LoveMYLibra
@LoveMYLibra
8 Years
Comments: 0 · Posts: 1 · Topics: 1
Need help to win her love back!!!
You need to back off if you want her back. Why do all these things that can't be maintained? Those are the efforts that should for your woman when you are together..doing it out of guilt is vile to us.
Give her what she is telling you she wants and then go to counseling and figure out your ish. Depending on your history, she may or may not want you back.
Libra is gonna give as many chances as she can handle without getting upset. Once you've gone past that line though, it's over, period.
Libra is gonna give as many chances as she can handle without getting upset. Once you've gone past that line though, it's over, period.
Selfish. Let her go. If you really love her and "still in love with her" then you wouldn't have done all this shit.
As a Libra I will never, ever go back to a man who was unfaithful to me. I hope she comes to her senses and leave you for good.
As a Libra I will never, ever go back to a man who was unfaithful to me. I hope she comes to her senses and leave you for good.
Posted by 2MoonHe said he is a Sex addict! So he fucked someone. And now he loves her. Again.
(I'm not going to help someone that did something terrible.)
The real question is What did you do to her?
It’s afterfuck moment!
My question is why do you fuck another person when you love the one you are with? He wants her now when she is almost gone!
And apparently she found out about other times he cheated. It’s a mess!
Posted by DolluxxeWe don’t get it! He is sick. He needs sex as I need Xanax! It’s a pill! If he doesn’t get it - his balls hurt! So...she must forgive him. 😱
Selfish. Let her go. If you really love her and "still in love with her" then you wouldn't have done all this shit.
As a Libra I will never, ever go back to a man who was unfaithful to me. I hope she comes to her senses and leave you for good.
Posted by TimonI’ve got to see it!Posted by GemitatiLol I just asked the same question.
@lovemylibra
What is ‘somewhat unfaithful?’
Is it like you only inserted half of your dick?click to expand
Posted by 2MoonHe was ‘somewhat unfairhful’ Like half way she apparently walked in on them and he couldn’t get in all the way so he is calling it ‘somewhat unfaithful’.Posted by GemitatiWhat you said is a possibility 🙂Posted by 2MoonHe said he is a Sex addict! So he fucked someone. And now he loves her. Again.
(I'm not going to help someone that did something terrible.)
The real question is What did you do to her?
It’s afterfuck moment!
My question is why do you fuck another person when you love the one you are with? He wants her now when she is almost gone!
And apparently she found out about other times he cheated. It’s a mess!
He didn't really say what he did to her....
I want to know what he did.click to expand
And I don’t think hebis coming back with answers...
Posted by TimonLmao! Your post!!! 🤣🤣🤣Posted by GemitatiSee what? His dick? 😂😂😂Posted by TimonI’ve got to see it!Posted by GemitatiLol I just asked the same question.
@lovemylibra
What is ‘somewhat unfaithful?’
Is it like you only inserted half of your dick?
click to expand
But I swear after I clicked post message I KNEW it could sound...like that...lol
Thank you all for your sincere answers, I couldn't log in earlier, but here I am....
No I did not have sex with anyone. No I wasn't on a cocaine binge with Prostitues (lol) but the therapist Im going to says I have an addictive, obessive brain so that's why im going to all 3. . .
Scorpio, remember?
So as to "what I did?"
We were both drunk at a club, and a hot girl came up to me and started to kiss me. I was caught up in the moment and didn't think at ALL. I went with it, (while MY LIBRA watched from a distance) and didn't stop until she came up and tapped my shoulder. I was like a deer in the headlights, Shocked at myself very ashamed of my actions.
In the past, Ive gotten black out drunk and couldn't remember what Ive done, and acted like a fool so She is TIRED of it as an excuse. Shes forgiven me in the past for being in an alcoholic rage, and letting this monster show his ugly face, but this time is different. This is why Im here asking for your advice, which I do appreciate, even the negative Libras saying they wouldn't help me, & hope she finally leaves me, I respect your opinion, and I do deserve that I guess.. You all are honest at least.
I MESSED UP BIG TIME, as I NEVER, EVER have wanted to hurt my wife. I'm taking responsibility for my transgression, and not trying to dodge the issue or down play it at all. If the shoe was on the other foot, I would've been LIVID. So I get it. I've stopped drinking and smoking all together and am trying to clean up my act NOW.
Its just a very sad & pathetic place Im in now, because I cut her to the core.
Ive tried not to smother her, which she says isn't working, because Im giving her attention, but Im concerned to let her get used to being without me, because I know other guys are just waiting for the opportunity to court her. I AM VERY SELFISH, I admit it, but doesn't change the fact that we've been together all these years and built a home & beautiful family that I will NEVER stop fighting for. . .
To the Libras offering luck, I am grateful to you, to the others saying I've lost her, I hope your wrong, but very scared your right... And to buddy saying I'm DANGEROUS? THATS FUNNY, BUT REMEMBER, I AM A REAL DEAL SCORPIO, so you know I AM....
Anyways, I asked her if she missed me, she said sometimes when shes happy. When she remembers the ugly memory, she doesn't at all. I asked if she loved me, she said shell always love me as the father of her kids, but shes not IN LOVE WITH ME AT THE MOMENT... I reassured her that I've always been in love with her, ALWAYS WILL BE, and Ill do whatever it takes to win her love back. I don't want to give up on the best relationship Ive ever been blessed to be a part of. . .
Thank you ALL for your input. I'll keep you updated if it works out, or doesn't.
IF theres anything you think will help me (besides leaving) please share, as Im willing to do anything for US...
Thank you beautiful Libras.
No I did not have sex with anyone. No I wasn't on a cocaine binge with Prostitues (lol) but the therapist Im going to says I have an addictive, obessive brain so that's why im going to all 3. . .
Scorpio, remember?
So as to "what I did?"
We were both drunk at a club, and a hot girl came up to me and started to kiss me. I was caught up in the moment and didn't think at ALL. I went with it, (while MY LIBRA watched from a distance) and didn't stop until she came up and tapped my shoulder. I was like a deer in the headlights, Shocked at myself very ashamed of my actions.
In the past, Ive gotten black out drunk and couldn't remember what Ive done, and acted like a fool so She is TIRED of it as an excuse. Shes forgiven me in the past for being in an alcoholic rage, and letting this monster show his ugly face, but this time is different. This is why Im here asking for your advice, which I do appreciate, even the negative Libras saying they wouldn't help me, & hope she finally leaves me, I respect your opinion, and I do deserve that I guess.. You all are honest at least.
I MESSED UP BIG TIME, as I NEVER, EVER have wanted to hurt my wife. I'm taking responsibility for my transgression, and not trying to dodge the issue or down play it at all. If the shoe was on the other foot, I would've been LIVID. So I get it. I've stopped drinking and smoking all together and am trying to clean up my act NOW.
Its just a very sad & pathetic place Im in now, because I cut her to the core.
Ive tried not to smother her, which she says isn't working, because Im giving her attention, but Im concerned to let her get used to being without me, because I know other guys are just waiting for the opportunity to court her. I AM VERY SELFISH, I admit it, but doesn't change the fact that we've been together all these years and built a home & beautiful family that I will NEVER stop fighting for. . .
To the Libras offering luck, I am grateful to you, to the others saying I've lost her, I hope your wrong, but very scared your right... And to buddy saying I'm DANGEROUS? THATS FUNNY, BUT REMEMBER, I AM A REAL DEAL SCORPIO, so you know I AM....
Anyways, I asked her if she missed me, she said sometimes when shes happy. When she remembers the ugly memory, she doesn't at all. I asked if she loved me, she said shell always love me as the father of her kids, but shes not IN LOVE WITH ME AT THE MOMENT... I reassured her that I've always been in love with her, ALWAYS WILL BE, and Ill do whatever it takes to win her love back. I don't want to give up on the best relationship Ive ever been blessed to be a part of. . .
Thank you ALL for your input. I'll keep you updated if it works out, or doesn't.
IF theres anything you think will help me (besides leaving) please share, as Im willing to do anything for US...
Thank you beautiful Libras.
Posted by RooSagicornCant just "let her go" not even a consideration at the moment...
Let her go. It’s selfish to keep hurting her.
Posted by edgelordIm afraid your right... Hopefully she grants me ONE last chance, which I wont take for granted.
she's not gonna be YOUR libra for very much longer bro. you done fucked up.
Posted by sultrykittyI cant. I wont just leave our home. I hate to see her miserable, even though shes not showing it at all. shes very distant and cold towards me, but still cordial at the moment. If i left, it would definitely be the end, which Im not willing to do.
Give her what she is telling you she wants and then go to counseling and figure out your ish. Depending on your history, she may or may not want you back.
Libra is gonna give as many chances as she can handle without getting upset. Once you've gone past that line though, it's over, period.
Thats why Im here.
Posted by LoveMYlibraaPosted by RooSagicornCant just "let her go" not even a consideration at the moment...
Let her go. It’s selfish to keep hurting her.click to expand
Yes, I agree that I am very selfish, possessive, jealous, obsessive (Im working on all of this Trust me) but IF (when) I get her love back, Ill never hurt her again. . . That's a promise.
Posted by LoveMYlibraaAgain, by staying and trying to get her to accept your apologies, you're still trying to control the situation. To control HER. Regardless of what YOU do, SHE will still make her choice. It's best to take a step back and tell her through your actions that you respect her enough to give her what she wants. If that's another man, then it is what it is.Posted by sultrykittyI cant. I wont just leave our home. I hate to see her miserable, even though shes not showing it at all. shes very distant and cold towards me, but still cordial at the moment. If i left, it would definitely be the end, which Im not willing to do.
Give her what she is telling you she wants and then go to counseling and figure out your ish. Depending on your history, she may or may not want you back.
Libra is gonna give as many chances as she can handle without getting upset. Once you've gone past that line though, it's over, period.
Thats why Im here.
click to expand
My own intuition about the situation is that she won't entertain that idea if you give her the space she needs to really consider her options without you breathing down her neck. She can't do that if you're there.
While you're giving her the space she needs, you work with your therapist and really start acting as the husband she deserves. You CAN do that while not living together.
Posted by LoveMYLibraHoly shit, that sounds controlling AF. There's no forcing & willing your way in this situation. You want what you want without taking in consideration of what she wants and if she wants revenge, she'll have it. I know I do when someone does me dirty.
If I give her too much space, I risk losing her to another, since she has a lot of guy friends and her charming ways comes off as flirty (to me) and im sure them too . I try not to smother her, but its hard to stay away.
What do the Libras think? What can I do? ? ?
We don't forgive, nor forget, disloyalty.
That's rough and I'm sorry you're going through this....
When I caught on my Gem had been unfaithful (not sex, but... stuff) to me and we were in a similar situation after 13 yrs here's what happened:
He *BOUGHT* me things like it was going to remedy anything. I was laughing on the inside but I let him do it. I even picked out a pearl bracelet similar to one I knew one of his hoochies had. LOLOL. I know I'm kind of a sicko, but I just found it hilarious because I'm not materialistic. Idiot.
He took me places, great vacations I had always asked for (which made me sick really that he was doing it now but hadn't before - made me hate him more). I let him do it and I think I subconsciously made sure to ruin every trip. My anger flooded out of me at weird times. I remember spitting on him in a cab on an island.
When we got smart enough to separate and give space... I found out he was partying while I was gone. For the thin string he was already on I couldn't believe he had the nerve to go out. I was so so so sick at home staying with my parents just sick over the whole situation, and he was out surfing, partying, with new groups of people I didn't even know. It wasn't a guys' thing either. Females were included. That was my last straw. I found a rebound and dumped him hard. I made sure he found out about said rebound also. Not my greatest moment! Not something I'm proud of. But something I believe fully that he deserved in the end.
Again I'm sorry you are going through this. Do not think you can remedy this by buying, pleasing, travelling. Monetary things will do you no good here. It doesn't hurt to give sweet, well thought out presents, but don't think you are fixing anything with them. Your woman is pissed and will be till god knows when. Space is smart to save the vicious fighting. Check in on her and emotionally you have got to take absolutely everything she throws your way. Everything. Do not emotionally leave her side regardless of anything that happens between you two right now. Be present but not overbearing. Most of all, be understanding. You just ripped her world apart. I feel for her... Stay away from clubs, bars, alcohol and avoid females at all costs. Also, I mean you guys are married? I understand fun and going out, but I learned the hard way that married couples don't go to clubs and bars because they are MEAT MARKETS. What are you guys doing in places like that? Nothin' but trouble...
Best to you and especially best to her!
When I caught on my Gem had been unfaithful (not sex, but... stuff) to me and we were in a similar situation after 13 yrs here's what happened:
He *BOUGHT* me things like it was going to remedy anything. I was laughing on the inside but I let him do it. I even picked out a pearl bracelet similar to one I knew one of his hoochies had. LOLOL. I know I'm kind of a sicko, but I just found it hilarious because I'm not materialistic. Idiot.
He took me places, great vacations I had always asked for (which made me sick really that he was doing it now but hadn't before - made me hate him more). I let him do it and I think I subconsciously made sure to ruin every trip. My anger flooded out of me at weird times. I remember spitting on him in a cab on an island.
When we got smart enough to separate and give space... I found out he was partying while I was gone. For the thin string he was already on I couldn't believe he had the nerve to go out. I was so so so sick at home staying with my parents just sick over the whole situation, and he was out surfing, partying, with new groups of people I didn't even know. It wasn't a guys' thing either. Females were included. That was my last straw. I found a rebound and dumped him hard. I made sure he found out about said rebound also. Not my greatest moment! Not something I'm proud of. But something I believe fully that he deserved in the end.
Again I'm sorry you are going through this. Do not think you can remedy this by buying, pleasing, travelling. Monetary things will do you no good here. It doesn't hurt to give sweet, well thought out presents, but don't think you are fixing anything with them. Your woman is pissed and will be till god knows when. Space is smart to save the vicious fighting. Check in on her and emotionally you have got to take absolutely everything she throws your way. Everything. Do not emotionally leave her side regardless of anything that happens between you two right now. Be present but not overbearing. Most of all, be understanding. You just ripped her world apart. I feel for her... Stay away from clubs, bars, alcohol and avoid females at all costs. Also, I mean you guys are married? I understand fun and going out, but I learned the hard way that married couples don't go to clubs and bars because they are MEAT MARKETS. What are you guys doing in places like that? Nothin' but trouble...
Best to you and especially best to her!
Posted by TomSawyerLet alone hitting up a club after 15 years of marriage & kids. Not tryin to judge, but that bottle service, test tube shot, Pitbull feat. Flo Rida-life should've been over after the first kid.Posted by CaramelizedCoffeeAnd who the fuck brings their wife to a club.Posted by TomSawyerThis hot chick kissed him whilst he was drunk his wife was in the same club and witnessed him making out with this hot woman.
So how did you get caught?
Looooooolclick to expand
Posted by TomSawyerTrue. I would've gave more credit if it was a bar & not a club (unless they just really like dancing, which I didn't take into consideration).Posted by UrsaMediocreThen again, imagine 15 years of doing it.Posted by TomSawyerLet alone hitting up a club after 15 years of marriage & kids. Not tryin to judge, but that bottle service, test tube shot, Pitbull feat. Flo Rida-life should've been over after the first kid.Posted by CaramelizedCoffeeAnd who the fuck brings their wife to a club.Posted by TomSawyerThis hot chick kissed him whilst he was drunk his wife was in the same club and witnessed him making out with this hot woman.
So how did you get caught?
Loooooool
You're bound to need some nights out after that.
I guess the op was too happy, so he was doomed right from the start.
click to expand
Posted by TomSawyerOh, I've been therePosted by UrsaMediocreHere's a theory.Posted by TomSawyerTrue. I would've gave more credit if it was a bar & not a club (unless they just really like dancing, which I didn't take into consideration).Posted by UrsaMediocreThen again, imagine 15 years of doing it.Posted by TomSawyerLet alone hitting up a club after 15 years of marriage & kids. Not tryin to judge, but that bottle service, test tube shot, Pitbull feat. Flo Rida-life should've been over after the first kid.Posted by CaramelizedCoffeeAnd who the fuck brings their wife to a club.Posted by TomSawyerThis hot chick kissed him whilst he was drunk his wife was in the same club and witnessed him making out with this hot woman.
So how did you get caught?
Loooooool
You're bound to need some nights out after that.
I guess the op was too happy, so he was doomed right from the start.
Op and wife + 20 shots of vodka in 5 minutes + dancing = Op fucked upclick to expand
It’s a wrap .. you’ve been playing games wayyy too long for her to ever feel the same way about u.. fix the alcohol problem first .. still don’t think she will feel the same after 15 years of the same chit but hey I always say , u never knowww
Posted by tizianiYep that's how most of us roll
It sounds like you're assuming how she feels. I don't think playing it down is your problem, you're playing it up. Bringing the level of drama you're bringing, she will probably just buy thinking time away from you and make up reasons for being mad, on the fly till she can make a clean break. If you're false she will be false too.
Just be real, it's your only shot.
This Scorpio astrology stuff will cost you your marriage in no time with the drama.
Posted by hazeofpixiedustThank you hazeofpixiedust! This is why I found this website right here. I appreciate the real answer of what needs to be done, although everyone else's input has been noted too, you are the one that has shown me the way to my specific situation. I am grateful that everyone took a min out of their day to post on this thread
That's rough and I'm sorry you're going through this....
Again I'm sorry you are going through this. Do not think you can remedy this by buying, pleasing, travelling. Monetary things will do you no good here. It doesn't hurt to give sweet, well thought out presents, but don't think you are fixing anything with them. Your woman is pissed and will be till god knows when. Space is smart to save the vicious fighting. Check in on her and emotionally you have got to take absolutely everything she throws your way. Everything. Do not emotionally leave her side regardless of anything that happens between you two right now. Be present but not overbearing. Most of all, be understanding. You just ripped her world apart. I feel for her... Stay away from clubs, bars, alcohol and avoid females at all costs. Also, I mean you guys are married? I understand fun and going out, but I learned the hard way that married couples don't go to clubs and bars because they are MEAT MARKETS. What are you guys doing in places like that? Nothin' but trouble...
Best to you and especially best to her!
I know I've hurt her badly, and I have taken a step back and given her time to breathe. These past weeks, specifically the last couple of days I have taken all the verbal lashings, my heart and ego have been stomped on and bruised, and I've taken it ALL, no excuses, no denying complaining or arguing, just straight up remorse for my actions. I've been present and empathetic but not overbearing. She's actually welcomed this, so I've been able to give her the outlet to vent.
I have faith that this will work out, especially with the Gemini Full moon, I have optimism for new possibilities, reimagining the future. I have time to plan the mercury retrograde, so Ill have new strategies and I'm putting in the work in to let go of those old destructive patterns.
I've been sober all this time too, so that is an improvement to the overall situation as well...
Thanks again all you wonderfully honest, beautiful Libras, even the mean ones lol. . . I appreciate you ALL.
Posted by CaramelizedCoffeeYour absolutely right, CarmelizedCoffeeI was being foolish talking internet trash, and I know I've been an idiot getting drunk off my mind. I know....
Wtf is a real deal scorpio?
Loooooool dangerous?
Being a drunkard isn't dangerous
It's just pathetic
I am very proud of most of my scorpion characteristics, some more than others but I meant I am very RAW. I love being a stinger.
BUT if at the end of the day, your back is up against the wall and you are at risk of losing everything you hold dear, feeling desperate, wouldn't you be dangerous too?
Everything is much better now, were taking it day by day, all the advice is working. Slowly but surely.
What are her other placements? The ONLY way to win her back is consistency of your changed behavior, not a temp fix so you can win her back but I mean truly prove to her that what you say actually carries weight.
Posted by LibraMudraYour absolutely right, @LibraMudra, She let me know that I'm free to leave whenever I want, that she's only with me for the kids, and the years we've had together. I hope it gets better someday.
Give her space. It's her terms now. Maybe someday you'll get her back but it'll never be the same no matter what you buy for her.
She still hasn't forgiven me, but at least were coparenting and cohabitating for the moment.
I told her that Ill wait til eternity to get her love back.
didn't you say she was willing to go to the AA sessions with you ? that is a good step - keep that up to the max - if she's willing to do that perhaps she might be willing to go to some sort of marriage therapist
I have to give it to you - people do fuck up no doubt - so if you realize that you are wrong and are trying hard to fix it - I give you all the kudos in the world
it's the ones like my ex-husband who "didn't want to put the work in" to help fix the marriage - that came at a point that the arrow was pointing directly at him. Prior to that time he was able to charm the therapist into believing it was me that was the entire problem which I was furious at but left him go until he hung himself - of course even now after 4 years he is still whining that he is so sorry blah blah blah and misses me blah blah blah lol
I have to give it to you - people do fuck up no doubt - so if you realize that you are wrong and are trying hard to fix it - I give you all the kudos in the world
it's the ones like my ex-husband who "didn't want to put the work in" to help fix the marriage - that came at a point that the arrow was pointing directly at him. Prior to that time he was able to charm the therapist into believing it was me that was the entire problem which I was furious at but left him go until he hung himself - of course even now after 4 years he is still whining that he is so sorry blah blah blah and misses me blah blah blah lol
Posted by LoveMYLibraStart by taking responsibility. Own up to your fuck up.
She feels I betrayed her and our marriage by being somewhat unfaithful.
What can I do? ? ?
Even if she decided to give you another chance libra’s believe in fairness she may serve you like you served her and believe me that will hurt worst!
The problem is your stance on this whole issue. Most of your post describes how the Libra's actions are affecting you, yet you refrain from detailing how you hurt her in the first place. In reality you only want the Libra back for selfish reasons. Even the way you've described her makes it sound like she is somehow the problem. The best you can do is seek counseling for your issues, but know that for the Libra it is probably over.
Posted by Baddy4040
Even if she decided to give you another chance libra’s believe in fairness she may serve you like you served her and believe me that will hurt worst!
I'm dreading the day she unleashes her vengeance. I mentally preparing myself though.
Posted by tctaoI am putting in the work. We went to the marriage counseling recently.
didn't you say she was willing to go to the AA sessions with you ? that is a good step - keep that up to the max - if she's willing to do that perhaps she might be willing to go to some sort of marriage therapist
I have to give it to you - people do fuck up no doubt - so if you realize that you are wrong and are trying hard to fix it - I give you all the kudos in the world
it's the ones like my ex-husband who "didn't want to put the work in" to help fix the marriage - that came at a point that the arrow was pointing directly at him. Prior to that time he was able to charm the therapist into believing it was me that was the entire problem which I was furious at but left him go until he hung himself - of course even now after 4 years he is still whining that he is so sorry blah blah blah and misses me blah blah blah lol
Posted by ChuckcemPlease explain "my stance on the issue"? I might not see what your seeing.
The problem is your stance on this whole issue. Most of your post describes how the Libra's actions are affecting you, yet you refrain from detailing how you hurt her in the first place. In reality you only want the Libra back for selfish reasons. Even the way you've described her makes it sound like she is somehow the problem. The best you can do is seek counseling for your issues, but know that for the Libra it is probably over.
I detailed how I hurt her already, I disrespected her, and took her for granted.
Not sure how you think that I've made her sound like she's the problem? I get it, I am very selfish, but I'm not willing to let her walk away. I guess the selfish reasons being our family and long term relationship?
Hopefully your wrong, and Ill be able to salvage this relationship. The way she's behaving lately, it looks like I definitely have a good shot at fixing this. . .
Posted by LoveMYlibraait sounds like it - remember you are doing this for you first - it's a life style change and it takes time for both partiesPosted by tctaoI am putting in the work. We went to the marriage counseling recently.
didn't you say she was willing to go to the AA sessions with you ? that is a good step - keep that up to the max - if she's willing to do that perhaps she might be willing to go to some sort of marriage therapist
I have to give it to you - people do fuck up no doubt - so if you realize that you are wrong and are trying hard to fix it - I give you all the kudos in the world
it's the ones like my ex-husband who "didn't want to put the work in" to help fix the marriage - that came at a point that the arrow was pointing directly at him. Prior to that time he was able to charm the therapist into believing it was me that was the entire problem which I was furious at but left him go until he hung himself - of course even now after 4 years he is still whining that he is so sorry blah blah blah and misses me blah blah blah lol
click to expand
Posted by LoveMYlibraaPosted by Chuckcem
The problem is your stance on this whole issue. Most of your post describes how the Libra's actions are affecting you, yet you refrain from detailing how you hurt her in the first place. In reality you only want the Libra back for selfish reasons. Even the way you've described her makes it sound like she is somehow the problem. The best you can do is seek counseling for your issues, but know that for the Libra it is probably over.
Please explain "my stance on the issue"? I might not see what your seeing.
I detailed how I hurt her already, I disrespected her, and took her for granted.
Not sure how you think that I've made her sound like she's the problem? I get it, I am very selfish, but I'm not willing to let her walk away. I guess the selfish reasons being our family and long term relationship?
Hopefully your wrong, and Ill be able to salvage this relationship. The way she's behaving lately, it looks like I definitely have a good shot at fixing this. . .
It's the stance that she's being "vicious" and "lashing out". Your particular word choice(s) regarding her doesn't sound very loving. It sounds like you're trying to skirt part of the blame, while not painting a positive picture of the her. The way it reads seems emotionally manipulative as if this situation is somehow out of your hands (as shown in bold below):
I've been doing my research on how to win her heart back, and I'm doing everything in my power to change her view of a monster that I am.Meanwhile the details of what you did remain fairly vague. Given the context I'm going to assume that you cheated. Granted there are several ways to cheat (none of them that are good), but knowing this information would help everyone understand your situation. Were you caught sexting/flirting? Did you have sex with another woman? Did you get with a prostitute? What?
In the beginning of the problem she was furious, but stone cold.Told me she was DONE with us and verbally lashed out on everything I ever did that hurt her since the beginning of our relationship so many years ago. She wants a legal separation, and to move away after the holidays, but I'm not willing to let her go. Its been about 6 weeks since I hurt her, and she still is vicious towards me, but were doing baby steps.
Last night got ugly because she cant let go of this hurt and she says she cant help feeling anger, almost hatred towards me.She said she wants revenge and cannot forgive me. She says she doesn't know how to let go of the pain.
Likewise your solutions to win her back (aside from getting therapy) all seem superficial, as if you're trying to buy back her love with purchases and good works. If you cheated on your wife, the last things that are going to win her over are concerts and poems. It will all seem like a hollow gesture.
Might be too soon, but I'm trying my best to win her love back. Its been many years of us together in a blissful marriage, we have kids together, and I'm still totally in love with her. I took responsibility, been very apologetic and taken her shopping to concerts, writing her poems and am doing all I can to prove my love, your site has been very helpful but...If she's giving you a chance it's because of those 15 years together along with the fact that you have kids. It's the fact that you agreed to get therapy that seems the most promising to her. However this may not be enough to keep her. The other concern is that this Libra may be looking to balance things out aka "settle the score". Libras seek balance and I'm sure this has thrown things out of sync. It could be that she is currently deciding how to handle this situation.click to expand
Posted by ChuckcemPosted by LoveMYlibraaPosted by Chuckcem
The problem is your stance on this whole issue. Most of your post describes how the Libra's actions are affecting you, yet you refrain from detailing how you hurt her in the first place. In reality you only want the Libra back for selfish reasons. Even the way you've described her makes it sound like she is somehow the problem. The best you can do is seek counseling for your issues, but know that for the Libra it is probably over.
Please explain "my stance on the issue"? I might not see what your seeing.
Hopefully your wrong, and Ill be able to salvage this relationship. The way she's behaving lately, it looks like I definitely have a good shot at fixing this. . .
It's the stance that she's being "vicious" and "lashing out". Your particular word choice(s) regarding her doesn't sound very loving. It sounds like you're trying to skirt part of the blame, while not painting a positive picture of the her. The way it reads seems emotionally manipulative as if this situation is somehow out of your hands (as shown in bold below):I've been doing my research on how to win her heart back, and I'm doing everything in my power to change her view of a monster that I am.Meanwhile the details of what you did remain fairly vague. Given the context I'm going to assume that you cheated. Granted there are several ways to cheat (none of them that are good), but knowing this information would help everyone understand your situation. Were you caught sexting/flirting? Did you have sex with another woman? Did you get with a prostitute? What?
In the beginning of the problem she was furious, but stone cold.Told me she was DONE with us and verbally lashed out on everything I ever did that hurt her since the beginning of our relationship so many years ago. She wants a legal separation, and to move away after the holidays, but I'm not willing to let her go. Its been about 6 weeks since I hurt her, and she still is vicious towards me, but were doing baby steps.
Last night got ugly because she cant let go of this hurt and she says she cant help feeling anger, almost hatred towards me.She said she wants revenge and cannot forgive me. She says she doesn't know how to let go of the pain.
Likewise your solutions to win her back (aside from getting therapy) all seem superficial, as if you're trying to buy back her love with purchases and good works. If you cheated on your wife, the last things that are going to win her over are concerts and poems. It will all seem like a hollow gesture.Might be too soon, but I'm trying my best to win her love back. Its been many years of us together in a blissful marriage, we have kids together, and I'm still totally in love with her. I took responsibility, been very apologetic and taken her shopping to concerts, writing her poems and am doing all I can to prove my love, your site has been very helpful but...If she's giving you a chance it's because of those 15 years together along with the fact that you have kids. It's the fact that you agreed to get therapy that seems the most promising to her. However this may not be enough to keep her. The other concern is that this Libra may be looking to balance things out aka "settle the score". Libras seek balance and I'm sure this has thrown things out of sync. It could be that she is currently deciding how to handle this situation.
click to expand
Your right, I see what you mean. She is very sweet, and very loving, but not when I wrote this out. I guess I could've worded it differently .
She actually told me that she's only with me because of our time, and kids, so your absolutely right there too...
I did cheat, even though I didn't have intercourse with the other woman, she feels a huge betrayal, and even asked me how would I feel if the shoe was on the other foot.
*She already mentioned revenge, and I'm just mentally preparing myself for that.
I'm glad you said the therapy is the most promising, but everything else is superficial. I'm taking all the feedback and criticism to heart so that I can save my marriage, so that being said, what else do you think
I should do next besides being there for her? What can I really to to soothe her sweet Libra soul?
I appreciate your reply.
Posted by LoveMYlibraaI would recommend getting a marriage counselor too. Therapy is an awesome route to address your issues, but you'll also want to make sure that she understands that you want her to be involved in the process. She should see that you're willing to do what best for both of you as well. Also don't pester her for answers. Let her work through her feelings, but don't ignore her either. The more you try to force things, the worse they'll become.Posted by ChuckcemPosted by LoveMYlibraaPosted by Chuckcem
The problem is your stance on this whole issue. Most of your post describes how the Libra's actions are affecting you, yet you refrain from detailing how you hurt her in the first place. In reality you only want the Libra back for selfish reasons. Even the way you've described her makes it sound like she is somehow the problem. The best you can do is seek counseling for your issues, but know that for the Libra it is probably over.
Please explain "my stance on the issue"? I might not see what your seeing.
Hopefully your wrong, and Ill be able to salvage this relationship. The way she's behaving lately, it looks like I definitely have a good shot at fixing this. . .
It's the stance that she's being "vicious" and "lashing out". Your particular word choice(s) regarding her doesn't sound very loving. It sounds like you're trying to skirt part of the blame, while not painting a positive picture of the her. The way it reads seems emotionally manipulative as if this situation is somehow out of your hands (as shown in bold below):I've been doing my research on how to win her heart back, and I'm doing everything in my power to change her view of a monster that I am.Meanwhile the details of what you did remain fairly vague. Given the context I'm going to assume that you cheated. Granted there are several ways to cheat (none of them that are good), but knowing this information would help everyone understand your situation. Were you caught sexting/flirting? Did you have sex with another woman? Did you get with a prostitute? What?
In the beginning of the problem she was furious, but stone cold.Told me she was DONE with us and verbally lashed out on everything I ever did that hurt her since the beginning of our relationship so many years ago. She wants a legal separation, and to move away after the holidays, but I'm not willing to let her go. Its been about 6 weeks since I hurt her, and she still is vicious towards me, but were doing baby steps.
Last night got ugly because she cant let go of this hurt and she says she cant help feeling anger, almost hatred towards me.She said she wants revenge and cannot forgive me. She says she doesn't know how to let go of the pain.
Likewise your solutions to win her back (aside from getting therapy) all seem superficial, as if you're trying to buy back her love with purchases and good works. If you cheated on your wife, the last things that are going to win her over are concerts and poems. It will all seem like a hollow gesture.Might be too soon, but I'm trying my best to win her love back. Its been many years of us together in a blissful marriage, we have kids together, and I'm still totally in love with her. I took responsibility, been very apologetic and taken her shopping to concerts, writing her poems and am doing all I can to prove my love, your site has been very helpful but...If she's giving you a chance it's because of those 15 years together along with the fact that you have kids. It's the fact that you agreed to get therapy that seems the most promising to her. However this may not be enough to keep her. The other concern is that this Libra may be looking to balance things out aka "settle the score". Libras seek balance and I'm sure this has thrown things out of sync. It could be that she is currently deciding how to handle this situation.
Your right, I see what you mean. She is very sweet, and very loving, but not when I wrote this out. I guess I could've worded it differently .
She actually told me that she's only with me because of our time, and kids, so your absolutely right there too...
I did cheat, even though I didn't have intercourse with the other woman, she feels a huge betrayal, and even asked me how would I feel if the shoe was on the other foot.
*She already mentioned revenge, and I'm just mentally preparing myself for that.
I'm glad you said the therapy is the most promising, but everything else is superficial. I'm taking all the feedback and criticism to heart so that I can save my marriage, so that being said, what else do you think
I should do next besides being there for her? What can I really to to soothe her sweet Libra soul?
I appreciate your reply.click to expand
I would recommend getting a marriage counselor too. Therapy is an awesome route to address your issues, but you'll also want to make sure that she understands that you want her to be involved in the process. She should see that you're willing to do what best for both of you as well. Also don't pester her for answers. Let her work through her feelings, but don't ignore her either. The more you try to force things, the worse they'll become.
Thanks for this, we went already and thing are a bit better after the therapist called us both out on our BS.
I'm trying my hardest not to smother her, and she's responding well to the space. I'm not trying to force anything with her, even though I do tell her how much I love her, shell respond with, "don't hurt me again!", so I feel that's a positive instead of silence. She's giving me some affection too, only when she wants to, so Im grateful for that...
Thanks again for your reply, I really do want to salvage our relationship, I don't want her to slip through my fingers, so I appreciate any an all feedback.
it seems that you are doing all that you can - give it time
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We've been married over 15 years now, Im a scorpio male, and she's a wonderful lovely Libra female that I recently hurt badly. She feels I betrayed her and our marriage by being somewhat unfaithful.
I've been doing my research on how to win her heart back, and I'm doing everything in my power to change her view of a monster that I am.
In the beginning of the problem she was furious, but stone cold.Told me she was DONE with us and verbally lashed out on everything I ever did that hurt her since the beginning of our relationship so many years ago. She wants a legal separation, and to move away after the holidays, but I'm not willing to let her go. Its been about 6 weeks since I hurt her, and she still is vicious towards me, but were doing baby steps.
Last night got ugly because she cant let go of this hurt and she says she cant help feeling anger, almost hatred towards me.She said she wants revenge and cannot forgive me. She says she doesn't know how to let go of the pain.
Might be too soon, but I'm trying my best to win her love back. Its been many years of us together in a blissful marriage, we have kids together, and I'm still totally in love with her. I took responsibility, been very apologetic and taken her shopping to concerts, writing her poems and am doing all I can to prove my love, your site has been very helpful but...
I'm concerned because I keep reading that when a libra is done, they are DONE.
(she told me this in the beginning of our problem)
I'm going to therapy for sex addiction, been to NA & AA and asked if she's willing to go for US, and she's open to it. . .
Is there hope, or am I holding on for nothing? Should I just let her go? I don't want to.
If I give her too much space, I risk losing her to another, since she has a lot of guy friends and her charming ways comes off as flirty (to me) and im sure them too . I try not to smother her, but its hard to stay away.
What do the Libras think? What can I do? ? ?