Introduced as friend.

So, I've been with my Libra for 10 months - we're exclusive, we've had a few minor bumps in the road, but overall everything's been good. So, last night we're out dancing and hanging - both social butterflies, both having fun. Then, he introduced me as his "friend" to another friend of his (male). What?!?!?

Pbly someone whom he hasn't already talked to him about you. Just go with it. Next time you have an opportunity to introduce him to someone, make sure he hears you say "This is my BOYFriend..."

Yeah, I did just go with it, but it bugs me. I guess I put a lot of emphasis on language - maybe more than a lot of other people. I'm pretty sure he's never talked to this guy about me - they aren't close friends.

Unless HE does not know how YOU see it. We are very fair and don't cross territories very easily...

If you've not had the chat between the two of you...

We've had the chat about being exclusive, he's referred to us as a couple before, and I've referred to him as my boyfriend.

I'm not sure, but it might be a cultural thing - he is Arabic. I've heard him refer to his friends' girlfriends as "his friend or girlfriend, whatever".

Anyways, I think we're due for a light little relationship talk anyways - this might be a perfect question to open with.

I agree. He is protecting you and the relationship. This way no judgement can be passed on it.

OMG, he's Arabic, too, huh? Mr. Libra I was dealing with is Arabic. Lebanese?

No, he is Moroccan. Which is another source of minor relationship insecurity for me. He is thinking he may move back there - probably not anytime soon, but at some point.

no relationship tawk!

relationship tawks are the relationship killer.

If you have to say something say it in one sentence in a detached unemotional way: I would prefer that you refer to me as girlfriend when you introduce me to someone new.

that's it.

Well, it's been 10 months and I have a clear sense of what I want in my future. I really want to know if we are wanting the same things (i.e., marriage SOMEDAY - not ready now, etc.). So how do I talk about that without talking about the relationship?

you can't really talk about that right now....you and he aren't sure if he's moving back or not. wait until there's solid confirmation that he's staying.

if he's thinking about moving back there, but can't give you a timeframe, then sounds to me like he's using that as his crutch for progressing to the next level....just like Mr. Libra used his family with me.

those bastages.

Yeah, that's kind of what I think. I do think he's either afraid of taking the next step, really on the fence about it, or he knows he doesn't want to take that step with me, but he also doesn't want to be alone right now.

OR he really doesn't know what he wants at the core - does he stay, does he go, does he stay, does he go? I feel sometimes like he uses that as a way to get input from me about where I'm at with things. Whenever he brings it up (which is not all that often) - he will say, "you know what I mean?" repeatedly until he gets an answer from me. One time he was thinking of going to NYC and he asked me what I thought...I said, "go if you must, but I wouldn't like it". His response was "I don't want to go, sometimes I just say things."

I know this might sound like a irrelevant question, but I have a reason for asking this:

the male friend he introduced to you, was he also Arabic?

No, he was from Kenya. Why do you ask?

Thinking to the cultural differences. My thought escaped me though.

Ammorocks

He's not just saying things. It sounds to me that he has decisions to make and is trying to see his position in your life/heart. If you see a future then he can take you into account and decide with you in mind. But he cannot be direct - this does not mean he does not want to know. But he cannot start the discussion.

If you want to talk then talk but don't ask him for a reply or anything and keep it short - either he'll jump in or not, both reactions are fine.

Like, you're in the car and you don't have to look at each other, both looking straight ahead and just say that you 'feel good' or 'happy' 'at the moment' (praise him in an indirect way). Something like that...

This comment is within a conversation already taking place - not completely out of the blue...

antibling.."saying 'girlfriend' can sound a bit cheesy"

This is very true.. and if you are not prepared with what to say when others approach you two, something like this could come out. Why not just say.. "Hey, I thought it was kind of strange the other day when you introduced me as your friend, what is our title exactly, just so we will both know how to correctly reference our relationship to others.."

What'cha think Libra's.. would that work?