Virgo Retreat is a Good Thi (Page 2)

Yeah, we do take for granted the things we shouldn't. I truly hope that you get to connect with them again in the near future . . you never know about life . . maybe something wonderful will happen and you'll get to see your little sister again. I'll be hoping so, for you.

Now, I feel so much better. Thank you ladies (and our token man) for cheering me up. I guess I was being selfish. Sometimes, even I need a kick in the rump to get me in gear. I have to stop feeling sorry for myself and live, right?

I'll try to be better. And going on that cruise will be a start. I'm kind of afraid of the ocean, but, those boats are huge, right?

Good P, go on the cruise, you definitely should! And, someone may look or more... have FUN! You can still talk and flirt....

Why doesn't he touch you -- does he need a physical checkup, some pills, etc? Or is it just he's not into sex anymore -- but this is a GUY right? Ha! I didn't think they every stopped being interested....

Yeah, you can't go the rest of your life w/o sex/love/intimacy/emotional connection.... you will die then...

I know EXACTLY how you feel -- like i said i have been there, but feeling a little better lately..... but it's awful isn't it? this feeling of IS THIS IT—?

Well, i think we should form a SUPPORT GROUP and meet up and go on a week long or long weekend trip somewhere -- maybe in each others places of abode -- switch around.... wouldn't that be fun?

Eaglegirl -- i am a scorpio as well and married to a Cancer man -- they can be such babies! that is what i hate -- i don't like having to be the 'man'.... anyway i have 3 girls as well -- my beauties/loves of my life too!!

but i have been married 21 years!!! anyway, it's good to talk to other women in same/similar boats.... it really, really helps....

that's so great about your gf -- way to go!! yeah, younger men, that's where it's at!!! ha!

I like your support group idea . . we should do that . . meet up in the Bahama's would be cool.

OMG - i'm serious - the Bahamas would be fabulous -- we could meet up once a year or once every 6 months or something -- i think we should seriously try to get something going..... women need the support and empathy of other women, cuz we certainly are never gonna get it from men!

No way . . especially if they're workaholics, like mine.

One day (hopefully soon) . . the phase will pass and then look out world. My mother warned me about this time in a woman's life, but, when your young, you just go, "yeah, yeah, yeah . . that'll never happen to me. I'm invinciable."

A couple more years . . my chemicals will stablize . . and then I'm climbing back to the top. Until then, you're right, linda, women need each other at this time. Men dont' know how to empathize with us. One good thing, cycles will stop soon . . yahoo !!!

well, so do you think that it's just a chemical/hormonal mid-life crises that pretty much all women go through in their 40s? And do you think you come out of it and are fine and happy again? is that what you mean? cuz, maybe that is the case.... and then are you thinking that i will just 'stick it out' cuz you wouldn't want to leave now and then in a few years look back and go, 'oh god, why did i give up that good man/good life for being single and alone? is that what you are thinking? cuz sometimes i think that way...

My mother went through something similiar . . all women do . . we feel all used up and taken for everything we had . . but, that's just our feelings because of our hormones. My doctor wont' put me on hormone pills because I smoke (I know . . bad).

I'm thinking it's all about hormones . . it's just so hard to go through because it leaves a person to feel so lost, no direction because what you did have, everybody used up . . your energy, your patience, everything is gone . . hopefully, just a few more years and I'll get some reasons to keep going back, like I used to have. Only this time, when I get it back . . I aint' letting nobody suck the life out of me again.

P - you do need to go to the gym or start walking , cuz exercise is great -- almost as good as sex for you -- all those endorphins ya know! it will make you feel better about yourself too....

DY -- YES, YES, YES, that is what i want in a man, Lord Byron and BRAVEHEART or whatever you said, whomever.....

It's not so easy to leave, esp when you have young kids still at home and especially when the man is good, doesn't cheat, beat or anything remotely close... but i think after a long time w/someone.... you need change.. i dunno.

Shaka, we fish girls scare ourselves sometimes, so dont' feel bad.

Going to the gym? I have one in my living room . . but, smoke too much to use it. Get winded just thinking about exercise, as my ass gets fatter and fatter.

Actually, I haven't smoked in two days . . one reason why I'm so bitchy . . probably the MAIN reason why I'm so bitchy . . fiegning really bad. I wanna smoke a cig so bad that I'm literally either crying or yelling.

I have all kinds of equipment, once I get my lungs back, I'm gonna work this fat off because my plan is to leave my marriage. I'm hoping that if I can get pretty again, I'll find the courage.

Oh, and i did get involved with a Virgo male.... we are both in marriages.... he did wreck my life for awhile... that is what lead me to start talking on here... i was trying to figure out/understand his virgo ways....

i think i understand him, but it doesn't help, cuz i still have feelings for him..

but i have a good man, and i should make that work.... it's just i'm not excited by him anymore... his focus on his career the last few years left me feeling like i wanted/needed/deserved some love and attention, so i found it with the Virgo (long distance affair) mainly by email/txts/phone calls....

anyway, he is not responding anymore since our last big blowup.... so maybe he's gone for good, don't know....

"OR... you could do the Debra Thing: Have a baby!"

OMG . . bite your tongue

If I get pretty and skinny again, he might want to touch me again . . then, maybe I won't want to leave.

P- that's great! It sounds like a PLAN of ACTION!!! Way to go -- feel good about that, continue to NOT SMOKE!! Start walking (you can do that)... then work up to jogging, or working on equipment, but start somewhere!!! Don't stop and you'll be running out the door... and Definitely go on the CRUISE!!!! Your life is changing already, right before your eyes!!!

DY - i'm laughing out loud (LOL!) -- very cute! very Virgo! yeah, too bad, cuz i'm a scorpio too -- maybe your loss as well..... ha!

anyway, the Virgo and i we talked well, laughed well, kissed well, .... well, but he told me ' if i can't be man enough to leave her, i gotta stay and we gotta cool it off and not talk so much, etc.' that was sorta the beginning of the end, but now it's 14 months later and we still are sort of in contact... well, he hasn't responded lately.... anyway .... i guess if its meant to be, somehow we'll talk or see each other again...

I know getting old is hard on men, too, Dyr. He's 50 and the years are taking a toll on him, too. I'm being totally unfair and I know I am. But, I can't see my path anylonger WITH him . . and that scares me.

I'll get better, I'll stop whinning (I'll try, anyway).

Thank you for the slap, I needed it.

P-Angel,

Now that's more like it! You are intelligent and bright....the world holds many opportunities for you...

The exercise plan sounds fabulous. I can't tell you the difference exercise makes in my day. Did you know it's been scientifically proven that exercise creates hormones that make you think differently? Yep...read "Molecules of Emotion" by Dr. Candace Pert.

'Cause it's not like we "think" with our brain, with a body stuck on for good measure, no we have a "body-mind" -- every cell is intelligent.

Try Lesley Sansone's Walk Away the Pounds program on videos or DVD. It's good if you can't get out of the house...

You know, P-Angel, as a pisces you could probably groove to the fact that we create everything through energy....get to the space where you feel good all the time, and you will automatically get to where you want to go to. It is common sense -- you will be confident, talking to new people, and the opportunities will flow...

I'll be praying for you!

Eaglegurl 🙂

And, P-Angel, I'll add this on....

You are smart and can see through my "words of wisdom"....no, it's not always easy for me going solo...

Sometimes I still have a lot of fear in me, also insecurities, you're a smart Pisces, I know you know...

But I have to say this...even a few baby steps taken every day...has brought me such a long way over time...

And I know it works...even for a chicken like me...like alot of us

Eagletgurl

"and you realise your whole LIFE has been about other people..........you never did quite get round to getting to know YOURSELF along the way........and your running out of time."

My whole adult life has been about taking care of my family and their needs .. I had things I wanted to do, too, with my life . . but, who was gonna take care of everybody if I did my own thing? I had dreams, I wanted to be somebody when I grew up, other than just a wife, mother, maid and cook.

The fear of living for nothing strangles the will . .

Roxi, linda . . it helps to know that I'm not alone, going through this. Men don't get it . . the only thing they have to worry about is their employment, getting pussy, and their cars being shiny so they can impress their buddies . . that's it . . that's nothing . . that's a fraction of what a woman does to care for her family and home.

Impress the mates . . geeez . . that's it. You can even take Dyr, for example, when he talks about Deb, he makes sure he adds about what she looks like, that all men looked at her and ain't we all impressed that HE ended up with the prize . . how shallow. It's not his fault because that's all men know . . the only thing they know how to do is compare dicks . . . life is real tough for them with their little dick complexes.

Anyway . . I'm done with them. For now, I have to "pretend" in order to keep my sanity, but, I'm gonna stop forsaking myself. I've got an education and skills . . just need to put them to use. This time, I'm NOT going back to smoking . . this time, I'm quitting because now I have a purpose other than just sitting here, getting old, waiting to die while I fold towels.

I can take half his money and still live with myself. I can because I've worked my fingers to the bone . . the reason why he was able to work all the time and not worry about the home is because I was there working it for him . . everything . . he had clean clothes and ate a decent meal in a clean house BECAUSE of me and I'm gonna take my share of the assets and dip . .

I'm done with men . . if I hook up with someone in the future . . she'll be female. Men just use women for domestic chores and pussy . . and I'm not doing that again.

Fuck them all !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I'm glad my dad told me how to prepare for this stuff. lol

Right now, it's 4:30 Pm

ooops, I forgot how to tell time, apparantly . . it's nearly 5:00 pm

He's male, that's about all I can say.

"My Scorp IS a F0cking Genius"

Because you're such a catch?

You know, you're concieted . . has anyone ever told you that?

Lucky her . . she got you, right?

"Are you ladies being shallow when you want a macho guy who can f0ck all night?"

Tell you the truth, I don't know any women who wants this in a man. I come on here and read a lot of posts on all 12 signs and really, the only thing I see that women want is just for a man to understand her and communicate with her.

Communication seems to be a real big problem, as one can tell if you read these posts by women . . . if men interpret that as "fucking all night", then perhaps, men ARE the problem, afterall, because nothing is being said about being macho and fucking all night.

Anyway . . I'm done with men . . they interpret everything with their dicks, just like this response from you . . . to you . . women just want to get fucked and that's not it at all . . but, that's all you see . . dick comparisons.

That confirmed my assessment.

Bye Dyr . . .

Dyr, suck my dick

g'night, Rox

Ok, you all have to stop fighting.... p you know deep down you like and respect Dy, and Dy feels the same about you..... and Roxi, as usual, you are right....

listen.... let's all meet up somewhere and talk and drink and swim and jog and eat fabulous food, wouldn't that be fun—?

anyway, life's too short... i do have a good man, he's just been preoccupied with career and stuff, but he can also be too conservative, too boring, too straight, yet, he can also be very loving and passionate....

i don't know, it's difficult being a woman at this time of yer life....

but let's talk and have fun and help each other, not fight and be mean, k?.....

You volunteering?

I can swing, you know . . no problem.

He can handle it . . he's been married twice . . if he ain't been bitched out by now then he's got serious problems that go way beyond me and my moods.

Now, we're still together . . but, I'm on my way out. It's just not so easy, we have property . . personal/real/investments . . but, I'm making my move.

A friend and me are gonna go on a cruise and she's a real rock to me (she's only in her 20's and the most solid woman I know . . Gem), she's good to me and will have my back and keep me sane. Once I get back, shit's gonna hit the fan . . I've made up my mind. He's history and I'll be looking for a woman . . I'm turning coat.

So, that means I have to hate men now, see.
Plus, Virgo's . . so, there's just no hope.
Someones got to listen to me bitch. My dogs are no good, they just howl until I shut up.

I like eating women better than men anyway, so what the hell . . who needs them, anyway?

I'll just find some big masculine butch, who hates men too . . that'll make it easier for me to forget about them.

I actually like dykes . . that's my style of female . . I'm real fem . . overwieght, but girly.

I'm in love with a man . . so, again . . I'll have to eat my words . . dammit

I know it's not their fault, Rox . . especially with my husband . . he got spoiled, never had to lift a finger to do anything and now I resent him for it because it's my turn now . . and he's not stepping up to the plate . . I did my job, now I want to live . . but, no . . he's helpless. It's probably my fault . . dammit.

P-Angel have you talked to him or is it just too late?

woodsnake . . he's male, so he just doesn't get it . . normally, if a woman tries to talk about these things with guys . . they scratch their penises, thinking sexual stuff because that's all they know . . their job is money and sex and nothing else . . so, if the problem isn't financial, then they think, it must be sexual . . that's just the way it is, it seems.

so, to talk to him really doesn't mean anything . . he would just accuse me of having an affair because that's the only way he knows how to process female problems.

ok P-Angel I think you may have just taught me to grow some balls so here goes...just want you to know I'm not trying to hurt your feelings though(sorry can't help myself)....What exactly is it you want? are you being honest with yourself? Do you love your husband? Could you see your life without him? You are going through a hard time within yourself and sometimes emotions as I know you know can really fuck up your head and way of thinking.

Altho your man may behave as if he is helpless, he's not.... so, if i were you i would go on the Cruise and tell him before you go that you expect changes around here when you return....

then when you return (especially if you had a great time and feel good about yourself/confident), you can give him an ultimatum -- either he works on helping out around the house, giving you sex, whatever it is you want -- but spell it out for him! that you will be leaving... and give him a time period to change.....

that will make him stand up and change -- if he wants to keep you...

First of all, to woodsnake . . you can't hurt my feelings or offend me, don't worry about that. I shoot straight and expect it in return . .

Ok, here's the problem . . the main problem with my marriage . . I've said it before on here, indirectly talking about Virgo's . . it's sexual . . there is no passion, no intimacy . . nothing . . just sex and nothing more. I'm female, I HAVE to have emotional support . . he knows this . . he shares our bedroom. He knows that I'm dying in my feminity in this department. He's known for quite some time . . but, CHOOSES to ignore it as he has ignored everything in our marriage emotional.

He's male . . he can't comprehend what I'm saying. If I tell him the problem is sex, then he either fucks harder or accuses me of having an affair. He doesn't get that because I am woman, I have to have intimacy WITHOUT sex sometimes, tenderness. He doesn't get it, no matter what I tell him.

So, we don't sleep together any longer . . haven't for a long time.

There . . I said it . . that's the problem.

It's done . . it's been ages and he deosn't care . . if he cared, he would do something to make me feel like a woman again . . now, it's just lingering because we have so much invested.

I haven't cheated yet . . and it's against my principals to do so . . but, it's only a matter of time before I can't stand it any longer.

Does he do anything about it?

No . . so, what choice is left? To remain a faithful and serving wife until I die, being denied . . .

Bitter ——?


That would be an understatement . . fuck !!!!!!!!!!!!!

I'm gonna do it . . I have to . . I have to feel again 'cause I'm dying.

Ok so would it make a difference if he changed now, became more responsive or loving? And lastly do you still find him sexually attractive? I'm not asking these questions to pry into tour life I'm interested to know how you would respond to it if it happened.

Pry away, woodsnake . . don't worry about my feelings, honey . . he crushed any I had a long fucking time ago . . I don't feel much any more . . that should be obvious.

It's always been this way . . but, things move fast in life . . the home, raising the family, I took care of his parents until they died, my parents until they died . . time marches on and while it's moving and there's so many things to do to take care of everybody . . our personal life got ignored because it wasn't as important as everbody else who was in need . . Piscean crap . . don't do it woodsnake . . being the martyr sucks friggin turds in the end.

So, to him . . everything is the same as it's always been . . it's me who is in need now. I've done my job and now I want to live . . he can't see that anything is wrong because nothing has changed.

I don't know if that makes sense to you, but, it does in my head.

Shit P-Angel I'm really feeling for you, but I don't think cheating is the answer I did that and didn't bargain on the intense feelings that went with it, it just compounded the whole mess, don't get me wrong it was very flattering he was 11 years younger and it was lovely can't pretend it wasn't and i still think about him every day but it wasn't the answer

it makes more sense to me than I can say my circumstances were just different thats all I just can't voice how I really feel even to myself I just push it all to the back of my mind as long as there is wine and my sense of humour doesn't fail me then I'll be ok

I won't woodsnake . . I'll leave him first. And not only because it's against my morals, for I can live with that kind of guilt. The main reason why I won't is because I am aware of myself and aware of my NEED for attention and affection.

If I did another person right now and that person showed me tender affection, I would lose track of myself and my feelings and erroneously believe "I'm in love". That wouldn't be real, I know this now . . but, it's likely I wouldn't see it then.

So, I won't fool myself like that . . I get pissed when other people expect men to be in love with them when it's not felt and I refuse to let myself fall under that enchantment.

However, even if I wait until I've left him . . I still have this problem to face. Not sure how I'm gonna get a handle on my true feelings and the "love illusions".

Hey maybe a women wouldn't be so bad after all the sex could be great and emotionally far less complicated........

"I just can't voice how I really feel even to myself I just push it all to the back of my mind as long as there is wine and my sense of humour doesn't fail me then I'll be ok"

I know . . it's scary. Wine and blunts . . a terrified woman's best friend is turning her brain to mush so she doesn't have to feel what she deosnt' want to face.

Woodsnake . . it's a weakness that belongs to our kind. I dont' know any way to overcome it . . look how long it's taken me to face it? I wish I knew what to tell you on how to get it out without feeling like you're dying inside, but, I don't.

A woman is damn needy, though and falls in love easily . . that might be worse.

Piscean women feel alive when we are living FOR another person . . it is also what destroys us inside. To feel valuable . . we have to be needed to take care of another. But, then once a woman's hormones change later in life . . it drives us mad because we didn't live for ourselves.

This is what it is, isn't it?

You know that to feel alive . . you HAVE to have somebody to live for?

And don't know how to get it out.

You're definately right about living ror someone ...and yeah you could be right about women being too needy I was just thinking about getting laid without complications but think about it another women falling in love with you god there must be issues there like when you both get menapausal together ....holy shit not worth thinking about