Good guys finish last (Page 2)

Posted by blackheart

Posted by idgaf2
i think, in general, i don't believe there are good and bad people. we just do good and bad things.

if referring to a "good" guy, you mean someone who doesn't assert their intentions, ever. even when it falls in their lap.

and by "bad" guy, you mean someone who takes whatever they want, even if they have no claim to it, then perhaps. but i think it's a small minority of each that exist.

if you really want to discuss the topic, i think those terms need to be defined.

It's very difficult to objectively define the terms when they are ultimately subjective. It's like defining an archetype for..let's say a magical wizard.. that could be an old man, with a long beard, in a raggedy robe, holding a wooden staff..but it's not that simple. With this in mind, this is prototypically the image most people will see represents this image (hypothetically speaking). I was trying to make a point in terms of most "good guys", based off anecdotal experience, are not whom they make themselves out to be.

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I like those wizard looking guys,in RPGS they tend to sell the best abilities or scrolls and shit.

Posted by CAPLOCKSAID
I don't understand how self confidence and being assertive pertains to "Bad Guy"

It's not. I'm reflecting upon the "nice guys" who lack those qualities because they hide their true intentions and would be considered the "bad guys" in disguise. If that makes any sense.

From what I know though, guys aren't looking for something simply platonic when they act overtly friendly.

Posted by Palerio

Posted by blackheart

Posted by tiziani

Posted by blackheart

Posted by tiziani
What about the bad guy who doesn't want sex? They never write anything about that dude.

I just made an assumption, that sexual compatibility is one of the first instincts that arise when a man is looking for a partner. The premise doesn't change. If a guys an asshole, doesn't want sex..but a relationship in this case, at least he is being honest in his character. He sets out accept or reject me ultimatum with the woman he approaches. I would still respect him more.

Fair enough. I can't fault that.

I do have something to question about the assumption but I can't find the way to word it simply right now. It's something that's been jarring me for months about " gender roles". Do men really chase sex as much as they say we do or do women roll with that assumption and base their relationships on sex?

It's an eternal headfuck. Maybe its s

after having sex quite a few times..it gets boring and then you may start searching for a deeper connection.

That is the problem for me.

I don't understand why the act of sex should be seen as shallow, when on the contrary it's mostly through sex that people are allowed to reach that deeper connection they're craving - this assuming you're somehow a spiritual person.

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This is a very insightful post. The act of sex shouldn't be seen as shallow. But this is probably why, the foundation of a healthy relationship, will always include great sex. I'm not a marriage counsellor or anything so it's not in my knowledge of expertise (lol).

Sex for one personal can be an intimate/spiritual experience for some people, but moreover a hedonistic sport for others. I used to be the latter.

Posted by Andalusia
I think that whenever there is interest between a male and a female, there's usually an unconscious, unspoken assumption between both parties that the 'interest' is - or should be - sexual in nature. Regardless of whether or not that is actually the case.

So they end up fucking; or attempting to date and then sleeping with each other, at which point the lack of sexual chemistry is felt and one or both parties convinces themselves they were mistaken about the other and their so called connection. When in reality the sexual aspect was never there. Their connection was meant to be mental, or karmatic or growth inducing the entire time.

But since they've had sex, the ego is usually now involved, so they end up just walking away from the lessons or connection they were originally supposed to have. Because:

I'm having a bit of trouble following the last part in terms of the person walking away from a lesson or connection?

Posted by BuffaloBills28
Whether good or bad, the deciding factor on where you finish in life depends on ones willpower... It's all about willpower, don't believe this good guy bad guy crap.

Willpower alone is not a complete solution. Being too persistent makes you seem desperate. Having willpower and knowing when to stop after being rejected is another thing. There are always other woman out there if it doesn't work out the first time.

Posted by Sagithehunter

Posted by blackheart
After having several discussions and people asking me advice on what went wrong in their relationships with woman. I have developed a premise in why good guys finish last. Good guys hide their honest intentions of what they truly desire. Which is ofcourse, usually sex. They will do this by putting the object of their desire onto a pedestal and inhibit showcasing their true qualities (as well as negative qualities) in efforts of "charming" a woman. Women aren't stupid, they have the mechanisms to determine whether someone is being deceptive; they also don't want something that comes off as desperate. The people depicted as "bad guys" are usually men that understand their high self worth and act truly on their intentions. If they want to seduce a chick and say nasty shit to them to bring them home, at least they're being fucking honest. There are too many whiteknights manifesting and complaining about how their "positive actions" should compensate or deserve anything from a woman they've been chasing.

I'm not sure why good guys expect or deserve anything from a woman just by treating them friendly. They want a man who's confident and takes charge while acting in his own honest interest. Would you agree the "good guys" are truly the bad guys in the sense their ingenuine actions should deserve anything?

A reverse interpretation, would you rather hang out with a good girl or a nagging bitch?

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The good girl, ofcourse. Disclaimer: As long as she is being honest with her approach. You always need to search for the right qualities ofcourse, but not everyone is perfect.