Leo - Fear of Commitment?

I'm a Leo. Aries rising and aries moon. On average my relationships last for a week or 2. I don't date many people because i don't like most of the guys who hit on me.

I really want to settle down, get married, have kids and live happily ever after... but i can't make my relationships last for very long. I either drive them away or run for the hills. I dive head first into relationships with my eyes closed. Then i open them, don't like what i see and move on. Or, maybe i get scared of being hurt to i leave before that happens. Do other Leo's do this?

leos, have no fears towards commitment. We love to be *in love* with the right person. I think that is your aries rising/moon that's flipping your mind out. If you dont find a balance between the two you will be travelling down a rocky road of no love to be found.

How old are you? and why do you go into a relationship with closed eyes, thats crazy! Open your eyes before you leap, that way your not wasting anyone time. And you say you dont like what you see with them once you open your eyes, well it might go the same way for you on their end. You bail out way to early on to even find out about the guy, what are you so afraid of.

Have you ever had a serious relationship?

I don't think it's so much a fear of commitment because i really want that. I think its a fear of commitment with the wrong one and wasting time on a relationship you know isn't "the one". The eyes closed thing is going into it all optimistic then realising i'm seeing what i want to see and not the reality of it all.

I'm 27 and no is the answer to the serious relationship thing. I'm tough and independent and ambitious and seem to attract guys who are weak and needy and not going anywhere and i know i don't want that. Maybe it is an aries thing. I need to slow down with everything. Maybe i'm better off alone. Thanks for the advice. Needed it... having one of those crazy life dramas where nothing makes sense anymore.

you will find someone, most likely when you arent looking too. I think you may be attracting the weak and needy men because you may come across as very strong and independent, we tend to do that without even realizing it. that can be intimidating to some men, or they think that you dont need them because you tend to do everything for yourself. I have learned as I get older, that I have to let the man be the man, and stay out of the way. its a hard thing to do, to hand control over to someone else, but this is one of the things I have had to do. I see its much better that way, and i cant understand why i didnt understand that sooner.

The eyes closed thing is going into it all optimistic then realising i'm seeing what i want to see and not the reality of it all.

Im a very optimistic person and i have never just dived into a relationship with my eyes closed, you are only blinding yourself to the possibilities of true love. You use *optimistics* as your diversion, but its more than that.

So if you fear of being with the wrong one, dont date. Just get to know the person for awhile as *friends* and then see if the both of you would like to take it to another level. Start off as friends and just hang out from time to time, no pressures no commitments. Just enjoy!



I'm 27 and no is the answer to the serious relationship thing.....( So why would you want to be in a relationship, what would you bring to the table?))

I'm tough and independent and ambitious and seem to attract guys who are weak and needy and not going anywhere and i know i don't want that...((If you are attracting these types of guys that mean that there is something within yourself as to why you are not attracting the tough, independent type))) you need to do some soul searching!

Maybe it is an aries thing.((INDEED IT IS))) I need to slow down with everything. Maybe i'm better off alone. ((EXACTLY))FIND out who you are 1st and foremost before you go and judge these guys, thinking they are not the one for you, they see strength and you see weakness. You can help them along the way to better them, just as they may be able to help you in areas of your life.

let me ask you this, if you find a strong,ambitious type..then what are you going to do with him? you need to think about this as well.

good luck to you somechick..

somechick, are you sure it's a fear of commitment that drives this behavior? there are a number of other reasons that you could shy away from serious relationships.

it sounds to me like you just haven't met someone who's right for you yet. on the plus side, it's good that you don't settle for a relationship that you're not satisfied with.

rather than jumping in with your eyes closed, maybe you should try to approach relationships more slowly and honestly. keep qualities that you would need in a long-term partner at the forefront when considering getting involved with someone. and don't waste time on those who don't meet your most important requirements.

oh well...gues i'm a weirdo. but that's cool. i like who i am.

You're not weird you have standards, and by some luck of fate the universe likes to make all the bad apples run from you. I'm sure you'll find the right one some day. Until then just have fun, you can't find love it finds you. I know corny as hell but whatev 😛

I think Leos do alot of things on impulse, including jump into relationships. It seems like Leos are either extremely picky, date lots of people and explore, while yet still technically being single through it all, until they find the right match (with no shame in their game for taking all of the benefits of fooling around with others) OR they completely latch on to the first catch & end up having 100 little small & failed relationships back to back.

Leos aren't afraid of commitment. If anything, Leos love companionship & crave to have that one person that actually understands them & still loves them after seeing their true colors. But, Leos are extremely & secretely very picky & won't just fall for anybody. They see good in any & everybody, but that doesn't necessarily mean that the "goods" will be good enough for them to see you for long-term use (which is why alot of Leos have been known for leading others on). It's hard to tell when a Leo really likes you sometimes b/c you wonder if they're spending all of this time with you and/or sweet talking b/c they really like you or if this is just how they are with everyone in general. Leos are generally content when they are dating lots of different people b/c atleast they are still getting some of the benefits of what a relationship brings (sex, spending time with the opposite sex, escapades,etc.) And they actually take relationships very seriously. It's getting them to WANT you for a relationship that's the hardest part. It's not that they don't want commitment, they just may not want YOU BAD enough & aren't willing to take that leap of faith on something that doesn't look promising enough. And of course, others always take this as them fearing commitment when it's really them believing they are sparing YOU the heartbreak or waste of time

I think Leos do alot of things on impulse, including jump into relationships.

Kyr, i agree with the 1st line, i do act on impulse at times, but when i act like that i have already am aware of what im getting myself into,my instincts have never proved me wrong..... but never have i jumped into a relationship just for the hell of it. I refuse to settle for just anything.



It seems like Leos are either extremely picky, date lots of people and explore, while yet still technically being single through it all, until they find the right match (with no shame in their game for taking all of the benefits of fooling around with others)

I dont think leos are the only picky sign and why not be picky, dont we as people have a right to pick, choose and explore the human nature on earth. Im pretty since you are a aquarius you hold some standards as well, correct? And also, everyone has taken some benefits of a package at some point in their life, so you are telling me you have never taken some benefits from someone or something?



And they actually take relationships very seriously. It's getting them to WANT you for a relationship that's the hardest part. It's not that they don't want commitment, they just may not want YOU BAD enough & aren't willing to take that leap of faith on something that doesn't look promising enough. And of course, others always take this as them fearing commitment when it's really them believing they are sparing YOU the heartbreak or waste of time

Now this statement i agree wholeheartly, because i havent and will never lead someone into thinking that we are going to be in a relationship, playing with people hearts and minds isnt in my daily agenda, because Karma will leap back onto you and catch you with your pants down and have you on your knees, begging..WHY ME!! To me a persons heart is very delicate and tender so i dont play with them, because i want to reap the goodness back not the badness.

I am a very upfront person if i meet someone and they start to think that we are going to be exclusive without actually communicating with me about the situation, well i have to bust their bubble and let them know that i just want to be friends, lets just hang out and have fun when we can. But if they cannot handle just being friends, well i understand that as well...so the open door of opportunities is open for them to walk away with no hurt feelings. Im a nurturer by heart, soul and spirit so i am tender with people emoti

emotions and feelings. That is nothing to be toyed with.

And yes getting us to want someone as much as they might desire us, can be a handful at times!! but when you are honest and let the other person know where you are coming from early on in the mist of the *friendship* all can work out well for both parties.

I have been single for 4 1/2yrs, was in a relationship for 6yrs..so i look at this time in my life as a breather for my own pleasure and fullfillment of life and a healing process, so when i do actually meet someone i want to become close with i/we will make it happen, without a doubt in my mind. So my search is still on. My time is valuable, so why waste it on going through meaningless relationships, when i can pick the right one and stay together for long term. If i dont see long-term with someone when i meet or get to know them....why proceed?

And for sweet talking, you seriously cannot do that to everyone you meet....i dont, i just tell it like it is. Either i want you or i dont, plain and simple. For muah i only see (black & white)no in betweens, only the strong will survive in my camp.

are you still with your leo, kyr?

Ok... so other leo's are like this too. It's not just me. I didn't know if it was fear of commitment or just not finding the right one. It's hard to distinguish. I don't want to be in a relationship with just anyone. I am picky... it sucks. I'm not perfect, just like everyone else...but i want someone who is.

somechick...the answer to your questions is the fact that you have your Saturn in Libra. How do I know this? You're 27 yrs. old (as am I), which means that you were born with the same Saturn placement (as was I) in Libra. I don't know if you know anything about the planet Saturn in the birthchart, what it signifies, or the Saturn return; but you should look into it. My suggesstions:

-Liz Greene "Saturn: A new look at an old Devil"
-Sherene Schostak & Stephanie Iris Weiss: "Surviving the Saturn Return"
-http://www.saturnreturn.net/<BR>
I've been dealing with the SAME exact issues. I have my Sun in Leo/Moon in Aries as well. Our Saturn return is approaching (Saturn moves into the sign of Libra this October, and Saturn will "return" to the exact position it was in on the day we were born by the time we turn age 29). So issues regarding relationships are going to occupy the majority of our thoughts, especially w/ Neptune, Jupiter and Chiron all in the sign of Aquarius this year (our opposite/relationship sign). Do a search of what I've mentioned above, and feel free to PM me to discuss more (if you want). I've been obsessing over all this, and it's getting to be a bit annoying...but at least I can share what I've learned over the years. Good luck :-)

thanks for the advice/insight truth. I am never really concerned with relationships...i'm good at being single and drown myself in my work. The only reason i've been confused lately is because i sold my business so work is gone and because of the venus retrograde and meeting a libra who is ruled by this annoying planet. it confused the absolute shit out of me and did my head in like crazy. i'm usually very detatched from emotion.... a bit of a pitfall... but i think the venus retrograde thing ruined me...it made me think about commitment, about not wanting it but also wanting it, being afraid of getting into it and all that other stuff. i'm picking up the peices and trying to put my feet back on the ground.

boys suck! i think i might start batting for the other team.

i know a little about the saturn return stuff (not much) but will look further into it.

lol. thanks. i don't think i'd mind a peaceful relationship. the last one was with a libra, they invented the rollercoaster and that just drove me INSANE. now i like a cancer but i work with him... so not too sure about taking it further than friends. actually i want to. and i will... im practicing patience and taking it slowly instead of 5000000000miles an hour for a change. the innocent flirting and building tension is rather exciting. i only work with him on wednesdays so there is a big gap between seeing eachother but we message eachother on facebook inbetween. i'm going to build a strong foundation and try for long term

yeah, i would agree that it has to do with ur aries side. i know a couple of aries and they pretty much only date. aries and leos are very picky i think but aries come off as more commitment-phobic. i LOVE being in love and have no problems committing... as long as it is to the right person. actually, i commit regardless but it may be short lived when i realize ur not it; meaning that i'm faithful while in a relationship.

Posted by krysrenee7
I think Leos do alot of things on impulse, including jump into relationships. It seems like Leos are either extremely picky, date lots of people and explore, while yet still technically being single through it all, until they find the right match (with no shame in their game for taking all of the benefits of fooling around with others) OR they completely latch on to the first catch & end up having 100 little small & failed relationships back to back.

Leos aren't afraid of commitment. If anything, Leos love companionship & crave to have that one person that actually understands them & still loves them after seeing their true colors. But, Leos are extremely & secretely very picky & won't just fall for anybody. They see good in any & everybody, but that doesn't necessarily mean that the "goods" will be good enough for them to see you for long-term use (which is why alot of Leos have been known for leading others on). It's hard to tell when a Leo really likes you sometimes b/c you wonder if they're spending all of this time with you and/or sweet talking b/c they really like you or if this is just how they are with everyone in general. Leos are generally content when they are dating lots of different people b/c atleast they are still getting some of the benefits of what a relationship brings (sex, spending time with the opposite sex, escapades,etc.) And they actually take relationships very seriously. It's getting them to WANT you for a relationship that's the hardest part. It's not that they don't want commitment, they just may not want YOU BAD enough & aren't willing to take that leap of faith on something that doesn't look promising enough. And of course, others always take this as them fearing commitment when it's really them believing they are sparing YOU the heartbreak or waste of time

EXTREMELY TRUE. MY EX WAS EXACTLY LIKE THAT.

yeah, i'm not quite that impulsive. maybe because i'm on the cusp of virgo so i tend to analyze a lot...

honestly, i think u should stop for a moment. figure urself out first. u say u know what u want but i call bullshit on this. it sounds like u have ur own baggage to sort through before u can expect a mature relationship to develop with someone else. once u know who u really are, what u really want, and what u really stand for then everything else will fall into place.

eh I think the question should stay open bc Im 25 leo sun virgo moon and pisces ascendaant. I feel yhe same way??_ that Im afraid of commitment, even though I do enjoy it. I feel that after a while I maay be getting borwd or like its not for me.

Posted by Isosceleese
you will find someone, most likely when you arent looking too. I think you may be attracting the weak and needy men because you may come across as very strong and independent, we tend to do that without even realizing it. that can be intimidating to some men, or they think that you dont need them because you tend to do everything for yourself. I have learned as I get older, that I have to let the man be the man, and stay out of the way. its a hard thing to do, to hand control over to someone else, but this is one of the things I have had to do. I see its much better that way, and i cant understand why i didnt understand that sooner.

Quoted for truth.
I have nothing to add.

Posted by somechick
Ok... so other leo's are like this too. It's not just me. I didn't know if it was fear of commitment or just not finding the right one. It's hard to distinguish. I don't want to be in a relationship with just anyone. I am picky... it sucks. I'm not perfect, just like everyone else...but i want someone who is.

LOL!!! I was with a Taurus (Moon in Leo) and this sounds like him. Oh he broke my heart. we had a tru Fairytale relationship for a year. His family loved me, mine loved him, we traveled...he gave me everything I wanted.....and more. I just knew he was the one. We had a great time together didnt fight too much....but I think we got too serious and he got scared (wasnt my fault we were Naturally Magnetic)...he told me he wasnt sure about us anymore. And that he Loved me more than he loved any other woman, but that he wants to be single. Oh I was so hurt, can you imagine? and after the breakup he still wanted to take me out and around his family and do things for me ( and make sure no other men were around) Im 28 and he is 40.....I dont think I will Love like that again (iM A Cancer (moon in Sag)....I love hard)
Tootles

i think it's a combination of two fire signs. aries has a lot to do with but leo is at fault as well. leos fall easily but unlike their opposite, aqua, the "fall" has little or nothing to do with their partner. when you open your eyes, the reason why you don't like what you see is because you haven't taken the time to befriend the person you're dealing with. leos love being being in love. when the REAL work sets in, many of them run for the hills. that's why they're on a perpetual chase.

i dated a leo and i dated an aqua. i've always said if i could merge the two, i'd have the perfect man. leos could learn A LOT from your opposite...aqua. through aquarius you will learn the value of friendship. aquarius can learn the value of passionate love through leo. you can't have one without the other.

i would suggest that the next time you meet a guy, you make a conscious effort to get to know him. no sex...just getting to know him. dating, listening, learning. while simultaneously sharing parts of you that go beyond the superficial. leo's want the fairytale but when they're ready for something true, they chuck the fairytale and go after what's real.