What's up with a Scorpian man?

How do you know what they actually want when they run sooo hot & cold all the time? Wanting to please you one minute and then ignoring you the next...Is this a normal trait? Mind you it is starting to bore me but I'm interested in the answer for next time...

It's a man thing not a scorp thing! A man being Hot all the time just doesn't exist Dear!

commitment phoboic....run

Based on my younger Scorpio Brother, I'd say they're great for the short term, but often fail for the long term relationship...

Actually the commitment phobic one is me! I just like a little attention every so often but find that a week with nothing has me bored and looking elsewhere. I guess I've answered my own question really but it's not til it's on paper that I figure it out! hehe

Scorpio men can be that way however they are extreme in both cases. Either they are intensely into you then dissappear and reappear being more intensely into you like nothing ever happened. It can really suck sometimes. I know, been there.

My Scorp can be very hot. Then calm. Not cold. He never disappears though. We can't be without each other for even a day. It's been like that these past 3 years.

Just like me you must be analysing every conversation/text which is probably more frustrating than anything!!! To be honest I've come to the conclusion that you cant have a relationship with only one person in it and the ignorance drives me MAD!! Time for me to get out...and if he happens to pop in at some stage I might just tell him!! Oh and if I meet another Scorpian man I'm running for the hills!!! As a librian we need things to be on a par with one another.

XFoosMe I understand your feelings, I too have felt that feeling yet he won't change, accept him how he is or leave, you choose, he's not going to stop, your 5 years in, you either change your behavior to help him change his or put up with it. Walking away is the only way he's going to take you seriously and stop doing what he's doing, if your scared to lose then keep doing what your doing and getting what you get from it, most women don't like the answer but the woman that have braved it, made the steps to change, have gotten what they want out of it...you will continue to get what your getting if you choose to keep doing what your doing

The very fact that you want him is futile food for him to keep doing what he wants to do, how he wants to do it....he is not clear on his feelings about you, he's confused, he's in and he's out, he's hot and cold and you accept it...only you can change what you no longer want to experience

This is a man thang, not a sign thang...yet I'm sure someone will come and sugar coat it for ya.

If you walk away and he chooses to walk away and never come back, that lets you know that he was never serious and he was only gonna give you crumbs...Do you seriously have 5 more years to give this guy? You only have one life, you can never get your years back, you implement boundaries or continue to get dragged in and out and strung along

I'm not going to discourage being patient, if you feel that it will help you then try it out, In my opinion if you or any woman have to twist and turn everything about herself, change the things that make you YOU then he's not the one for you, there may be love and physical chemistry but he may not be someone that can be with you all the time, he may not be abusive like some men are, he may be super sweet and nice and giving when he chooses to be with you but that doesn't make him want more.....so it's really about what you need and want, if you need a man that is in it 100% , someone that isn't running hot and cold, someone that can deal with you no matter what then ask yourself is this the guy for you...Again accept him as he is or walk away, you can't change another human being, you can change YOU and he may change as you set boundaries etc but you can't change him, you can't make him stop behaving in a way that makes you unhappy.

He may not have that forever feeling with you, the feeling that makes a man want to be with a woman forever, marriage, kids...he feels it or he doesn't and it sounds like he doesn't feel it because he's in and out, you have to decide if you have more years to give him

If you really want it to stop then you have to be strong inside and mean what you say if you decide to say it and stop it, you have to tell him how you feel about his in and out patterns, you have to be brave and say hey this doesn't feel good, the next time your out, you need to stay gone and mean it and if your not prepared to say that then you will keep getting what you get and this isn't about ultimatums and walking away, it's about you no longer allowing yourself to be strung along, this is about love of self and knowing that you deserve to have the best relationship for self

They call women like you yo yo girls because you allow men to come back and forth....call you fall back girls because women like you allow men to fall back in when he's bored, when he's temporarily single, when he doesn't have a better option, when he's in love and involved with someone else and need a break from his real woman...because you don't demand more for yourself

good luck, I wish the best for you d:

You can't make someone love you! Buy the book..."he's just not that into you..."

xfoosme: I totally agree with tiki.
look, I've been in and out not 5 but anyway 2 years.
the only thing they understand, respect, and consider is strenght and determination not to accept their crap. because IT IS crap. and they know it. it's a game. be the gambler, get out of it, really, for a long, long long time. close all, ALL communication with him. and just sit and watch. he comes back, set the rules with him BEFORE taking him back. doesnt' come back, you will be aware yuo have lost 5 years with a whimsical baby and thank god you will not waste other 5 minutes.
but please, GET OUT! it's the one thing they understand. take my word.

" Why do they pop in and out and do they not care that it hurts?"

THEY HATE BEING COMPLETELY VULNERABLE AND WHEN THEY LOVE THEY GET REALLY VULNERABLE. It is a balancing act. I kind of understand being a scorp myself. We can be moody and when we are emotionally out of control we sometimes need to recheck ourselves and grasp that control again.

By the way they really don't mean to hurt you when they do. Not when they love you.

XfoosMe, what sign are you?

By the way they really don't mean to hurt you when they do
lol QS --- how're you?

THEY HATE BEING COMPLETELY VULNERABLE AND WHEN THEY LOVE THEY GET REALLY VULNERABLE. It is a balancing act. I kind of understand being a scorp myself. We can be moody and when we are emotionally out of control we sometimes need to recheck ourselves and grasp that control again.
everyone's vulnerable in a balanced relationship - if there's control or forseeableabilty, it's too often one-sided and unrealistic.

Actions speak louder than words!