Update

Ok guys well you've been going along with this for a while now and yep, you're probably getting sick of it but here goes:

Basically its been up and down for almost 3 months now and I've gone through the many rollercoaster rides (yes LS I know that's not long in your world compared to your Leo friend LOL), and the patience and the waiting and hoping and yada yada yada.

Now, over the past week odd things have been changing:

* Contacts me first (this did not happen before)
* Doesn't go to his chat sites as much any more (he was addicted big time)
* Is taking care of himself a lot more lately - exercising for a start
* Is asking for my opinion and even takes up some suggestions
* Laughs (this was rare previously)...and soooooo good to see!!
* Calls his ex "the ex" now rather than by her name LOL
* Hints at going out to places I have recommended (dunno if that is a hint for
me to ask him or not - sheesh do I have to do ALL the work?? sheesh!!)
* He shows a little emotion now
* We see eachother more regularly now (before it was at his whim or whenever he could fit me in)
* He remembers lots of little things about our discussions
* He keeps my texts stored in his phone - awwwwwwwwww that is so cute and surprised the heck out of me!!

What do you all think? is there a chance he might be starting *fingers crossed* to think that I might be worth a shot?? or am I reading way too much into these changes?

*dreams on* 🙂

I think it's too soon to get your hopes up. It sounds like he is seeing you as a friend, which is definitely good.

oh goodie LOL

Chatz.. well he is definitely showing more interest (yeah!!) *hi-5* but don't get overly excited.. just pace yourself and keep a level head.. tell yourself, whatever happens you will be fine, but have fun with it. Don't be so serious, just let it happen. You will know for sure that he is yours when he tells you he wants you to be his girl.. until then, I learned from this board, we should not get our hopes up...

I am glad things are progressing nicely...🙂

*goes back to play B* LOL....yeah thanks I know but I thought it was a glimmer of hope and had to share it with you guys coz well I just had to.....*is happy regardless*....oh and I like the HIgh 5!~!!!!

Ok Im ready to jump in the car and head home - catch you all later - play nicely 🙂

grrrrr plan B that is

Based on all of your points things are looking up. If his cynicism starts to fade when he is around you that is a good sign as well.

gemfox ** Other callers would sometimes be dismissed,but he always wanted
my calls!!! talk about sweet,huh?

tats one thing which goes btween gemini and libra. Normal case we go exclusive when we fall for a gemini. i have done that one time and exclusive means it was purely exclusive. Not a single person can reach us when we talk with gemini.

nic I was going to write about the cynicism....he's just being too nice now LOL....Im not sure what to think - he's done a complete turnaround....but we will see - thanks to all 🙂

damn, Im not a gemini LOL

...Me either Chatz.. but my libra does not take calls while we are talking.. maybe because we don't talk that much and when we do it is usually packed full of interesting stuff.. I dunno??

Chatz.. you don't want to be a gem just for a guy.. you want to be a Leo and I want to be an Aqua.. that's what makes us unique and special in our own way.. not all gems are great and not all libras are either.. but we are!! Be confident girly..

*** Normal case we go exclusive when we fall for a gemini. i have done that one time and exclusive means it was purely exclusive. Not a single person can reach us when we talk with gemini.

I have dated two and didn't commit to either. This is not necessarily true. One is now a very dear friend but was not life style compatible with me.

lol Brats I wouldn't want to be a gemini 🙂 and yeah re: the not taking calls - at first I thought it was strange but who cares?? LOL

Aqua,
Your totally right. All of this waiting and wondering your guys are making you do and not getting discouraged is showing them that your feelings are genuine. The need from this comes from different things, we are adamant about not getting hurt and we need to know that our interrest isn't going anywhere soon before we start to open up. Such pains in the ass aren't we. If everything works out though, the rewards are pretty great.

Nic.. I agree with you, the rewards will be great.. and with most libras if things don't work out, you still have a friend for life..

However, I did a relationship match on cafeastrology.com between me and my libra best-friend and it said that we could not be friends after the relationship ended because the passion we felt for eachother would always be rekindled and it would be too overwhelming.

That kind of scared me.. 😢

hmmmmm that is a tad troubling.....ok just be lovers and not friends - easy fix 🙂.......or even better......DONT LET THE RELATIONSHIP END 🙂 🙂 🙂

I don't see why that is a problem. that is the same issue my Virgo ex and I have and it isn't really an issue. If we are both single and the passion takes over we give in. No harm no foul, just AMAZING sex. Then back to normal.

Nic.. I can only imagine how difficult my life will be then.. look at me now and we have not even kissed yet...

Chatz.. guess that would be the best option huh!! Lovers and friends... the best of both worlds...🙂 Then what would I talk to you fine people about?? I will have no troubles once I get him, let the libra men tell it..

I guess I am kindof weird in the way I see that type of situation. Say everything works out and you both genuinely fall in love with each other and then something happens and you guys aren't together anymore. Most people see that as tragedy, I am just greatful that I got to experience that with somoene who felt as strongly as I did.

If only we could see things that way *sigh*

Aaaaaaaaaand lets hope the rewards will be that great 🙂

I miss that I can't update date you guys on anything. In the past few days, I've managed to walk away from Mr. Libra, tell Libra #2 off, and just kind of hiding from Libra #3. Probably for the best. My surgery is Friday, so best I not create any drama until well after I've recovered.

oh HP!!! You have your hands full with those Librans!! wishing you all the very best for Friday all the way from Australia....its late Thursday afternoon here soooo wishing you a speedy recovery for tomorrow 🙂 Let us know as soon as you can as to how you are doing...*hugs*

Thanks, I will. I'll log in as soon as I'm up to it.

ooooooo, I love hugs!!!

Chatz.. what's been up with Mr. Libra?? You've been kinda quite.. must be very busy over there!!

HP74.. I hope all goes well Friday.. this must be a pretty serious health issue.. I wish you a speedy recovery and YES, keep those dang libras away for a while anyway.. you need to get your rest.. 🙂

hey Brats...Im in that inbetween stage now...you know the highs (cloud 9, etc) and now the silence and waiting game (3 days now - its typically between 3&5 days)....the awful times but Im riding it out QUIETLY and with as little fuss as humanly possible LOL....or should I whinge?? hehehe

thanks, brat. mr. libra called me last night (hadn't heard from him in 4 days) to wish me well tomorrow. see, he still thinks about me. 🙂

Of course he does. If he cared about you, he cared about you. You can't change that. 🙂

Good luck with your surgery tomorrow. Let us know how it goes. k?

Hmmmm Im grumpy today....haven't heard from Mr Libra since the 1st (today is the 5th)...*sigh*....I hate these in between days.....I do NOT know how you do this aquabrat!!! I'll go back to my chocolates now.

Chatz - I went through this with my Libra in the beginning - it was pure hell!

At one point, I started to call him VERY occasionally and he liked it. I would call, but just to say "hi". Not ask him to hang out or whatever and if he asked I told him I had plans, but "maybe tomorrow" or whenever. This seemed to drive him a little mad - he got pissy that I was trying to do things on my terms, however, I feel that at this point it has balanced out the relationship very nicely. I'm at a point now where I can call him whenever I feel like it - I don't have to sit and wait for him. BUT, now that I've got that option, I usually will wait for him to call.

Fun and games, fun and games!

ammorocks..
The same here. During the first year with my libra I was utterly frustrated.. not that I am not now.. but it was a whole lot worse then.. I did not understand the pattern and did not have good people like you all to chat with about such things. Took a whole year and a lot of tears and frustration, but I got the message.. at one point, actually the first 2 years of it, it was implied that I would call him everyday at work. I had his 800# and we would talk for at least 4 hours.. 2 years. But I got frustrated quickly as he had a girlfriend and I was his emotional bloodline, so he could keep loving her and leaching off of me to get what he needed emotionally. I started realizing what was going on after about 3 years and started pulling away a lot.
Then they broke up.

Now I am like you and we have a good understanding and I can call whenever I want, no pressure and he is always excited to talk to me, but I tend to wait for his call. Actually, I could call at 4 in the morning and he would wake up and talk, like it was 4 in the evening.. would not think anything strange about me calling him like that. It's weird.

Just takes a lot of time and patience dear Chatz...

Hey girls

When you are extra nice to us we don't realise that you only do that with us, we will always think 's/he does that with everyone'. I mean, there is no proof...and you cannot ask.

Brat, why are you not asleep?

So when a Libra woman frustrates you does that mean she loves you? 'Seems they can keep these frustrating scenarios going for a long time! ('Course I'm an Aries and we ain't exactly known for patience!). And does the frustration FINALLY quit to a decision or does it just go on and on (unbalanced scales going back and forth perhaps?). I guess part of this question is HOW do Libras make definitive decisions regarding true love?

Atom.."I guess part of this question is HOW do Libras make definitive decisions regarding true love?"

Man you need to read through this board completely.. All the threads, well 99% are about us women frustrated over our libra men.. Join the club.. It appears it don't get no better.. until you actually get them. I mean they actually say, "I am your woman and you are my man", type of thing..

..Sorry can't be of more help.. seriously read through these threads.. you will see what I mean..

Libra.. how are you hun? How are things going with your libra?? I am a night owl now. When I can not sleep I get online.. I use to watch tv.. now (as a friend once said...) I indulge instead of being a spectator.. 😉

indulge? hmmmmm sounds interesting Bratty one 🙂

Chatz.. I know right.. "now I indulge" sounds a lot more fun than.. "I chat.."... "I indulge" yeah.. if I start using that line in my everyday life people would think me stranger than they already do.. I guess I will just save lines like that for your fine people.. It's not my line anyway.. someone lent it to me..

lol...indulging sounds so much more fun 🙂 I guess we are all indulging here hehehe

Well tonight I received the news I'd been hoping not to LOL....I finally, yesterday lay what I felt on the line...not as such but I made an indication that I wanted more of our r/ship than what we had but today...and yes, it took him more than 36 hours to come back to me with "By my own admission I am not ready for a relationship and don't know when I will be but I would like to continue seeing you the way we have been and see where things go"....so I guess its decision time as to whether I want to continue the friends with benefits or move on....can I do this? Im not sure - I am totally hooked...would I be a fool to feel this way and continue with what he wants? will I get hurt? of course....is there hope that more will eventuate? probably not - gawd talk about sweet and sour. All the signs seemed to be there that he felt the same way and I feel I have totally unbalanced him by having him say what he said....why didn't I just keep my mouth shut— I don't know...I've done so well in the past but at 3 months I guess I thought it was time.....silly me but I guess I have the FWB - what do you guys think? shall I walk away? and if so, how— LOL

Hmmmmm here I go again. Rollercoaster ride number...oh who knows.

Chatz.. I sent you a message but I had not checked this yet.. Sorry for your disappointment.. It is good, however, that you were clear and up front about your feelings for him.. That is needed to relieve you of the tensions and stress of keeping it inside. You are to be commended for that.. I know that was a big move for you. His answer was not all that bad. He does want to continue to see you, so that is a positive, it is just that right now he does not want anything serious. That gives you some leverage, because now you know how to proceed.. right.

Now, I am an aqua and we can do this, but I am not sure if you can, so you cannot blame me if it goes bad but just take note.. what I would do if I still wanted to continue seeing this guy is, take my emotions and feelings back, and continue on. How do I do that, you say?? Lem'me tell you. First I would start dating others ASAP, needs to be good quality though, or else you're just going to feel worse. Second, write down all the bad qualities about this guy.. the things you hate, his bad morning breath, his indecisiveness, the pants he wears too tight.. whatever it is, write it down, memorize it, visualize it.. you will need it for later, when he is in your face and you are feeling particularly vulnerable to falling for him again. If you do it right, when ever you see him all this bad qualities will come to mind first, and whatever he says after that won't too much matter, because the bad stuff will outshine what ever he is trying to put in your head at the time.. There is a loophole though.. if he suspects your pulling back, he may pull some tricks out of his sleeve, so be ready for every possible thing he could do to try to get inside your head again. Let him know, you respect him being honest but you still feel the same, however, you know in time your feeling will fade and you all will be able to be good buddies. And when he calls or messages you, you are on your way out the door, on a date or hanging out with your girls and will return his call later. Tell him about the other guys you are dating, just like you are buddies, and let him tell you his experiences or ask for his experiences. This will help you also get over any feelings. Every time he does something you don't like, write it down and remember it.. then play on your own terms. Have him over, only when you want to and are strong enough to handle him and don't let him spend the night.. too much cuddle time.. he has to go.

Gotta start weaning him off of you.. like a mother does to her pups.. it is hard, but must be done.. once he sees what he is losing, maybe it may jump-start his heart. He seems to be way too comfortable right now with the situation. So we need to make him a little less comfortable and see how he likes it.

Now this is my advice.. see what the libras suggest and even the guys.. but I am pretty sure I am on the right track. The only other option is to cut him off cold turkey, and I know you can't do that. So that is completely unrealistic at this point. However, after reviewing all his bad traits it might not be so hard to do...(playin') it is gonna kill you either way, but the way I described previously, is less painful over a longer period of time.

Luv ya bunches! *hugs*

HP, sounds like your Libra definitely cares for you and yes as expected he will continue to check on you and because he cares and saw you out with someone else, he will want to "keep his options open", therefore he will continue to contact you from time to time, so he doesn't lose that connection completely. Although my libra friend is back with his ex... He is still bad... sending me text msgs and called a couple of times hinting at first hooking up, then that he misses me, then straight out - I would love to get together with you... I had to remind him he is now in a relationship, however going to have coffee or something (in public) would be fine... He said, that is why I am so special to him, because I am unsefish when it comes to him. Blah, blah, blah, I miss his company but if he is happy then I am too.

Chatz, just because he isn't ready now, doesn't mean he never will be. Unless you have other prospects keep up the FWB if that makes you feel good, however, don't let him be the center of your world now that he has made his position clear. Hang out with friends, go on other dates - you don't have to shag any of them, but it is nice to be taken out. I know how when you start shagging a Libra and it is good, you don't have a need to shag anyone else, but if they are'nt doing other things with you, it is Ok if someone else does.

Thank you ladies....I will see him on Wednesday night...there's a few things going on with family and he wants to be there (which is really sweet) and of course he will stay the night which yes, will make things worse coz yes he cuddles all night damnit!! LOL......we'll see if I can turn my emotions off and you are right Aqua....I need to move forward and let him know that I was worth keeping...if he doesnt see it that way it is his loss...he isn't getting any younger and hey, if he wants to keep chatting to all and sundry on his singles sites? then there is something wrong there, especially when somebody he clearly likes has put her heart out there....whatever but Im still going to see where we go from here for the time being and yes I will go out with others....already thought about that last night - he has to realise that not everything revolves around him which it has to date LOL.

Im not sure though that if I walk away he would try to pursuade me otherwise as he did say "i understand either way as to what you want to do"....I think he would be prepared to not see me again rather than try to change my mind but does he have to? nup, he's got that charm and he knows it. Just dont want things to be awkward - I dread that part.

Hmmm anyway up and on 🙂

Chatz.. seems like you have a really good outlook on things.. Yeah!! Very optimistic, I love that in you.. keep the high spirits up!

🙂

Its called self preservation LOL......I've done all the things that were suggested on the board so its not for want of trying but no, not too hard - I had the balance but he's just not in that right place or he's scared or Im just not the one who does it for him...who knows and who knows if I can hang around until he makes up his mind but one thing I do know, is that he is not seeing others but may now decide to do so. He's left it in my hands as to where we go from here but now I feel he will only see me coz he doesn't want to hurt me, blah, blah, blah.

Still can't wait to see him on Wednesday night 😢

Chatz - DEFINATELY start seeing other people right away.

I say this b/c when I was first dating my Libra, he asked me... "Do you think we can be in a relationship and still see other people?" I said, "Yes, but if I start seeing other people, I'm likely to meet someone else that I'm happy with. Can you handle that?" He said, "No, I don't think I could." And yet, we left it at that. The minute I started dating other guys, he declared a relationship. It took me a month or so to really come around, and he was waiting... He kept calling, saying things like, "I just want you to be happy." AND "If we're not going to be together, I need to know now, so I can just cut it off. I think with Libran men it takes a little kick start, jump in the pants kind of action to show them what you're really worth. And, I know I don't know you, but as far as a message board can tell me, you're worth a whole lot and that much more! So, if he doesn't come around, oh well - you've got tastier fish to fry!

LOL thanks ammorocks!!! You are right and I will try that avenue but am still seeing him on Wednesday evening....perhaps even have a little talk and indeed use him up to bounce ideas off re: a family situation that he wants to help and support me with...at least he's there for me in that respect and said I should call day or night if I needed him (I haven't taken him up - perhaps I should have I don't know)...not all is lost, plus he wants to continue seeing me, just not be "involved"....but yes, I will seek other avenues now that I know how he feels and become harder to reach 🙂 I know I won't lose him but I wanted more *sigh*

Those eyes, that smile, those kisses, that chest....argghhhhh LOL. Not all is lost as I said but grrrrrrrrrrr