Why does my husband criticize and critique my physical appearance?

I am currently 5ft4 and 138 pounds. I was just 156 pounds eight months ago. Growing up and until this day I have always had an extreme big appetite and a fast metabolism. My weight always goes up and down because I struggle with depression and on top of that I am on the Nexplanon which messes with my appetite sometimes. I lose weight more easier and faster with minimal effort but gaining weight is always a process for me. Me and my husband are newlyweds and have been married two weeks. Before we got married he told me out of nowhere that he wanted to get me pregnant so that I could pick up some weight and even told me he wanted me to pick up some more weight but tells me I'm sexy and beautiful and perfect just the way I am? I would like to pick up some weight but it's not an overnight process for me. It happened last month I confronted him about it and he apologized and never made anymore comments about my weight. When he apologized I forgave him but I can't help but to still think about it sometimes because here I am stressed out even more obsessing over my weight trying to stuff down my face! I just want to cry sometimes just thinking about it. Whenever he sees a woman bigger walk by in public he always comments on their bodies saying how nice they are. Why doesn't he do that with me? Not only does he critique my body but my hair too. Today my sister in laws gave me compliments on my hair. But then my husband said "I want her hair to be longer my wife's hair should've been down to the middle of her back by now." I already have shoulder length hair and my hair grows fast but not overnight. I feel like he may have this certain image in his mind on how he wants me to look. My husband doesn't critique my physical appearance everyday but he does it enough to make me feel insecure about myself and our relationship. Could I not be the right one for him? Could he not be attracted to me physically? He says he loves me for all of me and that I'm perfect for him but it doesn't seem like it. It's almost like he's giving me mixed messages.

What's your husband sign?

I️ can’t read this wall of text but to your title I’ll answer: BECAUSE HE IS PERFECT!

Unless he was made of money - he would be a history...for me anyway!

Next time he makes a comment about your hair say “Well my hair can grow, unlike your dick...”

138 at 5’4 is within the healthy range. Why are you trying to gain weight?? Are women in your culture considered more beautiful as bbw?

I’m 155/160 at 5’8” and I’m an athlete and muscle weighs more than fat. Still I’m on the heavier side (lbs wise) for my height.

Unless your a body builder,...I can’t see being 150/60 at 5’4” as being very healthy.

Having excess fat around your middle is horrible for your long term health

Basically your current weight sounds perfect for your height.

Don’t let him pressure you into having a baby if your not ready for that over something as superficial as ‘gaining a few pds’. This is a child’s life in the balance. Not a fad diet.

Here is my assessment of the situation,

I have a specific type. I am very attracted to dark-skinned men with full lips, strong ethnic features, and at times, full or half beards can catch my attention as well.

When I am with my friends, I catch a glimpse of other men, admiring their physical features of course, notice the operative words here...with my friends....not in front of my man. There is a difference. The difference is called respect.

...And the men that I observe other than my man, has the same physical characteristics as my man. Why be attracted to one thing, just to settle for something else? I like what I like! I would expect my man to be attracted to what he liked...don't patronize me by stating I'm wonderful, and great, and so on...when clearly there is zero physical attraction.

I think the OP has every right to feel insecure.

Posted by TheTinMan
Just imagine if I live in a big crowded city. Omg I just know my eyes would lock on every beautiful women I see walk past me. I'll be like that cartoon wolf howling.

lmao

jesus christ.

Posted by Turquoise
I am currently 5ft4 and 138 pounds. I was just 156 pounds eight months ago. Growing up and until this day I have always had an extreme big appetite and a fast metabolism. My weight always goes up and down because I struggle with depression and on top of that I am on the Nexplanon which messes with my appetite sometimes. I lose weight more easier and faster with minimal effort but gaining weight is always a process for me. Me and my husband are newlyweds and have been married two weeks. Before we got married he told me out of nowhere that he wanted to get me pregnant so that I could pick up some weight and even told me he wanted me to pick up some more weight but tells me I'm sexy and beautiful and perfect just the way I am? I would like to pick up some weight but it's not an overnight process for me. It happened last month I confronted him about it and he apologized and never made anymore comments about my weight. When he apologized I forgave him but I can't help but to still think about it sometimes because here I am stressed out even more obsessing over my weight trying to stuff down my face! I just want to cry sometimes just thinking about it. Whenever he sees a woman bigger walk by in public he always comments on their bodies saying how nice they are. Why doesn't he do that with me? Not only does he critique my body but my hair too. Today my sister in laws gave me compliments on my hair. But then my husband said "I want her hair to be longer my wife's hair should've been down to the middle of her back by now." I already have shoulder length hair and my hair grows fast but not overnight. I feel like he may have this certain image in his mind on how he wants me to look. My husband doesn't critique my physical appearance everyday but he does it enough to make me feel insecure about myself and our relationship. Could I not be the right one for him? Could he not be attracted to me physically? He says he loves me for all of me and that I'm perfect for him but it doesn't seem like it. It's almost like he's giving me mixed messages.

why do i get danny devito and rhea perlman vibes??

Posted by Turquoise
I am currently 5ft4 and 138 pounds. I was just 156 pounds eight months ago. Growing up and until this day I have always had an extreme big appetite and a fast metabolism. My weight always goes up and down because I struggle with depression and on top of that I am on the Nexplanon which messes with my appetite sometimes. I lose weight more easier and faster with minimal effort but gaining weight is always a process for me. Me and my husband are newlyweds and have been married two weeks. Before we got married he told me out of nowhere that he wanted to get me pregnant so that I could pick up some weight and even told me he wanted me to pick up some more weight but tells me I'm sexy and beautiful and perfect just the way I am? I would like to pick up some weight but it's not an overnight process for me. It happened last month I confronted him about it and he apologized and never made anymore comments about my weight. When he apologized I forgave him but I can't help but to still think about it sometimes because here I am stressed out even more obsessing over my weight trying to stuff down my face! I just want to cry sometimes just thinking about it. Whenever he sees a woman bigger walk by in public he always comments on their bodies saying how nice they are. Why doesn't he do that with me? Not only does he critique my body but my hair too. Today my sister in laws gave me compliments on my hair. But then my husband said "I want her hair to be longer my wife's hair should've been down to the middle of her back by now." I already have shoulder length hair and my hair grows fast but not overnight. I feel like he may have this certain image in his mind on how he wants me to look. My husband doesn't critique my physical appearance everyday but he does it enough to make me feel insecure about myself and our relationship. Could I not be the right one for him? Could he not be attracted to me physically? He says he loves me for all of me and that I'm perfect for him but it doesn't seem like it. It's almost like he's giving me mixed messages.

something is wrong with him if he keeps focusing on your body.

id spite him.



tell him is he perfect??

and he knows you're insecure about it so he keeps on.

Posted by AneemA04
Reading this making me remember about my ex who wanted me to "look better" with fair skin. He basically would ask me to consume some vitamin to help make my complexion lighter.

Look, your husband is annoying af. Did he demand you to gain weight even before he married you?

I obviously think that your husband is an ass but since you have already married with him, you gotta roll with his demands..

Gaining weight would be easy just eat like a whale, I would love to do that if I were you as I love food.

Don't get insecure, next time he starts to "complain" about your weight, just say, "yeah ima eat now." Or "I'm working on it."

Or simply, "shut the fvck up."

Or! You do the same to him.

"Ahh I wish you would gain more muscle.." and then when you see more toned body of men, you compliment them in front of him.

Eye for an eye

Sorry if this advice doesn't sound good enough. I'm in a bad mood.

if a woman can't hack these type of men,

they need a diplomatic kind man who will never hurt their feelings.

Posted by Turquoise
I am currently 5ft4 and 138 pounds. I was just 156 pounds eight months ago. Growing up and until this day I have always had an extreme big appetite and a fast metabolism. My weight always goes up and down because I struggle with depression and on top of that I am on the Nexplanon which messes with my appetite sometimes. I lose weight more easier and faster with minimal effort but gaining weight is always a process for me. Me and my husband are newlyweds and have been married two weeks. Before we got married he told me out of nowhere that he wanted to get me pregnant so that I could pick up some weight and even told me he wanted me to pick up some more weight but tells me I'm sexy and beautiful and perfect just the way I am? I would like to pick up some weight but it's not an overnight process for me. It happened last month I confronted him about it and he apologized and never made anymore comments about my weight. When he apologized I forgave him but I can't help but to still think about it sometimes because here I am stressed out even more obsessing over my weight trying to stuff down my face! I just want to cry sometimes just thinking about it. Whenever he sees a woman bigger walk by in public he always comments on their bodies saying how nice they are. Why doesn't he do that with me? Not only does he critique my body but my hair too. Today my sister in laws gave me compliments on my hair. But then my husband said "I want her hair to be longer my wife's hair should've been down to the middle of her back by now." I already have shoulder length hair and my hair grows fast but not overnight. I feel like he may have this certain image in his mind on how he wants me to look. My husband doesn't critique my physical appearance everyday but he does it enough to make me feel insecure about myself and our relationship. Could I not be the right one for him? Could he not be attracted to me physically? He says he loves me for all of me and that I'm perfect for him but it doesn't seem like it. It's almost like he's giving me mixed messages.

EASY! (and I DON'T need your husband's sun sign). Get pregnant, you will gain weight, your boobies will get BIG, and he'll bang you every time he looks at your pregnant body/weight. After you had the baby DO NOT breastfeed (you will lose weight), continue to eat breakfast, lunch (don't forget dessert), and dinner at fast food restaurants, drink sodas & from Starbucks every day, and I GUARANTEE you will gain weight 😆

🤗 cyber hugs!

Love,

Eva

He sounds like a shallow wanker

Other than him checking other women out infront of you, I think he is actually doing what women want all men to do, communicate what's wrong.

At times. We as women are always left confused about why things ended.

This man has clearly said what he likes.

Hes communicating his desires.

Have you communicated your desires to him?

Posted by MyStarsShine
He sounds like a shallow wanker

Lol you mad?

Posted by DMV
Other than him checking other women out infront of you, I think he is actually doing what women want all men to do, communicate what's wrong.

At times. We as women are always left confused about why things ended.

This man has clearly said what he likes.

Hes communicating his desires.

Have you communicated your desires to him?

Then why put a ring on it if you don’t like it?

Posted by LadyNeptune

Posted by DMV
Other than him checking other women out infront of you, I think he is actually doing what women want all men to do, communicate what's wrong.

At times. We as women are always left confused about why things ended.

This man has clearly said what he likes.

Hes communicating his desires.

Have you communicated your desires to him?

Then why put a ring on it if you don’t like it?

click to expand

He put a ring on it cause he loves her.

According to her own timeline, she put on weight and it sounds like he really liked it and then she lost weight.

He just want that thick piece of ass back.

Head on over to Krispy kreme and make it happen lol.

Also, everyone's taste change.

What you like today may not be what you like a few years from now.

He probably saw that fatter ass and misses it.

Give the man what he wants.

This is a non issue to be stressed out about.

Now if he said he wants you to get butt implants, that's an issue

Posted by DMV

Posted by LadyNeptune

Posted by DMV
Other than him checking other women out infront of you, I think he is actually doing what women want all men to do, communicate what's wrong.

At times. We as women are always left confused about why things ended.

This man has clearly said what he likes.

Hes communicating his desires.

Have you communicated your desires to him?

Then why put a ring on it if you don’t like it?

He put a ring on it cause he loves her.

According to her own timeline, she put on weight and it sounds like he really liked it and then she lost weight.

He just want that thick piece of ass back.

Head on over to Krispy kreme and make it happen lol.

Also, everyone's taste change.

What you like today may not be what you like a few years from now.

He probably saw that fatter ass and misses it.

Give the man what he wants.

This is a non issue to be stressed out about.

Now if he said he wants you to get butt implants, that's an issue

click to expand

He wants her to get pregnant to gain lbs.

He also is mad her hair isn’t growing fast enough.

Posted by AerialView

Posted by MyStarsShine
He sounds like a shallow wanker

Lol you mad?

click to expand

Haha 😛....no just expressing myself *passionately*

How are you Ariel .. Did you have a good Christmas with Mrs. Stinger? 🙂

Posted by EvatheDiva

Posted by Turquoise
I am currently 5ft4 and 138 pounds. I was just 156 pounds eight months ago. Growing up and until this day I have always had an extreme big appetite and a fast metabolism. My weight always goes up and down because I struggle with depression and on top of that I am on the Nexplanon which messes with my appetite sometimes. I lose weight more easier and faster with minimal effort but gaining weight is always a process for me. Me and my husband are newlyweds and have been married two weeks. Before we got married he told me out of nowhere that he wanted to get me pregnant so that I could pick up some weight and even told me he wanted me to pick up some more weight but tells me I'm sexy and beautiful and perfect just the way I am? I would like to pick up some weight but it's not an overnight process for me. It happened last month I confronted him about it and he apologized and never made anymore comments about my weight. When he apologized I forgave him but I can't help but to still think about it sometimes because here I am stressed out even more obsessing over my weight trying to stuff down my face! I just want to cry sometimes just thinking about it. Whenever he sees a woman bigger walk by in public he always comments on their bodies saying how nice they are. Why doesn't he do that with me? Not only does he critique my body but my hair too. Today my sister in laws gave me compliments on my hair. But then my husband said "I want her hair to be longer my wife's hair should've been down to the middle of her back by now." I already have shoulder length hair and my hair grows fast but not overnight. I feel like he may have this certain image in his mind on how he wants me to look. My husband doesn't critique my physical appearance everyday but he does it enough to make me feel insecure about myself and our relationship. Could I not be the right one for him? Could he not be attracted to me physically? He says he loves me for all of me and that I'm perfect for him but it doesn't seem like it. It's almost like he's giving me mixed messages.

EASY! (and I DON'T need your husband's sun sign). Get pregnant, you will gain weight, your boobies will get BIG, and he'll bang you every time he looks at your pregnant body/weight. After you had the baby DO NOT breastfeed (you will lose weight), continue to eat breakfast, lunch (don't forget dessert), and dinner at fast food restaurants, drink sodas & from Starbucks every day, and I GUARANTEE you will gain weight 😆

🤗 cyber hugs!

Love,

Eva

click to expand

Please DO breastfeed

The baby benefits greatly from breast milk and it is great for the bonding process

Why women put their vanity in front of a baby's health and growth, I will never understand

JFC

😐