AliKat
@AliKat
13 Years
Comments: 0 · Posts: 16 · Topics: 1
I'm Libra woman, met a Libra man and I'm confused
or are we both just being libra's??
You sound a bit full of yourself. :/
i'm 48 and i really object to the whole 'cougar' thing and so to hear a woman saying it like she's proud to wear that title as a badge is quite revolting to be honest.
it's no accolade to be able to attract younger men. they just know they're on to a sure thing if they show the slightest interest in an older woman. seriously THAT is what they are thinking. i've dated much younger men but i prefer to stick within my own age group cos i don't need a man to validate me in any way shape or form.
nothing against age gap relationships cos they sometimes work out great but you're talking about the predatorial approach to snaring younger guys and quite honestly, if you are that flattered by their interest you must have zero self confidence.
and yeah....you sound full of yourself but i suspect the embellishment is probably exaggerated (definitely unnecessary) and that you're actually very insecure.
it's no accolade to be able to attract younger men. they just know they're on to a sure thing if they show the slightest interest in an older woman. seriously THAT is what they are thinking. i've dated much younger men but i prefer to stick within my own age group cos i don't need a man to validate me in any way shape or form.
nothing against age gap relationships cos they sometimes work out great but you're talking about the predatorial approach to snaring younger guys and quite honestly, if you are that flattered by their interest you must have zero self confidence.
and yeah....you sound full of yourself but i suspect the embellishment is probably exaggerated (definitely unnecessary) and that you're actually very insecure.
Wow you got beat down pretty good here right off the bat ! .
IMO there is nothing wrong with feeling and admitting you have sexual confidence and naturally attract men , even if they are younger. Since you are both going thru divorces you would expect things to go real slow ..plus you are both Libras weighing things out. I would be concerned that there is not enough initial 'spark' between you two .You said you dated 20 yrs. ago and nothing really came of it . I wouldn't be worried about a few years in age difference , just be sure he is equally attracted to you now that you have a new view twoards him...or you will both be bored ! He may not be firey enough for you in the long run ..good luck !
IMO there is nothing wrong with feeling and admitting you have sexual confidence and naturally attract men , even if they are younger. Since you are both going thru divorces you would expect things to go real slow ..plus you are both Libras weighing things out. I would be concerned that there is not enough initial 'spark' between you two .You said you dated 20 yrs. ago and nothing really came of it . I wouldn't be worried about a few years in age difference , just be sure he is equally attracted to you now that you have a new view twoards him...or you will both be bored ! He may not be firey enough for you in the long run ..good luck !
Thank you Libragemmale for the sincere response. it does appear I got a right proper butt whooping straight out of the gate. no worries for me though, I have a firm grip on my big girl panties and can handle far more mud slinging than what these folks have slung at me. usually it is well deserved as when i am conflicted my thoughts race and it is hard for my fingers to keep up, and what sounds good in my head, sometimes doesn't reflect the same in my writing. based on what i wrote, i don't blame anyone for the "perception" they garnered from my half ass'ed writing. pretty sad considering i'm a writer.
as for the other comments....
Not that it matters much as to the WHY I am attracted to younger men, but because I obviously wrote it in a way that makes me look like some pedophile...let me explain better as I can see where it does seem that way. first let me say that i was molested as a child and raped as a teen by a man who was roughly 50. so older men have always been a little more than a turn off. so now that i find myself single in that age group it is a bit difficult to find men that are not only attractive to me, but attracted to me as well. but generally speaking, "younger" to me is mostly just a few years, and the 29 yo is the one who helped me leave an abusive marriage and we are best friends. I also do not HUNT these men, they hunt me....usually unsuccessfully. and it was not my intention of the "cougar on the hunt" comment, I meant by that as predatory toward the men i am attracted to, not just the little ones.....but.....that is only once in a while, not my everyday behavior...and not the reason for the men coming on to me all the time. basically what i am saying is that i am not "asking" for it. it just "is"
i was really just trying to explain, unsuccessfully, what i'm used to based on how it has been for me since becoming single....which is that for some reason....men just paw all over me. they see me purely sexually, and skip the fact that i am a human being. as I stated, i don't know why. it is the men, particularly younger, hitting on me, that i am calling the cougar "effect". But it is far from anything "predatorial" on my side.
....more to come, ran of "room"
as for the other comments....
Not that it matters much as to the WHY I am attracted to younger men, but because I obviously wrote it in a way that makes me look like some pedophile...let me explain better as I can see where it does seem that way. first let me say that i was molested as a child and raped as a teen by a man who was roughly 50. so older men have always been a little more than a turn off. so now that i find myself single in that age group it is a bit difficult to find men that are not only attractive to me, but attracted to me as well. but generally speaking, "younger" to me is mostly just a few years, and the 29 yo is the one who helped me leave an abusive marriage and we are best friends. I also do not HUNT these men, they hunt me....usually unsuccessfully. and it was not my intention of the "cougar on the hunt" comment, I meant by that as predatory toward the men i am attracted to, not just the little ones.....but.....that is only once in a while, not my everyday behavior...and not the reason for the men coming on to me all the time. basically what i am saying is that i am not "asking" for it. it just "is"
i was really just trying to explain, unsuccessfully, what i'm used to based on how it has been for me since becoming single....which is that for some reason....men just paw all over me. they see me purely sexually, and skip the fact that i am a human being. as I stated, i don't know why. it is the men, particularly younger, hitting on me, that i am calling the cougar "effect". But it is far from anything "predatorial" on my side.
....more to come, ran of "room"
So I am hoping that I have shed the light on the fact that I am far from full of myself as i really don't get it. I'm really nothing special to look at. just a normal average woman. And yes, my self-esteem has in fact taken 20 years of abuse, but I am quite careful to NOT be using men for validation in any way. doesn't mean it doesn't creep up on me from time to time, I'm human of course, but when i notice it, I put myself in check, or call a friend so she can put me in check.
So back to my original query, this libra male. 3 months ago we ran into each other at an event. I didn't know it I was him till the end of it. Talking to mutual friends about my situation, I mentioned that he was an older man I could see myself attracted to. Our friends got giddy and have been trying to play match maker behind the scenes ever since. I left the event not even thinking about him that way. Then we were at another event a month ago, and we ended up talking for hours. We both mentioned not being —ready??. Then a couple weeks later at the next event is when my friend told me he has been asking about me and was afraid to ask me out for fear of rejection. Based on what happened last time, I don't blame him. I told her to tell him to go for it. But when he heard I was interested he retorted —im not ready??. But then asked them for my # a few days later, but didn't call me. Then the friends had a party last weekend and invited us both. This is where things got stupid. He had been flying under my radar until this night, and when I saw him when he walked in??_.he all of a sudden had a new appeal to me, and even though we are both extroverts and chatted up everyone else at the party, we could barely look each other in the eye. We talked and joked a bit, but to each other we both seemed self-conscious and insecure.
This is where I would normally be bored and move on, but for some reason I can't stop thinking about him. Day, night, first thing in the morning etc. I am just as baffled by my own behavior as I am his. But no matter how hard I try to stop thinking about him, I can't. It's usually not that hard to tell if a guy is into me, but he is like trying to know what a book about when the cover has no words or pictures. There is something behind the cover, I just don't know what it is. So I freaked out, also not like me. I just wanted to know why he is bothering with me if he isn't interested. Then out of the blue, the day befor
So back to my original query, this libra male. 3 months ago we ran into each other at an event. I didn't know it I was him till the end of it. Talking to mutual friends about my situation, I mentioned that he was an older man I could see myself attracted to. Our friends got giddy and have been trying to play match maker behind the scenes ever since. I left the event not even thinking about him that way. Then we were at another event a month ago, and we ended up talking for hours. We both mentioned not being —ready??. Then a couple weeks later at the next event is when my friend told me he has been asking about me and was afraid to ask me out for fear of rejection. Based on what happened last time, I don't blame him. I told her to tell him to go for it. But when he heard I was interested he retorted —im not ready??. But then asked them for my # a few days later, but didn't call me. Then the friends had a party last weekend and invited us both. This is where things got stupid. He had been flying under my radar until this night, and when I saw him when he walked in??_.he all of a sudden had a new appeal to me, and even though we are both extroverts and chatted up everyone else at the party, we could barely look each other in the eye. We talked and joked a bit, but to each other we both seemed self-conscious and insecure.
This is where I would normally be bored and move on, but for some reason I can't stop thinking about him. Day, night, first thing in the morning etc. I am just as baffled by my own behavior as I am his. But no matter how hard I try to stop thinking about him, I can't. It's usually not that hard to tell if a guy is into me, but he is like trying to know what a book about when the cover has no words or pictures. There is something behind the cover, I just don't know what it is. So I freaked out, also not like me. I just wanted to know why he is bothering with me if he isn't interested. Then out of the blue, the day befor
....thanksgiving he texted me. That went on for a couple hours, but basically harmless banter. Again the day after, more texting from him. This time he was teasing and joking with me. I wanted to ride my horse with our friends on sat, but they were busy and suggested I just ask him to go. I did, he said yes, we rode and had a nice time, went to dinner after, all going well??_.my best friend showed up at the place and said she could tell I was completely smitten with him. But said she could read him??_she??d never met him before. He takes me and my horse home, talk talk talk??_.hug, more talk??_.then the peck on the lips with the final hug. Then yesterday the texting got a little more flirty, but I am trying to contain myself, not be the aggressor, not be the vixen, not use my sexuality to lure him in. but then, I want to make sure he knows I do in fact think of him as more than just friends and it is OK to make a move.....
Usually, when there is mutual attraction, if the move is not made on me, I am not afraid to make it myself. But I do everything humanly possible to not be the aggressor. Sometimes I just can't help myself. But I prefer a confident man.
So, do I think he likes me? Yes I do. How much? I don't know, I'm baffled. Like I said, we are both going through lengthy divorces??_.but you can't help when, how or where you meet someone??_.right? It's just going so slow it makes me unsure. I??ve been having fun, looking for nothing serious, but I can see the potential for a whole lot more with this guy. I know we are both scared to death of that. And I was just wondering if the male libra psyche is like this, taking the slower approach. I know when it comes to choices that the outcome really matters to me??_..making a decision is a complete nightmare for me. For god sakes, it took me 3ys to decide to leave my husband, many years longer if you count all the thinking I did to come up with the conclusion that I needed to make a decision.
so that is where i am at....a libra baffled by a libra....getting a taste of my own medicine i guess.
thanks for the warm welcome
Usually, when there is mutual attraction, if the move is not made on me, I am not afraid to make it myself. But I do everything humanly possible to not be the aggressor. Sometimes I just can't help myself. But I prefer a confident man.
So, do I think he likes me? Yes I do. How much? I don't know, I'm baffled. Like I said, we are both going through lengthy divorces??_.but you can't help when, how or where you meet someone??_.right? It's just going so slow it makes me unsure. I??ve been having fun, looking for nothing serious, but I can see the potential for a whole lot more with this guy. I know we are both scared to death of that. And I was just wondering if the male libra psyche is like this, taking the slower approach. I know when it comes to choices that the outcome really matters to me??_..making a decision is a complete nightmare for me. For god sakes, it took me 3ys to decide to leave my husband, many years longer if you count all the thinking I did to come up with the conclusion that I needed to make a decision.
so that is where i am at....a libra baffled by a libra....getting a taste of my own medicine i guess.
thanks for the warm welcome
Ali do yourself a favor and just ignore those here that can't give you constructive critisism /analysis .Sometimes people write things in here that can sound kind of curt even if they don't mean to. It's all good. As for you're sexually ,you sound like you are Venus conjunct Mars. Would like to see your natal chart for kicks ,it tells alot about someone.Good luck with the Libra , at least you know that you will both think alike and that speaks volumes.
LoL I just read you're latest posts. you ARE smitten if you can't stop thinking about him !! Yes you need him to be a little more assured and confident with you. Don't tone down the Vixen act too much with him or he will think there is no spark .Give him a 'wink', we LOVE that sheet ! eye contact is everything with Libras , (you know that !) Too bad you are both dealing with divorces , that could really slow things down to a halt until both divorces are final and in the rear-view mirror.
thanks LGM, no worries, my knickers aren't wedged anywhere i can't pick them out of....my dob is 9-30-69 8:05 am. i looked it up on one of the online natal calculators a few months ago and can't remember what it said, or quite frankly what it means. all the moon, rising, etc stuff is a new concept to me. but i have always known i was a bit more "libra" than the average libra. hell, i drive my own self insane some times. i'm a talker....never shut up...and it is usually when i try to condense my thoughts for others, that i don't explain myself well and get a foot caught in my mouth. though the lengthy discussion is hard for most others to handle, they usually don't misunderstand me when i'm thorough.
now this sexuallity- venus mars thing. i am HIGHLY sexual, but EASILY turned off. it takes alot to get in my pants usually, but then some men.,..seems like they don't have to say a word, if the chemistry is there, I pounce like a hungry lion. but most men, blow it so easily. i dont have a "type" per se, as far as looks go, it is more personality. if they are witty, sarcastic and smart and good talkers.....even a dog can charm me right into bed in no time flat. and on the flip side, i can't tell you how many very, VERY sexy HOT men i have turned down because they are conversationally retarded. my friends make fun of me all the time that i should hang out at the prison or pound...as they can't believe the men i turn away....and the ones i chase. i'm an oddball for sure.
and then this guy. he is NOTHING like any of my normal "fun times", nothing like a guy i would normally be atracted to. and i'm scared that it is some psychological wierdness from my past. i have yet to honestly be pursued by a normal guy....i honestly have been having alot of fun.
now this sexuallity- venus mars thing. i am HIGHLY sexual, but EASILY turned off. it takes alot to get in my pants usually, but then some men.,..seems like they don't have to say a word, if the chemistry is there, I pounce like a hungry lion. but most men, blow it so easily. i dont have a "type" per se, as far as looks go, it is more personality. if they are witty, sarcastic and smart and good talkers.....even a dog can charm me right into bed in no time flat. and on the flip side, i can't tell you how many very, VERY sexy HOT men i have turned down because they are conversationally retarded. my friends make fun of me all the time that i should hang out at the prison or pound...as they can't believe the men i turn away....and the ones i chase. i'm an oddball for sure.
and then this guy. he is NOTHING like any of my normal "fun times", nothing like a guy i would normally be atracted to. and i'm scared that it is some psychological wierdness from my past. i have yet to honestly be pursued by a normal guy....i honestly have been having alot of fun.
ok LGM, just read your second post,....LOL....YES....I am over the top smitten with him. i dont' even know how the hell it happened! feels like i got run over by a bus that i didn't see coming while i was too busy watching the fancy cars on the race track. you are sooooo right about eye contact....thank you for the reminder. no bragging, just what i have been told....i have a bewitching blue eyed gaze and it is by far my deadliest lure. most people have a hard time with eye contact...not me. and i use it to my advantage for both good and evil....LOL...
i think that is what thru me off at the party....i couldn't even look at him...i got all tongue tied and self consious, and i know he did too because we were fools with everyone else. i am the quintessential social butterfly...and it usually takes someone very interesting to make me sit still and pay attention, and even then my mind wanders to other goings on in the room. i can effectively pay attention to about 4 conversations at once, but only participate in two simultaneously.
ok, eye contact....hard with him because i didn't want to put presure on him at first, then i got all gushy.....but i think i did ok sat....but will remember to ramp it up next time.
we, er um, I...did get a bit naughty yesterday...not to bad, but enough to let him him know he can go there. i know he got speachless at one point because he told me so. i thought....oh crud...this guy doesn't even know the half of what i am capable of here. what i am holding back. (i write erotic stories btw...but he doesn't know that, nor that i write about sex and the human experience)... and i am holding back a lot. but thanks for the green light to let him know....it's ok. cuz honestly....i really want a conan. i want a sexual equal, both in and out of the bedroom. i want a man. and he is a man in his everyday life. he also is thoughtful. he just picked up my saddle out of his truck and walked up my dirveway....then asked where to put it.....instead of the usual...."do you want help with this?" he just did it. i liked that.
GOD i got it bad. lmao...I'm toast
i think that is what thru me off at the party....i couldn't even look at him...i got all tongue tied and self consious, and i know he did too because we were fools with everyone else. i am the quintessential social butterfly...and it usually takes someone very interesting to make me sit still and pay attention, and even then my mind wanders to other goings on in the room. i can effectively pay attention to about 4 conversations at once, but only participate in two simultaneously.
ok, eye contact....hard with him because i didn't want to put presure on him at first, then i got all gushy.....but i think i did ok sat....but will remember to ramp it up next time.
we, er um, I...did get a bit naughty yesterday...not to bad, but enough to let him him know he can go there. i know he got speachless at one point because he told me so. i thought....oh crud...this guy doesn't even know the half of what i am capable of here. what i am holding back. (i write erotic stories btw...but he doesn't know that, nor that i write about sex and the human experience)... and i am holding back a lot. but thanks for the green light to let him know....it's ok. cuz honestly....i really want a conan. i want a sexual equal, both in and out of the bedroom. i want a man. and he is a man in his everyday life. he also is thoughtful. he just picked up my saddle out of his truck and walked up my dirveway....then asked where to put it.....instead of the usual...."do you want help with this?" he just did it. i liked that.
GOD i got it bad. lmao...I'm toast
LOL you're crazy as hell ! check PM
Oh, i'm a nut job, that's for certain. LMAO....
According to the chart I just looked at, I have??_??_.In Libra: Rising, sun, mercury, Jupiter, and Uranus. Moon is Gemini. (makes total sense) Venus and Pluto in Virgo. My mars is in Capricorn. Saturn in Taurus and Neptune in Scorpio. N node in Pisces. Now, I have no idea how —accurate?? the online natal charts are, but the entire report was dead on balls accurate as to a description of me. Closest I??ve ever read.
This could not be more accurate if the writer followed me around 24/7??_LMAO....
""Moon is in 05 Degrees Gemini.
Restless in the extreme, you are easily bored because of your short attention span. Your emotions change rapidly and you love to talk about your feelings. Generally, you have good judgment -- your intellect controls your emotions and you do not overreact emotionally to things.( though I think all the libra things get to me and I do react emotionally to things, but then the libra logic kicks in and I go all Vulcan on my emotions) A good jack-of-all-trades, you have many- sided interests and enjoy reasoning things through. With your mental agility and need for physical mobility, you are attracted to traveling and learning about other peoples and cultures. You have vivid powers of emotional self-expression - - you can be a nonstop talker. You love to share your ideas with anyone who will listen. ""
I don't know much about the rising, sun etc stuff. But is it normal to have so many things in your —main?? sign??_ie??_so many things in Libra? Is that why I am more —libra?? than the many libra??s I know? I work in social services, in my little office, there are 7 of us. You should see the hilarity at lunch time trying to decide what to eat. Some days, starving is almost an eventuality. Even Saturday, when he and I went for food??_.neither of us wanted to choose, he won, I had to choose. I live in a small town, only 5 choices. Omg this is sooo libra of us, he said??_??which are you the least sick of eating— and of course I got a blank face??_.you??d think he??d have asked me if I wanted to sell my kid. I picked the newest, closest place, before we ran out of gas driving around. LOL
It's no shock to me that I work in social services, and am a teacher, and my day job involves talking and helping people....all day! and that my hobbies include....teaching and talking and helping people. i also am very into inter species communication...and teach tha
According to the chart I just looked at, I have??_??_.In Libra: Rising, sun, mercury, Jupiter, and Uranus. Moon is Gemini. (makes total sense) Venus and Pluto in Virgo. My mars is in Capricorn. Saturn in Taurus and Neptune in Scorpio. N node in Pisces. Now, I have no idea how —accurate?? the online natal charts are, but the entire report was dead on balls accurate as to a description of me. Closest I??ve ever read.
This could not be more accurate if the writer followed me around 24/7??_LMAO....
""Moon is in 05 Degrees Gemini.
Restless in the extreme, you are easily bored because of your short attention span. Your emotions change rapidly and you love to talk about your feelings. Generally, you have good judgment -- your intellect controls your emotions and you do not overreact emotionally to things.( though I think all the libra things get to me and I do react emotionally to things, but then the libra logic kicks in and I go all Vulcan on my emotions) A good jack-of-all-trades, you have many- sided interests and enjoy reasoning things through. With your mental agility and need for physical mobility, you are attracted to traveling and learning about other peoples and cultures. You have vivid powers of emotional self-expression - - you can be a nonstop talker. You love to share your ideas with anyone who will listen. ""
I don't know much about the rising, sun etc stuff. But is it normal to have so many things in your —main?? sign??_ie??_so many things in Libra? Is that why I am more —libra?? than the many libra??s I know? I work in social services, in my little office, there are 7 of us. You should see the hilarity at lunch time trying to decide what to eat. Some days, starving is almost an eventuality. Even Saturday, when he and I went for food??_.neither of us wanted to choose, he won, I had to choose. I live in a small town, only 5 choices. Omg this is sooo libra of us, he said??_??which are you the least sick of eating— and of course I got a blank face??_.you??d think he??d have asked me if I wanted to sell my kid. I picked the newest, closest place, before we ran out of gas driving around. LOL
It's no shock to me that I work in social services, and am a teacher, and my day job involves talking and helping people....all day! and that my hobbies include....teaching and talking and helping people. i also am very into inter species communication...and teach tha
Posted by R1g0rM0rT1s
and yeah....you sound full of yourself but i suspect the embellishment is probably exaggerated (definitely unnecessary) and that you're actually very insecure.
The follow up posts with paragraph amongst paragraph explaining herself kinda proves that.
And OP, I honestly don't care what your background is. In regard to this guy, I do not understand why you felt the need to keep pointing out so much that men practically hang off of you. You could have simply left it at "I'm used to guys moving much faster and this guy is moving much much slower. wtf?"
But instead, you decide to go into great detail about why these men are attracted to you and the like, which gives off a different impression of you.
Less useless details and more details that matter.
I also wonder that because this guy ISN'T moving fast and stroking your ego is why you can't stop thinking about him. If you're used to guys hanging off of you and wanting in your pants and suddenly this guy isn't doing the same, it could be why you're starting to obsess over him. It could be a classic case of "I want what I can't have," which is notorious for Libra men. Maybe so for Libra women? And will you grow bored of him once you get what you want?
And if you genuinely like this guy, fine. But you basically started out with "omg, I'm so used to guys HANGING off of me and this one won't!! How do I get him to hang off of me!" Are you sure you genuinely like him for him, or because you haven't been able to conquer this guy because he's not drooling at you?
How about you just take it as it goes? He seems to at least have some sort of friendly interest that could potentially turn into more. But we can't read his mind and your stories are full of useless details which tells me that you're reading way too much into little things. Women are notorious for this when they like someone and and read into every tiny action to see if it tells them more.
In this case, you mention divorce and you seem to be really overlooking the obvious with this- ANYONE would be likely to take it slow as a divorce is going on. They just got out of a marriage and may want to just go with the flow because not everyone jumps into new relationships after a failed one. They're protecting themselves and healing from the beating their emotions are taking from that major life event.
That said, slow your panties down and just take it as it goes.
Rocky she may not be exaggerating about the men dripping off of her . If you look at her chart there are some (astrologically)usefull solid facts : She's Venus trine Mars ,it speaks volumes for sexuality , men will be magnetically drawn to her . She is also Libra sun/Gemini Moon = naturally social butterfly and very popular (I should know -I have the same Sun/Moon).How she uses these 'gifts' is up to her..
Thanks rocky road. i dont think they are useless details at all, because i wonder the same thing. that is why i mentioned them. wondering if THAT is the reason why i am attracted to him. that he is NOT hanging all over me. trust me, i'm scared to death that THAT might actually be the reason, and why i sought second opinions. so to me, the details are not useless at all. as for "women" only over analyzing things....yup we sure do tend to do so. me, not so much....till this one guy. not that i don't analyze, i just tend to get bored and don't care so much why a guy may not like me. i am who i am, either he likes me or doesn't. not that i don't self analyze....i think this whole thing proves i do. but i do want to say that this guy has been NOT paying attention to me for 3 months, and it did not get to me until last week. i'm merely saying i am not used to it. wondering if it is normal for a libra to court like this. i also am well aware of gun shy protection due to going thru a divorce....as i am going thru one too, not just him, so i am far form "over looking" that fact. i was not looking for anything serious because of that. not to mention we have mutual friends and mutual events that we go to. i did not want to cause any sort of awkward situation for us if it doesn't work out or something like that. and who knows...maybe i am full of myself.....but the opposite is a lack of confidence in ones self....as a libra...i try to find the balance in it all. and a lack of confidence used to be my major issue.
but i can say, i do like him for HIM. he is cute, funny, charming, respectful, normal social skills and full of chivalry. i'm just not used to it.
thanks for the advice.
but i can say, i do like him for HIM. he is cute, funny, charming, respectful, normal social skills and full of chivalry. i'm just not used to it.
thanks for the advice.
Maybe he's gay
thanks thultra79. I sincerely appreciate that. funny thing is that i didn't take notice of him until he actually DID express interest in me. the previous couple of months, when he could have been labeled as "that which i cannot have" it didn't bother me. my friends kept asking me about him, i kept telling them "I'll see him when i see him". I just got off the phone with a mutual friend who wanted to know how it went. we talked about how it's good i haven't gotten bored and blown him off yet like i can easily do when things go too slow. for god sakes, sap has left tree's faster than this. the fact that i am still interested and starting to chill out and go with the flow is a good thing. I don't handle boredom well, and this is good practice. Normally i hit the clubs and socialize and this weekend I stayed home. progress one day at a time.
and yes, I can be like you, rushing and then waking up in wonderland dazed and confused. But that was my past. this time around i seem to have the opposite going on where i am not attatching at all. but then, we are not talking about good quality men either, so maybe that is it. My friends all think it is awesome too that i like him. as similar as we are, both being libra's and all, we are honestly quite different. almost like yin and yang within the same circle though. the best example i can give of this is....he is very organized with his stuff but he himself is always lost, I know where "i" am/going but am constantly losing my stuff. see, we're both "lost" there was this one period where i locked my keys in my car 7 times in 30 days....when i could of course find them. needless to say triple will no longer let me be a member...LOL.
as for some people online, hate begets hate, and kharma is a B*&% $ #, I let her deal with it. I know what is in my soul and what I give to others on a daily basis. thanks for the support 😉
and yes, I can be like you, rushing and then waking up in wonderland dazed and confused. But that was my past. this time around i seem to have the opposite going on where i am not attatching at all. but then, we are not talking about good quality men either, so maybe that is it. My friends all think it is awesome too that i like him. as similar as we are, both being libra's and all, we are honestly quite different. almost like yin and yang within the same circle though. the best example i can give of this is....he is very organized with his stuff but he himself is always lost, I know where "i" am/going but am constantly losing my stuff. see, we're both "lost" there was this one period where i locked my keys in my car 7 times in 30 days....when i could of course find them. needless to say triple will no longer let me be a member...LOL.
as for some people online, hate begets hate, and kharma is a B*&% $ #, I let her deal with it. I know what is in my soul and what I give to others on a daily basis. thanks for the support 😉
Thanks LGM, that is good to know. maybe i have some strong pheromones too LOL ;p even at the gay bar, gay guys are drawn to me. not sexually, though one did offer to "help a girl out"....LOL In the last 3 months, I have also been approached by 3 lesbians, 1 bisexual woman, and two married couples looking for a playmate. must be my shampoo! 😉
Posted by AliKat
This is where I would normally be bored and move on, but for some reason I can't stop thinking about him. Day, night, first thing in the morning etc.......But no matter how hard I try to stop thinking about him, I can't. It's usually not that hard to tell if a guy is into me, but he is like trying to know what a book about when the cover has no words or pictures.
it's all here. the reason you can't stop thinking about him. he's created uncertainty through his behaviour. if he offered himself on a plate you would be bored instantly.
sorry if i sounded harsh in my judgement. i just get called a cougar alot and i find it really insulting. if a younger guy hits on me it is not because i have made the first approach. i just think the term makes us sound like kerb crawlers, lol.
women get better and better with age in many respects but you can't fight the ageing process. the women my age i see with younger men who are trying to project a more youthful image themselves are pathetic imo. there is absolutely nothing wrong with getting older and it sure as hell beats the alternative.
i have my moon and venus in libra. if someone i am attracted to starts pulling away or blowing hot and cold, i want them more. there's absolutely no rationale to it at all. in that situation i have no choice but to disappear into the background...that would be my scorp sun.
i find standing back and ceasing contact clears up everything.
No worries rigamortis....it's all good. i too was a bit offended at first with the cougar references made of me. but hey, i can think of far worse things someone can call me. i think there are many reasons a woman can be with a younger man, not all are superficial. my 29yo was brought to me via the venus retrograde. i firmly believe it was fate, and that we are past life lovers, destined to meet in this lifetime, but not destined to be together. thru him i gained the courage to leave my husband. we are now best friends. he is a capricorn, our relationship was nothing short of disaster. but, as friends we are thick as thieves. few people can keep up with me. he is one of them. we can talk for hours on end and never get bored of each others company. not to mention...he is awesome at the one thing my husband was not. i'll let you guess as to what that was 😉 However, while "athletic" a "lover" he was not. no too immature.
upon serious reflection, i honestly have to say that I am not drawn to the "mystery" of a man playing hard to get. I guess i am more of an attention hound, and when i'm not getting it, i tend to wander rather than chase. don't get me wrong, not a cheater. just that in the last few months of me being single, looking back, when any of my suitors seemed to even remotely lose interest, i'm gone with the wind and never look back...on to the next. but.....warning libra logic coming.....now that i think about it a tad bit more...i have laid off the "fun" for a while, and i don't have a whole box of chocolate to distract me with shiny things right now either. so it still could be the reason. like you said, not rational at all. it'll probably drive me batty for weeks before i figure it out or die trying.
another libra moment here. i think i just got what you said....and said it myself another way. i do 'want' them, but leave them anyways, then they are forgotten in a flash. guess that's the same as standing back and ceasing contact. clears up = forgotten.
whew....for an intelligent woman i sure did screw that up....lol
on another note. this one guy i was talking to a while back, contacted me again. i liked him, but he flaked on me, forgoten 20 min later at the club. anyways, i chatted w him a bit, he wants to see me. he's sooooo cute, i figured that my libra isn't going anywhere fast, were not even "dating" no harm in playing the field till i know he is really interested in me.
upon serious reflection, i honestly have to say that I am not drawn to the "mystery" of a man playing hard to get. I guess i am more of an attention hound, and when i'm not getting it, i tend to wander rather than chase. don't get me wrong, not a cheater. just that in the last few months of me being single, looking back, when any of my suitors seemed to even remotely lose interest, i'm gone with the wind and never look back...on to the next. but.....warning libra logic coming.....now that i think about it a tad bit more...i have laid off the "fun" for a while, and i don't have a whole box of chocolate to distract me with shiny things right now either. so it still could be the reason. like you said, not rational at all. it'll probably drive me batty for weeks before i figure it out or die trying.
another libra moment here. i think i just got what you said....and said it myself another way. i do 'want' them, but leave them anyways, then they are forgotten in a flash. guess that's the same as standing back and ceasing contact. clears up = forgotten.
whew....for an intelligent woman i sure did screw that up....lol
on another note. this one guy i was talking to a while back, contacted me again. i liked him, but he flaked on me, forgoten 20 min later at the club. anyways, i chatted w him a bit, he wants to see me. he's sooooo cute, i figured that my libra isn't going anywhere fast, were not even "dating" no harm in playing the field till i know he is really interested in me.
keep in mind i was super hot for this guy, in a different way than for my libra, a while back. i was worried i'd forget my libra in the hot chemistry thing. NOPE....all i could think of today is libra man. libra man libra man libra man. hot guy never crossed my mind. i got it bad !!!!!
thanks lenore. we actually FINALLY got together. yes he is masculine but in a non assuming kind of way. he got me hook line n sinker. i definately know more about him now. he is virgo rising, libra sun on the cusp of virgo, moon in leo, mercury in libra, venus in scorpio, mars in cancer, jupiter in pisces. and knowing this, helps me know him better and it makes total sense. he is VERY good at asking questions, yet avoiding answering them (the ones where he doesn't want me know his little plans in his head) he is a take charge kind of man, he knows i will say no to things, such as him offering to help me with something. i have a hard time accepting help. so he just does it. there is no question for me to say no to. he is definitely all libra in his decision making....needs loads of time to think and debate with himself in his head, just like me. but his virgo perfectionist tendencies shine thru. all of the questions/plans he makes without my input have been things that would be stress inducing for me if i had to worry that he was 'thinking' about it. he seems to be just taking action rather than stress me out. things like discussion about meeting my son, or if the ex shows up out of no where. i'm starting to notice what one of his little "questions" looks like...the ones where i get no response when i ask him "why" he is asking (after i ansswer of course) 20 min later, out of the blue i see where he was going with asking it. also, somehow when i ask him a question....I find myself answering one instead of him. he's very good at that. don't get me wrong, he's actually very open, but sometimes i don't get the answer for hours or days...and then out of the blue he just "shares" with me.
he is also the most passionate lover i have ever had...i think it is the libra combined with the venus in scorpio— at one point i expected animal planet to show up with a documentary crew....LMAO. i can also see the leo in him as well. he seems to be the perfect example of his chart. but i am new at this 'complete' chart thing.
he is amazing. he's a sweet, charming, patient, passionate, reserved, funny, attentive, loving, proud, humble, generous, take charge MAN. blows all the little boys out of the water for sure.
i'm almost scared. i've had more panic attacks, freak out moments, and pure bliss than i ever could have imagined.
oh, he definately was worried i would reject him due to me rejecting him 20ys ago. my bad!
he is also the most passionate lover i have ever had...i think it is the libra combined with the venus in scorpio— at one point i expected animal planet to show up with a documentary crew....LMAO. i can also see the leo in him as well. he seems to be the perfect example of his chart. but i am new at this 'complete' chart thing.
he is amazing. he's a sweet, charming, patient, passionate, reserved, funny, attentive, loving, proud, humble, generous, take charge MAN. blows all the little boys out of the water for sure.
i'm almost scared. i've had more panic attacks, freak out moments, and pure bliss than i ever could have imagined.
oh, he definately was worried i would reject him due to me rejecting him 20ys ago. my bad!
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