How do you treat your parents?

It disturbs me how mean and snappy the Virgos in my life are towards their parents, especially their mothers. Although, it's mostly the Virgo women I've witnessed freak out on their parents for no real discernible reason. But then I've seen the men do it too. If anything it appeared as if their parents were showing concern or asking questions out of concern and the Virgos snapped.

So I'm wondering if this is a common Virgo trait...

How do you treat your parents?
Are you short-tempered with them?
Do they annoy you easily?
Do you find yourself eventually treating your romantic partners this way?

Maybe it's my upbringing or my culture but the blatant, unwarranted disrespect makes my skin crawl.

Posted by RoseTheTaurus

Maybe it's my upbringing or my culture but the blatant, unwarranted disrespect makes my skin crawl.

It makes me feel uneasy too. I'm in a relationship with a Canadian now and every time I am in Canada (I'm from continental Europe of Eurasian ethnicity) it shocks me how his younger sisters talk to their mother when angry. I'd never dare say such things to my parents. I don't even think my parents would accept and take such behavior for me and it would make me feel very ashamed of myself, anyway. Now, I'm not saying it's normal for North Americans or what not, probably not, but I've never seen such disrespect for a parental figure before. Especially in such a nice, loving family.

How do you treat your parents? I treat them with respect. I mean we are friendly.
Are you short-tempered with them? No. I'm not really the short-tempered type in general.
Do they annoy you easily? Not really. I mean, they have their annoying sides but nothing to loose my mind over ,usually.

As for the original Virgo question. I'm not sure. My partners sisters are a fellow Pisces and a Sagittarius. He is a Leo and he is very respectful to his parents ,but he was also the eldest of the siblings and was brought up stricter then his younger siblings. He can still say mean things about them when angry and not in their presence though. I always cringe.

After reading some of the comments, I do think it might be more of how one was raised and/ or disciplined. My mom would slit my throat and then fill it with concrete, if I spoke to her the way these specific Virgos spoke to their parents. But I recently spent a lot of time with these Virgos families, so it might just be situation bias. Thanks for the feedback!

it can happen if the parents are for example air signs and, under the guise of caring, are constantly asking stupid questions and belittling the person in a sneaky way.
My parents for example are always nice on the outside but every time I visit them they're always asking the same personal questions, and repeating the same stupid advice. I've told them to respect my limits several times but apparently it's something that they can't do.
Sometimes when you have someone on your back 24/7 you are obliged to snap. Me and my aries sister did very often when we were living in their home.

Posted by CluelessCancerIF they treat their mother like that, how are they going to treat their partners?

This is a good point--

But so is this:

Posted by CluelessCancer
lmao, but my mother drives me nuts, so i probably understand. she' terrorizes me people. Save me.

click to expand

I didn't like the way one of my Virgo bf's talked to his mother-- it was awful.

But by the same token, he didn't like the way I talked to mine.

He was oblivious to his own mouth-- but regarding MY mom-- you (generally speaking) just don't make a judgement call on the whole mother/daughter dynamic.

We've been pushing each others buttons for years, and she is much better at it than I am; that is, she is more subtle and far more crafty-- but she's still DOING IT. 😛

I wouldn't let anyone trifle with my mom-- so my attitude was 'butt out'. 😄

My other Virgo bf wasn't really rude to his mom-- he just avoided her like the plague, and made sure he had at least two states (minimum) between them.

My mother was Aqua, and my husbands mother was Gemini .... we were both raised in the generation where you respected your parents, or you got your ass whipped.


Todays parents are too busy being oppressed by their own children.


I'm not surprised these mothers are being abused ... that's how you idiots who won't reprimand your kids are suppose to be treated.


Remember, you're suppose to teach people how to treat you. Well, if you don't make them mind, then they'll grow up to be self righteous fuckers, and turn on your ass.

I think i may be guilty of this. I used to be very close to my mother. I'm an only, and grew up in a very dysfunctional house. More like a war-zone. My parents never agreed on anything. My dads the overbearing very domineering Taurus and my mum an extremely emotional/negative cancer. I sometimes blame them for how my life turned out, but especially my mum 'cause being closer to her she made up a lot of lies which misled me severely. My dad was also distant, but with that i know what to expect and what not to. My mother was more convert, making sorta her second husband, through which she projected alot of her insecurities and unrealistic ambitions. This may sound harsh, but its all true.
Now i do not intend dwelling on these things but it was all a phase i had to go through analyzing my life and why i'm where i am today. In no way do i blame them everything , but i'm at a stage where i'm trying to secure the way forward, away from all d pain and past failures, and honestly, i'm intolerant to whatever smothering that will not advance my cause. This is where the conflict occurs between us as she is more a black & white thinking person, and i'm more realistic. I do belive if things got better with me, i wouldn't mind her whims though every now and then, but until such a time, even as i watch her suffer, i Must stay focused.

Posted by PotHeadVirgo24

I'm short tempered with my mom because she nags the futch outta me. Always asking me a million questions about some shit I haven't remotely given two seconds of my time to think about.

So, in that self proclaimed logical mind, it never occurs to you that to consider her wishes of you acknowledging a topic for her sense of feeling heard, would likely stop her continuance of asking the same question?


fwi: for the most part, people don't want to fight, they want to be taken seriously at the bargaining table.

of course, you're a Virgo, so certainly, you'll rationalize yourself being exempt of considering that .... because it's easier for the Virgo to bitch about what they don't like, then actually do something constructive to remedy a situation.

Yea u might be onto something there. About sharing my thoughts with her, well lets just say i've realized its better to let it go and accept she will Never change. Harsh again, but trust me this is a conclusion i have come to after really, really trying. Yes, i do believe she did need to be loved at that earlier stage of her relationship with my father, but what i've realised also is she can be quite unmoving when her mind is made up, especially in terms of love and relationships. Do Not Cheat On A Cancer. Even harmless is a no no. That's the black and white thinking i'm talking of. i do not mean all cancers are this way, but i have learnt so much from my parents albeit negative experiences, but knowledge is what it is knowledge. About being loved completely, i believe that is subjective, and if you know the lenghts you are willing to go for love, you should help you partner, or soon-to-be significant other, understand your love language, so no one is deluded when d relationship does kick off as i think this would go a long way in decreasing the amount of heartache in relationships. Nobody is psychic.

harmless *flirting*

I was my Leo Mom's favorite, but I mistreated her in my youth, because she seemed to be suffocating me. I made up for it as an adult, and I am so glad that I did - we lost her in 1996.

Always got along with my Virgo Dad (go figure), but we did butt heads from time to time. He'll be 90 next year, but looks like he's in his sixties - and his mind is still sharp as a tack.

I was always very close to my maternal grandparents (Libra Man & Virgo Woman), and there's hardly a day that goes by that I don't think of them.

Sag mum and Taurus stepdad (who raised me from the age of 7).

I was brought up to respect both my parents and if I stepped out of line I was punished - grounded, favourite items confiscated etc. Now that I am older yes I will stand my ground if we disagree (my mum has a tendency to nag, mainly because she's so overprotective) however I still talk to them with respect.

By the time my Virgo sister was born, some 14 years after me, they had mellowed and were less strict. My sister walked all over them and to this day there are times where I am nothing short of disgusted by how she speaks to them. Needless to say if she does it whenever I'm around she's put in her place sharpish. I will not and do not tolerate it.

My father, a Cancer, is deceased. He demanded respect from us growing up. My mother, a Libra, has always been more like my child than parent. While I would never curse or yell at her, I certainly don't hold back when I do have something she needs to hear.

I have an interesting dynamic with my parents. I'm my mom's(Leo) only and my Dad's (Cancer) oldest girl. I respect my dad to the fullest. My parents never married but he was always in my life. I moved in with him when I was 14. I suddenly went from a self indulgent only child to the a big sister with responsibilities. My dad was strict but my mom was too so there wasn't too much adjustment there.

I respect my mom but we have our issues. She raised me mostly by herself. She never asked my Dad for child support, never really asked him for money after their relationship soured, good old Leo pride. She hated when she had to ask my dad to do anything so as a Result she worked very hard, and was able to provide me with a good stable childhood. I moved in with my Dad when I was a teen because I wanted to get to know him.

I respect my Dad and never ever speak in any way but respect, however my mom is different. After I moved out of my mom's house she went from being a strict parent to trying to be my best friend which I found weird and annoying. However what really made me lose alot of respect for my mom is an incident where my mom stole from me to feed her gambling habit. I had $ 5k in cash on me I had saved up this money for a long time. My mom and I were on Vacation together a cruise and she lost all her money in the ships Casino and then stole my money in the middle of the night and lost that too. I was 17 and that killed my relationship with my mom. I never trusted her again and lost respect for her. Thus I can speak to my mom harshly. What kills me the most is that she never apologized. She won't admit to any wrong doing and always trys to downplay the incident.

This is an interesting topic.
I have never talked disrespectfully to either parent. Honestly, I never even knew that was an option growing up. I remember the first time I saw a peer yell back at her parents. My mouth dropped. Never! All my mother had to do was say, "I am going to tell your dad when he gets home" and that was it. Wasn't afraid of my dad, but didn't want to see his face and disappointment there.
He died when I was 19, I don't know if I would have challenged him as an adult. Still don't talk back to my mom. Just isn't an option. I will talk just not yell at her.
Raised my kids like that too. I let them yell and vent about things but not towards me or about me.
My virgo daughter did one time yelled at me - and it only took 20 years. lol I was more proud of her for finally standing up for herself than I was offended. She cried the whole time, and later still asked for permission to do what she wanted to do - she wouldn't if I didn't consent. And she apologized and punished herself for that stunt - more so than I would have. I didn't have to do a thing but be silent.

I have heard my virgo boyfriend talks horribly to his son while on the phone with. He will cuss and yell at him for asking a common 12 year old questions.. 'I forgot x.." etc.
I cringe. I want to say something, like "hey he is only a kid" but I hold back. I don't know that if he ever did that while in my presence if I could hold back. I hate to see kids be abused, physically or verbally. Or women for that matter. Or the elderly. That will set me off.

In the back of my mind I wonder if he would try that with me some day.
He has told me that he did yell at him mom when he was growing up. For all I know he still does.