire is either unaware of this desire, or does not appreciate it within the same depth, same breadth etc.
In the long run, causing butterflies at every turn and every time one connects with the other party will eventually phase out, for this state could hardly be sustained, hence the flames will die down, as one would expect, or worse, it may cause a combustible reaction, an explosion and/or implosion.
The Crush: One feels a crush for another person, for no good reason at all, at times. Often, the object of the crush may not even be aware of it. It can be described as an irrational desire and/or admiration for the other person, which is totally uncalled for, or has no rational cause. Usually, this desire is almost purely physical: has to do with physical beauty, carriage, manners, smell, etc of the other person. It is a likeness from a distance, such that one has for someone whom one doesn't even speak to, or in close proximity, with someone whom one just says hello.
The Obessions: However, is a more mature form of the crush. While the crush may be slightly juvenile and immature in origin, the obsession stems from an advanced stage of the crush, where emotions and thoughts have been nurtured continuously to an inferno. Usually, at the obsessive stage, the obsessive person has plucked up the courage to develop some little relationship with the object of his or her desire without the latter being aware of it (those this may not be the case for all). What makes the latter an obsession is that the object of the desire is either unaware of this desire, or does not appreciate it within the same depth, same breadth etc.
In the long run, causing butterflies at every turn and every time one connects with the other party will eventually phase out, for this state could hardly be sustained, hence the flames will die down, as one would expect, or worse, it may cause a combustible reaction, an explosion and/or implosion.
When a relationship is in its youthful stage, both parties are starry-eyed about each other, they believe they are in love. They feel the temporary butterflies.
When a relationship matures, that true love must be tested, time and again.
Love that tests true to diverse storms and passes the true love tests may not feel the butterflies and starry-eyed-ness of the young ravenous couple next door, who can not take their eyes or hands off each other. When a relationship/commitment which goes through stormy times (this is a must for every relationship) and still endures, it means that the butterflies still persist. The other person still gives you a reason to hold on; still has that something; the fire, the smile, the look in their eyes, the personality, the charm to make you still hold on, despite all the ups and downs. At this level, you know that you love that person truly.
When a relationship matures, that true love must be tested, time and again.
Love that tests true to diverse storms and passes the true love tests may not feel the butterflies and starry-eyed-ness of the young ravenous couple next door, who can not take their eyes or hands off each other. When a relationship/commitment which goes through stormy times (this is a must for every relationship) and still endures, it means that the butterflies still persist. The other person still gives you a reason to hold on; still has that something; the fire, the smile, the look in their eyes, the personality, the charm to make you still hold on, despite all the ups and downs. At this level, you know that you love that person truly.
One could prevent falling in love with someone else, while being in a committed relationship.
I fall in love when I'm deliberately looking for love or (at least) leaving my guard down. Oh, and I need to meet the right person as well. And that person has to express an interest!
I fall in love when I'm deliberately looking for love or (at least) leaving my guard down. Oh, and I need to meet the right person as well. And that person has to express an interest!
'Being in love' = Selfish
'Loving someone' = Selfless
Being in love could make people appear selfish, when in reality they are "stoned" by drugs produced in their brains.
Loving someone is not selfless, judging by the amount of claims that one has to love oneself to be able to love someone else (as well).
'Loving someone' = Selfless
Being in love could make people appear selfish, when in reality they are "stoned" by drugs produced in their brains.
Loving someone is not selfless, judging by the amount of claims that one has to love oneself to be able to love someone else (as well).
When one is in love there is a lack of understanding and comprehension on a whole, the understanding is one based on fantasy, based upon infatuation, based upon what one would like and not what is. When one loves there is a total understanding (or at least that is the goal), of what is and what exists in reality, to comprehend deeply of who, what, and how the other individual operates, thinks, feels etc. behind all the masks, or facades in which we may wear whilst out in society, at work and so forth.
The love you have for someone you want to make your life partner needs to be stronger than filial love, because you want to hang in there, for better or worse, till death do us part. Understanding these core differences, immediately opens our eye of understanding to know exactly what emotions we feel and where we stand with the various loved ones in our lives.
The love you have for someone you want to make your life partner needs to be stronger than filial love, because you want to hang in there, for better or worse, till death do us part. Understanding these core differences, immediately opens our eye of understanding to know exactly what emotions we feel and where we stand with the various loved ones in our lives.
Posted by Undine
'Being in love' = Selfish
'Loving someone' = Selfless
Being in love could make people appear selfish, when in reality they are "stoned" by drugs produced in their brains.
Loving someone is not selfless, judging by the amount of claims that one has to love oneself to be able to love someone else (as well).
Undine, I did put a disclaimer before writing, that it may be nothing but a general overview. However, if one must be more specific I agree with you wholly, in love one is run by endorphins. Self-less as in putting others well-being high up in the category as one would in regards to the well-being of the self, not a doormat though.
Posted by everevolvingepithetPosted by Undine
'Being in love' = Selfish
'Loving someone' = Selfless
Being in love could make people appear selfish, when in reality they are "stoned" by drugs produced in their brains.
Loving someone is not selfless, judging by the amount of claims that one has to love oneself to be able to love someone else (as well).
How is smoking a doob connected to being selfish or in love?click to expand
LOL! I never smoked doob. But each time I fall in love I feel high. Sometimes "stoned" and boring, other times daring and crazy. Too much of my own endorphines being released, or too sensitive of a brain.
Anyway...a bit too challenging for the partner...no wonder that each time I fall in love BEFORE he does, I get dumped!
You can LOVE someone in many ways, but it takes a special kind of feeling and connection to be IN LOVE with someone.
Join the Conversation. Explore Yourself. Connect with Others.
Discover insights, swap stories, and find people. dxpnet is where experiences turn into understanding.
Create Your Free Account →Related Topics
Would you cheat? So easy to do these days with fb, texting and everyone walking around with mini computers at their hip.
Off the top of my head: American Colombian Mexican Spanish Dutch Belgian Italian New Zealand Australia Frenc
...for the bad treatment they received afterwards. This is all I'm seeing on Dxp. Grown ass women bitching and moanin
to all the juicy threads?? Granted, some get pretty mean but a lot is quite funny :P
I kept her memory warm in my heart. Thinking of her sometimes 3 or 4 times a day. At night, she would enter my thoughts,
Today it got me thinking again about this question, i haven't put thought into this for a while. i was at a festival for
I think that I was just in one, but not sure. I think it's when one person wants to be in the relationship, and the othe
I have been with my boyfriend for a year now, we went through some issues a few months back but now we are closer, more
Thought this was funny... NINE WORDS WOMEN USE 1 FINE: This is the word women use to end an argument when they ar
but that you actually know? (SO = Significant Other) I found this question on another website and have been engross
What is your preference men? A girl that is more naturally beautiful or one that puts her face on every morning (I don't
I have Mars in the 1st and sometimes i can be so blunt sometimes! I mean i don't mean to be that way... like today i was
Play the games (if you want to call it that) that women (are supposed to) play... ya know, don't text right away, don't
My relationship of 1 and a half years ended 3 months ago. Been dealing with it, no contact for most of it, it was hard h
..isnt it safe to say that YOU may be the problem?
How do yall feel about couples who share one facebook account. I think it's ridiculous! Makes it appear they don't t
I HEAR THIS ALL THE TIME IN PUBS. WHAT A FUCKED UP WAY TO START OUT WITH A BIRD. WHY DO YOU DIPSHITS START OUT THIS WAY
At what point in a relationship do u think its ok to not use condoms?
Just wondering... I dont really. But i don't go much for guys like oriental/asian/muslim/middle eastern... idk just d
Dominated in during sex. Women do you or can step up and dominate men in bed? I think all men like to some level of bei