@boxcarmirnta
11 Years1,000+ Posts
Cancers are generally known for their emotional sensitivity, but they can also experience moments of indifference when they need emotional distance or protection. This does not mean they lack feelings but that they can suppress or hide their emotions when necessary. Their capacity for indifference varies depending on circumstances and personal growth.
100% Yes
it would be similar to the "INFJ doorslam" google that term.
Well I know what INFJ is...but I know as a Pisces with similar strong feelings..indifference is very difficult..PRETENDING to be indifferent, well..thats another story...it would take me a very long time to be truly indifferent to someone that hurt me or affected me in some way..
I understand the door slam and have done it several times myself, but that seems to differ slightly from.actual indifference....
well, on the other hand, both cancers and pisceans are very good at make making each other feel like they dont care when they actually do. I went out with a piscean and our breakup was the most painful one that I've ever had.
But... to answer your original question, yes, it is possible for a cancer to be completely indifferent with time and depending on what actions were done. It probably doesnt happen quickly though.
Posted by rabidtalker
well, on the other hand, both cancers and pisceans are very good at make making each other feel like they dont care when they actually do. I went out with a piscean and our breakup was the most painful one that I've ever had.But... to answer your original question, yes, it is possible for a cancer to be completely indifferent with time and depending on what actions were done. It probably doesnt happen quickly though.
yea I remember you saying that before and its SO accurate..we do!! Its so sad..i wish it wasn't like that..and yea its been extremely painful to end things with mine..
For sure.
lol, quite a number of my friends have used the word aloof to describe me.
I definitely wouldn't of thought of myself that way but I can understand how they could think that
Posted by Arielle83
I've been called aloof my whole life.Once I realise I have no interest in someone for friendship etc. I'm indifferent and cold stone scarielle.
DITTO!! I've had people I went to high school with later tell me they thought I was a snob. lol
Posted by Arielle83
I've been called aloof my whole life.Once I realise I have no interest in someone for friendship etc. I'm indifferent and cold stone scarielle.
DITTO!! I've had people I went to high school with later tell me they thought I was a snob. lol
I'm so aloof, day after high school I changed countries to get away from all those ppl!!
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You beat me on that one. I've never been to any of my high school reunions.
I think you might be shocked by how indifferent we can be. Aloof, cold, fickle, lack of empathy... indifference. All traits of the darkside of the moon. The Cancerian heart can either be so close it consumes you, or so distant you'll question its existence. Contrast is in our nature, and I think that is what drives a lot of people crazy about Cancerians.
Think of the moon's behaviour. It is tidally locked with the Earth, so those viewing it from there will always just see one side to it. The side you don't see, the dark side; is a whole other realm that reveals itself the closer you get. Then there are the phases of the moon. So even those who see us from the distance, still get a glimpse from the full moon where we brighten the entire sky, to new where we seem like just a memory.
Posted by Crabra
I think you might be shocked by how indifferent we can be. Aloof, cold, fickle, lack of empathy... indifference. All traits of the darkside of the moon. The Cancerian heart can either be so close it consumes you, or so distant you'll question its existence. Contrast is in our nature, and I think that is what drives a lot of people crazy about Cancerians.Think of the moon's behaviour. It is tidally locked with the Earth, so those viewing it from there will always just see one side to it. The side you don't see, the dark side; is a whole other realm that reveals itself the closer you get. Then there are the phases of the moon. So even those who see us from the distance, still get a glimpse from the full moon where we brighten the entire sky, to new where we seem like just a memory.
I definitely see this...its just hard to believe feelings can be shut off so quickly..i used to be this way when I was younger but..now..no way..too cold hearted. I'm a cancer rising...its sad to be so close to someone and then have them completely change. So glad I learned my lesson. I know how much it hurts people.
Posted by Crabra
I think you might be shocked by how indifferent we can be. Aloof, cold, fickle, lack of empathy... indifference. All traits of the darkside of the moon. The Cancerian heart can either be so close it consumes you, or so distant you'll question its existence. Contrast is in our nature, and I think that is what drives a lot of people crazy about Cancerians.Think of the moon's behaviour. It is tidally locked with the Earth, so those viewing it from there will always just see one side to it. The side you don't see, the dark side; is a whole other realm that reveals itself the closer you get. Then there are the phases of the moon. So even those who see us from the distance, still get a glimpse from the full moon where we brighten the entire sky, to new where we seem like just a memory.
I definitely see this...its just hard to believe feelings can be shut off so quickly..i used to be this way when I was younger but..now..no way..too cold hearted. I'm a cancer rising...its sad to be so close to someone and then have them completely change. So glad I learned my lesson. I know how much it hurts people.
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Cancerians know how to project their emotions onto others. They reciprocate all action towards them like no one else, both good and bad. More mature crabs learn over time that they can't keep shutting people out as it defeats their entire purpose. It is a challenge we all face.
Posted by boxcarmirnta
I am very curious about this..cuz it seems contrary to your entire way of existing..what with your very strong emotions, and sensitivity...what say you, crabbertons?
What sign are you?
Posted by Crabra
I think you might be shocked by how indifferent we can be. Aloof, cold, fickle, lack of empathy... indifference. All traits of the darkside of the moon. The Cancerian heart can either be so close it consumes you, or so distant you'll question its existence. Contrast is in our nature, and I think that is what drives a lot of people crazy about Cancerians.Think of the moon's behaviour. It is tidally locked with the Earth, so those viewing it from there will always just see one side to it. The side you don't see, the dark side; is a whole other realm that reveals itself the closer you get. Then there are the phases of the moon. So even those who see us from the distance, still get a glimpse from the full moon where we brighten the entire sky, to new where we seem like just a memory.
Yep. It really depends on how much we care. I used to love my ex best friend until I found out she was fucking my husband for years behind my back. When she wouldn't take the hint to stay out of my life and to not contact me I flat out told her every horrible thing about her as a person, and then told her she's dead to me. Since then my ex has tried defending her and let me know all about how much I hurt her, and "how can you be so cold and cruel?". HA FUCKING HA!! They have absolutely no clue how cold and cruel I can be when it's warranted. I'd happily walk past her if she was on fire and not even throw a cup of piss in her direction. Love and hate, I can do both with just as much intensity.
Posted by Crabra
I think you might be shocked by how indifferent we can be. Aloof, cold, fickle, lack of empathy... indifference. All traits of the darkside of the moon. The Cancerian heart can either be so close it consumes you, or so distant you'll question its existence. Contrast is in our nature, and I think that is what drives a lot of people crazy about Cancerians.Think of the moon's behaviour. It is tidally locked with the Earth, so those viewing it from there will always just see one side to it. The side you don't see, the dark side; is a whole other realm that reveals itself the closer you get. Then there are the phases of the moon. So even those who see us from the distance, still get a glimpse from the full moon where we brighten the entire sky, to new where we seem like just a memory.
Yep. It really depends on how much we care. I used to love my ex best friend until I found out she was fucking my husband for years behind my back. When she wouldn't take the hint to stay out of my life and to not contact me I flat out told her every horrible thing about her as a person, and then told her she's dead to me. Since then my ex has tried defending her and let me know all about how much I hurt her, and "how can you be so cold and cruel?". HA FUCKING HA!! They have absolutely no clue how cold and cruel I can be when it's warranted. I'd happily walk past her if she was on fire and not even throw a cup of piss in her direction. Love and hate, I can do both with just as much intensity.
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I am so sorry to hear about that. I hate to hear about a crab getting screwed over, but a double whammy from not only the spouse, but also the best friend is just too much. I'm happy you treated her like that. She deserved it. I hope you left the husband out on the cold too.
People underestimate the pain a Cancerian can cause. Even those who are aware of it can forget how intense our emotions run and they are the driving force behind our action or inaction. It is just not a good idea to try to keep a crab from retreating. We are not fighters in the physical sense, emotionally is where we know how to inflict the pain.
@Cabra I have to have contact with him because we have kids together, but other than co-parenting and custody issues, I have nothing to do with him. I burned the bridge with him standing on it (had him served divorce papers while he was at work).
She's still involved with him, and when him and I are hashing out a disagreement (about the kids) in text she will often take over and start texting for him (I can tell because the writing style changes and becomes her style). When she does that, while pretending it's still him, I usually throw in some insults to target her weak insecurities, like telling him to tell her that I think it's a pity that her lipo seems to have stopped working, or that I think she looks great with more blonde in her hair since I know she's always envied blondes and has always wanted to be blonde and blue eyed (she's steadily bleaching more and more blonde streaks to look like me). The texts always stop cold when I dig at her like that. lol
Posted by YourFavoriteDXPMember
Are cancers capable of indifference?Who gives a damn?
"Obviously" not you, even though you're "not" obsessed with Crabs. 😛
Posted by YourFavoriteDXPMember
No, Dear.I have finally stopped giving a damn, and it is one of the most liberating feelings ever experienced.
Bravo! Now apply that same attitude to other people's sexuality, religion, and politics, and you're on the right track.
I will if I want to. You don't have to listen, though, so carry on.
Also, every time you call me "woman", which I find condescending, I'll start calling you "boy".
Just a followup, if I detect someone is malicious towards me or means me, my friends or family harm, I will definitely shut them out and extremely quickly. It wont be malicious on my part but protection. Probably to the person in question it could appear "mean" but in actuality, no attacks are made on the person, only a setup of a defensive position.
If you want to know the difference, try the same actions and behaviors to a scorpio and you will see a completely non-defensive reaction. That is the difference, a scorpio will look to disarm you, and whatever harm it does to you be damned, but a cancer will look to build a fortress from you.
Also, as an example, I have a scorpio friend who told me a very revealing statement:
"If someone attacks you, make sure they can never do it again."
Posted by rabidtalker
Also, as an example, I have a scorpio friend who told me a very revealing statement:"If someone attacks you, make sure they can never do it again."
Yep, I've heard similar statements from a scorpio friend. lol
Posted by rabidtalker
Also, as an example, I have a scorpio friend who told me a very revealing statement:"If someone attacks you, make sure they can never do it again."
Yep, I've heard similar statements from a scorpio friend. lol
But sometimes indifference is the best way to get back at someone
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you can be never sure about the "indifference" any water sign shows you........ air signs and earth signs are the same (OK, air signs a bit less)
the only indifference you can be sure of, is from fire signs....... but even with them, you cannot be sure, if its a real indifference or a hurt ego....
if a water sign ignores you and shows indifference, its a bigger statement, than if they are friendly....... at water signs, if they are friendly, after something bad or break up, its worse than the "feigned indifference"....... just let them cool off and take your time......... same with earth signs....... but water signs is the worst about showing indifference, when in fact, they are hurting deeply......... and if they are hurting deeply, dont access them, really, just take your time
as I said in my previous post: "the only indifference you can be sure of, is from fire signs....... but even with them, you cannot be sure, if its a real indifference or a hurt ego...."
note: with the fire sign, you will know in a short time, they cant keep it inside 🙂 but with water and earth signs, this indifference and hurt feelings can take years to wear off.......... they definitely think about it and you, just will not show it for a long time...... but will never forget....
at air signs they will shut you out completely and will not even remember you (unless there is a heavy water or earth placements)
but all water signs react differently - pisces will dream on and think of different "hollywood type" of reconciliation and will never give up..... pisces are not to hold grudges or be vindictive...... cancer is more vindictive and more "active" in hating (and definitely showing it, they can even show up at your mutual place with a new girlfrined/boyfriend...... they try to actively hurt you)........ the most active is a scorpio, but with a scorpio, its nearly like with fire signs..... you definitely know, where you stand with a scorpio...... no "arranged" indifference like with pisces and cancers.....
Posted by rabidtalker
Also, as an example, I have a scorpio friend who told me a very revealing statement:"If someone attacks you, make sure they can never do it again."
Yep, I've heard similar statements from a scorpio friend. lol
But sometimes indifference is the best way to get back at someone
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I agree! I'm just not as good as Scorpios on making people pay.
Posted by rabidtalker
Also, as an example, I have a scorpio friend who told me a very revealing statement:"If someone attacks you, make sure they can never do it again."
Yep, I've heard similar statements from a scorpio friend. lol
But sometimes indifference is the best way to get back at someone
you can be never sure about the "indifference" any water sign shows you........ air signs and earth signs are the same (OK, air signs a bit less)
the only indifference you can be sure of, is from fire signs....... but even with them, you cannot be sure, if its a real indifference or a hurt ego....
if a water sign ignores you and shows indifference, its a bigger statement, than if they are friendly....... at water signs, if they are friendly, after something bad or break up, its worse than the "feigned indifference"....... just let them cool off and take your time......... same with earth signs....... but water signs is the worst about showing indifference, when in fact, they are hurting deeply......... and if they are hurting deeply, dont access them, really, just take your time
I don't know. I've been accused of being cold very often. Especially when i cut someone off. They don't always understand why. But who cares. I know why i do it so fuck em and their opinion and feelings.
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I'm with Lala on this. If I say I don't care, even if I hate that person, then they will get zero interest from me and I won't try to follow them around to make them jealous, etc. because I really don't care what they're doing or how they feel. The exception to that is if that person continues to meddle in my life, even from a distance, then I'll find a way to exploit their weakness/insecurities, because it's payback for not staying away and leaving me alone. In other words, when I say I'm done with someone, I really mean it and if they can't take that hint then I'll make sure they hurt for continuing to get in my way.
Posted by rabidtalker
Also, as an example, I have a scorpio friend who told me a very revealing statement:"If someone attacks you, make sure they can never do it again."
Yep, I've heard similar statements from a scorpio friend. lol
But sometimes indifference is the best way to get back at someone
you can be never sure about the "indifference" any water sign shows you........ air signs and earth signs are the same (OK, air signs a bit less)
the only indifference you can be sure of, is from fire signs....... but even with them, you cannot be sure, if its a real indifference or a hurt ego....
if a water sign ignores you and shows indifference, its a bigger statement, than if they are friendly....... at water signs, if they are friendly, after something bad or break up, its worse than the "feigned indifference"....... just let them cool off and take your time......... same with earth signs....... but water signs is the worst about showing indifference, when in fact, they are hurting deeply......... and if they are hurting deeply, dont access them, really, just take your time
I don't know. I've been accused of being cold very often. Especially when i cut someone off. They don't always understand why. But who cares. I know why i do it so fuck em and their opinion and feelings.
I'm with Lala on this. If I say I don't care, even if I hate that person, then they will get zero interest from me and I won't try to follow them around to make them jealous, etc. because I really don't care what they're doing or how they feel. The exception to that is if that person continues to meddle in my life, even from a distance, then I'll find a way to exploit their weakness/insecurities, because it's payback for not staying away and leaving me alone. In other words, when I say I'm done with someone, I really mean it and if they can't take that hint then I'll make sure they hurt for continuing to get in my way.
ðŸ‘ðŸ‘
Maybe it's my cancer rising
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Plus all the rest of the water in your chart 🙂
Posted by thinktoomuch
I don´t understand the question - I mean, NOBODY will or can care about EVERYTHING, you´re always indifferent to something. Some things matter to you, others don´t. ....Sounds like you´re asking more about what changes, if somebody who used to care about you now show they do not/are indifferent. No?
no..it just genuinely seems to me..that sooooo much feeling and intensity that it is "feigned indifference" like Pandora said... Indifference is apathy..total lack of feeling, not caring either way..shutting someone out involves LOTS of feeling..good or bad doe whatever reason.theres a difference between cold shoulder and actual lack of caring. That's what I was curious about. Thx for the input all..i am a Pisces with cancer rising . I shut ppl out or did, out of hurt, definitely NOT indifference.
I know my ex is fucking with me and feigning indifference and prolly trying to hurt me on purpose....tho we have talked some and I figured out some stuff, he is still cold...someday ill get my back...slow progress...
*stuff back...!!!
^^ I don't need to call the police, I know ill get it back now..i was just curious..cuz this behavior is so bizarre!!
I thought everyone was indifferent to toxic soul sucking assholes? Nobody has time for that on this life ride.
Posted by kissmygrits
I thought everyone was indifferent to toxic soul sucking assholes? Nobody has time for that on this life ride.
Pisces people are eternal dreamers, the reality is always blurred with dreams, hope never dies is their motto...... so its not use to urge someone to move on, when is not ready...... grieving and dreaming are their essential part......
the only thing which helps is to shift the dreams and emotions to somebody else, finding somebody else, who is just as bad...... (it would be unfair to somebody nice)
my friend calles this "the method of healing your broken arm by breaking your leg" 🙂 shifting the pain
Posted by kissmygrits
I thought everyone was indifferent to toxic soul sucking assholes? Nobody has time for that on this life ride.Pisces people are eternal dreamers, the reality is always blurred with dreams, hope never dies is their motto...... so its not use to urge someone to move on, when is not ready...... grieving and dreaming are their essential part......
the only thing which helps is to shift the dreams and emotions to somebody else, finding somebody else, who is just as bad...... (it would be unfair to somebody nice)
my friend calles this "the method of healing your broken arm by breaking your leg" 🙂 shifting the pain
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true true...but I feel pretty good about where I am in this situation. I've moved past it for the most part...he doesn't have a hold on me at all. And I don't need to be indifferent, I can love and let go and that makes me happy.
Posted by rabidtalker
well, on the other hand, both cancers and pisceans are very good at make making each other feel like they dont care when they actually do. I went out with a piscean and our breakup was the most painful one that I've ever had.But... to answer your original question, yes, it is possible for a cancer to be completely indifferent with time and depending on what actions were done. It probably doesnt happen quickly though.
So damn freaking true
Definitely. It's not like I don't feel anything inside, but even though I feel something strongly I would come across as indifferent to someone else. Many people have actually accused me of this lol.
Posted by DonnaElvira77
Well yes of course ... we do tend to give extreme reactions either way ..but yes of course. Like anyone.
Good point, not only that Cancers can show indifference - but their indifference can be extreme. One day - you're someone they're really fond of - the next... they might withdraw in their shell - and act as if you don't event exist from their on.... 😢 It's quite hard to approach a cancer - once it withdraws in its cold shell.
Posted by DonnaElvira77
Well yes of course ... we do tend to give extreme reactions either way ..but yes of course. Like anyone.Good point, not only that Cancers can show indifference - but their indifference can be extreme. One day - you're someone they're really fond of - the next... they might withdraw in their shell - and act as if you don't event exist from their on.... 😢 It's quite hard to approach a cancer - once it withdraws in its cold shell.
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extremely hard!! Almost impossible.
Its not " all this stuff" Its just some sentimental shit ill get back shortly.
Yes we do have a darkside. I shut ppl out im aloof cold and i have an i dont care attitude etc. I like to be left alone. I mean thats what the crab is. Very independent dont mess with me or i will snap u with my claw let me be in my shell minding my business lol. Darkside of the cancer loners. I think each sign symbol is what we need to work on not what our strength is. Cancer needs to come out the hard shell and open up not be so hard in their shell. Libras need balance because most arent even balanced or fair. Leos need stop being so stubborn like the king of the jungle capricorns take too much bs eating all the grass and shi Aquarius are the water barriers in which they need balance of the head and the heart the pouring of emotions....u get my drift...so yes cancers we r nurturing loving caring etc but we can be quite cold and not caring at all.
Oh and i dont ever hurt ppl on purpose atleast i care about others feelings im very polite and loving i rather u hurt me etc.
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I am very curious about this..cuz it seems contrary to your entire way of existing..what with your very strong emotions, and sensitivity...what say you, crabbertons?