Ladies is it wise? (Page 2)

On both Man and woman, is very unattractive to do nothing. Someone are guilty as well.

Posted by bkbella86

Posted by PhoenixRising
Wow, 5 years is a long time to spend on anyone not doing anything with themselves. I truly can't think of any reasonable reason other than illness (either the person directly or caring for an ill person) would excuse that.

That's what I'm saying...but my friends are ok with just having a bf...it seems. It's literally been 7 or 8 tho since they met in 05 06. On top of all their other issues this is the biggest one...she fought tooth and nail to get this bum to commit and she feels like she got a prize.

One of my friends snidely remarked you know bkbella and her standards. As if these aren't basic standards to dating.

click to expand

My friends say the same thing bk.... my standards are too high.... all I ask is that he's hung like two Coke cans, makes a cool mill a year and has a clean record....

Oh, and he's needs to be > 6'4.

Too much?

Posted by GemsRaGalsBestPal

Posted by bkbella86

Posted by Arietteheart
The Libra I briefly dated had a great job, I know he had money...and yet, his ass was still living in someone's basement...sleeping on a box spring/ no bed frame, I don't even. That was a cool trick he pulled -_-

He held 2 and 3 jobs, paid for everything...took me back to his house and his bed is next to the washer and dryer.

I guess I'm saying, I'll take someone with not a lot but potential and goal oriented over someone with money who is irresponsible and no direction.

just because his living conditions were less than stellar that doesn't mean he lacks direction and is or irresponsible. If you say he had "jobs" then he isn't lacking direction IMO.

Yeah, sure, there's all that poetry and bright eyed and bushy tailed business.... but then again nothing says lovin' like a mattress on the floor next to the cockroach droppings and the soft sweet hum of the spin cycle.

click to expand

dead

Posted by GemsRaGalsBestPal

Posted by bkbella86

Posted by PhoenixRising
Wow, 5 years is a long time to spend on anyone not doing anything with themselves. I truly can't think of any reasonable reason other than illness (either the person directly or caring for an ill person) would excuse that.

That's what I'm saying...but my friends are ok with just having a bf...it seems. It's literally been 7 or 8 tho since they met in 05 06. On top of all their other issues this is the biggest one...she fought tooth and nail to get this bum to commit and she feels like she got a prize.

One of my friends snidely remarked you know bkbella and her standards. As if these aren't basic standards to dating.

My friends say the same thing bk.... my standards are too high.... all I ask is that he's hung like two Coke cans, makes a cool mill a year and has a clean record....

Oh, and he's needs to be > 6'4.

Too much?

click to expand

Question? Please don't take it the wrong way. Are you a successful woman? It can be any where from owning your own business; to corporate, doesn't matter. Financially, can you stand on your own two feet without help?

Posted by bkbella86

Posted by PhoenixRising
Wow, 5 years is a long time to spend on anyone not doing anything with themselves. I truly can't think of any reasonable reason other than illness (either the person directly or caring for an ill person) would excuse that.

That's what I'm saying...but my friends are ok with just having a bf...it seems. It's literally been 7 or 8 tho since they met in 05 06. On top of all their other issues this is the biggest one...she fought tooth and nail to get this bum to commit and she feels like she got a prize.

One of my friends snidely remarked you know bkbella and her standards. As if these aren't basic standards to dating.

click to expand

im sorry, what did she win? What prize is he. She is the prize!

Posted by GemsRaGalsBestPal

Posted by bkbella86

Posted by PhoenixRising
Wow, 5 years is a long time to spend on anyone not doing anything with themselves. I truly can't think of any reasonable reason other than illness (either the person directly or caring for an ill person) would excuse that.

That's what I'm saying...but my friends are ok with just having a bf...it seems. It's literally been 7 or 8 tho since they met in 05 06. On top of all their other issues this is the biggest one...she fought tooth and nail to get this bum to commit and she feels like she got a prize.

One of my friends snidely remarked you know bkbella and her standards. As if these aren't basic standards to dating.

My friends say the same thing bk.... my standards are too high.... all I ask is that he's hung like two Coke cans, makes a cool mill a year and has a clean record....

Oh, and he's needs to be > 6'4.

Too much?

click to expand

lmao....not the fuck at all..especially when I see women getting those kinds of guys...well maybe not a millionaire but...he aint broke...

are you gemcandle? ive been mia but sounds like gemc

Posted by PhoenixRising

Posted by bkbella86

Posted by PhoenixRising
Wow, 5 years is a long time to spend on anyone not doing anything with themselves. I truly can't think of any reasonable reason other than illness (either the person directly or caring for an ill person) would excuse that.

That's what I'm saying...but my friends are ok with just having a bf...it seems. It's literally been 7 or 8 tho since they met in 05 06. On top of all their other issues this is the biggest one...she fought tooth and nail to get this bum to commit and she feels like she got a prize.

One of my friends snidely remarked you know bkbella and her standards. As if these aren't basic standards to dating.

Well, I'm not necessarily gonna challenge someone that is "simply" in a common-law relationship. Marriage is not for everyone, so I pass no judgement regardless of my personal preference/feeling on the matter. I have a friend that has been with her man for 14 years and they have a son, working towards owning their home, which he bought from working very hard, they are great parents, but they just don't want to do the marriage thing.

However, fighting a man tooth and nail to simply commit *smh*, she's letting life pass her by and when she's in her late 30s-40s, then what? Keep your standards bk. They are basically telling you to settle because they have. Idk. Sounds like they fear the idea of being alone. Sad thing is, when this eventually simmers down and they split because what he's willing to do isn't enough, that's exactly where they will ultimately be.

click to expand

exactly. They want you too settle like they did because the more people who settle, makes it okay and makes your friend feel more comfortable.

Posted by bkbella86

Posted by PhoenixRising
Wow, 5 years is a long time to spend on anyone not doing anything with themselves. I truly can't think of any reasonable reason other than illness (either the person directly or caring for an ill person) would excuse that.

That's what I'm saying...but my friends are ok with just having a bf...it seems. It's literally been 7 or 8 tho since they met in 05 06. On top of all their other issues this is the biggest one...she fought tooth and nail to get this bum to commit and she feels like she got a prize.

One of my friends snidely remarked you know bkbella and her standards. As if these aren't basic standards to dating.

click to expand

Well, I'm not necessarily gonna challenge someone that is "simply" in a common-law relationship. Marriage is not for everyone, so I pass no judgement regardless of my personal preference/feeling on the matter. I have a friend that has been with her man for 14 years and they have a son, working towards owning their home, which he bought from working very hard, they are great parents, but they just don't want to do the marriage thing.

However, fighting a man tooth and nail to simply commit *smh*, she's letting life pass her by and when she's in her late 30s-40s, then what? Keep your standards bk. They are basically telling you to settle because they have. Idk. Sounds like they fear the idea of being alone. Sad thing is, when this eventually simmers down and they split because what these men are willing to do isn't enough, that's exactly where they will ultimately be.

Posted by PhoenixRising

Posted by bkbella86

Posted by PhoenixRising
Wow, 5 years is a long time to spend on anyone not doing anything with themselves. I truly can't think of any reasonable reason other than illness (either the person directly or caring for an ill person) would excuse that.

That's what I'm saying...but my friends are ok with just having a bf...it seems. It's literally been 7 or 8 tho since they met in 05 06. On top of all their other issues this is the biggest one...she fought tooth and nail to get this bum to commit and she feels like she got a prize.

One of my friends snidely remarked you know bkbella and her standards. As if these aren't basic standards to dating.

Well, I'm not necessarily gonna challenge someone that is "simply" in a common-law relationship. Marriage is not for everyone, so I pass no judgement regardless of my personal preference/feeling on the matter. I have a friend that has been with her man for 14 years and they have a son, working towards owning their home, which he bought from working very hard, they are great parents, but they just don't want to do the marriage thing.

However, fighting a man tooth and nail to simply commit *smh*, she's letting life pass her by and when she's in her late 30s-40s, then what? Keep your standards bk. They are basically telling you to settle because they have. Idk. Sounds like they fear the idea of being alone. Sad thing is, when this eventually simmers down and they split because what he's willing to do isn't enough, that's exactly where they will ultimately be.

click to expand

no its not about the marriage thing at all...hell im not even sure I wanna get married. But she was "dating" this guy I say that loosely because he had a gf for years and then she dumped him and he got with my friend. Imean she wasted almost all her twenties with this bum...my other friend too..shes been with her bum for longer...since hs...17 were all 27 now. smh

That bum is all she knows. Too scared to see wats out there. That bum probably guilt trips her daily, and don't wanna lose his meal ticket.

Posted by DMV
That bum is all she knows. Too scared to see wats out there. That bum probably guilt trips her daily, and don't wanna lose his meal ticket.

+1

Which is messed up if that's added to the situation which is already F'd up as it is.

Posted by Sagittarius2315

Posted by GemsRaGalsBestPal

Posted by bkbella86

Posted by PhoenixRising
Wow, 5 years is a long time to spend on anyone not doing anything with themselves. I truly can't think of any reasonable reason other than illness (either the person directly or caring for an ill person) would excuse that.

That's what I'm saying...but my friends are ok with just having a bf...it seems. It's literally been 7 or 8 tho since they met in 05 06. On top of all their other issues this is the biggest one...she fought tooth and nail to get this bum to commit and she feels like she got a prize.

One of my friends snidely remarked you know bkbella and her standards. As if these aren't basic standards to dating.

My friends say the same thing bk.... my standards are too high.... all I ask is that he's hung like two Coke cans, makes a cool mill a year and has a clean record....

Oh, and he's needs to be > 6'4.

Too much?

Question? Please don't take it the wrong way. Are you a successful woman? It can be any where from owning your own business; to corporate, doesn't matter. Financially, can you stand on your own two feet without help?

click to expand

yes mam...been on my own now for three years. and even before that i always held a job or two or three and school. Now I dont have my degree yet and havent really gotten into my career but I am self sufficient and I will be dabbling in what I want to do into the new year.

Posted by Sagittarius2315

Posted by GemsRaGalsBestPal

Posted by bkbella86

Posted by PhoenixRising
Wow, 5 years is a long time to spend on anyone not doing anything with themselves. I truly can't think of any reasonable reason other than illness (either the person directly or caring for an ill person) would excuse that.

That's what I'm saying...but my friends are ok with just having a bf...it seems. It's literally been 7 or 8 tho since they met in 05 06. On top of all their other issues this is the biggest one...she fought tooth and nail to get this bum to commit and she feels like she got a prize.

One of my friends snidely remarked you know bkbella and her standards. As if these aren't basic standards to dating.

My friends say the same thing bk.... my standards are too high.... all I ask is that he's hung like two Coke cans, makes a cool mill a year and has a clean record....

Oh, and he's needs to be > 6'4.

Too much?

Question? Please don't take it the wrong way. Are you a successful woman? It can be any where from owning your own business; to corporate, doesn't matter. Financially, can you stand on your own two feet without help?

click to expand

and that has been with no help...momma hasnt paid my rent not once.

Posted by bkbella86
are you gemcandle? ive been mia but sounds like gemc

That wasn't a very nice thing to say.

😛

Posted by Montgomery

Posted by bkbella86
are you gemcandle? ive been mia but sounds like gemc

That wasn't a very nice thing to say.

😛

click to expand

lol y come? thats my girl she makes me laugh

To "kill" two birds with one stone....

1. Yes, I'm successful. My career has been discussed before quite a few times on these boards. If you want to know more I'd be happy to expand, but it's kind of moot for your question at this time. You also need to understand the Gem sun / Aries moon to "get" my humor most of the time.

2. Me? Gem-Candle? Lol! That's actually pretty funny to anyone who's been around the boards for a bit. (Not meant condescending)

Backstory: There was mad drama a couple years back when she stole my photo and made a dummy account of me.... posted a bunch of obscene shit. It was all in jest until she went too far. I took a dxpizzles break after for a bit and apparently she got drug over shards of glass for a good time over it. It's all in the past, but that's why it's funny you'd ask me if I was her. Also, I predate her on dxpizzles, only one profile ever, all posts ever made - visible.

Posted by bkbella86


no its not about the marriage thing at all...hell im not even sure I wanna get married. But she was "dating" this guy I say that loosely because he had a gf for years and then she dumped him and he got with my friend. Imean she wasted almost all her twenties with this bum...my other friend too..shes been with her bum for longer...since hs...17 were all 27 now. smh

Noooooo. She spent a decade on another girl's man? Well, we all learn in our own ways I suppose....

The reason why I asked is because usually successful people want like mind and successful man or woman in their life. Which isn't bad; and I understand it. When you have your own; you set your standards higher. 100/100, instead of 50/50. 100/100 meaning financially you can hold your own, and have it together financially, 50/50 meaning you are both on the works of getting that financial stability you want.
100/0 or 50/0 just doesn't work.

That's the reasons why I asked_??_

Posted by GemsRaGalsBestPal
To "kill" two birds with one stone....

1. Yes, I'm successful. My career has been discussed before quite a few times on these boards. If you want to know more I'd be happy to expand, but it's kind of moot for your question at this time. You also need to understand the Gem sun / Aries moon to "get" my humor most of the time.

2. Me? Gem-Candle? Lol! That's actually pretty funny to anyone who's been around the boards for a bit. (Not meant condescending)

Backstory: There was mad drama a couple years back when she stole my photo and made a dummy account of me.... posted a bunch of obscene shit. It was all in jest until she went too far. I took a dxpizzles break after for a bit and apparently she got drug over shards of glass for a good time over it. It's all in the past, but that's why it's funny you'd ask me if I was her. Also, I predate her on dxpizzles, only one profile ever, all posts ever made - visible.

wow dxp, wow

Posted by size zero superhero

Posted by DMV
Men always yelling about how they should be treated like a king, bitch act like it then.

Thank you.

Some men feel entitled to the Royal Treatment w/no strings attached, without asking twice.
Having been raised by mothers who tirelessly catered to husbands' every need & demand, imposed strict curfews & disciplinary policy on their sister(s)while the boys of the house had free-range. After causing trouble, Jr. got off the hook on principle("boys will be boys")meanwhile, they witness young girls getting additional sentences for committing transgressions they were given a pass on.

As adults with high self-esteem and low merit, coddled sons are indignant because his female peers hold him to a standard. Many women whom he's attracted overlook him for the sole reason that he isn't doing the minimum, yet expects the most in return.

click to expand

omg they want the world in return. They wanna be the leader and tell u what to do and they feellike theye doing u a favor by choosin u. Bitch please. Your a prostitute. You think spending time and dick slinging will sastisfy your ol lady.

Funny thing is, with girls like BK's friends, theyre right.

Posted by bkbella86
To date a man when your in your late twenties almost thirty who isnt established or on his way to being established? And what i mean by established is, own apt , own income, and maybe a car depending on the state in question? those are just the necessities mind you.


Would you? and seriously think about building a family with this man?

I don't care about owning an apartment or a car.

I do care if he ever worked in his life. If it's just a transition between jobs or he went back to school, I would date him.

^I'm 25, forgot to add that

Well Saggy, that makes perfect sense to me.... and my vag is like a high school hallway so I gotta shop big, ya know what I mean?

Posted by Damnata

Posted by bkbella86
To date a man when your in your late twenties almost thirty who isnt established or on his way to being established? And what i mean by established is, own apt , own income, and maybe a car depending on the state in question? those are just the necessities mind you.


Would you? and seriously think about building a family with this man?

I don't care about owning an apartment or a car.

I do care if he ever worked in his life. If it's just a transition between jobs or he went back to school, I would date him.

click to expand

No, she means he has a roof over his head. Can support himself. Not literally own a apt.

shit, I rent lol

Oh, ok then.

I know women who won't consider a guy if he doesn't have his own house by 25 around here so yeah.

I get turned off when a man doesn't have his life in order. And by in order I mean, he must have a job & a place to live (not with parents though if he is not a teenager). I don't care if he doesn't have a car or too much money, but he must be able to pay his own way in life.

I have a leo friend that dates ONLY well established men. Guys with expensive cars, clothes, etc, but it never lasts because all these men have numerous fish to fry, aka..other women. So..
Anyway, so one day she decided to try a normal guy & I was with her when the guy came to her house for the first time. She has a ten-year-old son & the boy is crazy about cars. His own father has several. As soon as the guy came into the house, the little boy went outside to check what car his mom's new boyfriend is driving. He returned & said "Yho! He doesn't even have a car!". LOL! My friend was embarrassed. I thought it was hilarious.

Their relationship went on for four years until she found out he was cheating with someone he told her was his sister. She had no way of knowing if it was his real sister or not because we don't introduce boyfriends & girlfriends to our families in our culture, especially to the parents. It really broke her heart.

What about the women that "create" their own men? The Betty Brodericks of this world who work multiple jobs to send their men to school so they could be successful.

That's one thing I think I'm not built to do, support a man financially. I'd rather be alone. Worst of all, in most of these situations, the man seems to develop amnesia the moment he makes it to the top & drops the woman like a pile of dirty laundry. Ooh, I'd kill him too 😛

Posted by TMV

Posted by bkbella86
my friends disagree with me greatly and think that love is all you need.

Last I checked love doesn't pay the rent, put food on the table, or provide a retirement nest egg.

click to expand

I was losing hope for this thread, so thank you my thoughts exactly.

Posted by WaterCup
What about the women that "create" their own men? The Betty Brodericks of this world who work multiple jobs to send their men to school so they could be successful.

That's one thing I think I'm not built to do, support a man financially. I'd rather be alone. Worst of all, in most of these situations, the man seems to develop amnesia the moment he makes it to the top & drops the woman like a pile of dirty laundry. Ooh, I'd kill him too 😛

Exactly!! 😛

Posted by thescepter
i just saw hitchcock. i think it was anthony hopkins under all that make up. his wife was a huge influence for his success.

ang lee was supported by his wife too or something until he made cider house rules.

hitch wasn't dependent tho. he was already 60 and making psycho in the bipoic.

don't date a director ladies! 😛

I love talented creative minds! But with those professions comes little money tillyou make it big. Authors, painters, musicians, actors

Posted by WaterCup
What about the women that "create" their own men? The Betty Brodericks of this world who work multiple jobs to send their men to school so they could be successful.

That's one thing I think I'm not built to do, support a man financially. I'd rather be alone. Worst of all, in most of these situations, the man seems to develop amnesia the moment he makes it to the top & drops the woman like a pile of dirty laundry. Ooh, I'd kill him too 😛

I ghink my mars in virgo makes me a bit like betty brodericks. If see potential and return, I would fund his dream but this is few far Nd between.

Posted by GemsRaGalsBestPal
To "kill" two birds with one stone....

1. Yes, I'm successful. My career has been discussed before quite a few times on these boards. If you want to know more I'd be happy to expand, but it's kind of moot for your question at this time. You also need to understand the Gem sun / Aries moon to "get" my humor most of the time.

2. Me? Gem-Candle? Lol! That's actually pretty funny to anyone who's been around the boards for a bit. (Not meant condescending)

Backstory: There was mad drama a couple years back when she stole my photo and made a dummy account of me.... posted a bunch of obscene shit. It was all in jest until she went too far. I took a dxpizzles break after for a bit and apparently she got drug over shards of glass for a good time over it. It's all in the past, but that's why it's funny you'd ask me if I was her. Also, I predate her on dxpizzles, only one profile ever, all posts ever made - visible.

Ohhh dramaaa!!

Posted by PhoenixRising

Posted by bkbella86


no its not about the marriage thing at all...hell im not even sure I wanna get married. But she was "dating" this guy I say that loosely because he had a gf for years and then she dumped him and he got with my friend. Imean she wasted almost all her twenties with this bum...my other friend too..shes been with her bum for longer...since hs...17 were all 27 now. smh

Noooooo. She spent a decade on another girl's man? Well, we all learn in our own ways I suppose....

click to expand

Yes it annoys me tho cuz they are great girls otherwise and Can do a million times better. What can I say tho they are gonna do them.

Posted by DMV

Posted by WaterCup
What about the women that "create" their own men? The Betty Brodericks of this world who work multiple jobs to send their men to school so they could be successful.

That's one thing I think I'm not built to do, support a man financially. I'd rather be alone. Worst of all, in most of these situations, the man seems to develop amnesia the moment he makes it to the top & drops the woman like a pile of dirty laundry. Ooh, I'd kill him too 😛

I ghink my mars in virgo makes me a bit like betty brodericks. If see potential and return, I would fund his dream but this is few far Nd between.

click to expand

Really? Are these people still in your life?

I'd help a person achieve, just not the person I sleep with. No way! Imagine if they run & share the success with someone else undeserving. I'd go insane. I'd rather be the undeserving in this case 😛

Posted by thescepter
r all ur friends taurus women?

Yes & funny because the one I know, who happens to be my best friend, is very giving to men. She likes money a bit too much, but seeing a dick makes her charitable. LOL!

Oopsie, I read it as "are all of you friends with taurus women". Disregard the post.

Hahaha^

ladies, what about you establish your own ass, this is the 21st century

Posted by hydorah
ladies, what about you establish your own ass, this is the 21st century

Hmmm, I like the sound of that! It's weird though because one a woman achieves something that resembles success then there's this thing...she becomes very intolerant in relationships with men. At least I'm that way lol. I'm not a millionaire or a business executive, not even close...but you definitely won't give me headache when I don't need you for anything..except hugs, kisses & sex.

To quote Rhihanna- EJECT & REJECT, YOUR RATCHET ASS.

Posted by thescepter
r all ur friends taurus women?

Lol one of Em yup...but she's chasing a man that has told her repeatedly that he doesn't wanna commit.

Posted by WaterCup

Posted by DMV

Posted by WaterCup
What about the women that "create" their own men? The Betty Brodericks of this world who work multiple jobs to send their men to school so they could be successful.

That's one thing I think I'm not built to do, support a man financially. I'd rather be alone. Worst of all, in most of these situations, the man seems to develop amnesia the moment he makes it to the top & drops the woman like a pile of dirty laundry. Ooh, I'd kill him too 😛

I ghink my mars in virgo makes me a bit like betty brodericks. If see potential and return, I would fund his dream but this is few far Nd between.

Really? Are these people still in your life?

I'd help a person achieve, just not the person I sleep with. No way! Imagine if they run & share the success with someone else undeserving. I'd go insane. I'd rather be the undeserving in this case 😛

click to expand

the first n only person I did it for was my ex. Its few and far between. There are levels to getting a piece of my money, but men still try.

Posted by hydorah
ladies, what about you establish your own ass, this is the 21st century

You wanna make a thread on that? Cuz that's no where In this post. Clearly I stated I'm self sufficient and need like minded people.

Posted by hydorah
ladies, what about you establish your own ass, this is the 21st century

Don't be mad you can't provide.

Posted by hydorah
ladies, what about you establish your own ass, this is the 21st century

I hear loud n clear I give these thots no love. How do u live off of a man? How do u even get the nerve to ask a man to give you money b4 u sleep with him? Cause u dont fuck for free.

Posted by Lucciferi

Posted by bkbella86
and men would you pursue a relationship if your shit isnt together at least half way?

I dream about it, haha. I barely try though. I already knew y'all thought this shit, which is the exact reason I don't put real effort into it.

click to expand

Well why would you...what can y'all do if you aren't pulling your weight and she is?

Posted by bkbella86

Posted by Lucciferi

Posted by bkbella86
and men would you pursue a relationship if your shit isnt together at least half way?

I dream about it, haha. I barely try though. I already knew y'all thought this shit, which is the exact reason I don't put real effort into it.

Well why would you...what can y'all do if you aren't pulling your weight and she is?

click to expand

it doesnt work if there isnt equality. I would end up resenting him.

Posted by Lucciferi

Posted by DMV

Posted by bkbella86

Posted by Lucciferi

Posted by bkbella86
and men would you pursue a relationship if your shit isnt together at least half way?

I dream about it, haha. I barely try though. I already knew y'all thought this shit, which is the exact reason I don't put real effort into it.

Well why would you...what can y'all do if you aren't pulling your weight and she is?

it doesnt work if there isnt equality. I would end up resenting him.

Meh, neither of you know what I'm capable of nor how I work, so it doesn't matter. It especially doesn't matter seeing as I basically AGREED with you in the first place.

click to expand

I knew you agreed, I was just adding to your statement.

how do you work? What are you capable of?

Posted by bkbella86
To date a man when your in your late twenties almost thirty who isnt established or on his way to being established? And what i mean by established is, own apt , own income, and maybe a car depending on the state in question? those are just the necessities mind you.


Would you? and seriously think about building a family with this man?

Building a family is about more than love & how you feel about that person. Love doesn't pay the bills. Building a family requires money, a decent or good credit score & the discipline to many money so that your family structure doesn't fall apart.

If a man doesn't have a $ 1 in his pocket, there is no way he should even be considering signing up for a long term investment. That's like expecting a man who has no income to be a great father to a newborn in a financial way. He can't give what he doesn't have.

Should the entire worth of a person be measured by how much money they have or whether or not they have a job? Well of course not. You're not a bad person or partner just b/c you don't have money or aren't established. Plenty of people have money but mismanage it, thus ending up just like the folks who never were established to begin with.

AMBITION is what matters. Some people have great jobs but have no ambition. Some people who are unemployed have more ambition & a drive to succeed than those who have everything. If you can tell that your man has ambition (and there are ways to tell other than his job or lack thereof), & the ability to manage the money he DOES have ( $ 1 or $ 1,000), that's what matters most

Don't measure a man's financial abilities by how much he HAS. Focus more on how he MANAGES what he has. That will tell you so much more. If a person can maintain, keep organized & keep afloat the things he has, that's def. worth committing to more than someone who has a million things but can't ever keep or manage them

Posted by Lucciferi

Posted by DMV

Posted by bkbella86

Posted by Lucciferi

Posted by bkbella86
and men would you pursue a relationship if your shit isnt together at least half way?

I dream about it, haha. I barely try though. I already knew y'all thought this shit, which is the exact reason I don't put real effort into it.

Well why would you...what can y'all do if you aren't pulling your weight and she is?

it doesnt work if there isnt equality. I would end up resenting him.

Meh, neither of you know what I'm capable of nor how I work, so it doesn't matter. It especially doesn't matter seeing as I basically AGREED with you in the first place.

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i wasnt really asking you persay but just any other man in general. nothing personal.

Posted by Lucciferi
I don't mooch, as far as I'm concerned, I'd say go out with her to a restaurant and watch her eat. I'm fine with being company.

lmao thats ridiculous