roamingfree
@roamingfree
14 Years1,000+ PostsGemini
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Open to love.... (Page 2)
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In regards to love...I think we live & we learn. & yes! Many lessons in life have proved to be painful but none the less we come out wiser have experienced them.I really do agree with RF..in order to be able to give that 110% in a relationship we must be totally content with self first...we cannot receive if we don't have ourself to give...I also think when you know who are, are happy,confident & secure with who you are such behavior from other people will simply not be tolerated. When you can sit back, relax & enjoy who you are & your own company others will too! Love strikes us when we least expect it & no matter what I've went thru or endured in previous relationships I will not detour the oppty to love & be loved again...weak people who treat others badly are just that....weak and the ones that allow that type of treatment just don't know how strong they are! I refuse to let a weak individual change my perspective on love or deprive myself from it! Providing the right man come along....I don't fall easily, I don't date casually and at this moment I'm open to it...=)
Posted by missscorp
In regards to love...I think we live & we learn. & yes! Many lessons in life have proved to be painful but none the less we come out wiser have experienced them.I really do agree with RF..in order to be able to give that 110% in a relationship we must be totally content with self first...we cannot receive if we don't have ourself to give...I also think when you know who are, are happy,confident & secure with who you are such behavior from other people will simply not be tolerated. When you can sit back, relax & enjoy who you are & your own company others will too! Love strikes us when we least expect it & no matter what I've went thru or endured in previous relationships I will not detour the oppty to love & be loved again...weak people who treat others badly are just that....weak and the ones that allow that type of treatment just don't know how strong they are! I refuse to let a weak individual change my perspective on love or deprive myself from it! Providing the right man come along....I don't fall easily, I don't date casually and at this moment I'm open to it...=)
and that's a fantastic place to be at. 🙂 I was in that exact place when that one Libra walked in and to be honest, I'm heading that way already. It's exhilarating and addictive to be consciously happy with oneself
🙂
Lady Luck is fickle and Lady Love knows where we live. She can walk on her two feet unaided and will waltz in at the moment it suits her, but she will balk if you try to force her through your door.
@RF...I know that place exactly!! and I know exactly what you mean! I too let this one crab waltz into my life and am doing everything in my power not to lose myself & all the work I put to get to this place with the infamous dance...I get caught up with his side-stepping sometimes & it can overwhelm me....I call a time out to regroup my thoughts and focus on me & what's truly important in life and seem to sometimes be hangin on a thread being successful at it!!! I refuse to let a man define me but dammit if I'm not hypnotized by him!!!! Hahaha! It takes us girls time to find our way...our heart resilient and has the power to bouce back even if it does take forever & a day!and damned that LadyLove! She found me when I didn't want to be found!!!and I tip-toed in the beginning...graduated to the walts and now I think I want the song to end!!!
To stay in an abusive relationship due to ignorance of it, is what causes you to be stupid enough to continue with the same kind relationships over and over again.
If you don't want to 'get' that .... then suffer more as you wish.
If you don't want to 'get' that .... then suffer more as you wish.
Of course, I realize it's asking alot for a Gemini to get that.
Try .....
Try .....
How does (1)angry lil mouse somehow manage to turn any thread they touch into some type of bashing of another person? What's up with that? If ya got nothing positive to say...then crawl back into the hole you came from
But back to the subject at hand! I say past experiences in love even when they hurt are still very much learning experiences, ones to never regret but use as tools for future experiences
Awwwww....=) gotta luvit!!
Take it slow..one day at a time...let your heart speak to you, let him do the work and see where it leads...the only regrets we sometimes have in life are the chances we never took....
Open to the same kind of abusive relationship repeatedly because you don't possess the strength to grow from your mistakes isn't open for love.
It's open for distaster in which I'm sure you're not going to mind one bit that everybody around you gets to hear about it the misery of it.
Before you can open yourself to love ... you first have to fix yourself, and this concept seems to fly right over top the head.
It's open for distaster in which I'm sure you're not going to mind one bit that everybody around you gets to hear about it the misery of it.
Before you can open yourself to love ... you first have to fix yourself, and this concept seems to fly right over top the head.
Baggage ... and not minding that you have it, at all.
Just open up and not care to deal with it ... let some poor sod deal with it, until he can't take it anymore and starts to fuck you.
Just open up and not care to deal with it ... let some poor sod deal with it, until he can't take it anymore and starts to fuck you.
Posted by missscorp
the only regrets we sometimes have in life are the chances we never took....
love this.
I forgot to live by that for a second.
@RF I try to! Its better to try & fall then not to try at all....=) everytime we fall. We get up a lot quicker the next time around =) put on your helmet & brace yourself!
@RF I try to! Its better to try & fall then not to try at all....=) everytime we fall. We get up a lot quicker the next time around =) put on your helmet & brace yourself!
Posted by dreamer23Posted by P-Angel
Baggage ... and not minding that you have it, at all.
Just open up and not care to deal with it ... let some poor sod deal with it, until he can't take it anymore and starts to fuck you.
What? For a very intelligent woman, you can be so condescending. But maybe thats your angle. Pfft.click to expand
I think it's more like a shock therapy tactic lol. Perhaps she's trying to see who can look past the vitriol and find the nuggets of truth she offers?
... I kissed a toad for 3 years who all did was abuse me ...
... than spent 10 years with a frog of Aqua who cheated and lied constantly ...
... had a thingy with CaprArius - who back stabbed me till not end ...
... it was a one Libra for a couple months who was way off his scales, and ended up being my stalker ...
... after that it was Cancer who was two timing me...
----------------------------------------------------------------------------
I am talking about the kind of person who spends at least 13 years engaging the same kind of relationship, while proclaiming that they are open for love.
If you never learn from a relationship, and do the same fucking thing over and over .... then the only thing you are open to is another man to fuck you over.
It's called baggage .... and the woman who spends her love wasting it all on bullshit, as we see happened above, by her own admission, doesnt' mind at all that she has it, for if she minded then she would have at least tried to grow from the first relatinship she mentions.
If you can't get that dreamer ... oh well, what do I care?
... than spent 10 years with a frog of Aqua who cheated and lied constantly ...
... had a thingy with CaprArius - who back stabbed me till not end ...
... it was a one Libra for a couple months who was way off his scales, and ended up being my stalker ...
... after that it was Cancer who was two timing me...
----------------------------------------------------------------------------
I am talking about the kind of person who spends at least 13 years engaging the same kind of relationship, while proclaiming that they are open for love.
If you never learn from a relationship, and do the same fucking thing over and over .... then the only thing you are open to is another man to fuck you over.
It's called baggage .... and the woman who spends her love wasting it all on bullshit, as we see happened above, by her own admission, doesnt' mind at all that she has it, for if she minded then she would have at least tried to grow from the first relatinship she mentions.
If you can't get that dreamer ... oh well, what do I care?
I'm not talking to misscorp, and never have in this thread. I've been addressing the Gemini ... if the Scorpio takes it personally, when I never pointed her out ... oh well, she can suffer as she wishes to.
My heart will always be open to love regardless of the hurt or disappointment I have experienced in my past...I will not allow a bad experience from my past to take away from what can be the best in the future for there is no greater gift than to love & be loved =)
@dreamer....how are things coming along with your Taurus thus far? @pangel...so harsh?!
Posted by missscorp
This is for both the men & women in the forum..When you have been hurt,deeply hurt in a past relationship & never want to experience that hurt again...do you find you date casually but never allow yourself to truly feel or develope feelings for the other person, do you purposely set your must have criteria in a mate so high,in hopes of no one ever coming close, have those invisible walls up so high so no one can get to the other side.. or would you consider it a learning experience of how to better handle situations in your next relationship..should you have a deep fear of loving after being deeply wounded & the right person come along would you not think twice about being in a commited relationship?...post your sign and your aftermath point of view...Me...well I choose to love as if I've never been hurt before =)I'm justa scorp girl =)
You'll never have that kind of relationship in a world where you're afraid to take the first step because all you see is every negative thing 10 miles down the road.
When ever I get hurt by someone i have loved, I tell myself, "never again!" But there i go again. Hoping that the next one would be the one. I just hate having to be hurt so many times, and if and when true loves comes, I dont have the spunk i used to when it comes to love. Its like the past hurtful relationships killed it. I wished I could have bipassed all those hurtful relationships and give my full strength love to the one who really deserves it.
Is roaming
Sad kinda song....
Posted by missscorps
Is roaming
I believe so, but she is busy being engaged I think.
I don't think I have invented that - I am pretty sure there was an announcement a little while ago.
How the hell did I bugger that up?
Posted by missscorp
This is for both the men & women in the forum..When you have been hurt,deeply hurt in a past relationship & never want to experience that hurt again...do you find you date casually but never allow yourself to truly feel or develope feelings for the other person, do you purposely set your must have criteria in a mate so high,in hopes of no one ever coming close, have those invisible walls up so high so no one can get to the other side.. or would you consider it a learning experience of how to better handle situations in your next relationship..should you have a deep fear of loving after being deeply wounded & the right person come along would you not think twice about being in a commited relationship?...post your sign and your aftermath point of view...Me...well I choose to love as if I've never been hurt before =)I'm justa scorp girl =)
I am just a Sag girl... 🙂 Not always a bad thing but not always good either. A mix of spice, fire, and ice. Whoosh!
When I have been deeply hurt 1. I cannot let go that easy. 2. I then get angry. 3. I don't date for a while. It usually takes me about a year (depending on the length of the relationship) to date again.
I am a Sag and if you all know anything about them, we do not commit all that easy. But when we do, we give it our all. We are fierce in our loyalties, love and we give everything to our partner. I think that is why screw up even the best potentialed relationships.
I do not have a high criteria per say, bcus I just finally figured out what it is I want in a mate!!!!
I do have to say though after being hurt so many times, my defenses are up way high. Most men cannot break through. I am deathly afraid of the unknown and being hurt again, so for the most part I sabatoge a relationship before he even has a chance to hurt me first. Sad I know, but true.
I may be a Sag girl, but after much needed digging after my last failed relationship I have caught site of the pattern. Now I just need to break it!
Nobody is open to love. They may think they are, but, they aren't .. and are so blinded that they wouldn't be able to recognize that this even if told.
People have certain criteria that is acceptable to them, they have certain conditions in which have to be in place in order for them to feel that they are being treated according to their standards, and then they set out to measure each new person they have a crush on against their expectations that they've developed, usually via past emotional injuries.
Instead of people deciding what will make them happy, and be progressive ..... they usually focus on the negativities of past emotional pain to determine what they don't want. For this reason is why most people cannot use LOA in a positive manner = because they measure by what they don't want
Even in this open of love you are referring to, as you described in your OP = you used past emotional injuries as a basis for measuring.
To be open to love, which would also be an unconditional love, it would indicate that you have no values, no standards, no terms or conditions .. and would have to take the other persons love, in any fashion, as they would choose to give it to you.
Nobody is going to do that ..... though they are so blinded, as everyone saw with Roaming, that they would believe that the presence of feelings on one side = a belief that the other is the exact same, and would forgo their own conception of love.
People have certain criteria that is acceptable to them, they have certain conditions in which have to be in place in order for them to feel that they are being treated according to their standards, and then they set out to measure each new person they have a crush on against their expectations that they've developed, usually via past emotional injuries.
Instead of people deciding what will make them happy, and be progressive ..... they usually focus on the negativities of past emotional pain to determine what they don't want. For this reason is why most people cannot use LOA in a positive manner = because they measure by what they don't want
Even in this open of love you are referring to, as you described in your OP = you used past emotional injuries as a basis for measuring.
To be open to love, which would also be an unconditional love, it would indicate that you have no values, no standards, no terms or conditions .. and would have to take the other persons love, in any fashion, as they would choose to give it to you.
Nobody is going to do that ..... though they are so blinded, as everyone saw with Roaming, that they would believe that the presence of feelings on one side = a belief that the other is the exact same, and would forgo their own conception of love.
@nicearies...thx 🙂@ sag girl...sounds like you got yourself pegged....its only when we recognize our faults that we aquire the tools to fix them...its when we're in denial about them that harms us the most. After being hurt by someone you loved & trusted i think it natural to have your guard up, being hurt is no fun...like you I when I love, I love hard & share all that I have to give...I dont fall easily but when I do...I fall deeply....about those walls....when the right one comes along he will hop right over them....and you'll be glad he did!
To the lil mouse...being open to love after you have been deeply wounded in no way indicates ones lack of "values" but quite the contrary, I think being open to love after being deeply hurt shows just how much you "value" yourself and know you can still love deeply and be loved deeply as well...standards, well one does not lower their standards in hopes of finding love not this one anyway! One is not damaged because they have been hurt it makes us human & to open to it again knowingly deserving. I think its when you don't value yourself or others that you close your mind/ heart off to the wonderous gift of love at which point you also deprive yourself....as well as the other....like when you fall off a bike.....and scrape your knees....you dont get back on because you dont value yourself or have low standards....maybe your scared, you dont ride for awhile but when you do get back on its because you love it, it makes your heart happy and you " know" you. "Deserve" to feel what makes you happy....if you chose to never ride again...its you that suffers...the gift if the ride....like that quote " in love I wiuld rather know,experience & be disappointed them to not know but forever wonder"
I am a Virgo. When I get heartbroken, I usually take a break from dating. I do not really "jump back" into the dating scene easily, and I usually put up a wall. It takes a lot for me to open up and give my all to a person. As much as I want to just jump in, I cannot.
25th.....one day....when you very least expect it too...an amazing woman is going to cross your path & rock you to the core......Change that whole idea bout love you currently have goin in!....virgochk....I think this is very natural....defense mechanism....a broken heart is no fun......but true love is simply the best.....when you manage to experience/know, its simply the best!
Posted by missscorp
This is for both the men & women in the forum..When you have been hurt,deeply hurt in a past relationship & never want to experience that hurt again...do you find you date casually but never allow yourself to truly feel or develope feelings for the other person, do you purposely set your must have criteria in a mate so high,in hopes of no one ever coming close, have those invisible walls up so high so no one can get to the other side.. or would you consider it a learning experience of how to better handle situations in your next relationship..should you have a deep fear of loving after being deeply wounded & the right person come along would you not think twice about being in a commited relationship?...post your sign and your aftermath point of view...Me...well I choose to love as if I've never been hurt before =)I'm justa scorp girl =)
Kind of ironic, imo. Dopamine is the result of exercising and other activities. "Love" is also the result of sex, physical attraction and bonding. The primary purpose it serves is for reproduction so, to block yourself off from "love" is kind of silly eh?
I guess when you say you're not open to love its almost like you're saying that you're not open to kids or sex. *shrug*
Siily, but so many after experiencing deep depths of hurt are NOT open to it.....understandably so...
My divorce ripped my heart out, and I haven't found it again yet. It's been nearly two years since she moved out. I moved across the country, am taking care of my kids, go to work every day, and doing all the normal stuff that people do. I have tried dating some since my divorce but it just isn't right. I didn't stop at a few walls, I built a fortress.
Part of me still thinks that when I meet the 'right' person that my fortress won't matter and I'll dive right off my tower walls. Another part of me thinks that I am so defensive and untrusting that I may have already blown her off. One corner says love isn't real??_ and even if it is, it isn't worth it.
Throughout my life I wanted to be a husband and have a family, I did that. I never did casual dating and still have no interest in it. The difference is that I can't do commitment right now either. I want it but am not willing to give the trust, or to open myself up like that again. It puts me in a strange spot. I crave companionship, I don't need anyone around (I have been doing fine) but I want someone to share life with. At the same time I am afraid to let someone get close. Of course I realize that this is all just my heart and my mind battling it out but until the fight is over who knows what will happen. Hermit or heartache... which is worse?
Part of me still thinks that when I meet the 'right' person that my fortress won't matter and I'll dive right off my tower walls. Another part of me thinks that I am so defensive and untrusting that I may have already blown her off. One corner says love isn't real??_ and even if it is, it isn't worth it.
Throughout my life I wanted to be a husband and have a family, I did that. I never did casual dating and still have no interest in it. The difference is that I can't do commitment right now either. I want it but am not willing to give the trust, or to open myself up like that again. It puts me in a strange spot. I crave companionship, I don't need anyone around (I have been doing fine) but I want someone to share life with. At the same time I am afraid to let someone get close. Of course I realize that this is all just my heart and my mind battling it out but until the fight is over who knows what will happen. Hermit or heartache... which is worse?
LSid....both! Hermit w/a heartache....understandably so, its not easy bouncing back this takes time & everyones "bounce back" different. Do not punish yourself by assuming everyone will do you wrong because there's someone special out there that will do you right. Trust....well, it just takes time & time heals wounds. You live, you learn & know better for next time. Sometimes it just happens......when you least expect it, your not looking for it & you think your not open to it......the right one just may inspire you flee your fortress afterall....giving/receiving love ks one of the greatest gifts we have to give....dont deprive yourself or someone else.
I'm an Aqua
I'm actually going through a real bad break up right now. (3+ years) I honestly don't feel like dating for a while.
1)to focus on fixing my bad habits and just making myself a better person (you can't love anyone without loving yourself right?)
2)to maybe find out more about me
3) I'm actually a little nervous about dating. I feel odd now, like a barrier is going to surround me and make me scared to trust again.
I'm actually going through a real bad break up right now. (3+ years) I honestly don't feel like dating for a while.
1)to focus on fixing my bad habits and just making myself a better person (you can't love anyone without loving yourself right?)
2)to maybe find out more about me
3) I'm actually a little nervous about dating. I feel odd now, like a barrier is going to surround me and make me scared to trust again.
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