Well based off this board the "traditional" way doesn't seem much better either. But then again it's hard to gauge since it's not something that is common. At least, not in my experience.
Why girls should ask guys out (Page 2)
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Posted by Arielle83Statistics??
I think relationships are just about chance and percentages.
You're killing me smalls!
@OP. I have asked before but no matter how hard it is for me, I still think if I like someone I would ask. Only to be either not ready mode, just friends with sex, or simply move on after I have opened up & be rejected. Sucks so now I think it should be the guy and talked about it by both. Mutually and see.
The point is, if you ask a guy out, do it confidently
You should only ask out somebody, if you can maintain the confidence level after the guy accepted and you go on a date....
if you think, the main thing is to ask out somebody, and after that it will be the traditional roles, then dont do it...... See, if you ask out a guy, he thinks you are confident and can lead and he will expect this from you....... so if he sees, that you had a courage to ask him out, but your behaviour after that is not confident and couragoues, then he will not respect you, because your behaviour is not consistent..... that is a situation which ends with confusion or fwb
I dont think you should go only with somebody, who is truly interested....... they dont know you, so even if they are just semi-interested in you at first, your character, interesting ideas, your personality may win them over...... again, confidence......
the bad thing is, that there is a double standard unfortunately: if a man chases you and does everything to win you - he is a romantic...... if a girl does the same - she is labelled as desperate lunatic
man brag about how many girls they had sex with (which is easy) girls brag about how many man has fallen for them and doing romantic things for her (which is hard and longer term)........ but hey, this mindset will not disapper in a few years, it was a norm for centuries, just a last 50 or so years it is changing....... slowly, but surely🙂 so girls, dont give up, and pave the way for future generations of girls 🙂
You should only ask out somebody, if you can maintain the confidence level after the guy accepted and you go on a date....
if you think, the main thing is to ask out somebody, and after that it will be the traditional roles, then dont do it...... See, if you ask out a guy, he thinks you are confident and can lead and he will expect this from you....... so if he sees, that you had a courage to ask him out, but your behaviour after that is not confident and couragoues, then he will not respect you, because your behaviour is not consistent..... that is a situation which ends with confusion or fwb
I dont think you should go only with somebody, who is truly interested....... they dont know you, so even if they are just semi-interested in you at first, your character, interesting ideas, your personality may win them over...... again, confidence......
the bad thing is, that there is a double standard unfortunately: if a man chases you and does everything to win you - he is a romantic...... if a girl does the same - she is labelled as desperate lunatic
man brag about how many girls they had sex with (which is easy) girls brag about how many man has fallen for them and doing romantic things for her (which is hard and longer term)........ but hey, this mindset will not disapper in a few years, it was a norm for centuries, just a last 50 or so years it is changing....... slowly, but surely🙂 so girls, dont give up, and pave the way for future generations of girls 🙂
Posted by xtinaPosted by Crapmaster555She has three 🙂
The only think I thought was "Wow, her cat looks just like mine".
Which one 😄click to expand
The gray one.
Posted by tizianiI agree. But seeing as it's not a common occurrence among women I thought I'd bring it up in an encouraging manner. Get the idea circulating at least 🙂
When two people are mutually attracted to one another, it really doesn't matter who makes the first move. The only issue arises at the very beginning when someone mistakes idle interest for genuine attraction and rushes in... which I've seen happen to both men and women alike.
Posted by Pandora101I agree. But obviously whether traditional or not people are still going to get their hearts broken or get used. There's no way to really stop that. But I don't believe we should shelter and coddle women like children.
The point is, if you ask a guy out, do it confidently
You should only ask out somebody, if you can maintain the confidence level after the guy accepted and you go on a date....
if you think, the main thing is to ask out somebody, and after that it will be the traditional roles, then dont do it...... See, if you ask out a guy, he thinks you are confident and can lead and he will expect this from you....... so if he sees, that you had a courage to ask him out, but your behaviour after that is not confident and couragoues, then he will not respect you, because your behaviour is not consistent..... that is a situation which ends with confusion or fwb
I dont think you should go only with somebody, who is truly interested....... they dont know you, so even if they are just semi-interested in you at first, your character, interesting ideas, your personality may win them over...... again, confidence......
the bad thing is, that there is a double standard unfortunately: if a man chases you and does everything to win you - he is a romantic...... if a girl does the same - she is labelled as desperate lunatic
man brag about how many girls they had sex with (which is easy) girls brag about how many man has fallen for them and doing romantic things for her (which is hard and longer term)........ but hey, this mindset will not disapper in a few years, it was a norm for centuries, just a last 50 or so years it is changing....... slowly, but surely🙂 so girls, dont give up, and pave the way for future generations of girls 🙂
If they want to ask, why not?
Posted by xtinawhy not? because of expectations, you ask him out and if he accepts, then you go back to "girl" mindset and want the man to pursue..... which is fine, if you dont get to a "meekly waiting what he would do", which is the core of the problems presented here by various posters........ so, ask him out, if you can handle NOT THE REFUSAL, BUT THE ACCEPTANCE 🙂 that is a hard thing🙂 but if there is a mutual attraction, it will flow, so no headache from this.......... asking him out is easy, but handle the aftermatch is when the headache may come in...... so the main thing is, not that you ask him out, but if you can handle his acceptance and act on it and dont loose yourself afterwardsPosted by Pandora101I agree. But obviously whether traditional or not people are still going to get their hearts broken or get used. There's no way to really stop that. But I don't believe we should shelter and coddle women like children.
The point is, if you ask a guy out, do it confidently
You should only ask out somebody, if you can maintain the confidence level after the guy accepted and you go on a date....
if you think, the main thing is to ask out somebody, and after that it will be the traditional roles, then dont do it...... See, if you ask out a guy, he thinks you are confident and can lead and he will expect this from you....... so if he sees, that you had a courage to ask him out, but your behaviour after that is not confident and couragoues, then he will not respect you, because your behaviour is not consistent..... that is a situation which ends with confusion or fwb
I dont think you should go only with somebody, who is truly interested....... they dont know you, so even if they are just semi-interested in you at first, your character, interesting ideas, your personality may win them over...... again, confidence......
the bad thing is, that there is a double standard unfortunately: if a man chases you and does everything to win you - he is a romantic...... if a girl does the same - she is labelled as desperate lunatic
man brag about how many girls they had sex with (which is easy) girls brag about how many man has fallen for them and doing romantic things for her (which is hard and longer term)........ but hey, this mindset will not disapper in a few years, it was a norm for centuries, just a last 50 or so years it is changing....... slowly, but surely🙂 so girls, dont give up, and pave the way for future generations of girls 🙂
If they want to ask, why not?click to expand
Posted by Pandora101Definitely a good message to put out and spread but just as much in terms of expectaPosted by xtinawhy not? because of expectations, you ask him out and if he accepts, then you go back to "girl" mindset and want the man to pursue..... which is fine, if you dont get to a "meekly waiting what he would do", which is the core of the problems presented here by various posters........ so, ask him out, if you can handle NOT THE REFUSAL, BUT THE ACCEPTANCE 🙂 that is a hard thing🙂 but if there is a mutual attraction, it will flow, so no headache from this.......... asking him out is easy, but handle the aftermatch is when the headache may come in...... so the main thing is, not that you ask him out, but if you can handle his acceptance and act on it and dont loose yourself afterwardsPosted by Pandora101I agree. But obviously whether traditional or not people are still going to get their hearts broken or get used. There's no way to really stop that. But I don't believe we should shelter and coddle women like children.
The point is, if you ask a guy out, do it confidently
You should only ask out somebody, if you can maintain the confidence level after the guy accepted and you go on a date....
if you think, the main thing is to ask out somebody, and after that it will be the traditional roles, then dont do it...... See, if you ask out a guy, he thinks you are confident and can lead and he will expect this from you....... so if he sees, that you had a courage to ask him out, but your behaviour after that is not confident and couragoues, then he will not respect you, because your behaviour is not consistent..... that is a situation which ends with confusion or fwb
I dont think you should go only with somebody, who is truly interested....... they dont know you, so even if they are just semi-interested in you at first, your character, interesting ideas, your personality may win them over...... again, confidence......
the bad thing is, that there is a double standard unfortunately: if a man chases you and does everything to win you - he is a romantic...... if a girl does the same - she is labelled as desperate lunatic
man brag about how many girls they had sex with (which is easy) girls brag about how many man has fallen for them and doing romantic things for her (which is hard and longer term)........ but hey, this mindset will not disapper in a few years, it was a norm for centuries, just a last 50 or so years it is changing....... slowly, but surely🙂 so girls, dont give up, and pave the way for future generations of girls 🙂
If they want to ask, why not?click to expand
Definitely a good message to put out and spread but just as much in terms of expectations. Just as much as the girls asking guys out shouldn't expect you shouldn't expect those girls to follow your advice. I think it's good advice. But it comes back to my point of coddling women. How will we ever learn if we never fall. Instead we are reduced to be forever fearful of everything and anything.
I'm not saying it won't have unforeseen repercussions but neither should we encourage women to be meek and fearful of getting what they want. Yes, couple that with realism of rejection. But saying women "shouldn't" ask guys out for fear of rejection doesn't change or help current situations in anyway.
Reason why this site is so popular with relationship advice. People will always ask for advice but sometimes it takes a good burn before people truly learn and maybe that's what they need.
Maybe this constant sheltering and protecting is why women keep falling into the same patterns because they never learn from their mistakes because they were never truly burned because they jump ship before they could.
I'm not saying it won't have unforeseen repercussions but neither should we encourage women to be meek and fearful of getting what they want. Yes, couple that with realism of rejection. But saying women "shouldn't" ask guys out for fear of rejection doesn't change or help current situations in anyway.
Reason why this site is so popular with relationship advice. People will always ask for advice but sometimes it takes a good burn before people truly learn and maybe that's what they need.
Maybe this constant sheltering and protecting is why women keep falling into the same patterns because they never learn from their mistakes because they were never truly burned because they jump ship before they could.
Xtina said: " But saying women "shouldn't" ask guys out for fear of rejection doesn't change or help current situations in anyway."
I know, what you mean, I am just saying, that asking out a guy is easy, fear of rejection is nothing in comparison with if the guy accepts (for sex or for why not, etc)...... and to behave accordingly afterwards......
So my take:
1. ask the guy out, if you really like him and you are sure you will not fall on meekly waiting afterwards
2. dont ask him out, if you know you are going to question his moves/not moves (if you have a personality, like this)
3. if you like him, and he doesnt seem interested enough, ask him out and gradually win him over with your personality
4. if its mutual, ask him out, and you will see, but dont get afterwards to "girly mode"
in my opinion again (just my opinion, but supported by observations), asking out somebody is not about refusal but the acceptance....
if the girl would think: I asked him out, mission accomplished, he said yes, win! ..... then it may cause a headache and heartache.....
I know, what you mean, I am just saying, that asking out a guy is easy, fear of rejection is nothing in comparison with if the guy accepts (for sex or for why not, etc)...... and to behave accordingly afterwards......
So my take:
1. ask the guy out, if you really like him and you are sure you will not fall on meekly waiting afterwards
2. dont ask him out, if you know you are going to question his moves/not moves (if you have a personality, like this)
3. if you like him, and he doesnt seem interested enough, ask him out and gradually win him over with your personality
4. if its mutual, ask him out, and you will see, but dont get afterwards to "girly mode"
in my opinion again (just my opinion, but supported by observations), asking out somebody is not about refusal but the acceptance....
if the girl would think: I asked him out, mission accomplished, he said yes, win! ..... then it may cause a headache and heartache.....
Posted by Pandora101I love how you further elaborate and she agrees wholeheartedly, but she gets cunty with me about it.
why not? because of expectations, you ask him out and if he accepts, then you go back to "girl" mindset and want the man to pursue..... which is fine, if you dont get to a "meekly waiting what he would do", which is the core of the problems presented here by various posters........ so, ask him out, if you can handle NOT THE REFUSAL, BUT THE ACCEPTANCE 🙂 that is a hard thing🙂 but if there is a mutual attraction, it will flow, so no headache from this.......... asking him out is easy, but handle the aftermatch is when the headache may come in...... so the main thing is, not that you ask him out, but if you can handle his acceptance and act on it and dont loose yourself afterwards
Butthurt city up in heeere. Talk about missing the point. *cough*
This is what the issue was with the video. The chick in that video has her head so far up her ass, she doesn't get it. Like I said, the point she makes is fine, nothing wrong with the concept generally, but it really does depend on the individual and the situation. We have so many emotionally retarded people out there that I really would not recommend some bothering asking the guy out. They can do it, but it's just gonna be a trainwreck.
Yeah, it's sad when women are scared to ask first because of societal norms. They shouldn't feel that way. But at the same time, I can think some individuals who really should just... not. Mostly for their sake. It's not about sheltering or learning, these people are just serial fuck ups in dating and should just stick to "traditional" because they never learn or their tendencies just never change. THEY were sheltered because they just cannot grasp how reality works in dating, much like seems to be the case with the OP in her immature reaction.
I think the sooner we get away from all the ridiculous myths in dating that are beaten into women's heads, the higher probability we'll have for women asking first and not being preyed upon because of that. Same applies to how some react in these situations, much like you've mentioned. Women's behavior when dating is also something perpetuated by a lot of myths- aka the "romantic comedy" out look on dating.
Posted by Pandora101Maybe the bullet points will help her better understand...
Xtina said: " But saying women "shouldn't" ask guys out for fear of rejection doesn't change or help current situations in anyway."
I know, what you mean, I am just saying, that asking out a guy is easy, fear of rejection is nothing in comparison with if the guy accepts (for sex or for why not, etc)...... and to behave accordingly afterwards......
So my take:
1. ask the guy out, if you really like him and you are sure you will not fall on meekly waiting afterwards
2. dont ask him out, if you know you are going to question his moves/not moves (if you have a personality, like this)
3. if you like him, and he doesnt seem interested enough, ask him out and gradually win him over with your personality
4. if its mutual, ask him out, and you will see, but dont get afterwards to "girly mode"
in my opinion again (just my opinion, but supported by observations), asking out somebody is not about refusal but the acceptance....
if the girl would think: I asked him out, mission accomplished, he said yes, win! ..... then it may cause a headache and heartache.....
Posted by rockyroadicecreamOoooo... Ouch... BuuurrnnnPosted by Pandora101Maybe the bullet points will help her better understand...
Xtina said: " But saying women "shouldn't" ask guys out for fear of rejection doesn't change or help current situations in anyway."
I know, what you mean, I am just saying, that asking out a guy is easy, fear of rejection is nothing in comparison with if the guy accepts (for sex or for why not, etc)...... and to behave accordingly afterwards......
So my take:
1. ask the guy out, if you really like him and you are sure you will not fall on meekly waiting afterwards
2. dont ask him out, if you know you are going to question his moves/not moves (if you have a personality, like this)
3. if you like him, and he doesnt seem interested enough, ask him out and gradually win him over with your personality
4. if its mutual, ask him out, and you will see, but dont get afterwards to "girly mode"
in my opinion again (just my opinion, but supported by observations), asking out somebody is not about refusal but the acceptance....
if the girl would think: I asked him out, mission accomplished, he said yes, win! ..... then it may cause a headache and heartache.....
click to expand
Posted by Pandora101Like I said. Nice idea but you'll be the ones fighting the up hill battle of you think you can change the way people are or tell them how they should do things.
Xtina said: " But saying women "shouldn't" ask guys out for fear of rejection doesn't change or help current situations in anyway."
I know, what you mean, I am just saying, that asking out a guy is easy, fear of rejection is nothing in comparison with if the guy accepts (for sex or for why not, etc)...... and to behave accordingly afterwards......
So my take:
1. ask the guy out, if you really like him and you are sure you will not fall on meekly waiting afterwards
2. dont ask him out, if you know you are going to question his moves/not moves (if you have a personality, like this)
3. if you like him, and he doesnt seem interested enough, ask him out and gradually win him over with your personality
4. if its mutual, ask him out, and you will see, but dont get afterwards to "girly mode"
in my opinion again (just my opinion, but supported by observations), asking out somebody is not about refusal but the acceptance....
if the girl would think: I asked him out, mission accomplished, he said yes, win! ..... then it may cause a headache and heartache.....
In a perfect world everyone would be understanding and accepting... But they're not and we don't live in a perfect world. So instead of trying to control the actions of individuals like has been done and failed for so long as of recent let's find new solutions instead of tired and cliched ones 🙂
Posted by rockyroadicecreamOk since you begged and asked so nicely 🙂Posted by Pandora101I love how you further elaborate and she agrees wholeheartedly, but she gets cunty with me about it.
why not? because of expectations, you ask him out and if he accepts, then you go back to "girl" mindset and want the man to pursue..... which is fine, if you dont get to a "meekly waiting what he would do", which is the core of the problems presented here by various posters........ so, ask him out, if you can handle NOT THE REFUSAL, BUT THE ACCEPTANCE 🙂 that is a hard thing🙂 but if there is a mutual attraction, it will flow, so no headache from this.......... asking him out is easy, but handle the aftermatch is when the headache may come in...... so the main thing is, not that you ask him out, but if you can handle his acceptance and act on it and dont loose yourself afterwards
Butthurt city up in heeere. Talk about missing the point. *cough*
This is what the issue was with the video. The chick in that video has her head so far up her ass, she doesn't get it. Like I said, the point she makes is fine, nothing wrong with the concept generally, but it really does depend on the individual and the situation. We have so many emotionally retarded people out there that I really would not recommend some bothering asking the guy out. They can do it, but it's just gonna be a trainwreck.
Yeah, it's sad when women are scared to ask first because of societal norms. They shouldn't feel that way. But at the same time, I can think some individuals who really should just... not. Mostly for their sake. It's not about sheltering or learning, these people are just serial fuck ups in dating and should just stick to "traditional" because they never learn or their tendencies just never change. THEY were sheltered because they just cannot grasp how reality works in dating, much like seems to be the case with the OP in her immature reaction.
I think the sooner we get away from all the ridiculous myths in dating that are beaten into women's heads, the higher probability we'll have for women asking first and not being preyed upon because of that. Same applies to how some react in these situations, much like you've mentioned. Women's behavior when dating is also something perpetuated by a lot of myths- aka the "romantic comedy" out look on dating.click to expand
It's hard to take someone so hateful and bitter seriously.
Just being honest. I personally think you're better than that but I didn't want to tell you what to do. I know you won't listen anyway.
Posted by busyeyes88Well I don't mean it as an absolute but as an option or alternative avenue. I don't mean it as in a dogmatic sense but something to consider when starting a relationship.
No!!! I do not agree....
It's a man's role as far as I am concerned... But each to their own!!!
Posted by xtinaAnd I'll admit I was being kPosted by rockyroadicecreamOk since you begged and asked so nicely 🙂Posted by Pandora101I love how you further elaborate and she agrees wholeheartedly, but she gets cunty with me about it.
why not? because of expectations, you ask him out and if he accepts, then you go back to "girl" mindset and want the man to pursue..... which is fine, if you dont get to a "meekly waiting what he would do", which is the core of the problems presented here by various posters........ so, ask him out, if you can handle NOT THE REFUSAL, BUT THE ACCEPTANCE 🙂 that is a hard thing🙂 but if there is a mutual attraction, it will flow, so no headache from this.......... asking him out is easy, but handle the aftermatch is when the headache may come in...... so the main thing is, not that you ask him out, but if you can handle his acceptance and act on it and dont loose yourself afterwards
Butthurt city up in heeere. Talk about missing the point. *cough*
This is what the issue was with the video. The chick in that video has her head so far up her ass, she doesn't get it. Like I said, the point she makes is fine, nothing wrong with the concept generally, but it really does depend on the individual and the situation. We have so many emotionally retarded people out there that I really would not recommend some bothering asking the guy out. They can do it, but it's just gonna be a trainwreck.
Yeah, it's sad when women are scared to ask first because of societal norms. They shouldn't feel that way. But at the same time, I can think some individuals who really should just... not. Mostly for their sake. It's not about sheltering or learning, these people are just serial fuck ups in dating and should just stick to "traditional" because they never learn or their tendencies just never change. THEY were sheltered because they just cannot grasp how reality works in dating, much like seems to be the case with the OP in her immature reaction.
I think the sooner we get away from all the ridiculous myths in dating that are beaten into women's heads, the higher probability we'll have for women asking first and not being preyed upon because of that. Same applies to how some react in these situations, much like you've mentioned. Women's behavior when dating is also something perpetuated by a lot of myths- aka the "romantic comedy" out look on dating.
It's hard to take someone so hateful and bitter seriously.
Just being honest. I personally think you're better than that but I didn't want to tell you what to do. I know you won't listen anyway.
click to expand
And I'll admit I was being a bitch.
I'm usually not that way with girls but I can see why you like it.
It's fun 🙂
I'm usually not that way with girls but I can see why you like it.
It's fun 🙂
Posted by busyeyes88Busy, a passive man is a jack-pot for some women, and its right for them.... as an active woman is a jack-pot for a passive man....... they can be very happy together, she wearing the trausers, he listening to every command.... maybe not healthy, but quite common and they are happy for like a lifetime.... true stories in my family and surroundings..... sometimes I envy them, you know? 🙂Posted by xtinaThere's lots of women who come to these forums complaining about their situation re men that they have been "chasing" and that has not been working...Posted by busyeyes88Well I don't mean it as an absolute but as an option or alternative avenue. I don't mean it as in a dogmatic sense but something to consider when starting a relationship.
No!!! I do not agree....
It's a man's role as far as I am concerned... But each to their own!!!
If a woman starts in this way, imo, then she will have to be pursuing him constantly... Don't expect him to suddenly switch into 'hunt" mode when the woman decides to turn into a "female" again...
This has always been a man's role and only very passive men will let a woman chase them... A passive man imo, is bad news all round...click to expand
Don't get me wrong Rocky. I use to admire and respect you. I use to look forward to reading your tirades and think "wow she's a bad ass". And some senses I still do. But something in you seems different. Or maybe I've just changed.
It's not just you but a lot of people seem to be that way now on DXP and it's sad.
Call it what you want but I'm just being honest.
It's not just you but a lot of people seem to be that way now on DXP and it's sad.
Call it what you want but I'm just being honest.
xtina said: "In a perfect world everyone would be understanding and accepting.."
are we still in the " why girls should ask guys out" thread? 🙂
I am not sure, that we are talking about the same thing🙂 Accepting not the rejection, but the acceptance of the man if you ask them out....
you seem to think, the main thing is to encourage woman to ask the guy out....... and I am telling, that that is not the main thing, it is easy, but what follows afterwards, is not easy......... so dont do it, if your are not sure, you can handle the acceptance from the man ..
rejection is really not the worst part of the process...........
Or maybe you are saying the same thing, that its irrelevant, who is asking who out, because the aftermatch is what is counts....... which I agree...... but, you see - if the man asks out, then you expect him to pursue you after the date...... if a woman asks out, then a man will expect her to take a lead....
not always, obviously...... sometimes you ask the man out, and he will take the lead afterwards..... it happens very often........ but very often also happens, that a girl is left confused and with fwb situation, because she didnt follow throu her initial display of her personality
are we still in the " why girls should ask guys out" thread? 🙂
I am not sure, that we are talking about the same thing🙂 Accepting not the rejection, but the acceptance of the man if you ask them out....
you seem to think, the main thing is to encourage woman to ask the guy out....... and I am telling, that that is not the main thing, it is easy, but what follows afterwards, is not easy......... so dont do it, if your are not sure, you can handle the acceptance from the man ..
rejection is really not the worst part of the process...........
Or maybe you are saying the same thing, that its irrelevant, who is asking who out, because the aftermatch is what is counts....... which I agree...... but, you see - if the man asks out, then you expect him to pursue you after the date...... if a woman asks out, then a man will expect her to take a lead....
not always, obviously...... sometimes you ask the man out, and he will take the lead afterwards..... it happens very often........ but very often also happens, that a girl is left confused and with fwb situation, because she didnt follow throu her initial display of her personality
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Narcissist......I had to leave him or I would have lost myself. Im hurt to the core, how do you heal?? I love him with all of who I am and who he was turning me to be and it still was never enough.
My dad is a Leo ... I watched my step mom love him to death and he still cheated later on. I was his 10th child. At one point they were so in love... She went crazy and cut her hair and had a nervous breakdown over my dad in the end. What scares me the mo
Alright.. I met this man on an online dating site the first of October. He was seemingly taken by me from the start. We were up late one night chatting... and it was amazing. Things have been a little complicated and we just met face to face for the
I have a lot of anger. As of late, I have been losing more and more control of myself. I make mean comments about people who I find irritating, but I seem to find EVERYONE irritating. I made a vow the other day, "no more talking badly about people behind
IS THIS REAL LIFE? ... is what I was thinking the whole time I heard this story being told. A friend of my brothers, just.found out, that his wife was sleeping with his sister's husband. I guess both the brother has had suspicion that something wa
Ok...so admittedly, I've always been fascinated by people living the "lifestyle". Whether it was an open relationship, don't ask...don't tell...because we know one or both of us are cheating, swinging, etc. I've never had a threesome...I know, I know...