Does he…or doesn’t he?

Hey, Capricorn female here, kind of in a situationship with a married Taurus man. In the beginning I expressed my attraction to him, flirted with him, he would verbally tell me that he was married but give me advice on my soon to be separated marriage. When I would tell him how I wanted him he would tell me I was playing a dangerous game. We met after work, talked, briefly held hands, then I hugged him after, that was all. He would tell me things like he was fantasizing about me in place of his wife on vacations, that he was opening up to the possibility of changing his life path to someone new, would have conversations about what he wanted to do to me. Then my husband found out about him and got very mad and confronted him over the phone. After that he wouldn’t call me anymore because he didn’t want my husband to find out, always has me call him now. And he has said he wants to wait until I move out to really give me physical attention. During this time he would try to stop himself saying he was married, it’s not moral. But phone sex…was a thing. We had been close to being intimate but he’s never kissed me, when I would try he would say “im not there yet.” I’ve tried to push intimacy from day one because I was attracted to him, but he’s always stopped just before, clearly wants to, lets it happen to a point then shuts it down. Says “he’s always willing to help me orgasm, but actually having sex…he can’t do that because he’s married. Which is amusing. He would talk about the future and changing his life path as it was, to another one. I made some mistakes at this point, when he told me I should see someone else, instead of realizing it was a test, I tried to do so in order to not be hurt, and I did become intimate with someone else, his own unmarried, single younger brother. Now he “got over that” and said he could forgive me for it and just never wanted it brought up again. This happened 6 months ago

Then things started changing, he would stop talking about a future, acted like the things he said about changing his life path were never said, considering being physical but says doesn’t want me to get the wrong idea. When I saw things changing He is still preventing me from walking away from the situation. He still is very sexually attracted, still of that weird mindset that he’s willing to talk me into orgasm when I need it and he has time, we talk for hours on the phone, recently 5 hours in one day. Video chat. But I still feel everything is different. I clearly didn’t make the best choices, and he’s reacting to that, but it still seems like he’s waiting to see. I have been changing emotionally lately and growing and he’s noticing that. And I am learning about how a Taurus works from reading things online.

I don’t know how to interpret all that has happened and all that is happening because of how closed off he is, I don’t know how he feels about me. I know he thinks I’m beautiful, very intelligent, says I’m one of a kind and completely unique, has met no one else like me and says he would probably never be able to forget me for the rest of his life.

But at the end of the day, you're not really with him.. and I would leave it at that, unless you'd like to get involved in ruining his marriage. ?

Posted by cap_siren
Hey, Capricorn female here, kind of in a situationship with a married Taurus man. In the beginning I expressed my attraction to him, flirted with him, he would verbally tell me that he was married but give me advice on my soon to be separated marriage. When I would tell him how I wanted him he would tell me I was playing a dangerous game. We met after work, talked, briefly held hands, then I hugged him after, that was all. He would tell me things like he was fantasizing about me in place of his wife on vacations, that he was opening up to the possibility of changing his life path to someone new, would have conversations about what he wanted to do to me. Then my husband found out about him and got very mad and confronted him over the phone. After that he wouldn’t call me anymore because he didn’t want my husband to find out, always has me call him now. And he has said he wants to wait until I move out to really give me physical attention. During this time he would try to stop himself saying he was married, it’s not moral. But phone sex…was a thing. We had been close to being intimate but he’s never kissed me, when I would try he would say “im not there yet.” I’ve tried to push intimacy from day one because I was attracted to him, but he’s always stopped just before, clearly wants to, lets it happen to a point then shuts it down. Says “he’s always willing to help me orgasm, but actually having sex…he can’t do that because he’s married. Which is amusing. He would talk about the future and changing his life path as it was, to another one. I made some mistakes at this point, when he told me I should see someone else, instead of realizing it was a test, I tried to do so in order to not be hurt, and I did become intimate with someone else, his own unmarried, single younger brother. Now he “got over that” and said he could forgive me for it and just never wanted it brought up again. This happened 6 months ago

Then things started changing, he would stop talking about a future, acted like the things he said about changing his life path were never said, considering being physical but says doesn’t want me to get the wrong idea. When I saw things changing He is still preventing me from walking away from the situation. He still is very sexually attracted, still of that weird mindset that he’s willing to talk me into orgasm when I need it and he has time, we talk for hours on the phone, recently 5 hours in one day. Video chat. But I still feel everything is different. I clearly didn’t make the best choices, and he’s reacting to that, but it still seems like he’s waiting to see. I have been changing emotionally lately and growing and he’s noticing that. And I am learning about how a Taurus works from reading things online.

I don’t know how to interpret all that has happened and all that is happening because of how closed off he is, I don’t know how he feels about me. I know he thinks I’m beautiful, very intelligent, says I’m one of a kind and completely unique, has met no one else like me and says he would probably never be able to forget me for the rest of his life.

Bad karma

Stopped reading after the first sentence.

This isn’t serious

Is she a troll....or a psychopath?

Why don't you make this in vocarro and ask what you need to ask or say. For those of us like me who has very little to no attention span to read long walls of text.

I would just date the brother.

Got to the “married” part and stopped reading…..

Wait! She’s married too?? Dead! 🤣

Posted by DMV
I would just date the brother.

bitch date me

lol seems like the people responding to this are trolls. That was my first time even on this site/forum and it’s already been established that you all are a waste of time.

And don't call yourself "siren"

Posted by cap_siren
Hey, Capricorn female here, kind of in a situationship with a married Taurus man. In the beginning I expressed my attraction to him, flirted with him, he would verbally tell me that he was married but give me advice on my soon to be separated marriage. When I would tell him how I wanted him he would tell me I was playing a dangerous game. We met after work, talked, briefly held hands, then I hugged him after, that was all. He would tell me things like he was fantasizing about me in place of his wife on vacations, that he was opening up to the possibility of changing his life path to someone new, would have conversations about what he wanted to do to me. Then my husband found out about him and got very mad and confronted him over the phone. After that he wouldn’t call me anymore because he didn’t want my husband to find out, always has me call him now. And he has said he wants to wait until I move out to really give me physical attention. During this time he would try to stop himself saying he was married, it’s not moral. But phone sex…was a thing. We had been close to being intimate but he’s never kissed me, when I would try he would say “im not there yet.” I’ve tried to push intimacy from day one because I was attracted to him, but he’s always stopped just before, clearly wants to, lets it happen to a point then shuts it down. Says “he’s always willing to help me orgasm, but actually having sex…he can’t do that because he’s married. Which is amusing. He would talk about the future and changing his life path as it was, to another one. I made some mistakes at this point, when he told me I should see someone else, instead of realizing it was a test, I tried to do so in order to not be hurt, and I did become intimate with someone else, his own unmarried, single younger brother. Now he “got over that” and said he could forgive me for it and just never wanted it brought up again. This happened 6 months ago

Then things started changing, he would stop talking about a future, acted like the things he said about changing his life path were never said, considering being physical but says doesn’t want me to get the wrong idea. When I saw things changing He is still preventing me from walking away from the situation. He still is very sexually attracted, still of that weird mindset that he’s willing to talk me into orgasm when I need it and he has time, we talk for hours on the phone, recently 5 hours in one day. Video chat. But I still feel everything is different. I clearly didn’t make the best choices, and he’s reacting to that, but it still seems like he’s waiting to see. I have been changing emotionally lately and growing and he’s noticing that. And I am learning about how a Taurus works from reading things online.

I don’t know how to interpret all that has happened and all that is happening because of how closed off he is, I don’t know how he feels about me. I know he thinks I’m beautiful, very intelligent, says I’m one of a kind and completely unique, has met no one else like me and says he would probably never be able to forget me for the rest of his life.

Tell him to shit or get off the pot.

Let you move forward or he needs to do the things he needs to do for you guys to have the relationship you want.

That's the difference between an affair and something real and you both want to act on.

You are both welcome to love each other as much as you like, just realize their are others involved too.

Taurus can be what some would call greedy🙂

Have their cake and eat it too. Your choice whether you want to be apart of that.

He isn't stopping you from moving on you are your own person. Take responsibility🙂

Low self esteem?

Posted by geminiflyby
Wait! She’s married too?? Dead! 🤣

Can't turn a ho into a housewife, hos don't act right

There's hos on a mission, and there's hos on a crackpipe

Hey ho how ya doin', where ya been?

Prolly doin' ho stuff 'cause there you ho again

Posted by dragonh0rsecvck
Do you have Aries anywhere in your personal planets? Or Cancer since I tend to conflate the 2

Leo rising, Venus in Sag

Posted by CosmicCunt
GO READ YOUR BIBLE!!!

Reply to someone who cares about your opinion

Posted by BadderBunny
Taurus men tend to give a lot of grace to women they catch feelings for, but sleeping with his younger brother may be a deal breaker. He might still lust for you and sleep with you, but never see you as serious relationship material. I mean he can't exactly bring you home to meet the parents after you slept with his brother. If you're okay with being a mistress then continue. But he's probably not going to leave his wife.

I still think you are a troll. But if you're not, then girl pick a struggle. He's married and you slept with his brother, plus you're married too. 🤦🏿‍♀️

Well I was getting seperated long before I met him, my husband and I sleep in different rooms and are both on the same page about ending the marriage when it’s financially convenient to do so. That’s where my marriage is. But obviously my husband seems to still see a sense of ownership over me.

I had met his brother in a separate setting and didn’t initially know it was his brother, but when I found out I should have hightailed it out of there. Even though the brother is single I could never pursue something with him because when I was honest about the fact that I spoke to his older brother so often and had feelings for him, he backed out and said “you belong to my bro, I can’t get inbetween that.”

I was honest with the Taurus about what happened right after it did. I regret it completely and wished I hadn’t done it. His response was telling me that his younger brother wasn’t good enough for me. But yeah, I figure I ruined it completely by doing that. I’ve never slept with the Taurus I love, our physical interaction has been very limited in that way. If he wants just an affair he’s still making it clear he wants to get to know me better before anything physical happens because he claims he holds a lot of meaning to sex and wanted to make sure it’s truly something he wants before he goes there.

I’m not a troll. Just a woman who got herself into a really stupid convoluted situation and made a lot of stupid choices in it along the way. It happens. I have low self esteem despite my looks so it’s hard for me to see who and what I am.

Posted by cap_siren

Posted by BadderBunny
Taurus men tend to give a lot of grace to women they catch feelings for, but sleeping with his younger brother may be a deal breaker. He might still lust for you and sleep with you, but never see you as serious relationship material. I mean he can't exactly bring you home to meet the parents after you slept with his brother. If you're okay with being a mistress then continue. But he's probably not going to leave his wife.
I still think you are a troll. But if you're not, then girl pick a struggle. He's married and you slept with his brother, plus you're married too. 🤦🏿‍♀️

Well I was getting seperated long before I met him, my husband and I sleep in different rooms and are both on the same page about ending the marriage when it’s financially convenient to do so. That’s where my marriage is. But obviously my husband seems to still see a sense of ownership over me.

I had met his brother in a separate setting and didn’t initially know it was his brother, but when I found out I should have hightailed it out of there. Even though the brother is single I could never pursue something with him because when I was honest about the fact that I spoke to his older brother so often and had feelings for him, he backed out and said “you belong to my bro, I can’t get inbetween that.”

I was honest with the Taurus about what happened right after it did. I regret it completely and wished I hadn’t done it. His response was telling me that his younger brother wasn’t good enough for me. But yeah, I figure I ruined it completely by doing that. I’ve never slept with the Taurus I love, our physical interaction has been very limited in that way. If he wants just an affair he’s still making it clear he wants to get to know me better before anything physical happens because he claims he holds a lot of meaning to sex and wanted to make sure it’s truly something he wants before he goes there.

I’m not a troll. Just a woman who got herself into a really stupid convoluted situation and made a lot of stupid choices in it along the way. It happens. I have low self esteem despite my looks so it’s hard for me to see who and what I am.

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Good looking and low self esteem. A DREAM

Posted by CosmicCunt

Posted by cap_siren

Posted by CosmicCunt
GO READ YOUR BIBLE!!!

Reply to someone who cares about your opinion
click to expand

Everyone's had their fun with you by now. I don't think even a Capricorn can be this dense.. you can delete you account in shame and walk away now. Nasty ass

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Your name really fits you. I really hate the word cunt in reference to women being called that, but you are one that I feel deserves it. Go cunt around on someone else’s thread where you are actually wanted.

You will never be more to the Taurus than a wayward woman who is dying to have sex with him. He knows he could never trust you because you've proven that you will cheat on your husband for a piece of ass you want. That is not wife material. I'm not even sure he wants or trusts having sex with you because you act like you are just looking for extra dick. That is dangerous to his health and he doesn't want to take something back to his wife. A suggestion, work harder on getting your finances in order so you can divorce then you can fuck as many men as you desire. Maybe you'll even find a single man who will want you, the married Taurus has proven he doesn't.

Posted by Bandito
If it doesn’t work out with the Taurus, you can always find yourself a dxp boyfriend.

Right? I'm always here for all of you.

Posted by BadderBunny
Taurus men tend to give a lot of grace to women they catch feelings for, but sleeping with his younger brother may be a deal breaker. He might still lust for you and sleep with you, but never see you as serious relationship material. I mean he can't exactly bring you home to meet the parents after you slept with his brother. If you're okay with being a mistress then continue. But he's probably not going to leave his wife.

I still think you are a troll. But if you're not, then girl pick a struggle. He's married and you slept with his brother, plus you're married too. 🤦🏿‍♀️

Sorry I accidentally replied to this under another response. My marriage was going to seperation long before I met this guy. My husband and I sleep in different rooms and are divorcing when it’s financially better to do so. So that’s where “marriage” is. But clearly my soon to be ex husband feels ownership over me still when he reacted the way he did. This Taurus man situation has been going on for almost a year and a half now by the way. And the brother thing, met the brother in a seperate situation and didn’t know it was his brother until later.

Posted by Saturn_Returns

Posted by NotALibra

Posted by cap_siren

Posted by BadderBunny
Taurus men tend to give a lot of grace to women they catch feelings for, but sleeping with his younger brother may be a deal breaker. He might still lust for you and sleep with you, but never see you as serious relationship material. I mean he can't exactly bring you home to meet the parents after you slept with his brother. If you're okay with being a mistress then continue. But he's probably not going to leave his wife.
I still think you are a troll. But if you're not, then girl pick a struggle. He's married and you slept with his brother, plus you're married too. 🤦🏿‍♀️

Well I was getting seperated long before I met him, my husband and I sleep in different rooms and are both on the same page about ending the marriage when it’s financially convenient to do so. That’s where my marriage is. But obviously my husband seems to still see a sense of ownership over me.
I had met his brother in a separate setting and didn’t initially know it was his brother, but when I found out I should have hightailed it out of there. Even though the brother is single I could never pursue something with him because when I was honest about the fact that I spoke to his older brother so often and had feelings for him, he backed out and said “you belong to my bro, I can’t get inbetween that.”
I was honest with the Taurus about what happened right after it did. I regret it completely and wished I hadn’t done it. His response was telling me that his younger brother wasn’t good enough for me. But yeah, I figure I ruined it completely by doing that. I’ve never slept with the Taurus I love, our physical interaction has been very limited in that way. If he wants just an affair he’s still making it clear he wants to get to know me better before anything physical happens because he claims he holds a lot of meaning to sex and wanted to make sure it’s truly something he wants before he goes there.
I’m not a troll. Just a woman who got herself into a really stupid convoluted situation and made a lot of stupid choices in it along the way. It happens. I have low self esteem despite my looks so it’s hard for me to see who and what I am.
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Yeh but if you started the thread with this info about your marriage then you would have gotten better responses. Plus the acknowledgement that you made some bad choices - it paints you in a much better light
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Also known as selective hindsight backpedaling.

AFAIC, the excuse concerning the brother is completely lame. It's not THAT much of a small world!

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They look nothing alike, act nothing alike and do not move in the same circles. Its very much not a small world. Plus I am relatively new to this Southern State, I moved from California.

Posted by Solo

Posted by Bandito
If it doesn’t work out with the Taurus, you can always find yourself a dxp boyfriend.

Right? I'm always here for all of you.

click to expand

I was never looking for and still am not looking for a relationship. I caught feelings in that situation when I wasn’t intending to.

Posted by BadderBunny

Posted by cap_siren

Posted by BadderBunny
Taurus men tend to give a lot of grace to women they catch feelings for, but sleeping with his younger brother may be a deal breaker. He might still lust for you and sleep with you, but never see you as serious relationship material. I mean he can't exactly bring you home to meet the parents after you slept with his brother. If you're okay with being a mistress then continue. But he's probably not going to leave his wife.
I still think you are a troll. But if you're not, then girl pick a struggle. He's married and you slept with his brother, plus you're married too. 🤦🏿‍♀️

Well I was getting seperated long before I met him, my husband and I sleep in different rooms and are both on the same page about ending the marriage when it’s financially convenient to do so. That’s where my marriage is. But obviously my husband seems to still see a sense of ownership over me.

I had met his brother in a separate setting and didn’t initially know it was his brother, but when I found out I should have hightailed it out of there. Even though the brother is single I could never pursue something with him because when I was honest about the fact that I spoke to his older brother so often and had feelings for him, he backed out and said “you belong to my bro, I can’t get inbetween that.”

I was honest with the Taurus about what happened right after it did. I regret it completely and wished I hadn’t done it. His response was telling me that his younger brother wasn’t good enough for me. But yeah, I figure I ruined it completely by doing that. I’ve never slept with the Taurus I love, our physical interaction has been very limited in that way. If he wants just an affair he’s still making it clear he wants to get to know me better before anything physical happens because he claims he holds a lot of meaning to sex and wanted to make sure it’s truly something he wants before he goes there.

I’m not a troll. Just a woman who got herself into a really stupid convoluted situation and made a lot of stupid choices in it along the way. It happens. I have low self esteem despite my looks so it’s hard for me to see who and what I am.
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Man talk about your bad luck of having the guy you date end up being his brother. You deserve better than his brother and him too if he's honest. Notice how he hasnt promised more than to get to know you, which is intentionally vague. He enjoys the fantasy of talking to you, but he isn't willing to risk his marriage by kissing you or engaging in a sexual relationship. In other words, he respects his wife and isnt going to ruin his marriage for some quick sexual conquest.

Most of your post was about your physical and sexual attraction to him and flirting. This seems like infatuation not a romantic connection. Work on building up your self esteem and find a single available man to date that you can have more with than phone sex.

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You right.

Posted by cap_siren

Posted by Solo

Posted by Bandito
If it doesn’t work out with the Taurus, you can always find yourself a dxp boyfriend.

Right? I'm always here for all of you.

I was never looking for and still am not looking for a relationship. I caught feelings in that situation when I wasn’t intending to.

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Kinda seems like you looked for it if you didn't self reflect and say "I shouldn't do this"

Posted by BadderBunny

Posted by cap_siren

Posted by BadderBunny
Taurus men tend to give a lot of grace to women they catch feelings for, but sleeping with his younger brother may be a deal breaker. He might still lust for you and sleep with you, but never see you as serious relationship material. I mean he can't exactly bring you home to meet the parents after you slept with his brother. If you're okay with being a mistress then continue. But he's probably not going to leave his wife.
I still think you are a troll. But if you're not, then girl pick a struggle. He's married and you slept with his brother, plus you're married too. 🤦🏿‍♀️

Sorry I accidentally replied to this under another response. My marriage was going to seperation long before I met this guy. My husband and I sleep in different rooms and are divorcing when it’s financially better to do so. So that’s where “marriage” is. But clearly my soon to be ex husband feels ownership over me still when he reacted the way he did. This Taurus man situation has been going on for almost a year and a half now by the way. And the brother thing, met the brother in a seperate situation and didn’t know it was his brother until later.
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Hey I got both replies from you. No worries.

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But to be honest, I would say there is more to it than the sexual. We talk for hours on the phone about things and it’s never usually sexual. He’s been a huge influence in helping me grow mentally and change things in my life that I needed to change and focus on being a much better version of myself in every way. Pushing towards my goals, teaching me how to budget better and strive for what I want. Also he’s done a lot behind the scenes to get doors open for me in jobs where I didn’t think I had a chance. He’s in a position of authority and influential and he’s used that to benefit me, which I am beyond appreciative of.

Posted by BadderBunny

Posted by cap_siren

Posted by BadderBunny

Posted by cap_siren

Posted by BadderBunny
Taurus men tend to give a lot of grace to women they catch feelings for, but sleeping with his younger brother may be a deal breaker. He might still lust for you and sleep with you, but never see you as serious relationship material. I mean he can't exactly bring you home to meet the parents after you slept with his brother. If you're okay with being a mistress then continue. But he's probably not going to leave his wife.
I still think you are a troll. But if you're not, then girl pick a struggle. He's married and you slept with his brother, plus you're married too. 🤦🏿‍♀️

Sorry I accidentally replied to this under another response. My marriage was going to seperation long before I met this guy. My husband and I sleep in different rooms and are divorcing when it’s financially better to do so. So that’s where “marriage” is. But clearly my soon to be ex husband feels ownership over me still when he reacted the way he did. This Taurus man situation has been going on for almost a year and a half now by the way. And the brother thing, met the brother in a seperate situation and didn’t know it was his brother until later.
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Hey I got both replies from you. No worries.

But to be honest, I would say there is more to it than the sexual. We talk for hours on the phone about things and it’s never usually sexual. He’s been a huge influence in helping me grow mentally and change things in my life that I needed to change and focus on being a much better version of myself in every way. Pushing towards my goals, teaching me how to budget better and strive for what I want. Also he’s done a lot behind the scenes to get doors open for me in jobs where I didn’t think I had a chance. He’s in a position of authority and influential and he’s used that to benefit me, which I am beyond appreciative of.
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He sounds like a great person. But he's not your person. What do you want out of this relationship with him, realistically? Are you hoping for a serious relationship or are you only only interested in a sexual situationship? Either way don't get trapped in that pseudo-romantic zone with him, figure out what you want. Realistically you will end up the mistress because I doubt he plans on leaving his wife. Are you okay with that?

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He’s been emotionally not in his marriage for years, before I came along. But Taurus men like their security, I guess it’s easier to stay in a situation where they’re comfortable and financially invested vs going into the unknown. I just wanted sex in beginning, he is the one who said he doesn’t do one night stands or casual sexual relationships, and he opened the door to a future together where we could be together. That’s what he did initially.

Now almost a year and a half later here we are.

I want to marry him. But I feel like it’s never going to happen. We broke contact off for a month and only just came back to speaking again.

Posted by CosmicCunt

Posted by BadderBunny
Taurus men tend to give a lot of grace to women they catch feelings for, but sleeping with his younger brother may be a deal breaker. He might still lust for you and sleep with you, but never see you as serious relationship material. I mean he can't exactly bring you home to meet the parents after you slept with his brother. If you're okay with being a mistress then continue. But he's probably not going to leave his wife.
I still think you are a troll. But if you're not, then girl pick a struggle. He's married and you slept with his brother, plus you're married too. 🤦🏿‍♀️

Boom!

As a Taurus male! You just nailed it. I could like her as a person, feel sorry for her, try to help her, but I'd never allow the thought of looking my brother eye to eye let me take it even further. She nasty. He's flattered.

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Go away “cunt”.

Posted by BadderBunny

Posted by cap_siren

Posted by BadderBunny

Posted by cap_siren

Posted by BadderBunny

Posted by cap_siren

Posted by BadderBunny
Taurus men tend to give a lot of grace to women they catch feelings for, but sleeping with his younger brother may be a deal breaker. He might still lust for you and sleep with you, but never see you as serious relationship material. I mean he can't exactly bring you home to meet the parents after you slept with his brother. If you're okay with being a mistress then continue. But he's probably not going to leave his wife.
I still think you are a troll. But if you're not, then girl pick a struggle. He's married and you slept with his brother, plus you're married too. 🤦🏿‍♀️

Sorry I accidentally replied to this under another response. My marriage was going to seperation long before I met this guy. My husband and I sleep in different rooms and are divorcing when it’s financially better to do so. So that’s where “marriage” is. But clearly my soon to be ex husband feels ownership over me still when he reacted the way he did. This Taurus man situation has been going on for almost a year and a half now by the way. And the brother thing, met the brother in a seperate situation and didn’t know it was his brother until later.
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Hey I got both replies from you. No worries.

But to be honest, I would say there is more to it than the sexual. We talk for hours on the phone about things and it’s never usually sexual. He’s been a huge influence in helping me grow mentally and change things in my life that I needed to change and focus on being a much better version of myself in every way. Pushing towards my goals, teaching me how to budget better and strive for what I want. Also he’s done a lot behind the scenes to get doors open for me in jobs where I didn’t think I had a chance. He’s in a position of authority and influential and he’s used that to benefit me, which I am beyond appreciative of.
click to expand

He sounds like a great person. But he's not your person. What do you want out of this relationship with him, realistically? Are you hoping for a serious relationship or are you only only interested in a sexual situationship? Either way don't get trapped in that pseudo-romantic zone with him, figure out what you want. Realistically you will end up the mistress because I doubt he plans on leaving his wife. Are you okay with that?

He’s been emotionally not in his marriage for years, before I came along. But Taurus men like their security, I guess it’s easier to stay in a situation where they’re comfortable and financially invested vs going into the unknown. I just wanted sex in beginning, he is the one who said he doesn’t do one night stands or casual sexual relationships, and he opened the door to a future together where we could be together. That’s what he did initially.

Now almost a year and a half later here we are.

I want to marry him. But I feel like it’s never going to happen. We broke contact off for a month and only just came back to speaking again.
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I think you nailed it when you said he will not leave his sense of security. He is getting his emotional needs met with you, and all his other needs met with his wife. What reason does he have to leave? He's comfortable. He drops a few bread crumbs every now and then to keep you hooked, but truthfully he is happy with the status quo. You might get upgraded to sex if you bide your time, but thats it.

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Well damn. I am out of his league in looks and intelligence and here I am groveling for scraps and “may” get “upgraded” to sex. That is very eye opening. Damn.

Bottom line is that this guy is never ever leaving his wife for you but he’s enjoying what you’re doing for his ego in the mean time and will continue to allow it to go on for as long as you’re willing and your self esteem remains low enough to do this to yourself and willfully enjoy getting the “possibility” bread crumbs he’s throwing at you

Posted by dragonh0rsecvck

Posted by cap_sirenWell damn. I am out of his league in looks and intelligence and here I am groveling for scraps and “may” get “upgraded” to sex. That is very eye opening. Damn.

I've been recently trying to push this mindset out of my brain (whether my partner and I are in different leagues) bc when I've felt like he should show more appreciation that I'm "dating down", men make it clear they don't care about looks so much beyond initial attraction and try to put me in me place. also, my sexiest ex who was physically out of my league was often more kind and generous than the others, and spoke to me more gently... might be smart to make looks non-negotiable, or try to scrap the idea of leagues totally

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Yea my experience is that men with legitimate relationship experience don’t care so much about looks when they turn 30ish, because they don’t want to deal with the bullshit that comes with dating a very attractive woman (entitlement, shallowness mostly) and aren’t interested in simping anymore. I noticed a change in date culture around this age. The men who have no relationship experience and stay like a forever teenager in their dating lives do care to a higher degree though and see how that works out for them

Not to say that physical attraction is not important initially - it’s still very important, but dudes don’t genuinely care about snagging the hottest woman in the room past 30 lol. They want loyalty, support, and peace

Posted by dragonh0rsecvck

Posted by cap_sirenWell damn. I am out of his league in looks and intelligence and here I am groveling for scraps and “may” get “upgraded” to sex. That is very eye opening. Damn.

I've been recently trying to push this mindset out of my brain (whether my partner and I are in different leagues) bc when I've felt like he should show more appreciation that I'm "dating down", men make it clear they don't care about looks so much beyond initial attraction and try to put me in me place. also, my sexiest ex who was physically out of my league was often more kind and generous than the others, and spoke to me more gently... might be smart to make looks non-negotiable, or try to scrap the idea of leagues totally

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I don’t look at things that way in general, sadly my low self esteem doesn’t let me see things that way. But I have to force myself to look at it from this perspective to pull myself out of this situation. I was immediately attracted to his intelligence and his looks that I viewed as amazing, those around me didn’t see him as attractive but he was what I liked.

Posted by Solo

Posted by cap_siren

Posted by BadderBunny
Taurus men tend to give a lot of grace to women they catch feelings for, but sleeping with his younger brother may be a deal breaker. He might still lust for you and sleep with you, but never see you as serious relationship material. I mean he can't exactly bring you home to meet the parents after you slept with his brother. If you're okay with being a mistress then continue. But he's probably not going to leave his wife.
I still think you are a troll. But if you're not, then girl pick a struggle. He's married and you slept with his brother, plus you're married too. 🤦🏿‍♀️

Well I was getting seperated long before I met him, my husband and I sleep in different rooms and are both on the same page about ending the marriage when it’s financially convenient to do so. That’s where my marriage is. But obviously my husband seems to still see a sense of ownership over me.
I had met his brother in a separate setting and didn’t initially know it was his brother, but when I found out I should have hightailed it out of there. Even though the brother is single I could never pursue something with him because when I was honest about the fact that I spoke to his older brother so often and had feelings for him, he backed out and said “you belong to my bro, I can’t get inbetween that.”
I was honest with the Taurus about what happened right after it did. I regret it completely and wished I hadn’t done it. His response was telling me that his younger brother wasn’t good enough for me. But yeah, I figure I ruined it completely by doing that. I’ve never slept with the Taurus I love, our physical interaction has been very limited in that way. If he wants just an affair he’s still making it clear he wants to get to know me better before anything physical happens because he claims he holds a lot of meaning to sex and wanted to make sure it’s truly something he wants before he goes there.
I’m not a troll. Just a woman who got herself into a really stupid convoluted situation and made a lot of stupid choices in it along the way. It happens. I have low self esteem despite my looks so it’s hard for me to see who and what I am.
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Good looking and low self esteem. A DREAM

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Wow. I am trying to improve my self esteem so I don’t keep having people like you look at me that way.

Posted by Undine
And don't call yourself "siren"

Go sit in the corner fishy

Posted by cap_siren

Posted by Solo

Posted by cap_siren

Posted by BadderBunny
Taurus men tend to give a lot of grace to women they catch feelings for, but sleeping with his younger brother may be a deal breaker. He might still lust for you and sleep with you, but never see you as serious relationship material. I mean he can't exactly bring you home to meet the parents after you slept with his brother. If you're okay with being a mistress then continue. But he's probably not going to leave his wife.
I still think you are a troll. But if you're not, then girl pick a struggle. He's married and you slept with his brother, plus you're married too. 🤦🏿‍♀️

Well I was getting seperated long before I met him, my husband and I sleep in different rooms and are both on the same page about ending the marriage when it’s financially convenient to do so. That’s where my marriage is. But obviously my husband seems to still see a sense of ownership over me.
I had met his brother in a separate setting and didn’t initially know it was his brother, but when I found out I should have hightailed it out of there. Even though the brother is single I could never pursue something with him because when I was honest about the fact that I spoke to his older brother so often and had feelings for him, he backed out and said “you belong to my bro, I can’t get inbetween that.”
I was honest with the Taurus about what happened right after it did. I regret it completely and wished I hadn’t done it. His response was telling me that his younger brother wasn’t good enough for me. But yeah, I figure I ruined it completely by doing that. I’ve never slept with the Taurus I love, our physical interaction has been very limited in that way. If he wants just an affair he’s still making it clear he wants to get to know me better before anything physical happens because he claims he holds a lot of meaning to sex and wanted to make sure it’s truly something he wants before he goes there.
I’m not a troll. Just a woman who got herself into a really stupid convoluted situation and made a lot of stupid choices in it along the way. It happens. I have low self esteem despite my looks so it’s hard for me to see who and what I am.
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Good looking and low self esteem. A DREAM

Wow. I am trying to improve my self esteem so I don’t keep having people like you look at me that way.

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It was a dark joke. I hope you are able to adjust whatever you need to.

Posted by dragonh0rsecvck

Posted by cap_siren

Posted by dragonh0rsecvck

Posted by cap_sirenWell damn. I am out of his league in looks and intelligence and here I am groveling for scraps and “may” get “upgraded” to sex. That is very eye opening. Damn.

I've been recently trying to push this mindset out of my brain (whether my partner and I are in different leagues) bc when I've felt like he should show more appreciation that I'm "dating down", men make it clear they don't care about looks so much beyond initial attraction and try to put me in me place. also, my sexiest ex who was physically out of my league was often more kind and generous than the others, and spoke to me more gently... might be smart to make looks non-negotiable, or try to scrap the idea of leagues totally

I don’t look at things that way in general, sadly my low self esteem doesn’t let me see things that way. But I have to force myself to look at it from this perspective to pull myself out of this situation. I was immediately attracted to his intelligence and his looks that I viewed as amazing, those around me didn’t see him as attractive but he was what I liked.

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I hear you. I've gotten myself in similar embarrassing binds (having Leo ASC also and Sag moon). Married men, and I think especially married Taurus men are exactly where they wanna be no matter what philandering escapades they tease or undertake. end of the day, none of us wants to cause a divorce. always turn a blind eye to married men. maybe they'll eventually separate without your interference and he'll reach out but more likely you'll move on and regret accepting that treatment. don't worry about kissing his ass to save your job either, for now if he reaches out I'd just say "I can't sell myself short anymore" and keep it super professional

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Yeah I agree with you. In one moment of pure honesty he looked at me and said “Please dont make me do this, if something happens to her, anything, I will find you wherever you are and come to you.” Maybe that’s the only time he’s ever been truly honest with me.

Posted by Solo

Posted by cap_siren

Posted by BadderBunny
Taurus men tend to give a lot of grace to women they catch feelings for, but sleeping with his younger brother may be a deal breaker. He might still lust for you and sleep with you, but never see you as serious relationship material. I mean he can't exactly bring you home to meet the parents after you slept with his brother. If you're okay with being a mistress then continue. But he's probably not going to leave his wife.
I still think you are a troll. But if you're not, then girl pick a struggle. He's married and you slept with his brother, plus you're married too. 🤦🏿‍♀️

Well I was getting seperated long before I met him, my husband and I sleep in different rooms and are both on the same page about ending the marriage when it’s financially convenient to do so. That’s where my marriage is. But obviously my husband seems to still see a sense of ownership over me.
I had met his brother in a separate setting and didn’t initially know it was his brother, but when I found out I should have hightailed it out of there. Even though the brother is single I could never pursue something with him because when I was honest about the fact that I spoke to his older brother so often and had feelings for him, he backed out and said “you belong to my bro, I can’t get inbetween that.”
I was honest with the Taurus about what happened right after it did. I regret it completely and wished I hadn’t done it. His response was telling me that his younger brother wasn’t good enough for me. But yeah, I figure I ruined it completely by doing that. I’ve never slept with the Taurus I love, our physical interaction has been very limited in that way. If he wants just an affair he’s still making it clear he wants to get to know me better before anything physical happens because he claims he holds a lot of meaning to sex and wanted to make sure it’s truly something he wants before he goes there.
I’m not a troll. Just a woman who got herself into a really stupid convoluted situation and made a lot of stupid choices in it along the way. It happens. I have low self esteem despite my looks so it’s hard for me to see who and what I am.
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Good looking and low self esteem. A DREAM

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Usually it’s actually the opposite not good looking why throwing themselves n willing to do anything

Posted by Ballerina
Very intelligent person would not be in this situation or writing this post at all...just saying.

Also, wtf is wrong with you, seriously?!

That is an incredibly ignorant thing to say, hilariously stupid actually. As if in some magic realm you live in, intelligent people don’t make mistakes, don’t fall for the wrong person, aren’t guided by their hearts to do stupid things. Yeah you’re dumb.

Posted by cap_siren

Posted by BadderBunny

Posted by cap_siren

Posted by BadderBunny
Taurus men tend to give a lot of grace to women they catch feelings for, but sleeping with his younger brother may be a deal breaker. He might still lust for you and sleep with you, but never see you as serious relationship material. I mean he can't exactly bring you home to meet the parents after you slept with his brother. If you're okay with being a mistress then continue. But he's probably not going to leave his wife.
I still think you are a troll. But if you're not, then girl pick a struggle. He's married and you slept with his brother, plus you're married too. 🤦🏿‍♀️

Sorry I accidentally replied to this under another response. My marriage was going to seperation long before I met this guy. My husband and I sleep in different rooms and are divorcing when it’s financially better to do so. So that’s where “marriage” is. But clearly my soon to be ex husband feels ownership over me still when he reacted the way he did. This Taurus man situation has been going on for almost a year and a half now by the way. And the brother thing, met the brother in a seperate situation and didn’t know it was his brother until later.
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Hey I got both replies from you. No worries.
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But to be honest, I would say there is more to it than the sexual. We talk for hours on the phone about things and it’s never usually sexual. He’s been a huge influence in helping me grow mentally and change things in my life that I needed to change and focus on being a much better version of myself in every way. Pushing towards my goals, teaching me how to budget better and strive for what I want. Also he’s done a lot behind the scenes to get doors open for me in jobs where I didn’t think I had a chance. He’s in a position of authority and influential and he’s used that to benefit me, which I am beyond appreciative of.

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^^^This part is actually awesome. Though could have done so without the messiness lol

May I ask you a question.

What kind of love do you have for him?

Romantic?

For him as himself?

What you describe, could you guys be best friends under different a setup?

situationship... married man...you're married?!! 5 hour phone sex??!!!

A brother—?

I need a shot.

i'm sure prob a lot of men would display this trait but i've noticed 2 really popular taurus guys where i'm from and they tend to pick girls who are obsessed or just really really into them but cheat with their actual type or women they actually want.

maybe it's a security thing for them so you're prob in luck if you act like you're crazy about them 🤷🤷

Posted by BadderBunny

Posted by virgoOPPP
i'm sure prob a lot of men would display this trait but i've noticed 2 really popular taurus guys where i'm from and they tend to pick girls who are obsessed or just really really into them but cheat with their actual type or women they actually want.
maybe it's a security thing for them so you're prob in luck if you act like you're crazy about them 🤷🤷

And the woman who they actually want treats them like shit! And they will chase her until they die. Venusian male masochism.

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It's true my Taurus brother was married to a Libra who treated him like shit and he was cray cray about her. Now he's with a Scorpio who treats him like shit and he's obsessed with her.

Posted by BadderBunny

Posted by virgoOPPP
i'm sure prob a lot of men would display this trait but i've noticed 2 really popular taurus guys where i'm from and they tend to pick girls who are obsessed or just really really into them but cheat with their actual type or women they actually want.

maybe it's a security thing for them so you're prob in luck if you act like you're crazy about them 🤷🤷

And the woman who they actually want treats them like shit! And they will chase her until they die. Venusian male masochism.

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this taurus guy who won't even help pay nor carry groceries for his scorpio gf of almost a decade (these are well-known people) and cheats on her with their mutual friend who is a taurus chick. and this guy got his own company so it's not like he doesn't have money, just that he doesn't wanna shell out. I feel bad for that taurus chick coz that guy won't pay even for toilet paper but meh she can get her 15 mins of fame from him.

and the other taurus guy also in a relationship for like a decade with this aries chick but travels 'for work' and cheats on her with a different girl every time. he's been nagging her to get married but she always said they're not ready and seems like she's right about that. she got tired of his ways and dumped him.

i think you have to have some kind of leo or 5th house energy in you to become a generous earth sign tbh.

Posted by DonnaLibra

Posted by BadderBunny

Posted by virgoOPPP
i'm sure prob a lot of men would display this trait but i've noticed 2 really popular taurus guys where i'm from and they tend to pick girls who are obsessed or just really really into them but cheat with their actual type or women they actually want.
maybe it's a security thing for them so you're prob in luck if you act like you're crazy about them 🤷🤷

And the woman who they actually want treats them like shit! And they will chase her until they die. Venusian male masochism.
click to expand

It's true my Taurus brother was married to a Libra who treated him like shit and he was cray cray about her. Now he's with a Scorpio who treats him like shit and he's obsessed with her.

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but both these taurus men tho all look like perfect partners on the outside. gentlemanly, protective, sweet, doting, attentive, for the long-term haul and just overall the total package until everything implodes. when they get found out cheating, they expect you to forgive and accept completely because that's what true love and loyalty is.

same with capricorn men tbh. dude cheated on me and basically told me that "i'd just let it go if it's true love." this guy can kiss a frog idgaf.

Posted by BadderBunny

Posted by virgoOPPP

Posted by BadderBunny

Posted by virgoOPPP
i'm sure prob a lot of men would display this trait but i've noticed 2 really popular taurus guys where i'm from and they tend to pick girls who are obsessed or just really really into them but cheat with their actual type or women they actually want.

maybe it's a security thing for them so you're prob in luck if you act like you're crazy about them 🤷🤷

And the woman who they actually want treats them like shit! And they will chase her until they die. Venusian male masochism.

this taurus guy who won't even help pay nor carry groceries for his scorpio gf of almost a decade (these are well-known people) and cheats on her with their mutual friend who is a taurus chick. and this guy got his own company so it's not like he doesn't have money, just that he doesn't wanna shell out. I feel bad for that taurus chick coz that guy won't pay even for toilet paper but meh she can get her 15 mins of fame from him.



and the other taurus guy also in a relationship for like a decade with this aries chick but travels 'for work' and cheats on her with a different girl every time. he's been nagging her to get married but she always said they're not ready and seems like she's right about that. she got tired of his ways and dumped him.



i think you have to have some kind of leo or 5th house energy in you to become a generous earth sign tbh.

How sad 😢. Especially the first guy. Cheating and cheap, eww.

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his scorpio ex was real classy, never bad-mouthed him even tho he totally cheated with someone from their friend group.

taurus men are always in long-term yearsss type relationships. even that guy i used to work with also with an aries chick. always the sweet, child-like type of girls they pick but one time he told me about one of our crazy co-workers straight up propositioning him for sex. he confessed that he did get to her doorstep but just didn't have the heart to cheat. he was tempted and almost gave in.

the fact that that's the most and only deeply personal thing he's ever told me makes me think that's always been on his mind, like it bothers him or maybe he's thinking what if. they rarely choose their obsession to wife up.

Posted by shakedown
If I were in your situation, I would walk away from the entire situation. I fear he may not be able to look at you without seeing his brother. Also, holidays could be a bit awkward. Of course, I could be wrong.

You right. He said he forgave me for it and never wants me to bring it up again but you know it’s always in his mind, especially when he sees or talks to his brother.

Posted by Lostthoughts

Posted by cap_siren

Posted by BadderBunny

Posted by cap_siren

Posted by BadderBunny
Taurus men tend to give a lot of grace to women they catch feelings for, but sleeping with his younger brother may be a deal breaker. He might still lust for you and sleep with you, but never see you as serious relationship material. I mean he can't exactly bring you home to meet the parents after you slept with his brother. If you're okay with being a mistress then continue. But he's probably not going to leave his wife.
I still think you are a troll. But if you're not, then girl pick a struggle. He's married and you slept with his brother, plus you're married too. 🤦🏿‍♀️

Sorry I accidentally replied to this under another response. My marriage was going to seperation long before I met this guy. My husband and I sleep in different rooms and are divorcing when it’s financially better to do so. So that’s where “marriage” is. But clearly my soon to be ex husband feels ownership over me still when he reacted the way he did. This Taurus man situation has been going on for almost a year and a half now by the way. And the brother thing, met the brother in a seperate situation and didn’t know it was his brother until later.
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Hey I got both replies from you. No worries.
click to expand

But to be honest, I would say there is more to it than the sexual. We talk for hours on the phone about things and it’s never usually sexual. He’s been a huge influence in helping me grow mentally and change things in my life that I needed to change and focus on being a much better version of myself in every way. Pushing towards my goals, teaching me how to budget better and strive for what I want. Also he’s done a lot behind the scenes to get doors open for me in jobs where I didn’t think I had a chance. He’s in a position of authority and influential and he’s used that to benefit me, which I am beyond appreciative of.
click to expand

^^^This part is actually awesome. Though could have done so without the messiness lol

May I ask you a question.

What kind of love do you have for him?

Romantic?

For him as himself?

What you describe, could you guys be best friends under different a setup?

click to expand

Honestly if you set the romantic and sexual stuff aside he really was my best friend. I would cry to him when something horrible happened and he would always, daily remind me how intelligent and amazing I was and capable of achieving anything I wanted. And he would get pissed when I would squander opportunities in my life and got really angry when people would hurt me or seek to be assholes just because I was outspoken and really caring in situations. When I worked at the same place as him he champion social justice causes that were unpopular but very necessary and he grew a huge respect for me without ever meeting just hearing and seeing these things that I would do and say.

So yeah, I think if the other stuff weren’t a factor we could be amazing friends. But how does that go away? How do we magically pretend it isn’t there or was never there? Is it even possible? When he’s fighting against his feelings he talks about building our friendship and making it grow. But within that friendship there’s always things that shouldn’t be in a friendship…