I may have hurt a scorpio (Page 2)

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Damnata
@Damnata
15 Years25,000+ PostsVirgo

Comments: 252 · Posts: 36419 · Topics: 473
When you told him last year how you felt for him, you had sex back then too? When did the sex begin?

Do you go out as friends? Is anything in his attitude, body language when you're outside that tells you he's feeling more? Do you go out with your friends, his etc?

What things here and there?

I don't know, he seems to like keeping it vague and it's making you uncomfortable. He either wants to go with the flow or he's only into fwb and nothing more. If you can't take this, ask him straight up, like LIB suggested.
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Herself
@Herself
12 Years

Comments: 0 · Posts: 319 · Topics: 16
Posted by Damnata
When you told him last year how you felt for him, you had sex back then too? When did the sex begin?

Do you go out as friends? Is anything in his attitude, body language when you're outside that tells you he's feeling more? Do you go out with your friends, his etc?

What things here and there?

I don't know, he seems to like keeping it vague and it's making you uncomfortable. He either wants to go with the flow or he's only into fwb and nothing more. If you can't take this, ask him straight up, like LIB suggested.



We go out with friends, yes.

One out-of-character thing he did was the first night we went out after we started talking again. He gave me a movie moment surprise kiss right out in public on a city street. He's very very private, so that floored me a little.
Another thing is the little thumb ribs on my shoulder. He never did things like that before. I don't know how to read that.. Fwb? More?

I've told him I can't do fwb. It's not me. I've told him I can't be just friends. This time I have been very clear on that. He just says "ok"

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Herself
@Herself
12 Years

Comments: 0 · Posts: 319 · Topics: 16
Posted by Impulsv
Aw I see it's a matter of trust. N before getting together did u hash out the past how fuel the bailed ect.,.
Or was it like nothing ever happened n now the issues are coming up.



We hashed it out for a month. I told him I don't trust him, he said "as long as it takes, I will fix that"
He said a lot. I remained closed off until I saw him.

Just seems like an awful lot to go through just for sex. He can get that anywhere. At the same time, I have no idea if it's more (on his end)

And... Now he's not talking to me at all so who knows
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DMV
@DMV
15 Years25,000+ PostsSagittarius

Comments: 295 · Posts: 28989 · Topics: 654
Posted by Damnata
Posted by DMV
This thread is exactly why virgos go well with scorpios; everybody is vauge with each other, keeps the mystery going.



bwhahah.

what keeps the mystery going keeps the frustration going if both aren't on the same page.
click to expand




yup, seems like no one wants to close the door all the way. no one wants to make something official or end it. Lay 2 cards on the table, change 1 card while someone isnt looking.
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DMV
@DMV
15 Years25,000+ PostsSagittarius

Comments: 295 · Posts: 28989 · Topics: 654
Posted by Herself
Posted by Impulsv
Aw I see it's a matter of trust. N before getting together did u hash out the past how fuel the bailed ect.,.
Or was it like nothing ever happened n now the issues are coming up.



We hashed it out for a month. I told him I don't trust him, he said "as long as it takes, I will fix that"
He said a lot. I remained closed off until I saw him.

Just seems like an awful lot to go through just for sex. He can get that anywhere. At the same time, I have no idea if it's more (on his end)

And... Now he's not talking to me at all so who knows
click to expand




everyone has sex, not everyone has hot sex.
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Damnata
@Damnata
15 Years25,000+ PostsVirgo

Comments: 252 · Posts: 36419 · Topics: 473
Posted by DMV
Posted by Damnata
Posted by DMV
This thread is exactly why virgos go well with scorpios; everybody is vauge with each other, keeps the mystery going.



bwhahah.

what keeps the mystery going keeps the frustration going if both aren't on the same page.



yup, seems like no one wants to close the door all the way. no one wants to make something official or end it. Lay 2 cards on the table, change 1 card while someone isnt looking.
click to expand




I don't know, you can do that as long as you will have no regrets for putting your foot down.

She seems uncomfortable with the dynamic.
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Herself
@Herself
12 Years

Comments: 0 · Posts: 319 · Topics: 16
Posted by DMV
Posted by Damnata
Posted by DMV
This thread is exactly why virgos go well with scorpios; everybody is vauge with each other, keeps the mystery going.



bwhahah.

what keeps the mystery going keeps the frustration going if both aren't on the same page.



yup, seems like no one wants to close the door all the way. no one wants to make something official or end it. Lay 2 cards on the table, change 1 card while someone isnt looking.
click to expand




I was willing to take the risk of going all in. But I'll be damned if I make a fool of myself by asking him to make it "official" if all he wants is sex.

I need to be sure he's on the same page.. Which is what sparked this
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Herself
@Herself
12 Years

Comments: 0 · Posts: 319 · Topics: 16
Posted by DMV
OP, i think he's seeing other people and maybe you are too which is why your both hesitant.

When you guys get ready to ditch your back up plans, things will change and you will leave limbo land. For the good or worse.

I think your scorp will never ditch his back up plan. Your history with each other doesnt support that.



I don't have anyone else or a back up plan. He says he doesn't either (do I believe him?)
I don't fall for people. I don't sleep around. All of this is very new to me. I've only been in one other relationship.
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Herself
@Herself
12 Years

Comments: 0 · Posts: 319 · Topics: 16
Posted by Impulsv
Maybe ur confusing him too cuz u say we go out of as Freind but u won't have sex if only Freinds. But ur are having it.
I'd take it as ok been established we are more than Freinds as we are having sex. Based on ur words.



That was part of our last conversation. I'm well aware of the confusion. That's why I wanted to settle it. Instead, what I wanted to say came out wrong and... The silence.
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LetltB
@LetltB
12 Years5,000+ Posts

Comments: 1 · Posts: 9186 · Topics: 179
Posted by Herself

I was willing to take the risk of going all in. But I'll be damned if I make a fool of myself by asking him to make it "official" if all he wants is sex.

I need to be sure he's on the same page.. Which is what sparked this




Well if that's your attitude, you will get nowhere I guarantee it. Grow some balls, he'll respect that. If you don't get a response, or if he remains silent, grow some self respect and walk or you'll be sulking for another year.
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Herself
@Herself
12 Years

Comments: 0 · Posts: 319 · Topics: 16
Posted by LetltB
Posted by Herself

I was willing to take the risk of going all in. But I'll be damned if I make a fool of myself by asking him to make it "official" if all he wants is sex.

I need to be sure he's on the same page.. Which is what sparked this




Well if that's your attitude, you will get nowhere I guarantee it. Grow some balls, he'll respect that. If you don't get a response, or if he remains silent, grow some self respect and walk or you'll be sulking for another year.
click to expand




That's exactly what I want to do. I want it settled. I just don't want to be the fool.
I don't know how to approach it. I'll grow the balls... Just don't know what exactly to say. Guess i have nothing to lose at this point.
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LilliLou
@LilliLou
12 Years1,000+ PostsScorpio

Comments: 391 · Posts: 3020 · Topics: 28
Posted by CluelessCancer
ARE you DIVORCED or are you just CHEATING?


Posted by Herself
Damn... The more I read on here about bad evil Virgo men. The more I ask myself why I ever wanted a divorce from mine.. He's perfect.. No cheating, works hard, great father, great in bed, funny, always put me first, etc.. I really have nothing bad to say about him. He must be another sign in disguise....

OP- stay clear of married/taken men.. Once a cheat, always a cheat. You won't make anyone change their ways.

click to expand




(?)
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Herself
@Herself
12 Years

Comments: 0 · Posts: 319 · Topics: 16
Posted by LilliLou
Posted by CluelessCancer
ARE you DIVORCED or are you just CHEATING?


Posted by Herself
Damn... The more I read on here about bad evil Virgo men. The more I ask myself why I ever wanted a divorce from mine.. He's perfect.. No cheating, works hard, great father, great in bed, funny, always put me first, etc.. I really have nothing bad to say about him. He must be another sign in disguise....

OP- stay clear of married/taken men.. Once a cheat, always a cheat. You won't make anyone change their ways.



(?)
click to expand




Ignore her. She's a stalker who assumes things about me. Made up some swinger accusation not too long ago.. I just laugh.
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LilliLou
@LilliLou
12 Years1,000+ PostsScorpio

Comments: 391 · Posts: 3020 · Topics: 28
Posted by Herself
Posted by LilliLou
So... your post on your virgo husband was from a long time ago and you are now divorced?

Just so we are all clear as mud.



Yup. I posted a half sarcastic post about someone I was with for 20 years. I never cheated on him. I never even looked at anyone else. My marriage is long over and has no bearing on this situation.
click to expand





Cool, as you were...
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nov13thscorp
@nov13thscorp
13 Years

Comments: 0 · Posts: 499 · Topics: 5
pffft...freaking virgo chicks and their mouths...smh that was some deep shit he said to u, from the heart... and u questioned it?? u say he always has a wall up, he FINALLY opens up and u questioned him??!! He must feel so stupid/embarrassed among other things...dont be shocked if u dont hear from him for months....I dont care if "I" was in love with u, I would avoid at all costs for MONTHS, this poor guys' confidence/ego is freakin crushed.....good luck with that
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LetltB
@LetltB
12 Years5,000+ Posts

Comments: 1 · Posts: 9186 · Topics: 179
Posted by IrresistableScorp
LIB. Honest question. Have you ever had the official talk with someone you've been in a relationship with? I haven't. Just wondering if scorps do the whole we're official convo.



I'm one of these people who is on a gotta know basis. Put it on the table, I don't like guessing games. I have no fear of rejection, and instead fear wasting valuable time and energy. Never had a problem with it. Obviously timing is everything.
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bloodflood
@bloodflood
12 Years500+ Posts

Comments: 19 · Posts: 794 · Topics: 16
i think we (virgos) sometimes don't see that scorpios are more sensitive than we think, just because they usually have a wall around them or are more quiet and passive. i think what he said was sexy, but i also can understand how you question it too.. it's as if you think maybe the connection between you two is just sex. you have to consider though if maybe sex is his medium to communicate what he truly feels about you, both inside and outside the bedroom. s
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Herself
@Herself
12 Years

Comments: 0 · Posts: 319 · Topics: 16
Posted by bloodflood
i think we (virgos) sometimes don't see that scorpios are more sensitive than we think, just because they usually have a wall around them or are more quiet and passive. i think what he said was sexy, but i also can understand how you question it too.. it's as if you think maybe the connection between you two is just sex. you have to consider though if maybe sex is his medium to communicate what he truly feels about you, both inside and outside the bedroom. s



That's what I question.
Not to long ago he said "the sex we have isn't normal. That we can ravage each other then ask what's next. We can turn the mundane in to something extrodinary. That most people build on other things, we build on our desires." I still having no effing clue if that's a good thing or bad thing or why he said it. Smh @ myself
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Herself
@Herself
12 Years

Comments: 0 · Posts: 319 · Topics: 16
Posted by Whatu
Posted by Herself
Posted by bloodflood
i think we (virgos) sometimes don't see that scorpios are more sensitive than we think, just because they usually have a wall around them or are more quiet and passive. i think what he said was sexy, but i also can understand how you question it too.. it's as if you think maybe the connection between you two is just sex. you have to consider though if maybe sex is his medium to communicate what he truly feels about you, both inside and outside the bedroom. s



That's what I question.
Not to long ago he said "the sex we have isn't normal. That we can ravage each other then ask what's next. We can turn the mundane in to something extrodinary. That most people build on other things, we build on our desires." I still having no effing clue if that's a good thing or bad thing or why he said it. Smh @ myself



Are you actually confused about what he said or are you confused/frightened by the way what he said made you feel? It sounds like he was straight up but you on the other hand don't know if you love him or not?
Of course you are training to rationalize it all by putting the spotlight on him, you need to look at how you feel? and if you feel uncomfortable then either you don't love him or you are still really afraid to step over that edge.
click to expand




I'm confused because it was out of character for him to say something like that and if 'building on desires' is actually a thing. Does this building on desires mean it's all about sex?? That's what I'm not comfortable with. I assumed we would build on the things we have in common, which is everything. But what do I know? Apparently not much where men/relationships are concerned.

I know exactly how I feel about him. I don't question that.
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Damnata
@Damnata
15 Years25,000+ PostsVirgo

Comments: 252 · Posts: 36419 · Topics: 473
Let me try this..

You're a Virgo Woman.
Virgo + Woman
Virgo = mercurial sign => words as means of expression
Woman = woman => words as means of expression

Virgo + Woman => words + words => strong emphasis on words. add earth as an element, strong emphasis on words and certainty.

He's a Scorpio Man
Scorpio + Man
Scorpio = Ruled by Pluto and Mars => sex and actions as means of expression
Man = Man => actions as means of expression

Scorpio + Man => Sex and actions and actions => actions. add water as an element, strong emphasis on every other type of emotional expression and possibility as opposed to certainty.

It boils down to different types of expressing emotions.
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kim30
@kim30
11 Years1,000+ PostsCancer

Comments: 20 · Posts: 1771 · Topics: 32
Posted by CluelessCancer
ARE you DIVORCED or are you just CHEATING?


Posted by Herself
Damn... The more I read on here about bad evil Virgo men. The more I ask myself why I ever wanted a divorce from mine.. He's perfect.. No cheating, works hard, great father, great in bed, funny, always put me first, etc.. I really have nothing bad to say about him. He must be another sign in disguise....

OP- stay clear of married/taken men.. Once a cheat, always a cheat. You won't make anyone change their ways.

click to expand


ROFLMAO
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MoonArtist
@MoonArtist
12 Years10,000+ Posts

Comments: 22 · Posts: 11927 · Topics: 87
Posted by Herself
Posted by Whatu
Posted by Herself
Posted by bloodflood
i think we (virgos) sometimes don't see that scorpios are more sensitive than we think, just because they usually have a wall around them or are more quiet and passive. i think what he said was sexy, but i also can understand how you question it too.. it's as if you think maybe the connection between you two is just sex. you have to consider though if maybe sex is his medium to communicate what he truly feels about you, both inside and outside the bedroom. s



That's what I question.
Not to long ago he said "the sex we have isn't normal. That we can ravage each other then ask what's next. We can turn the mundane in to something extrodinary. That most people build on other things, we build on our desires." I still having no effing clue if that's a good thing or bad thing or why he said it. Smh @ myself



Are you actually confused about what he said or are you confused/frightened by the way what he said made you feel? It sounds like he was straight up but you on the other hand don't know if you love him or not?
Of course you are training to rationalize it all by putting the spotlight on him, you need to look at how you feel? and if you feel uncomfortable then either you don't love him or you are still really afraid to step over that edge.



I'm confused because it was out of character for him to say something like that and if 'building on desires' is actually a thing. Does this building on desires mean it's all about sex?? That's what I'm not comfortable with. I assumed we would build on the things we have in common, which is everything. But what do I know? Apparently not much where men/relationships are concerned.

I know exactly how I feel about him. I don't question that.
click to expand




Desires isn't just sexual energy. Desire is and can be the dream world we create inside that we hope for and create in life. When you have two people with shared dreams, shared DESIRES, then you have the potential to stand hand in hand with that person and move forward together in life....sharing DESIRE, or dreams. See?