Posted by lisabethur8Sounds like you've been thru more than I can imagine.Posted by Leo188881we are always confrontational and confront stuff with everything..that's why it's easily "fixed"Posted by lisabethur8Posted by Leo188881for myself i "fix" things on my own. i dont like to impose on other people. it's not my way. when i was suffering i never told anyone, i just prayed alot and cried.Posted by Gemgal101Posted by Leo188881Thank you. Guess just wait until he gets back and talk face to face. Still a couple of weeks away for that to happen but hope can just keep it together until then. Just hate being in limbo but that's partially my fault I guess...Posted by Gemgal101An ultimatum is giving one choice and a threat... if you don't make more time and effort for me, I'm going to leave you or find someone elsePosted by Leo188881Sorry to be a pain but..Posted by Gemgal101Posted by Leo188881I came to this forum to try to get a better understanding of who he is because I've never met anyone like him. It's helped me understand that what he does day to day is what is seen in other Aquarian too but I hear what your saying in that I should treat him like a regular guy and not feel like I can't say what I need to say for fear of him walking away. The last few weeks before he left were horrible for me because I did feel like we kinda broke up without breaking up. I love him very much and I can't just switch off like he can but I can't keep feeling like this. I am expecting this to not end well in the sense that he'll just want friendship and be quite aloof about it but feeling lonely in a relationship (even an unofficial one) hurts.Posted by Gemgal101What you do depends on how prepared you are to lose him. If it hurts more to feel lonely in your relationship, than it is to be alone and single, maybe it's worth making a hard decision. You can try giving him the option of either stepping up to be the man you deserve or letting you go to set you free. It might hurt and you might not get what you hoped for, but it's something to consider. I think I'm getting close to this point with my Aqua too. I feel like I hold back telling him how I'm feeling because i read too much about his stupid star sign and I've tried to accept the Aqua aloofness instead of treating him like a regular guy that's being inconsiderate or cold.
I appreciate everyone's input here. I'm so lost I still don't know what to do. I guess I have to decide what I need to do for me which might not be what I want....I'm just very emotionally exhausted at the moment...
Don't always get what you want...😢
.
I have been patient and never given ultimatums but I think I need to make a decision sooner rather than later.
I wish you luck with your situation and hope it goes the way you want it too..
If you do decide to do it, you can try to do it in a way so that you're letting him make a decision, rather than you making a threat to leave if he doesn't act a certain way or choose a certain course. That way it's not as aggressive as an ultimatum because he has a choice and gets to decide the outcome.
Aquas are hard work and so confusing. I thought i loved mine too, but now I'm thinking i was in love with the idea of love, and the more i think about it, the more i realise there's not much to like if i am always uncertain of where i stand or if I'm not feeling important to him. It really feels like he doesn't even care except for the times we're physically with each other which isn't often because he works so much.
I'm not sure I'm ready to give up yet because i think deep down he does care and i want to try to dig it out so I'll try a little longer but in the end, you need to figure out how many of your needs are actually being met by this man and if you can live with that, or if you're better off with someone who values your happiness as much as their own.
Can you give me an example of how to do it so he is making the decision?
Options means he has 2 choices... do you want to continue to see me, and work towards a future together or would you like us to go our separate ways?
If he responds with i don't know, you will need to decide if you want to give him time to think about it and decide or if you want to tell him that if he's not sure about you, then to let you go because holding on to uncertainty and having no direction hurts too much and is unfair on you.
Uncertainty sucks. You just have to keep yourself occupied until then I guess.
Sometimes I wonder if Aquas even consider the other person... i was thinking about how many people use this site asking what to do in their relationship or why their partner is acting a certain way and how to fix things or what to say. Aquas on the other hand, don't seem to ask for relationship advice. It's like their partner is expected to adapt to them without compromise. It's mysterious and fascinating yet irritating and frustrating.
and then stuff fell thrugh.
i never tell a soul.
cause i'm too ashamed to tell the world of the pain and suffering.
so i hold all the pain and suffering inside. it's how i was.
i'm good though, no pain and suffering...but if you really want to know the truth..i dont tell peeps.
If you're upset in your relationship, do you tell your partner what is bothering you to give him an opportunity to work on it with you, or do you just withdraw into yourself and allow them to walk away without ever really knowing that deep down you cared but couldn't show it?
if you let stuff fester you will never resolve stuff and it is not good and will break anyone's relationship.
you will always keep it deep inside.
you must always be open and honest and not go to anyone else. it should always be to eachother. that's why its called a relationshp. it's a relationship together not with other peeps.
but in the past i couldnt do that because it's hard to resolve drug addiction heroin addict alcoholism when the other person doens't want, or abuse because you are taught that if you talk about it and confront you're gonna get a punch in the face and a beating.click to expand
Posted by Gemgal101Posted by lisabethur8I've done that all my life. Tried to deal with whatever it is on my own. No one would know what I was going thru. Think that's why I came here to divulge to people I have never met to hopefully be truthful and honest and not necessarily give answers (although sometimes I wish I had them) but to offer advice and suggestions and support I guess. I have reached my ultimate point of emotional exhaustion. I'm a mess to be honest and I needed to talk to someone or in this case many of you. :-)Posted by Leo188881for myself i "fix" things on my own. i dont like to impose on other people. it's not my way. when i was suffering i never told anyone, i just prayed alot and cried.Posted by Gemgal101Posted by Leo188881Thank you. Guess just wait until he gets back and talk face to face. Still a couple of weeks away for that to happen but hope can just keep it together until then. Just hate being in limbo but that's partially my fault I guess...Posted by Gemgal101An ultimatum is giving one choice and a threat... if you don't make more time and effort for me, I'm going to leave you or find someone elsePosted by Leo188881Sorry to be a pain but..Posted by Gemgal101Posted by Leo188881I came to this forum to try to get a better understanding of who he is because I've never met anyone like him. It's helped me understand that what he does day to day is what is seen in other Aquarian too but I hear what your saying in that I should treat him like a regular guy and not feel like I can't say what I need to say for fear of him walking away. The last few weeks before he left were horrible for me because I did feel like we kinda broke up without breaking up. I love him very much and I can't just switch off like he can but I can't keep feeling like this. I am expecting this to not end well in the sense that he'll just want friendship and be quite aloof about it but feeling lonely in a relationship (even an unofficial one) hurts.Posted by Gemgal101What you do depends on how prepared you are to lose him. If it hurts more to feel lonely in your relationship, than it is to be alone and single, maybe it's worth making a hard decision. You can try giving him the option of either stepping up to be the man you deserve or letting you go to set you free. It might hurt and you might not get what you hoped for, but it's something to consider. I think I'm getting close to this point with my Aqua too. I feel like I hold back telling him how I'm feeling because i read too much about his stupid star sign and I've tried to accept the Aqua aloofness instead of treating him like a regular guy that's being inconsiderate or cold.
I appreciate everyone's input here. I'm so lost I still don't know what to do. I guess I have to decide what I need to do for me which might not be what I want....I'm just very emotionally exhausted at the moment...
Don't always get what you want...😢
.
I have been patient and never given ultimatums but I think I need to make a decision sooner rather than later.
I wish you luck with your situation and hope it goes the way you want it too..
If you do decide to do it, you can try to do it in a way so that you're letting him make a decision, rather than you making a threat to leave if he doesn't act a certain way or choose a certain course. That way it's not as aggressive as an ultimatum because he has a choice and gets to decide the outcome.
Aquas are hard work and so confusing. I thought i loved mine too, but now I'm thinking i was in love with the idea of love, and the more i think about it, the more i realise there's not much to like if i am always uncertain of where i stand or if I'm not feeling important to him. It really feels like he doesn't even care except for the times we're physically with each other which isn't often because he works so much.
I'm not sure I'm ready to give up yet because i think deep down he does care and i want to try to dig it out so I'll try a little longer but in the end, you need to figure out how many of your needs are actually being met by this man and if you can live with that, or if you're better off with someone who values your happiness as much as their own.
Can you give me an example of how to do it so he is making the decision?
Options means he has 2 choices... do you want to continue to see me, and work towards a future together or would you like us to go our separate ways?
If he responds with i don't know, you will need to decide if you want to give him time to think about it and decide or if you want to tell him that if he's not sure about you, then to let you go because holding on to uncertainty and having no direction hurts too much and is unfair on you.
Uncertainty sucks. You just have to keep yourself occupied until then I guess.
Sometimes I wonder if Aquas even consider the other person... i was thinking about how many people use this site asking what to do in their relationship or why their partner is acting a certain way and how to fix things or what to say. Aquas on the other hand, don't seem to ask for relationship advice. It's like their partner is expected to adapt to them without compromise. It's mysterious and fascinating yet irritating and frustrating.
and then stuff fell thrugh.
i never tell a soul.
cause i'm too ashamed to tell the world of the pain and suffering.
so i hold all the pain and suffering inside. it's how i was.
i'm good though, no pain and suffering...but if you really want to know the truth..i dont tell peeps.
click to expand
Posted by Leo188881I'm scared of the response and reaction. I spoke to him today (he called me) and after small talk he asked if I was ok and of course my response was "yes" but inside I just wanted to blurt it all out. Just don't think I should do it whilst he's away but also means me churning my stomach inside out for another 2 weeks..🙁Posted by lisabethur8Posted by Leo188881for myself i "fix" things on my own. i dont like to impose on other people. it's not my way. when i was suffering i never told anyone, i just prayed alot and cried.Posted by Gemgal101Posted by Leo188881Thank you. Guess just wait until he gets back and talk face to face. Still a couple of weeks away for that to happen but hope can just keep it together until then. Just hate being in limbo but that's partially my fault I guess...Posted by Gemgal101An ultimatum is giving one choice and a threat... if you don't make more time and effort for me, I'm going to leave you or find someone elsePosted by Leo188881Sorry to be a pain but..Posted by Gemgal101Posted by Leo188881I came to this forum to try to get a better understanding of who he is because I've never met anyone like him. It's helped me understand that what he does day to day is what is seen in other Aquarian too but I hear what your saying in that I should treat him like a regular guy and not feel like I can't say what I need to say for fear of him walking away. The last few weeks before he left were horrible for me because I did feel like we kinda broke up without breaking up. I love him very much and I can't just switch off like he can but I can't keep feeling like this. I am expecting this to not end well in the sense that he'll just want friendship and be quite aloof about it but feeling lonely in a relationship (even an unofficial one) hurts.Posted by Gemgal101What you do depends on how prepared you are to lose him. If it hurts more to feel lonely in your relationship, than it is to be alone and single, maybe it's worth making a hard decision. You can try giving him the option of either stepping up to be the man you deserve or letting you go to set you free. It might hurt and you might not get what you hoped for, but it's something to consider. I think I'm getting close to this point with my Aqua too. I feel like I hold back telling him how I'm feeling because i read too much about his stupid star sign and I've tried to accept the Aqua aloofness instead of treating him like a regular guy that's being inconsiderate or cold.
I appreciate everyone's input here. I'm so lost I still don't know what to do. I guess I have to decide what I need to do for me which might not be what I want....I'm just very emotionally exhausted at the moment...
Don't always get what you want...😢
.
I have been patient and never given ultimatums but I think I need to make a decision sooner rather than later.
I wish you luck with your situation and hope it goes the way you want it too..
If you do decide to do it, you can try to do it in a way so that you're letting him make a decision, rather than you making a threat to leave if he doesn't act a certain way or choose a certain course. That way it's not as aggressive as an ultimatum because he has a choice and gets to decide the outcome.
Aquas are hard work and so confusing. I thought i loved mine too, but now I'm thinking i was in love with the idea of love, and the more i think about it, the more i realise there's not much to like if i am always uncertain of where i stand or if I'm not feeling important to him. It really feels like he doesn't even care except for the times we're physically with each other which isn't often because he works so much.
I'm not sure I'm ready to give up yet because i think deep down he does care and i want to try to dig it out so I'll try a little longer but in the end, you need to figure out how many of your needs are actually being met by this man and if you can live with that, or if you're better off with someone who values your happiness as much as their own.
Can you give me an example of how to do it so he is making the decision?
Options means he has 2 choices... do you want to continue to see me, and work towards a future together or would you like us to go our separate ways?
If he responds with i don't know, you will need to decide if you want to give him time to think about it and decide or if you want to tell him that if he's not sure about you, then to let you go because holding on to uncertainty and having no direction hurts too much and is unfair on you.
Uncertainty sucks. You just have to keep yourself occupied until then I guess.
Sometimes I wonder if Aquas even consider the other person... i was thinking about how many people use this site asking what to do in their relationship or why their partner is acting a certain way and how to fix things or what to say. Aquas on the other hand, don't seem to ask for relationship advice. It's like their partner is expected to adapt to them without compromise. It's mysterious and fascinating yet irritating and frustrating.
and then stuff fell thrugh.
i never tell a soul.
cause i'm too ashamed to tell the world of the pain and suffering.
so i hold all the pain and suffering inside. it's how i was.
i'm good though, no pain and suffering...but if you really want to know the truth..i dont tell peeps.
If you're upset in your relationship, do you tell your partner what is bothering you to give him an opportunity to work on it with you, or do you just withdraw into yourself and allow them to walk away without ever really knowing that deep down you cared but couldn't show it?
click to expand
Posted by Gemgal101Posted by Leo188881I'm scared of the response and reaction. I spoke to him today (he called me) and after small talk he asked if I was ok and of course my response was "yes" but inside I just wanted to blurt it all out. Just don't think I should do it whilst he's away but also means me churning my stomach inside out for another 2 weeks..🙁Posted by lisabethur8Posted by Leo188881for myself i "fix" things on my own. i dont like to impose on other people. it's not my way. when i was suffering i never told anyone, i just prayed alot and cried.Posted by Gemgal101Posted by Leo188881Thank you. Guess just wait until he gets back and talk face to face. Still a couple of weeks away for that to happen but hope can just keep it together until then. Just hate being in limbo but that's partially my fault I guess...Posted by Gemgal101An ultimatum is giving one choice and a threat... if you don't make more time and effort for me, I'm going to leave you or find someone elsePosted by Leo188881Sorry to be a pain but..Posted by Gemgal101Posted by Leo188881I came to this forum to try to get a better understanding of who he is because I've never met anyone like him. It's helped me understand that what he does day to day is what is seen in other Aquarian too but I hear what your saying in that I should treat him like a regular guy and not feel like I can't say what I need to say for fear of him walking away. The last few weeks before he left were horrible for me because I did feel like we kinda broke up without breaking up. I love him very much and I can't just switch off like he can but I can't keep feeling like this. I am expecting this to not end well in the sense that he'll just want friendship and be quite aloof about it but feeling lonely in a relationship (even an unofficial one) hurts.Posted by Gemgal101What you do depends on how prepared you are to lose him. If it hurts more to feel lonely in your relationship, than it is to be alone and single, maybe it's worth making a hard decision. You can try giving him the option of either stepping up to be the man you deserve or letting you go to set you free. It might hurt and you might not get what you hoped for, but it's something to consider. I think I'm getting close to this point with my Aqua too. I feel like I hold back telling him how I'm feeling because i read too much about his stupid star sign and I've tried to accept the Aqua aloofness instead of treating him like a regular guy that's being inconsiderate or cold.
I appreciate everyone's input here. I'm so lost I still don't know what to do. I guess I have to decide what I need to do for me which might not be what I want....I'm just very emotionally exhausted at the moment...
Don't always get what you want...😢
.
I have been patient and never given ultimatums but I think I need to make a decision sooner rather than later.
I wish you luck with your situation and hope it goes the way you want it too..
If you do decide to do it, you can try to do it in a way so that you're letting him make a decision, rather than you making a threat to leave if he doesn't act a certain way or choose a certain course. That way it's not as aggressive as an ultimatum because he has a choice and gets to decide the outcome.
Aquas are hard work and so confusing. I thought i loved mine too, but now I'm thinking i was in love with the idea of love, and the more i think about it, the more i realise there's not much to like if i am always uncertain of where i stand or if I'm not feeling important to him. It really feels like he doesn't even care except for the times we're physically with each other which isn't often because he works so much.
I'm not sure I'm ready to give up yet because i think deep down he does care and i want to try to dig it out so I'll try a little longer but in the end, you need to figure out how many of your needs are actually being met by this man and if you can live with that, or if you're better off with someone who values your happiness as much as their own.
Can you give me an example of how to do it so he is making the decision?
Options means he has 2 choices... do you want to continue to see me, and work towards a future together or would you like us to go our separate ways?
If he responds with i don't know, you will need to decide if you want to give him time to think about it and decide or if you want to tell him that if he's not sure about you, then to let you go because holding on to uncertainty and having no direction hurts too much and is unfair on you.
Uncertainty sucks. You just have to keep yourself occupied until then I guess.
Sometimes I wonder if Aquas even consider the other person... i was thinking about how many people use this site asking what to do in their relationship or why their partner is acting a certain way and how to fix things or what to say. Aquas on the other hand, don't seem to ask for relationship advice. It's like their partner is expected to adapt to them without compromise. It's mysterious and fascinating yet irritating and frustrating.
and then stuff fell thrugh.
i never tell a soul.
cause i'm too ashamed to tell the world of the pain and suffering.
so i hold all the pain and suffering inside. it's how i was.
i'm good though, no pain and suffering...but if you really want to know the truth..i dont tell peeps.
If you're upset in your relationship, do you tell your partner what is bothering you to give him an opportunity to work on it with you, or do you just withdraw into yourself and allow them to walk away without ever really knowing that deep down you cared but couldn't show it?
click to expand
Posted by lisabethur8He knows i want more of a commitment and to be honest if he wanted to keep it all secret as it has been but know that in a way we are exclusive to one another, I could do that but it's just the fact that he made the point to ask me recently if I still wanted to keep seeing him knowing that he might want to be with other people as he has had a couple of opportunities to do so but didn't because of me.Posted by Gemgal101Posted by lisabethur8I've done that all my life. Tried to deal with whatever it is on my own. No one would know what I was going thru. Think that's why I came here to divulge to people I have never met to hopefully be truthful and honest and not necessarily give answers (although sometimes I wish I had them) but to offer advice and suggestions and support I guess. I have reached my ultimate point of emotional exhaustion. I'm a mess to be honest and I needed to talk to someone or in this case many of you. :-)Posted by Leo188881for myself i "fix" things on my own. i dont like to impose on other people. it's not my way. when i was suffering i never told anyone, i just prayed alot and cried.Posted by Gemgal101Posted by Leo188881Thank you. Guess just wait until he gets back and talk face to face. Still a couple of weeks away for that to happen but hope can just keep it together until then. Just hate being in limbo but that's partially my fault I guess...Posted by Gemgal101An ultimatum is giving one choice and a threat... if you don't make more time and effort for me, I'm going to leave you or find someone elsePosted by Leo188881Sorry to be a pain but..Posted by Gemgal101Posted by Leo188881I came to this forum to try to get a better understanding of who he is because I've never met anyone like him. It's helped me understand that what he does day to day is what is seen in other Aquarian too but I hear what your saying in that I should treat him like a regular guy and not feel like I can't say what I need to say for fear of him walking away. The last few weeks before he left were horrible for me because I did feel like we kinda broke up without breaking up. I love him very much and I can't just switch off like he can but I can't keep feeling like this. I am expecting this to not end well in the sense that he'll just want friendship and be quite aloof about it but feeling lonely in a relationship (even an unofficial one) hurts.Posted by Gemgal101What you do depends on how prepared you are to lose him. If it hurts more to feel lonely in your relationship, than it is to be alone and single, maybe it's worth making a hard decision. You can try giving him the option of either stepping up to be the man you deserve or letting you go to set you free. It might hurt and you might not get what you hoped for, but it's something to consider. I think I'm getting close to this point with my Aqua too. I feel like I hold back telling him how I'm feeling because i read too much about his stupid star sign and I've tried to accept the Aqua aloofness instead of treating him like a regular guy that's being inconsiderate or cold.
I appreciate everyone's input here. I'm so lost I still don't know what to do. I guess I have to decide what I need to do for me which might not be what I want....I'm just very emotionally exhausted at the moment...
Don't always get what you want...😢
.
I have been patient and never given ultimatums but I think I need to make a decision sooner rather than later.
I wish you luck with your situation and hope it goes the way you want it too..
If you do decide to do it, you can try to do it in a way so that you're letting him make a decision, rather than you making a threat to leave if he doesn't act a certain way or choose a certain course. That way it's not as aggressive as an ultimatum because he has a choice and gets to decide the outcome.
Aquas are hard work and so confusing. I thought i loved mine too, but now I'm thinking i was in love with the idea of love, and the more i think about it, the more i realise there's not much to like if i am always uncertain of where i stand or if I'm not feeling important to him. It really feels like he doesn't even care except for the times we're physically with each other which isn't often because he works so much.
I'm not sure I'm ready to give up yet because i think deep down he does care and i want to try to dig it out so I'll try a little longer but in the end, you need to figure out how many of your needs are actually being met by this man and if you can live with that, or if you're better off with someone who values your happiness as much as their own.
Can you give me an example of how to do it so he is making the decision?
Options means he has 2 choices... do you want to continue to see me, and work towards a future together or would you like us to go our separate ways?
If he responds with i don't know, you will need to decide if you want to give him time to think about it and decide or if you want to tell him that if he's not sure about you, then to let you go because holding on to uncertainty and having no direction hurts too much and is unfair on you.
Uncertainty sucks. You just have to keep yourself occupied until then I guess.
Sometimes I wonder if Aquas even consider the other person... i was thinking about how many people use this site asking what to do in their relationship or why their partner is acting a certain way and how to fix things or what to say. Aquas on the other hand, don't seem to ask for relationship advice. It's like their partner is expected to adapt to them without compromise. It's mysterious and fascinating yet irritating and frustrating.
and then stuff fell thrugh.
i never tell a soul.
cause i'm too ashamed to tell the world of the pain and suffering.
so i hold all the pain and suffering inside. it's how i was.
i'm good though, no pain and suffering...but if you really want to know the truth..i dont tell peeps.
what is it exactly do you want from him? just tell him what you want.click to expand
Posted by lisabethur8Now do it..like while he's on holidays?Posted by Gemgal101Posted by Leo188881I'm scared of the response and reaction. I spoke to him today (he called me) and after small talk he asked if I was ok and of course my response was "yes" but inside I just wanted to blurt it all out. Just don't think I should do it whilst he's away but also means me churning my stomach inside out for another 2 weeks..🙁Posted by lisabethur8Posted by Leo188881for myself i "fix" things on my own. i dont like to impose on other people. it's not my way. when i was suffering i never told anyone, i just prayed alot and cried.Posted by Gemgal101Posted by Leo188881Thank you. Guess just wait until he gets back and talk face to face. Still a couple of weeks away for that to happen but hope can just keep it together until then. Just hate being in limbo but that's partially my fault I guess...Posted by Gemgal101An ultimatum is giving one choice and a threat... if you don't make more time and effort for me, I'm going to leave you or find someone elsePosted by Leo188881Sorry to be a pain but..Posted by Gemgal101Posted by Leo188881I came to this forum to try to get a better understanding of who he is because I've never met anyone like him. It's helped me understand that what he does day to day is what is seen in other Aquarian too but I hear what your saying in that I should treat him like a regular guy and not feel like I can't say what I need to say for fear of him walking away. The last few weeks before he left were horrible for me because I did feel like we kinda broke up without breaking up. I love him very much and I can't just switch off like he can but I can't keep feeling like this. I am expecting this to not end well in the sense that he'll just want friendship and be quite aloof about it but feeling lonely in a relationship (even an unofficial one) hurts.Posted by Gemgal101What you do depends on how prepared you are to lose him. If it hurts more to feel lonely in your relationship, than it is to be alone and single, maybe it's worth making a hard decision. You can try giving him the option of either stepping up to be the man you deserve or letting you go to set you free. It might hurt and you might not get what you hoped for, but it's something to consider. I think I'm getting close to this point with my Aqua too. I feel like I hold back telling him how I'm feeling because i read too much about his stupid star sign and I've tried to accept the Aqua aloofness instead of treating him like a regular guy that's being inconsiderate or cold.
I appreciate everyone's input here. I'm so lost I still don't know what to do. I guess I have to decide what I need to do for me which might not be what I want....I'm just very emotionally exhausted at the moment...
Don't always get what you want...😢
.
I have been patient and never given ultimatums but I think I need to make a decision sooner rather than later.
I wish you luck with your situation and hope it goes the way you want it too..
If you do decide to do it, you can try to do it in a way so that you're letting him make a decision, rather than you making a threat to leave if he doesn't act a certain way or choose a certain course. That way it's not as aggressive as an ultimatum because he has a choice and gets to decide the outcome.
Aquas are hard work and so confusing. I thought i loved mine too, but now I'm thinking i was in love with the idea of love, and the more i think about it, the more i realise there's not much to like if i am always uncertain of where i stand or if I'm not feeling important to him. It really feels like he doesn't even care except for the times we're physically with each other which isn't often because he works so much.
I'm not sure I'm ready to give up yet because i think deep down he does care and i want to try to dig it out so I'll try a little longer but in the end, you need to figure out how many of your needs are actually being met by this man and if you can live with that, or if you're better off with someone who values your happiness as much as their own.
Can you give me an example of how to do it so he is making the decision?
Options means he has 2 choices... do you want to continue to see me, and work towards a future together or would you like us to go our separate ways?
If he responds with i don't know, you will need to decide if you want to give him time to think about it and decide or if you want to tell him that if he's not sure about you, then to let you go because holding on to uncertainty and having no direction hurts too much and is unfair on you.
Uncertainty sucks. You just have to keep yourself occupied until then I guess.
Sometimes I wonder if Aquas even consider the other person... i was thinking about how many people use this site asking what to do in their relationship or why their partner is acting a certain way and how to fix things or what to say. Aquas on the other hand, don't seem to ask for relationship advice. It's like their partner is expected to adapt to them without compromise. It's mysterious and fascinating yet irritating and frustrating.
and then stuff fell thrugh.
i never tell a soul.
cause i'm too ashamed to tell the world of the pain and suffering.
so i hold all the pain and suffering inside. it's how i was.
i'm good though, no pain and suffering...but if you really want to know the truth..i dont tell peeps.
If you're upset in your relationship, do you tell your partner what is bothering you to give him an opportunity to work on it with you, or do you just withdraw into yourself and allow them to walk away without ever really knowing that deep down you cared but couldn't show it?
just do it gurrrlll if you dont, you'll never feel happy.
at least this way you will know.
click to expand
Posted by Leo188881Posted by lisabethur8Posted by Leo188881we are always confrontational and confront stuff with everything..that's why it's easily "fixed"Posted by lisabethur8Posted by Leo188881for myself i "fix" things on my own. i dont like to impose on other people. it's not my way. when i was suffering i never told anyone, i just prayed alot and cried.Posted by Gemgal101Posted by Leo188881Thank you. Guess just wait until he gets back and talk face to face. Still a couple of weeks away for that to happen but hope can just keep it together until then. Just hate being in limbo but that's partially my fault I guess...Posted by Gemgal101An ultimatum is giving one choice and a threat... if you don't make more time and effort for me, I'm going to leave you or find someone elsePosted by Leo188881Sorry to be a pain but..Posted by Gemgal101Posted by Leo188881I came to this forum to try to get a better understanding of who he is because I've never met anyone like him. It's helped me understand that what he does day to day is what is seen in other Aquarian too but I hear what your saying in that I should treat him like a regular guy and not feel like I can't say what I need to say for fear of him walking away. The last few weeks before he left were horrible for me because I did feel like we kinda broke up without breaking up. I love him very much and I can't just switch off like he can but I can't keep feeling like this. I am expecting this to not end well in the sense that he'll just want friendship and be quite aloof about it but feeling lonely in a relationship (even an unofficial one) hurts.Posted by Gemgal101What you do depends on how prepared you are to lose him. If it hurts more to feel lonely in your relationship, than it is to be alone and single, maybe it's worth making a hard decision. You can try giving him the option of either stepping up to be the man you deserve or letting you go to set you free. It might hurt and you might not get what you hoped for, but it's something to consider. I think I'm getting close to this point with my Aqua too. I feel like I hold back telling him how I'm feeling because i read too much about his stupid star sign and I've tried to accept the Aqua aloofness instead of treating him like a regular guy that's being inconsiderate or cold.
I appreciate everyone's input here. I'm so lost I still don't know what to do. I guess I have to decide what I need to do for me which might not be what I want....I'm just very emotionally exhausted at the moment...
Don't always get what you want...😢
.
I have been patient and never given ultimatums but I think I need to make a decision sooner rather than later.
I wish you luck with your situation and hope it goes the way you want it too..
If you do decide to do it, you can try to do it in a way so that you're letting him make a decision, rather than you making a threat to leave if he doesn't act a certain way or choose a certain course. That way it's not as aggressive as an ultimatum because he has a choice and gets to decide the outcome.
Aquas are hard work and so confusing. I thought i loved mine too, but now I'm thinking i was in love with the idea of love, and the more i think about it, the more i realise there's not much to like if i am always uncertain of where i stand or if I'm not feeling important to him. It really feels like he doesn't even care except for the times we're physically with each other which isn't often because he works so much.
I'm not sure I'm ready to give up yet because i think deep down he does care and i want to try to dig it out so I'll try a little longer but in the end, you need to figure out how many of your needs are actually being met by this man and if you can live with that, or if you're better off with someone who values your happiness as much as their own.
Can you give me an example of how to do it so he is making the decision?
Options means he has 2 choices... do you want to continue to see me, and work towards a future together or would you like us to go our separate ways?
If he responds with i don't know, you will need to decide if you want to give him time to think about it and decide or if you want to tell him that if he's not sure about you, then to let you go because holding on to uncertainty and having no direction hurts too much and is unfair on you.
Uncertainty sucks. You just have to keep yourself occupied until then I guess.
Sometimes I wonder if Aquas even consider the other person... i was thinking about how many people use this site asking what to do in their relationship or why their partner is acting a certain way and how to fix things or what to say. Aquas on the other hand, don't seem to ask for relationship advice. It's like their partner is expected to adapt to them without compromise. It's mysterious and fascinating yet irritating and frustrating.
and then stuff fell thrugh.
i never tell a soul.
cause i'm too ashamed to tell the world of the pain and suffering.
so i hold all the pain and suffering inside. it's how i was.
i'm good though, no pain and suffering...but if you really want to know the truth..i dont tell peeps.
If you're upset in your relationship, do you tell your partner what is bothering you to give him an opportunity to work on it with you, or do you just withdraw into yourself and allow them to walk away without ever really knowing that deep down you cared but couldn't show it?
if you let stuff fester you will never resolve stuff and it is not good and will break anyone's relationship.
you will always keep it deep inside.
you must always be open and honest and not go to anyone else. it should always be to eachother. that's why its called a relationshp. it's a relationship together not with other peeps.
but in the past i couldnt do that because it's hard to resolve drug addiction heroin addict alcoholism when the other person doens't want, or abuse because you are taught that if you talk about it and confront you're gonna get a punch in the face and a beating.
My Aqua will usually confront me about being upset at him for something he has done and fix it by apologising for making me feel that way if i tell him but he doesn't adjust the behaviour that upset me so it's never really fixed. Just covered with a bandaid.
He has never admitted to being upset by something I've done though... maybe i haven't upset him yet and need to try harder lol.
I'm sorry you had to go through that. Dealing with addicts is one of the hardest most hurtful things to endure and you can't even help them. They have to want it for themselves so it's an uncontrollable situation that is so painful to watch. I hope you got away safely and find/found someone that won't hurt you like that ever again ❤
click to expand
Posted by Leo188881😅😅Posted by Gemgal101Posted by Leo188881I'm scared of the response and reaction. I spoke to him today (he called me) and after small talk he asked if I was ok and of course my response was "yes" but inside I just wanted to blurt it all out. Just don't think I should do it whilst he's away but also means me churning my stomach inside out for another 2 weeks..🙁Posted by lisabethur8Posted by Leo188881for myself i "fix" things on my own. i dont like to impose on other people. it's not my way. when i was suffering i never told anyone, i just prayed alot and cried.Posted by Gemgal101Posted by Leo188881Thank you. Guess just wait until he gets back and talk face to face. Still a couple of weeks away for that to happen but hope can just keep it together until then. Just hate being in limbo but that's partially my fault I guess...Posted by Gemgal101An ultimatum is giving one choice and a threat... if you don't make more time and effort for me, I'm going to leave you or find someone elsePosted by Leo188881Sorry to be a pain but..Posted by Gemgal101Posted by Leo188881I came to this forum to try to get a better understanding of who he is because I've never met anyone like him. It's helped me understand that what he does day to day is what is seen in other Aquarian too but I hear what your saying in that I should treat him like a regular guy and not feel like I can't say what I need to say for fear of him walking away. The last few weeks before he left were horrible for me because I did feel like we kinda broke up without breaking up. I love him very much and I can't just switch off like he can but I can't keep feeling like this. I am expecting this to not end well in the sense that he'll just want friendship and be quite aloof about it but feeling lonely in a relationship (even an unofficial one) hurts.Posted by Gemgal101What you do depends on how prepared you are to lose him. If it hurts more to feel lonely in your relationship, than it is to be alone and single, maybe it's worth making a hard decision. You can try giving him the option of either stepping up to be the man you deserve or letting you go to set you free. It might hurt and you might not get what you hoped for, but it's something to consider. I think I'm getting close to this point with my Aqua too. I feel like I hold back telling him how I'm feeling because i read too much about his stupid star sign and I've tried to accept the Aqua aloofness instead of treating him like a regular guy that's being inconsiderate or cold.
I appreciate everyone's input here. I'm so lost I still don't know what to do. I guess I have to decide what I need to do for me which might not be what I want....I'm just very emotionally exhausted at the moment...
Don't always get what you want...😢
.
I have been patient and never given ultimatums but I think I need to make a decision sooner rather than later.
I wish you luck with your situation and hope it goes the way you want it too..
If you do decide to do it, you can try to do it in a way so that you're letting him make a decision, rather than you making a threat to leave if he doesn't act a certain way or choose a certain course. That way it's not as aggressive as an ultimatum because he has a choice and gets to decide the outcome.
Aquas are hard work and so confusing. I thought i loved mine too, but now I'm thinking i was in love with the idea of love, and the more i think about it, the more i realise there's not much to like if i am always uncertain of where i stand or if I'm not feeling important to him. It really feels like he doesn't even care except for the times we're physically with each other which isn't often because he works so much.
I'm not sure I'm ready to give up yet because i think deep down he does care and i want to try to dig it out so I'll try a little longer but in the end, you need to figure out how many of your needs are actually being met by this man and if you can live with that, or if you're better off with someone who values your happiness as much as their own.
Can you give me an example of how to do it so he is making the decision?
Options means he has 2 choices... do you want to continue to see me, and work towards a future together or would you like us to go our separate ways?
If he responds with i don't know, you will need to decide if you want to give him time to think about it and decide or if you want to tell him that if he's not sure about you, then to let you go because holding on to uncertainty and having no direction hurts too much and is unfair on you.
Uncertainty sucks. You just have to keep yourself occupied until then I guess.
Sometimes I wonder if Aquas even consider the other person... i was thinking about how many people use this site asking what to do in their relationship or why their partner is acting a certain way and how to fix things or what to say. Aquas on the other hand, don't seem to ask for relationship advice. It's like their partner is expected to adapt to them without compromise. It's mysterious and fascinating yet irritating and frustrating.
and then stuff fell thrugh.
i never tell a soul.
cause i'm too ashamed to tell the world of the pain and suffering.
so i hold all the pain and suffering inside. it's how i was.
i'm good though, no pain and suffering...but if you really want to know the truth..i dont tell peeps.
If you're upset in your relationship, do you tell your partner what is bothering you to give him an opportunity to work on it with you, or do you just withdraw into yourself and allow them to walk away without ever really knowing that deep down you cared but couldn't show it?
Just keep venting on here for 2 weeks to kill the time in between. We'll be your Aquas Anonymous support group and get you through
click to expand
Posted by Leo188881I've had my share of long relationships and have been married and divorced so guess I'm at a stage where I just want things to be open and honest cos I'm too old for anything else. But this relationship is nothing like I've ever had and it's exciting and frustrating at the same time. Sometimes I think they make it challenging just to see if you care about them enough to stay. I know my aqua has a big heart but he has the toughest exterior ever!Posted by Gemgal101Yeah I've been seeing an Aqua for 3 months. And it's challenging AF!!!Posted by Leo188881😅😅Posted by Gemgal101Posted by Leo188881I'm scared of the response and reaction. I spoke to him today (he called me) and after small talk he asked if I was ok and of course my response was "yes" but inside I just wanted to blurt it all out. Just don't think I should do it whilst he's away but also means me churning my stomach inside out for another 2 weeks..🙁Posted by lisabethur8Posted by Leo188881for myself i "fix" things on my own. i dont like to impose on other people. it's not my way. when i was suffering i never told anyone, i just prayed alot and cried.Posted by Gemgal101Posted by Leo188881Thank you. Guess just wait until he gets back and talk face to face. Still a couple of weeks away for that to happen but hope can just keep it together until then. Just hate being in limbo but that's partially my fault I guess...Posted by Gemgal101An ultimatum is giving one choice and a threat... if you don't make more time and effort for me, I'm going to leave you or find someone elsePosted by Leo188881Sorry to be a pain but..Posted by Gemgal101Posted by Leo188881I came to this forum to try to get a better understanding of who he is because I've never met anyone like him. It's helped me understand that what he does day to day is what is seen in other Aquarian too but I hear what your saying in that I should treat him like a regular guy and not feel like I can't say what I need to say for fear of him walking away. The last few weeks before he left were horrible for me because I did feel like we kinda broke up without breaking up. I love him very much and I can't just switch off like he can but I can't keep feeling like this. I am expecting this to not end well in the sense that he'll just want friendship and be quite aloof about it but feeling lonely in a relationship (even an unofficial one) hurts.Posted by Gemgal101What you do depends on how prepared you are to lose him. If it hurts more to feel lonely in your relationship, than it is to be alone and single, maybe it's worth making a hard decision. You can try giving him the option of either stepping up to be the man you deserve or letting you go to set you free. It might hurt and you might not get what you hoped for, but it's something to consider. I think I'm getting close to this point with my Aqua too. I feel like I hold back telling him how I'm feeling because i read too much about his stupid star sign and I've tried to accept the Aqua aloofness instead of treating him like a regular guy that's being inconsiderate or cold.
I appreciate everyone's input here. I'm so lost I still don't know what to do. I guess I have to decide what I need to do for me which might not be what I want....I'm just very emotionally exhausted at the moment...
Don't always get what you want...😢
.
I have been patient and never given ultimatums but I think I need to make a decision sooner rather than later.
I wish you luck with your situation and hope it goes the way you want it too..
If you do decide to do it, you can try to do it in a way so that you're letting him make a decision, rather than you making a threat to leave if he doesn't act a certain way or choose a certain course. That way it's not as aggressive as an ultimatum because he has a choice and gets to decide the outcome.
Aquas are hard work and so confusing. I thought i loved mine too, but now I'm thinking i was in love with the idea of love, and the more i think about it, the more i realise there's not much to like if i am always uncertain of where i stand or if I'm not feeling important to him. It really feels like he doesn't even care except for the times we're physically with each other which isn't often because he works so much.
I'm not sure I'm ready to give up yet because i think deep down he does care and i want to try to dig it out so I'll try a little longer but in the end, you need to figure out how many of your needs are actually being met by this man and if you can live with that, or if you're better off with someone who values your happiness as much as their own.
Can you give me an example of how to do it so he is making the decision?
Options means he has 2 choices... do you want to continue to see me, and work towards a future together or would you like us to go our separate ways?
If he responds with i don't know, you will need to decide if you want to give him time to think about it and decide or if you want to tell him that if he's not sure about you, then to let you go because holding on to uncertainty and having no direction hurts too much and is unfair on you.
Uncertainty sucks. You just have to keep yourself occupied until then I guess.
Sometimes I wonder if Aquas even consider the other person... i was thinking about how many people use this site asking what to do in their relationship or why their partner is acting a certain way and how to fix things or what to say. Aquas on the other hand, don't seem to ask for relationship advice. It's like their partner is expected to adapt to them without compromise. It's mysterious and fascinating yet irritating and frustrating.
and then stuff fell thrugh.
i never tell a soul.
cause i'm too ashamed to tell the world of the pain and suffering.
so i hold all the pain and suffering inside. it's how i was.
i'm good though, no pain and suffering...but if you really want to know the truth..i dont tell peeps.
If you're upset in your relationship, do you tell your partner what is bothering you to give him an opportunity to work on it with you, or do you just withdraw into yourself and allow them to walk away without ever really knowing that deep down you cared but couldn't show it?
Just keep venting on here for 2 weeks to kill the time in between. We'll be your Aquas Anonymous support group and get you through
Thank you. Made me smile which is a nice change but you all might get sick of me after 2 weeks. I'll still take you up on the offer!!
BTW are you with an aqua or just had experience with them?
I don't know how to do relationships. I usually get insecure that they don't care about me (libra saturn problems) so I'm trying really hard to stick it out and try to make it work but he makes it pretty fucking difficult.click to expand
Posted by Gemgal101Big MISTAKE! Lmao
I came to this forum a couple of months ago...
Posted by GemitatiOk. Can you elaborate? I'm all eyes and ready for truth.Posted by Gemgal101Big MISTAKE! Lmao
I came to this forum a couple of months ago...click to expand
Posted by Gemgal101It’s not elaboratable...sorry sis...😍Posted by GemitatiOk. Can you elaborate? I'm all eyes and ready for truth.Posted by Gemgal101Big MISTAKE! Lmao
I came to this forum a couple of months ago...click to expand
Posted by GemitatiIt must be to some extent otherwise why—Posted by Gemgal101It’s not elaboratable...sorry sis...😍Posted by GemitatiOk. Can you elaborate? I'm all eyes and ready for truth.Posted by Gemgal101Big MISTAKE! Lmao
I came to this forum a couple of months ago...click to expand
Posted by Gemgal101I need help from audience...Posted by GemitatiIt must be to some extent otherwise why—Posted by Gemgal101It’s not elaboratable...sorry sis...😍Posted by GemitatiOk. Can you elaborate? I'm all eyes and ready for truth.Posted by Gemgal101Big MISTAKE! Lmao
I came to this forum a couple of months ago...click to expand
Posted by Leo188881Not rambling and I'm not much older than you.Posted by Gemgal101Posted by Leo188881I've had my share of long relationships and have been married and divorced so guess I'm at a stage where I just want things to be open and honest cos I'm too old for anything else. But this relationship is nothing like I've ever had and it's exciting and frustrating at the same time. Sometimes I think they make it challenging just to see if you care about them enough to stay. I know my aqua has a big heart but he has the toughest exterior ever!Posted by Gemgal101Yeah I've been seeing an Aqua for 3 months. And it's challenging AF!!!Posted by Leo188881😅😅Posted by Gemgal101Posted by Leo188881I'm scared of the response and reaction. I spoke to him today (he called me) and after small talk he asked if I was ok and of course my response was "yes" but inside I just wanted to blurt it all out. Just don't think I should do it whilst he's away but also means me churning my stomach inside out for another 2 weeks..🙁Posted by lisabethur8Posted by Leo188881for myself i "fix" things on my own. i dont like to impose on other people. it's not my way. when i was suffering i never told anyone, i just prayed alot and cried.Posted by Gemgal101Posted by Leo188881Thank you. Guess just wait until he gets back and talk face to face. Still a couple of weeks away for that to happen but hope can just keep it together until then. Just hate being in limbo but that's partially my fault I guess...Posted by Gemgal101An ultimatum is giving one choice and a threat... if you don't make more time and effort for me, I'm going to leave you or find someone elsePosted by Leo188881Sorry to be a pain but..Posted by Gemgal101Posted by Leo188881I came to this forum to try to get a better understanding of who he is because I've never met anyone like him. It's helped me understand that what he does day to day is what is seen in other Aquarian too but I hear what your saying in that I should treat him like a regular guy and not feel like I can't say what I need to say for fear of him walking away. The last few weeks before he left were horrible for me because I did feel like we kinda broke up without breaking up. I love him very much and I can't just switch off like he can but I can't keep feeling like this. I am expecting this to not end well in the sense that he'll just want friendship and be quite aloof about it but feeling lonely in a relationship (even an unofficial one) hurts.Posted by Gemgal101What you do depends on how prepared you are to lose him. If it hurts more to feel lonely in your relationship, than it is to be alone and single, maybe it's worth making a hard decision. You can try giving him the option of either stepping up to be the man you deserve or letting you go to set you free. It might hurt and you might not get what you hoped for, but it's something to consider. I think I'm getting close to this point with my Aqua too. I feel like I hold back telling him how I'm feeling because i read too much about his stupid star sign and I've tried to accept the Aqua aloofness instead of treating him like a regular guy that's being inconsiderate or cold.
I appreciate everyone's input here. I'm so lost I still don't know what to do. I guess I have to decide what I need to do for me which might not be what I want....I'm just very emotionally exhausted at the moment...
Don't always get what you want...😢
.
I have been patient and never given ultimatums but I think I need to make a decision sooner rather than later.
I wish you luck with your situation and hope it goes the way you want it too..
If you do decide to do it, you can try to do it in a way so that you're letting him make a decision, rather than you making a threat to leave if he doesn't act a certain way or choose a certain course. That way it's not as aggressive as an ultimatum because he has a choice and gets to decide the outcome.
Aquas are hard work and so confusing. I thought i loved mine too, but now I'm thinking i was in love with the idea of love, and the more i think about it, the more i realise there's not much to like if i am always uncertain of where i stand or if I'm not feeling important to him. It really feels like he doesn't even care except for the times we're physically with each other which isn't often because he works so much.
I'm not sure I'm ready to give up yet because i think deep down he does care and i want to try to dig it out so I'll try a little longer but in the end, you need to figure out how many of your needs are actually being met by this man and if you can live with that, or if you're better off with someone who values your happiness as much as their own.
Can you give me an example of how to do it so he is making the decision?
Options means he has 2 choices... do you want to continue to see me, and work towards a future together or would you like us to go our separate ways?
If he responds with i don't know, you will need to decide if you want to give him time to think about it and decide or if you want to tell him that if he's not sure about you, then to let you go because holding on to uncertainty and having no direction hurts too much and is unfair on you.
Uncertainty sucks. You just have to keep yourself occupied until then I guess.
Sometimes I wonder if Aquas even consider the other person... i was thinking about how many people use this site asking what to do in their relationship or why their partner is acting a certain way and how to fix things or what to say. Aquas on the other hand, don't seem to ask for relationship advice. It's like their partner is expected to adapt to them without compromise. It's mysterious and fascinating yet irritating and frustrating.
and then stuff fell thrugh.
i never tell a soul.
cause i'm too ashamed to tell the world of the pain and suffering.
so i hold all the pain and suffering inside. it's how i was.
i'm good though, no pain and suffering...but if you really want to know the truth..i dont tell peeps.
If you're upset in your relationship, do you tell your partner what is bothering you to give him an opportunity to work on it with you, or do you just withdraw into yourself and allow them to walk away without ever really knowing that deep down you cared but couldn't show it?
Just keep venting on here for 2 weeks to kill the time in between. We'll be your Aquas Anonymous support group and get you through
Thank you. Made me smile which is a nice change but you all might get sick of me after 2 weeks. I'll still take you up on the offer!!
BTW are you with an aqua or just had experience with them?
I don't know how to do relationships. I usually get insecure that they don't care about me (libra saturn problems) so I'm trying really hard to stick it out and try to make it work but he makes it pretty fucking difficult.
As long as you are happy and he's worth it 😊
I'm too old for it too! I'm 36 and want a family so i feel like I'm running out of time and i don't want to waste it for nothing. I made it clear early on, not to waste my time if it's not going anywhere and my friend, who is married to his friend gave him a big lecture about not hurting me or wasting my time if he's not serious because the last couple years were hard on me. His ex left him for someone else so i think he's broken and doesn't know what to trust. I feel like he's testing my limits and making me suffer by making no effort because of his last relationship, and that stings because i don't deserve it. I don't know what the future holds but i hope this is worth it. I feel like I'm rambling...
click to expand
Posted by Leo188881Too true!Posted by Gemgal101Posted by Leo188881Not rambling and I'm not much older than you.Posted by Gemgal101Posted by Leo188881I've had my share of long relationships and have been married and divorced so guess I'm at a stage where I just want things to be open and honest cos I'm too old for anything else. But this relationship is nothing like I've ever had and it's exciting and frustrating at the same time. Sometimes I think they make it challenging just to see if you care about them enough to stay. I know my aqua has a big heart but he has the toughest exterior ever!Posted by Gemgal101Yeah I've been seeing an Aqua for 3 months. And it's challenging AF!!!Posted by Leo188881😅😅Posted by Gemgal101Posted by Leo188881I'm scared of the response and reaction. I spoke to him today (he called me) and after small talk he asked if I was ok and of course my response was "yes" but inside I just wanted to blurt it all out. Just don't think I should do it whilst he's away but also means me churning my stomach inside out for another 2 weeks..🙁Posted by lisabethur8Posted by Leo188881for myself i "fix" things on my own. i dont like to impose on other people. it's not my way. when i was suffering i never told anyone, i just prayed alot and cried.Posted by Gemgal101Posted by Leo188881Thank you. Guess just wait until he gets back and talk face to face. Still a couple of weeks away for that to happen but hope can just keep it together until then. Just hate being in limbo but that's partially my fault I guess...Posted by Gemgal101An ultimatum is giving one choice and a threat... if you don't make more time and effort for me, I'm going to leave you or find someone elsePosted by Leo188881Sorry to be a pain but..Posted by Gemgal101Posted by Leo188881I came to this forum to try to get a better understanding of who he is because I've never met anyone like him. It's helped me understand that what he does day to day is what is seen in other Aquarian too but I hear what your saying in that I should treat him like a regular guy and not feel like I can't say what I need to say for fear of him walking away. The last few weeks before he left were horrible for me because I did feel like we kinda broke up without breaking up. I love him very much and I can't just switch off like he can but I can't keep feeling like this. I am expecting this to not end well in the sense that he'll just want friendship and be quite aloof about it but feeling lonely in a relationship (even an unofficial one) hurts.Posted by Gemgal101What you do depends on how prepared you are to lose him. If it hurts more to feel lonely in your relationship, than it is to be alone and single, maybe it's worth making a hard decision. You can try giving him the option of either stepping up to be the man you deserve or letting you go to set you free. It might hurt and you might not get what you hoped for, but it's something to consider. I think I'm getting close to this point with my Aqua too. I feel like I hold back telling him how I'm feeling because i read too much about his stupid star sign and I've tried to accept the Aqua aloofness instead of treating him like a regular guy that's being inconsiderate or cold.
I appreciate everyone's input here. I'm so lost I still don't know what to do. I guess I have to decide what I need to do for me which might not be what I want....I'm just very emotionally exhausted at the moment...
Don't always get what you want...😢
.
I have been patient and never given ultimatums but I think I need to make a decision sooner rather than later.
I wish you luck with your situation and hope it goes the way you want it too..
If you do decide to do it, you can try to do it in a way so that you're letting him make a decision, rather than you making a threat to leave if he doesn't act a certain way or choose a certain course. That way it's not as aggressive as an ultimatum because he has a choice and gets to decide the outcome.
Aquas are hard work and so confusing. I thought i loved mine too, but now I'm thinking i was in love with the idea of love, and the more i think about it, the more i realise there's not much to like if i am always uncertain of where i stand or if I'm not feeling important to him. It really feels like he doesn't even care except for the times we're physically with each other which isn't often because he works so much.
I'm not sure I'm ready to give up yet because i think deep down he does care and i want to try to dig it out so I'll try a little longer but in the end, you need to figure out how many of your needs are actually being met by this man and if you can live with that, or if you're better off with someone who values your happiness as much as their own.
Can you give me an example of how to do it so he is making the decision?
Options means he has 2 choices... do you want to continue to see me, and work towards a future together or would you like us to go our separate ways?
If he responds with i don't know, you will need to decide if you want to give him time to think about it and decide or if you want to tell him that if he's not sure about you, then to let you go because holding on to uncertainty and having no direction hurts too much and is unfair on you.
Uncertainty sucks. You just have to keep yourself occupied until then I guess.
Sometimes I wonder if Aquas even consider the other person... i was thinking about how many people use this site asking what to do in their relationship or why their partner is acting a certain way and how to fix things or what to say. Aquas on the other hand, don't seem to ask for relationship advice. It's like their partner is expected to adapt to them without compromise. It's mysterious and fascinating yet irritating and frustrating.
and then stuff fell thrugh.
i never tell a soul.
cause i'm too ashamed to tell the world of the pain and suffering.
so i hold all the pain and suffering inside. it's how i was.
i'm good though, no pain and suffering...but if you really want to know the truth..i dont tell peeps.
If you're upset in your relationship, do you tell your partner what is bothering you to give him an opportunity to work on it with you, or do you just withdraw into yourself and allow them to walk away without ever really knowing that deep down you cared but couldn't show it?
Just keep venting on here for 2 weeks to kill the time in between. We'll be your Aquas Anonymous support group and get you through
Thank you. Made me smile which is a nice change but you all might get sick of me after 2 weeks. I'll still take you up on the offer!!
BTW are you with an aqua or just had experience with them?
I don't know how to do relationships. I usually get insecure that they don't care about me (libra saturn problems) so I'm trying really hard to stick it out and try to make it work but he makes it pretty fucking difficult.
As long as you are happy and he's worth it 😊
I'm too old for it too! I'm 36 and want a family so i feel like I'm running out of time and i don't want to waste it for nothing. I made it clear early on, not to waste my time if it's not going anywhere and my friend, who is married to his friend gave him a big lecture about not hurting me or wasting my time if he's not serious because the last couple years were hard on me. His ex left him for someone else so i think he's broken and doesn't know what to trust. I feel like he's testing my limits and making me suffer by making no effort because of his last relationship, and that stings because i don't deserve it. I don't know what the future holds but i hope this is worth it. I feel like I'm rambling...
Does sound like he is so cautious of letting you in for fear of being burnt again but he has to work that out for himself and understand that not everyone is going to hurt him by leaving him. Only time will tell I guess..I feel for you though..
Thank you. I hope things work out for both of us. Hopefully these Aqua guys surprise us and stop being so damn confusing!
click to expand
Posted by Gemgal101I am with you girls, reading..same stuff for me as well...after 2 years on and off with an aqua's difficult ass..Posted by Leo188881I've had my share of long relationships and have been married and divorced so guess I'm at a stage where I just want things to be open and honest cos I'm too old for anything else. But this relationship is nothing like I've ever had and it's exciting and frustrating at the same time. Sometimes I think they make it challenging just to see if you care about them enough to stay. I know my aqua has a big heart but he has the toughest exterior ever!Posted by Gemgal101Yeah I've been seeing an Aqua for 3 months. And it's challenging AF!!!Posted by Leo188881😅😅Posted by Gemgal101Posted by Leo188881I'm scared of the response and reaction. I spoke to him today (he called me) and after small talk he asked if I was ok and of course my response was "yes" but inside I just wanted to blurt it all out. Just don't think I should do it whilst he's away but also means me churning my stomach inside out for another 2 weeks..🙁Posted by lisabethur8Posted by Leo188881for myself i "fix" things on my own. i dont like to impose on other people. it's not my way. when i was suffering i never told anyone, i just prayed alot and cried.Posted by Gemgal101Posted by Leo188881Thank you. Guess just wait until he gets back and talk face to face. Still a couple of weeks away for that to happen but hope can just keep it together until then. Just hate being in limbo but that's partially my fault I guess...Posted by Gemgal101An ultimatum is giving one choice and a threat... if you don't make more time and effort for me, I'm going to leave you or find someone elsePosted by Leo188881Sorry to be a pain but..Posted by Gemgal101Posted by Leo188881I came to this forum to try to get a better understanding of who he is because I've never met anyone like him. It's helped me understand that what he does day to day is what is seen in other Aquarian too but I hear what your saying in that I should treat him like a regular guy and not feel like I can't say what I need to say for fear of him walking away. The last few weeks before he left were horrible for me because I did feel like we kinda broke up without breaking up. I love him very much and I can't just switch off like he can but I can't keep feeling like this. I am expecting this to not end well in the sense that he'll just want friendship and be quite aloof about it but feeling lonely in a relationship (even an unofficial one) hurts.Posted by Gemgal101What you do depends on how prepared you are to lose him. If it hurts more to feel lonely in your relationship, than it is to be alone and single, maybe it's worth making a hard decision. You can try giving him the option of either stepping up to be the man you deserve or letting you go to set you free. It might hurt and you might not get what you hoped for, but it's something to consider. I think I'm getting close to this point with my Aqua too. I feel like I hold back telling him how I'm feeling because i read too much about his stupid star sign and I've tried to accept the Aqua aloofness instead of treating him like a regular guy that's being inconsiderate or cold.
I appreciate everyone's input here. I'm so lost I still don't know what to do. I guess I have to decide what I need to do for me which might not be what I want....I'm just very emotionally exhausted at the moment...
Don't always get what you want...😢
.
I have been patient and never given ultimatums but I think I need to make a decision sooner rather than later.
I wish you luck with your situation and hope it goes the way you want it too..
If you do decide to do it, you can try to do it in a way so that you're letting him make a decision, rather than you making a threat to leave if he doesn't act a certain way or choose a certain course. That way it's not as aggressive as an ultimatum because he has a choice and gets to decide the outcome.
Aquas are hard work and so confusing. I thought i loved mine too, but now I'm thinking i was in love with the idea of love, and the more i think about it, the more i realise there's not much to like if i am always uncertain of where i stand or if I'm not feeling important to him. It really feels like he doesn't even care except for the times we're physically with each other which isn't often because he works so much.
I'm not sure I'm ready to give up yet because i think deep down he does care and i want to try to dig it out so I'll try a little longer but in the end, you need to figure out how many of your needs are actually being met by this man and if you can live with that, or if you're better off with someone who values your happiness as much as their own.
Can you give me an example of how to do it so he is making the decision?
Options means he has 2 choices... do you want to continue to see me, and work towards a future together or would you like us to go our separate ways?
If he responds with i don't know, you will need to decide if you want to give him time to think about it and decide or if you want to tell him that if he's not sure about you, then to let you go because holding on to uncertainty and having no direction hurts too much and is unfair on you.
Uncertainty sucks. You just have to keep yourself occupied until then I guess.
Sometimes I wonder if Aquas even consider the other person... i was thinking about how many people use this site asking what to do in their relationship or why their partner is acting a certain way and how to fix things or what to say. Aquas on the other hand, don't seem to ask for relationship advice. It's like their partner is expected to adapt to them without compromise. It's mysterious and fascinating yet irritating and frustrating.
and then stuff fell thrugh.
i never tell a soul.
cause i'm too ashamed to tell the world of the pain and suffering.
so i hold all the pain and suffering inside. it's how i was.
i'm good though, no pain and suffering...but if you really want to know the truth..i dont tell peeps.
If you're upset in your relationship, do you tell your partner what is bothering you to give him an opportunity to work on it with you, or do you just withdraw into yourself and allow them to walk away without ever really knowing that deep down you cared but couldn't show it?
Just keep venting on here for 2 weeks to kill the time in between. We'll be your Aquas Anonymous support group and get you through
Thank you. Made me smile which is a nice change but you all might get sick of me after 2 weeks. I'll still take you up on the offer!!
BTW are you with an aqua or just had experience with them?
I don't know how to do relationships. I usually get insecure that they don't care about me (libra saturn problems) so I'm trying really hard to stick it out and try to make it work but he makes it pretty fucking difficult.
As long as you are happy and he's worth it 😊
click to expand
Posted by SeleukosPosted by Leo188881Like your honesty and don't be sorry:-)Posted by Gemgal101Yes to the first hope, no for the second. 😛Posted by Leo188881Posted by Gemgal101Posted by Leo188881I've had my share of long relationships and have been married and divorced so guess I'm at a stage where I just want things to be open and honest cos I'm too old for anything else. But this relationship is nothing like I've ever had and it's exciting and frustrating at the same time. Sometimes I think they make it challenging just to see if you care about them enough to stay. I know my aqua has a big heart but he has the toughest exterior ever!Posted by Gemgal101Yeah I've been seeing an Aqua for 3 months. And it's challenging AF!!!Posted by Leo188881😅😅Posted by Gemgal101Posted by Leo188881I'm scared of the response and reaction. I spoke to him today (he called me) and after small talk he asked if I was ok and of course my response was "yes" but inside I just wanted to blurt it all out. Just don't think I should do it whilst he's away but also means me churning my stomach inside out for another 2 weeks..🙁Posted by lisabethur8Posted by Leo188881for myself i "fix" things on my own. i dont like to impose on other people. it's not my way. when i was suffering i never told anyone, i just prayed alot and cried.Posted by Gemgal101Posted by Leo188881Thank you. Guess just wait until he gets back and talk face to face. Still a couple of weeks away for that to happen but hope can just keep it together until then. Just hate being in limbo but that's partially my fault I guess...Posted by Gemgal101An ultimatum is giving one choice and a threat... if you don't make more time and effort for me, I'm going to leave you or find someone elsePosted by Leo188881Sorry to be a pain but..Posted by Gemgal101Posted by Leo188881I came to this forum to try to get a better understanding of who he is because I've never met anyone like him. It's helped me understand that what he does day to day is what is seen in other Aquarian too but I hear what your saying in that I should treat him like a regular guy and not feel like I can't say what I need to say for fear of him walking away. The last few weeks before he left were horrible for me because I did feel like we kinda broke up without breaking up. I love him very much and I can't just switch off like he can but I can't keep feeling like this. I am expecting this to not end well in the sense that he'll just want friendship and be quite aloof about it but feeling lonely in a relationship (even an unofficial one) hurts.Posted by Gemgal101What you do depends on how prepared you are to lose him. If it hurts more to feel lonely in your relationship, than it is to be alone and single, maybe it's worth making a hard decision. You can try giving him the option of either stepping up to be the man you deserve or letting you go to set you free. It might hurt and you might not get what you hoped for, but it's something to consider. I think I'm getting close to this point with my Aqua too. I feel like I hold back telling him how I'm feeling because i read too much about his stupid star sign and I've tried to accept the Aqua aloofness instead of treating him like a regular guy that's being inconsiderate or cold.
I appreciate everyone's input here. I'm so lost I still don't know what to do. I guess I have to decide what I need to do for me which might not be what I want....I'm just very emotionally exhausted at the moment...
Don't always get what you want...😢
.
I have been patient and never given ultimatums but I think I need to make a decision sooner rather than later.
I wish you luck with your situation and hope it goes the way you want it too..
If you do decide to do it, you can try to do it in a way so that you're letting him make a decision, rather than you making a threat to leave if he doesn't act a certain way or choose a certain course. That way it's not as aggressive as an ultimatum because he has a choice and gets to decide the outcome.
Aquas are hard work and so confusing. I thought i loved mine too, but now I'm thinking i was in love with the idea of love, and the more i think about it, the more i realise there's not much to like if i am always uncertain of where i stand or if I'm not feeling important to him. It really feels like he doesn't even care except for the times we're physically with each other which isn't often because he works so much.
I'm not sure I'm ready to give up yet because i think deep down he does care and i want to try to dig it out so I'll try a little longer but in the end, you need to figure out how many of your needs are actually being met by this man and if you can live with that, or if you're better off with someone who values your happiness as much as their own.
Can you give me an example of how to do it so he is making the decision?
Options means he has 2 choices... do you want to continue to see me, and work towards a future together or would you like us to go our separate ways?
If he responds with i don't know, you will need to decide if you want to give him time to think about it and decide or if you want to tell him that if he's not sure about you, then to let you go because holding on to uncertainty and having no direction hurts too much and is unfair on you.
Uncertainty sucks. You just have to keep yourself occupied until then I guess.
Sometimes I wonder if Aquas even consider the other person... i was thinking about how many people use this site asking what to do in their relationship or why their partner is acting a certain way and how to fix things or what to say. Aquas on the other hand, don't seem to ask for relationship advice. It's like their partner is expected to adapt to them without compromise. It's mysterious and fascinating yet irritating and frustrating.
and then stuff fell thrugh.
i never tell a soul.
cause i'm too ashamed to tell the world of the pain and suffering.
so i hold all the pain and suffering inside. it's how i was.
i'm good though, no pain and suffering...but if you really want to know the truth..i dont tell peeps.
If you're upset in your relationship, do you tell your partner what is bothering you to give him an opportunity to work on it with you, or do you just withdraw into yourself and allow them to walk away without ever really knowing that deep down you cared but couldn't show it?
Just keep venting on here for 2 weeks to kill the time in between. We'll be your Aquas Anonymous support group and get you through
Thank you. Made me smile which is a nice change but you all might get sick of me after 2 weeks. I'll still take you up on the offer!!
BTW are you with an aqua or just had experience with them?
I don't know how to do relationships. I usually get insecure that they don't care about me (libra saturn problems) so I'm trying really hard to stick it out and try to make it work but he makes it pretty fucking difficult.
As long as you are happy and he's worth it 😊
I'm too old for it too! I'm 36 and want a family so i feel like I'm running out of time and i don't want to waste it for nothing. I made it clear early on, not to waste my time if it's not going anywhere and my friend, who is married to his friend gave him a big lecture about not hurting me or wasting my time if he's not serious because the last couple years were hard on me. His ex left him for someone else so i think he's broken and doesn't know what to trust. I feel like he's testing my limits and making me suffer by making no effort because of his last relationship, and that stings because i don't deserve it. I don't know what the future holds but i hope this is worth it. I feel like I'm rambling...
We are what we are, sorry.click to expand
Posted by SeleukosI hate when it blocks out something I want to read! lol
I didn't mean to say you were trying to change or cage him in any kind or form.
We are just constantly evolving in some ways.
What you say make sense and is absolutely understandable as well as reasonable.
I'm just a bit unsure if an Aquarius, a hurt one can deliver that consistently enough for the first years so you can feel secure and loved the way want to.
Posted by SeleukosMe as a scorpio...i have same feeling..Good point again Mr!Posted by Leo188881While reading the following please keep in mind that I'm a special hardcore case:Posted by SeleukosPosted by saggurl88Sorry, didn't know how to prevent it from doing this. 😢Posted by SeleukosI hate when it blocks out something I want to read! lol
I didn't mean to say you were trying to change or cage him in any kind or form.
We are just constantly evolving in some ways.
What you say make sense and is absolutely understandable as well as reasonable.
I'm just a bit unsure if an Aquarius, a hurt one can deliver that consistently enough for the first years so you can feel secure and loved the way want to.
Yeah it went all weird so i tried to delete everything and start a new thread but i wasn't quick enough.
As for Aquaman, I'm going to try a little bit longer.
Can you expand a little on what you mean by constantly evolving... in what ways?
There is nothing in the world than having the feeling of being loved completly.
Every time I get closer or intimate etc. withe the person that would love me requires me to adapt because I don't want to be absorbed by her or feel hepless.
I have to keep moving constantly in order to not break down completly.click to expand
Posted by SeleukosWhat do you mean by moving constantly In order not to break down?Posted by Leo188881While reading the following please keep in mind that I'm a special hardcore case:Posted by SeleukosPosted by saggurl88Sorry, didn't know how to prevent it from doing this. 😢Posted by SeleukosI hate when it blocks out something I want to read! lol
I didn't mean to say you were trying to change or cage him in any kind or form.
We are just constantly evolving in some ways.
What you say make sense and is absolutely understandable as well as reasonable.
I'm just a bit unsure if an Aquarius, a hurt one can deliver that consistently enough for the first years so you can feel secure and loved the way want to.
Yeah it went all weird so i tried to delete everything and start a new thread but i wasn't quick enough.
As for Aquaman, I'm going to try a little bit longer.
Can you expand a little on what you mean by constantly evolving... in what ways?
There is nothing in the world than having the feeling of being loved completly.
Every time I get closer or intimate etc. withe the person that would love me requires me to adapt because I don't want to be absorbed by her or feel hepless.
I have to keep moving constantly in order to not break down completly.click to expand
Posted by Seleukos..just what i was saying 🙂 New day, new challenge...brain storm in the gym...ahhhh
Sorry guys,
I need to put you off till tomorrow.
I need some sleep now but I'll think of it while being in the gym tomorrow morning.
Posted by Leo188881Ok I guess. Just trying to distract myself from thinking about it too much but can't stop the mind going a million miles a hour. I want to be able to say to myself "whatever will be will be" but I can't.
@gemgal101 how are you feeling today?
Posted by Leo188881Ok I guess. Just trying to distract myself from thinking about it too much but can't stop the mind going a million miles a hour. I want to be able to say to myself "whatever will be will be" but I can't.
@gemgal101 how are you feeling today?
Posted by pinkbird03I do think about him always but just more wondering what he's thinking and because it's sort of a limbo relationship I guess I think about what will be in the future instead of just taking it a day at a time...anxious is my middle name😄
Do you obsess over him a lot? Because I do.....
Posted by Leo188881Spoke yesterday. He called but just small talk.Posted by pinkbird03Have you heard from your guy yet or are you both still ghosting?
Do you obsess over him a lot? Because I do.....click to expand
Posted by Leo188881Nope. It’s been two weeks today I believe. Hes still trying to get my attention and he looks at my Snapchat stories. I’ve only posted 2 though because I’m keeping my distance but still living my life ya know what I mean. He looked at one of them within 4 minutes. It made me happy. Yes, breadcrumbs make me happy..... kinda sad. Wish he’d text me.. at this point I think he’s being stubborn. I think we both don’t want to be the first one to text the other.Posted by pinkbird03Have you heard from your guy yet or are you both still ghosting?
Do you obsess over him a lot? Because I do.....click to expand
Posted by Gemgal101Posted by pinkbird03I do think about him always but just more wondering what he's thinking and because it's sort of a limbo relationship I guess I think about what will be in the future instead of just taking it a day at a time...anxious is my middle name😄
Do you obsess over him a lot? Because I do.....click to expand
Posted by pinkbird03I will. As for you, sounds like who will give in first and text but love your attitude for standing your ground.Posted by Gemgal101Posted by pinkbird03I do think about him always but just more wondering what he's thinking and because it's sort of a limbo relationship I guess I think about what will be in the future instead of just taking it a day at a time...anxious is my middle name😄
Do you obsess over him a lot? Because I do.....
lol aww. Try to be positive. I think he will come around!
click to expand
Posted by Leo188881He asked at the end of the convo if I was all Good and of course I lied and said "yes" and asked him if he was and he said yes. He did send me a text later with some photo's of his travels as well.Posted by Gemgal101All good. I wanted to know. Has he said anything or picked up on you being upset or is he just acting like nothing is different
Sorry Leo18881. Quoted in post you meant for pinkbird03. 🙃click to expand
Posted by Leo188881Posted by pinkbird03Posted by Leo188881Nope. It’s been two weeks today I believe. Hes still trying to get my attention and he looks at my Snapchat stories. I’ve only posted 2 though because I’m keeping my distance but still living my life ya know what I mean. He looked at one of them within 4 minutes. It made me happy. Yes, breadcrumbs make me happy..... kinda sad. Wish he’d text me.. at this point I think he’s being stubborn. I think we both don’t want to be the first one to text the other.Posted by pinkbird03Have you heard from your guy yet or are you both still ghosting?
Do you obsess over him a lot? Because I do.....
How long are you going to keep it up before you decide it's finished?
click to expand
Posted by Gemgal101Posted by pinkbird03I will. As for you, sounds like who will give in first and text but love your attitude for standing your ground.Posted by Gemgal101Posted by pinkbird03I do think about him always but just more wondering what he's thinking and because it's sort of a limbo relationship I guess I think about what will be in the future instead of just taking it a day at a time...anxious is my middle name😄
Do you obsess over him a lot? Because I do.....
lol aww. Try to be positive. I think he will come around!
click to expand
Posted by Leo188881He's been away before and contacted me in some way every day and told me he missed me on those occasions. This is different but this is a trip he's wanted to do for ages and he seemed rather withdrawn before he left like everything was becoming too much so I kinda thought I wouldn't speak to him at all but he's kept his word in letting me know when he reaches somewhere new that he's travelling too. To go from contact every day to maybe every 2-3 days (as it has been) is hard and that's why I'm in 2 minds about it. Is it he needs a break from me and everything or his way of pushing me away and seeing what I'll do.Posted by Gemgal101Posted by Leo188881He asked at the end of the convo if I was all Good and of course I lied and said "yes" and asked him if he was and he said yes. He did send me a text later with some photo's of his travels as well.Posted by Gemgal101All good. I wanted to know. Has he said anything or picked up on you being upset or is he just acting like nothing is different
Sorry Leo18881. Quoted in post you meant for pinkbird03. 🙃
So he does still care and is keeping in touch. Do you feel like he's making more effort or less effort now?
click to expand
Posted by pinkbird03I had many a convo in my head recently about how I would bring up the situation and exclusiveness was in there possibly saying to him that I didn't mind the unofficial side but would want exclusiveness...I feel in a way that the fact that I know he may/May not be with other people makes me lose respect for myself. That I'm an option and not a choice.Posted by Gemgal101Posted by pinkbird03I will. As for you, sounds like who will give in first and text but love your attitude for standing your ground.Posted by Gemgal101Posted by pinkbird03I do think about him always but just more wondering what he's thinking and because it's sort of a limbo relationship I guess I think about what will be in the future instead of just taking it a day at a time...anxious is my middle name😄
Do you obsess over him a lot? Because I do.....
lol aww. Try to be positive. I think he will come around!
I feel confident about it, oddly. I think it’s because he hasn’t disappeared and he still shows interest even though it’s indirectly.
I think it’s a good sign your guy still talks to you. Somehow you gotta take it to the next level. Would you ever ask him to be exclusive??
click to expand
Posted by Leo188881Do you think going to his work is a good idea?? 2 weeks has been freaking hard. Every day is a struggle. But I’m hoping the saying is true. That men fall in love with you in your absence. Would you consider trying it? This strategy is definitely my last effort before I do move on if he doesn’t come around. I mean let’s face it, they aren’t the best communicators. It’s too hard to get them to talk about feelings and emotional stuff when they don’t want to. I just don’t think it’s a good idea to go to his garage. Believe me, I’ve considered it too!!Posted by pinkbird03Posted by Leo188881Posted by pinkbird03Posted by Leo188881Nope. It’s been two weeks today I believe. Hes still trying to get my attention and he looks at my Snapchat stories. I’ve only posted 2 though because I’m keeping my distance but still living my life ya know what I mean. He looked at one of them within 4 minutes. It made me happy. Yes, breadcrumbs make me happy..... kinda sad. Wish he’d text me.. at this point I think he’s being stubborn. I think we both don’t want to be the first one to text the other.Posted by pinkbird03Have you heard from your guy yet or are you both still ghosting?
Do you obsess over him a lot? Because I do.....
How long are you going to keep it up before you decide it's finished?
I’ll probably text him after 30 days tbh. Hopefully I’ll make it that long!! But I’d love for him to text me first because I haven’t given up on our relationship. I actually think the time apart has been a good thing.
I haven't heard from my Aqua in 2 days. I'm giving him til Monday. If i haven't heard from him, I'm going to his work to talk to his face and work out what's next. I couldn't handle 2 weeks in limbo. I don't know how you do it.
click to expand
Posted by Gemgal101That at the moment I'm an option not a choice.Posted by pinkbird03I had many a convo in my head recently about how I would bring up the situation and exclusiveness was in there possibly saying to him that I didn't mind the unofficial side but would want exclusiveness...I feel in a way that the fact that I know he may/May not be with other people makes me lose respect for myself. That I'm an option and not a choice.Posted by Gemgal101Posted by pinkbird03I will. As for you, sounds like who will give in first and text but love your attitude for standing your ground.Posted by Gemgal101Posted by pinkbird03I do think about him always but just more wondering what he's thinking and because it's sort of a limbo relationship I guess I think about what will be in the future instead of just taking it a day at a time...anxious is my middle name😄
Do you obsess over him a lot? Because I do.....
lol aww. Try to be positive. I think he will come around!
I feel confident about it, oddly. I think it’s because he hasn’t disappeared and he still shows interest even though it’s indirectly.
I think it’s a good sign your guy still talks to you. Somehow you gotta take it to the next level. Would you ever ask him to be exclusive??
click to expand
Posted by Gemgal101Say it to him. After 18 months, you deserve exclusivity at the least.Posted by pinkbird03I had many a convo in my head recently about how I would bring up the situation and exclusiveness was in there possibly saying to him that I didn't mind the unofficial side but would want exclusiveness...I feel in a way that the fact that I know he may/May not be with other people makes me lose respect for myself. That I'm an option and not a choice.Posted by Gemgal101Posted by pinkbird03I will. As for you, sounds like who will give in first and text but love your attitude for standing your ground.Posted by Gemgal101Posted by pinkbird03I do think about him always but just more wondering what he's thinking and because it's sort of a limbo relationship I guess I think about what will be in the future instead of just taking it a day at a time...anxious is my middle name😄
Do you obsess over him a lot? Because I do.....
lol aww. Try to be positive. I think he will come around!
I feel confident about it, oddly. I think it’s because he hasn’t disappeared and he still shows interest even though it’s indirectly.
I think it’s a good sign your guy still talks to you. Somehow you gotta take it to the next level. Would you ever ask him to be exclusive??
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Posted by Leo188881I'm trying to let him initiate contact instead of bombarding with texts.Posted by Gemgal101Posted by Leo188881He's been away before and contacted me in some way every day and told me he missed me on those occasions. This is different but this is a trip he's wanted to do for ages and he seemed rather withdrawn before he left like everything was becoming too much so I kinda thought I wouldn't speak to him at all but he's kept his word in letting me know when he reaches somewhere new that he's travelling too. To go from contact every day to maybe every 2-3 days (as it has been) is hard and that's why I'm in 2 minds about it. Is it he needs a break from me and everything or his way of pushing me away and seeing what I'll do.Posted by Gemgal101Posted by Leo188881He asked at the end of the convo if I was all Good and of course I lied and said "yes" and asked him if he was and he said yes. He did send me a text later with some photo's of his travels as well.Posted by Gemgal101All good. I wanted to know. Has he said anything or picked up on you being upset or is he just acting like nothing is different
Sorry Leo18881. Quoted in post you meant for pinkbird03. 🙃
So he does still care and is keeping in touch. Do you feel like he's making more effort or less effort now?
Are you contacting him at all? Or do you jist wait for him to initiate all contact?
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Posted by pinkbird03I know. Something has to be said....Posted by Gemgal101Say it to him. After 18 months, you deserve exclusivity at the least.Posted by pinkbird03I had many a convo in my head recently about how I would bring up the situation and exclusiveness was in there possibly saying to him that I didn't mind the unofficial side but would want exclusiveness...I feel in a way that the fact that I know he may/May not be with other people makes me lose respect for myself. That I'm an option and not a choice.Posted by Gemgal101Posted by pinkbird03I will. As for you, sounds like who will give in first and text but love your attitude for standing your ground.Posted by Gemgal101Posted by pinkbird03I do think about him always but just more wondering what he's thinking and because it's sort of a limbo relationship I guess I think about what will be in the future instead of just taking it a day at a time...anxious is my middle name😄
Do you obsess over him a lot? Because I do.....
lol aww. Try to be positive. I think he will come around!
I feel confident about it, oddly. I think it’s because he hasn’t disappeared and he still shows interest even though it’s indirectly.
I think it’s a good sign your guy still talks to you. Somehow you gotta take it to the next level. Would you ever ask him to be exclusive??
click to expand
Posted by Gemgal101It’s his loss if he doesn’t want you. No more wasting your time on him if that’s the case. You could find someone else. Plenty of fish in the seaPosted by pinkbird03I know. Something has to be said....Posted by Gemgal101Say it to him. After 18 months, you deserve exclusivity at the least.Posted by pinkbird03I had many a convo in my head recently about how I would bring up the situation and exclusiveness was in there possibly saying to him that I didn't mind the unofficial side but would want exclusiveness...I feel in a way that the fact that I know he may/May not be with other people makes me lose respect for myself. That I'm an option and not a choice.Posted by Gemgal101Posted by pinkbird03I will. As for you, sounds like who will give in first and text but love your attitude for standing your ground.Posted by Gemgal101Posted by pinkbird03I do think about him always but just more wondering what he's thinking and because it's sort of a limbo relationship I guess I think about what will be in the future instead of just taking it a day at a time...anxious is my middle name😄
Do you obsess over him a lot? Because I do.....
lol aww. Try to be positive. I think he will come around!
I feel confident about it, oddly. I think it’s because he hasn’t disappeared and he still shows interest even though it’s indirectly.
I think it’s a good sign your guy still talks to you. Somehow you gotta take it to the next level. Would you ever ask him to be exclusive??
click to expand
Posted by Leo188881..let me know how it goes if you do go into his work..sending you positiveness and hope it all falls into place for you...nothing but happiness for you is all I wish..Posted by pinkbird03If i had to deal with 2 weeks of nothing, after trying with him, I'd be over him and consider it finished. But i would try to fix it first.Posted by Leo188881Do you think going to his work is a good idea?? 2 weeks has been freaking hard. Every day is a struggle. But I’m hoping the saying is true. That men fall in love with you in your absence. Would you consider trying it? This strategy is definitely my last effort before I do move on if he doesn’t come around. I mean let’s face it, they aren’t the best communicators. It’s too hard to get them to talk about feelings and emotional stuff when they don’t want to. I just don’t think it’s a good idea to go to his garage. Believe me, I’ve considered it too!!Posted by pinkbird03Posted by Leo188881Posted by pinkbird03Posted by Leo188881Nope. It’s been two weeks today I believe. Hes still trying to get my attention and he looks at my Snapchat stories. I’ve only posted 2 though because I’m keeping my distance but still living my life ya know what I mean. He looked at one of them within 4 minutes. It made me happy. Yes, breadcrumbs make me happy..... kinda sad. Wish he’d text me.. at this point I think he’s being stubborn. I think we both don’t want to be the first one to text the other.Posted by pinkbird03Have you heard from your guy yet or are you both still ghosting?
Do you obsess over him a lot? Because I do.....
How long are you going to keep it up before you decide it's finished?
I’ll probably text him after 30 days tbh. Hopefully I’ll make it that long!! But I’d love for him to text me first because I haven’t given up on our relationship. I actually think the time apart has been a good thing.
I haven't heard from my Aqua in 2 days. I'm giving him til Monday. If i haven't heard from him, I'm going to his work to talk to his face and work out what's next. I couldn't handle 2 weeks in limbo. I don't know how you do it.
He hates surprises but I told him ages ago he can't get rid of me and if he ever tries I'll come to his work and seduce him so he's been warned and I'm executing my right to cash in on that threat.
I don't like games and i would rather talk face to face, so if this is how it has to happen, so be it. I'm too old to waste my time waiting around for something that might not happen. Maybe if i show him that he's worth the effort to me, he wont be so guarded. The worst that will happen is we agree it's not going to work and go our separate ways and go on with our lives.
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Posted by pinkbird03Trying to embrace that attitude...:-)Posted by Gemgal101It’s his loss if he doesn’t want you. No more wasting your time on him if that’s the case. You could find someone else. Plenty of fish in the seaPosted by pinkbird03I know. Something has to be said....Posted by Gemgal101Say it to him. After 18 months, you deserve exclusivity at the least.Posted by pinkbird03I had many a convo in my head recently about how I would bring up the situation and exclusiveness was in there possibly saying to him that I didn't mind the unofficial side but would want exclusiveness...I feel in a way that the fact that I know he may/May not be with other people makes me lose respect for myself. That I'm an option and not a choice.Posted by Gemgal101Posted by pinkbird03I will. As for you, sounds like who will give in first and text but love your attitude for standing your ground.Posted by Gemgal101Posted by pinkbird03I do think about him always but just more wondering what he's thinking and because it's sort of a limbo relationship I guess I think about what will be in the future instead of just taking it a day at a time...anxious is my middle name😄
Do you obsess over him a lot? Because I do.....
lol aww. Try to be positive. I think he will come around!
I feel confident about it, oddly. I think it’s because he hasn’t disappeared and he still shows interest even though it’s indirectly.
I think it’s a good sign your guy still talks to you. Somehow you gotta take it to the next level. Would you ever ask him to be exclusive??
click to expand
Posted by Leo188881Do you really think going to his work is really going to get you what you want? It just seems too forced. Not what he wants naturally. My thought process has been- he needs to make the decision on his own to be with me and make the effort to be with me. There’s nothing I can say or do to get him to come to that conclusion. The space apart helps him figure it out and if he comes back to me, it will be the sweetest victory because he did it on his own 😁 if not, then it really wasn’t meant to be. I like this way of breaking up lol. It’s easier on me.Posted by pinkbird03If i had to deal with 2 weeks of nothing, after trying with him, I'd be over him and consider it finished. But i would try to fix it first.Posted by Leo188881Do you think going to his work is a good idea?? 2 weeks has been freaking hard. Every day is a struggle. But I’m hoping the saying is true. That men fall in love with you in your absence. Would you consider trying it? This strategy is definitely my last effort before I do move on if he doesn’t come around. I mean let’s face it, they aren’t the best communicators. It’s too hard to get them to talk about feelings and emotional stuff when they don’t want to. I just don’t think it’s a good idea to go to his garage. Believe me, I’ve considered it too!!Posted by pinkbird03Posted by Leo188881Posted by pinkbird03Posted by Leo188881Nope. It’s been two weeks today I believe. Hes still trying to get my attention and he looks at my Snapchat stories. I’ve only posted 2 though because I’m keeping my distance but still living my life ya know what I mean. He looked at one of them within 4 minutes. It made me happy. Yes, breadcrumbs make me happy..... kinda sad. Wish he’d text me.. at this point I think he’s being stubborn. I think we both don’t want to be the first one to text the other.Posted by pinkbird03Have you heard from your guy yet or are you both still ghosting?
Do you obsess over him a lot? Because I do.....
How long are you going to keep it up before you decide it's finished?
I’ll probably text him after 30 days tbh. Hopefully I’ll make it that long!! But I’d love for him to text me first because I haven’t given up on our relationship. I actually think the time apart has been a good thing.
I haven't heard from my Aqua in 2 days. I'm giving him til Monday. If i haven't heard from him, I'm going to his work to talk to his face and work out what's next. I couldn't handle 2 weeks in limbo. I don't know how you do it.
He hates surprises but I told him ages ago he can't get rid of me and if he ever tries I'll come to his work and seduce him so he's been warned and I'm executing my right to cash in on that threat.
I don't like games and i would rather talk face to face, so if this is how it has to happen, so be it. I'm too old to waste my time waiting around for something that might not happen. Maybe if i show him that he's worth the effort to me, he wont be so guarded. The worst that will happen is we agree it's not going to work and go our separate ways and go on with our lives.
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