Virgos and Apologies

It depends.

One scenario is he waited all this time until he finally got your confession and now he'll vanish.

Mostly likely he's thinking of your motives.

Most likely*

Dam typos...

Ok, so let me see if I understand... 10 years ago you told him you did something that hurt him? He has been thinking that was what happened all these years? You finally tell him the truth?

Yes he is shutting you out, you have been lying to him, lie by omission is still a lie. Hope you guess can sort it out....

^^Guys not guess lol

Posted by phoenixrising12
Hi all,

How do virgos deal with apologies? Ex-virgo and I have retained contact over the past ten years, and we've been cordial and friendly, occasionally talking on the phone and reminiscing. Overall, we have a friendly relationship. No hopes of getting back together, and certainly no bad feelings there from either one of us. However, it took us a long time to get to where we are today.

When he broke up with me all those years ago, I (rather stupidly and naively) did something that hurt him... not because I wanted revenge (even though I'm a scorpio), but because I wanted to protect my heart. I was used to cutting off all ties with exes, but he was one I couldn't let go of because he had my heart so completely, so I decided it would be easier if he hated me. Now, over the years, he occasionally brought the incident up and chalked it up to vengeance, saying he could never fully trust me again. I recently got the courage to tell him the truth...that it was more about my selfish need to take care of what I felt I needed at the time, not to get back at him. That I didn't see the potential consequences my actions would cause, and that to this day, I regret what I did. Apologized for the hurt it caused, and told him it's not my prerogative to do anything like that again, especially since I was young and didn't really have a full grasp on my emotions.

He sent a "shrug" as a response, and I haven't heard from him since (it's been three days, and we've been in contact daily otherwise). Have reached out to no avail. I suspect he needs time to mull it over (?), and I'm getting anxious because I've put myself out there and have received silence since.

Do virgos handle apologies well, and do they come back to talk (either about it, or in general) eventually? Haven't really had to face this with him before. I just don't want to end up pushing him away because I want a read on him. Thanks in advance!

Most Virgo males I know who have been hurt have been consistently the same...when it's over..IT'S OVER.
The "shrug" is confirmation of that.

Posted by phoenixrising12
Oh and one more thing before I forget. Part of me is wondering... do virgos sometimes test people via the silent treatment to see how they react? Or is the silent treatment usually a method they use to protect themselves and work through things?

Same as the shrug as silent treatment. It's over.

What utter bullshit .....

One side of your mouth says you did it because you wanted him to hate you
the other side says you've remained fond of each other

One side of your mouth says you've remained tight-lipped about it, while he brings it up occasionally
the other side says you've tried to address it, while he changed the subject

One side of your mouth attempts to portray an adult with maturity
the other side says you had no clue about the consequences of your own actions

You may have others fool ... but, to me, you're transparent. You've got a ulterior motive ... and surely he knows this too. That is the very reason you come here with your bullshit. You can't convince him you're not being conniving, so you go to strangers to try and convince them.

I guess you shouldn't lose any sleep over this, because in the end you are just friends. If you can't accept what he does, remove yourself altogether. You don't get the right to dictate how he acts around you. Friends don't do that to one another.

However, I'm seeing through the same bullshit as P-angel, and if you really just wanted to be friends, this wouldn't be an issue.

P-angle, Letitbe and Tiz all nailed it..

When a person apologizes for something they should do it with no expectation on the other person. Otherwise you are just apologizing to make yourself feel better, which is selfish.