I'm so fed up

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DividedWeCapricorn
@EtherealTraveler
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So long story short: Joined Toastmasters (public speaking group), dissed a girl a little too much and was being hard on her speech, got a warning from a teacher, today I'm kicked out of Toastmasters officially from THE SAME TEACHER because apparently writing down notes for evulating a speaker on stage is considered disrespectful.

In her defense there was a period of time afterwards that allows us to evulate and its mandatory, but her logic makes no sense. If writing notes while someone is speaking is disrespectful, should I not write notes on what my teacher is saying now because she keeps talking?

I just had enough of this. What's her beef towards me? My fellow Chinese classmates told me there's a weird vibe with her and she always seem to shoot us with dirty looks whenever us Chinese people are goofing around as if she's racist, and now I'm kicked out?

😠😠😠
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LadyNeptune
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You gotta learn the fine art of criticism as opposed to being perceived as mean spirited.

I've learned that harsh critique is better taken if you leave them with some words of encouragement at the end.

Example: I found your speech disconnected and all over the place. I had a hard time following your logic. However I enjoyed your energy and I think with a little more thought put into your subject matter it would be fully engaging to us listeners.
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LittleFairy
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Posted by LadyNeptune
You gotta learn the fine art of criticism as opposed to being perceived as mean spirited.

I've learned that harsh critique is better taken if you leave them with some words of encouragement at the end.

Example: I found your speech disconnected and all over the place. I had a hard time following your logic. However I enjoyed your energy and I think with a little more thought put into your subject matter it would be fully engaging to us listeners.
She is correct.

You are being logical but unreasonable in your assertion that writing when it is disruptive is the same and writing when a teacher is talking. You need to give way to the human element and understand the types of people you are with and adapt to them a little.
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Comments: 261 · Posts: 1160 · Topics: 39
Posted by LittleFairy
Posted by LadyNeptune
You gotta learn the fine art of criticism as opposed to being perceived as mean spirited.

I've learned that harsh critique is better taken if you leave them with some words of encouragement at the end.

Example: I found your speech disconnected and all over the place. I had a hard time following your logic. However I enjoyed your energy and I think with a little more thought put into your subject matter it would be fully engaging to us listeners.
She is correct.

You are being logical but unreasonable in your assertion that writing when it is disruptive is the same and writing when a teacher is talking. You need to give way to the human element and understand the types of people you are with and adapt to them a little.
click to expand

How am I being unreasonable? Literally writing while someone is talking doesn't mean I'm disrespectful, nor does it mean I'm a bad person?
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@EtherealTraveler
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Comments: 261 · Posts: 1160 · Topics: 39
Posted by edgelord
Posted by EtherealTraveler
Posted by LittleFairy
Posted by LadyNeptune
You gotta learn the fine art of criticism as opposed to being perceived as mean spirited.

I've learned that harsh critique is better taken if you leave them with some words of encouragement at the end.

Example: I found your speech disconnected and all over the place. I had a hard time following your logic. However I enjoyed your energy and I think with a little more thought put into your subject matter it would be fully engaging to us listeners.
She is correct.

You are being logical but unreasonable in your assertion that writing when it is disruptive is the same and writing when a teacher is talking. You need to give way to the human element and understand the types of people you are with and adapt to them a little.
How am I being unreasonable? Literally writing while someone is talking doesn't mean I'm disrespectful, nor does it mean I'm a bad person?
continue to think you're right and that everyone else is wrong and you're being picked on and completely miss the point of the people trying to help you. that will really get you far.

click to expand

Let me rephrase then. How am I wrong? I have never seen someone telling me that this type of behavior is disrespectful. Judges on TV shows do the same thing. Are they rude now?
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LadyNeptune
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Comments: 11076 · Posts: 35718 · Topics: 110
Posted by EtherealTraveler
Posted by edgelord
Posted by EtherealTraveler
Posted by LittleFairy
Posted by LadyNeptune
You gotta learn the fine art of criticism as opposed to being perceived as mean spirited.

I've learned that harsh critique is better taken if you leave them with some words of encouragement at the end.

Example: I found your speech disconnected and all over the place. I had a hard time following your logic. However I enjoyed your energy and I think with a little more thought put into your subject matter it would be fully engaging to us listeners.
She is correct.

You are being logical but unreasonable in your assertion that writing when it is disruptive is the same and writing when a teacher is talking. You need to give way to the human element and understand the types of people you are with and adapt to them a little.
How am I being unreasonable? Literally writing while someone is talking doesn't mean I'm disrespectful, nor does it mean I'm a bad person?
continue to think you're right and that everyone else is wrong and you're being picked on and completely miss the point of the people trying to help you. that will really get you far.


Let me rephrase then. How am I wrong? I have never seen someone telling me that this type of behavior is disrespectful. Judges on TV shows do the same thing. Are they rude now?
click to expand

I bet it has nothing to do with you writing. I bet the chick was butt hurt and bitched to the teacher who then felt compelled to expel you from the group.

Contact the organization itself, let them know which chapter you were involved with and tell them you felt discriminated against because of your ethnicity by the instructor.
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DividedWeCapricorn
@EtherealTraveler
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Comments: 261 · Posts: 1160 · Topics: 39
Posted by LadyNeptune
Posted by EtherealTraveler
Posted by edgelord
Posted by EtherealTraveler
Posted by LittleFairy
Posted by LadyNeptune
You gotta learn the fine art of criticism as opposed to being perceived as mean spirited.

I've learned that harsh critique is better taken if you leave them with some words of encouragement at the end.

Example: I found your speech disconnected and all over the place. I had a hard time following your logic. However I enjoyed your energy and I think with a little more thought put into your subject matter it would be fully engaging to us listeners.
She is correct.

You are being logical but unreasonable in your assertion that writing when it is disruptive is the same and writing when a teacher is talking. You need to give way to the human element and understand the types of people you are with and adapt to them a little.
How am I being unreasonable? Literally writing while someone is talking doesn't mean I'm disrespectful, nor does it mean I'm a bad person?
continue to think you're right and that everyone else is wrong and you're being picked on and completely miss the point of the people trying to help you. that will really get you far.


Let me rephrase then. How am I wrong? I have never seen someone telling me that this type of behavior is disrespectful. Judges on TV shows do the same thing. Are they rude now?
I bet it has nothing to do with you writing. I bet the chick was butt hurt and bitched to the teacher who then felt compelled to expel you from the group.

Contact the organization itself, let them know which chapter you were involved with and tell them you felt discriminated against because of your ethnicity by the instructor.
click to expand

Are you sure turning this into a hate crime will help? I dunno I mean the last place I can go to is the headmaster which organized this whole thing. Said teacher agreed to give me another chance but from what happened today I bet she's itching to get me outta there.

I don't mind the drama. I mind the consequences.
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Parkourler
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Comments: 512 · Posts: 2343 · Topics: 199
Posted by EtherealTraveler
Posted by LadyNeptune
Posted by EtherealTraveler
Posted by edgelord
Posted by EtherealTraveler
Posted by LittleFairy
Posted by LadyNeptune
You gotta learn the fine art of criticism as opposed to being perceived as mean spirited.

I've learned that harsh critique is better taken if you leave them with some words of encouragement at the end.

Example: I found your speech disconnected and all over the place. I had a hard time following your logic. However I enjoyed your energy and I think with a little more thought put into your subject matter it would be fully engaging to us listeners.
She is correct.

You are being logical but unreasonable in your assertion that writing when it is disruptive is the same and writing when a teacher is talking. You need to give way to the human element and understand the types of people you are with and adapt to them a little.
How am I being unreasonable? Literally writing while someone is talking doesn't mean I'm disrespectful, nor does it mean I'm a bad person?
continue to think you're right and that everyone else is wrong and you're being picked on and completely miss the point of the people trying to help you. that will really get you far.


Let me rephrase then. How am I wrong? I have never seen someone telling me that this type of behavior is disrespectful. Judges on TV shows do the same thing. Are they rude now?
I bet it has nothing to do with you writing. I bet the chick was butt hurt and bitched to the teacher who then felt compelled to expel you from the group.

Contact the organization itself, let them know which chapter you were involved with and tell them you felt discriminated against because of your ethnicity by the instructor.
Are you sure turning this into a hate crime will help? I dunno I mean the last place I can go to is the headmaster which organized this whole thing. Said teacher agreed to give me another chance but from what happened today I bet she's itching to get me outta there.

I don't mind the drama. I mind the consequences.
click to expand



https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Defamation
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DividedWeCapricorn
@EtherealTraveler
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Comments: 261 · Posts: 1160 · Topics: 39
Posted by Parkourler
Posted by EtherealTraveler
Posted by LadyNeptune
Posted by EtherealTraveler
Posted by edgelord
Posted by EtherealTraveler
Posted by LittleFairy
Posted by LadyNeptune
You gotta learn the fine art of criticism as opposed to being perceived as mean spirited.

I've learned that harsh critique is better taken if you leave them with some words of encouragement at the end.

Example: I found your speech disconnected and all over the place. I had a hard time following your logic. However I enjoyed your energy and I think with a little more thought put into your subject matter it would be fully engaging to us listeners.
She is correct.

You are being logical but unreasonable in your assertion that writing when it is disruptive is the same and writing when a teacher is talking. You need to give way to the human element and understand the types of people you are with and adapt to them a little.
How am I being unreasonable? Literally writing while someone is talking doesn't mean I'm disrespectful, nor does it mean I'm a bad person?
continue to think you're right and that everyone else is wrong and you're being picked on and completely miss the point of the people trying to help you. that will really get you far.


Let me rephrase then. How am I wrong? I have never seen someone telling me that this type of behavior is disrespectful. Judges on TV shows do the same thing. Are they rude now?
I bet it has nothing to do with you writing. I bet the chick was butt hurt and bitched to the teacher who then felt compelled to expel you from the group.

Contact the organization itself, let them know which chapter you were involved with and tell them you felt discriminated against because of your ethnicity by the instructor.
Are you sure turning this into a hate crime will help? I dunno I mean the last place I can go to is the headmaster which organized this whole thing. Said teacher agreed to give me another chance but from what happened today I bet she's itching to get me outta there.

I don't mind the drama. I mind the consequences.


https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Defamation
click to expand

Is this defamation now >.> Seems a little too severe.
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LadyNeptune
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Comments: 11076 · Posts: 35718 · Topics: 110
Posted by EtherealTraveler
Posted by LadyNeptune
Posted by EtherealTraveler
Posted by edgelord
Posted by EtherealTraveler
Posted by LittleFairy
Posted by LadyNeptune
You gotta learn the fine art of criticism as opposed to being perceived as mean spirited.

I've learned that harsh critique is better taken if you leave them with some words of encouragement at the end.

Example: I found your speech disconnected and all over the place. I had a hard time following your logic. However I enjoyed your energy and I think with a little more thought put into your subject matter it would be fully engaging to us listeners.
She is correct.

You are being logical but unreasonable in your assertion that writing when it is disruptive is the same and writing when a teacher is talking. You need to give way to the human element and understand the types of people you are with and adapt to them a little.
How am I being unreasonable? Literally writing while someone is talking doesn't mean I'm disrespectful, nor does it mean I'm a bad person?
continue to think you're right and that everyone else is wrong and you're being picked on and completely miss the point of the people trying to help you. that will really get you far.


Let me rephrase then. How am I wrong? I have never seen someone telling me that this type of behavior is disrespectful. Judges on TV shows do the same thing. Are they rude now?
I bet it has nothing to do with you writing. I bet the chick was butt hurt and bitched to the teacher who then felt compelled to expel you from the group.

Contact the organization itself, let them know which chapter you were involved with and tell them you felt discriminated against because of your ethnicity by the instructor.
Are you sure turning this into a hate crime will help? I dunno I mean the last place I can go to is the headmaster which organized this whole thing. Said teacher agreed to give me another chance but from what happened today I bet she's itching to get me outta there.

I don't mind the drama. I mind the consequences.
I mean you said you and your friend felt discriminated against by the teacher....

Posted by EtherealTraveler
My fellow Chinese classmates told me there's a weird vibe with her and she always seem to shoot us with dirty looks whenever us Chinese people are goofing around as if she's racist, and now I'm kicked out?

😠😠😠
click to expand

But if she's letting you back into the class then let it be. See how things go.
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Eleventh
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If you want my advice don't side with your fellow Chinese class mates, you all go to the same school and live in the same country. Making tribes divides you and creates a them versus us attitude and you will start to believe you are being targeted by people who challenge or impose their authority on to you.

Ok maybe you are being targeted because you all have created a tribe and therefore you put a big bulls eye on your heads....It's smarter to break away and intergrate into school and make new friends other than just your Chinese friends and then you won't have the racial issue...

I think what your teacher failed to explain to you is that writing notes when someone is speaking doesn't show that you are listening and therefore you're missing the point of the exercise......How are you able to critique someone if you haven't listened to everything they have said?....had you given her notes without knowing the whole story you probably would have embarrassed yourself so I guess your teacher just saved you the trouble

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DividedWeCapricorn
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Comments: 261 · Posts: 1160 · Topics: 39
Posted by LadyNeptune
Posted by EtherealTraveler
Posted by LadyNeptune
Posted by EtherealTraveler
Posted by edgelord
Posted by EtherealTraveler
Posted by LittleFairy
Posted by LadyNeptune
You gotta learn the fine art of criticism as opposed to being perceived as mean spirited.

I've learned that harsh critique is better taken if you leave them with some words of encouragement at the end.

Example: I found your speech disconnected and all over the place. I had a hard time following your logic. However I enjoyed your energy and I think with a little more thought put into your subject matter it would be fully engaging to us listeners.
She is correct.

You are being logical but unreasonable in your assertion that writing when it is disruptive is the same and writing when a teacher is talking. You need to give way to the human element and understand the types of people you are with and adapt to them a little.
How am I being unreasonable? Literally writing while someone is talking doesn't mean I'm disrespectful, nor does it mean I'm a bad person?
continue to think you're right and that everyone else is wrong and you're being picked on and completely miss the point of the people trying to help you. that will really get you far.


Let me rephrase then. How am I wrong? I have never seen someone telling me that this type of behavior is disrespectful. Judges on TV shows do the same thing. Are they rude now?
I bet it has nothing to do with you writing. I bet the chick was butt hurt and bitched to the teacher who then felt compelled to expel you from the group.

Contact the organization itself, let them know which chapter you were involved with and tell them you felt discriminated against because of your ethnicity by the instructor.
Are you sure turning this into a hate crime will help? I dunno I mean the last place I can go to is the headmaster which organized this whole thing. Said teacher agreed to give me another chance but from what happened today I bet she's itching to get me outta there.

I don't mind the drama. I mind the consequences.
I mean you said you and your friend felt discriminated against by the teacher....

Posted by EtherealTraveler
My fellow Chinese classmates told me there's a weird vibe with her and she always seem to shoot us with dirty looks whenever us Chinese people are goofing around as if she's racist, and now I'm kicked out?

😠😠😠
But if she's letting you back into the class then let it be. See how things go.
click to expand

Twas a gut feeling but yes. Let's see how it goes.
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DividedWeCapricorn
@EtherealTraveler
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Comments: 261 · Posts: 1160 · Topics: 39
Posted by The_eleventh_sign_11
If you want my advice don't side with your fellow Chinese class mates, you all go to the same school and live in the same country. Making tribes divides you and creates a them versus us attitude and you will start to believe you are being targeted by people who challenge or impose their authority on to you.

Ok maybe you are being targeted because you all have created a tribe and therefore you put a big bulls eye on your heads....It's smarter to break away and intergrate into school and make new friends other than just your Chinese friends and then you won't have the racial issue...

I think what your teacher failed to explain to you is that writing notes when someone is speaking doesn't show that you are listening and therefore you're missing the point of the exercise......How are you able to critique someone if you haven't listened to everything they have said?....had you given her notes without knowing the whole story you probably would have embarrassed yourself so I guess your teacher just saved you the trouble


But then as I am writing down notes, it shows that I'm actively learning? Sure I might miss minor details here and there, but it's better then if I do it in the end with half the story forgotten (short attention spans). It's how I see it.
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LadyNeptune
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Comments: 11076 · Posts: 35718 · Topics: 110
Posted by EtherealTraveler
Posted by LadyNeptune
Posted by EtherealTraveler
Posted by LadyNeptune
Posted by EtherealTraveler
Posted by edgelord
Posted by EtherealTraveler
Posted by LittleFairy
Posted by LadyNeptune
You gotta learn the fine art of criticism as opposed to being perceived as mean spirited.

I've learned that harsh critique is better taken if you leave them with some words of encouragement at the end.

Example: I found your speech disconnected and all over the place. I had a hard time following your logic. However I enjoyed your energy and I think with a little more thought put into your subject matter it would be fully engaging to us listeners.
She is correct.

You are being logical but unreasonable in your assertion that writing when it is disruptive is the same and writing when a teacher is talking. You need to give way to the human element and understand the types of people you are with and adapt to them a little.
How am I being unreasonable? Literally writing while someone is talking doesn't mean I'm disrespectful, nor does it mean I'm a bad person?
continue to think you're right and that everyone else is wrong and you're being picked on and completely miss the point of the people trying to help you. that will really get you far.


Let me rephrase then. How am I wrong? I have never seen someone telling me that this type of behavior is disrespectful. Judges on TV shows do the same thing. Are they rude now?
I bet it has nothing to do with you writing. I bet the chick was butt hurt and bitched to the teacher who then felt compelled to expel you from the group.

Contact the organization itself, let them know which chapter you were involved with and tell them you felt discriminated against because of your ethnicity by the instructor.
Are you sure turning this into a hate crime will help? I dunno I mean the last place I can go to is the headmaster which organized this whole thing. Said teacher agreed to give me another chance but from what happened today I bet she's itching to get me outta there.

I don't mind the drama. I mind the consequences.
I mean you said you and your friend felt discriminated against by the teacher....

Posted by EtherealTraveler
My fellow Chinese classmates told me there's a weird vibe with her and she always seem to shoot us with dirty looks whenever us Chinese people are goofing around as if she's racist, and now I'm kicked out?

😠😠😠
But if she's letting you back into the class then let it be. See how things go.
Twas a gut feeling but yes. Let's see how it goes.
click to expand

If I'm you I'd pull her aside after class and clear the air. Tell her you never meant to be disrespectful or rude and if you came off that way it was not your intention. She'll appreciate the gesture and you can both start over.
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DividedWeCapricorn
@EtherealTraveler
8 Years1,000+ PostsCapricorn

Comments: 261 · Posts: 1160 · Topics: 39
Posted by LadyNeptune
Posted by EtherealTraveler
Posted by LadyNeptune
Posted by EtherealTraveler
Posted by LadyNeptune
Posted by EtherealTraveler
Posted by edgelord
Posted by EtherealTraveler
Posted by LittleFairy
Posted by LadyNeptune
You gotta learn the fine art of criticism as opposed to being perceived as mean spirited.

I've learned that harsh critique is better taken if you leave them with some words of encouragement at the end.

Example: I found your speech disconnected and all over the place. I had a hard time following your logic. However I enjoyed your energy and I think with a little more thought put into your subject matter it would be fully engaging to us listeners.
She is correct.

You are being logical but unreasonable in your assertion that writing when it is disruptive is the same and writing when a teacher is talking. You need to give way to the human element and understand the types of people you are with and adapt to them a little.
How am I being unreasonable? Literally writing while someone is talking doesn't mean I'm disrespectful, nor does it mean I'm a bad person?
continue to think you're right and that everyone else is wrong and you're being picked on and completely miss the point of the people trying to help you. that will really get you far.


Let me rephrase then. How am I wrong? I have never seen someone telling me that this type of behavior is disrespectful. Judges on TV shows do the same thing. Are they rude now?
I bet it has nothing to do with you writing. I bet the chick was butt hurt and bitched to the teacher who then felt compelled to expel you from the group.

Contact the organization itself, let them know which chapter you were involved with and tell them you felt discriminated against because of your ethnicity by the instructor.
Are you sure turning this into a hate crime will help? I dunno I mean the last place I can go to is the headmaster which organized this whole thing. Said teacher agreed to give me another chance but from what happened today I bet she's itching to get me outta there.

I don't mind the drama. I mind the consequences.
I mean you said you and your friend felt discriminated against by the teacher....

Posted by EtherealTraveler
My fellow Chinese classmates told me there's a weird vibe with her and she always seem to shoot us with dirty looks whenever us Chinese people are goofing around as if she's racist, and now I'm kicked out?

😠😠😠
But if she's letting you back into the class then let it be. See how things go.
Twas a gut feeling but yes. Let's see how it goes.
If I'm you I'd pull her aside after class and clear the air. Tell her you never meant to be disrespectful or rude and if you came off that way it was not your intention. She'll appreciate the gesture and you can both start over.
click to expand

Did that once when I dissed a girl. She said last chance. I don't think it's gonna work out this time.

Me being completely stubborn about it didn't help either. Because up to this point I still think I'm right with the taking notes while someone's speaking thing.