@coldwateryvirgo
9 Years500+ PostsVirgo
Is it possible to break up with someone without ever agreeing to break up ?
Yes. A guy ended a 7 month long relationship with me this way. Just stopped calling me and replying to my texts. I took a hint but it hurt because we were talking extensively about our future.
Yes. That's usually the coward's way out - something you see at a person who lacks integrity (or some sense of honor). Mainly through silent treatment or ghosting (the most common forms of emotional abuse - in every type of relationship).
Posted by RooSagicorn
Ghosting... my lovely ex bf did this to me twice. Well I’m calling him ex bf cuz I’ve been down this road with him before. After 8 months first time, and 6 months second & talking future plans. For him, it’s because he has no balls just saying. Oh I mean emotional immaturity & shuts down instead of communicating.
Why did you take him back after the first one? Did he ever explained himself?
Posted by Biboroon
Yes. A guy ended a 7 month long relationship with me this way. Just stopped calling me and replying to my texts. I took a hint but it hurt because we were talking extensively about our future.
How long ago he disappeared?
Posted by neves
Yes. That's usually the coward's way out - something you see at a person who lacks integrity (or some sense of honor). Mainly through silent treatment or ghosting (the most common forms of emotional abuse - in every type of relationship).
I don’t think it’s totally true. People just KNOW they will have to explain themselves and it means they have to lie!
Because saying ‘I don’t love you anymore’ is harsh. Would you consider it less abuse than silence? It’s a hard question.
Because people who are dumped don’t accept being dumped gracefully. No one respect persons rights to not to want to have relashionships anymore. And most of the time it gets ugly, dramatic, violent even.
So what’s the right way? I don’t know. Do you?
Posted by neves
Yes. That's usually the coward's way out - something you see at a person who lacks integrity (or some sense of honor). Mainly through silent treatment or ghosting (the most common forms of emotional abuse - in every type of relationship).I don’t think it’s totally true. People just KNOW they will have to explain themselves and it means they have to lie!
Because saying ‘I don’t love you anymore’ is harsh. Would you consider it less abuse than silence? It’s a hard question.
Because people who are dumped don’t accept being dumped gracefully. No one respect persons rights to not to want to have relashionships anymore. And most of the time it gets ugly, dramatic, violent even.
So what’s the right way? I don’t know. Do you?
click to expand
It's far far far worse - to leave someone confused and just disappear. Unless it's a mutual thing (if both party reached the same conclusion: it just doesn't work anymore) - it's bound to be painful and that's to be expected. But at least, if you know the truth - as painful as it is - you get a chance to heal and move on. Same can't be said about someone who just disappeared (cause again: the coward's way out - is much easier for the one who's least affected - while the harm is far worse for the other party).
Posted by Biboroon
Yes. A guy ended a 7 month long relationship with me this way. Just stopped calling me and replying to my texts. I took a hint but it hurt because we were talking extensively about our future.How long ago he disappeared?
click to expand
At the end of 2016
Posted by neves
Yes. That's usually the coward's way out - something you see at a person who lacks integrity (or some sense of honor). Mainly through silent treatment or ghosting (the most common forms of emotional abuse - in every type of relationship).sometimes people just don't hear you out anymore
you've been trying to tell them but they won't listen
they've checked out off the relationship long ago
and you're on your way out just now
click to expand
If you had "that talk" and you've been clear about it - but he/she dosn't want to accept the truth (reality) - then your hands are clean. But some people - chose the coward's way out - simply because it's easier for them (without stating the real reason - the actual truth / even bluntly put it).
Posted by neves
Yes. That's usually the coward's way out - something you see at a person who lacks integrity (or some sense of honor). Mainly through silent treatment or ghosting (the most common forms of emotional abuse - in every type of relationship).I don’t think it’s totally true. People just KNOW they will have to explain themselves and it means they have to lie!
Because saying ‘I don’t love you anymore’ is harsh. Would you consider it less abuse than silence? It’s a hard question.
Because people who are dumped don’t accept being dumped gracefully. No one respect persons rights to not to want to have relashionships anymore. And most of the time it gets ugly, dramatic, violent even.
So what’s the right way? I don’t know. Do you?
It's far far far worse - to leave someone confuse and just disappear. Unless it's a mutual thing (if both party reached the same conclusion: it just dosn't work anymore) - it's bound to be painful and that's to be expected. But at least, if you know the truth - as painful as it is - you get a chance to heal and move on. Same can't be said about someone who just disappeared (cause again: the coward's way out - is much easier for the one who's least affected - while the harm is far worse for the other party).
click to expand
Your theory only right for 2 sane people who are in rships. Which is small percentage.
Person who gets short end of the deal might react the way they didn’t even know they will react this way!
How many posts have you seen saying ‘he left me, will he come back?’
So it’s TOTAL refusal to let other party to choose freedom! Yes, honey, he left to make more money to buy you an engagement ring...but he didn’t say so you’ll be surprised! NO! He dumped you.
But it’s not obvious to people.
I don’t know how I would choose to be dumped...silently or right in my face!
Darn. I just realized how lucky I am! I had never been thought this shit! Wow!
Posted by Biboroon
Yes. A guy ended a 7 month long relationship with me this way. Just stopped calling me and replying to my texts. I took a hint but it hurt because we were talking extensively about our future.How long ago he disappeared?
At the end of 2016
click to expand
Hon. It’s 2018. Sorry but I am lmao!
Are you still wondering or just posting because?
Posted by Biboroon
Yes. A guy ended a 7 month long relationship with me this way. Just stopped calling me and replying to my texts. I took a hint but it hurt because we were talking extensively about our future.How long ago he disappeared?
At the end of 2016
Hon. It’s 2018. Sorry but I am lmao!
Are you still wondering or just posting because?
click to expand
Lol no I got over him although it took me like half a year to do so. Now I understand why it all happened. I’m just posting for no reason 😀
Posted by Biboroon
Yes. A guy ended a 7 month long relationship with me this way. Just stopped calling me and replying to my texts. I took a hint but it hurt because we were talking extensively about our future.How long ago he disappeared?
At the end of 2016
Hon. It’s 2018. Sorry but I am lmao!
Are you still wondering or just posting because?
Lol no I got over him although it took me like half a year to do so. Now I understand why it all happened. I’m just posting for no reason 😀
click to expand
Why it happened?
Posted by neves
Yes. That's usually the coward's way out - something you see at a person who lacks integrity (or some sense of honor). Mainly through silent treatment or ghosting (the most common forms of emotional abuse - in every type of relationship).I don’t think it’s totally true. People just KNOW they will have to explain themselves and it means they have to lie!
Because saying ‘I don’t love you anymore’ is harsh. Would you consider it less abuse than silence? It’s a hard question.
Because people who are dumped don’t accept being dumped gracefully. No one respect persons rights to not to want to have relashionships anymore. And most of the time it gets ugly, dramatic, violent even.
So what’s the right way? I don’t know. Do you?
It's far far far worse - to leave someone confuse and just disappear. Unless it's a mutual thing (if both party reached the same conclusion: it just dosn't work anymore) - it's bound to be painful and that's to be expected. But at least, if you know the truth - as painful as it is - you get a chance to heal and move on. Same can't be said about someone who just disappeared (cause again: the coward's way out - is much easier for the one who's least affected - while the harm is far worse for the other party).
Your theory only right for 2 sane people who are in rships. Which is small percentage.
Person who gets short end of the deal might react the way they didn’t even know they will react this way!
How many posts have you seen saying ‘he left me, will he come back?
click to expand
Honestly, on DXP alone... i lost count. I'm tired of seeing so many topics with this subject. HouseCleaning (if you remember that guy) - made a topic for each sign on this subject ("insert astro-sign" here left me...).
Posted by neves
Yes. That's usually the coward's way out - something you see at a person who lacks integrity (or some sense of honor). Mainly through silent treatment or ghosting (the most common forms of emotional abuse - in every type of relationship).I don’t think it’s totally true. People just KNOW they will have to explain themselves and it means they have to lie!
Because saying ‘I don’t love you anymore’ is harsh. Would you consider it less abuse than silence? It’s a hard question.
Because people who are dumped don’t accept being dumped gracefully. No one respect persons rights to not to want to have relashionships anymore. And most of the time it gets ugly, dramatic, violent even.
So what’s the right way? I don’t know. Do you?
It's far far far worse - to leave someone confuse and just disappear. Unless it's a mutual thing (if both party reached the same conclusion: it just dosn't work anymore) - it's bound to be painful and that's to be expected. But at least, if you know the truth - as painful as it is - you get a chance to heal and move on. Same can't be said about someone who just disappeared (cause again: the coward's way out - is much easier for the one who's least affected - while the harm is far worse for the other party).
Your theory only right for 2 sane people who are in rships. Which is small percentage.
Person who gets short end of the deal might react the way they didn’t even know they will react this way!
How many posts have you seen saying ‘he left me, will he come back?
Honestly, on DXP alone... i lost count. I'm tired of seeing so many topics with this subject. HouseCleaning (if you remember that guy) - made a topic for each sign on this subject ("insert astro-sign" here left me...).
click to expand
That’s why they quietly grab theirs clothes on a middle of the night and disappearing barefooted in a dark...lol
Posted by Biboroon
Yes. A guy ended a 7 month long relationship with me this way. Just stopped calling me and replying to my texts. I took a hint but it hurt because we were talking extensively about our future.How long ago he disappeared?
At the end of 2016
Hon. It’s 2018. Sorry but I am lmao!
Are you still wondering or just posting because?
Lol no I got over him although it took me like half a year to do so. Now I understand why it all happened. I’m just posting for no reason 😀
Why it happened?
click to expand
Because he had (probably still does) some deep seated issues with himself that I had no control over and I was too young/immature to handle it all
people do this coward shit way too much. how hard is it to just communicate that you're done? if this is just a regular relationship that has just gone boring, do the right thing and verbally tell them it's over.
Posted by Biboroon
Yes. A guy ended a 7 month long relationship with me this way. Just stopped calling me and replying to my texts. I took a hint but it hurt because we were talking extensively about our future.How long ago he disappeared?
At the end of 2016
Hon. It’s 2018. Sorry but I am lmao!
Are you still wondering or just posting because?
Lol no I got over him although it took me like half a year to do so. Now I understand why it all happened. I’m just posting for no reason 😀
Why it happened?
Because he had (probably still does) some deep seated issues with himself that I had no control over and I was too young/immature to handle it all
click to expand
So good for you!
And have you tried to contact him or you both went silent and done?
Posted by Biboroon
Yes. A guy ended a 7 month long relationship with me this way. Just stopped calling me and replying to my texts. I took a hint but it hurt because we were talking extensively about our future.How long ago he disappeared?
At the end of 2016
Hon. It’s 2018. Sorry but I am lmao!
Are you still wondering or just posting because?
Lol no I got over him although it took me like half a year to do so. Now I understand why it all happened. I’m just posting for no reason 😀
Why it happened?
Because he had (probably still does) some deep seated issues with himself that I had no control over and I was too young/immature to handle it all
So good for you!
And have you tried to contact him or you both went silent and done?
click to expand
The last month we were together I noticed he was distant and I was always the one to call him, so one day I sent him a text to clear things out and he never replied. It was the last time I contacted him and and I don’t intend to do it ever again because he’s not worth my time anymore.
Posted by Biboroon
Yes. A guy ended a 7 month long relationship with me this way. Just stopped calling me and replying to my texts. I took a hint but it hurt because we were talking extensively about our future.How long ago he disappeared?
At the end of 2016
Hon. It’s 2018. Sorry but I am lmao!
Are you still wondering or just posting because?
Lol no I got over him although it took me like half a year to do so. Now I understand why it all happened. I’m just posting for no reason 😀
Why it happened?
Because he had (probably still does) some deep seated issues with himself that I had no control over and I was too young/immature to handle it all
You can’t handle it. They have to want to work on their issues. I know what my ex’s are, but that didn’t help the second time around. I couldn’t stop it from happening. Believe me I tried. Best to leave them alone to either figure their shit out or keep repeating their pattern. Nothing you can do.
click to expand
Exactly. I tried so hard to be by his side and help him but if someone doesn’t want help it’s useless to try to give it to them.
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Like somehow you just stop talking to each other much and drift apart and not talk to each other anymore
And you just deemed that relationship is over without talk about it