Cool Off With my Girlfriend😢

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Shades
@Aquarius3189
9 Years1,000+ Posts

Comments: 0 · Posts: 1266 · Topics: 54
so i pretty much been smoking since i was 16 i know its bad for my health and recently i had the courage to gradually stop for a month i’ve smoke not more than 10 sticks(kind of an accomplishment with my 7 sticks a day if i do say so myself) at the beginning my girlfriend doesnt believe it since i’ve attempted before and coudnt commit but this time i have shown progress i didnt in the past.i dont know when it started but my gf has been a control freak and to my dismay she notices my language,the way i dress,the way i talk even when i tell stories to people that i feel i stopped being me,we had a fight about it i told her she always think of what people will say to her that she doesnt see how controlling she is now,we said our sorry ofcourse i told her my mistake too,then today i had this emotion because of a problem ,i grab a drink and i bought 1 stick when i got home there she is at the door waiting for me i showed her my stick to let her know im not going to hide it and lie to her,she rants which i told her let me be for now because its not like im going to go back like i use to like cmon give me some credit but no she goes all captain marvel at me which pisses me off so i poker faced and didnt speak because i know she woudnt listen and im so not in the mood to argue right now,apparently that made her angry to the point where she chatted me “we should probably cool it off for now i cant tell you my reason but let me be for awhile”,i messaged her saying my piece i dont know where its going tomorrow

but any thoughts——
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Vacation Queen
@saggurl88
12 Years25,000+ Posts

Comments: 22238 · Posts: 25616 · Topics: 84
Well she can’t go anywhere if you live and work together. What do you think she will do? Maybe she’s just trying to make you nervous since you keep trying to quit and are blatantly in her face smoking and not doing what you say you will do.

Maybe let her know that she’s over reacting and you’ve been doing well weaning yourself off and you need her support to continue.
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AriesJo
@AriesJo
10 Years500+ Posts

Comments: 0 · Posts: 798 · Topics: 55


It’s very rare I say this. But I think you need to have a conversation with her, you need to tell her you are doing your best and trying, and that the way she is, is controlling and very negative. You sound like you want to give up, but it’s her that’s making it harder. And am I right in thinking that she knew about your smoking habit when you met her? Because I don’t think she has a leg to stand on. She has no right to have a go at you, if she didn’t like it when you met, then she can’t goad now. In fact, she’s in the wrong, because she lied, she lied at the start of the relationship telling herself she wasn’t bothered, but she clearly is. And this is wasting your time.

If you think she’s controlling, then this isn’t going to change. Ever. And even if it did change, you will always remember how she is now. Years down the line, do you think you could potentially get married to this control freak? Think about it seriously, because right now, it sounds like you’re wasting the best years of your life. I was with a control bitch for 7 years, I regret that it wasn’t more like 3 or 4, cos I defo wasted years with the wrong person. This is what you need to think about.
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Shades
@Aquarius3189
9 Years1,000+ Posts

Comments: 0 · Posts: 1266 · Topics: 54
I am so sorry for not replying for the last month,i cant access my account for stupid reasons,just an update for you guys its been great for my gf and me until i picked up a liquor and this made her go mad with “i dont fucking care anymore do what you want to do” but i talked to her saying that its my last drink because i woudnt have the time to do it while im finding a new job because i need to be sober,i just blabber my heart out and she woudnt look at me even if i told her thy most honest truth,i even told her how i feel like she is my mama more than my gf i’ve been the most honest with her in my entire life,i dont know the outcome of my honesty tomorrow to be honest so wish me luck on not losing a gf,thank you all for the advice i really appreciate it😊