Zodiac Signs as Major U.S. Cities

Aries- Boston. Why is everybody in this city so pissed off yet so boring at the same time? Why is everyone else so illiterate?

Taurus- Charlotte. Through hard work and perseverance, we have become a very career oriented city, while still being down to Earth and chill.

Gemini- Minneapolis/St. Paul. We can't decide if we are one large city or two separate cities. We don't really like St. Paul but we really don't like Minneapolis. However, it is fun to drink and stir the pot a little. What else are we going to do? At the same time, if you are not from here we really don't want you. Now, let me tell you about how much DRAMA has gone on here over the past year. Jacob Frey is SOOOOO attractive. What are your thoughts on Amy Klobuchar? Let me tell you mine....

Cancer- San Diego. Please leave us alone unless you want to lay out in the sun by the water.

Leo- Los Angeles. LOOK AT ME! Riots, OJ Simpson, Robert Blake, earthquakes, fires, draughts, floods, nightclubs, the Nightstalker, Hollywood, the Cecil Hotel! We deserve attention!!

Virgo- Seattle. We really just want to play with our technology, drink coffee, and read books while listening to the rain.

Libra- Dallas. We will always be more elegant than you. Highland Park and SMU are really worth the cost, you just can't see it yet.

Scorpio- Baltimore. We will murder you in your sleep. Life is dark and depressing. It is always night here. This isn't Hairspray. You should be scared.

Sagittarius- New Orleans. It is all about the experience! Flash 'em, it's Mardi Gras!! Yes, Katrina was a disaster, but that is not going to stop us; we are growing again. We are the most European city in the U.S. btw.

Capricorn- New York City. Unless you want to talk about ambition and your career, leave me alone. Also, Bostonians are so brash and tacky. Remember when Gerald Ford told us to drop dead?

Aquarius- Austin. Beer and music and no state income tax. Keep Austin Weird! Why ruin it- stop moving here.

Pisces- Chicago. We just want everyone to get along. We know South Chicago is rough around the edges, but we can't help but feel guilty for not doing enough. Please no stress. I think I'm going to move to Montana or Wyoming.

Baltimore is an excellent choice for Scorpio!

I think Asheville, North Carolina would be a better choice for Libra than Dallas. You kinda did us dirt.

NYC is better for Gemini than Minneapolis.

Detroit for Sagittarius. Miami would be a good choice for them, too.

Atlanta for Leo. But Los Angeles is a pretty good selection, too. Before it became boring, anyway.

Washington DC for Capricorn. It's all about conformity, competition and the rat race even though it's drab with horrible parking and transportation. Stay home in the suburbs, annoying commuters. I actually used to like DC when I was younger, but now, I generally avoid it.

Cincinnati for Virgo. Someplace boring, where nobody will bother them.

Portland for Pisces. Anyone that's ever been to Portland will understand why.

Austin, TX for Aries. Boston is too conservative and boring for them.

Cancer - someplace rural, where nothing ever changes, so no feathers are ruffled. Same with Taurus.

Newark, NJ for Pisces...

Posted by DopeFly

Baltimore is an excellent choice for Scorpio!

I think Asheville, North Carolina would be a better choice for Libra than Dallas. You kinda did us dirt.

NYC is better for Gemini than Minneapolis.

Detroit for Sagittarius. Miami would be a good choice for them, too.

Atlanta for Leo. But Los Angeles is a pretty good selection, too. Before it became boring, anyway.

Washington DC for Capricorn. It's all about conformity, competition and the rat race even though it's drab with horrible parking and transportation. Stay home in the suburbs, annoying commuters. I actually used to like DC when I was younger, but now, I generally avoid it.

Cincinnati for Virgo. Someplace boring, where nobody will bother them.

Portland for Pisces. Anyone that's ever been to Portland will understand why.

Austin, TX for Aries. Boston is too conservative and boring for them.

Cancer - someplace rural, where nothing ever changes, so no feathers are ruffled. Same with Taurus.

Why Asheville vs Libra? Dallas is a very ritzy city. SMU is a great school, too. (I'm from Dallas and went to SMU).

No. Minneapolis is definitely Gemini. No matter how boring the area is, they will have drama. Right now, Minneapolis-

St Paul is nothing but drama

I thought of Detroit for Sag, but the Mardi Gras and flashing for beads is definitely them because YOLO.

DC for Capricorn is great. I will give you that. Everyone in DC cared they were third grade class treasurer...

Libra will take Paris. Dog poop everywhere but the city of love.

who tf is robert blake

Posted by newtothis

Aries- Boston. Why is everybody in this city so pissed off yet so boring at the same time? Why is everyone else so illiterate?

Taurus- Charlotte. Through hard work and perseverance, we have become a very career oriented city, while still being down to Earth and chill.

Gemini- Minneapolis/St. Paul. We can't decide if we are one large city or two separate cities. We don't really like St. Paul but we really don't like Minneapolis. However, it is fun to drink and stir the pot a little. What else are we going to do? At the same time, if you are not from here we really don't want you. Now, let me tell you about how much DRAMA has gone on here over the past year. Jacob Frey is SOOOOO attractive. What are your thoughts on Amy Klobuchar? Let me tell you mine....

Cancer- San Diego. Please leave us alone unless you want to lay out in the sun by the water.

Leo- Los Angeles. LOOK AT ME! Riots, OJ Simpson, Robert Blake, earthquakes, fires, draughts, floods, nightclubs, the Nightstalker, Hollywood, the Cecil Hotel! We deserve attention!!

Virgo- Seattle. We really just want to play with our technology, drink coffee, and read books while listening to the rain.

Libra- Dallas. We will always be more elegant than you. Highland Park and SMU are really worth the cost, you just can't see it yet.

Scorpio- Baltimore. We will murder you in your sleep. Life is dark and depressing. It is always night here. This isn't Hairspray. You should be scared.

Sagittarius- New Orleans. It is all about the experience! Flash 'em, it's Mardi Gras!! Yes, Katrina was a disaster, but that is not going to stop us; we are growing again. We are the most European city in the U.S. btw.

Capricorn- New York City. Unless you want to talk about ambition and your career, leave me alone. Also, Bostonians are so brash and tacky. Remember when Gerald Ford told us to drop dead?

Aquarius- Austin. Beer and music and no state income tax. Keep Austin Weird! Why ruin it- stop moving here.

Pisces- Chicago. We just want everyone to get along. We know South Chicago is rough around the edges, but we can't help but feel guilty for not doing enough. Please no stress. I think I'm going to move to Montana or Wyoming.

Chicago is far from being piscean. It's definitely Scorpio.

Posted by DonnaLibra

Libra will take Paris. Dog poop everywhere but the city of love.

Paris, texas?

Paris, tennesee?

I think there is like over a dozen cities named paris in the us

Posted by WarAngel

As a Scorpio, I claim San Antonio, Texas! 😛

PS: 🦀 too! 😁

god bless

Posted by LadyNeptune

who tf is robert blake

Robert Blake is an actor. He appeared in films from the 1930s until 2000. He was a pretty good looking guy when he was younger, but not the most prolific actor. Most notably In Cold Blood and Lost Highway. He was arrested and later acquitted for murdering his wife. Just a really creepy guy.

Posted by OnigenZ

Posted by newtothis

Aries- Boston. Why is everybody in this city so pissed off yet so boring at the same time? Why is everyone else so illiterate?

Taurus- Charlotte. Through hard work and perseverance, we have become a very career oriented city, while still being down to Earth and chill.

Gemini- Minneapolis/St. Paul. We can't decide if we are one large city or two separate cities. We don't really like St. Paul but we really don't like Minneapolis. However, it is fun to drink and stir the pot a little. What else are we going to do? At the same time, if you are not from here we really don't want you. Now, let me tell you about how much DRAMA has gone on here over the past year. Jacob Frey is SOOOOO attractive. What are your thoughts on Amy Klobuchar? Let me tell you mine....

Cancer- San Diego. Please leave us alone unless you want to lay out in the sun by the water.

Leo- Los Angeles. LOOK AT ME! Riots, OJ Simpson, Robert Blake, earthquakes, fires, draughts, floods, nightclubs, the Nightstalker, Hollywood, the Cecil Hotel! We deserve attention!!

Virgo- Seattle. We really just want to play with our technology, drink coffee, and read books while listening to the rain.

Libra- Dallas. We will always be more elegant than you. Highland Park and SMU are really worth the cost, you just can't see it yet.

Scorpio- Baltimore. We will murder you in your sleep. Life is dark and depressing. It is always night here. This isn't Hairspray. You should be scared.

Sagittarius- New Orleans. It is all about the experience! Flash 'em, it's Mardi Gras!! Yes, Katrina was a disaster, but that is not going to stop us; we are growing again. We are the most European city in the U.S. btw.

Capricorn- New York City. Unless you want to talk about ambition and your career, leave me alone. Also, Bostonians are so brash and tacky. Remember when Gerald Ford told us to drop dead?

Aquarius- Austin. Beer and music and no state income tax. Keep Austin Weird! Why ruin it- stop moving here.

Pisces- Chicago. We just want everyone to get along. We know South Chicago is rough around the edges, but we can't help but feel guilty for not doing enough. Please no stress. I think I'm going to move to Montana or Wyoming.

Chicago is far from being piscean. It's definitely Scorpio.

click to expand

The joke is Pisces wants to be like Chicago, but they can't handle the pressure and leave for Montana or Wyoming. Pisces always have high hopes and it never works out the way they want lol.

Libra- Dallas. We will always be more elegant than you. Highland Park and SMU are really worth the cost, you just can't see it yet.

Not a lie told especially the “can’t see it”part..........Paris,Tx is a definitely no along with Asheville,NC or any kind of Ville. Fr fr

Posted by WarAngel

Posted by LadyNeptune

Posted by WarAngel

As a Scorpio, I claim San Antonio, Texas! 😛

PS: 🦀 too! 😁

god bless

Thank God that fuckhead isn't from San Antonio. 😁

click to expand

He’s from Cancun

Las Vegas ~ Leo

Bling bling baby

🌟

Posted by MyStarsShine

Las Vegas ~ Leo

Bling bling baby

🌟

I could see Leo as Las Vegas. This was just my silly fun.

Posted by LadyNeptune

Posted by DonnaLibra

Libra will take Paris. Dog poop everywhere but the city of love.

Paris, texas?

Paris, tennesee?

I think there is like over a dozen cities named paris in the us

click to expand

Oh I didn't read all of the title. U.S. only....

New York

Aquarius

Hollywood....LA

Leo moon...

⭐️Look at me daaarrrllling⭐️

Posted by DopeFly

Baltimore is an excellent choice for Scorpio!

I think Asheville, North Carolina would be a better choice for Libra than Dallas. You kinda did us dirt.

NYC is better for Gemini than Minneapolis.

Detroit for Sagittarius. Miami would be a good choice for them, too.

Atlanta for Leo. But Los Angeles is a pretty good selection, too. Before it became boring, anyway.

Washington DC for Capricorn. It's all about conformity, competition and the rat race even though it's drab with horrible parking and transportation. Stay home in the suburbs, annoying commuters. I actually used to like DC when I was younger, but now, I generally avoid it.

Cincinnati for Virgo. Someplace boring, where nobody will bother them.

Portland for Pisces. Anyone that's ever been to Portland will understand why.

Austin, TX for Aries. Boston is too conservative and boring for them.

Cancer - someplace rural, where nothing ever changes, so no feathers are ruffled. Same with Taurus.

Cincinnati isnt boring tho lol I was born across the river...the food here is amazing like goetta. I'll kick babies in the face for it.

Posted by newtothis

Posted by DopeFly

Baltimore is an excellent choice for Scorpio!

I think Asheville, North Carolina would be a better choice for Libra than Dallas. You kinda did us dirt.

NYC is better for Gemini than Minneapolis.

Detroit for Sagittarius. Miami would be a good choice for them, too.

Atlanta for Leo. But Los Angeles is a pretty good selection, too. Before it became boring, anyway.

Washington DC for Capricorn. It's all about conformity, competition and the rat race even though it's drab with horrible parking and transportation. Stay home in the suburbs, annoying commuters. I actually used to like DC when I was younger, but now, I generally avoid it.

Cincinnati for Virgo. Someplace boring, where nobody will bother them.

Portland for Pisces. Anyone that's ever been to Portland will understand why.

Austin, TX for Aries. Boston is too conservative and boring for them.

Cancer - someplace rural, where nothing ever changes, so no feathers are ruffled. Same with Taurus.

Why Asheville vs Libra? Dallas is a very ritzy city. SMU is a great school, too. (I'm from Dallas and went to SMU).

No. Minneapolis is definitely Gemini. No matter how boring the area is, they will have drama. Right now, Minneapolis-

St Paul is nothing but drama

I thought of Detroit for Sag, but the Mardi Gras and flashing for beads is definitely them because YOLO.

DC for Capricorn is great. I will give you that. Everyone in DC cared they were third grade class treasurer...

click to expand

lmao great pick for Capricorn as DC. I fell in love with that place... just everyone seemed to have direction and purpose and somewhere to be. And quality, nutritious food.. just a cherry on top. I wouldn't mind living there 4-6 months of the year.

Everyone has critiqued my choices except for Scorpio as Baltimore LOL.

It is Edgar Allan Poe's hometown.

1 out of 12 ain't bad 🙂