Trouble in paradise (Page 2)

Or:

Better keep the child away from her, it will tarnish an innocent child's life having to meet such a highly stung, ignorant and idiotic bitch.

Because I can't believe that a decent human being in this century would make such a fuss out a little innocent bastard. I thought she discovered that he was a pedophile who also murdered his mum and robbed the neighbours.

Children are not something to be ashamed of. Never.

Posted by Undine
Because I can't believe that a decent human being in this century would make such a fuss out a little innocent bastard. I thought she discovered that he was a pedophile who also murdered his mum and robbed the neighbours.

How many women step out on their husbands and get pregnant and never say shit to him? 10 years down the road it comes out.

To be honest, Star, I would forgive many things, because I understand that he has hidden them out of fear of being deal breakers. Out of fear that "we" are not going to happen.I would realise that he was fearing for us, not for himself.

Some are not even deal breaker. For example, my ex husband never mentioned that he was previously married, or that he had some debts.

There are things in my life that I don't talk about either. I don't feel obliged to, and it is very unlikely that they will ever surface.

Posted by Undine
Children are not something to be ashamed of. Never.

+1

that's why alot of children grow up disillusioned, and when they see other folks having great parents and lots of love there, they feel like the world handed them scraps, and why did they bother being born?

If I one day found out the person I married had a previous child that he already knew about, but didnt tell me about, I would ask a few questions.

1: "Why didnt you tell me? Did you feel you could not trust me with that information?"
2: "Why arent you a part of the child's life?"

Number two would be the biggest, most important question.
But if the child was previously unknown about, for example a past lover that never informed him of the pregnancy, then Idont see an issue. If he wanted, I would be more than happy to welcome it with open arms.

Posted by buyonegetone
If I one day found out the person I married had a previous child that he already knew about, but didnt tell me about, I would ask a few questions.

1: "Why didnt you tell me? Did you feel you could not trust me with that information?"
2: "Why arent you a part of the child's life?"

Number two would be the biggest, most important question.
But if the child was previously unknown about, for example a past lover that never informed him of the pregnancy, then Idont see an issue. If he wanted, I would be more than happy to welcome it with open arms.

i know there's alot of women out there that would be lovely and do that.

this reminds me of the TRUE story of my relative's in laws....

i told this true story before,
where the woman has a husband who had a mistress for years.

Yes, they all KNOW and knew!!!! it was not a secret. lol

and she the wife opened her arms wide open for the children out of wedlock.

i thought wow, that woman is amazing.

Did you guys notice the +1?

Posted by WateryGem

It speaks volumes of a man if he doesn't share he has a child. What kind of dad is he? If he has hidden this part of his life for years, that means he wasn't truly being open and honest.

I'm not following your logic.

For him to hide a baby from her measures him as a husband.

But, how do you proclaim that it measures him as a father?

So, if a guy doesn't tell someone about his child .. that means he's a bad father?

lol ... how delusional

I didn't read any further, so maybe this comment was cleared up .. I'll finish reading now

I agree with Undine and Lady .... not surprising that the Fish can see right through the bullshit.

Posted by P-Angel

Posted by WateryGem

It speaks volumes of a man if he doesn't share he has a child. What kind of dad is he? If he has hidden this part of his life for years, that means he wasn't truly being open and honest.

I'm not following your logic.

For him to hide a baby from her measures him as a husband.

But, how do you proclaim that it measures him as a father?

So, if a guy doesn't tell someone about his child .. that means he's a bad father?

lol ... how delusional

click to expand

It measures him as a father because it means he is not in the child's life. If he WAS in the child's life, his wife would know about it. And so the big question with that is, why isnt he? It could be that the child is living in a faraway country and both parents decided contact with bio-Dad would be confusing. Or it could mean he is simply a deadbeat father who doesnt give two shits.

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Posted by buyonegetone

Posted by P-Angel

Posted by WateryGem

It speaks volumes of a man if he doesn't share he has a child. What kind of dad is he? If he has hidden this part of his life for years, that means he wasn't truly being open and honest.

I'm not following your logic.

For him to hide a baby from her measures him as a husband.

But, how do you proclaim that it measures him as a father?

So, if a guy doesn't tell someone about his child .. that means he's a bad father?

lol ... how delusional

It measures him as a father because it means he is not in the child's life. If he WAS in the child's life, his wife would know about it. And so the big question with that is, why isnt he? It could be that the child is living in a faraway country and both parents decided contact with bio-Dad would be confusing. Or it could mean he is simply a deadbeat father who doesnt give two shits.

click to expand

Considering she is so well put together - would she married a deadbeat and had him as a childhood love?

Posted by buyonegetone

It measures him as a father because it means he is not in the child's life.

If he WAS in the child's life, his wife would know about it.

You don't know if he's in the child's life ... what an absurd conclusion.

And yes, a Wife would .. but, not a bride necessary if they weren't living together and/or attached at the hip. If he had a lot of space in the relationship then it's perfectly plausible that he could have a hidden child, in whom he interacts with regularly and is a good father.

wtf? In your logic, every single woman should be graded on her abilities as a mother with equal comparison to her being a good girlfriend/wife.

You guys are so ridiculuous.

Considering they are newlyweds, and the bride just now finds out ....... if you want to be logical, then think in logical terms ..... she's just now finding out that he has a kid in his life because she's just now keeping track of all of her husbands coming and goings vs as boyfriend/girlfriend, unless they were living together, she wouldn't know everything he was doing unless he told her.

So, I don't get how anyone is making judgment calls on his ability as a father, based on his ability to be a good boyfriend/now husband.

Posted by Moonbutter

Posted by AgentP911
Let's rewind a bit here.

OP says she's discovered some really disturbing things about her husband.

Discovered as in past tense so this actually happened. She actually discovered some things.

Things being plural meaning more than one thing.

So far OP has only 'reason to believe' he has a child.

So technically she hasn't actually discovered a thing or things for definite.

Oh dear, OP's well put together self and the life which is the envy of all looks like it isn't all it's cracked up to be underneath.

Exactly! And yeah this news is a "big deal", but not in the sense you would feel embarrassed to share on this forum. This whole thread makes no sense and OP you are rude for suggesting someone is stupid because she gave you some reality you couldn't handle. Your world isn't crashing down, there is much worse going on in relationships, world, etc. Take a deep breath, pull yourself together and confront the issues.

click to expand

MonikaK is so 'PUT TOGETHER' - she is carrying her puttogetherness like a flag!
No one allowed to make a mistake in her presentse.
This is how I am reading it but maybe I am off by mile. Just seems this way.

In considering how high and mighty she believes she is ..... it's plausible that he is afraid of talking to her about it, or worried.

That, in itself, should speak volumes. If your partner won't share things with you, then it might be about your inability to tolerate/cope with that truth ... and not about his desire to keep it a secret.

And I think we will never to find out if child was conceived while they were dating because
MonikaK threw us a bone to chew on and left the building. Because no one understood her.

Wow so many vultures on this site calling me things!

1800-275-5336 extension 05230576

Please, call.

Yes, your right. I do think pretty highly of myself. Why wouldn't I? I think that's what hits me the hardest. That he would do this to ME. We're like the couple that people take notice of. When we walk down the street all heads turn onto us. I'm sorry if people here don't understand the full picture.

oh and to Cuntdine, drop dead. Sounds like this one hit home for you huh? stinky fish.

Posted by P-Angel

In considering how high and mighty she believes she is ..... it's plausible that he is afraid of talking to her about it, or worried.

That, in itself, should speak volumes. If your partner won't share things with you, then it might be about your inability to tolerate/cope with that truth ... and not about his desire to keep it a secret.

This is true and a good point.

Posted by P-Angel

In considering how high and mighty she believes she is ..... it's plausible that he is afraid of talking to her about it, or worried.

That, in itself, should speak volumes. If your partner won't share things with you, then it might be about your inability to tolerate/cope with that truth ... and not about his desire to keep it a secret.

So now it's her fault b/c he lied and didn't tell her he had a child the entire time they were dating, engaged, planning a wedding? A father that is involved would have his son or daughter there? Wouldn't that be weird to NOT include those parts of your life with your love and your child?

The entire post is vague, she hasn't filled in the blanks but I don't care if she does. She doesn't owe us an explanation, she came here explaining how she felt. She doesn't have to justify her feelings, she has a right to feel how she wants whether you agree or not.

I bet she was in a place that she felt her life was exactly how she planned it and it felt like a dream. Finding out something huge like a child, after being with the person for years would devastate me and I would feel so much betrayal if that person did indeed keep it from me.

Are people never allowed to put their feelings out there for someone to just give comfort and support? Maybe, she doesn't have anyone else she could pour her feelings out to and feels embarrassed and ashamed to tell anyone that her husband would keep stuff like that from her. That's just my .2...

Posted by WateryGem

Posted by P-Angel

In considering how high and mighty she believes she is ..... it's plausible that he is afraid of talking to her about it, or worried.

That, in itself, should speak volumes. If your partner won't share things with you, then it might be about your inability to tolerate/cope with that truth ... and not about his desire to keep it a secret.

So now it's her fault b/c he lied and didn't tell her he had a child the entire time they were dating, engaged, planning a wedding? A father that is involved would have his son or daughter there? Wouldn't that be weird to NOT include those parts of your life with your love and your child?

The entire post is vague, she hasn't filled in the blanks but I don't care if she does. She doesn't owe us an explanation, she came here explaining how she felt. She doesn't have to justify her feelings, she has a right to feel how she wants whether you agree or not.

I bet she was in a place that she felt her life was exactly how she planned it and it felt like a dream. Finding out something huge like a child, after being with the person for years would devastate me and I would feel so much betrayal if that person did indeed keep it from me.

Are people never allowed to put their feelings out there for someone to just give comfort and support? Maybe, she doesn't have anyone else she could pour her feelings out to and feels embarrassed and ashamed to tell anyone that her husband would keep stuff like that from her. That's just my .2...

click to expand

Don't let that Cancer Venus get the better of your heart.

@Happygolucky that Venus of mine.. :/ LOL

Posted by MonicaK
Yes, your right. I do think pretty highly of myself. Why wouldn't I? I think that's what hits me the hardest. That he would do this to ME. We're like the couple that people take notice of. When we walk down the street all heads turn onto us. I'm sorry if people here don't understand the full picture.

oh and to Cuntdine, drop dead. Sounds like this one hit home for you huh? stinky fish.

You are like a child!
Bruce Willis adored Demi Moore and had NO idea she will ever honor him with a glance.
It had not stopped him from fucking their maid. Shell I continue?

And to be in the forums you have to toughen up. No one is going to lick you all over here.
Here are plenty of gorgeous people I am sure and you just being one of thousands.

I'm gorgeous... Inside and out Ž

Posted by MonicaK
. We're like the couple that people take notice of. When we walk down the street all heads turn onto us.

smfh.

So this kid ruines your tabloid picture perfect life.

No wonder he kept it a secret. He should keep this child's life as separate as possible from your shallowness.

Posted by WateryGem
@Happygolucky that Venus of mine.. :/ LOL

You know its true

Posted by MonicaK
Yes, your right. I do think pretty highly of myself. Why wouldn't I? I think that's what hits me the hardest. That he would do this to ME. We're like the couple that people take notice of. When we walk down the street all heads turn onto us. I'm sorry if people here don't understand the full picture.

oh and to Cuntdine, drop dead. Sounds like this one hit home for you huh? stinky fish.

I noticed that it's not you, but the "couple" who attracts attention.

So what kind of circus are you putting as a couple?

Let me guess....he probably has got you on a leash, half naked and walking on your fours! Bwahahaha! Love the "full picture".

Posted by starlover

Posted by ellle
what's you and your husband's sign?

I was going to ask Monica the same question

click to expand

I would have a guess, but I'm afraid to offend all the lovely peeps of that sign 😄!

I also noticed you've changed your avi to "Sweet Sixteen".

I wonder why, your mental age is about 5.

Is that the age of his love child...?

If that is true, then I understand your anguish:

HE'S 85 AND HAS SOMEONE (ELSE) TO INHERIT HIS LIFE SAVINGS!!!!!!

Posted by starlover

Posted by Undine

Posted by starlover

Posted by ellle
what's you and your husband's sign?

I was going to ask Monica the same question

I would have a guess, but I'm afraid to offend all the lovely peeps of that sign 😄!

Gemini?

Most of them need two women i have noticed

😛

click to expand

Nah, they just need a Pisces!

Posted by MonicaK
Yes, your right. I do think pretty highly of myself. Why wouldn't I? I think that's what hits me the hardest. That he would do this to ME. We're like the couple that people take notice of. When we walk down the street all heads turn onto us. I'm sorry if people here don't understand the full picture.

oh and to Cuntdine, drop dead. Sounds like this one hit home for you huh? stinky fish.

And another thing!

You forgot "gorgeous" after "drop dead"!

Damn, girl. So little attention to detail.

Posted by munchykin
Lol @ you earnestly living a life revolving around getting cheap 2 second glances from strangers on the street who will never think about you again.

If there are 100 strangers per day giving one glance it is 100 glances per day!