Update to baby momma drama!

Well his mom got us both together so we could iron out our problems for the sake of the baby boy. Like I told the Baby Momma, I don't have anything against her. I have no issues honestly, except for the recent drama. So I asked her what did I do to her to make her dislike me? She said jealousy played a big part of her disliking me. She always held it in her mind that because he loves his son so much that they would get together and a fairytale life would happen. When he chose to be with me, that hurt her (I can understand how she felt, being in love with someone who doesn't feel the same about u). Then she spoke about the party. She admitted that she only went because she knew I would be there and wanted to cause trouble. For me, that was my whe to ask her about her conversation with him in the kitchen. At least about the sex part, I could careless about whatever else they spoke about. That's when she got mad saying it's not my business. Of course I defended myself. As long as I am in a relationship with him, anything concerning sex concerns me! Point blank. But I tried, as peaceful as I could to explain to her why I asked about the comment. I also let her know that I didn't appreciate the disrespect. I would never approach my ex and ask for sex knowing he's with someone else! Well bottom line to that convo, she pretty much said that she will somehow find a way back in his bed. That's when his mom stepped in to calm the situation. While we were talking, my b/f called and I explained to him what was going on and he was a little pissed. 1 because me nor his mom told him about the meet up and 2 because he didn't want me to have to deal with her craziness. Well to end the conversation, he was placed on speaker and clearly told her that he is not interested in a relationship with her ever. He only wants to raise his son. Sad part... I still don't think she gets it. I think she is still holding onto the hope that they will get back together.

Side note: he will be filing for visitation for his son so issues like this will not happen again.

Good. Take care.

Listen to me very carefully, OP.

You may or may not understand this, but the probability of overcoming any emotional turmoil and other forms of bad baggage is low.

People who have kids in some place or another have a very low success rate with regard to relationships with single people (who don't have "broken relationship" kids and other emotional troubles).

You, like so many hopeless others here at DXP, are of the opinion that you can somehow have a successful, stable and long-term relationship with another person who clearly has some bad baggage.

You need to cut this whole disaster off, and start anew with a person who does not have broken marriages and family/kid/baby momma drama.

You are only going to suffer if you don't listen to me.

Posted by AnOdeToNoOne
Listen to me very carefully, OP.

You may or may not understand this, but the probability of overcoming any emotional turmoil and other forms of bad baggage is low.

People who have kids in some place or another have a very low success rate with regard to relationships with single people (who don't have "broken relationship" kids and other emotional troubles).

You, like so many hopeless others here at DXP, are of the opinion that you can somehow have a successful, stable and long-term relationship with another person who clearly has some bad baggage.

You need to cut this whole disaster off, and start anew with a person who does not have broken marriages and family/kid/baby momma drama.

You are only going to suffer if you don't listen to me.

I wish it was that easy to just walk away...

I saw this video and thought, "hey, I remember this person, acting all ghetto, and shit"

lol

This thread should be re-titled "Queens fighting over baby daddy"

Posted by Wynter
This thread should be re-titled "Queens fighting over baby daddy"

—

Posted by K_1018
Sounds like headache and heartache waiting to happen. Don't date men with kids until they have sorted out their custodial issues and there is a mutual understanding that there is no romantic relationship between him and the mother.

Get out before it turns extremely crazy.

It hard for me to just walk away. I've already fallen in love with this man. I mean the entire yr we were friends, there was no drama UNTIL she found out we made it "official". I guess I'm holding on to the hope that once custody is set, the drama will be over with. I mean... What leverage will she have then? She'll have to let him see the child or risk being charged with contempt of court.

Posted by LadyTate

Posted by K_1018
Sounds like headache and heartache waiting to happen. Don't date men with kids until they have sorted out their custodial issues and there is a mutual understanding that there is no romantic relationship between him and the mother.

Get out before it turns extremely crazy.

It hard for me to just walk away. I've already fallen in love with this man. I mean the entire yr we were friends, there was no drama UNTIL she found out we made it "official". I guess I'm holding on to the hope that once custody is set, the drama will be over with. I mean... What leverage will she have then? She'll have to let him see the child or risk being charged with contempt of court.

click to expand

Also... There was already an understanding that there was no romantic relationship between him and the mother. She's the one who can't let go of what was.

Think of the child.

I wouldn't even date a single parent or date anyone if I was a single parent until the child or youngest child is atleast 7ish years old.

I don't remember specifics of the last thread I read from you, but I do remember it was drama-tastic.

You seem to get off on this shit and want to stick around.

Posted by LadyTate

Posted by AnOdeToNoOne
Listen to me very carefully, OP.

You may or may not understand this, but the probability of overcoming any emotional turmoil and other forms of bad baggage is low.

People who have kids in some place or another have a very low success rate with regard to relationships with single people (who don't have "broken relationship" kids and other emotional troubles).

You, like so many hopeless others here at DXP, are of the opinion that you can somehow have a successful, stable and long-term relationship with another person who clearly has some bad baggage.

You need to cut this whole disaster off, and start anew with a person who does not have broken marriages and family/kid/baby momma drama.

You are only going to suffer if you don't listen to me.

I wish it was that easy to just walk away...

click to expand

You pregnant?

Posted by AriElla7
I wouldn't even date a single parent or date anyone if I was a single parent until the child or youngest child is atleast 7ish years old.

Men with kids makes me hella insecure

Girl, you are Ciara. Beautiful smart. Quit this Future.dude and go.get.your Russel

Posted by DMV

Posted by AriElla7
I wouldn't even date a single parent or date anyone if I was a single parent until the child or youngest child is atleast 7ish years old.

Men with kids makes me hella insecure

click to expand

I dated a guy with a 7 and 9 yr old and it was ok. The 9 yr old's mother was very friendly and just wanted to know if I was a decent person. Then I dated another guy who had 2 yr old twins and it was crazy. She would come to the house high on something trying to seduce her way into the house to get the kids. He had restraining orders on her and everything. The court deemed the kids unsafe around her.

Posted by AriElla7
I wouldn't even date a single parent or date anyone if I was a single parent until the child or youngest child is atleast 7ish years old.

The baby is 6, he'll be 7 next yr

Posted by rockyroadicecream
I don't remember specifics of the last thread I read from you, but I do remember it was drama-tastic.

You seem to get off on this shit and want to stick around.

Everyone has an opinion.

Posted by DMV

Posted by LadyTate

Posted by AnOdeToNoOne
Listen to me very carefully, OP.

You may or may not understand this, but the probability of overcoming any emotional turmoil and other forms of bad baggage is low.

People who have kids in some place or another have a very low success rate with regard to relationships with single people (who don't have "broken relationship" kids and other emotional troubles).

You, like so many hopeless others here at DXP, are of the opinion that you can somehow have a successful, stable and long-term relationship with another person who clearly has some bad baggage.

You need to cut this whole disaster off, and start anew with a person who does not have broken marriages and family/kid/baby momma drama.

You are only going to suffer if you don't listen to me.

I wish it was that easy to just walk away...

You pregnant?

click to expand

No I'm not pregnant but I am already in love with this man.

So the child is 6 years old, he just had a birthday.... and this (her feelings) have been going on for 6 years? And you said they were never in a relationship, it was just a sex thing from 6 YEARS ago....

I know this isn't what you want to hear but I guarantee he's been sleeping with her on & off for all of those 6 years since the child has been alive & lord only knows what he was telling her that whole time, leading her on & making her believe that someday they would be a family is my guess. It makes sense then why she would say "You aren't going to see your son unless you start sleeping with me AGAIN" That doesn't imply that they haven't had sex for 6 years, it implies that they were having sex recently. Probably while you were just friends for a year, & all the while you were buying her son things and dropping them off which she didn't have a problem with because in her mind she was still sexing him & you were the "dummy" (I'm not saying you're dumb, I'm sure you were coming from a good place, I'm saying this is how she viewed you) that was providing for her child. In her mind, YOU were the side piece, she was the main. So why would she have a problem with you at that point? She "had her man" and some lady "just a friend" on the side taking care of her child materially in his absence. It's only a problem now because you recently became official so he recently stopped giving her the dick. Now she's bitter at you because you have what he's been promising her for 6 years. Now you're the main and she's been demoted to the side piece.

And there is no way in Hell that you're boyfriend/her baby daddy is going to be honest about that with you because that makes him an asshole. He's not going to say - I've been fucking her & leading her to believe that we're a family for 6 years while allowing you to take gifts to my child for the last year. Because that would be admitting he was using you both & lying. It's easier to say - My baby momma is obsessed & crazy. Without mentioning his part in facilitating that craziness.