My Cap almost broke up with me

So my Cap sun/scorp Moon guy of 4 Years almost broke up with me last night due to a fight but then I called him and I was crying so he felt bad and said sorry. We had a conversation and everything is fine now but now I am unable to feel secure with him. I Used to think that no matter what happens we'll always be together but I was shocked last night when he said he don't want to continue our relationship, he never said such thing but last night I could feel that this wasn't said just in anger he really meant it. I can't believe something like that happened and I am now worried about our future 😢

What triggered the fight?

Posted by CAPLOCKSAID

Posted by anna1
So my Cap sun/scorp Moon guy of 4 Years almost broke up with me last night due to a fight but then I called him and I was crying so he felt bad and said sorry. We had a conversation and everything is fine now but now I am unable to feel secure with him. I Used to think that no matter what happens we'll always be together but I was shocked last night when he said he don't want to continue our relationship, he never said such thing but last night I could feel that this wasn't said just in anger he really meant it. I can't believe something like that happened and I am now worried about our future 😢

Did you make him a sandwhich with no meat ? Guys usually break up over that

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Dude.....

Posted by Ram416
What triggered the fight?

It was finance related and I used pretty harsh words but that's pretty normal due to my Aries mercury

Posted by CAPLOCKSAID

Posted by anna1
So my Cap sun/scorp Moon guy of 4 Years almost broke up with me last night due to a fight but then I called him and I was crying so he felt bad and said sorry. We had a conversation and everything is fine now but now I am unable to feel secure with him. I Used to think that no matter what happens we'll always be together but I was shocked last night when he said he don't want to continue our relationship, he never said such thing but last night I could feel that this wasn't said just in anger he really meant it. I can't believe something like that happened and I am now worried about our future 😢

Did you make him a sandwhich with no meat ? Guys usually break up over that

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Lol no, and he is a very mature guy

Why dis you accept to go back then if you don't feel secure? Men don't say that they want to break up for no reason. If it sounded like truth to you that he wanted a real break up and you guys got back together all you were doing is setting yourself up to be cheated on. Do you guys live together ?

Posted by anna1

Posted by Ram416
What triggered the fight?

It was finance related and I used pretty harsh words but that's pretty normal due to my Aries mercury

click to expand

uh....does he say harsh words, like you do to him, when he's angry?

Posted by ladylibra21
Why dis you accept to go back then if you don't feel secure? Men don't say that they want to break up for no reason. If it sounded like truth to you that he wanted a real break up and you guys got back together all you were doing is setting yourself up to be cheated on. Do you guys live together ?

Because I knew it was my mistake to begin with and I didn't wanted to lose him due to my childish behavior. Yes he sounded serious and fed up due to these fights But I Can't afford to lose him he means the world to me

Posted by SalamanderCandy

Posted by anna1

Posted by Ram416
What triggered the fight?

It was finance related and I used pretty harsh words but that's pretty normal due to my Aries mercury

uh....does he say harsh words, like you do to him, when he's angry?

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NEVER. He is Capricorn Sun/Venus/Mercury he is very careful about what he says.

Posted by anna1

Posted by ladylibra21
Why dis you accept to go back then if you don't feel secure? Men don't say that they want to break up for no reason. If it sounded like truth to you that he wanted a real break up and you guys got back together all you were doing is setting yourself up to be cheated on. Do you guys live together ?

Because I knew it was my mistake to begin with and I didn't wanted to lose him due to my childish behavior. Yes he sounded serious and fed up due to these fights But I Can't afford to lose him he means the world to me

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? In my opinion this is just me who has to always know where I stand but if it was me the next time you feel like you guys can have a calm conversation I would ask him in a calm way it without blowing up without catchin attitude what made him want to walk away because most people if they really love you don't want to leave on the first incident there is other shit that they are pondering.It is important to know where everyone's faults are so people can try to fix them and if they're not able to be fixed (and you know in your heart if you're honest with yourself) you know you cannot change then let the relationship go. I think people stay in relationships for way too long it takes for ever to voice that you don't want to be there anymore and then when someone talks you out of it you right back feeling resentful month later don't carry something out because you will miss a blessing in the end whether you think you're losing something now you will lose more in the future if one partner is in resentfulness or unhappiness

Posted by UndauntedSoul88
Caps, whether male or female, don't break up easily. It's usually building up tension for us to finally be out with it.

Maybe I'm cranky because I just woke up and have to get ready for work, but the mere idea that you cried, "he felt bad and said sorry", is a tad off-putting. Maybe because it sounds a bit manipulative. You're scared of your future together, yet weren't scared enough to bite your tongue before saying those "harsh" words?

I don't know...again, I could just be cranky, but your desired results don't exactly seem promising.

If nothing else, let this teach you to practice restraint when in an argument/disagreement. Otherwise, you'll be held accountable for what you say in the "heat of the moment"...especially with Caps. We don't forget things like that. Ever.

Yes I admit my mistake and I am trying alot not to fight and use harsh words but I regularly fail. My Aries Sun and Mercury really sucks. I am not worried about our future together I am just worried that he may break up again leaving me totally broken its my worst fear

I know that..there is some influence in the signs but...ultimately, you're still the one who chooses how to use the aries mercury.

It's not the zodiac's fault..

And I don't think it "made you" yell harsh words. :/

Just because you have a gun, doesn't mean it's okay to shoot somebody.

Especially if they aren't shooting and it's just you feeling attacked.

At least you recognize the truth about your personality and how it affects your relationship. And you're also right to feel insecure about losing him. All you can do is change now or just accept your fate.

Posted by Capri-sun

Posted by anna1

Posted by UndauntedSoul88
Caps, whether male or female, don't break up easily. It's usually building up tension for us to finally be out with it.

Maybe I'm cranky because I just woke up and have to get ready for work, but the mere idea that you cried, "he felt bad and said sorry", is a tad off-putting. Maybe because it sounds a bit manipulative. You're scared of your future together, yet weren't scared enough to bite your tongue before saying those "harsh" words?

I don't know...again, I could just be cranky, but your desired results don't exactly seem promising.

If nothing else, let this teach you to practice restraint when in an argument/disagreement. Otherwise, you'll be held accountable for what you say in the "heat of the moment"...especially with Caps. We don't forget things like that. Ever.

Yes I admit my mistake and I am trying alot not to fight and use harsh words but I regularly fail. My Aries Sun and Mercury really sucks. I am not worried about our future together I am just worried that he may break up again leaving me totally broken its my worst fear

That's why I dislike cap pairings with fire signs...they're just different energies

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OP, you should be worried about your future together because this kind of issue can't keep popping up. We don't mind working for what we want but, there needs to be progress. Constant fighting doesn't feel like that, especially if we keep rehashing the same old issues.

I dated an Aries woman for 6 years. It ended because we started fighting in year 6 about the same/ similar issues we fought about in year 1. So I would suggest that you really get to the bottom of what is bothering you and try to discuss it without making it adversarial. Oh, and you should probably wait a little while to have this talk. He sounds like he needs a breather.

Posted by Capri-sun

Posted by anna1

Posted by ladylibra21
Why dis you accept to go back then if you don't feel secure? Men don't say that they want to break up for no reason. If it sounded like truth to you that he wanted a real break up and you guys got back together all you were doing is setting yourself up to be cheated on. Do you guys live together ?

Because I knew it was my mistake to begin with and I didn't wanted to lose him due to my childish behavior. Yes he sounded serious and fed up due to these fights But I Can't afford to lose him he means the world to me

He sounds tired of fighting. That gets draining & like undaunted said it's a build up so what he said is only how he's been feeling for a while & it's just now coming out verbally.

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Yes he said he is tired of fighting he doesn't like fighting. He thinks that I am fighting while I think that he gives me reasons to fight

Posted by Capri-sun

Posted by anna1

Posted by UndauntedSoul88
Caps, whether male or female, don't break up easily. It's usually building up tension for us to finally be out with it.

Maybe I'm cranky because I just woke up and have to get ready for work, but the mere idea that you cried, "he felt bad and said sorry", is a tad off-putting. Maybe because it sounds a bit manipulative. You're scared of your future together, yet weren't scared enough to bite your tongue before saying those "harsh" words?

I don't know...again, I could just be cranky, but your desired results don't exactly seem promising.

If nothing else, let this teach you to practice restraint when in an argument/disagreement. Otherwise, you'll be held accountable for what you say in the "heat of the moment"...especially with Caps. We don't forget things like that. Ever.

Yes I admit my mistake and I am trying alot not to fight and use harsh words but I regularly fail. My Aries Sun and Mercury really sucks. I am not worried about our future together I am just worried that he may break up again leaving me totally broken its my worst fear

That's why I dislike cap pairings with fire signs...they're just different energies

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I have capricorn moon and rising and capricorn is second dominant sign in my chart but that too doesn't help

Posted by exo

Posted by anna1

Posted by Ram416
What triggered the fight?

It was finance related and I used pretty harsh words but that's pretty normal due to my Aries mercury

*cringe*

don't argue about finances/money especially with a cap.

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I was feeling that he isn't offering to help me when I am facing finantial crises even when he is capable of helping me. When we had a fight he said he didn't offer to help me because he knew that I won't accept his offer ?

Posted by Impulsv

Posted by anna1

Posted by UndauntedSoul88
Caps, whether male or female, don't break up easily. It's usually building up tension for us to finally be out with it.

Maybe I'm cranky because I just woke up and have to get ready for work, but the mere idea that you cried, "he felt bad and said sorry", is a tad off-putting. Maybe because it sounds a bit manipulative. You're scared of your future together, yet weren't scared enough to bite your tongue before saying those "harsh" words?

I don't know...again, I could just be cranky, but your desired results don't exactly seem promising.

If nothing else, let this teach you to practice restraint when in an argument/disagreement. Otherwise, you'll be held accountable for what you say in the "heat of the moment"...especially with Caps. We don't forget things like that. Ever.

Yes I admit my mistake and I am trying alot not to fight and use harsh words but I regularly fail. My Aries Sun and Mercury really sucks. I am not worried about our future together I am just worried that he may break up again leaving me totally broken its my worst fear

I'm telling you your relationship would be a nightmare always working on eggshells because this instead of mad can't deal with one bad incident

Art of marriage and relationship is forgiveness

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I can forgive and I have forgiven him numerous times but its hard for me to forget whenever something similar happens it triggers those memories

Posted by daron76

Posted by Capri-sun

Posted by anna1

Posted by UndauntedSoul88
Caps, whether male or female, don't break up easily. It's usually building up tension for us to finally be out with it.

Maybe I'm cranky because I just woke up and have to get ready for work, but the mere idea that you cried, "he felt bad and said sorry", is a tad off-putting. Maybe because it sounds a bit manipulative. You're scared of your future together, yet weren't scared enough to bite your tongue before saying those "harsh" words?

I don't know...again, I could just be cranky, but your desired results don't exactly seem promising.

If nothing else, let this teach you to practice restraint when in an argument/disagreement. Otherwise, you'll be held accountable for what you say in the "heat of the moment"...especially with Caps. We don't forget things like that. Ever.

Yes I admit my mistake and I am trying alot not to fight and use harsh words but I regularly fail. My Aries Sun and Mercury really sucks. I am not worried about our future together I am just worried that he may break up again leaving me totally broken its my worst fear

That's why I dislike cap pairings with fire signs...they're just different energies

OP, you should be worried about your future together because this kind of issue can't keep popping up. We don't mind working for what we want but, there needs to be progress. Constant fighting doesn't feel like that, especially if we keep rehashing the same old issues.

I dated an Aries woman for 6 years. It ended because we started fighting in year 6 about the same/ similar issues we fought about in year 1. So I would suggest that you really get to the bottom of what is bothering you and try to discuss it without making it adversarial. Oh, and you should probably wait a little while to have this talk. He sounds like he needs a breather.

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Yes this. Its been 4 years and we are fighting on the same old issues I feel like everytime I try to forget about those things he again starts doing same things.

Posted by leowww
What if you didn't call him and cried?

What do you think would have happened?

I am unable to imagine that or maybe I just don't want to imagine that. He seemed damn serious so I was totally broken I didn't know what to do I just called to ask him if he said those things just in anger and while asking I couldn't control myself

Posted by DivaCanLeo

Posted by anna1

Posted by UndauntedSoul88
Caps, whether male or female, don't break up easily. It's usually building up tension for us to finally be out with it.

Maybe I'm cranky because I just woke up and have to get ready for work, but the mere idea that you cried, "he felt bad and said sorry", is a tad off-putting. Maybe because it sounds a bit manipulative. You're scared of your future together, yet weren't scared enough to bite your tongue before saying those "harsh" words?

I don't know...again, I could just be cranky, but your desired results don't exactly seem promising.

If nothing else, let this teach you to practice restraint when in an argument/disagreement. Otherwise, you'll be held accountable for what you say in the "heat of the moment"...especially with Caps. We don't forget things like that. Ever.

Yes I admit my mistake and I am trying alot not to fight and use harsh words but I regularly fail. My Aries Sun and Mercury really sucks. I am not worried about our future together I am just worried that he may break up again leaving me totally broken its my worst fear

it'll happen he's a scorpio moon



he probably got someone else in the background already

i would cut before he does.

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So you are saying that scorp moons are unfaithful ?

Posted by cheekyfaerie
Your Cap didn't *almost* break up with you. He did. Break up with you.

Two scenarios. Either he felt bad for saying it and immediately wanted to take it back anyway or he felt sorry for you and took you back cause he felt bad. In the former, he's probably still gonna have some lingering thoughts about whether or not this is right. In the latter, respect is gone.

I wouldn't feel secure at all right now, if I were you.

I think its latter 😢

Posted by sakuraflowers

Posted by anna1


Yes I admit my mistake and I am trying alot not to fight and use harsh words but I regularly fail. My Aries Sun and Mercury really sucks. I am not worried about our future together I am just worried that he may break up again leaving me totally broken its my worst fear

When you're really angry, I would go silent. Go silent whenever possible. Leave the room for a while and cool down first.

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Yes, I'll have to do that if I want to save my relationship.thanks for helpful advice

Posted by leowww

Posted by anna1

Posted by leowww
What if you didn't call him and cried?

What do you think would have happened?

I am unable to imagine that or maybe I just don't want to imagine that. He seemed damn serious so I was totally broken I didn't know what to do I just called to ask him if he said those things just in anger and while asking I couldn't control myself

I understand.

I think that's what I would be thinking about.

Mature people just don't break it off on a whim like that....

Hopefully you're both able to talk about it and maybe hopefully quiet your mind.

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I asked him today if he really meant what he said last night and said no he has spent 4 years with me and that he can't break up at this stage he said we'll be together forever but still I am feeling insecure because I could feel the seriousness when he said he don't wañt to continue

Posted by sakuraflowers

Posted by cheekyfaerie
Your Cap didn't *almost* break up with you. He did. Break up with you.

Two scenarios. Either he felt bad for saying it and immediately wanted to take it back anyway or he felt sorry for you and took you back cause he felt bad. In the former, he's probably still gonna have some lingering thoughts about whether or not this is right. In the latter, respect is gone.

I wouldn't feel secure at all right now, if I were you.

Still leaves a chance to explain ... if OP decides to take it... imo

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What do you mean by that. I didn't understand

Posted by Capri-sun
1. Have you declined his help (in anything) in the past?

2. No one is a mind reader. If you need help, ask.

1. Yes almost always but those were different scenarios

Posted by Capri-sun

Posted by anna1

Posted by UndauntedSoul88
Caps, whether male or female, don't break up easily. It's usually building up tension for us to finally be out with it.

Maybe I'm cranky because I just woke up and have to get ready for work, but the mere idea that you cried, "he felt bad and said sorry", is a tad off-putting. Maybe because it sounds a bit manipulative. You're scared of your future together, yet weren't scared enough to bite your tongue before saying those "harsh" words?

I don't know...again, I could just be cranky, but your desired results don't exactly seem promising.

If nothing else, let this teach you to practice restraint when in an argument/disagreement. Otherwise, you'll be held accountable for what you say in the "heat of the moment"...especially with Caps. We don't forget things like that. Ever.

Yes I admit my mistake and I am trying alot not to fight and use harsh words but I regularly fail. My Aries Sun and Mercury really sucks. I am not worried about our future together I am just worried that he may break up again leaving me totally broken its my worst fear

That's why I dislike cap pairings with fire signs...they're just different energies

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My thoughts exactly. My mom is Cappy my oldest sister is Aries. Talk about gas and TNT! 😱

Cyber hugs! 🤗

Love,

Eva

Posted by cheekyfaerie

Posted by anna1

Posted by leowww

Posted by anna1

Posted by leowww
What if you didn't call him and cried?

What do you think would have happened?

I am unable to imagine that or maybe I just don't want to imagine that. He seemed damn serious so I was totally broken I didn't know what to do I just called to ask him if he said those things just in anger and while asking I couldn't control myself

I understand.

I think that's what I would be thinking about.

Mature people just don't break it off on a whim like that....

Hopefully you're both able to talk about it and maybe hopefully quiet your mind.

I asked him today if he really meant what he said last night and said no he has spent 4 years with me and that he can't break up at this stage he said we'll be together forever but still I am feeling insecure because I could feel the seriousness when he said he don't wañt to continue

This is promising. It sounds like he still wants to work on things. You two have to learn to communicate better tho. There's stability and there's stagnancy. Notice how one sounds positive and comforting and the other doesn't. You don't wanna be stuck in this cycle and neither does he. Learn how to fix it or be prepared for him to rip the cord again.

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Yeah. Another thing he said last night which i didn't understand was that he will wait for me till 10th december to change my thinking after that I shouldn't expect any thing from him. I am unable to understand that deadline

Posted by Capri-sun

Posted by anna1

Posted by leowww

Posted by anna1

Posted by leowww
What if you didn't call him and cried?

What do you think would have happened?

I am unable to imagine that or maybe I just don't want to imagine that. He seemed damn serious so I was totally broken I didn't know what to do I just called to ask him if he said those things just in anger and while asking I couldn't control myself

I understand.

I think that's what I would be thinking about.

Mature people just don't break it off on a whim like that....

Hopefully you're both able to talk about it and maybe hopefully quiet your mind.

I asked him today if he really meant what he said last night and said no he has spent 4 years with me and that he can't break up at this stage he said we'll be together forever but still I am feeling insecure because I could feel the seriousness when he said he don't wañt to continue

That's because that's how he felt in that moment. Imo if he was serious about being done, he wouldn't have taken you back. Tears or not

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That gives me a bit hope.

Posted by sakuraflowers

Posted by anna1

Posted by cheekyfaerie

Posted by anna1

Posted by leowww

Posted by anna1

Posted by leowww
What if you didn't call him and cried?

What do you think would have happened?

I am unable to imagine that or maybe I just don't want to imagine that. He seemed damn serious so I was totally broken I didn't know what to do I just called to ask him if he said those things just in anger and while asking I couldn't control myself

I understand.

I think that's what I would be thinking about.

Mature people just don't break it off on a whim like that....

Hopefully you're both able to talk about it and maybe hopefully quiet your mind.

I asked him today if he really meant what he said last night and said no he has spent 4 years with me and that he can't break up at this stage he said we'll be together forever but still I am feeling insecure because I could feel the seriousness when he said he don't wañt to continue

This is promising. It sounds like he still wants to work on things. You two have to learn to communicate better tho. There's stability and there's stagnancy. Notice how one sounds positive and comforting and the other doesn't. You don't wanna be stuck in this cycle and neither does he. Learn how to fix it or be prepared for him to rip the cord again.

Yeah. Another thing he said last night which i didn't understand was that he will wait for me till 10th december to change my thinking after that I shouldn't expect any thing from him. I am unable to understand that deadline

So he's giving you until December 10th to think and see if you would understand his thinking, OP? Did I understand that right? @cheekyfaerie 🤔

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He said that in anger last night that he don't want to continue our relationship like this and that he will wait for me till 10 december to change my thinking about him.

Unfortunately, nothing is certain. Knowing that anyone's relationship can end at any moment is a reminder to value and cherish what you have and not be careless or take the bond for granted. Effort must be put in. People can change their minds.

I read everything & this is what I came up with. He meant what he said when he broke up with u. He's truly tired of the fighting & u not accepting any help from him, not sure if its financial or something else... Cap men are steady creatures. This Cap sounds done otherwise he wouldn't have given u an ultimatum. As a fellow Aries, I don't do ultimatums. Instead of living in fear of your relationship getting broken up on a certain date , communicate calmly to him .. Calm, cool, collected.. This can be hard for an Aries when they are hurt & angry. Communication is key .. I wish I could say that this is going to work but I don't know hunnie it doesn't sound too good. Good luck Aries lady!

Damn, he gave you an ultimatum? As others have said, that's your cue to exit, stage left. Why? first of all, he wouldn't tolerate you placing an ultimatum on him (he knows that btw). He shouldn't be dishing out what he knows he can't take. Second, its selfish and puts the responsibility for things getting better all on you (which is total BS)- which, again, he knows. Finally, you have to stand up for yourself. People will walk all over you for as long as you will let hem, regardless of astrology. If you lose someone for standing up for yourself, then that person wasn't really there for you anyway.

I'm offended for you lol. I'm not quick to tell my significant other "fuck you" but that ultimatum crap would get me there. That asshat even picked a specific day?!?!? FOH hahaaaa

You're getting in arguments with him and being

ugly to him because he won't give you money--

or rather, 'help you financially.'



Explain, please. .. tbh I wouldn't put up with that.

If I was him I mean.

Like @cheekyfaerie and others have said, sounds like he is wussing out on cutting the cord. Its a coward move but everybody makes mistakes.

Either way, its a done deal. He is trying to get you to walk away and you are staying there getting disrespected. Again, money or not, you have to have some self respect and leave. If you stay, he will conclude its only for the money- he knows he is treating you like shit. And that's when it will get really ugly. You might as well wear a shit saying "manipulate me please".

Posted by Gob_Shite
One thing I've noticed about Aries women is that they expect their partner to 'take care of them' - not in a mutually supportive manner but more father-to-child. Probably such expectations began to grate on the Cap?

Not my experience, our issue was trust- i.e. rash behavior - lead to me not trusting her enough to open up- which then lead to her not trusting me. Nasty cycle, that. Anyway- I think in this case you may be right.

Posted by CAPLOCKSAID

Posted by sakuraflowers

Posted by CAPLOCKSAID

Posted by sakuraflowers

Posted by CAPLOCKSAID
That's why i joke around and OP giggled.....

8 pages of non sense woman shoving shit in OPs head.

He broke up simply because he was upset.

If the argument was about finances, he probably felt unworthy or unable to provide or is stressed out about finances.

For some Caps no matter how much they already have, working just gives us a sense of security. We like to be able to provide for people we care about. Aka ( The Father of the zodiac)

I believe 2 Cap guys commented as well in those 8 pages of "nonsense". However if you believed it to be not true, you're more than welcome to say otherwise, rather than sitting there and judge, perhaps earlier than page 8. It gives people more to learn about Caps in general, no? I am always interested to hear opinions that differ my own.

🤗

No. But judge based on facts

No to which? No to that your feedback would help people learn more about Caps in general? If thats the case, I beg to differ. Cap board does not have a whole lot of Cap guys that provides feedback on such threads. It has been like that for a while now.

As long as i made OP laugh, my job is done. All i hope is that they talk things out.

I officially revoke my Cap card and nominate you to speak on my behalf on this board. I will summon you if need be. See ya. 🤗

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I miss your great advice @caplocksaid ‼️

Posted by sakuraflowers

Posted by JohnTheBaptist100
At the end of the day all the cap is doing is finishing off what he already started...

The OP knowing that he was about to finish with her for good brought out the manipulation and crocodile tears...

So the cap then "surrendered" to calm things down and now that he is calm he has decided on an ultimatum instead which will put the blame on her as he knows that during the four years she has fucked up on this same behaviour patten all the time and he has now had enough...

So either way, the result will be the same... The relationship TERMINATED. It does not work...

A person should never come between a cap and his finances.. Perhaps the aries sees him as a bank and has been constantly using him and taking him for granted financially and he has had enough...

It's OVER OP.

The ultimatum happened prior to her crying and him apologizing, if I understood correctly because OP said it happened last night (which was also when the fight happened).

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Yes the ultimatum to break up happened immediately after the fight

Posted by leowww
I'm so lost.

Didn't he say he'll stay with you "forever" cause "he can't break up" .... I still think it's weird that he said that... So what's this December 10th drama?

Why are you depending on him financially?

I am not depending on him financially. and I have never accepted any help from him financially, I just wanted him to be thoughtful enough to offer. accepting or not is another story

Posted by cheekyfaerie

Posted by Gob_Shite
One thing I've noticed about Aries women is that they expect their partner to 'take care of them' - not in a mutually supportive manner but more father-to-child. Probably such expectations began to grate on the Cap?

I'm baffled too. She says he's offered before, but she was too proud to accept. This time she was upset he didn't offer? But this is the problem with trying to play online therapy session. Only parts of the puzzle are revealed.

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Yes he did offered many times before but I didn't accepted saying that I don't want his favor because I didn't wanted him to think that I am with him for money and all. I have seen many girls using there guys just for money and I didn't want him to think that I am the same Still I was happy that he offers me to help. Its not even about money its about how much he cares for me

Posted by sakuraflowers

Posted by leowww

Posted by sakuraflowers
@leowww

Posted by anna1
Yeah. Another thing he said last night which i didn't understand was that he will wait for me till 10th december to change my thinking after that I shouldn't expect any thing from him. I am unable to understand that deadline

I missed that... Thx...

That deadline doesn't look good.. So much for forever...

Well, I think it happened like fight, then ultimatum, and then him apologizing and saying he'll stay with her forever. But with the fight and the ultimatum happened shortly after one another, it just makes me think it's what he'd do in such a scenario such that he would not be hurting her and looking like the bad guy.

I've had Caps lie to me before simply because they didn't want to hurt my feelings, so I cannot rule that possibility out. 😢

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Yes It happened immediately after the fight then he apologized. Still I don't understand why he chose that specific day but after he apologized I asked him what was that 10th December thing and he said it just came to my mind and I said nothing special

Posted by Gob_Shite
One thing I've noticed about Aries women is that they expect their partner to 'take care of them' - not in a mutually supportive manner but more father-to-child. Probably such expectations began to grate on the Cap?

Yes to the first part I want my partner to be caring towards me, and NO to the second part I believe in mutual care one time when he wasn't able to purchase a new cell phone and his old one was not working properly I offered my brand new cell to him to use until he purchases his own. He didn't accept the offer that was another thing but I tried to help him when he needed. The purpose of telling you this is that I don't expect what I can't give

Posted by daron76
If you stay, he will conclude its only for the money- he knows he is treating you like shit. And that's when it will get really ugly. You might as well wear a shit saying "manipulate me please".

No he will never conclude that because he knows I am not with him for money I have rejected his offer many times which led to some fights as well. After that whole break up thing when we were having the conversation he said he didn't offer me because he knew I won't accept his offer and will say that I don't need any favor and then he will feel bad that's why he didn't offer. He even said that that he feel like he is "Dummy" because I don't let him help me. Those were his exact words

Posted by tiziani
Honestly, it just sounds like you guys are still fighting. And you're obviously both hurt. Everything else is speculation. If you don't feel secure then confront that and what you need.

Yes and I unintentionally used harsh words which may have hurt him. I am seriously unable to control myself when I am angry

Posted by sakuraflowers

Posted by Gob_Shite
One thing I've noticed about Aries women is that they expect their partner to 'take care of them' - not in a mutually supportive manner but more father-to-child. Probably such expectations began to grate on the Cap?

In general, if anything, it's that Aries don't want help or being taken care of. But expectations though, is a different story. That might have been a factor.

click to expand

Yes I don't want him to think that he is being used for money but do expect him to offer me atleast

Posted by Shadowcat
OP during this fight did you throw his failures in his face? If so, then that kind of changes things.

No I didn't say anything like that but I did use harsh language when accusing him of not offering help.

Posted by sakuraflowers

Posted by cheekyfaerie

Posted by Gob_Shite
One thing I've noticed about Aries women is that they expect their partner to 'take care of them' - not in a mutually supportive manner but more father-to-child. Probably such expectations began to grate on the Cap?

I'm baffled too. She says he's offered before, but she was too proud to accept. This time she was upset he didn't offer? But this is the problem with trying to play online therapy session. Only parts of the puzzle are revealed.

It's more likely the expectation of equal responsibility ... she didn't want help but expected him to contribute...

IMO

click to expand

This

Posted by CAPLOCKSAID
That's why i joke around and OP giggled.....

8 pages of non sense woman shoving shit in OPs head.

He broke up simply because he was upset.

If the argument was about finances, he probably felt unworthy or unable to provide or is stressed out about finances.

For some Caps no matter how much they already have, working just gives us a sense of security. We like to be able to provide for people we care about. Aka ( The Father of the zodiac)

He is able to provide me but he didn't offer because I have rejected him offer many times. OH GOD it sounds so bad when I am writing this it helped me understand my mistake. When he offers I reject him and now when he doesn't offer I am baffled as to why he didn't. After apologizing for breakup thing we had a brief conversation on phone and he told me the same thing he said "Remember those times when I offered to help and you didn't accept you said I don't need your favors that's why I didn't offer today and you are fighting on this too I feel like a Dummy who can't do anything for you I feel useless. You said I didn't offer because I care about money ? Its been 4 years we are together and still you didn't understand me even 20 % " After this conversation I understood that I was clearly wrong here. I feel so bad for using harsh language

Posted by CAPLOCKSAID
It doesn't change the fact that he loves you and still wants to be with you. His self esteem probably got shot.

Give him some space. Let him cool down. Simple as that.

Yeah he is now back to treating me special, Saying I Love you like 4 times a day and saying that he can't live without me and everything is back to normal like before. but deep down in my heart I have started to fear the real breakup because I am unable to control myself when I am angry or hurt. I may trigger a real breakup 😢

Posted by anna1


I have never accepted any help from him financially, I just wanted him to be thoughtful enough to offer.

he didn't offer because I have rejected him offer many times.

When he offers I reject him and now when he doesn't offer I am baffled as to why he didn't.

he said "Remember those times when I offered to help and you didn't accept you said I don't need your favors that's why I didn't offer today..."

I did use harsh language when accusing him of not offering help.

You can't be that dense, can you??!

You expect him to read your mind when your behavior countless times before has trained him NOT to offer himself...as you will simply reject him. And yet you throw a tantrum when he doesn't reach out towards the open flame that has burned him so many times in the past.

Seriously dude?!

It's no wonder he's fed up and wants out. Your needy and bipolar. Telling him that you don't want anything from him, and yet getting angry and lashing out at him when he follows what you've told him and doesn't offer. Sheesh! There's really no winning with you.