Give him space or reach out?

Made a post a couple weeks ago about my Aries guy who professed his love for me after a few months and then once I committed to him (like it seemed he wanted me to) he then decided he didn't know what he wanted due to concerns over the back and forth beginning to our courtship.

I'm at a total loss.

I gave him a week of space with minimal contact, then he called me that Friday (two weeks ago) and said he has just been super busy and that he still wanted me to come to his nieces birthday the next day, and I said of course I'll come if you want me there and then he went back and forth, saying he didn't know if he needed space and he didn't think that would help things and he wanted to see me, etc. I told him I am here and if he needs space I understand. He finally decided we should meet up the following Tuesday. During that same conversation, however, he said "I don't know what I need or want and I don't want to deal with this." Naturally my feelings were hurt and I thought good and long about it and I didn't talk to him all weekend but then on Sunday I just reached out asking if we could talk sooner than Tuesday because if he didn't know what he needed or wanted, two more days of space would likely not change that.

He called me that Sunday and we talked and I told him pretty plainly that I loved and cared about him but I want someone who is all in about me and I want to be with him but if he doesn't know what he wants, perhaps he needs to go be alone and figure that out. He didn't argue, he said "you went above and beyond and I really care about you and love you" etc. I cried a little and I heard him get choked up as well, still sounding entirely unsure of what he was doing or saying.

We hung up nicely and haven't spoken since.

I miss him so much, I know it seems obvious he wasn't interested in pursing things further and I should move on, but it's SO confusing because just a week before that he was introducing me to his mom, telling me I was his dream girl, that he was so in love with me, that his concerns had dissipated, etc.

I'm heartbroken. Do I just have to keep walking?

He is Aries, Moon in Scorpio, Venus in Taurus, Mars in Aries, Mercury Aries, Taurus Asc

I'm Gemini, Moon in Virgo, Venus in Aries, Mars in Gemini, Mercury Taurus, Libra Asc

Keep walking my dear



😢

Posted by ashley1734
Made a post a couple weeks ago about my Aries guy who professed his love for me after a few months and then once I committed to him (like it seemed he wanted me to) he then decided he didn't know what he wanted due to concerns over the back and forth beginning to our courtship.

I'm at a total loss.

I gave him a week of space with minimal contact, then he called me that Friday (two weeks ago) and said he has just been super busy and that he still wanted me to come to his nieces birthday the next day, and I said of course I'll come if you want me there and then he went back and forth, saying he didn't know if he needed space and he didn't think that would help things and he wanted to see me, etc. I told him I am here and if he needs space I understand. He finally decided we should meet up the following Tuesday. During that same conversation, however, he said "I don't know what I need or want and I don't want to deal with this." Naturally my feelings were hurt and I thought good and long about it and I didn't talk to him all weekend but then on Sunday I just reached out asking if we could talk sooner than Tuesday because if he didn't know what he needed or wanted, two more days of space would likely not change that.

He called me that Sunday and we talked and I told him pretty plainly that I loved and cared about him but I want someone who is all in about me and I want to be with him but if he doesn't know what he wants, perhaps he needs to go be alone and figure that out. He didn't argue, he said "you went above and beyond and I really care about you and love you" etc. I cried a little and I heard him get choked up as well, still sounding entirely unsure of what he was doing or saying.

We hung up nicely and haven't spoken since.

I miss him so much, I know it seems obvious he wasn't interested in pursing things further and I should move on, but it's SO confusing because just a week before that he was introducing me to his mom, telling me I was his dream girl, that he was so in love with me, that his concerns had dissipated, etc.

I'm heartbroken. Do I just have to keep walking?

He is Aries, Moon in Scorpio, Venus in Taurus, Mars in Aries, Mercury Aries, Taurus Asc

I'm Gemini, Moon in Virgo, Venus in Aries, Mars in Gemini, Mercury Taurus, Libra Asc

sorry, but you need to find happiness - not confusion!

The eclipses in Leo and then in Pisces in this month is going to have lots of drama and things change for lots of people starting i believe in February 7th.. These eclispses and planets revolving happening will impact us in our ways of speaking, thinking, our relarionship issues, even our friendships. Brace yourself, find strength and move on. You cant force anything on anyone. Planets that are going to be impacted is Mercury, Venus, Uranus, and of course the water and fire eclispses all this month til about April 2017.

I'm also talking to an Aries with Venus in Taurus.

All I can tell you is that it takes lots of time and patience with them. He's just processing everything. Us fire signs are impulsive and like to jump in head first, which is what he did. You took the time at first to process everything, which is what he's doing now. The Aries in seeing is looking for stability, consistency and understanding. I'd like to think I'm all of these things. We shall see

Posted by Butterfinger

Posted by ashley1734
Made a post a couple weeks ago about my Aries guy who professed his love for me after a few months and then once I committed to him (like it seemed he wanted me to) he then decided he didn't know what he wanted due to concerns over the back and forth beginning to our courtship.

I'm at a total loss.

I gave him a week of space with minimal contact, then he called me that Friday (two weeks ago) and said he has just been super busy and that he still wanted me to come to his nieces birthday the next day, and I said of course I'll come if you want me there and then he went back and forth, saying he didn't know if he needed space and he didn't think that would help things and he wanted to see me, etc. I told him I am here and if he needs space I understand. He finally decided we should meet up the following Tuesday. During that same conversation, however, he said "I don't know what I need or want and I don't want to deal with this." Naturally my feelings were hurt and I thought good and long about it and I didn't talk to him all weekend but then on Sunday I just reached out asking if we could talk sooner than Tuesday because if he didn't know what he needed or wanted, two more days of space would likely not change that.

He called me that Sunday and we talked and I told him pretty plainly that I loved and cared about him but I want someone who is all in about me and I want to be with him but if he doesn't know what he wants, perhaps he needs to go be alone and figure that out. He didn't argue, he said "you went above and beyond and I really care about you and love you" etc. I cried a little and I heard him get choked up as well, still sounding entirely unsure of what he was doing or saying.

We hung up nicely and haven't spoken since.

I miss him so much, I know it seems obvious he wasn't interested in pursing things further and I should move on, but it's SO confusing because just a week before that he was introducing me to his mom, telling me I was his dream girl, that he was so in love with me, that his concerns had dissipated, etc.

I'm heartbroken. Do I just have to keep walking?

He is Aries, Moon in Scorpio, Venus in Taurus, Mars in Aries, Mercury Aries, Taurus Asc

I'm Gemini, Moon in Virgo, Venus in Aries, Mars in Gemini, Mercury Taurus, Libra Asc

Maybe he's going through some rough patch in his life that he doesn't want you to know hence being undecided where to take from here regarding your relationship.

click to expand

Yeah that makes sense...he did say in our last conversation "maybe I'm not where I need to be for you."

Not entirely sure what he meant by that since I was always telling him "thanks for being you" and stuff so he knew I felt lucky with him (he's super shy and maybe a little insecure).

Posted by Butterfinger

Posted by ashley1734

Posted by Butterfinger

Posted by ashley1734
Made a post a couple weeks ago about my Aries guy who professed his love for me after a few months and then once I committed to him (like it seemed he wanted me to) he then decided he didn't know what he wanted due to concerns over the back and forth beginning to our courtship.

I'm at a total loss.

I gave him a week of space with minimal contact, then he called me that Friday (two weeks ago) and said he has just been super busy and that he still wanted me to come to his nieces birthday the next day, and I said of course I'll come if you want me there and then he went back and forth, saying he didn't know if he needed space and he didn't think that would help things and he wanted to see me, etc. I told him I am here and if he needs space I understand. He finally decided we should meet up the following Tuesday. During that same conversation, however, he said "I don't know what I need or want and I don't want to deal with this." Naturally my feelings were hurt and I thought good and long about it and I didn't talk to him all weekend but then on Sunday I just reached out asking if we could talk sooner than Tuesday because if he didn't know what he needed or wanted, two more days of space would likely not change that.

He called me that Sunday and we talked and I told him pretty plainly that I loved and cared about him but I want someone who is all in about me and I want to be with him but if he doesn't know what he wants, perhaps he needs to go be alone and figure that out. He didn't argue, he said "you went above and beyond and I really care about you and love you" etc. I cried a little and I heard him get choked up as well, still sounding entirely unsure of what he was doing or saying.

We hung up nicely and haven't spoken since.

I miss him so much, I know it seems obvious he wasn't interested in pursing things further and I should move on, but it's SO confusing because just a week before that he was introducing me to his mom, telling me I was his dream girl, that he was so in love with me, that his concerns had dissipated, etc.

I'm heartbroken. Do I just have to keep walking?

He is Aries, Moon in Scorpio, Venus in Taurus, Mars in Aries, Mercury Aries, Taurus Asc

I'm Gemini, Moon in Virgo, Venus in Aries, Mars in Gemini, Mercury Taurus, Libra Asc

Maybe he's going through some rough patch in his life that he doesn't want you to know hence being undecided where to take from here regarding your relationship.

Yeah that makes sense...he did say in our last conversation "maybe I'm not where I need to be for you."

Not entirely sure what he meant by that since I was always telling him "thanks for being you" and stuff so he knew I felt lucky with him (he's super shy and maybe a little insecure).

You can only go so far with assuming things right now unless he opens up to you...so might as well move on with your life and not wait around for him, if he'll come back, he will.

click to expand

Easier said, than done unfortunately. But I will try.

Posted by Butterfinger

Posted by ashley1734

Posted by Butterfinger

Posted by ashley1734
Made a post a couple weeks ago about my Aries guy who professed his love for me after a few months and then once I committed to him (like it seemed he wanted me to) he then decided he didn't know what he wanted due to concerns over the back and forth beginning to our courtship.

I'm at a total loss.

I gave him a week of space with minimal contact, then he called me that Friday (two weeks ago) and said he has just been super busy and that he still wanted me to come to his nieces birthday the next day, and I said of course I'll come if you want me there and then he went back and forth, saying he didn't know if he needed space and he didn't think that would help things and he wanted to see me, etc. I told him I am here and if he needs space I understand. He finally decided we should meet up the following Tuesday. During that same conversation, however, he said "I don't know what I need or want and I don't want to deal with this." Naturally my feelings were hurt and I thought good and long about it and I didn't talk to him all weekend but then on Sunday I just reached out asking if we could talk sooner than Tuesday because if he didn't know what he needed or wanted, two more days of space would likely not change that.

He called me that Sunday and we talked and I told him pretty plainly that I loved and cared about him but I want someone who is all in about me and I want to be with him but if he doesn't know what he wants, perhaps he needs to go be alone and figure that out. He didn't argue, he said "you went above and beyond and I really care about you and love you" etc. I cried a little and I heard him get choked up as well, still sounding entirely unsure of what he was doing or saying.

We hung up nicely and haven't spoken since.

I miss him so much, I know it seems obvious he wasn't interested in pursing things further and I should move on, but it's SO confusing because just a week before that he was introducing me to his mom, telling me I was his dream girl, that he was so in love with me, that his concerns had dissipated, etc.

I'm heartbroken. Do I just have to keep walking?

He is Aries, Moon in Scorpio, Venus in Taurus, Mars in Aries, Mercury Aries, Taurus Asc

I'm Gemini, Moon in Virgo, Venus in Aries, Mars in Gemini, Mercury Taurus, Libra Asc

Maybe he's going through some rough patch in his life that he doesn't want you to know hence being undecided where to take from here regarding your relationship.

Yeah that makes sense...he did say in our last conversation "maybe I'm not where I need to be for you."

Not entirely sure what he meant by that since I was always telling him "thanks for being you" and stuff so he knew I felt lucky with him (he's super shy and maybe a little insecure).

You can only go so far with assuming things right now unless he opens up to you...so might as well move on with your life and not wait around for him, if he'll come back, he will.

click to expand

I dropped off some of his stuff last night and also left a book that I had ordered for him before we parted ways and a note just saying thank you for everything, etc.

He texted and said "Thank you Ashley, that's really nice of you. I hope everythings going well with you. I still think about things all the time. It's been hard."

Sigh..

This sounds familiar. Time to go to Mardi Gras and catch all the beads.

Posted by ashley1734
Made a post a couple weeks ago about my Aries guy who professed his love for me after a few months and then once I committed to him (like it seemed he wanted me to) he then decided he didn't know what he wanted due to concerns over the back and forth beginning to our courtship.

I'm at a total loss.

I gave him a week of space with minimal contact, then he called me that Friday (two weeks ago) and said he has just been super busy and that he still wanted me to come to his nieces birthday the next day, and I said of course I'll come if you want me there and then he went back and forth, saying he didn't know if he needed space and he didn't think that would help things and he wanted to see me, etc. I told him I am here and if he needs space I understand. He finally decided we should meet up the following Tuesday. During that same conversation, however, he said "I don't know what I need or want and I don't want to deal with this." Naturally my feelings were hurt and I thought good and long about it and I didn't talk to him all weekend but then on Sunday I just reached out asking if we could talk sooner than Tuesday because if he didn't know what he needed or wanted, two more days of space would likely not change that.

He called me that Sunday and we talked and I told him pretty plainly that I loved and cared about him but I want someone who is all in about me and I want to be with him but if he doesn't know what he wants, perhaps he needs to go be alone and figure that out. He didn't argue, he said "you went above and beyond and I really care about you and love you" etc. I cried a little and I heard him get choked up as well, still sounding entirely unsure of what he was doing or saying.

We hung up nicely and haven't spoken since.

I miss him so much, I know it seems obvious he wasn't interested in pursing things further and I should move on, but it's SO confusing because just a week before that he was introducing me to his mom, telling me I was his dream girl, that he was so in love with me, that his concerns had dissipated, etc.

I'm heartbroken. Do I just have to keep walking?

He is Aries, Moon in Scorpio, Venus in Taurus, Mars in Aries, Mercury Aries, Taurus Asc

I'm Gemini, Moon in Virgo, Venus in Aries, Mars in Gemini, Mercury Taurus, Libra Asc

I'm an Aries... give him some space. Don't walk out. The people that told me to walk away from

My Leo are the folks encouraging you to walk away... show him what he's missing on giving him space. But after a few weeks he will surely miss you

Posted by Mark-23

Posted by ashley1734
Made a post a couple weeks ago about my Aries guy who professed his love for me after a few months and then once I committed to him (like it seemed he wanted me to) he then decided he didn't know what he wanted due to concerns over the back and forth beginning to our courtship.

I'm at a total loss.

I gave him a week of space with minimal contact, then he called me that Friday (two weeks ago) and said he has just been super busy and that he still wanted me to come to his nieces birthday the next day, and I said of course I'll come if you want me there and then he went back and forth, saying he didn't know if he needed space and he didn't think that would help things and he wanted to see me, etc. I told him I am here and if he needs space I understand. He finally decided we should meet up the following Tuesday. During that same conversation, however, he said "I don't know what I need or want and I don't want to deal with this." Naturally my feelings were hurt and I thought good and long about it and I didn't talk to him all weekend but then on Sunday I just reached out asking if we could talk sooner than Tuesday because if he didn't know what he needed or wanted, two more days of space would likely not change that.

He called me that Sunday and we talked and I told him pretty plainly that I loved and cared about him but I want someone who is all in about me and I want to be with him but if he doesn't know what he wants, perhaps he needs to go be alone and figure that out. He didn't argue, he said "you went above and beyond and I really care about you and love you" etc. I cried a little and I heard him get choked up as well, still sounding entirely unsure of what he was doing or saying.

We hung up nicely and haven't spoken since.

I miss him so much, I know it seems obvious he wasn't interested in pursing things further and I should move on, but it's SO confusing because just a week before that he was introducing me to his mom, telling me I was his dream girl, that he was so in love with me, that his concerns had dissipated, etc.

I'm heartbroken. Do I just have to keep walking?

He is Aries, Moon in Scorpio, Venus in Taurus, Mars in Aries, Mercury Aries, Taurus Asc

I'm Gemini, Moon in Virgo, Venus in Aries, Mars in Gemini, Mercury Taurus, Libra Asc

I'm an Aries... give him some space. Don't walk out. The people that told me to walk away from

My Leo are the folks encouraging you to walk away... show him what he's missing on giving him space. But after a few weeks he will surely miss you

click to expand

Yeah I don't really have a choice but to give him space anyway.

Posted by Mark-23

Posted by ashley1734
Made a post a couple weeks ago about my Aries guy who professed his love for me after a few months and then once I committed to him (like it seemed he wanted me to) he then decided he didn't know what he wanted due to concerns over the back and forth beginning to our courtship.

I'm at a total loss.

I gave him a week of space with minimal contact, then he called me that Friday (two weeks ago) and said he has just been super busy and that he still wanted me to come to his nieces birthday the next day, and I said of course I'll come if you want me there and then he went back and forth, saying he didn't know if he needed space and he didn't think that would help things and he wanted to see me, etc. I told him I am here and if he needs space I understand. He finally decided we should meet up the following Tuesday. During that same conversation, however, he said "I don't know what I need or want and I don't want to deal with this." Naturally my feelings were hurt and I thought good and long about it and I didn't talk to him all weekend but then on Sunday I just reached out asking if we could talk sooner than Tuesday because if he didn't know what he needed or wanted, two more days of space would likely not change that.

He called me that Sunday and we talked and I told him pretty plainly that I loved and cared about him but I want someone who is all in about me and I want to be with him but if he doesn't know what he wants, perhaps he needs to go be alone and figure that out. He didn't argue, he said "you went above and beyond and I really care about you and love you" etc. I cried a little and I heard him get choked up as well, still sounding entirely unsure of what he was doing or saying.

We hung up nicely and haven't spoken since.

I miss him so much, I know it seems obvious he wasn't interested in pursing things further and I should move on, but it's SO confusing because just a week before that he was introducing me to his mom, telling me I was his dream girl, that he was so in love with me, that his concerns had dissipated, etc.

I'm heartbroken. Do I just have to keep walking?

He is Aries, Moon in Scorpio, Venus in Taurus, Mars in Aries, Mercury Aries, Taurus Asc

I'm Gemini, Moon in Virgo, Venus in Aries, Mars in Gemini, Mercury Taurus, Libra Asc

I'm an Aries... give him some space. Don't walk out. The people that told me to walk away from

My Leo are the folks encouraging you to walk away... show him what he's missing on giving him space. But after a few weeks he will surely miss you

click to expand

Yeah I don't really have a choice but to give him space anyway.

Posted by Mark-23

Posted by ashley1734
Made a post a couple weeks ago about my Aries guy who professed his love for me after a few months and then once I committed to him (like it seemed he wanted me to) he then decided he didn't know what he wanted due to concerns over the back and forth beginning to our courtship.

I'm at a total loss.

I gave him a week of space with minimal contact, then he called me that Friday (two weeks ago) and said he has just been super busy and that he still wanted me to come to his nieces birthday the next day, and I said of course I'll come if you want me there and then he went back and forth, saying he didn't know if he needed space and he didn't think that would help things and he wanted to see me, etc. I told him I am here and if he needs space I understand. He finally decided we should meet up the following Tuesday. During that same conversation, however, he said "I don't know what I need or want and I don't want to deal with this." Naturally my feelings were hurt and I thought good and long about it and I didn't talk to him all weekend but then on Sunday I just reached out asking if we could talk sooner than Tuesday because if he didn't know what he needed or wanted, two more days of space would likely not change that.

He called me that Sunday and we talked and I told him pretty plainly that I loved and cared about him but I want someone who is all in about me and I want to be with him but if he doesn't know what he wants, perhaps he needs to go be alone and figure that out. He didn't argue, he said "you went above and beyond and I really care about you and love you" etc. I cried a little and I heard him get choked up as well, still sounding entirely unsure of what he was doing or saying.

We hung up nicely and haven't spoken since.

I miss him so much, I know it seems obvious he wasn't interested in pursing things further and I should move on, but it's SO confusing because just a week before that he was introducing me to his mom, telling me I was his dream girl, that he was so in love with me, that his concerns had dissipated, etc.

I'm heartbroken. Do I just have to keep walking?

He is Aries, Moon in Scorpio, Venus in Taurus, Mars in Aries, Mercury Aries, Taurus Asc

I'm Gemini, Moon in Virgo, Venus in Aries, Mars in Gemini, Mercury Taurus, Libra Asc

I'm an Aries... give him some space. Don't walk out. The people that told me to walk away from

My Leo are the folks encouraging you to walk away... show him what he's missing on giving him space. But after a few weeks he will surely miss you

click to expand

How long does one wait though?

Any man that is a man, wont let the woman he loves slip through his fingers

Love isn't cowardly

Posted by aquarius_beauty

Posted by ashley1734


Yeah that makes sense...he did say in our last conversation "maybe I'm not where I need to be for you."

Not entirely sure what he meant by that since I was always telling him "thanks for being you" and stuff so he knew I felt lucky with him (he's super shy and maybe a little insecure).

That right there ^^ That insecurity is that Scorpio moon. He probably feels like he can't measure up so he's doubting himself. With that Gemini sun and Virgo moon, I'm pretty sure you haven't given him that re-assurance he needs. I'm not blaming you and it's not your fault. He needs to overcome these obstacles on his own. These are deep rooted insecurities that have nothing to do with you, but more so with him.

click to expand

I tried my best to be reassuring, but I think once I finally felt comfortable with him and started REALLY reassuring him, it was already too late.

As far as him being consistent, he really was in the beginning, but he has very little experience with dating and was constantly doing/saying the wrong thing. I gave him the benefit of the doubt most of the time because I knew he didn't mean harm but eventually those things got to me and I was never providing him with the stable ground he needed and wanted until again...too late.

Posted by MyStarsShine

Posted by Mark-23

Posted by ashley1734
Made a post a couple weeks ago about my Aries guy who professed his love for me after a few months and then once I committed to him (like it seemed he wanted me to) he then decided he didn't know what he wanted due to concerns over the back and forth beginning to our courtship.

I'm at a total loss.

I gave him a week of space with minimal contact, then he called me that Friday (two weeks ago) and said he has just been super busy and that he still wanted me to come to his nieces birthday the next day, and I said of course I'll come if you want me there and then he went back and forth, saying he didn't know if he needed space and he didn't think that would help things and he wanted to see me, etc. I told him I am here and if he needs space I understand. He finally decided we should meet up the following Tuesday. During that same conversation, however, he said "I don't know what I need or want and I don't want to deal with this." Naturally my feelings were hurt and I thought good and long about it and I didn't talk to him all weekend but then on Sunday I just reached out asking if we could talk sooner than Tuesday because if he didn't know what he needed or wanted, two more days of space would likely not change that.

He called me that Sunday and we talked and I told him pretty plainly that I loved and cared about him but I want someone who is all in about me and I want to be with him but if he doesn't know what he wants, perhaps he needs to go be alone and figure that out. He didn't argue, he said "you went above and beyond and I really care about you and love you" etc. I cried a little and I heard him get choked up as well, still sounding entirely unsure of what he was doing or saying.

We hung up nicely and haven't spoken since.

I miss him so much, I know it seems obvious he wasn't interested in pursing things further and I should move on, but it's SO confusing because just a week before that he was introducing me to his mom, telling me I was his dream girl, that he was so in love with me, that his concerns had dissipated, etc.

I'm heartbroken. Do I just have to keep walking?

He is Aries, Moon in Scorpio, Venus in Taurus, Mars in Aries, Mercury Aries, Taurus Asc

I'm Gemini, Moon in Virgo, Venus in Aries, Mars in Gemini, Mercury Taurus, Libra Asc

I'm an Aries... give him some space. Don't walk out. The people that told me to walk away from

My Leo are the folks encouraging you to walk away... show him what he's missing on giving him space. But after a few weeks he will surely miss you

How long does one wait though?

Any man that is a man, wont let the woman he loves slip through his fingers

Love isn't cowardly

click to expand

That's how I feel too. I'm willing to accept that perhaps he just didn't/doesn't love me (despite his words), I mean that would hurt of course, but I really feel like he's just extremely confused and perhaps scared. He has deep-rooted issues with his mom that he himself has admitted really affected him.

He said I love you first a few months ago and then he backed off and said "i WANT to be in love with you" and then in the same conversation said "it's not that I don't love you.."

He drives me nuts, but he's all I think about when I'm not busy and I really love him.

Posted by JohnTheBaptist100

Posted by ashley1734

Posted by Mark-23

Posted by ashley1734
Made a post a couple weeks ago about my Aries guy who professed his love for me after a few months and then once I committed to him (like it seemed he wanted me to) he then decided he didn't know what he wanted due to concerns over the back and forth beginning to our courtship.

I'm at a total loss.

I gave him a week of space with minimal contact, then he called me that Friday (two weeks ago) and said he has just been super busy and that he still wanted me to come to his nieces birthday the next day, and I said of course I'll come if you want me there and then he went back and forth, saying he didn't know if he needed space and he didn't think that would help things and he wanted to see me, etc. I told him I am here and if he needs space I understand. He finally decided we should meet up the following Tuesday. During that same conversation, however, he said "I don't know what I need or want and I don't want to deal with this." Naturally my feelings were hurt and I thought good and long about it and I didn't talk to him all weekend but then on Sunday I just reached out asking if we could talk sooner than Tuesday because if he didn't know what he needed or wanted, two more days of space would likely not change that.

He called me that Sunday and we talked and I told him pretty plainly that I loved and cared about him but I want someone who is all in about me and I want to be with him but if he doesn't know what he wants, perhaps he needs to go be alone and figure that out. He didn't argue, he said "you went above and beyond and I really care about you and love you" etc. I cried a little and I heard him get choked up as well, still sounding entirely unsure of what he was doing or saying.

We hung up nicely and haven't spoken since.

I miss him so much, I know it seems obvious he wasn't interested in pursing things further and I should move on, but it's SO confusing because just a week before that he was introducing me to his mom, telling me I was his dream girl, that he was so in love with me, that his concerns had dissipated, etc.

I'm heartbroken. Do I just have to keep walking?

He is Aries, Moon in Scorpio, Venus in Taurus, Mars in Aries, Mercury Aries, Taurus Asc

I'm Gemini, Moon in Virgo, Venus in Aries, Mars in Gemini, Mercury Taurus, Libra Asc

I'm an Aries... give him some space. Don't walk out. The people that told me to walk away from

My Leo are the folks encouraging you to walk away... show him what he's missing on giving him space. But after a few weeks he will surely miss you

Yeah I don't really have a choice but to give him space anyway.

Try the NC for at least 30 days... It will give space and clarity.

How long had you known him? He still refers to you as "Ashleigh" and not "babe" or a "pet name"?

click to expand

He loves using my name in texts, I always thought it was so funny and formal. The "babe" and "baby" stopped a couple weeks ago when things went downhill. Haven't had much contact since.

I'll definitely take 30 days no contact. I don't know if he will actually come after me even if he DID realize he wanted to be with me, that's the saddest and most scary part.

Posted by ashley1734

Posted by MyStarsShine

Posted by Mark-23

Posted by ashley1734
Made a post a couple weeks ago about my Aries guy who professed his love for me after a few months and then once I committed to him (like it seemed he wanted me to) he then decided he didn't know what he wanted due to concerns over the back and forth beginning to our courtship.

I'm at a total loss.

I gave him a week of space with minimal contact, then he called me that Friday (two weeks ago) and said he has just been super busy and that he still wanted me to come to his nieces birthday the next day, and I said of course I'll come if you want me there and then he went back and forth, saying he didn't know if he needed space and he didn't think that would help things and he wanted to see me, etc. I told him I am here and if he needs space I understand. He finally decided we should meet up the following Tuesday. During that same conversation, however, he said "I don't know what I need or want and I don't want to deal with this." Naturally my feelings were hurt and I thought good and long about it and I didn't talk to him all weekend but then on Sunday I just reached out asking if we could talk sooner than Tuesday because if he didn't know what he needed or wanted, two more days of space would likely not change that.

He called me that Sunday and we talked and I told him pretty plainly that I loved and cared about him but I want someone who is all in about me and I want to be with him but if he doesn't know what he wants, perhaps he needs to go be alone and figure that out. He didn't argue, he said "you went above and beyond and I really care about you and love you" etc. I cried a little and I heard him get choked up as well, still sounding entirely unsure of what he was doing or saying.

We hung up nicely and haven't spoken since.

I miss him so much, I know it seems obvious he wasn't interested in pursing things further and I should move on, but it's SO confusing because just a week before that he was introducing me to his mom, telling me I was his dream girl, that he was so in love with me, that his concerns had dissipated, etc.

I'm heartbroken. Do I just have to keep walking?

He is Aries, Moon in Scorpio, Venus in Taurus, Mars in Aries, Mercury Aries, Taurus Asc

I'm Gemini, Moon in Virgo, Venus in Aries, Mars in Gemini, Mercury Taurus, Libra Asc

I'm an Aries... give him some space. Don't walk out. The people that told me to walk away from

My Leo are the folks encouraging you to walk away... show him what he's missing on giving him space. But after a few weeks he will surely miss you

How long does one wait though?

Any man that is a man, wont let the woman he loves slip through his fingers

Love isn't cowardly

That's how I feel too. I'm willing to accept that perhaps he just didn't/doesn't love me (despite his words), I mean that would hurt of course, but I really feel like he's just extremely confused and perhaps scared. He has deep-rooted issues with his mom that he himself has admitted really affected him.

He said I love you first a few months ago and then he backed off and said "i WANT to be in love with you" and then in the same conversation said "it's not that I don't love you.."

He drives me nuts, but he's all I think about when I'm not busy and I really love him.

click to expand

I was with an Aries with Scorp moon who had issues with his mother.....he just didn't show any signs of moving forward and getting help, despite promising to many times. In the end, it was affecting my health so after giving him many chances...I let him go. He was leading a double life to his family. I couldn't be a part of that

So glad to be free if it now. He was always saying everything was diffcult and hard....I became worn down by him

Posted by aquarius_beauty

Posted by Ssuperman
I'm also talking to an Aries with Venus in Taurus.

All I can tell you is that it takes lots of time and patience with them. He's just processing everything. Us fire signs are impulsive and like to jump in head first, which is what he did. You took the time at first to process everything, which is what he's doing now. The Aries in seeing is looking for stability, consistency and understanding. I'd like to think I'm all of these things. We shall see

My ex had those placements and he was always consistent from the very beginning. The only time he hesitated was when we had to get married and I was pregnant. We were so young, so I completely understand...plus I had doubts myself. Venus in Taurus are very consistent and persistent. Once they have you they will not let you go.

click to expand

That's what I'm hoping for! 😉

Posted by MyStarsShine

Posted by Mark-23

Posted by ashley1734
Made a post a couple weeks ago about my Aries guy who professed his love for me after a few months and then once I committed to him (like it seemed he wanted me to) he then decided he didn't know what he wanted due to concerns over the back and forth beginning to our courtship.

I'm at a total loss.

I gave him a week of space with minimal contact, then he called me that Friday (two weeks ago) and said he has just been super busy and that he still wanted me to come to his nieces birthday the next day, and I said of course I'll come if you want me there and then he went back and forth, saying he didn't know if he needed space and he didn't think that would help things and he wanted to see me, etc. I told him I am here and if he needs space I understand. He finally decided we should meet up the following Tuesday. During that same conversation, however, he said "I don't know what I need or want and I don't want to deal with this." Naturally my feelings were hurt and I thought good and long about it and I didn't talk to him all weekend but then on Sunday I just reached out asking if we could talk sooner than Tuesday because if he didn't know what he needed or wanted, two more days of space would likely not change that.

He called me that Sunday and we talked and I told him pretty plainly that I loved and cared about him but I want someone who is all in about me and I want to be with him but if he doesn't know what he wants, perhaps he needs to go be alone and figure that out. He didn't argue, he said "you went above and beyond and I really care about you and love you" etc. I cried a little and I heard him get choked up as well, still sounding entirely unsure of what he was doing or saying.

We hung up nicely and haven't spoken since.

I miss him so much, I know it seems obvious he wasn't interested in pursing things further and I should move on, but it's SO confusing because just a week before that he was introducing me to his mom, telling me I was his dream girl, that he was so in love with me, that his concerns had dissipated, etc.

I'm heartbroken. Do I just have to keep walking?

He is Aries, Moon in Scorpio, Venus in Taurus, Mars in Aries, Mercury Aries, Taurus Asc

I'm Gemini, Moon in Virgo, Venus in Aries, Mars in Gemini, Mercury Taurus, Libra Asc

I'm an Aries... give him some space. Don't walk out. The people that told me to walk away from

My Leo are the folks encouraging you to walk away... show him what he's missing on giving him space. But after a few weeks he will surely miss you

How long does one wait though?

Any man that is a man, wont let the woman he loves slip through his fingers

Love isn't cowardly

click to expand

I swear words of fucking wisdom! I wish my Leo would see that I never gave up on her and love her to death!

Posted by aquarius_beauty

Posted by ashley1734
I tried my best to be reassuring, but I think once I finally felt comfortable with him and started REALLY reassuring him, it was already too late.

As far as him being consistent, he really was in the beginning, but he has very little experience with dating and was constantly doing/saying the wrong thing. I gave him the benefit of the doubt most of the time because I knew he didn't mean harm but eventually those things got to me and I was never providing him with the stable ground he needed and wanted until again...too late.

Wow, the way you described your relationship is like reading my own. The best you can do right now is give him that space that you yourself said he needs. As for yourself, do the same. Reflect, sit back, sip a bit of wine, go out and have fun. When he feels like he's losing his grip on you, he will come back again. That Scorpio moon is a fixed sign. If he truly loved you, he still will. Fixed signs are harder to let go of something that they wanted. Especially with that Aries sun...yeah I don't see how he can overcome you so quickly.

Fire signs with a powerful moon sign like Scorpio is an internal battle with their personality (ego). That fire sign is telling him to be vivacious, vibrant, passionate and everlasting warmth. But with that cold moon that is insecure, darkly intense, and brooding...it's like a never ending battle. They will always battle with how they feel versus how they know and think they shall feel. So this is where you get the wishy washy, because Aries, Leos, and Sagittarius (although prone to insecurities themselves) will always push ahead and achieve greatness. But that emotional, dark moon, will always try and damper them and cause doubt.

click to expand

That makes a lot of sense. And ever since I met him I've felt that inner turmoil that he has with himself.

I wouldn't imagine it would be so easy to let me go, especially because he is super tight with his family and they all loved me and vice verse. I'm sure he's not having the easiest time of it, but of course with no communication it's easy for my mind to wander off and assume he's just washed his hands of it no problem.

Aries sun with Scorpio moon is a very difficult aspect......Inconjunct.....at odds with each other...lots of inner turmoil and confusion. Add that in with mother issues, and you have a big of a headf*ck tbh

Posted by JohnTheBaptist100

Posted by ashley1734

Posted by JohnTheBaptist100

Posted by ashley1734

Posted by Mark-23

Posted by ashley1734
Made a post a couple weeks ago about my Aries guy who professed his love for me after a few months and then once I committed to him (like it seemed he wanted me to) he then decided he didn't know what he wanted due to concerns over the back and forth beginning to our courtship.

I'm at a total loss.

I gave him a week of space with minimal contact, then he called me that Friday (two weeks ago) and said he has just been super busy and that he still wanted me to come to his nieces birthday the next day, and I said of course I'll come if you want me there and then he went back and forth, saying he didn't know if he needed space and he didn't think that would help things and he wanted to see me, etc. I told him I am here and if he needs space I understand. He finally decided we should meet up the following Tuesday. During that same conversation, however, he said "I don't know what I need or want and I don't want to deal with this." Naturally my feelings were hurt and I thought good and long about it and I didn't talk to him all weekend but then on Sunday I just reached out asking if we could talk sooner than Tuesday because if he didn't know what he needed or wanted, two more days of space would likely not change that.

He called me that Sunday and we talked and I told him pretty plainly that I loved and cared about him but I want someone who is all in about me and I want to be with him but if he doesn't know what he wants, perhaps he needs to go be alone and figure that out. He didn't argue, he said "you went above and beyond and I really care about you and love you" etc. I cried a little and I heard him get choked up as well, still sounding entirely unsure of what he was doing or saying.

We hung up nicely and haven't spoken since.

I miss him so much, I know it seems obvious he wasn't interested in pursing things further and I should move on, but it's SO confusing because just a week before that he was introducing me to his mom, telling me I was his dream girl, that he was so in love with me, that his concerns had dissipated, etc.

I'm heartbroken. Do I just have to keep walking?

He is Aries, Moon in Scorpio, Venus in Taurus, Mars in Aries, Mercury Aries, Taurus Asc

I'm Gemini, Moon in Virgo, Venus in Aries, Mars in Gemini, Mercury Taurus, Libra Asc

I'm an Aries... give him some space. Don't walk out. The people that told me to walk away from

My Leo are the folks encouraging you to walk away... show him what he's missing on giving him space. But after a few weeks he will surely miss you

Yeah I don't really have a choice but to give him space anyway.

Try the NC for at least 30 days... It will give space and clarity.

How long had you known him? He still refers to you as "Ashleigh" and not "babe" or a "pet name"?

He loves using my name in texts, I always thought it was so funny and formal. The "babe" and "baby" stopped a couple weeks ago when things went downhill. Haven't had much contact since.

I'll definitely take 30 days no contact. I don't know if he will actually come after me even if he DID realize he wanted to be with me, that's the saddest and most scary part.

The NC method is for you...

I always use this method.. It's for you on your new journey and leaving him (your past) behind...

It's a "cold turkey" way of ending a relationship... If the person comes back in your life the 30 NC will help you gain clarity and the space will make him miss you....

Clarity for both parties.

How long did you know him?

click to expand

About 7-8 months.

Posted by JohnTheBaptist100

Posted by ashley1734

Posted by JohnTheBaptist100

Posted by ashley1734

Posted by JohnTheBaptist100

Posted by ashley1734

Posted by Mark-23

Posted by ashley1734
Made a post a couple weeks ago about my Aries guy who professed his love for me after a few months and then once I committed to him (like it seemed he wanted me to) he then decided he didn't know what he wanted due to concerns over the back and forth beginning to our courtship.

I'm at a total loss.

I gave him a week of space with minimal contact, then he called me that Friday (two weeks ago) and said he has just been super busy and that he still wanted me to come to his nieces birthday the next day, and I said of course I'll come if you want me there and then he went back and forth, saying he didn't know if he needed space and he didn't think that would help things and he wanted to see me, etc. I told him I am here and if he needs space I understand. He finally decided we should meet up the following Tuesday. During that same conversation, however, he said "I don't know what I need or want and I don't want to deal with this." Naturally my feelings were hurt and I thought good and long about it and I didn't talk to him all weekend but then on Sunday I just reached out asking if we could talk sooner than Tuesday because if he didn't know what he needed or wanted, two more days of space would likely not change that.

He called me that Sunday and we talked and I told him pretty plainly that I loved and cared about him but I want someone who is all in about me and I want to be with him but if he doesn't know what he wants, perhaps he needs to go be alone and figure that out. He didn't argue, he said "you went above and beyond and I really care about you and love you" etc. I cried a little and I heard him get choked up as well, still sounding entirely unsure of what he was doing or saying.

We hung up nicely and haven't spoken since.

I miss him so much, I know it seems obvious he wasn't interested in pursing things further and I should move on, but it's SO confusing because just a week before that he was introducing me to his mom, telling me I was his dream girl, that he was so in love with me, that his concerns had dissipated, etc.

I'm heartbroken. Do I just have to keep walking?

He is Aries, Moon in Scorpio, Venus in Taurus, Mars in Aries, Mercury Aries, Taurus Asc

I'm Gemini, Moon in Virgo, Venus in Aries, Mars in Gemini, Mercury Taurus, Libra Asc

I'm an Aries... give him some space. Don't walk out. The people that told me to walk away from

My Leo are the folks encouraging you to walk away... show him what he's missing on giving him space. But after a few weeks he will surely miss you

Yeah I don't really have a choice but to give him space anyway.

Try the NC for at least 30 days... It will give space and clarity.

How long had you known him? He still refers to you as "Ashleigh" and not "babe" or a "pet name"?

He loves using my name in texts, I always thought it was so funny and formal. The "babe" and "baby" stopped a couple weeks ago when things went downhill. Haven't had much contact since.

I'll definitely take 30 days no contact. I don't know if he will actually come after me even if he DID realize he wanted to be with me, that's the saddest and most scary part.

The NC method is for you...

I always use this method.. It's for you on your new journey and leaving him (your past) behind...

It's a "cold turkey" way of ending a relationship... If the person comes back in your life the 30 NC will help you gain clarity and the space will make him miss you....

Clarity for both parties.

How long did you know him?

About 7-8 months.

Ok. Not long, but fire and air signs tend to rush into relationships very quickly.

Id say go NC for a while but do it for you.

click to expand

Ok thank you I will. And yes it has to be for me otherwise it will feel like I'm waiting for something that may never happen. I should just look at it as moving on.

Posted by aquarius_beauty

Posted by ashley1734
That makes a lot of sense. And ever since I met him I've felt that inner turmoil that he has with himself.

I wouldn't imagine it would be so easy to let me go, especially because he is super tight with his family and they all loved me and vice verse. I'm sure he's not having the easiest time of it, but of course with no communication it's easy for my mind to wander off and assume he's just washed his hands of it no problem.

I personally think he will come back. The Leo in my life came back after 2-3 months and told me how he felt and why he pushed me away. It was stupid but completely understandable. It's the way he feels, you can't change that. But you can help guide them and help deal with those emotions. Thing with fire signs is that they're so proud! My ex was an Aries and he would never accept defeat, even with himself. Leo was the same because he assured himself that he was the best. But I knew deep down he had very deep rooted insecurities. Most of them stemming from his disconnection with his family especially his mom.

I tried my best to be there for him, but I decided to walk away. Because if you're anything like me (Gemini moonie) then you know we can't handle roller coaster emotions. It drains us and we're not ones to give 100% without receiving exactly the same in return.

Try the 30 day NC. If he's anything like my Aries, they probably won't last beyond the 2 weeks threshold.

click to expand

I hope that's the case!

We haven't seen each other in three weeks and aside from the texts regarding the book, we haven't talked in two weeks, though somehow that feels like it's been MONTHS. 😢

Posted by ashley1734

Posted by aquarius_beauty

Posted by ashley1734
That makes a lot of sense. And ever since I met him I've felt that inner turmoil that he has with himself.

I wouldn't imagine it would be so easy to let me go, especially because he is super tight with his family and they all loved me and vice verse. I'm sure he's not having the easiest time of it, but of course with no communication it's easy for my mind to wander off and assume he's just washed his hands of it no problem.

I personally think he will come back. The Leo in my life came back after 2-3 months and told me how he felt and why he pushed me away. It was stupid but completely understandable. It's the way he feels, you can't change that. But you can help guide them and help deal with those emotions. Thing with fire signs is that they're so proud! My ex was an Aries and he would never accept defeat, even with himself. Leo was the same because he assured himself that he was the best. But I knew deep down he had very deep rooted insecurities. Most of them stemming from his disconnection with his family especially his mom.

I tried my best to be there for him, but I decided to walk away. Because if you're anything like me (Gemini moonie) then you know we can't handle roller coaster emotions. It drains us and we're not ones to give 100% without receiving exactly the same in return.

Try the 30 day NC. If he's anything like my Aries, they probably won't last beyond the 2 weeks threshold.

I hope that's the case!

We haven't seen each other in three weeks and aside from the texts regarding the book, we haven't talked in two weeks, though somehow that feels like it's been MONTHS. 😢

click to expand

How long are you going to hold out girl?

It's hard to move on, but you may need to

*hugs*

Posted by MyStarsShine

Posted by ashley1734

Posted by aquarius_beauty

Posted by ashley1734
That makes a lot of sense. And ever since I met him I've felt that inner turmoil that he has with himself.

I wouldn't imagine it would be so easy to let me go, especially because he is super tight with his family and they all loved me and vice verse. I'm sure he's not having the easiest time of it, but of course with no communication it's easy for my mind to wander off and assume he's just washed his hands of it no problem.

I personally think he will come back. The Leo in my life came back after 2-3 months and told me how he felt and why he pushed me away. It was stupid but completely understandable. It's the way he feels, you can't change that. But you can help guide them and help deal with those emotions. Thing with fire signs is that they're so proud! My ex was an Aries and he would never accept defeat, even with himself. Leo was the same because he assured himself that he was the best. But I knew deep down he had very deep rooted insecurities. Most of them stemming from his disconnection with his family especially his mom.

I tried my best to be there for him, but I decided to walk away. Because if you're anything like me (Gemini moonie) then you know we can't handle roller coaster emotions. It drains us and we're not ones to give 100% without receiving exactly the same in return.

Try the 30 day NC. If he's anything like my Aries, they probably won't last beyond the 2 weeks threshold.

I hope that's the case!

We haven't seen each other in three weeks and aside from the texts regarding the book, we haven't talked in two weeks, though somehow that feels like it's been MONTHS. 😢

How long are you going to hold out girl?

It's hard to move on, but you may need to

*hugs*

click to expand

Yeah, my purpose of no contact is to move on, but of course I am still holding onto the sliver of hope that he does love me and is just confused (silly maybe, but it's hard for me to accept that none of it was real for him).

See how you feel in a couple of weeks or so, then start to let go slowly....if he doesn't contact you, that is



xoxo

Posted by MyStarsShine
See how you feel in a couple of weeks or so, then start to let go slowly....if he doesn't contact you, that is



xoxo

Well it's been a month since things ended and I ended up messaging him yesterday afternoon with a link to this Neil Degrasse Tyson tour and just said "hey my friend went to this last night and said it was awesome, so I thought I'd let you know about it, he's coming to L.A. in May. Miss you, hope you've been well..."

Or something to that effect. He responded a few hours later and said "I really do miss you too. I've been driving all day and just got to my dad's for dinner so it's been hard to text back. That does sound cool...I'll check it out. I hope you're doing well too."

To me, it seems he's cordial, but over it. I really gotta move on.

Posted by NotSoInstant

Posted by ashley1734

Posted by MyStarsShine
See how you feel in a couple of weeks or so, then start to let go slowly....if he doesn't contact you, that is



xoxo

Well it's been a month since things ended and I ended up messaging him yesterday afternoon with a link to this Neil Degrasse Tyson tour and just said "hey my friend went to this last night and said it was awesome, so I thought I'd let you know about it, he's coming to L.A. in May. Miss you, hope you've been well..."

Or something to that effect. He responded a few hours later and said "I really do miss you too. I've been driving all day and just got to my dad's for dinner so it's been hard to text back. That does sound cool...I'll check it out. I hope you're doing well too."

To me, it seems he's cordial, but over it. I really gotta move on.

Yeah, he is over it 😢

This last months been brutal for Geminis...

click to expand

Is it gonna get better?

This has been taking me WAY too long to recover from. It's as if we dated for years, it's pathetic really. I mean I always have a hard time with breakups, but this is ridiculous.