@leejt86
13 YearsVirgo
When will she bring her guard down? what can i do?
Will a Leo Woman's Guard Come Down and How to Approach Her
A Leo woman with a guarded past may take time to trust and open up. Showing patience, consistency, and genuine kindness can help her feel safe. Respect her boundaries and give her space to heal. Over time, her trust may grow, allowing her to let her guard down naturally.
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You are obviously, seriously deluded.
You say she is a model, and you say that that is you in your avatar .... which means, she's likely a nine, and you're a 4 at best.
People of feathers flock together, and that includes looks.
You don't have a chance in hell with a beautiful woman of the model magnitude ..... and you are either to egotistical that you've rendered yourself blinded to the truth ... or just na??ve as fuck.
Do yourself a favor and step away before you get hurt.
* so
The only reason she has her guard up around you is because she probably senses you sniffing around ... creepy
Posted by leejt86
So as you all know im in love with a leo woman.Im at the point where I dont know how to move forward. She has been hurt a lot in the past so she has her guard up and wont let anyone get close, at all. Will she ever let her guard down and let me get close? Is there anything i can do? Or is she going to push me away because she doesnt want to get hurt?
She's a leo female. She's a lost cause until she decides she wants to change.
Move on. You deserve to use your valuable time on someone who deserves it. This one doesn't deserve it until she decides to grow up and face her demons.
True, she could be a 7 or 8 ... but, for the fact that she's a model AND a Leo, it's likely that she carries herself as a 9 or 10.
Irregardless ......
She has been hurt a lot in the past so she has her guard up and wont let anyone get close, at all.
Unless you are every person she has contact with, you really have no clue if she lets anyone get close to her.
You are so stuck within a fantasy ... that you're completely blind to the reality of the situation. What a strange Virgo you are. Your Neptune must be all fucked up.
She was my date to my friend's engagement party. She's even had dinner with my parents.
But she also teases me a lot, its playful. She always says I should shave my beard.
She gets embarrassed easily around me.
Posted by leejt86
She was my date to my friend's engagement party. She's even had dinner with my parents.But she also teases me a lot, its playful. She always says I should shave my beard.
She gets embarrassed easily around me.
Okay. It's possible that she is not looking for a relationship right now. Sometimes being single is a relief. Strange but true. The ball is in her court either way. Be careful about emotionally investing in this woman until you are sure that you are on the same page. If she is showing some interest though you shouldn't just give up. Just don't be too pushy about it.
click to expand
You should read his other threads about this chick.
Posted by feby16aqua
It's not supposed to be this hard. It flows or it doesn't...naturally. What kind of model is she?
This.
He's just pining over a crush that he can't have. We've all been there. We want to see something that isn't there when we like someone and wish it would work out.
so looks like its not going to happen. we had a talk, let it all out, and its not meant to be.
she doesnt feel the same way i do.
She said we cant hang out anymore because its too "weird" for her knowing i feel the way I do. Yet when I told her a month a go how i felt she said we can still be friends and "i shouldnt feel weird about it because she doesnt".
So im wondering, what changed in the past month?
what bothers me the most is this.
she flat out said "i dont want you to like me because i dont like you like that"
What kind of person says something like that?
Posted by leejt86
what bothers me the most is this.she flat out said "i dont want you to like me because i dont like you like that"
What kind of person says something like that?
I've said that sentiment at least once in my life.
There are times when hints don't work — it's got to be stated more clearly.
Kind of like I said in another thread, when a guy says that he's not relationship material.
Posted by leejt86
what bothers me the most is this.she flat out said "i dont want you to like me because i dont like you like that"
What kind of person says something like that?
Not as rare as you think. If she doesn't like you that way, your affection is likely smothering and annoying to her. I'd say that to someone who is not getting the hint. I don't like to lead people on and waste their time.
Nope I'm not. I'm ignoring her, keeping myself distracted.
A day after we had the talk, her friend msged me on Facebook telling me to back off. I thought high school was done
Sigh....
Posted by leejt86
what bothers me the most is this.she flat out said "i dont want you to like me because i dont like you like that"
What kind of person says something like that?
What more can be said when you just haven't been getting the hint all this time? The only people here that were encouraging you were the misogynist douches who were all HUR YEAH SEXORS HER, and the dumb chicks who live in the clouds.
If you have to ponder, question, and analyze every single thing about a person's actions to see if there's a tiny glimmer of hope that they're interested, they aren't interested. It's pretty obvious when someone is interested. You can pick up on it very easily.
Posted by leejt86
Nope I'm not. I'm ignoring her, keeping myself distracted.A day after we had the talk, her friend msged me on Facebook telling me to back off. I thought high school was done
Sigh....
click to expand
Also, if you're getting this type of reaction from her friend, then what kind of vibe are you really sending off? We're only hearing your side, and seeing that her friend is doing this tells me one of two things- they are indeed "high school," or you're doing something you're not telling us about that warrants such a response.
Given what you've said here and how you refuse to listen to any logical advice, no offense, but I do wonder if it's the latter. Just sayin'.
Either way, good luck dealing with all this. We've all been there and it sucks when you like someone and it's not reciprocated. Keep busy and go no contact with them for awhile.
I didnt do anything creepy or weird as she claims i did. All i did was show her affection and she was overwhelmed by it. I may have come on too strong, thats my fault, but nothing else.
I didnt do anything creepy or weird as she claims i did. All i did was show her affection and she was overwhelmed by it. I may have come on too strong, thats my fault, but nothing else.
Is there a chance she will come back? She said we can't be friends until I move on.
Or is there no point in hoping she will come back?
Oh Please!
She's a Leo Sun Scorpio Moon. The moment she felt pressured to make a decision, she backed off and he became undesirable (boring even). He didn't hold any appeal... he ruined the lioness's "stalk."
It has nothing to do with logical advice or something he's doing.
We're a masculine sign that go for what we want. We hunt - the minute our prey jumps in head first, the appeal is lost.
Too easily caught, too easily lost.
No, I don't doubt she's handled it like an idiot. That alone explains a lot. But like I said, we're only hearing one side and these snippets he's given kinda tell something else. Example being the recent post- "I didn't do anything creepy or as weird as she claims I did." Again, tells me he's coming off differently than he says here.
He admits to coming on too strong (showing too much "affection," and that will always result in disaster with any woman, especially if it was already established she didn't feel that way, but he did. He was pushing when she made herself clear. Most women will either get turned off or creeped out depending on how he handles it.
The entire point is that he needs to pay attention to what's really happening and stop living in his head. LOGIC does prevail here, which none was used by him. He continued to see what he wanted to see and it ended up being too much for her.
I do think how she handled it (from what he said) was immature and ridiculous. Sounds like a silly bitch who has no idea what she wants and goes back on things she said. It seems a lot of Leo women have a few screws loose when it comes to dating and relating- kinda all over the place and it sets things up for disaster.
OP- Until you stop stessing about her coming back or not will be when you have moved on. You're infatuated with this woman. Once you get busy and your thoughts aren't entirely consumed by "ifs" and "whens" about this chick, you will probably be able to handle the situation better. Honestly, who cares if she comes back or not? She doesn't sound like a very nice individual and you could do better than her.
Also, OP, what do you mean by "affection?"
Oh Please!
She's a Leo Sun Scorpio Moon. The moment she felt pressured to make a decision, she backed off and he became undesirable (boring even). He didn't hold any appeal... he ruined the lioness's "stalk."
It has nothing to do with logical advice or something he's doing.
Needed to point this out too because it makes you sound a bit off-
So you're saying ASTROLOGY wins out over logic and common sense? Because she's a LEO it's why she lost interest and not the fact that many here noticed the telltale signs of a female not interested?
Some of you guys take this astrology stuff too far sometimes. I think it can be helpful at times, but to state that it prevails over what was concluded based on actions and behaviors is a little much.
The fact remains that regardless of sign, the chick was not interested and he was almost trying to force something to happen. He was almost pulling a "nice" guy move here, tbh.
Overall, I don't think anyone was the bad guy here either but it was just a situation poorly handled by both parties.
Posted by rockyroadicecream
Also, OP, what do you mean by "affection?"
I sent her roses on her birthday.
I told her i cared about her, i would send her texts calling her beautiful and things like that.
What bothers me is, why would she invite me out to hang out, run errands, etc, if it was too "weird for her". She invited me out last week. And I dont mean me initiating it i mean her texting me "hey do you want to go with me to...."
how was that not "weird" for her
Posted by Jynja
Rocky, the fact of the matter is that Leos love the chase.Astrology or fantasy or logic, a Leo likes the thrill of a chase. If he hadn't gone at her directly, she could have been wondering about him now.
If astrology doesn't explain behaviors, what are we studying? When you pull your natal chart on cafeastrology, why do you read the short profile? It explains behavior. It might not determine situation, but it says that Leo women are one way, and Arieses are another way.
ALL the Arian logic in the world won't change a Leo's natal profile.
Deal, don't deal. Whine, don't whine. I told him she'll back off from him if he goes at her the way he did, and she did.
Astrology or logic... whatever explains that... your pick.
You illustrated my point perfectly. Thanks. 🙂
Aaand several of us pointed out that she's not interested and this won't work.
Look what's happened!
Also, you're a fucking fool for perpetuating the whole game playing/avoidant bullshit. His being direct was the best thing for him. Why? Now he knows where he really stands with her because she had to be direct herself for him to finally get it. This whole evasive/indirect bullshit is for teenagers. If someone is so unstable and flighty that a simple question for clarity in a situation like this will "scare" them off, then they obviously aren't relationship material let alone the right person for you.
When you really want to know what's going on in a situation, ask. Fucking duh.
Posted by rockyroadicecream
Also, OP, what do you mean by "affection?"I sent her roses on her birthday.
I told her i cared about her, i would send her texts calling her beautiful and things like that.
What bothers me is, why would she invite me out to hang out, run errands, etc, if it was too "weird for her". She invited me out last week. And I dont mean me initiating it i mean her texting me "hey do you want to go with me to...."
how was that not "weird" for her
click to expand
When someone has established that they just want to be friends, there's a difference between just hanging out, and the romantic implications of roses (which is a nice gesture overall) and telling her she's beautiful/sending flattering texts. If I had a guy friend who did that to me, I'd be kinda uncomfortable too. I think your texts were what made it all overkill, tbh.
You basically continued to act like she was a romantic interest and not a friend. You overstepped the line and didn't respect her assertion about this entire thing being just friends. It wasn't intentional, but you gotta learn how to control yourself. The gestures are all very nice but meant for someone whom you're dating/have a romantic relationship with.
So this is Arian logic? SMH
I told him not to pressure her. Not to come across as a bumbling idiot. See what listening to bumbling idiots has done to him.
Hahahaha... how interesting.
Sweetheart, his actions are what pressured her/freaked her out, not being direct. Apparently that was just icing on the cake, based on what he just told us.
You're an asshole too, btw. What the hell is wrong with you by telling this nice guy that he's "weak?" Regale us of your tales of how Leo women work, but you're just showing that you guys are a bunch of dicks and cannot handle nice guys. You find them "weak." Based on your logic, you like dramatic douchebags for relationship prospects?
You are essentially perpetuating all the dating issues in everything you've said so far. - Play games, don't be nice/don't be yourself, don't ask questions because it'll scurr her away. WHY? Why the fuck would you do that??
Getting worked up over anything Tiz says isn't worth the effort, Jynja. His speciality is shit stirring.
Omg this website is a pos
*oblivious
Btw, Tiz, you're a total piece of work. For the mass quantities of posts that you've racked up in such a short time, you sure as hell don't have much to add to anything. All you do is encourage enabling and you know damned well if this post was a female in this bind, you'd tell her to stick it out.
Boo hoo, my advice is looking out for their best interest. It's not "run away," it's "don't let yourself be used and treated like shit by some douche." In case your feeble mind hasn't noticed, this is a site where people come to get advice on problems. Many of these problems are issues that have long been going on and the person involved is getting treated like shit. Mostly women. Women are all too often putting up with a lot of bullshit from your kind- the very same kind you look out for over the female when it comes to advice. I've said it before and I'll say it again- I am not the only one who's noticed. It's not a coincidence when I've had several EXPERIENCED women tell me the same thing.
That said, my whole "fuck it and move on bit" is usually warranted. Why? Because the female in question, sadly a good portion of the time, has already sacrificed too many emotions, time, and effort and the guy is taking advantage of that. THIS IS HOW OUR SOCIETY IS SET UP oh clueless one. I will never expect you to understand because you are male. Males do not understand what it is like to be a female in dating. Men like you con women out of all the power that they hold by telling them to accept the utter bullshit that is perpetuated by clueless females and guys like you.
So you can kindly fuck off. If you want to disagree with my advice, fine. At least mine looks out for the female's best interest. Your's is just shit stirring and fence sitting for shits n giggles. She can stick around if she pleases and work some fucked up situation out to her heart's content. But the goal of my posts is to make sure that these girls learn some freaking bravery when it comes to shitty guys and empower themselves to know better. Too many people are chasing after relationships to solve inner issues that can only be fixed by self reflection and probably some therapy.
I find it so freaking sad that you can never see the big picture, especially since you like to come across like some intellectual brooding type on these forums.
From what I have read you:
-Developed a crush on the girl
-Chased her a bit and got nowhere
-Told her directly of your feelings for her
-She told you directly that she wasn't interested but would like to remain friends
-She, trying to stick to her promise of friendship invited you out as friends to with each other
-You then disregarded her previous statement as if she wasn't capable of knowing her own mind
-Upped your game so that you could persuade her to come to her senses and change her mind to your way of thinking
-She now has cut off contact with you and has had to resort to getting her friend to tell you this because she now sees that you don't respect her to know her own mind or make her own decisions.
I have been in a similar situation with a couple of men over the years, in one instance he was a friend and he expressed interest but I wasn't interested in him romantically. He started to go a bit overboard so like your lady in question I told him directly that I wasn't interested in that way — having been friends previous to this I said, and we agreed, that we should remain friends. We still are friends, very good ones — the reason for this is because he respected what I said and didn't continue to try to win me or change my mind. Whether he still harbours those feelings for me or not I don't know, for me it's not an issue - for him? who knows? But he is respectful enough of me to believe me when I said what I said and, more importantly, respectful enough of himself to not chase after someone who clearly doesn't want him in that way.
The other guy, went so far as to pat me on the head once with regards to it, and told me I would eventually change my mind, that he knew we were meant to be??_. I don't know what he is doing these days; I haven't seen him since then (my decision)
When someone tells you of a decision they have made you need to respect it and show them respect by doing so. There is nothing wrong, and everything nice, about a man showing his interest in a woman and attempting to pursue her as you initially appeared to do, there is everything wrong about a man who doesn't take no for an answer.
You have made the most sense out of any other poster on this thread.
I should have moved on when she told me she didnt feel the same way a month ago. But I didn't listen and got myself hurt over and over.
My thinking was we didn't know each other as well as we thought and if I let her get to know me she would give me a chance.
Posted by leejt86
@celticlionessI should have moved on when she told me she didnt feel the same way a month ago. But I didn't listen and got myself hurt over and over.
My thinking was we didn't know each other as well as we thought and if I let her get to know me she would give me a chance.
You were told you would get hurt ... you refused to listen.
You were told you never had a chance ... you refused to listen.
so long as you don't accept responsibility for your own actions ... you will continue to step into the same pile of shit.
I should have moved on when she told me she didnt feel the same way a month ago. But I didn't listen and got myself hurt over and over.
You only think about yourself here and YOUR own feelings ^^^^^^^ ......
.... meanwhile, during that month you stalked her. You sent her flowers, you kept tabs on her, you constantly sent forwardly aggressive texts.
And nowhere in anything you've said here have you acknowledge your bad for that. You don't seem to have any awareness that she you likely scared the fuck out her, considering she had to sic a friend on you to leave her alone.
You have zero awareness that your actions were wrong against her well being ..... you only think of yourself, and your pain, and your self pity.
You're seriously accusing me of stalking her? Get over yourself
Posted by IrresistableScorp
^^ I called bullshit on him weeks ago. Lol. 😛Honestly. I think P Angel is right. He's one of those perverted Virgies with a fetish for talking about models or some other kink.
um yeah you would be wrong on that
Update on the situation:
I apologized for not backing off when i should have and she forgave me. We both agreed some time apart from each other was a good idea.
So maybe we'll be friends again some day, but I have to move on first.
Posted by leejt86
@celticlionessYou have made the most sense out of any other poster on this thread.
I should have moved on when she told me she didnt feel the same way a month ago. But I didn't listen and got myself hurt over and over.
My thinking was we didn't know each other as well as we thought and if I let her get to know me she would give me a chance.
And you thought a month was "enough time" to convince her?
Maybe P-Devil has a point.
hmmmmmm
click to expand
Well if I had any bit of a chance I blew it by being too intense.
No point in trying anymore.
Posted by feby16aqua
GG what in the world are you talking about? Ok. They are NOT friends—? Why do you assume and speak before you know the truth.
HAHA he must be fucking new if he thinks we're best buds. Anyone on the Libra board knows the answer to that question.
I spoke up against Jynja because what she was saying was way off and directing the poor OP in the wrong direction and leading him to believe he had a chance in a hopeless situation (one where he had everything to lose either way). CL summarized it all perfectly and that is EXACTLY what's happened here. I've been in the same spot before with guys as well and could tell from a mile away where this was headed.
OP, I don't think you're pervy, just a nice guy who's misdirecting all this energy into the wrong person and in the wrong way. I think you just have some emotional growing up to do a bit. I'd expect this from guys in their early 20s. It'd be nice to see you eventually settle down with a chick who deserves to be treated how you're willing to treat your lady.
...this bitch just wasn't it. :/
Someone should masturbate more.... *cough*
Nah, I'm good. I have more to life than obsessing over this website like you do, apparently.
You might find masturbation more worthy of wasting time on. Just sayin'.
I have never mentioned your name in any private message to geminicandle.
As much as I am fond of GC, we never spoke in private at all until about a week ago about something completely unrelated to this website.
Quite often, GC says that she talks to people in PM's, and those same people come in to say that they didn't tell her what she says they said. This happens nearly daily.
Purr does the same thing ... she also lies about PM's to attempt to gain credibility.
Posted by Superseven
And tiz, you talk weird bro lol. I've always wanted to tell you that. I've showed you respect through out all of this. I need you to do the same so all this "you're not the sharpest" or "if you wanted to act stupid" comments needs to be brought down to a minimum cause you're only exciting my demons broski. I'm calling a truse, so there's no need for any more of your dumb ass metaphors. I'm not mad and never was so let's move on here.
Says a lot if you're faded and still can't understand what he's talking about, haha.
Posted by scorchedearth
i hate when someone i have blocked talks shit about me and someone quotes it.
troof
lol, and people wonder why I have no issues with blocking when necessary.
People be teh crazies. Ain't nobody got time for that shit.
I have never mentioned your name in any private message to geminicandle.
As much as I am fond of GC, we never spoke in private at all until about a week ago about something completely unrelated to this website.
Quite often, GC says that she talks to people in PM's, and those same people come in to say that they didn't tell her what she says they said. This happens nearly daily.
Purr does the same thing ... she also lies about PM's to attempt to gain credibility.
click to expand
Uh, no.
She did and she's back with more ssss..
You've been around for the longest time...aren't you going to self destruct again soon?? 😛
Oh dear...what will you be reincarnated as this time??
Drop the queer look though...can't take you seriously in that get up! 😛
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So as you all know im in love with a leo woman.
Im at the point where I dont know how to move forward. She has been hurt a lot in the past so she has her guard up and wont let anyone get close, at all. Will she ever let her guard down and let me get close? Is there anything i can do? Or is she going to push me away because she doesnt want to get hurt?