Opinions? (Page 2)

Signed Up: Jan 16, 2016
Comments: 15 · Posts: 3089 · Topics: 64

Posted by EnochtheWise
Posted by shaymaci
Posted by PhoenixRising
Posted by shaymaci
Posted by PhoenixRising
Posted by shaymaci
I'll try. It's like walking on eggshells concerning his emotions.

Hmmmm. Can you elaborate please. Are you referring to opening up to you when he needs space, or is it hard to tell him how his actions make you feel?

How long does he take space and how is it causing emotional neglect?

He gets very sensitive about shit. I feel like if I say the wrong thing, he will close up.

If I want us closer, it irritates him.

And I mean closer emotionally, which is what I need, talking about things for the future.

I asked him where he saw himself in 5 years, that apparently is a no.

Hmmm, well forgive me for stating this but it sounds like you two may be talking a different language. working towards being "emotionally close" and talking about "the future" are different things. At least it is for me. One speaks to vulnerability, letting you know my heart, fears, desires and hope (more Scorp focus) and the other speaks to security (more Virgo focus). Now discussions about the future may be synonymous with emotional closeness for a you...but maybe not for him?

That may be the issue. Do you think he may be feeling like you don't trust he'll be around in the future so he's irritated with the doubt? If you're pushing a conversation about the future he may be wondering why that is.

I don't push conversations with him because I know he's defensive. I usually give up talking about some things altogether.

I don't like arguing. Neither does he.

But misunderstandings cause them.

And him getting defensive causes them.

I literally have to let him know that I'm not attacking him, not to take anything so personally.

And they aren't even offensive sentences ?
may be a little off topic but this is one are where I have trouble with my relationships with virgos.....am a scorp with venus in virgo and asc. virgo also....I do get along really well with them, but when it comes to relationships its almost like we are too similar, I think the criticism and the defensiveness/sensitivity to criticism goes both ways so really hard for either side to really be themselves, and express all the critical things they are feeling....discussions often devolve into blame shifting and arguments, neither side budging so you get no real resolution....
click to expand

I usually just give in and sacrifice the things I need rather than argue.

He doesn't pick up on how I feel.

I don't expect him to.

I don't nag or criticize, I keep everything to myself. Behind my wall.

Signed Up: Jan 16, 2016
Comments: 15 · Posts: 3089 · Topics: 64

Posted by EnochtheWise
Posted by shaymaci
Posted by EnochtheWise
Posted by shaymaci
Posted by PhoenixRising
Posted by shaymaci
Posted by PhoenixRising
Posted by shaymaci
I'll try. It's like walking on eggshells concerning his emotions.

Hmmmm. Can you elaborate please. Are you referring to opening up to you when he needs space, or is it hard to tell him how his actions make you feel?

How long does he take space and how is it causing emotional neglect?

He gets very sensitive about shit. I feel like if I say the wrong thing, he will close up.

If I want us closer, it irritates him.

And I mean closer emotionally, which is what I need, talking about things for the future.

I asked him where he saw himself in 5 years, that apparently is a no.

Hmmm, well forgive me for stating this but it sounds like you two may be talking a different language. working towards being "emotionally close" and talking about "the future" are different things. At least it is for me. One speaks to vulnerability, letting you know my heart, fears, desires and hope (more Scorp focus) and the other speaks to security (more Virgo focus). Now discussions about the future may be synonymous with emotional closeness for a you...but maybe not for him?

That may be the issue. Do you think he may be feeling like you don't trust he'll be around in the future so he's irritated with the doubt? If you're pushing a conversation about the future he may be wondering why that is.

I don't push conversations with him because I know he's defensive. I usually give up talking about some things altogether.

I don't like arguing. Neither does he.

But misunderstandings cause them.

And him getting defensive causes them.

I literally have to let him know that I'm not attacking him, not to take anything so personally.

And they aren't even offensive sentences ?
may be a little off topic but this is one are where I have trouble with my relationships with virgos.....am a scorp with venus in virgo and asc. virgo also....I do get along really well with them, but when it comes to relationships its almost like we are too similar, I think the criticism and the defensiveness/sensitivity to criticism goes both ways so really hard for either side to really be themselves, and express all the critical things they are feeling....discussions often devolve into blame shifting and arguments, neither side budging so you get no real resolution....
I usually just give in and sacrifice the things I need rather than argue.

He doesn't pick up on how I feel.

I don't expect him to.

I don't nag or criticize, I keep everything to myself. Behind my wall.
yeah my venus usually dies for their sins over and over again in early phases of relationship.....then eventually gets fed up and turns cold for not getting the recognition/worship it clearly earned.....
click to expand

Yet my 12th house Venus is the epitome of devotion and service. I love to do so. I'm submissive, and take care of his needs as if they were my own.

Signed Up: May 08, 2017
Comments: 480 · Posts: 3567 · Topics: 13

Posted by EnochtheWise
Posted by shaymaci
Posted by PhoenixRising
Posted by shaymaci
Posted by PhoenixRising
Posted by shaymaci
I'll try. It's like walking on eggshells concerning his emotions.

Hmmmm. Can you elaborate please. Are you referring to opening up to you when he needs space, or is it hard to tell him how his actions make you feel?

How long does he take space and how is it causing emotional neglect?

He gets very sensitive about shit. I feel like if I say the wrong thing, he will close up.

If I want us closer, it irritates him.

And I mean closer emotionally, which is what I need, talking about things for the future.

I asked him where he saw himself in 5 years, that apparently is a no.

Hmmm, well forgive me for stating this but it sounds like you two may be talking a different language. working towards being "emotionally close" and talking about "the future" are different things. At least it is for me. One speaks to vulnerability, letting you know my heart, fears, desires and hope (more Scorp focus) and the other speaks to security (more Virgo focus). Now discussions about the future may be synonymous with emotional closeness for a you...but maybe not for him?

That may be the issue. Do you think he may be feeling like you don't trust he'll be around in the future so he's irritated with the doubt? If you're pushing a conversation about the future he may be wondering why that is.

I don't push conversations with him because I know he's defensive. I usually give up talking about some things altogether.

I don't like arguing. Neither does he.

But misunderstandings cause them.

And him getting defensive causes them.

I literally have to let him know that I'm not attacking him, not to take anything so personally.

And they aren't even offensive sentences ?
may be a little off topic but this is one are where I have trouble with my relationships with virgos.....am a scorp with venus in virgo and asc. virgo also....I do get along really well with them, but when it comes to relationships its almost like we are too similar, I think the criticism and the defensiveness/sensitivity to criticism goes both ways so really hard for either side to really be themselves, and express all the critical things they are feeling....discussions often devolve into blame shifting and arguments, neither side budging so you get no real resolution....
click to expand

I can see your point, but one of the things about dating scorps that I like the most is the level of comfort

without feeling the need to criticize or argue because it was so effortless. Perhaps that caused a lack of true communication?

Who knows? Where is your mercury @EnochtheWise?

Signed Up: Jan 16, 2016
Comments: 15 · Posts: 3089 · Topics: 64

Posted by EnochtheWise
Posted by shaymaci
Posted by EnochtheWise
Posted by shaymaci
Posted by EnochtheWise
Posted by shaymaci
Posted by PhoenixRising
Posted by shaymaci
Posted by PhoenixRising
Posted by shaymaci
I'll try. It's like walking on eggshells concerning his emotions.

Hmmmm. Can you elaborate please. Are you referring to opening up to you when he needs space, or is it hard to tell him how his actions make you feel?

How long does he take space and how is it causing emotional neglect?

He gets very sensitive about shit. I feel like if I say the wrong thing, he will close up.

If I want us closer, it irritates him.

And I mean closer emotionally, which is what I need, talking about things for the future.

I asked him where he saw himself in 5 years, that apparently is a no.

Hmmm, well forgive me for stating this but it sounds like you two may be talking a different language. working towards being "emotionally close" and talking about "the future" are different things. At least it is for me. One speaks to vulnerability, letting you know my heart, fears, desires and hope (more Scorp focus) and the other speaks to security (more Virgo focus). Now discussions about the future may be synonymous with emotional closeness for a you...but maybe not for him?

That may be the issue. Do you think he may be feeling like you don't trust he'll be around in the future so he's irritated with the doubt? If you're pushing a conversation about the future he may be wondering why that is.

I don't push conversations with him because I know he's defensive. I usually give up talking about some things altogether.

I don't like arguing. Neither does he.

But misunderstandings cause them.

And him getting defensive causes them.

I literally have to let him know that I'm not attacking him, not to take anything so personally.

And they aren't even offensive sentences ?
may be a little off topic but this is one are where I have trouble with my relationships with virgos.....am a scorp with venus in virgo and asc. virgo also....I do get along really well with them, but when it comes to relationships its almost like we are too similar, I think the criticism and the defensiveness/sensitivity to criticism goes both ways so really hard for either side to really be themselves, and express all the critical things they are feeling....discussions often devolve into blame shifting and arguments, neither side budging so you get no real resolution....
I usually just give in and sacrifice the things I need rather than argue.

He doesn't pick up on how I feel.

I don't expect him to.

I don't nag or criticize, I keep everything to myself. Behind my wall.
yeah my venus usually dies for their sins over and over again in early phases of relationship.....then eventually gets fed up and turns cold for not getting the recognition/worship it clearly earned.....
Yet my 12th house Venus is the epitome of devotion and service. I love to do so. I'm submissive, and take care of his needs as if they were my own.

I understand, believe me....the scariest part of getting into a relationship for me is that I know its when I'm at my most Virgo...lol...at the end of the day though, it can't be one-sided, and that's a huge trap I have to watch out for myself and know to avoid now....at some point when the euphoria of having that worthy object of affection/devotion wanes just a tad in light of the latest way my partner has unknowingly impaled my overly sensitive heart, I start making lists of what this person actually does for me besides just filling the role of betrayer in my ongoing narrative of martyrdom....do you do anything for me besides inspire me to make my life revolve around you and supporting you in every way? do you support/encourage/build up/compliment me in any way? know me at all? care to? usually nah....lol....that is when I realize I'm trapped in my own dysfunction, beyond just having a shit Venus placement....
click to expand

Using the Virgo Venus logic to save yourself and your heart. Nice.

My scorpio Venus doesn't ??

Signed Up: Jan 16, 2016
Comments: 15 · Posts: 3089 · Topics: 64

Posted by EnochtheWise
Posted by shaymaci
Posted by EnochtheWise
Posted by shaymaci
Posted by EnochtheWise
Posted by shaymaci
Posted by EnochtheWise
Posted by shaymaci
Posted by PhoenixRising
Posted by shaymaci
Posted by PhoenixRising
Posted by shaymaci
I'll try. It's like walking on eggshells concerning his emotions.

Hmmmm. Can you elaborate please. Are you referring to opening up to you when he needs space, or is it hard to tell him how his actions make you feel?

How long does he take space and how is it causing emotional neglect?

He gets very sensitive about shit. I feel like if I say the wrong thing, he will close up.

If I want us closer, it irritates him.

And I mean closer emotionally, which is what I need, talking about things for the future.

I asked him where he saw himself in 5 years, that apparently is a no.

Hmmm, well forgive me for stating this but it sounds like you two may be talking a different language. working towards being "emotionally close" and talking about "the future" are different things. At least it is for me. One speaks to vulnerability, letting you know my heart, fears, desires and hope (more Scorp focus) and the other speaks to security (more Virgo focus). Now discussions about the future may be synonymous with emotional closeness for a you...but maybe not for him?

That may be the issue. Do you think he may be feeling like you don't trust he'll be around in the future so he's irritated with the doubt? If you're pushing a conversation about the future he may be wondering why that is.

I don't push conversations with him because I know he's defensive. I usually give up talking about some things altogether.

I don't like arguing. Neither does he.

But misunderstandings cause them.

And him getting defensive causes them.

I literally have to let him know that I'm not attacking him, not to take anything so personally.

And they aren't even offensive sentences ?
may be a little off topic but this is one are where I have trouble with my relationships with virgos.....am a scorp with venus in virgo and asc. virgo also....I do get along really well with them, but when it comes to relationships its almost like we are too similar, I think the criticism and the defensiveness/sensitivity to criticism goes both ways so really hard for either side to really be themselves, and express all the critical things they are feeling....discussions often devolve into blame shifting and arguments, neither side budging so you get no real resolution....
I usually just give in and sacrifice the things I need rather than argue.

He doesn't pick up on how I feel.

I don't expect him to.

I don't nag or criticize, I keep everything to myself. Behind my wall.
yeah my venus usually dies for their sins over and over again in early phases of relationship.....then eventually gets fed up and turns cold for not getting the recognition/worship it clearly earned.....
Yet my 12th house Venus is the epitome of devotion and service. I love to do so. I'm submissive, and take care of his needs as if they were my own.

I understand, believe me....the scariest part of getting into a relationship for me is that I know its when I'm at my most Virgo...lol...at the end of the day though, it can't be one-sided, and that's a huge trap I have to watch out for myself and know to avoid now....at some point when the euphoria of having that worthy object of affection/devotion wanes just a tad in light of the latest way my partner has unknowingly impaled my overly sensitive heart, I start making lists of what this person actually does for me besides just filling the role of betrayer in my ongoing narrative of martyrdom....do you do anything for me besides inspire me to make my life revolve around you and supporting you in every way? do you support/encourage/build up/compliment me in any way? know me at all? care to? usually nah....lol....that is when I realize I'm trapped in my own dysfunction, beyond just having a shit Venus placement....
Using the Virgo Venus logic to save yourself and your heart. Nice.

My scorpio Venus doesn't ??
this will sound super self-righteous but from my perspective, saving both of our's if I think the dynamic is unhealthy, which I'm always considering....even more so for the other persons sake, if I don't think I'm the best fit for them....I think thats part of what love actually entails for me, putting others before your own self interest/desires....I really am a martyr to the core...lol...
click to expand

Always thinking of the other.

Damn that's familiar. ?

Signed Up: Jan 16, 2016
Comments: 15 · Posts: 3089 · Topics: 64

Posted by EnochtheWise
Posted by shaymaci
Posted by EnochtheWise
Posted by shaymaci
Posted by EnochtheWise
Posted by shaymaci
Posted by EnochtheWise
Posted by shaymaci
Posted by EnochtheWise
Posted by shaymaci
Posted by PhoenixRising
Posted by shaymaci
Posted by PhoenixRising
Posted by shaymaci
I'll try. It's like walking on eggshells concerning his emotions.

Hmmmm. Can you elaborate please. Are you referring to opening up to you when he needs space, or is it hard to tell him how his actions make you feel?

How long does he take space and how is it causing emotional neglect?

He gets very sensitive about shit. I feel like if I say the wrong thing, he will close up.

If I want us closer, it irritates him.

And I mean closer emotionally, which is what I need, talking about things for the future.

I asked him where he saw himself in 5 years, that apparently is a no.

Hmmm, well forgive me for stating this but it sounds like you two may be talking a different language. working towards being "emotionally close" and talking about "the future" are different things. At least it is for me. One speaks to vulnerability, letting you know my heart, fears, desires and hope (more Scorp focus) and the other speaks to security (more Virgo focus). Now discussions about the future may be synonymous with emotional closeness for a you...but maybe not for him?

That may be the issue. Do you think he may be feeling like you don't trust he'll be around in the future so he's irritated with the doubt? If you're pushing a conversation about the future he may be wondering why that is.

I don't push conversations with him because I know he's defensive. I usually give up talking about some things altogether.

I don't like arguing. Neither does he.

But misunderstandings cause them.

And him getting defensive causes them.

I literally have to let him know that I'm not attacking him, not to take anything so personally.

And they aren't even offensive sentences ?
may be a little off topic but this is one are where I have trouble with my relationships with virgos.....am a scorp with venus in virgo and asc. virgo also....I do get along really well with them, but when it comes to relationships its almost like we are too similar, I think the criticism and the defensiveness/sensitivity to criticism goes both ways so really hard for either side to really be themselves, and express all the critical things they are feeling....discussions often devolve into blame shifting and arguments, neither side budging so you get no real resolution....
I usually just give in and sacrifice the things I need rather than argue.

He doesn't pick up on how I feel.

I don't expect him to.

I don't nag or criticize, I keep everything to myself. Behind my wall.
yeah my venus usually dies for their sins over and over again in early phases of relationship.....then eventually gets fed up and turns cold for not getting the recognition/worship it clearly earned.....
Yet my 12th house Venus is the epitome of devotion and service. I love to do so. I'm submissive, and take care of his needs as if they were my own.

I understand, believe me....the scariest part of getting into a relationship for me is that I know its when I'm at my most Virgo...lol...at the end of the day though, it can't be one-sided, and that's a huge trap I have to watch out for myself and know to avoid now....at some point when the euphoria of having that worthy object of affection/devotion wanes just a tad in light of the latest way my partner has unknowingly impaled my overly sensitive heart, I start making lists of what this person actually does for me besides just filling the role of betrayer in my ongoing narrative of martyrdom....do you do anything for me besides inspire me to make my life revolve around you and supporting you in every way? do you support/encourage/build up/compliment me in any way? know me at all? care to? usually nah....lol....that is when I realize I'm trapped in my own dysfunction, beyond just having a shit Venus placement....
Using the Virgo Venus logic to save yourself and your heart. Nice.

My scorpio Venus doesn't ??
this will sound super self-righteous but from my perspective, saving both of our's if I think the dynamic is unhealthy, which I'm always considering....even more so for the other persons sake, if I don't think I'm the best fit for them....I think thats part of what love actually entails for me, putting others before your own self interest/desires....I really am a martyr to the core...lol...
Always thinking of the other.

Damn that's familiar. ?
lol....yeah, and the fun part is that, being a scorp sun, I'm always ultimately doing the right thing by saving you from the plague that is me...lolol....this works out real well for all my Virgo parts, because I can never be wrong in breaking it off, and I don't have to carry so much guilt as I know I ultimately did what was best for you....lol
click to expand

That makes sense ??

My Venus loves scorpio energy though. ??

Signed Up: Jan 16, 2016
Comments: 15 · Posts: 3089 · Topics: 64

Posted by EnochtheWise
Posted by shaymaci
Posted by EnochtheWise
Posted by shaymaci
Posted by EnochtheWise
Posted by shaymaci
Posted by EnochtheWise
Posted by shaymaci
Posted by EnochtheWise
Posted by shaymaci
Posted by EnochtheWise
Posted by shaymaci
Posted by PhoenixRising
Posted by shaymaci
Posted by PhoenixRising
Posted by shaymaci
I'll try. It's like walking on eggshells concerning his emotions.

Hmmmm. Can you elaborate please. Are you referring to opening up to you when he needs space, or is it hard to tell him how his actions make you feel?

How long does he take space and how is it causing emotional neglect?

He gets very sensitive about shit. I feel like if I say the wrong thing, he will close up.

If I want us closer, it irritates him.

And I mean closer emotionally, which is what I need, talking about things for the future.

I asked him where he saw himself in 5 years, that apparently is a no.

Hmmm, well forgive me for stating this but it sounds like you two may be talking a different language. working towards being "emotionally close" and talking about "the future" are different things. At least it is for me. One speaks to vulnerability, letting you know my heart, fears, desires and hope (more Scorp focus) and the other speaks to security (more Virgo focus). Now discussions about the future may be synonymous with emotional closeness for a you...but maybe not for him?

That may be the issue. Do you think he may be feeling like you don't trust he'll be around in the future so he's irritated with the doubt? If you're pushing a conversation about the future he may be wondering why that is.

I don't push conversations with him because I know he's defensive. I usually give up talking about some things altogether.

I don't like arguing. Neither does he.

But misunderstandings cause them.

And him getting defensive causes them.

I literally have to let him know that I'm not attacking him, not to take anything so personally.

And they aren't even offensive sentences ?
may be a little off topic but this is one are where I have trouble with my relationships with virgos.....am a scorp with venus in virgo and asc. virgo also....I do get along really well with them, but when it comes to relationships its almost like we are too similar, I think the criticism and the defensiveness/sensitivity to criticism goes both ways so really hard for either side to really be themselves, and express all the critical things they are feeling....discussions often devolve into blame shifting and arguments, neither side budging so you get no real resolution....
I usually just give in and sacrifice the things I need rather than argue.

He doesn't pick up on how I feel.

I don't expect him to.

I don't nag or criticize, I keep everything to myself. Behind my wall.
yeah my venus usually dies for their sins over and over again in early phases of relationship.....then eventually gets fed up and turns cold for not getting the recognition/worship it clearly earned.....
Yet my 12th house Venus is the epitome of devotion and service. I love to do so. I'm submissive, and take care of his needs as if they were my own.

I understand, believe me....the scariest part of getting into a relationship for me is that I know its when I'm at my most Virgo...lol...at the end of the day though, it can't be one-sided, and that's a huge trap I have to watch out for myself and know to avoid now....at some point when the euphoria of having that worthy object of affection/devotion wanes just a tad in light of the latest way my partner has unknowingly impaled my overly sensitive heart, I start making lists of what this person actually does for me besides just filling the role of betrayer in my ongoing narrative of martyrdom....do you do anything for me besides inspire me to make my life revolve around you and supporting you in every way? do you support/encourage/build up/compliment me in any way? know me at all? care to? usually nah....lol....that is when I realize I'm trapped in my own dysfunction, beyond just having a shit Venus placement....
Using the Virgo Venus logic to save yourself and your heart. Nice.

My scorpio Venus doesn't ??
this will sound super self-righteous but from my perspective, saving both of our's if I think the dynamic is unhealthy, which I'm always considering....even more so for the other persons sake, if I don't think I'm the best fit for them....I think thats part of what love actually entails for me, putting others before your own self interest/desires....I really am a martyr to the core...lol...
Always thinking of the other.

Damn that's familiar. ?
lol....yeah, and the fun part is that, being a scorp sun, I'm always ultimately doing the right thing by saving you from the plague that is me...lolol....this works out real well for all my Virgo parts, because I can never be wrong in breaking it off, and I don't have to carry so much guilt as I know I ultimately did what was best for you....lol
That makes sense ??

My Venus loves scorpio energy though. ??
sooooo many of my closest friends, the ones I really can trust and tell everything to, are V in Scorp....I've been with one also....I always say I am in awe of this placement...it is so magnetic to me....Shitty as it is supposed to be for Venus, and though I do think its too heavy of a connection for me, I think the best compliment I could give is - if I could choose to love any way, it would be like a VinScorp bc I really do think it is superior in its loyalty, singular devotion, passion, and it is clearly the sexiest venus...lol....it does seem to be the case that it is suuper hard to find that true/lasting love for them, which of course is what they want most....seems to me the astro stereotypes do hold and the ones I know do go through several long phases of unrequited love, or chasing someone on the run, etc. Its unfortunate because it is such a powerful placement in other ways IMO....
click to expand

It is powerful.

People say it's bad because it's in it's detriment.

Oh fucking well.

Too bad.

They just can't stand that we love like you're supposed to love.

Hard, completely, and with all of your being.

Pussies they are. ?

Thank you for the appreciation. ❤

Wineaux15

@Wineaux15

Signed Up: Apr 18, 2017
Comments: 65 · Posts: 1066 · Topics: 13

I want a ViS! I never had someone with this placement but my Cap Venus is falling in love with it.

Signed Up: Jan 16, 2016
Comments: 15 · Posts: 3089 · Topics: 64

Posted by Wineaux15
I want a ViS! I never had someone with this placement but my Cap Venus is falling in love with it.

People love us? —

heliumfiasco

@heliumfiasco

13 Years1,000+ Posts

Signed Up: Jul 18, 2012
Comments: 872 · Posts: 3486 · Topics: 236

I have Virgo Venus and Mars both in 11th. Me trying to date is exhausting.

Vacation Queen

@saggurl88

12 Years25,000+ Posts

Signed Up: Feb 23, 2013
Comments: 22238 · Posts: 25616 · Topics: 84

Posted by Wineaux15
I want a ViS! I never had someone with this placement but my Cap Venus is falling in love with it.

I'm in love with a Cap venus/Aqua sun but he's playing with me lol. I'm trying to learn to be a little more non chalant though cause I'm scaring the shit out of him with my intensity! 😆

#whatever lol

Signed Up: May 08, 2017
Comments: 480 · Posts: 3567 · Topics: 13

Posted by EnochtheWise
Posted by Jules-ll
Posted by EnochtheWise
Posted by shaymaci
Posted by PhoenixRising
Posted by shaymaci
Posted by PhoenixRising
Posted by shaymaci
I'll try. It's like walking on eggshells concerning his emotions.

Hmmmm. Can you elaborate please. Are you referring to opening up to you when he needs space, or is it hard to tell him how his actions make you feel?

How long does he take space and how is it causing emotional neglect?

He gets very sensitive about shit. I feel like if I say the wrong thing, he will close up.

If I want us closer, it irritates him.

And I mean closer emotionally, which is what I need, talking about things for the future.

I asked him where he saw himself in 5 years, that apparently is a no.

Hmmm, well forgive me for stating this but it sounds like you two may be talking a different language. working towards being "emotionally close" and talking about "the future" are different things. At least it is for me. One speaks to vulnerability, letting you know my heart, fears, desires and hope (more Scorp focus) and the other speaks to security (more Virgo focus). Now discussions about the future may be synonymous with emotional closeness for a you...but maybe not for him?

That may be the issue. Do you think he may be feeling like you don't trust he'll be around in the future so he's irritated with the doubt? If you're pushing a conversation about the future he may be wondering why that is.

I don't push conversations with him because I know he's defensive. I usually give up talking about some things altogether.

I don't like arguing. Neither does he.

But misunderstandings cause them.

And him getting defensive causes them.

I literally have to let him know that I'm not attacking him, not to take anything so personally.

And they aren't even offensive sentences ?
may be a little off topic but this is one are where I have trouble with my relationships with virgos.....am a scorp with venus in virgo and asc. virgo also....I do get along really well with them, but when it comes to relationships its almost like we are too similar, I think the criticism and the defensiveness/sensitivity to criticism goes both ways so really hard for either side to really be themselves, and express all the critical things they are feeling....discussions often devolve into blame shifting and arguments, neither side budging so you get no real resolution....

I can see your point, but one of the things about dating scorps that I like the most is the level of comfort

without feeling the need to criticize or argue because it was so effortless. Perhaps that caused a lack of true communication?

Who knows? Where is your mercury @EnochtheWise?

I can see that, definitely in the beginning and with friendship...my problem is too much aries (Moon/Mars)...the more comfortable I get especially....I like to argue...without a little tension/friction, I tend to feel like there's no passion and get bored 😢 I will grow up one day though...

Merc is in Libra, the fairest of them all...I think that adds to my self-righteousness....
click to expand

Oh yeah, Aries likes to argue it's a form of foreplay without a doubt! You are have a lot of the same planets as my ex but with opposite sun/moon. I bet you are a passionate conversationalist...that's a good thing.

My merc is virgo, I'm all about logical thinking and expressing. My passionate side comes out physically more than verbally which is fine with me. 😉

Signed Up: May 08, 2017
Comments: 480 · Posts: 3567 · Topics: 13

Posted by EnochtheWise
Posted by shaymaci
Posted by EnochtheWise
Posted by shaymaci
Posted by EnochtheWise
Posted by shaymaci
Posted by EnochtheWise
Posted by shaymaci
Posted by PhoenixRising
Posted by shaymaci
Posted by PhoenixRising
Posted by shaymaci
I'll try. It's like walking on eggshells concerning his emotions.

Hmmmm. Can you elaborate please. Are you referring to opening up to you when he needs space, or is it hard to tell him how his actions make you feel?

How long does he take space and how is it causing emotional neglect?

He gets very sensitive about shit. I feel like if I say the wrong thing, he will close up.

If I want us closer, it irritates him.

And I mean closer emotionally, which is what I need, talking about things for the future.

I asked him where he saw himself in 5 years, that apparently is a no.

Hmmm, well forgive me for stating this but it sounds like you two may be talking a different language. working towards being "emotionally close" and talking about "the future" are different things. At least it is for me. One speaks to vulnerability, letting you know my heart, fears, desires and hope (more Scorp focus) and the other speaks to security (more Virgo focus). Now discussions about the future may be synonymous with emotional closeness for a you...but maybe not for him?

That may be the issue. Do you think he may be feeling like you don't trust he'll be around in the future so he's irritated with the doubt? If you're pushing a conversation about the future he may be wondering why that is.

I don't push conversations with him because I know he's defensive. I usually give up talking about some things altogether.

I don't like arguing. Neither does he.

But misunderstandings cause them.

And him getting defensive causes them.

I literally have to let him know that I'm not attacking him, not to take anything so personally.

And they aren't even offensive sentences ?
may be a little off topic but this is one are where I have trouble with my relationships with virgos.....am a scorp with venus in virgo and asc. virgo also....I do get along really well with them, but when it comes to relationships its almost like we are too similar, I think the criticism and the defensiveness/sensitivity to criticism goes both ways so really hard for either side to really be themselves, and express all the critical things they are feeling....discussions often devolve into blame shifting and arguments, neither side budging so you get no real resolution....
I usually just give in and sacrifice the things I need rather than argue.

He doesn't pick up on how I feel.

I don't expect him to.

I don't nag or criticize, I keep everything to myself. Behind my wall.
yeah my venus usually dies for their sins over and over again in early phases of relationship.....then eventually gets fed up and turns cold for not getting the recognition/worship it clearly earned.....
Yet my 12th house Venus is the epitome of devotion and service. I love to do so. I'm submissive, and take care of his needs as if they were my own.

I understand, believe me....the scariest part of getting into a relationship for me is that I know its when I'm at my most Virgo...lol...at the end of the day though, it can't be one-sided, and that's a huge trap I have to watch out for myself and know to avoid now....at some point when the euphoria of having that worthy object of affection/devotion wanes just a tad in light of the latest way my partner has unknowingly impaled my overly sensitive heart, I start making lists of what this person actually does for me besides just filling the role of betrayer in my ongoing narrative of martyrdom....do you do anything for me besides inspire me to make my life revolve around you and supporting you in every way? do you support/encourage/build up/compliment me in any way? know me at all? care to? usually nah....lol....that is when I realize I'm trapped in my own dysfunction, beyond just having a shit Venus placement....
Using the Virgo Venus logic to save yourself and your heart. Nice.

My scorpio Venus doesn't ??
this will sound super self-righteous but from my perspective, saving both of our's if I think the dynamic is unhealthy, which I'm always considering....even more so for the other persons sake, if I don't think I'm the best fit for them....I think thats part of what love actually entails for me, putting others before your own self interest/desires....I really am a martyr to the core...lol...
click to expand

Sometimes I hate having this venus. You just explained it way better than I can, the martyrdom. The pushing away people because I don't want them to be exposed to my darkness. Overthinking that I don't deserve them or vice versa. Being too chameleonic with my partners to please them instead of myself. Choosing to be alone because it's safer than having my heart ripped apart and handed back to me in tatters.

@shaymaci can we trade venuses please? I'll take your ViS any day to feel love that strongly...even if it's unrequited. Or maybe an air venus would be the way to go, carefree.

Signed Up: Jan 16, 2016
Comments: 15 · Posts: 3089 · Topics: 64

Posted by Jules-ll
Posted by EnochtheWise
Posted by shaymaci
Posted by EnochtheWise
Posted by shaymaci
Posted by EnochtheWise
Posted by shaymaci
Posted by EnochtheWise
Posted by shaymaci
Posted by PhoenixRising
Posted by shaymaci
Posted by PhoenixRising
Posted by shaymaci
I'll try. It's like walking on eggshells concerning his emotions.

Hmmmm. Can you elaborate please. Are you referring to opening up to you when he needs space, or is it hard to tell him how his actions make you feel?

How long does he take space and how is it causing emotional neglect?

He gets very sensitive about shit. I feel like if I say the wrong thing, he will close up.

If I want us closer, it irritates him.

And I mean closer emotionally, which is what I need, talking about things for the future.

I asked him where he saw himself in 5 years, that apparently is a no.

Hmmm, well forgive me for stating this but it sounds like you two may be talking a different language. working towards being "emotionally close" and talking about "the future" are different things. At least it is for me. One speaks to vulnerability, letting you know my heart, fears, desires and hope (more Scorp focus) and the other speaks to security (more Virgo focus). Now discussions about the future may be synonymous with emotional closeness for a you...but maybe not for him?

That may be the issue. Do you think he may be feeling like you don't trust he'll be around in the future so he's irritated with the doubt? If you're pushing a conversation about the future he may be wondering why that is.

I don't push conversations with him because I know he's defensive. I usually give up talking about some things altogether.

I don't like arguing. Neither does he.

But misunderstandings cause them.

And him getting defensive causes them.

I literally have to let him know that I'm not attacking him, not to take anything so personally.

And they aren't even offensive sentences ?
may be a little off topic but this is one are where I have trouble with my relationships with virgos.....am a scorp with venus in virgo and asc. virgo also....I do get along really well with them, but when it comes to relationships its almost like we are too similar, I think the criticism and the defensiveness/sensitivity to criticism goes both ways so really hard for either side to really be themselves, and express all the critical things they are feeling....discussions often devolve into blame shifting and arguments, neither side budging so you get no real resolution....
I usually just give in and sacrifice the things I need rather than argue.

He doesn't pick up on how I feel.

I don't expect him to.

I don't nag or criticize, I keep everything to myself. Behind my wall.
yeah my venus usually dies for their sins over and over again in early phases of relationship.....then eventually gets fed up and turns cold for not getting the recognition/worship it clearly earned.....
Yet my 12th house Venus is the epitome of devotion and service. I love to do so. I'm submissive, and take care of his needs as if they were my own.

I understand, believe me....the scariest part of getting into a relationship for me is that I know its when I'm at my most Virgo...lol...at the end of the day though, it can't be one-sided, and that's a huge trap I have to watch out for myself and know to avoid now....at some point when the euphoria of having that worthy object of affection/devotion wanes just a tad in light of the latest way my partner has unknowingly impaled my overly sensitive heart, I start making lists of what this person actually does for me besides just filling the role of betrayer in my ongoing narrative of martyrdom....do you do anything for me besides inspire me to make my life revolve around you and supporting you in every way? do you support/encourage/build up/compliment me in any way? know me at all? care to? usually nah....lol....that is when I realize I'm trapped in my own dysfunction, beyond just having a shit Venus placement....
Using the Virgo Venus logic to save yourself and your heart. Nice.

My scorpio Venus doesn't ??
this will sound super self-righteous but from my perspective, saving both of our's if I think the dynamic is unhealthy, which I'm always considering....even more so for the other persons sake, if I don't think I'm the best fit for them....I think thats part of what love actually entails for me, putting others before your own self interest/desires....I really am a martyr to the core...lol...
Sometimes I hate having this venus. You just explained it way better than I can, the martyrdom. The pushing away people because I don't want them to be exposed to my darkness. Overthinking that I don't deserve them or vice versa. Being too chameleonic with my partners to please them instead of myself. Choosing to be alone because it's safer than having my heart ripped apart and handed back to me in tatters.

@shaymaci can we trade venuses please? I'll take your ViS any day to feel love that strongly...even if it's unrequited. Or maybe an air venus would be the way to go, carefree.

click to expand

People say Venus in scorpio are psycho ??

You sure you want that?

The negatives that people hate are just, ugh

Sunsetvirgo

@Sunsetvirgo

9 Years5,000+ Posts

Signed Up: Jun 04, 2016
Comments: 1035 · Posts: 5643 · Topics: 48

Probably one of the few types of scorpios that I'll get along with

Signed Up: May 08, 2017
Comments: 480 · Posts: 3567 · Topics: 13

Posted by EnochtheWise
Posted by Jules-ll
Posted by EnochtheWise
Posted by shaymaci
Posted by EnochtheWise
Posted by shaymaci
Posted by EnochtheWise
Posted by shaymaci
Posted by EnochtheWise
Posted by shaymaci
Posted by PhoenixRising
Posted by shaymaci
Posted by PhoenixRising
Posted by shaymaci
I'll try. It's like walking on eggshells concerning his emotions.

Hmmmm. Can you elaborate please. Are you referring to opening up to you when he needs space, or is it hard to tell him how his actions make you feel?

How long does he take space and how is it causing emotional neglect?

He gets very sensitive about shit. I feel like if I say the wrong thing, he will close up.

If I want us closer, it irritates him.

And I mean closer emotionally, which is what I need, talking about things for the future.

I asked him where he saw himself in 5 years, that apparently is a no.

Hmmm, well forgive me for stating this but it sounds like you two may be talking a different language. working towards being "emotionally close" and talking about "the future" are different things. At least it is for me. One speaks to vulnerability, letting you know my heart, fears, desires and hope (more Scorp focus) and the other speaks to security (more Virgo focus). Now discussions about the future may be synonymous with emotional closeness for a you...but maybe not for him?

That may be the issue. Do you think he may be feeling like you don't trust he'll be around in the future so he's irritated with the doubt? If you're pushing a conversation about the future he may be wondering why that is.

I don't push conversations with him because I know he's defensive. I usually give up talking about some things altogether.

I don't like arguing. Neither does he.

But misunderstandings cause them.

And him getting defensive causes them.

I literally have to let him know that I'm not attacking him, not to take anything so personally.

And they aren't even offensive sentences ?
may be a little off topic but this is one are where I have trouble with my relationships with virgos.....am a scorp with venus in virgo and asc. virgo also....I do get along really well with them, but when it comes to relationships its almost like we are too similar, I think the criticism and the defensiveness/sensitivity to criticism goes both ways so really hard for either side to really be themselves, and express all the critical things they are feeling....discussions often devolve into blame shifting and arguments, neither side budging so you get no real resolution....
I usually just give in and sacrifice the things I need rather than argue.

He doesn't pick up on how I feel.

I don't expect him to.

I don't nag or criticize, I keep everything to myself. Behind my wall.
yeah my venus usually dies for their sins over and over again in early phases of relationship.....then eventually gets fed up and turns cold for not getting the recognition/worship it clearly earned.....
Yet my 12th house Venus is the epitome of devotion and service. I love to do so. I'm submissive, and take care of his needs as if they were my own.

I understand, believe me....the scariest part of getting into a relationship for me is that I know its when I'm at my most Virgo...lol...at the end of the day though, it can't be one-sided, and that's a huge trap I have to watch out for myself and know to avoid now....at some point when the euphoria of having that worthy object of affection/devotion wanes just a tad in light of the latest way my partner has unknowingly impaled my overly sensitive heart, I start making lists of what this person actually does for me besides just filling the role of betrayer in my ongoing narrative of martyrdom....do you do anything for me besides inspire me to make my life revolve around you and supporting you in every way? do you support/encourage/build up/compliment me in any way? know me at all? care to? usually nah....lol....that is when I realize I'm trapped in my own dysfunction, beyond just having a shit Venus placement....
Using the Virgo Venus logic to save yourself and your heart. Nice.

My scorpio Venus doesn't ??
this will sound super self-righteous but from my perspective, saving both of our's if I think the dynamic is unhealthy, which I'm always considering....even more so for the other persons sake, if I don't think I'm the best fit for them....I think thats part of what love actually entails for me, putting others before your own self interest/desires....I really am a martyr to the core...lol...
Sometimes I hate having this venus. You just explained it way better than I can, the martyrdom. The pushing away people because I don't want them to be exposed to my darkness. Overthinking that I don't deserve them or vice versa. Being too chameleonic with my partners to please them instead of myself. Choosing to be alone because it's safer than having my heart ripped apart and handed back to me in tatters.

@shaymaci can we trade venuses please? I'll take your ViS any day to feel love that strongly...even if it's unrequited. Or maybe an air venus would be the way to go, carefree.

LOL...everything you said in the 1st paragraph is me, still though even reading that, I just felt comfort....The logic of it all is so sound...lol....I guess when its my decision, I'm good with it....I know I need it, at least for a while....I would never want to be a ViS either - maybe love like them, but it really does seem like a hard placement to deal with for some....too much intensity for this scorp...lol
click to expand

I'm glad my crazy logic brought you comfort...there is benefit in exchanging thoughts with others that are intense. And that's definitely me, but it is what it is and I'll take this over being unfeeling and vacuous every single day.

Maybe we should both trade our ViVs for an aqua venus. It would be refreshing to not take things to such a deep mysterious place for awhile, to be unemotional, free-spirited, unconventional...zingara.