Broke up with Aquarius after an intense telenovela-like relationship. Did it really end?

I hate sounding so clingy. But I am. I'm a cancer and have been with this aquarius for 6 years.

He is an amazing guy, but he is one of the strangest guys I've ever met.

When we started dating everything was fireworks, everywhere: in bed, on the street, between friends, everywhere! It was so intense, that he actually moved in with me on our first date and never left. We were spending all our free time together. But about 3 weeks after we started dating he came to my place one evening super sad that he misses his ex.

Fast forward one year later when the initial honeymoon of our relationship faded and he started seeing the real me: I'm lazy, I don't have his level of energy, I am a night owl, he is super active during the mornings, etc. This time we were living in his apartment. We planned a trip together with some other friends, but we had a fight so he left alone. He acted as if everything is over, like he is breaking up with me. So when he was away I took all my things and left. When he came back he was shocked I actually left but did not pursue me. After about one week, because I started missing him like crazy, I went to his apartment one night trying to get back together with him, but he completely refused - later on I found out that he was trying to hook up with his ex. 3 days later he called me crying he wants to get back together - later I found out the ex refused to get back together with him.

Fast forward 5 years to today. He just turned 41 in january, and starting around september - october last year I sensed something was not okay with him. He was not enjoying himself as much as he used to - a proper midlife crisis.

We planned to go to Rio de Janeiro for 2 months just immediately after Christmas, so we did. He was weird there. We had some fights where he told me he will pack his bags and leave, but every time he decided not to. 2 weeks before our trip was over he came back home from the beach with our friends one day, but he forgot to take his keys with him. I was watching some movie and I did not hear him knocking - the apartment we stayed in was pretty big. My phone was on silent so I didn't hear him knocking. He spent about 25 minutes in front of the door and by the time I opened, he was so so mad that I thought he would kill me. He calmed down and later on acted completely normal.

During the evening he asked me to go to get some things from the supermarket, so I did. When I came back he told me he is going to meet with some friends and will be back in 1 hour. After 1 hour I prepared dinner and I texted him asking when he is coming. He replied he is in the airport almost boarding the flight to go back home to Europe. That he is in a depression and he wants to go home to his parents and cool off. I was really scared so I told him to go do his thing and I will take care of everything (we had friends visiting us in Rio). After he boarded the 12 hour flight, I started panicking - what do you mean he is going home? Did he meet someone else? He wants to break up with me? By the time he landed I sent him a ton of messages saying I will fly home as well - I cannot leave him alone during this difficult time - I actually bought plane tickets too. He responded in a very cold way that I can do whatever I want but he would prefer that I stayed in Rio - he needs space. So I stayed in Rio.

3 days later he sent me a message telling me that he is feeling better and he is coming back. I was like - hey, there's only like 10 days left to stay in Rio, why would you travel so much for a few days when we spent already almost 2 months in Rio. He insisted he wants to come back. He called me and I asked what happened - he said he will tell me in Rio.

When he came back, as we were returning home in an Uber from the airport, I asked him - so what happened? He had a very furious reply, he said - Again with all the questions? I was disappointed and paranoic. What was he hiding? When he paid at the restaurant the first time and he took his wallet out, instead of taking out his credit card, he took out of his wallet a Hilton access card - he didn't stay at his parents, he didn't go back to our home - he stayed at a hotel.

We spent the rest of our vacation me trying to find out what happened - I making stupid jokes like - whats her name? I even read a small part of some text exchanges he did with his best friend. He was telling his best friend that he needs to be a good boy for a while otherwise I will become suspicious and start digging. And his friend replied that this is the moment where I should leave him alone, if only I knew how serious it is.

And it completely drove me crazy - I spent the remaining days in complete paranoia - what was he hiding?

He was so so sad, I never saw him like that. The next day after we got home he went to work, and just as we got back home, I was going out for a run. I asked him jokingly if he prepared something special for that day - he asked what day is today? And I told him - its our anniversary - we were turning 6 years old that day. He said he forgot.

And it was true, he never remembered "special" days. Im surprised he ever remembered my birthday. So I went for a run and came back after an hour. I sat next to him and asked him - so what are we doing on this special day? He looked at me with the most ironic smile, and bursted out laughing. I just sat, and left the house because I was too disappointed. He texted me saying he wants to move out the next day because he needs some space.

I didnt go home that night and the next day he was out. Its been 2 weeks and a few days ago he emailed me in a very cold detached way that he wants to move on, and I should move on, people brake up its no big deal. I replied that I cannot pressure him into staying with me so I give up. He insisted that he is not with anyone else, and all the evidence show he didn't go running after someone else.

Ive been devastated ever since and just texted him a few times that its been an amazing relationship and its shame we should waste 6 years. Mutual friends told me is in a horrible state of mind, and one of his employees who is a good friend of mine told me she never saw him so down.

We have 2 businesses together, and we always had an amazing connection, but looking back he started feeling down in the last 6 months. And I keep wondering - is it a depression, or is it a depression because he realised he doesn't love me anymore?

I am not expecting you guys to know what is going through his head, but it would really help me if you would give me some insight. Im just hoping he just needs some time off and he will come back... His best friend told me that he thinks he will come back to his senses in maximum 3 months, although he doesn't think it will last more than a month, and that the best thing I can do now is to leave him alone.

What do you think?

nothing? 😢

Whether or not it is depression, or we theorize on intent/ feelings, his actions total reflect selfishness, shortness. Not in a good phase in his life. However, yeah yeah he has good things too. This is said to everyone. Its about whether or not his bads are really good for you.

Move on girl, distance.

No idea what is going through his mind but when HE TOLD YOU THAT HE MISSED HIS EX, the 1st time, you SHOULD'VE KNOWN it would be a roller coaster for you.

You avoided every sign he gave you.

Life is too short for bullshit like this. If you can't fix it, make an exit plan

Posted by sweetpea2977

No idea what is going through his mind but when HE TOLD YOU THAT HE MISSED HIS EX, the 1st time, you SHOULD'VE KNOWN it would be a roller coaster for you.

You avoided every sign he gave you.

Oh my gosh this was my thought too. It was almost like you guys manipulated each other the whole time. It’s like he was using you to get over his ex then film love them feel guilty when he wanted to leave. Then was manipulated multiple times by you to stay. Then you both just ended up in this toxic soup. I’m sure they’re probably was good times but this looks like all of the signs of a plutonic relationship. He sounds Uber selfish. Also I have a suspicion that after you up and left that first time when he went on that trip by himself even though he was a asshole for that he was probably getting his revenge on you the whole time from that. Probably never expected you to be capable of that And use it as an excuse to do other things later. Fixed signs don’t forget. Again this is just my opinion you lived this relationship so only you truly know. But I would say leave his ass where he is and heal and if he comes back have a clear head about what you want and ask yourself if you can really deal with that shit again. Also write A book lol but no seriously it might help you to heal and honestly I don’t think you realize it yet but this relationship was very tramatuc and co-dependent for you. You definitely don’t want to bring the same energy into your next relationship so take your time to heal and ask yourself why you put up with certain things.

Posted by Black-Mamba

Also how old are you, i hope your EGGS aren't dying while you waiting for this SCRUB

👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽