Tee
@Tee
9 YearsGemini
Comments: 0 · Posts: 24 · Topics: 2
Help please!
I say "I hope you're alright" and again... nothing.
Phew, I'm sorry that was so long! But I have no idea what to do now. I know I don't want to contact him again. I've deleted his number and deleted him off snapchat. Am I just overreacting?
Phew, I'm sorry that was so long! But I have no idea what to do now. I know I don't want to contact him again. I've deleted his number and deleted him off snapchat. Am I just overreacting?
Posted by tizianiNo I did not. What I would have wanted is for us to continue dating, spending time and getting to know each other...
Did you get what you wanted? Is the question.
And do you know what you're looking for?
What I am looking for is companionship and possibly a relationship down the road.
Posted by leow31Okay, I won't. D;
Don't contact him again.
Follow your instinct.
What do you mean "Of course we had sex." Not all women give it up so fast. Those of us who don't are the ones men respect, pursue and marry. Men don't want to a make an "easy" lay their woman; didn't you know that when you gave it up?
It's cool, but usually when women have sex fast with a guy they have come to terms with the fact that "this is just going to be a good time."
If you want to be serious with a man, make sure he wants the same thing, and don't sleep with him too fast. Obey the 90 days rule. Within 90-days you will see who he really is, and what he really wants. But he sees you as a loose woman who will give it up too easily. HE got what he wanted and baby-girl this is a wrap. He's not pulling a disappearing act, he has disappeared, until the next time he wants to have sex.
It's cool, but usually when women have sex fast with a guy they have come to terms with the fact that "this is just going to be a good time."
If you want to be serious with a man, make sure he wants the same thing, and don't sleep with him too fast. Obey the 90 days rule. Within 90-days you will see who he really is, and what he really wants. But he sees you as a loose woman who will give it up too easily. HE got what he wanted and baby-girl this is a wrap. He's not pulling a disappearing act, he has disappeared, until the next time he wants to have sex.
I agree w what Librawoman said. You have to make your worth known. If you want a relationship you should have waited to fvck because how are you gunna expect a relationship from someone you don't even know? For all you know you two could be super incompatible.
If you're just looking for fun that's fine. But clearly you are not so the golden rule is 3 months girl. I met this guy and we dated for a month, we had sooooooooooooooo much in common, and he would have been the perfect bf but it turned out our morals compasses did not align! I'm not gunna date someone like that so I cut it off and the o my way I figured that out was by JUST getting to know him. No fucking.
Especially if you get attached the way you say you do, big no no. Why submit yourself to getting attached to a person who you don't even know!!!
If you're just looking for fun that's fine. But clearly you are not so the golden rule is 3 months girl. I met this guy and we dated for a month, we had sooooooooooooooo much in common, and he would have been the perfect bf but it turned out our morals compasses did not align! I'm not gunna date someone like that so I cut it off and the o my way I figured that out was by JUST getting to know him. No fucking.
Especially if you get attached the way you say you do, big no no. Why submit yourself to getting attached to a person who you don't even know!!!
Well you are 21, very young, so I will give you the benefit of the doubt. But usually if you are going to a man's place, it's an indication that you are ready to bone. Why on earth are you surprised he's not responding to you anymore? You let a stranger come inside of your body without commitment, without him working for it, and proving himself to you.
As yes I agree with the 3 month golden rule too. I kicked it with an Aquarius who for the first month acted like he was so in love. I really wanted to sleep with him too, and I will admit if God had not intervened, I would have! Within month two I started seeing him for who he really was; a dog! A lying, broke, two-timing dog, who had nothing to offer but dialogue. By the third month I was soo happy I did not give him my body because he wasn't worthy of it.
As yes I agree with the 3 month golden rule too. I kicked it with an Aquarius who for the first month acted like he was so in love. I really wanted to sleep with him too, and I will admit if God had not intervened, I would have! Within month two I started seeing him for who he really was; a dog! A lying, broke, two-timing dog, who had nothing to offer but dialogue. By the third month I was soo happy I did not give him my body because he wasn't worthy of it.
Posted by Librawoman77LOL, girl bye. I appreciate your honesty but I don't agree with you. He has told me that he's very sex positive and doesn't believe in judging grown adults for having sex, as you seem to. I do not believe in the concept of a "loose woman." You can wait 90 days or a year to have sex, it could still be the only thing he wanted. So what then?
What do you mean "Of course we had sex." Not all women give it up so fast. Those of us who don't are the ones men respect, pursue and marry. Men don't want to a make an "easy" lay their woman; didn't you know that when you gave it up?
It's cool, but usually when women have sex fast with a guy they have come to terms with the fact that "this is just going to be a good time."
If you want to be serious with a man, make sure he wants the same thing, and don't sleep with him too fast. Obey the 90 days rule. Within 90-days you will see who he really is, and what he really wants. But he sees you as a loose woman who will give it up too easily. HE got what he wanted and baby-girl this is a wrap. He's not pulling a disappearing act, he has disappeared, until the next time he wants to have sex.
Posted by PeanutbutterI'm not expecting a relationship right now, but I am expecting more than a friends with benefits type of situation, so I understand what you're saying. I shouldn't have sex if I know the man isn't committed and that I'll get attached... but I also don't wanna be with someone if the decision to have sex (a choice they ALSO made) makes them feel like I'm not worth it.
I agree w what Librawoman said. You have to make your worth known. If you want a relationship you should have waited to fvck because how are you gunna expect a relationship from someone you don't even know? For all you know you two could be super incompatible.
If you're just looking for fun that's fine. But clearly you are not so the golden rule is 3 months girl. I met this guy and we dated for a month, we had sooooooooooooooo much in common, and he would have been the perfect bf but it turned out our morals compasses did not align! I'm not gunna date someone like that so I cut it off and the o my way I figured that out was by JUST getting to know him. No fucking.
Especially if you get attached the way you say you do, big no no. Why submit yourself to getting attached to a person who you don't even know!!!
Of course a man is gunna say that LOL . Oh lord.
In the end people appreciate & respect what they work for.
Posted by ShrewdsharpAmen sister
Well you are 21, very young, so I will give you the benefit of the doubt. But usually if you are going to a man's place, it's an indication that you are ready to bone. Why on earth are you surprised he's not responding to you anymore? You let a stranger come inside of your body without commitment, without him working for it, and proving himself to you.
As yes I agree with the 3 month golden rule too. I kicked it with an Aquarius who for the first month acted like he was so in love. I really wanted to sleep with him too, and I will admit if God had not intervened, I would have! Within month two I started seeing him for who he really was; a dog! A lying, broke, two-timing dog, who had nothing to offer but dialogue. By the third month I was soo happy I did not give him my body because he wasn't worthy of it.
Posted by tizianiNot really. I don't have much dating experience really, but he was always the first to get in touch so I just kinda went with it.Posted by TeeIndeed, glad to see you've got a head on your shoulders.Posted by Librawoman77LOL, girl bye. I appreciate your honesty but I don't agree with you. He has told me that he's very sex positive and doesn't believe in judging grown adults for having sex, as you seem to. I do not believe in the concept of a "loose woman." You can wait 90 days or a year to have sex, it could still be the only thing he wanted. So what then?
What do you mean "Of course we had sex." Not all women give it up so fast. Those of us who don't are the ones men respect, pursue and marry. Men don't want to a make an "easy" lay their woman; didn't you know that when you gave it up?
It's cool, but usually when women have sex fast with a guy they have come to terms with the fact that "this is just going to be a good time."
If you want to be serious with a man, make sure he wants the same thing, and don't sleep with him too fast. Obey the 90 days rule. Within 90-days you will see who he really is, and what he really wants. But he sees you as a loose woman who will give it up too easily. HE got what he wanted and baby-girl this is a wrap. He's not pulling a disappearing act, he has disappeared, until the next time he wants to have sex.
What is the all texting/ no initiating thing about? Has that approach worked for you in the past?click to expand
Posted by TeeYou're young & should be out having (safe) fun & experiencing life in order to get to know yourself better. ‰ Don't let us damper your spirit lol. You do you, & take our advice w a grain of salt, but remember to always take lessons from your encounters.Posted by PeanutbutterI'm not expecting a relationship right now, but I am expecting more than a friends with benefits type of situation, so I understand what you're saying. I shouldn't have sex if I know the man isn't committed and that I'll get attached... but I also don't wanna be with someone if the decision to have sex (a choice they ALSO made) makes them feel like I'm not worth it.
I agree w what Librawoman said. You have to make your worth known. If you want a relationship you should have waited to fvck because how are you gunna expect a relationship from someone you don't even know? For all you know you two could be super incompatible.
If you're just looking for fun that's fine. But clearly you are not so the golden rule is 3 months girl. I met this guy and we dated for a month, we had sooooooooooooooo much in common, and he would have been the perfect bf but it turned out our morals compasses did not align! I'm not gunna date someone like that so I cut it off and the o my way I figured that out was by JUST getting to know him. No fucking.
Especially if you get attached the way you say you do, big no no. Why submit yourself to getting attached to a person who you don't even know!!!click to expand
Anyway..As for what you want, not quite a relationship but not quite a fvck buddy? You sound confused... Or maybe I am, tell me is there another "in between" option that we are failing to recognize?
And as you grow older you'll hear this more often when it comes to men (and people in general but in this case men) they have DOUBLE STANDARDS. They will tell a woman anything to get their peepees wet. Remember that. It's up to you where you draw the line & how desperate or not you are for the ðŸ†. ‰ I'm sure you're fully aware of this but I'll reiterate in case not but... If you fuck on the first few nights before anything has been talked about you can't have any expectations.
Men love a good conquest so give him a run for his money 😉 either y'all fall in love or ya don't!
Posted by PeanutbutterI don't want a relationship based on all these requirements like waiting however long to have sex. A man who tries repeatedly to have sex early on has no business deeming a woman to be unworthy while he's doing the exact same thing. If he does, he needs to stay far away from me because he's obviously got some issues. And this isn't always true anyway?? There are so many girls who wait to have sex yet still get cheated on, lied to and disrespected.
In the end people appreciate & respect what they work for.
Posted by PeanutbutterNo, I'm not confused. What I want is a relationship, but I want to set the foundation for one first instead of jumping into it, and date and get to know the person. But thank you for the advice, lol. I'm not desperate for the D, I guess I just need to stop putting myself in these situations and learn to say no.Posted by TeeYou're young & should be out having (safe) fun & experiencing life in order to get to know yourself better. ‰ Don't let us damper your spirit lol. You do you, & take our advice w a grain of salt, but remember to always take lessons from your encounters.Posted by PeanutbutterI'm not expecting a relationship right now, but I am expecting more than a friends with benefits type of situation, so I understand what you're saying. I shouldn't have sex if I know the man isn't committed and that I'll get attached... but I also don't wanna be with someone if the decision to have sex (a choice they ALSO made) makes them feel like I'm not worth it.
I agree w what Librawoman said. You have to make your worth known. If you want a relationship you should have waited to fvck because how are you gunna expect a relationship from someone you don't even know? For all you know you two could be super incompatible.
If you're just looking for fun that's fine. But clearly you are not so the golden rule is 3 months girl. I met this guy and we dated for a month, we had sooooooooooooooo much in common, and he would have been the perfect bf but it turned out our morals compasses did not align! I'm not gunna date someone like that so I cut it off and the o my way I figured that out was by JUST getting to know him. No fucking.
Especially if you get attached the way you say you do, big no no. Why submit yourself to getting attached to a person who you don't even know!!!
Anyway..As for what you want, not quite a relationship but not quite a fvck buddy? You sound confused... Or maybe I am, tell me is there another "in between" option that we are failing to recognize?
And as you grow older you'll hear this more often when it comes to men (and people in general but in this case men) they have DOUBLE STANDARDS. They will tell a woman anything to get their peepees wet. Remember that. It's up to you where you draw the line & how desperate or not you are for the ðŸ†. ‰ I'm sure you're fully aware of this but I'll reiterate in case not but... If you fuck on the first few nights before anything has been talked about you can't have any expectations.click to expand
That's actually helpful, tiziani. Thank you for not being all judgy about the situation.
Posted by tizianiOhh okay, I was gonna try to erase some of them but I'm on my phone
The character limit on posts is 3000 here so posts get cut off after a certain amount of quotes.
Posted by TeeSee, you have written a reflective statement in that last part Š. You have answered your own question.Posted by PeanutbutterI don't want a relationship based on all these requirements like waiting however long to have sex. A man who tries repeatedly to have sex early on has no business deeming a woman to be unworthy while he's doing the exact same thing. If he does, he needs to stay far away from me because he's obviously got some issues. And this isn't always true anyway?? There are so many girls who wait to have sex yet still get cheated on, lied to and disrespected.
In the end people appreciate & respect what they work for.
No, I'm not confused. What I want is a relationship, but I want to set the foundation for one first instead of jumping into it, and date and get to know the person. But thank you for the advice, lol. I'm not desperate for the D, I guess I just need to stop putting myself in these situations and learn to say no.click to expand
Read that last paragraph to yourself over and over again, you have standards you just don't know how to go about enforcing them.
Men will go through women like they go through toilet paper, without a second thought and down the toilet it goes.... Unless you give them a motive not to, a challenge, perhaps that means a real soul connection first. Men aren't all that bad, they're quite simple creatures really, it's just that women give them leeway & then get butt hurt about it when things don't pan out the way they had hoped.
Know the way a males mind works and be a few steps ahead ‰
Men will go through women like they go through toilet paper, without a second thought and down the toilet it goes.... Unless you give them a motive not to, a challenge, perhaps that means a real soul connection first. Men aren't all that bad, they're quite simple creatures really, it's just that women give them leeway & then get butt hurt about it when things don't pan out the way they had hoped.
Know the way a males mind works and be a few steps ahead ‰
You don't have to wait however many days, everyone is different.. sometimes when the bond is out of this world (because of commonalities, deep intellectual convos, beliefs aligning, similar upbringing, insert cheesy romantic movie stuff here lol etc) then 90 days will seem impossible, lol. But if you want a relationship I would recommend you build a friendship/soul bond, draw a line, and see how if he respects you as a person and not as a sexual object first.
Just my two cents. Chances are you will ignore our advice & will have to learn these things at your own expense but either way you asked for advice (us reiterating what you already know to be true) so in the end you do you boo ‰
Just my two cents. Chances are you will ignore our advice & will have to learn these things at your own expense but either way you asked for advice (us reiterating what you already know to be true) so in the end you do you boo ‰
So what should I do in the event that he contacts me again or wants to "see me?" Should I try to change things and not have sex the next time, or just forget about him either way?
Posted by AriesLoveI know, but my point is that it happens to all women. And there is no "still" because this just started happening. I'm allowed to be upset. Last time I checked, being a woman who has sex doesn't mean I shouldn't be treated like a human being... and again I don't want to be with a man who doesn't understand that. But this just doesn't seem like him, what he's shown me is a positive and caring person so it is a bit shocking to me.Posted by TeeBut you haven't even made it to a relationship to get dumped, cheated or lied on. You were dropped early on and you are still bent out of shape.Posted by PeanutbutterI don't want a relationship based on all these requirements like waiting however long to have sex. A man who tries repeatedly to have sex early on has no business deeming a woman to be unworthy while he's doing the exact same thing. If he does, he needs to stay far away from me because he's obviously got some issues. And this isn't always true anyway?? There are so many girls who wait to have sex yet still get cheated on, lied to and disrespected.
In the end people appreciate & respect what they work for.
I agree with the other women treat your body, heart and mind like a temple. I wouldn't say 90 days I don't have a number but for me it's a ring, cuz I'm just that bad but for each it's own. I have other priorities in my life so I'm not looking to get laid by a looser. But trust and believe there are a lot of men that would give you that ring.
But you are young so it's either take what you get, deal with it and move on. Or be patient and protect your emotions because he will not be the last that treats you like this.click to expand
Posted by PeanutbutterBut I wasn't necessarily asking for advice with relationships in general, nor was I asking for people to come out and shame me about something that already happened, which is out of my control now ž (not saying you did) I was asking what to do with regards to situation in particular.
You don't have to wait however many days, everyone is different.. sometimes when the bond is out of this world (because of commonalities, deep intellectual convos, beliefs aligning, similar upbringing, insert cheesy romantic movie stuff here lol etc) then 90 days will seem impossible, lol. But if you want a relationship I would recommend you build a friendship/soul bond, draw a line, and see how if he respects you as a person and not as a sexual object first.
Just my two cents. Chances are you will ignore our advice & will have to learn these things at your own expense but either way you asked for advice (us reiterating what you already know to be true) so in the end you do you boo ‰
Posted by tizianiYou're right. I'll never understand men. That's why I'm saying I don't wanna have to follow all these rules in order to keep a guy. I want him to want to be with me because he wants to be with me. Without mind games and weird expectations. If he doesn't then nothing could make him stay, sex or no sex. I'll just have to remember that when I feel like I can't stand to not have him in my life.
Forget the way a man's mind works. You're not a man so you will never truly know, and you seem to be very comfortable with that, trying to figure out how a man thinks will only take time out of your life from focusing on what you want.
don't let these people talk down to you like you're some kind of helpless victim.
You got into this situation and you know what you want out of it. Either he will turn out to just a shy and inconsistent but genuine in his bullshit, or he will turn out to be a malicious bullshitter. Either way, when you're getting to know someone in romance, you are going to have to get to know their bullshit at first too. Just hope it's the first kind, not the second.
And if you learnt that you need to learn to say no or not go over to someone's place then either way you took something out of the experience.
Forget these people who want to subliminally talk down to you like you're trash. You made your decisions, be proud of the ones you enjoyed and let the other ones go. Believe it or not, there are genuinely laid back guys out there around your age that can handle your approach, but sex does always inevitably change things... sometimes for good, sometimes for worse. Timing has nothing to do with it, as you well know.
🙄 nobody is talking down to anyone. We are genuinely trying to help her find a solution otherwise we wouldn't be here.
The fact that you're talking shit about others opinions like that shows a lot about you. We have all lived through similar experiences as women and we can only speak from our experiences so for you to say that your advice is better is the only bullshit I see in this thread.
You made valid points. Some I agree with and others I do not, like I said our input should be take. With a grain of salt because none of are living what the OP is, not even you Tiz ‰
The fact that you're talking shit about others opinions like that shows a lot about you. We have all lived through similar experiences as women and we can only speak from our experiences so for you to say that your advice is better is the only bullshit I see in this thread.
You made valid points. Some I agree with and others I do not, like I said our input should be take. With a grain of salt because none of are living what the OP is, not even you Tiz ‰
You're not being shamed, all I'm saying is know what you want. You first said u don't quite want a relationship but not quite a fwb, and then you proceeded to state that you do which tells us you are probably confused and sending this guy mixed signals.
No shame in that we were aaaaaaall 21 at one point, just know what you want and don't be ashamed to ask for your demands to be met first.
No shame in that we were aaaaaaall 21 at one point, just know what you want and don't be ashamed to ask for your demands to be met first.
Proceeded to state that you do want a relationship lol
And if you don't find my advice helpful at least you are reflecting and taking what you want from it.
I'm just stating patterns I have seen in men hun. If you want to continue sleeping w men before setting any ground rules knowing you'll get attached and knowing you want a relationship then you go ahead and do that. You are your own person
I'm just stating patterns I have seen in men hun. If you want to continue sleeping w men before setting any ground rules knowing you'll get attached and knowing you want a relationship then you go ahead and do that. You are your own person
And yes, I've had a few friends turn one night stands into long term relationships, I've seen all sides to things. So you never know what the outcome will be
Honestly I would just let him come to you, do your own thing and keep your life moving. You guys barely met and aren't that invested. If he doesn't then you have your response right there.
When you first meet someone it should be all lovey dovey Honeymoony stage IF the feelings are mutual. Just FYI
Posted by ShrewdsharpYour post really spoke to me. I recently experienced something similar and so this resonates with me. OP I hope you take Shrewdsharp's words at heart.
Well you are 21, very young, so I will give you the benefit of the doubt. But usually if you are going to a man's place, it's an indication that you are ready to bone. Why on earth are you surprised he's not responding to you anymore? You let a stranger come inside of your body without commitment, without him working for it, and proving himself to you.
As yes I agree with the 3 month golden rule too. I kicked it with an Aquarius who for the first month acted like he was so in love. I really wanted to sleep with him too, and I will admit if God had not intervened, I would have! Within month two I started seeing him for who he really was; a dog! A lying, broke, two-timing dog, who had nothing to offer but dialogue. By the third month I was soo happy I did not give him my body because he wasn't worthy of it.
I am sure this guy is feeling a bit embarrassed about his performance but you are not doing yourself any favors by sacrificing your desires for someone else's in hope that by luck, you'll still end up with the results you want. In otherwords, why go along with a casual, sexual situationship with some guy...giving him what he wants, voiding yourself of what you want...in hopes that luck will find you and turn it all magically into love??
Dont let some of the harsh words get to you, you are indeed young and most of us wont admit it but have been where you are or are where you are now and that is making sacrifices for the hope that our sacrifice will make someone want us.
Dont short change yourself. If you want a relationship, go find it with a guy who wants that too, dont give yourself to a guy who just wants your body and is fine disregarding it later.
Posted by tizianiLOL Tiz , full of wisdom tonight....Posted by TeeForget basing your actions on his, that will only confuse you.
So what should I do in the event that he contacts me again or wants to "see me?" Should I try to change things and not have sex the next time, or just forget about him either way?
Play it the way you want to play it, and use your instincts.
You just said you don't want to put yourself in those kind of situations anymore, so that's a start. Because it came from you.
Don't get poisoned by these jaded people on here. Get out this place while you still can.click to expand
😛
Posted by AriesLoveinside joke between him and IPosted by justagirl"Play it the way you want to and use your instincts"Posted by tizianiLOL Tiz , full of wisdom tonight....Posted by TeeForget basing your actions on his, that will only confuse you.
So what should I do in the event that he contacts me again or wants to "see me?" Should I try to change things and not have sex the next time, or just forget about him either way?
Play it the way you want to play it, and use your instincts.
You just said you don't want to put yourself in those kind of situations anymore, so that's a start. Because it came from you.
Don't get poisoned by these jaded people on here. Get out this place while you still can.
😛
Ummm she doesn't know what to do that's why she is asking 2 questions.
"Don't get poisoned by the jaded people on here"
People who are telling her to respect herself, let him go, move on find someone who will treat her better.
BTW wisdom is knowledge and experience, instinct is compulsive behavior.click to expand
*keep the dream alive*
I'mma let you get back to disecting what he said thou.....
Cheers
🍹
Psssst don't take DXP soo serious!
Thank you all for the words of wisdom. I appreciate it. â¤
One, ignore the male in this thread who goes under the guise of being oh so "wise." He's not. He really, really isn't. End of story.
Two, look at the red flags, dear. If a guy is bringing up sex talk with you that early on, guess what he wants? I don't care how many frilly words he tacks on to your convos. REAL men don't do that shit with women they respect. Little boys who are looking to get their dicks wet do this garbage.
You proceeded to go over to his place after all this talk and omgz, he banged and ditched you. *GASP* Why are we surprised?
Three, blah blah "saving yourself/respecting yourself" whatever archaic bullshit some of the women here are chucking at you, whatever. Should you have caved in so soon if you wanted this opportunistic loser to stick around? Probably not. But then again, why would you fret over some asshole who clearly only saw you for hit it and quit it material?
HOWEVER, some real truth your silly 21 year old head needs to realize- guys will say and do whatever they can to stick their dick in you without consequence. You giving in and crying about it later is just ridiculous. No, not all men are like this, but SO many are, especially in your age group. If you don't want some dude ditching you after sticking his dick in you, don't put out. But if you do, just brace yourself for the probable outcome of him running off afterwards. ESPECIALLY if he's bringing up sexual talk a little on the fast side. I know it makes your silly 21 year old brain quiver in delight that some dude wants to fuck you. After all, most girls are exploring sexuality and the like and it's oh so exciting some dude wants you.
But this thing you come here with, all baffled and shit- knock it off. It's plain as day what happened here to those of us who have experienced this same bullshit.
If you don't want this to happen again to you, do not put out with a dude who's talking to you so crudely so early on. There's a very high probability that he'll become "too busy" (another lovely red flag that he's avoiding you/full of shit). Other than that, if you decide to hop on some crude asshole's dick because "of course" it happens, then proceed to consider it a one night stand.
Explore and put out to your heart's content, just like the only male in this thread is suggesting (bros before hoes, yo), but you better start learning real fast how things REALLY go in the dating scene if you don't want to continue to get burned.
This is far from "jaded" and more "real talk" going on here. Something many cave dwellers here on DXP LOVE to avoid.
Take home message- start learning to read behavior better, pay attention to obvious red flags, and use better judgement. And remember, there are many a double standard in dating- including women and sex. It may be 2016, but guys generally still have a pretty shitty stance on women who give them what they want early on and see that as a green light to treat them like shit.
Two, look at the red flags, dear. If a guy is bringing up sex talk with you that early on, guess what he wants? I don't care how many frilly words he tacks on to your convos. REAL men don't do that shit with women they respect. Little boys who are looking to get their dicks wet do this garbage.
You proceeded to go over to his place after all this talk and omgz, he banged and ditched you. *GASP* Why are we surprised?
Three, blah blah "saving yourself/respecting yourself" whatever archaic bullshit some of the women here are chucking at you, whatever. Should you have caved in so soon if you wanted this opportunistic loser to stick around? Probably not. But then again, why would you fret over some asshole who clearly only saw you for hit it and quit it material?
HOWEVER, some real truth your silly 21 year old head needs to realize- guys will say and do whatever they can to stick their dick in you without consequence. You giving in and crying about it later is just ridiculous. No, not all men are like this, but SO many are, especially in your age group. If you don't want some dude ditching you after sticking his dick in you, don't put out. But if you do, just brace yourself for the probable outcome of him running off afterwards. ESPECIALLY if he's bringing up sexual talk a little on the fast side. I know it makes your silly 21 year old brain quiver in delight that some dude wants to fuck you. After all, most girls are exploring sexuality and the like and it's oh so exciting some dude wants you.
But this thing you come here with, all baffled and shit- knock it off. It's plain as day what happened here to those of us who have experienced this same bullshit.
If you don't want this to happen again to you, do not put out with a dude who's talking to you so crudely so early on. There's a very high probability that he'll become "too busy" (another lovely red flag that he's avoiding you/full of shit). Other than that, if you decide to hop on some crude asshole's dick because "of course" it happens, then proceed to consider it a one night stand.
Explore and put out to your heart's content, just like the only male in this thread is suggesting (bros before hoes, yo), but you better start learning real fast how things REALLY go in the dating scene if you don't want to continue to get burned.
This is far from "jaded" and more "real talk" going on here. Something many cave dwellers here on DXP LOVE to avoid.
Take home message- start learning to read behavior better, pay attention to obvious red flags, and use better judgement. And remember, there are many a double standard in dating- including women and sex. It may be 2016, but guys generally still have a pretty shitty stance on women who give them what they want early on and see that as a green light to treat them like shit.
Posted by AriesLoveHe wants women to do what he wants in a woman he'd pursue- which isn't much. It disturbs me some of the skewed shit he tells women around here.
But I forgot @tiziani wants people to chase and be aggressive and see where it leads all while loosing yourself at the same time.
It makes me lol when silly bitches go on about how "wise" he is. If you pay attention to his posts, he really isn't saying much of anything, tbh, nor is his "advice" in the woman's best interest. It's all very vague. All he's done around here is charm the shit out of the vagina crowd, in typical Libra fashion, like a pied piper.
Posted by TeeLibras can be master manipulators; despite his so-called acceptance of your sexually liberated views, after you "grown people" had sex within a week, he is mysteriously backing-off.Posted by Librawoman77LOL, girl bye. I appreciate your honesty but I don't agree with you. He has told me that he's very sex positive and doesn't believe in judging grown adults for having sex, as you seem to. I do not believe in the concept of a "loose woman." You can wait 90 days or a year to have sex, it could still be the only thing he wanted. So what then?
What do you mean "Of course we had sex." Not all women give it up so fast. Those of us who don't are the ones men respect, pursue and marry. Men don't want to a make an "easy" lay their woman; didn't you know that when you gave it up?
It's cool, but usually when women have sex fast with a guy they have come to terms with the fact that "this is just going to be a good time."
If you want to be serious with a man, make sure he wants the same thing, and don't sleep with him too fast. Obey the 90 days rule. Within 90-days you will see who he really is, and what he really wants. But he sees you as a loose woman who will give it up too easily. HE got what he wanted and baby-girl this is a wrap. He's not pulling a disappearing act, he has disappeared, until the next time he wants to have sex.click to expand
Men's major hormone testosterone forces them to pursue, hunt go get, conquer, compete, sweat, provide, battle and win. Women's main hormone estrogen, doesn't provoke us to conquer, to battle to hunt. Men are hunters, they are bred, socialized and love to compete, chase, go get, and conquer the prize with sweat, blood and toil. Men need sex! The harder and longer they have to work for the thing they want, the more likely they are to value it. The easier the conquest the less likely the testosterone will kick it to fuel the man's desire for the object of their affection. It's not games, it's really physiological.
Many men want the prize. They want the woman, other men could not easily get. It makes them feel proud, it strokes their ego, it makes them think of you in a highly respectable manner.
You have a right to decide how much of a challenge you are willing to be for a man. It sounds like you want to be a sexually liberated woman who does not abide by traditional rules, in this culture there is a name for women like that. And men will start classifying you as such. You can't help who or what you are. However if you want a good long-term relationship it's important to understand men physiologically and allow them the wonderful opportunity of wining and over a good period of time to woo the prize....you!. But of course, it's totally up to you.
Many men want the prize. They want the woman, other men could not easily get. It makes them feel proud, it strokes their ego, it makes them think of you in a highly respectable manner.
You have a right to decide how much of a challenge you are willing to be for a man. It sounds like you want to be a sexually liberated woman who does not abide by traditional rules, in this culture there is a name for women like that. And men will start classifying you as such. You can't help who or what you are. However if you want a good long-term relationship it's important to understand men physiologically and allow them the wonderful opportunity of wining and over a good period of time to woo the prize....you!. But of course, it's totally up to you.
Posted by TeeExactly. A guy can just as easily fuck you over if you have sex with him on the first date or if you wait till the 20th.Posted by PeanutbutterI don't want a relationship based on all these requirements like waiting however long to have sex. A man who tries repeatedly to have sex early on has no business deeming a woman to be unworthy while he's doing the exact same thing. If he does, he needs to stay far away from me because he's obviously got some issues. And this isn't always true anyway?? There are so many girls who wait to have sex yet still get cheated on, lied to and disrespected.
In the end people appreciate & respect what they work for.click to expand
Waiting a certain amount of days to have sex isn't gonna make a cheater loyal, a liar honest.
It's important to qualify the dude for youself. If after one date your feeling the connection, your liking where he's coming from and know what he's about...than have at it.
Posted by rockyroadicecream
One, ignore the male in this thread who goes under the guise of being oh so "wise." He's not. He really, really isn't. End of story.
Two, look at the red flags, dear. If a guy is bringing up sex talk with you that early on, guess what he wants? I don't care how many frilly words he tacks on to your convos. REAL men don't do that shit with women they respect. Little boys who are looking to get their dicks wet do this garbage.
You proceeded to go over to his place after all this talk and omgz, he banged and ditched you. *GASP* Why are we surprised?
Three, blah blah "saving yourself/respecting yourself" whatever archaic bullshit some of the women here are chucking at you, whatever. Should you have caved in so soon if you wanted this opportunistic loser to stick around? Probably not. But then again, why would you fret over some asshole who clearly only saw you for hit it and quit it material?
HOWEVER, some real truth your silly 21 year old head needs to realize- guys will say and do whatever they can to stick their dick in you without consequence. You giving in and crying about it later is just ridiculous. No, not all men are like this, but SO many are, especially in your age group. If you don't want some dude ditching you after sticking his dick in you, don't put out. But if you do, just brace yourself for the probable outcome of him running off afterwards. ESPECIALLY if he's bringing up sexual talk a little on the fast side. I know it makes your silly 21 year old brain quiver in delight that some dude wants to fuck you. After all, most girls are exploring sexuality and the like and it's oh so exciting some dude wants you.
But this thing you come here with, all baffled and shit- knock it off. It's plain as day what happened here to those of us who have experienced this same bullshit.
If you don't want this to happen again to you, do not put out with a dude who's talking to you so crudely so early on. There's a very high probability that he'll become "too busy" (another lovely red flag that he's avoiding you/full of shit). Other than that, if you decide to hop on some crude asshole's dick because "of course" it happens, then proceed to consider it a one night stand.
Explore and put out to your heart's content, just like the only male in this thread is suggesting (bros before hoes, yo), but you better start learning real fast how things REALLY go in the dating scene if you don't want to continue to get burned.
This is far from "jaded" and more "real talk" going on here. Something many cave dwellers here on DXP LOVE to avoid.
Take home message- start learning to read behavior better, pay attention to obvious red flags, and use better judgement. And remember, there are many a double standard in dating- including women and sex. It may
^ all of that is on point
Actions speak louder than words OP.
If he is avoiding you and ignoring you.... Girl...... You need to stop giving his ass so much credit and move on to the next.
If he is avoiding you and ignoring you.... Girl...... You need to stop giving his ass so much credit and move on to the next.
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