imoanbackwards
@imoanbackwards
11 Years
Comments: 0 · Posts: 18 · Topics: 2
He texted me Do you hate me?
Well it seems like to me wit virgo's being so honest at times I feel like I am "hated" as well. And us asking us isnt like the love/hate kind. Not as in u want to hurt him. Just as in do u really dislike him for how he is feeling.
Overall it doesnt seem like on the outside he has a reason for u to hate hin. He was honest and he could have just lied and pulled u along. Seems like he still wants to know if u are interested.
My suggestion for IF you are interested in him and wouldnt mind to be in a relationship with him is to respond. Virgo dont like to feel like they're being ignored. At the end of the day just because someone ppl aren't ready doesnt mean they dont like you nor see value in you. It can be some mini goals that he is setting for himself. Which doesnt take long to accomplish and may be ready for his woman to be by his side 🙂
Overall it doesnt seem like on the outside he has a reason for u to hate hin. He was honest and he could have just lied and pulled u along. Seems like he still wants to know if u are interested.
My suggestion for IF you are interested in him and wouldnt mind to be in a relationship with him is to respond. Virgo dont like to feel like they're being ignored. At the end of the day just because someone ppl aren't ready doesnt mean they dont like you nor see value in you. It can be some mini goals that he is setting for himself. Which doesnt take long to accomplish and may be ready for his woman to be by his side 🙂
"Virgo dont like to feel like they're being ignored."
Posted by VirgoCupcake
Well it seems like to me wit virgo's being so honest at times I feel like I am "hated" as well. And us asking us isnt like the love/hate kind. Not as in u want to hurt him. Just as in do u really dislike him for how he is feeling.
Overall it doesnt seem like on the outside he has a reason for u to hate hin. He was honest and he could have just lied and pulled u along. Seems like he still wants to know if u are interested.
My suggestion for IF you are interested in him and wouldnt mind to be in a relationship with him is to respond. Virgo dont like to feel like they're being ignored. At the end of the day just because someone ppl aren't ready doesnt mean they dont like you nor see value in you. It can be some mini goals that he is setting for himself. Which doesnt take long to accomplish and may be ready for his woman to be by his side 🙂
Yea I can see that. I think until I know exactly what to say I wont say anything. I am not trying to purposely ignore him I just dont know how to respond. Its been a long week without him and I dont want to re break up again. I can't be friends or make promises that Ill wait. I sort of feel like if its going to happen then he'll come back when the time is right for him. I meant it when I told him I care for him and I want him to be happy. But now he's gotta let me go. Its what he asked for. Its what I need. If his time is still a good time for me then it will work but if not then it was never meant to happen.
Thank you for your reply! You are so good with advice. You def made me feel and think a little better. I keep in touch with you.
Posted by gemini64
"Virgo dont like to feel like they're being ignored."
He ignored me for 3 days till he finally told me what was up- He should understand when it happens to him lol. But for me, I just dont know what to say. So I shouldn't say anything at all.
Here's some clues ....
1. Virgos don't work on relationships.
You are expected to know what they want ... and then it's up to you make it happen for them, and not ask any questions. If you aren't doing it the way they want - they get pissy.
Keeping in mind that you were never really told, exactly ... just bits and pieces.
Talk about passive/aggressive
2. The Virgo will tell you how you should feel, think, act (eventhough see #1). It's up to you to change yourself to accommodate their wishes.
If you cannot handle that .... then remove him from you, because that's as good as it gets.
I think he expected more grovelling on your part and he sees the silence as you really hating him despite what you said.
Idk
1. He played a game with you and is terribly upset as to why youve gone on with your life instead of chasing him.
2. He aspires you to be his booty call. No time for a relationship, plenty of time for some nookie. Hell charm you sex you and then remind you that he doesnt have time for a relationship.??
3. He realizes he made a mistake. Instead of saying that, he puts the ball in your court for you to reach out to him. For you to put your feelings out first.
either way, hes sounds insecure as fuck.
I put this in your other blog.
1. He played a game with you and is terribly upset as to why youve gone on with your life instead of chasing him.
2. He aspires you to be his booty call. No time for a relationship, plenty of time for some nookie. Hell charm you sex you and then remind you that he doesnt have time for a relationship.??
3. He realizes he made a mistake. Instead of saying that, he puts the ball in your court for you to reach out to him. For you to put your feelings out first.
either way, hes sounds insecure as fuck.
I put this in your other blog.
Posted by P-Angel
Here's some clues ....
1. Virgos don't work on relationships.
You are expected to know what they want ... and then it's up to you make it happen for them, and not ask any questions. If you aren't doing it the way they want - they get pissy.
Keeping in mind that you were never really told, exactly ... just bits and pieces.
Talk about passive/aggressive
2. The Virgo will tell you how you should feel, think, act (eventhough see #1). It's up to you to change yourself to accommodate their wishes.
If you cannot handle that .... then remove him from you, because that's as good as it gets.
Thats exactly how it feels. Thats where I get when people cry about hes being "Hot and cold" or the "back and forth" its not really that its just him wanting me to do what he thinks im expected to do and then when I dont he gets upset. When he gets upset it comes out of no where to me because instead of him telling me what bothers him he waits till the last minute.
Him telling me he wasn't feeling it and that he just wanted to chill- I gave him exactly that. But then he comes around like he didn't mean quite that but that I should of known that. Thanks P Angel - As always I appreciate your words.
Posted by gemini64
"Virgo dont like to feel like they're being ignored."
_—_—_—_—_— yup. I'll ignore someone too fast, but don't like it
Posted by P-Angel
Here's some clues ....
1. Virgos don't work on relationships.
You are expected to know what they want ... and then it's up to you make it happen for them, and not ask any questions. If you aren't doing it the way they want - they get pissy.
Keeping in mind that you were never really told, exactly ... just bits and pieces.
Talk about passive/aggressive
2. The Virgo will tell you how you should feel, think, act (eventhough see #1). It's up to you to change yourself to accommodate their wishes.
If you cannot handle that .... then remove him from you, because that's as good as it gets.
This is so accurate, it's surreal. When you're the one being "molded' by the Virgo, often it's so subtle, you don't even realize what they are doing. I went through this exact scenario. Although I was in the best shape of my life and for my build, thin and incredibly healthy, he still wanted to "perfect" my build. My physician told me if I lost anymore weight, I'd be anorexic because of my frame etc. But Mr. Virgo couldn't get past his vision of what he wanted me to become.
And then the criticisms begin; Virgo's will tell you it's because they care about you. Ya right....it's about them wanted to "perfect you"....despite the fact they are not infallible. However, for each criticism comes a compliment. This is how they keep you thinking that maybe they aren't so bad after all and actually possess a heart. LOL
If they want you, they will be subtle about it and add a few more compliments in their conversation. If ask questions, which I did because I simply wanted to understand why he was doing what he was doing, it's taken as if you are questioning their character...They take it so personal, it's like a mortal sin. If they ask you a question and you respond with an honest answer, even if it's not done in an overbearing emotional fashion, they will turn it on you and reject your opinion. And yes, in some, this is where you get the "pissy" attitude as if you did something to hurt their pride by simply responding to their inquiry. They don't want your honesty. They want you to tell them what they desire to hear.
I've read that male Virgo's like women who are intelligent, can carry a conversation and stand up for their beliefs and self. While that may be true for some VM, my experiences have been the opposite. When you stand up for yourself, they feel threatened. They can no longer manipulate you. And when caught in their game, they run rather than confront you.
Sometimes we all have to learn the hard way. I sure did. Experiences as these make you stronger, wiser and more capable of seeing what's legit in a relationship and what's a total facade.
Sometimes we all have to learn the hard way. I sure did. Experiences as these make you stronger, wiser and more capable of seeing what's legit in a relationship and what's a total facade.
Kinda harsh on the maidens. I dont see my virgo gal as some master manipulator. She cares deeply and if i choose to not take her advice, no bubbles no troubles.
she takes my advice as well, its a cooperative relationship.
she takes my advice as well, its a cooperative relationship.
I've stated so many times in here that there should be a banner on the door to this room .....
People prefect themselves in life, whatever it is they do. You become better, smarter as you practice ... and emotional interactions are included in this.
The Virgo insists on shrugging off having to deal with emotions. They have zero interest in having to deal with feelings.
so guess what? ... if you aren't dealing with something, then you are NOT learning how to cope with it.
With your issue here, and with most (EVERY) threads in the Virgo room .... it's the same shit, different day. The Virgo is absolutely clueless on how to deal with how you feel, and so they don't deal with it ... they just ignore it.
And then expect you to pick up all the pieces and put it all back in order ... while they remain ignorant to any human emotional realities.
And to prove this ... when you are in emotional dire straights concerning your relationship with the Virgo, watch how they have no fucking clue that feelings are an issue. They don't know, because they ignore it, so therefore have never learned how to cope with their partners being human.
Posted by P-Angel
I've stated so many times in here that there should be a banner on the door to this room .....
People prefect themselves in life, whatever it is they do. You become better, smarter as you practice ... and emotional interactions are included in this.
The Virgo insists on shrugging off having to deal with emotions. They have zero interest in having to deal with feelings.
so guess what? ... if you aren't dealing with something, then you are NOT learning how to cope with it.
With your issue here, and with most (EVERY) threads in the Virgo room .... it's the same shit, different day. The Virgo is absolutely clueless on how to deal with how you feel, and so they don't deal with it ... they just ignore it.
And then expect you to pick up all the pieces and put it all back in order ... while they remain ignorant to any human emotional realities.
And to prove this ... when you are in emotional dire straights concerning your relationship with the Virgo, watch how they have no fucking clue that feelings are an issue. They don't know, because they ignore it, so therefore have never learned how to cope with their partners being human.
This would certainly explain why so many VM I've encountered in my life never seem genuinely happy or content. It seems as if "living in the moment" for them is akin to having your wisdom teeth pulled. Yea, they can smile and crack subtle jokes but I've always sensed that they are doing so to cover up their actually feelings. I believe they have very deep feelings but don't know how to understand them. And if they are confused by their own feelings, God know they's can't contemplate anyone else's, especially a woman they might be attracted to.
Everything they complain about begins to make sense once this starts to sink in. For example, one of the biggest complaints they have is that they always feel taken for granted.
Think about that .... of course you would feel that way if you never take action. All you do is try and mold the other person into doing for you, trying to get them to change according to the situation. But, you don't actually ever do it.
If you're not honoring your own words in asking someone else to do something you are not willing to do yourself ... then of course you are going to feel taken, since you never actually presented yourself, you never actually accomplished this task. Trying to control the other persons responses to life isn't presenting yourself.
It's presenting an illusion of what you have in your head ONTO the other person to be you for you.
So, therefore, nobody even knows who the fuck you are, or have ever been, since you've never been real enough to do it yourself .... so how then, are other people suppose to know how to take you?
The Virgo really is their only enemy ... but, their delusion is thick, so they would never be able to believe that. They will always believe others are abusing them.
To be the partner of a Virgo ... you have to wear the pants. And I mean that strongly. I'm not saying in your fantasy of how you have romanced your love life. I'm talking the Boss of everything.
There's no sitting there, trying to do everything he wants you to do (see above), since that is impossible. Instead, the way to deal with Virgo is to reach them for who they are = workers.
Don't give him the lead, the Virgo is the follower, not the leader ... trust me, I've been married to one for over 3 decades. When you read that Virgos are the Service sign?
That means, literally.
If you want this man, who seems to be trying to show you that he's hanging on right there, waiting for you to take him ... take him.
Tell him what the deal is from then on ... the moment you sit there waiting for him, is the day you lost. because (see above) he won't tell you, and will leave your head spinning.
Posted by P-Angel
To be the partner of a Virgo ... you have to wear the pants. And I mean that strongly. I'm not saying in your fantasy of how you have romanced your love life. I'm talking the Boss of everything.
There's no sitting there, trying to do everything he wants you to do (see above), since that is impossible. Instead, the way to deal with Virgo is to reach them for who they are = workers.
Don't give him the lead, the Virgo is the follower, not the leader ... trust me, I've been married to one for over 3 decades. When you read that Virgos are the Service sign?
That means, literally.
If you want this man, who seems to be trying to show you that he's hanging on right there, waiting for you to take him ... take him.
Tell him what the deal is from then on ... the moment you sit there waiting for him, is the day you lost. because (see above) he won't tell you, and will leave your head spinning.
I agree with this
Posted by P-Angel
To be the partner of a Virgo ... you have to wear the pants. And I mean that strongly. I'm not saying in your fantasy of how you have romanced your love life. I'm talking the Boss of everything.
There's no sitting there, trying to do everything he wants you to do (see above), since that is impossible. Instead, the way to deal with Virgo is to reach them for who they are = workers.
Don't give him the lead, the Virgo is the follower, not the leader ... trust me, I've been married to one for over 3 decades. When you read that Virgos are the Service sign?
That means, literally.
If you want this man, who seems to be trying to show you that he's hanging on right there, waiting for you to take him ... take him.
Tell him what the deal is from then on ... the moment you sit there waiting for him, is the day you lost. because (see above) he won't tell you, and will leave your head spinning.
So would you say VM need strong women in their lives? And if so, are they naturally attracted to strong women? I mean women who know who they are, know what they stand for and stand up for themselves?
Posted by gemini64
"Virgo dont like to feel like they're being ignored."
Oh the TOTAL IRONY in your sentence. My experience with Virgo's is that they are the ones who perfected the action of putting someone they supposedly cared about on INFINITE IGNORE.
I've been on Ignore for 4 months now without any explanation or contact. One day everything is peachy king, the next, deafening silence.
Virgo's, especially, Virgo men, are an enigma. What they expect from you they can't deliver themselves. In my world, that's called "hypocrisy."
It is called the "back burner". It is totally and completely annoying. xD I have had it explained to me that when someone isn't in the room with you and you don't see a way to have that happen, you put them on the "back burner" so you can function. Okay, so that makes sense. Nice and logical, to stop the hurting emotionally when there's nothing to prevent the event from occurring which hurts.
The irony is that the absolutely, emotion-blocking firmness and usefulness of this back burner, prevents you from actually going out of your way to stop the event from occurring which hurts. You know, like... picking yourself up to go be with a person. Or setting aside a space of time for them to come to you.
I described my own tactic, which is to text/call/communicate in order to relieve 'some' of the pressure building up from being away, as I have an instinctively clingy nature. I was told that to try this tactic would make it even worse for him, that he then couldn't function.
Phooey.
In this case, it's not so much a purposeful push/pull, but it does come off that way at first until it's been explained. Also in this case, it's in an already-established relationship.
Posted by DraumstafirPosted by gemini64
"Virgo dont like to feel like they're being ignored."
Oh the TOTAL IRONY in your sentence. My experience with Virgo's is that they are the ones who perfected the action of putting someone they supposedly cared about on INFINITE IGNORE.
I've been on Ignore for 4 months now without any explanation or contact. One day everything is peachy king, the next, deafening silence.
Virgo's, especially, Virgo men, are an enigma. What they expect from you they can't deliver themselves. In my world, that's called "hypocrisy."
It is called the "back burner".click to expand
Oh, and, forgot to mention... reaching out DOES get responses. Not reaching out does not encourage him to reach out. In this case it seems more to be 'forgetfulness' because he'll eventually 'remember' (LONG time from now) and ask if everything's alright.
Concerning the OP, hey... go ahead and answer him. Just be honest. And SHORT. Tell him you don't hate him (because you don't) but that you'd like to move on, because you don't like half/semi-relationships. Or whatever wording sounds right to you. Say you need your space, but that hate is not involved. It's honest and practical. And it doesn't give him any window to rekindle a relationship in which you feel strung along.
And it'll give him closure. It sounds like neither of you tried to hurt each other, and in fact wished each other well. So no harm in closure, with emphasis on I'm moving on (since that's what you seem to want).
Posted by P-Angel
To be the partner of a Virgo ... you have to wear the pants. And I mean that strongly. I'm not saying in your fantasy of how you have romanced your love life. I'm talking the Boss of everything.
There's no sitting there, trying to do everything he wants you to do (see above), since that is impossible. Instead, the way to deal with Virgo is to reach them for who they are = workers.
Don't give him the lead, the Virgo is the follower, not the leader ... trust me, I've been married to one for over 3 decades. When you read that Virgos are the Service sign?
That means, literally.
If you want this man, who seems to be trying to show you that he's hanging on right there, waiting for you to take him ... take him.
Tell him what the deal is from then on ... the moment you sit there waiting for him, is the day you lost. because (see above) he won't tell you, and will leave your head spinning.
Absolutely!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! You have to lead, open your mouth and say what it is. If you're not vulnerable, the Virgo man will be too confusing.
Virgo men aren't mind readers
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