@Herself
13 Years
I may have hurt a scorpio
How to Reconcile with a Scorpio After an Offense
Scorpios value honesty and emotional connection. To repair the situation, acknowledge their feelings, apologize sincerely, and give them space if needed. Open communication and patience are key to rebuilding trust after an unintended hurt.
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Posted by Herself
and some concerns I had that he may have taken as an insult.
Details.
Posted by Rabbit
You didn't say he had a little weenie, did you?
OP is a Virgo. That one was a Libra.
She said it was unintentional. I think telling a man how small he is would only be intentional.
She probably blabbered smthg Virgo style without realizing what she said. We are Gemini's cousins after all.
That's why I asked.
No, I didn't say anything about his penis. No complaints about that or anything else as far as the actual act is concerned. In fact, he got more intense than I expected the last time. That's what sparked this.
He just said some things during it that I didn't expect and don't know how to process. So, I questioned if we were on the same page. Also said something along the lines of feeling like shit for days after because the only time he seems to be able to open up and "communicate" is in the bedroom and I'm not sure why someone would say those things in the bedroom and not outside the bedroom. Ugh
Posted by Herself
because the only time he seems to be able to open up and "communicate" is in the bedroom
They aren't really verbal so that statement makes sense. All about expression, not lack of feelings thereof.
Posted by Rabbit
Did he say "I love you" while in the process of?
Yeah, that would freak a Leo Moon off. Come on, man..channel the gift I gave you.
It's going to take 10 pages and a few sentences each to figure out what the drama is.
Yes, I'm Leo moon. He's virgo moon.
No, he didn't say he loves me. It was more along the lines of how every inch of me was made for him and how perfectly we fit together, the world around us shatters when he's inside me, etc... Which is a far cry from the usual dirty talk we usually engage in during.
I really just want to know if and how to fix this if I hurt him.
Posted by Herself
Yes, I'm Leo moon. He's virgo moon.No, he didn't say he loves me. It was more along the lines of how every inch of me was made for him and how perfectly we fit together, the world around us shatters when he's inside me, etc... Which is a far cry from the usual dirty talk we usually engage in during.
So that's a bad thing..because?
What did you tell him about it?
Are you guys together? If so..how did he disappear for 2 weeks without you getting in touch with him?
Posted by Rabbit
It's hard for a Scorpio to separate the verbal from the physical when it comes to feelings and sex.
That's why I brought it up to him a few days after. Idk where his head is at. I never know. He's a wall most of the time.
Or a false story
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Didn't think what he said or our dynamic was important. If I hurt him, I want to know if it can be fixed. I assume I hurt him because he's gone silent.
Nothing false here.
Posted by Herself
Yes, I'm Leo moon. He's virgo moon.No, he didn't say he loves me. It was more along the lines of how every inch of me was made for him and how perfectly we fit together, the world around us shatters when he's inside me, etc... Which is a far cry from the usual dirty talk we usually engage in during.
I'm not sure what's more emo here, your initial reaction to his heartfelt dirty talk or his reaction to your reaction. I don't see what the fuss is about either way.
Posted by Herself
Yes, I'm Leo moon. He's virgo moon.No, he didn't say he loves me. It was more along the lines of how every inch of me was made for him and how perfectly we fit together, the world around us shatters when he's inside me, etc... Which is a far cry from the usual dirty talk we usually engage in during.
You have a problem processing this? Omg, that's pure poetry of the heart! I would have melted in a puddle of emotional bliss.
Posted by Rabbit
It's hard for a Scorpio to separate the verbal from the physical when it comes to feelings and sex.That's why I brought it up to him a few days after. Idk where his head is at. I never know. He's a wall most of the time.
Is this a FWB?
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I'm not sure. I'm somewhat naive in this department.
We were friends. I fell for him. Told him and he bolted. 8 months later he contacted me and apologized (100x). Said he'd never leave again and he's here as long as I want him. That was in February. When we see each other we end up "upstairs" and after the last time, I wanted to settle if it was fwb or what. He knows it's more for me than that.
Posted by Herself
I really just want to know if and how to fix this if I hurt him.
He obviously feels something emotionally deep for you and that's when he felt comfortable expressing it, because for water signs, sex and love are usually tightly intertwined. Question: are you an item or FWB? Do you have feelings for him or are you just enjoying the sex for the sake of sex? The answers to these questions will determine how you might go about fixing it with him.
Posted by Herself
Yes, I'm Leo moon. He's virgo moon.No, he didn't say he loves me. It was more along the lines of how every inch of me was made for him and how perfectly we fit together, the world around us shatters when he's inside me, etc... Which is a far cry from the usual dirty talk we usually engage in during.
You have a problem processing this? Omg, that's pure poetry of the heart! I would have melted in a puddle of emotional bliss.
click to expand
Hate to admit it, but I do. I didn't want to be in that puddle of bliss if it was some kind of guy line or something.
Posted by Herself
Yes, I'm Leo moon. He's virgo moon.No, he didn't say he loves me. It was more along the lines of how every inch of me was made for him and how perfectly we fit together, the world around us shatters when he's inside me, etc... Which is a far cry from the usual dirty talk we usually engage in during.
So that's a bad thing..because?
What did you tell him about it?
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Yeah, why is this a bad thing again—??
lockquote>Posted by Herself
the only time he seems to be able to open up and "communicate" is in the bedroom and I'm not sure why someone would say those things in the bedroom and not outside the bedroom. Ugh
No, he didn't say he loves me. It was more along the lines of how every inch of me was made for him and how perfectly we fit together, the world around us shatters when he's inside me, etc...
click to expand
So you'd like him to say this ^^^over dinner in a restaurant?
Posted by HerselfWhen we see each other we end up "upstairs" and after the last time, I wanted to settle if it was fwb or what. He knows it's more for me than that.
So why do you keep going upstairs with him without finding out FIRST where you stand with him?
This isn't making sense at all..and I knew that going in.
Posted by Rabbit
It's hard for a Scorpio to separate the verbal from the physical when it comes to feelings and sex.That's why I brought it up to him a few days after. Idk where his head is at. I never know. He's a wall most of the time.
Is this a FWB?
I'm not sure. I'm somewhat naive in this department.
We were friends. I fell for him. Told him and he bolted. 8 months later he contacted me and apologized (100x). Said he'd never leave again and he's here as long as I want him. That was in February. When we see each other we end up "upstairs" and after the last time, I wanted to settle if it was fwb or what. He knows it's more for me than that.
Please disregard anything LIB is about to say about FWB.. Please. Just ignore her.
My take on this:
You have feelings for him.
You think he has feelings for you.
He won't come out and say it, but lets hints out while in bed.Is this the jist of it?
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You up for fucking with me today are ya?
That's why I brought it up to him a few days after. Idk where his head is at. I never know. He's a wall most of the time.
Yet you keep going upstairs to fuck him.
Clearly that doesn't make you feel good..
Posted by Rabbit
It's hard for a Scorpio to separate the verbal from the physical when it comes to feelings and sex.That's why I brought it up to him a few days after. Idk where his head is at. I never know. He's a wall most of the time.
Is this a FWB?
I'm not sure. I'm somewhat naive in this department.
We were friends. I fell for him. Told him and he bolted. 8 months later he contacted me and apologized (100x). Said he'd never leave again and he's here as long as I want him. That was in February. When we see each other we end up "upstairs" and after the last time, I wanted to settle if it was fwb or what. He knows it's more for me than that.
Please disregard anything LIB is about to say about FWB.. Please. Just ignore her.
My take on this:
You have feelings for him.
You think he has feelings for you.
He won't come out and say it, but lets hints out while in bed.Is this the jist of it?
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That's the jist.. Even with the protecting me stuff. Wtf is that? Protect me from what— I just don't get it. I don't get him. Never have. I just know I want to clean his house and cook him food and wash him.
I know it took him a very long time to tell me he trusts me with things he wants to try in the bedroom (he's kinky but I'm 10x kinkier) and I don't take any of that for granted. However, I still don't know for sure what's in his head (or heart). If it's just sex for him, I want to know. And yes, I told him that. Ugh
Beat me, slap me, call me dirty names.
Tell him anything else uttered other than those roads kills your mojo. That'll fix it.
typo - words
Off topic -
How would I make DXPNET.COM better? - Allow the user to make edits. Gee!
That's why I brought it up to him a few days after. Idk where his head is at. I never know. He's a wall most of the time.
Yet you keep going upstairs to fuck him.
Clearly that doesn't make you feel good..
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Exactly. Which is why I brought it all up a few days after the last time. I think it upset or hurt him that I said I feel like shit driving home and for days after.
If I look at it from his pov... We had a great night out and in private. He "opened up" by saying things he hasn't before.. And I go and tell him it made me feel like shit.
So, how do I fix it? Lol
You should focus less on the fix part and more on understanding what's going on here. At least for now. You're focused on fixing "it" without knowing what "it" is going on between you too.
I'm not a Scorpio Man so I don't know exactly but I think you're over analyzing and driving yourself insane. Do you feel he's into you? Where is the doubt in your mind exactly? Because he won't say come out and say it?
you two*
won't come out and say it*
Posted by Rabbit
I'm guessing I'm not understanding why it "made you feel like shit"...I understand it may have been unexpected, but most women would love that kind of expression from a man...instead of the typical "lets get this done so I can watch the end of the race" kind of pillow talk.
Because she cannot pinpoint if he's into her or said that to run game on her and keep fucking her.
Posted by Herself
Yes, I'm Leo moon. He's virgo moon.No, he didn't say he loves me. It was more along the lines of how every inch of me was made for him and how perfectly we fit together, the world around us shatters when he's inside me, etc... Which is a far cry from the usual dirty talk we usually engage in during.
You have a problem processing this? Omg, that's pure poetry of the heart! I would have melted in a puddle of emotional bliss.
Hate to admit it, but I do. I didn't want to be in that puddle of bliss if it was some kind of guy line or something.
click to expand
Most water signs don't use that kind of emotion as a line. We'll find other ways to hook, line and sink someone but emotions are kept for those we have special feels for. Yes, water signs can manipulate, if we want, but we know enough about whoever the target is to know what buttons to push and still keep the emotions out of it. By questioning him about the authenticity of his feelings you basically insulted him. Imagine telling someone an honest part of your heart and they look at you suspiciously, and question if it was a line or something.
Posted by Rabbit
Does not compute.I don't express feelings to simply get sex.
That's what dinner and drinks is for.
I don't think he's playing her but she is keeping some details back and it pisses my analytical Virgo Sun off.
If I look at it from his pov... We had a great night out and in private. He "opened up" by saying things he hasn't before.. And I go and tell him it made me feel like shit.
So, how do I fix it? Lol
Tell him WHY you feel like shit. Tell him what it is you want from him. If he takes off again....fine, you've saved yourself wasted time this time around. You need to stop depending on him to make you feel complete. Get your answers....if they aren't the answers you seek, move on and find the guy who isn't scared of his own shadow. He's dragging you down by closing you out.
Posted by MoonArtist
Imagine telling someone an honest part of your heart and they look at you suspiciously, and question if it was a line or something.
In all honesty, that's what Scorpios do with people all the time.
Posted by Rabbit
Does not compute.I don't express feelings to simply get sex.
That's what dinner and drinks is for.
I don't think he's playing her but she is keeping some details back and it pisses my analytical Virgo Sun off.
click to expand
Profile...this guy's been stringing her along for quite some time. She's allowing him to.
Posted by Herself
Yes, I'm Leo moon. He's virgo moon.No, he didn't say he loves me. It was more along the lines of how every inch of me was made for him and how perfectly we fit together, the world around us shatters when he's inside me, etc... Which is a far cry from the usual dirty talk we usually engage in during.
You have a problem processing this? Omg, that's pure poetry of the heart! I would have melted in a puddle of emotional bliss.
Hate to admit it, but I do. I didn't want to be in that puddle of bliss if it was some kind of guy line or something.
Most water signs don't use that kind of emotion as a line. We'll find other ways to hook, line and sink someone but emotions are kept for those we have special feels for. Yes, water signs can manipulate, if we want, but we know enough about whoever the target is to know what buttons to push and still keep the emotions out of it. By questioning him about the authenticity of his feelings you basically insulted him. Imagine telling someone an honest part of your heart and they look at you suspiciously, and question if it was a line or something.
click to expand
I have no problem admitting if I screwed up. But, it's kind of hard to clear the air when he's gone silent.
Posted by Rabbit
Does not compute.I don't express feelings to simply get sex.
That's what dinner and drinks is for.
I don't think he's playing her but she is keeping some details back and it pisses my analytical Virgo Sun off.
click to expand
What details do you need to know? I'm not entirely comfortable sharing such personal things but I'm not hiding anything either.
Posted by Rabbit
Does not compute.I don't express feelings to simply get sex.
That's what dinner and drinks is for.
I don't think he's playing her but she is keeping some details back and it pisses my analytical Virgo Sun off.
Profile...this guy's been stringing her along for quite some time. She's allowing him to.
click to expand
I was just going through her March posts.
Posted by Herself
Yes, I'm Leo moon. He's virgo moon.No, he didn't say he loves me. It was more along the lines of how every inch of me was made for him and how perfectly we fit together, the world around us shatters when he's inside me, etc... Which is a far cry from the usual dirty talk we usually engage in during.
You have a problem processing this? Omg, that's pure poetry of the heart! I would have melted in a puddle of emotional bliss.
Hate to admit it, but I do. I didn't want to be in that puddle of bliss if it was some kind of guy line or something.
Most water signs don't use that kind of emotion as a line. We'll find other ways to hook, line and sink someone but emotions are kept for those we have special feels for. Yes, water signs can manipulate, if we want, but we know enough about whoever the target is to know what buttons to push and still keep the emotions out of it. By questioning him about the authenticity of his feelings you basically insulted him. Imagine telling someone an honest part of your heart and they look at you suspiciously, and question if it was a line or something.
My god...I agree with you for once, you drunk... 😄
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Oh stop it, you're going to make me blush! Besides, you agree with me all the time. Mostly you just like to pretend you don't, you whiskey sucking rabble rowser.
Posted by MoonArtist
Imagine telling someone an honest part of your heart and they look at you suspiciously, and question if it was a line or something.In all honesty, that's what Scorpios do with people all the time.
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No they don't. They just look at you blankly and pretend you didn't say a thing if what you said made them uncomfortable.
I have no problem admitting if I screwed up. But, it's kind of hard to clear the air when he's gone silent.
Well...that's what all of your previous posts about this guy is about. Him ripping your heart out because you shared your feelings and he bolted. So now, you thought you'd be quiet and not push him out of fear of him bolting again, and it resulting in you resenting him and his bedroom rantings, as a result your words "I feel like shit" blurted out. So now HE'S HURT? Are you a god damn bandaid? C'mon...lay your cards on the table with this guy, get your answers. Let him know you need communication
Well, is this the guy you talked about back in March? If so, how long has this been going on? Did he ever express anything in or outside the bedroom before? Is he doing this just in the recent month? Do you guys go out at all? Has this demeanor changed or he has been a wall throughout..is he opening up to you?
Off the top of my head.
Posted by MoonArtist
Imagine telling someone an honest part of your heart and they look at you suspiciously, and question if it was a line or something.In all honesty, that's what Scorpios do with people all the time.
No they don't. They just look at you blankly and pretend you didn't say a thing if what you said made them uncomfortable.
click to expand
That too.
Posted by Herself
Yes, I'm Leo moon. He's virgo moon.No, he didn't say he loves me. It was more along the lines of how every inch of me was made for him and how perfectly we fit together, the world around us shatters when he's inside me, etc... Which is a far cry from the usual dirty talk we usually engage in during.
You have a problem processing this? Omg, that's pure poetry of the heart! I would have melted in a puddle of emotional bliss.
Hate to admit it, but I do. I didn't want to be in that puddle of bliss if it was some kind of guy line or something.
Most water signs don't use that kind of emotion as a line. We'll find other ways to hook, line and sink someone but emotions are kept for those we have special feels for. Yes, water signs can manipulate, if we want, but we know enough about whoever the target is to know what buttons to push and still keep the emotions out of it. By questioning him about the authenticity of his feelings you basically insulted him. Imagine telling someone an honest part of your heart and they look at you suspiciously, and question if it was a line or something.
I have no problem admitting if I screwed up. But, it's kind of hard to clear the air when he's gone silent.
click to expand
And silent he will remain until you clear the air. It's simple. Start with apologizing for how you treated his honesty. Let him know how you feel. You invalidated his feelings for you and made HIM feel like he's being used for sex.
If he remains silent.......WALK AWAY AND DON'T LOOK BACK.
If you do look back and he tempts you back in, you only have yourself to blame.
Posted by Damnata
Well, is this the guy you talked about back in March? If so, how long has this been going on? Did he ever express anything in or outside the bedroom before? Is he doing this just in the recent month? Do you guys go out at all? Has this demeanor changed or he has been a wall throughout..is he opening up to you?Off the top of my head.
Same guy. I've known him for a few years as friends. Last year I told him exactly how I felt about him, that's when he left. That was last may/June. Feb he contacted me. Apologized. Said how much he missed me. How he's a different better place now. On and on...
I told him I can't be just friends with him. He said "ok" and that was the extent at that point. He's not much of a talker.
Yes, we go out. Yes, he's said a few things here and there, mostly a wall though.
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Completely unintentional. I brought up a certain subject (sex) and some concerns I had that he may have taken as an insult. Now, I am going on two weeks of silent treatment.
Can this be fixed? If so, what approach should I take?