Do Married Cancers Ever Leave? (Page 2)

^5 Mai, has your Cancer called yet? lol meet me on your board

Alrighty

My Cancer was loose as a goose when he was younger. He was the town football star in a small town then went on to play football at a state university...we discussed his past and he has NO qualms about disclosing his romps and how his behavior in relationships has changed. He's still a big ole flirt and social butterfly, but I know he's very protective of his heart and his relationship decisions. Krobe probably said it correctly tho, men like mystery and Cancers like variation.

notso - no matter what I say you will try to tell me I am prejudice - so I give up - think whatever you want.

as far as cancer men cheating - those are the unhappy ones, cancer men don't like to give up on a situation - even a bad one - so they end up tying themselves to women that are no good for them. Then they want out but won't leave - so they end up flirting and looking around - if he finds a good woman who makes him happy then, married or just in a relationship, he may actually leave the one he's with - but a woman who actually urges him to leave will not win his favor......a woman who he can just relax with and respects that he is in a relationship will get a lot further - which means a woman who is not trying to get ANYWHERE.......

oh and let me clarify - I don't mean ALL cancer men who cheat are unhappy....that is just the most common reason - of course there are cancer bastards just like there bastards of every sign.......but I'd rather judge the bad ones by the good ones than vice versa

im never getting married.....material things and animals are all the constants i want in my life. people will come and go.....they always have. my brothers a scorpio and hes been married and divorced 3 times. that could have just been break-ups not divorces.

I don't see what the big deal is with cancer men supposedly being so hard to handle...mine hasn't given me a headache (yet, as I sense he is clearly capable). *passing the asprin to the cat with the Scorp brother* give this to the exwives and future girlfriends. My ex was a scorp and he was both the love of my life and the bane of my existance (Im a Taurus so rightly so). My Cancer man is more stable and mature than any man I've dealt with romantically. He isn't perfect, but he's more than willing to admit that so in my opinion that puts him a step ahead of every other imperfect person than wont admit defeat. I feel like Cancer men are more apt to cheat with their eyes and their bodies but less with their emotions and hearts...which is why they have the reputation of clinging but also being flirtatious. They don't want the hassle of having to be vulnerable so they keep the woman who they can trust with their heart and do other things with women they dont have to really trust. Thankfully mine seems to have matured into finding value in fidelity. This doesn't mean any of them aren't faithful, but it's quite a job keeping him satisfied as Krobe has mentioned many times.

I agree Archer with "if ONLY people wuold stop interfering.." It sickens me to see someone selfishly wishing or acting in a way that is for the demise of someone else's marriage or relationship. Even if that person voices unhappiness you should still encourage them to give it a try if they can (unless its abusive or otherwise harmful). But a lot of people are selfish and would rather "help someone through a divorce" for their own hidden agendas then support them to keep their commitment...have people forgotten that marriage is a vow before God?

Ldy I think you missed something very important I typed just a couple words over. My cancer has matured into valuing fidelity. I'm not worried about wondering eyes or even friendly flirting. Im quite sociable myself. Musical beds however will get him cut.

Like people of any sign, some things take maturity like being faithful in a relationship and sticking around to make a relationship work when times get hard. I'm more than a believer in monogamous relationships so please dont think that I would in anyway be the type of woman thats interested in sharing my man with anyone. Man sharing= deperation.

you copied SOME of what I typed so without the before and after your response was out of context...

it is said that when taurus and cancer meet they trust each other INSTANTLY - they just sense that they can - whcih is quite a feat for BOTH signs - and in my experience it has been true.
SF your man probably gives other people a migraine - but with you it's different.

"So what that tells me is you are okay for your man to have wandering eyes and play musical beds because at the end of the day he comes home to you"

I think that if the cancer man can find the woman who gives him EVERYTHING he needs in a relationship then he will not go looking elsewhere to fill in the gaps.....I think SF can give her man that, and that is why they are so confidant in each other.She gives him the emotional support and trust that he needs, but we bulls are also very sensual....she's got all her bases covered.

yeah - we actually manage to stay friends after a break-up......hard to do with mosty people

I thought your message said "WTF" because you took what I typed out of context or rather didnt read all that I had typed before you replied. I read my posts a couple of times before I post them to make sure they are clear and concise. And my panties are unbunched now...thank you.

I got what you were saying SF - I took it as you expounding on the reasoning....not necessarily saying it was what you wanted or accepted in a relationship.

lol he might give other people migraines, but of course I can't imagine why. He's lovely and easy to understand. He's calm and easy going. I think we're a good match too Angel. We're very compatible. My Cancer is a bit jealous and quite considerate so I think that helps him not to flirt too much in front of me (he considers how much flirting he wants me to do in front of him). I wouldnt say instant trust because we both made a lot of assumations about each other, he thought I was stuck up and quick tempered just as much as I thought he was a arrogant player, but we're both taking the time to get to know one another.

oh I know that goes for ANY man - but there is a lot of cancer bashing here, so I'm just trying to play devils advocate and show the other side of the coin for these men.

I agree. Cheating and cheaters stink!
I understand Ldy. He's my first cancer and there are a lot more factors that are influencing us other than just astrology. We have a lot of the same ideas and veiws on certain things based mostly on upbringing and experiences, so dont think I'm disagreeing with anything you're saying about cancer behavior because you have more experience than I have. I can just speak for my own.
Im pretty young so I haven't been with a lot of men and I've only dealt with 1 sign more than once. Pisces...NEVER again!

lol I have too, believe me they arent ashamed of it. I quickly send them on their way. Even men with girlfriends. If he's anything other than single, divorced, or widowed Im not even entertaining it.

yeah thats me. Thank you. Is that your pic? What diet are you on..I'm trying to lose some weight 😉

lol nevermind that was a bad joke.

lol interesting. I think maybe the Cancer man's cheating reputation is as bad as the Taurus woman's materialistic repuation. Im not materialistic at all. Dont get me wrong I love beauty and nice things, but I'm very appreciative of the simple things in life. The finer things enhance life they dont make it. So maybe a lot of cancer men cheat but surely not all of anything does anything except live and die. If my man cheats I'm getting some Old Bay and breakin out the pot....I'll fix that Crab.

well italian and german I can't do....not yet..... but french and a little arabic

thats great, Im glad yall can get along especially with children in the picture. There are a lot of important factors in relationships and I'm glad I got to the age where I threw out the romance novels and picked up some real knowledge. Im very thankful that more than he is a Cancer, my Hun is mature. Maturity makes a world or difference in relationships.

dont even type carbs....thats a love/hate relationship.

lol thats what i was getting at with the joke Moon, Im glad someone got it.

its ok notso, as you saw it didnt take me long to realize it was a bad joke. But I am really trying to lose weight so your feedback was welcome.

I hear U ladies speaking,
I clearly do. But, I have my own opinions. That is probably Y, I have success with my Cancer friend. I don't say MAN, because until he makes himself be my man, then he is just my friend. Yes, he wants to be my man, and has said this numerous amounts of times, but I go by actions. Not just words.

I hear alot of ASSUMING going on here. I hear ladies say, what THEY ASSUME CANCER MEN want. And this is the reason why 50% of marriages end in divorce. NO ONE, should expect to get their needs met by another person. NO ONE can make U happy. U have to find happiness in yourself. Once YOU find happiness in yourself, others become happy.

Point, I KNOW NOW why CANCER men walk away from the so called "perfect mate" and stick with the bad mates. Simply because the bad mate is just being herself. She is not looking for him to make her happy. ALL men SAY they want a woman to be good to them, but NO they don't. U can be good on YOUR terms, but if you act to good, he will walk away. Why? because being to good is has a limit. Being to sympathetic, empathetic, controlling, desperate, door matish, etc....it all has a LIMIT! And a man will take you for granted if you supply ALL these things and walk away from you. He won't while you are giving him all of this, but once you have NO MORE to give he will leave.

I heard someone say, Cancer men don't like women who let them go ahead on. While I am sorry to tell you, if you don't let him go ahead on and stop trying to CONTROL him, then he will not stay with you. Let him go ahead on and find happiness elsewhere if that is what he needs to do. He will come back simply because NO MATTER WHAT, NO ONE PERSON will ever make him happy, so why try.

You ladies sound like you are trying to hard to please and that is probably the reason why he is not opening up to you. NEVER try to hard to please a man, or expect him to try to please you, or make YOU happy. He NEVER will make you as happy as you can make yourself.

If you REMAIN A REAL woman, and don't and just be yourself, he will have alot more respect for you, and let you inside of his world. You HAVE to be yourself. Quit worrying about chasing him away, being sympathetic and empathetic and controlling. This will chase him away. However, if you are REAL and let him be his natural self, he will let you inside his shell slowly. But, don't think being this CERTAIN way that I hear ladies say on this board is going to keep him engaged because it is not.

Sorry for the typos.

If you REMAIN A REAL woman, and don't and just be yourself, he will have alot more respect for you, and let you inside of his world. You HAVE to be yourself. Quit worrying about chasing him away, being sympathetic and empathetic and controlling. This will chase him away. However, if you are REAL and let him be his natural self, he will let you inside his shell slowly. But, don't think being this CERTAIN way that I hear ladies say on this board is going to keep him engaged because it is not.

I meant if you remain a REAL woman, and just BE YOURSELF. You can be sweet, nice, and do some good things (IF HE ASKS) on your own terms. But, don't just ASSUME that what YOU want to do, is what he wants you to do. Usually a man will ASK you to do something instead of you just doing what you think he wants. Do what HE asks, give him attention when he asks, be empathetic if he asks you too etc. Don't JUST DO it.

don't ASSUME that those of us who do nice things are doing it to please men.....some of us do it because it pleases US to do it.....the thing you mentioned about someone saying let him go do his thing and he'll come back was said by seetest fatale - who ALSO said elsewhere that she is sweet and affectionate and encouraging with her guy NOT to try and get him, but because it makes HER happy to do it.....you're sitting here saying we need to be ourselves - but honestly the only "self" you want anyone to be is the one you tell them to.... I've held back on saying that for some time now - but really, you're telling us to be ourselves then telling us we have to change our way of thinking and acting......we're all getting along just fine and then you have to come in a put people down......
That's it - I've said my piece.

don't ASSUME that those of us who do nice things are doing it to please men.....some of us do it because it pleases US to do it.....the thing you mentioned about someone saying let him go do his thing and he'll come back was said by seetest fatale - who ALSO said elsewhere that she is sweet and affectionate and encouraging with her guy NOT to try and get him, but because it makes HER happy to do it.....you're sitting here saying we need to be ourselves - but honestly the only "self" you want anyone to be is the one you tell them to.... I've held back on saying that for some time now - but really, you're telling us to be ourselves then telling us we have to change our way of thinking and acting......we're all getting along just fine and then you have to come in a put people down......
That's it - I've said my piece.

XF,
NO ONE CAN PUT YOU DOWN IF YOU ARE HAPPY WITHIN YOURSELF! How can YOU let someone else put you down. If you are offended, oh well. However, YOU don't have to read my advice. That is why I am not wondering about a Cancer man and I am not having him RUN from me, instead of running to me. I am just saying that some of the advice I am reading is ALL based on ASSUMPTIONS! Of what YOU want to do. Maybe try getting some self help within yourself, and you will see that NO ONE CAN BRING UP Down. Only if your self esteem is low. But, I also, see that you argue with Tikki alot too. So, just don't read our advice.

Mooneyes,

Doing NICE things can be done, but on your OWN terms. You can only be nice to a certain extent to a man. It just does not cut it out with a man, to assume that he wants you to just NATURALLY do nice things for him. Yes, he will LET you do nice things for him, however, it is a KNOWN STATISTIC that men LEAVE women who are like this. Matter of fact 95% of men eventually leave women who does nice things because THEY want to. And then when the man runs away, women wonder what did they do wrong. But, I am not going to argue, you live and learn. Period. You will look up one day and see that some things just don't work. And I am not talking about with Cancer men in general, I am taking about with ALL men.

you're sitting here saying we need to be ourselves - but honestly the only "self" you want anyone to be is the one you tell them to.... I've held back on saying that for some time now - but really, you're telling us to be ourselves then telling us we have to change our way of thinking and acting......we're all getting along just fine and then you have to come in a put people down......
That's it - I've said my piece.

I am simply saying BE YOURSELF! To a MAN this so called I am doing this because I want to do them--sends out certain signals.....CHEAP! I am SORRY but, I get my information from MEN themselves. AND ALL MEN HAVE the SAME BIOLOGICAL MAKEUP to a certain extent.

NOW if you want a arguement. ARGUE with the MEN who say that they don't RESPECT women that act put on a act of not being themselves. Men and women DON'T THINK ALIKE! What you may THINK is right, just might not be the right thing.

assuming goes both ways...you can assume that he doesnt want something and you can assume that he wants something. I think if 2 mature honest people are in a relationship then they can both ask for what they want and they can ask if what they desire to give will be well recieved. I can be nice to a man to the extent that I desire to be nice to anyone, if he doesn't like it or decides to take advantage of it then he is welcome to go about his business. Statistics are never 100% unless you're reading something that says 100% of people are born and 100% of people will die (the same is true of 0% stats). I'm not going to change the fact that I like being nice to a man when the situation calls for it for fear the he's going to leave if I want to be nice. Just like Im not going to tell my man that I don't like something I do or that I like something I dont. You cant speak about men in general because you are neither a man nor have you been with all men. I've read a book written by a man about what men want and he said the best thing any 2 people in a relationship can do is tell the other person what it is they want and to not assume what the other person wants. What men dont want is a woman who mothers them and mothering a man and being nice to him are 2 very different things.

And how can a man know if you are doing something because its something you do or if you are just doing it for him anyway? If he doesnt know what you did before you started doing it for him what does he have to compare it to to know that you havent always done it? That would mean that he has to assume that you are doing it for him although you say you're doing it because you want to and if he does than then he doesnt trust you to mean what you say. I know that my man likes when I am nice to him because he lets me know he appreciates it. I do understand where you're coming to from the point that men dont like someone to fake or put on a show because my man also like that I hold him accountable and he wants me to be honest with him when he upsets me. You can be nice without being a pushover or a doormat, it takes balance as does everything in life.

SF - you're not saying anything I haven't already...krobe is set in her ways. That is why I said "I've said my piece, I'm done" because this will go on and on until you agree with her.

Archer, glad to see I'm not the only one who realises this.....

Im really just asking questions to see from her point of veiw. I see a lot of definite's that arent definite's like "all men have the same biological make up to some extent"...you honestly have to include the "to some extent" because thats the truth, but adding the "to some extent" you have to take off the "all" and "same". All simply cant have the Same to a Certain Extent, its either all or some and its either same or different. All have some similarities in biological makeup or some have the same biological makeup...and you just cant say "all men what this" or "all men want..." or "no men want..." you cant even say "all cancers..." Generalizations stink.

XF!
NO ONE IS EVER LOOKING FOR YOU TOO AGREE, that is the point your are not GETTING. THIS IS JUST ADVICE. Take it or leave it. I know ALL the women who sends me texts and listens to my advice. GET IMMEDIATE RESULTS! So, it must be some truth to what I am saying. I see you only look at this on one side of the fence instead of looking at the WHOLE perspective. Try getting some self esteem.

Now SF,
You talk with GOOD sense. You know what your man likes and dislikes and can pick up when he is upset with you! That is good. I am not bashing your ideas and you give GOOD advice. I did not particularly say you, I said SOME women. If the shoe fits where it. I have a BROAD perspective of ALL MEN. Not just Cancer males. And yes, I share the very same ideas that you have. My Cancer friend likes when I am nice, and he likes when I get ANGRY to a certain extent. I know for SURE! Cancer men trive off of painful relationships. You don't have to let him bring you down though. ALL you need to do is have confidence in YOURSELF, not try to change HIM, (SF-like I see you are not trying to do) and be yourself. But, too much of too much is just too much. I notice Cancer men run away from alot of relationships with women.

lol I guess Im typing to myself, but I'm thinking about it and I guess the easiest way for a man to tell you're doing something for him and not to be nice is when you always expect something in return for it. When you're doing something you enjoy you dont need something in return, the enjoyment is in doing it. I think that is what gives me the freedom to be nice to my Cancer and for him to appreciate it. Im not doing things for him to hold him accountable because of my actions (for example: I sent you a text message, why didnt you send me one back or I cooked for you why didnt you cook for me). When I send him a message its to let him know I was thinking about him, he doesn't have to reply because I didnt send it to get a reply. The only thing that I want to know is that he will appreciate it and I find that out by letting him tell me its something he wants or by asking him if its something that will be well recieved. For example I asked him what he wanted for his birthday, he said nothing its just another day and I told him if that's how he feels then that's what will be. I did get him a card and he was giggling when I gave it to him, but if I would have went all out he would have most likely been upset.

can I say to the singular encyclopedia on cancers .. 😉

Thank you archer, I knew a MAN would pick up real quick on what I am saying! All the MEN do agree with what I have to say.

Im really just asking questions to see from her point of veiw. I see a lot of definite's that arent definite's like "all men have the same biological make up to some extent"...you honestly have to include the "to some extent" because thats the truth, but adding the "to some extent" you have to take off the "all" and "same". All simply cant have the Same to a Certain Extent, its either all or some and its either same or different. All have some similarities in biological makeup or some have the same biological makeup...and you just cant say "all men what this" or "all men want..." or "no men want..." you cant even say "all cancers..." Generalizations stink

Well I got this info from a psychologist who deals with the biological makeup of men. So, that will have to be a arguement you have to take up with a man. I post information that I have results with. Nothing fake or phony.

I understand honey... offcourse men think from two heads.. the little one may never disagree to what you propose...Try that! LOL!

I understand honey... offcourse men think from two heads.. the little one may never disagree to what you propose...Try that! LOL! I meant TRUE that!

You can get the information from the Da'li Lhama and it still wont apply to every man and every situation because no 2 people are just alike and no 2 relationships are under the same circumstances. Im just saying that maybe you should back away from word choices that make your opinions or the opinions that work for you seem so definite.

You can get the information from the Da'li Lhama and it still wont apply to every man and every situation because no 2 people are just alike and no 2 relationships are under the same circumstances. Im just saying that maybe you should back away from word choices that make your opinions or the opinions that work for you seem so definite

SF,
I don't ASK anyone to take my ADVICE! You can READ my advice, just like I read yours or NOT. I am not BEGGING for anyone to take my advice. I know what is working for me. I also, get women who text me and tell me the advice I give works for them. So, it is ONLY ADVICE. Again, I know what I AM getting results from. The only thing I can say, is I read EVERYONE's comments. I try not to bash them, but I have my OWN OPINIONS on what works for me and other women who have have read my posts. I am not particularly asking YOU as a person to take heed to ANYTHING I have to say. With most women, what I have to say is an arguement ANYWAY until the man leaves them and then they come back and ask me for more advice that usually works for the PERSON that seeks it. NO ARGUEMENTS!

Im sure it usually works and even usually isnt definite so using words like usually is good start at using language that isnt so definitive and absolute...unless what you're saying really is absolute.

unless what you're saying really is absolute.

I GET ABSOLUTE RESULTS, so I am not dwelling on words here. Like I have said in a previous post. I don't post unless I have tired the results myself. When other women asks me for results, if they don't back down on the techniques they USUALLY get the results that they are seeking.

and you still cant admit that your advice isnt all inclusive....just if I dont agree then dont read? So you can read mine and try not to bash and just have your own opinion and state your own opinion but if Im doing the same Im wrong, have issue within myself, have low self esteem and trying to argue or did that just apply to Angel?