deriving comfort from imagining worst case scenarios ?

I didn’t know whether to post this in the psychology forum but

does anyone else have this weird habit of mentally/emotionally preparing for the worst as a defense mechanism sort of thing ?

Whenever I do anything in life, I try my absolute best and give it my all so that I don’t end up with a single regret afterwards. Also if you give something your all, you don’t have to make any excuses to yourself later like “why didn’t I try harder—” so I think it’s super important to approach anything in life with your whole heart and effort.

but i’ve noticed that in the back of my mind, i’m always imagining and preparing myself for the worst case scenario and being ready for that comforts me in a strange way...?

like for example, I’m in a happy, stable relationship right now but I’m always imagining what my life will be like if my partner decides to leave one day. And I’m kinda like mentally and emotionally rehearsing for it...? even though it’s unlikely to happen...?

I also catch myself trying to mentally and emotionally prepare myself for when my loved ones pass away one day....like rehearsing their death? i rehearse my own death too (for example, i’ll be cleaning my apartment or thinking about making a big purchase or something and will think to myself “I don’t know when I’m gonna die so I don’t need that” and throw something away or not make a frivolous purchase....I really love spending money on other people, buying them presents and things but when it comes to me, I feel kinda weird about it..? i’ll buy small things for myself but not big things )

Also, pretty much with everything else in life (business, problem solving , etc anything )

I always have at least three different plans ready for when a situation goes south. Being prepared just brings me comfort....my fear is probably losing control of myself.... It’s a fact of life that we can’t control outside circumstances and other people, so I think I derive comfort from knowing I can at least control my self and how i deal with situations... I dunno ...

anyone else have this habit of rehearsing for tragedies and worst case situations so you’ll be prepared when it happens ?

sorry for the weird ass question

i do this all the time. but i've noticed that tho it helps me get through things in a practical sense, it still takes a toll on me emotionally.

Yes, I always plan for the worst. Oddly, It helps me take big risks.... although calculated.

Doesn't effect me emotioally though.

But, the death part is like making sure I live and love hard now...

Yes, all.aboit no regrets.

Not good with people..effects attachment.

Like having a important discussion you never had. Sense you lived it you act normal and nothing is resolved in real life. Do careful about that.

With some things but not with deaths. I don't want to think about it right now. I rather deal with the pain when and if it comes.

I used to be like this but then I hit 35+ and I'm like I'll just cross the bridge when I get there.

No and to tell you the stone cold truth, I need to. I check up on my elderly mom every now and then cus she's vulnerable. And with my Pisces nephew staying there with her I don't know if I can put my full trust in that boy so I do think about the worst case scenario about my mom but try very hard to think positive.

Deriving comfort from being pessimistic = Pisces energy 😛

Posted by virgoOPPP

i do this all the time. but i've noticed that tho it helps me get through things in a practical sense, it still takes a toll on me emotionally.

yeah it oddly helps me get through things too. the fear of it happening doesn't paralyze you anymore 'cause you've already rehearsed it in your head. i know this habit is probably unhealthy af but it helps in certain cases

Posted by ScorpioDreams

Yes, I do this all the time. Especially imagining the death of my family and loved ones. How I would cope etc. I know it’s going to be extremely difficult for me to overcome and I dread the day it actually happens. Sometimes I wonder why I torture myself with that outcome in my mind. I guess in a strange way I’m trying to prepare myself. Maybe it’s a way I cope with my fears….even my irrational fears like sometimes before I go someplace I fear getting into a car accident and I imagine what it would be like. Play it out in my head. Sometimes it’s so bad that I talk myself out of even leaving the house. It’s draining sometimes.

yeah it can be hard to differentiate between valid fears and irrational fears sometimes....car accidents are pretty common so your fears are based on real life observations to an extent....i've rehearsed plane crashes in my head but i still got on planes so many times 'cause my desire to travel won out...? 😅

so, as long as you're not letting your fears prevent you from enjoying your life, i think it's ok

Posted by VenusAquarius

Yes, I always plan for the worst. Oddly, It helps me take big risks.... although calculated.

Doesn't effect me emotioally though.

But, the death part is like making sure I live and love hard now...

Yes, all.aboit no regrets.

are you an aries ?

'cause i'm exactly the same way! imagining the worst case actually makes me more bold and unafraid of taking huge risks (calculated). and yeah reminding myself that our time on this earth is limited, makes me wanna be kinder to people.

Posted by PezRojoPescadoAzul

Barely related, sorry, but in the US anyways people use the expression "what's the worst that could happen?" to mean "just do it, if it doesn't work out then oh well" type of way and it's the funniest thing to me lol. Because boy let me tell ya, the worst that COULD happen in any situation is pretty, pretty, pretty bad lol

Of course that's taking the expression too literally when it really means more "what's the worst thing that has a reasonable chance of happening, it won't be that bad." But still I sort of laugh to myself whenever I hear someone say that

lol true haha

@Lostthoughts

yeah for sure. i get what you mean...

@Timone

@Mutya

that's probably the healthiest way to deal with things...lol 'cause by rehearsing tragedies in your head, you're needlessly putting yourself through it more than once...so it can't be healthy...😅

@Jumpin_Jupiter

is she in any kinda danger...? call her often and visit for sure.

@MyStarsShine

since you brought up pisces energy, i was curious to see if me being born on the pisces cusp had anything to do with it, so i randomly typed "pisces imagining" on google images and.........😂😂😂

i literally can't believe they have a freakin meme for this.....

Posted by serenidad

@Lostthoughts

yeah for sure. i get what you mean...

@Timone

@Mutya

that's probably the healthiest way to deal with things...lol 'cause by rehearsing tragedies in your head, you're needlessly putting yourself through it more than once...so it can't be healthy...😅

@Jumpin_Jupiter

is she in any kinda danger...? call her often and visit for sure.

@MyStarsShine

since you brought up pisces energy, i was curious to see if me being born on the pisces cusp had anything to do with it, so i randomly typed "pisces imagining" on google images and.........😂😂😂

i literally can't believe they have a freakin meme for this.....

Squidward!

I’m dying 😂😅🤣

Posted by serenidad

@Lostthoughts

yeah for sure. i get what you mean...

@Timone

@Mutya

that's probably the healthiest way to deal with things...lol 'cause by rehearsing tragedies in your head, you're needlessly putting yourself through it more than once...so it can't be healthy...😅

@Jumpin_Jupiter

is she in any kinda danger...? call her often and visit for sure.

@MyStarsShine

since you brought up pisces energy, i was curious to see if me being born on the pisces cusp had anything to do with it, so i randomly typed "pisces imagining" on google images and.........😂😂😂

i literally can't believe they have a freakin meme for this.....

Na I wouldn't say she's in any danger. It's just that I feel she got one foot in the grave and I oftentimes think about the inevitable....death. that's one I'm not good at coping with. My grandparents was different in this case cus I was only a little boy when they passed. I have thought about leaving my house for a long while and go move in with her but I just can't do it. She's a huge nagger, thanks to her being a Virgo. And with my Pisces nephew being over there now only because he and his crazy girlfriend got into a fight, me and him don't really get on too well either. If the reason why his girlfriend box him up for the reason I'm thinking, then who am I to blame her.

Yes this is me. I always am thinking worse case scenario. But in an upbeat way.

I like to say I am optimistically glass half full.

It calms any anxiety to consider things going to shit and having a plan in place. Maybe this is the cap influence in my chart. Feeling prepared to face the worst lets me enjoy being present for the best.

I used to be like this but then I stopped. I now only imagine positive outcomes and nothing else because the basis of manifestation would cause any thoughts, positive or negative to come to fruition so just keepin’ things simply positive.

Try being a Scorpio moon. Sometimes I create the best scenario, and live like a king, then make everything around me collapse because I felt I didn't deserve it, or didn't learn enough. So I throw myself back to the bottom. I call it the tower effect. At all times in every scenario I expect or plan for the worst. It's simply happening at all times around me, and in every way possible so why wouldn't I? So at best I'm just avoiding collateral damage. Until I inevitably don't.

I actually relate with you though. I think about the death of everything I love, and being forced to live a completely different life. That itself is the tower effect. The idea of everything that was built up and trusted over a long period of time, suddenly comes crashing down unexpectedly, and then, you are left at the bottom alone. Forced to either get up and move on, or lay down and die. I kind of like the idea of things coming to and end, but even more deeply hate the idea of life holding me under it's foot. I won't die like a dog, even if I truly suffer though every second of it. Until I collapse by my own will, I won't stop.

Posted by Soul

Try being a Scorpio moon. Sometimes I create the best scenario, and live like a king, then make everything around me collapse because I felt I didn't deserve it, or didn't learn enough. So I throw myself back to the bottom. I call it the tower effect. At all times in every scenario I expect or plan for the worst. It's simply happening at all times around me, and in every way possible so why wouldn't I? So at best I'm just avoiding collateral damage. Until I inevitably don't.

I actually relate with you though. I think about the death of everything I love, and being forced to live a completely different life. That itself is the tower effect. The idea of everything that was built up and trusted over a long period of time, suddenly comes crashing down unexpectedly, and then, you are left at the bottom alone. Forced to either get up and move on, or lay down and die. I kind of like the idea of things coming to and end, but even more deeply hate the idea of life holding me under it's foot. I won't die like a dog, even if I truly suffer though every second of it. Until I collapse by my own will, I won't stop.

That happened to me in reality 😬

sorry for the late replies...

@Jumpin_Jupiter

i think parents are always relieved to hear from their kids who live far away. i remember seeing a quote , it was like "when you lose someone, the first thing you forget about them is their voice." so call them as much as you can and hear their voice while you still can. i noticed recently that i have many pictures of my loved ones but not enough videos of them? i wanna record their voices more so i don't forget...also, visiting is always better than calling but i know that there have been traveling restrictions with corona and everything. hopefully you'll get to see your mom soon...

@LadyNeptune

yeah, exactly. there's a certain peace/calmness that comes from knowing you'll somehow figure it out regardless of what life may bring.

i've also noticed that this imagining the worst habit doesn't necessarily strip away the joy of life, but you actually appreciate the good things MORE 'cause you know they could be taken from you at any moment. (you appreciate the people in your life more, you appreciate all the things that are going right in your life that much more)

@Maxian

@SassyKiwi

yeah it's super important to always hope for the best. you don't wanna go into anything with a defeatist mindset ever.

@Soul

this part struck a chord with me,

"Forced to either get up and move on, or lay down and die. I kind of like the idea of things coming to and end, but even more deeply hate the idea of life holding me under it's foot. I won't die like a dog, even if I truly suffer though every second of it. Until I collapse by my own will, I won't stop. "

there are so many things in life that are beyond our control, but i guess we don't want ourselves to be one of those things. having control over our own fate and outcome allows us some form of dignity (?) if that's even the right word.... like that one saying goes, "without dignity, identity is erased." i dunno.... it's empowering nonetheless to know that you can decide which way your life goes....no one likes feeling helpless.



"Try being a Scorpio moon. Sometimes I create the best scenario, and live like a king, then make everything around me collapse because I felt I didn't deserve it, or didn't learn enough. So I throw myself back to the bottom."

i'm curious to know why you felt like you didn't deserve something but it's ok if you don't want to talk about it... i just hope it's nothing related to self-rejection.

Posted by serenidad

"Try being a Scorpio moon. Sometimes I create the best scenario, and live like a king, then make everything around me collapse because I felt I didn't deserve it, or didn't learn enough. So I throw myself back to the bottom."

i'm curious to know why you felt like you didn't deserve something but it's ok if you don't want to talk about it... i just hope it's nothing related to self-rejection.

It's much less self-rejection, and more self-sabotage. I tend to ruin positive things in my life. I have no idea why. Maybe I dislike being at the bottom, but also dislike being at the top in my life. Because the bottom sucks, and the top means I'm complete, and have nothing more to gain. Like I've reached the limit, and can live comfortably. To me that seems off for some reason. Maybe I'm more fascinated with the process in-between.

Tbh I honestly think something deep inside of me simply wants to see how much turmoil I can physical and mentally take lol.

Posted by Soul

Posted by serenidad

"Try being a Scorpio moon. Sometimes I create the best scenario, and live like a king, then make everything around me collapse because I felt I didn't deserve it, or didn't learn enough. So I throw myself back to the bottom."

i'm curious to know why you felt like you didn't deserve something but it's ok if you don't want to talk about it... i just hope it's nothing related to self-rejection.

It's much less self-rejection, and more self-sabotage. I tend to ruin positive things in my life. I have no idea why. Maybe I dislike being at the bottom, but also dislike being at the top in my life. Because the bottom sucks, and the top means I'm complete, and have nothing more to gain. Like I've reached the limit, and can live comfortably. To me that seems off for some reason. Maybe I'm more fascinated with the process in-between.

Tbh I honestly think something deep inside of me simply wants to see how much turmoil I can physical and mentally take lol.

click to expand

maybe it's the whole death/rebirth thing (you being a scorpio moon and all)

i can kinda relate to that whole getting a kick out of seeing how much turmoil you can take thing.

turning pain into power is exhilarating in a way...

also, you tend to find out who you really are and what you're really capable of in the midst of chaos.

not when life is going super good and everything is under control.

but i feel like the self-sabotaging thing might harm you more thank you think.

peace is also priceless. and especially in this hectic world, any peaceful moment, any positive thing going on in your life should be cherished, not ruined.

if you have worked hard for something, prayed for something, waited a long time for something, and it's now in your life, why sabotage it...? you probably deserved the good/positive things that happened to you so you may as well enjoy it.

also, as humans, i don't think we'll ever be "complete" or "done with learning lessons".

even when you've reached a certain point/limit in your life, something else/something new will always pop up lol

Posted by SphinxFinks

My Saturn and Pluto energies find comfort somewhat in negativity because it is a harsh reality of life, but it don't mean I should not have fun.

The idea is to find a healthy middle ground, I have Saturn and Pluto oppositions, but I do have trines to them too.

Moon conjunct Mars see's all things emotively and can see peoples agenda and hidden motives, but with a Pluto opposition that can cause major conflict, it's like supercharging the emotions, but also trying to control others (Immature).

Pluto and Saturn offer the ability to become a self master, to master yourself.

To have a style means to be in control of something, having no style means you are in control but also out of control altogether, you allow your energies to run with life.

yes. finding a healthy middle ground is important. Being a realist but still maintaining a certain level of optimism is the way to go.

i've always loved the idea of mastering oneself.

some of my fav quotes :

"without self mastery, we are slaves to fear."

"the cyclone derives its powers from a calm center. so does a person."