Confused with a Cancer Girl

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lookoutbelow84
@lookoutbelow84
13 Years

Comments: 0 · Posts: 18 · Topics: 2
Ive been friends with this cancer girl for years, we are in the same group of people. We have always been sort of respectuful of each other but never really overtly flirty or anything. I was interested in her a few times and we sort of toyed with the idea of dating but never really did. Anyway this year we were at our annual Christmas party and just said hey to each other, some light conversation. A few days later I dropped off a bottle of wine (Christmas gift) she made a deal about inviting me in, we played a board game, drank a little, and hung out. We were both a little flirty but nothing serious. After that she sent me a "thanks for hanging out text" with winks saying we should hang out again etc. I work 7 (days)on/7off and right after Christmas I started my 7s. I sent her a message over new years, and again she responded with 3-4 sentences, pretty flirty, saying "I hope this year is filled with many night of board games etc etc..." So at this point Im thinking "ok... well lets just see where this goes no pressure, will be fun." So I finish my on week 3 days later and call her, she calls me back but I missed it, call her again and never hear back form her. I waited a couple of days and invited her to a Sushi making class that night, but she already had plans. The weird thing is its like she is cold all of the sudden. Her texts are now dry and cut short, not flirty at all, and basically leave me nowhere to go. Is this normal behavior for a Cancer woman? Or is it just that now Im putting a little effort into it she is getting cocky? Seems to me like I should just bail but I would like to give it a shot with her. However if shes just screwing around im certainly not going to be her bi**h... 🙂
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OceanDeep
@OceanDeep
14 Years1,000+ Posts

Comments: 12 · Posts: 2004 · Topics: 22
Hmmmmm, first thought? She heard something about you, and/or something that has her scared now of your intentions with her. Do you have a reputation with the women? Bad last breakup? Seemingly don't get serious with women? Recent breakup? Still have communciation or doings with your ex?

Anything that your mutual friends would tell her, OR that if she did enough looking into you that would send her a red flag.
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lookoutbelow84
@lookoutbelow84
13 Years

Comments: 0 · Posts: 18 · Topics: 2
Cant think of anything really. Only thing I can think of is she dated one of my friends a while back. He is kind of a sneaky little bastard. He is always making people look bad, tossing in comments, just a kind of jackass. Weve almost gone to town for it a few times as Im more of the straight up be honest and let people have their space kind of guys. But Im pretty sure he is still into her (his current girlfriend was not happy about last he spent all day with her) and I wouldnt put it past him to try and say something. They were done years ago though, and if I did catch him doing something like that there would definitely be trouble. Truthgfully though I dont think he even knows about it. Its just strange. Is there a way to gently reapproach her or should I just take off. Im kind of torn between something like you said or she just isnt interested all of the sudden.
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OceanDeep
@OceanDeep
14 Years1,000+ Posts

Comments: 12 · Posts: 2004 · Topics: 22
Well, she may have mentioned it and he knows. My first thought was she was scared off or turned off by something so this might be the source.

I would gently approach her again. Do so though only if you truly are interested in getting to know her more, and possibly dating her if it works to that favor. Don't give up too soon, but just tread lightly enough that she won't feel pressured by anything. And if she doesnt reply, then you will have your answer. That will be her way of saying she isn't interested or not sure, but doesnt know how to tell you or broach the subject. And you don't want to do any damage, so if you come on where she will feel pressured, or in any way cornered, she may lash out.

What would be a good way you think you could feel her out if she would be interested? And also, I'm assuming she is fully aware AND understands your work schedule? So she's not thinking it's a lack of interest on YOUR end because of the sporadic contact from you. Don't assume she knows or understood, really think about it if you know for sure she knows/understands.
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lookoutbelow84
@lookoutbelow84
13 Years

Comments: 0 · Posts: 18 · Topics: 2
Good advice Ocean, thank you. When I asked her to the class her message was "Im at a play tonight. Sorry cant make it to sushi. Talk to you soon." And I didnt hear from her after that. Just seems pretty closed ended to me. She asked me about my schedule so she should know about it. I guess I just cant think of a good way to reapproach her without coming off as clingy? And my intentions 🙂 Of course I want to sleep with her 😉 but really I would like us to get to know each other better, and yes if it works out date. I think we would have a ton of fun together. So this play was on Thursday night. Im happy to wait another day or two and then send a text? Truthfully I feel like I come off clingy sometimes even though Im actually more of a no pressure kind of guy. Unfortunately that also means I hesitate to engage too soon to compensate for that. So really trying to avoid all that in this case. Just have to say though its tough waiting to see someone for 7 days and then getting the cold shoulder... not a good thing.
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OceanDeep
@OceanDeep
14 Years1,000+ Posts

Comments: 12 · Posts: 2004 · Topics: 22
Awww, well at least you're honest ... And you sound sweet 🙂

Well, technically we're now at a week since New Years. I think if you sent a text Sunday or Monday (if youre curiousity can keep holding out for another day or two lol), I would ask her again. I dont think that is clingy at all. Not as a woman, or a Cancerian woman. If you were asking everyday, then yes...but a week is a safe bet and nice set of pace 😉

If she says no, or makes it clear that she is not interested in going on a date with you at all, like ever... dont clam up and not say anything or get spouty. Just tell her okay and that if shes ever interested in doing something to give you a call or shoot you a text.

And not saying you would or wouldnt do it that way, BUT coming from this Cancerian woman it puts a sour taste in my mouth about the man if he shows any bit of indifference towards me afterwards, becomes pouty, becomes pissed, doesnt take no for an answer if I have clearly said no, etc. This prob is both as a woman, and too as a Cancerian woman.

You want to keep yourself in a good light in her eyes, but not become overbearing afterwards and trying to convince her by 'oh, if I keep talking with her even more she'll change her mind' OR 'I don't want to see clingy so I wont bother to text her again' ... you wanna keep it kind of at an even keel but just a little less. This will show you are a good sport about things BUT because you never know...we do and tend to change our minds more frequently than not, unless of course we are forced to stick with our decision on someone, which is awhole other topic and one that doesnt need to be discussed here because we are in the beginning part of a potential budding romance ...yey! 🙂
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OceanDeep
@OceanDeep
14 Years1,000+ Posts

Comments: 12 · Posts: 2004 · Topics: 22
Dang it accidentally hit post message lol

Con't.... ** this will show you are a good sport about everything BUT if you pull away a bit, just slightly and direct yourself elsewhere whether work, etc. if at any point BEFORE she turned you down she had interest in you, it will make her wonder why the pull away and she may come around peeking to see what you're doing, up to, etc. And all of this info is because you never know, we do and tend to change our minds....

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lookoutbelow84
@lookoutbelow84
13 Years

Comments: 0 · Posts: 18 · Topics: 2
Posted by OceanDeep
Dang it accidentally hit post message lol

Lol premature poster 😉

Yeah good advice Ocean thanks. By the way the timeline was new years, and then I started my off week 2 days later. So this off week stuff has happenned since then. The play was this last Thursday night. But definitely I dont like chasing people who arent interested... not my bag. In terms of holding my interest thats alright, weve been noticing each other for years... I can wait a week 🙂 Historically though I think ive always taken any negative sign as final and Ive heard before that people didnt know I was interested. But yeah I like it, maybe a text Monday, not asking her out but just a little flirt. Who knows maybe blantantly asking her to hang out after we have been friends for so long was a little forward?
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OceanDeep
@OceanDeep
14 Years1,000+ Posts

Comments: 12 · Posts: 2004 · Topics: 22
Its the only thing Im premature in 😉 haha

OOooooooooooooo, you have me SO curious now what your sign is. And the fact you haven't mentioned it—?...makes me wonder if you purposefully left that out?? Spit it out Mister! haha

Okay, so Im confused. Bear with me, just waking up and coffee hasnt kicked in AND Im lacking on proper sleep due to work related insomnia. When did you ask her to the play, starting from today. Don't add in your days of work or not working. My math skills today are less than stellar haha
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OceanDeep
@OceanDeep
14 Years1,000+ Posts

Comments: 12 · Posts: 2004 · Topics: 22
Ahhhhh, flirt! haha

Okay, so you asked her on Thursday to go to the play on Thursday night. Yup, keep it to Monday...not because I feel she thinks anything bad ... we don't know, just basing off of the change you felt; BUT, this way it keeps her wondering and you at a bit of a distance away.

Hmmm, how to approach her on Monday. You say you felt that difference in her...was it just that one time (most recently), or it seemed consistent. She may have been in a hurry and didnt mean to come off short with you. And you HAVE or HAVE NOT text and/or heard from her since Thurs—

If you have been chatting on and off since Thurs, I would be a little flirty if you feel she has continuously been open to that. Get a feel for her, what shes been up to, yada yada, and that you're thinking of maybe doing such and such, or going such and such. See what her response is. Then ask her. Straight out ask, point blank and direct if she would like to be your date and go with.

Now, I waiver on saying date. The reason being is for me, if I know that it is a date date, and even if youre my friend, I will panic and not be myself. It changes things then, the shift in us. If we keep it light and airy, and no definition or defining of anything in the beginning first encounters or so, it loosens me up and keeps me loosened up. BUT, I also have a Gem asc and venus, so the light and airy may be from that. HOWEVER, I know that if I am NOT sure if it is a date or just two people hanging out, then I become confused, worried, leery of what if the person doesnt feel its a date and Im taking it wrong in thinking it is...so in THTAT sense, I like to not have a guessing game, because then there again I won't be myself because I wont know how to act or proceed.

And at NO point after you have officially asked her out on an a official date do you indicate you want to get in her pants. Stay chill on that bit for awhile or date or two...... Unless of course she brings it up, or jumps you first 😉 lol
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lookoutbelow84
@lookoutbelow84
13 Years

Comments: 0 · Posts: 18 · Topics: 2
I really noticed the change on Tuesday. I called her (left a message), she called me back (left a message), I called again (didnt leave a message, each call was about an hour apart). Was hoping to hear form her but when I didnt thats when I called her on Thursady and invited her to a Sushi class for that night. And then havent talked to her since. And btw Tuesday was the first day of my off week 😉
And I agree, better to keep is light and non-committal. But Im also feeling my man sense saying im the doing all the work here and not getting anything back... I need to change that interaction.
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OceanDeep
@OceanDeep
14 Years1,000+ Posts

Comments: 12 · Posts: 2004 · Topics: 22
But Im also feeling my man sense saying im the doing all the work here and not getting anything back... I need to change that interaction.



LOL, it's strange reading that you feel that way ... a man's perspective and feelings about vs. what I see or viewed it as. To me it didnt seem like all that long. Not that you arent trying, you are, just for a few days and feeling like shes not interested and youre doing it all. Kinda cool to see or realize you guys really dont waste too much time, if you think shes not into you: NEXT. Good dating perseptive on that one, I needed that 🙂

Well, then ask her out today. Do it. What difference does it make, really. Or, send a feeler text first, better yet. Do that...see if she's warming up to you more or not. And get a feel for her, and her plans etc. Then maybe ask her out for next week. DO IT. Yup. Do it.
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OceanDeep
@OceanDeep
14 Years1,000+ Posts

Comments: 12 · Posts: 2004 · Topics: 22
Posted by lookoutbelow84
Lol. Yeah dating is a PITA. The sense of urgency is that we already waited a week while I was working. I was excited. Its like your taking a vacation and you fly to Hawaii. Then you say, F it ill just spend the whole time in the airport... So yeah who knows maybe I jsut read into it.



Good analogy! lol Okay good luck!!! Im sure all will be goooooooooooooood 🙂
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Mooniemooneyes
@Mooniemooneyes
13 YearsCancer

Comments: 0 · Posts: 255 · Topics: 22
I will share my 2 cents with you.

It is generally normal for Cancer girls to act slow. Be flirtatious on occasion. And at others to just seem like they do not care. This is what most people misread.She may be just being cautious, or maybe something is happening in her life? She invited you in, played board games, and let you know about it. This speaks volumes imo. With cancers, esp females, something may happen the second and they will cancel. It is nothing personal, although I know it is nor right. Dry not flirty...think about who you are dealing with. Cancer females make no sense, they over analyze. They will step back a little because you see cancers experience internal emotions very strongly to the point of the emotions scaring them. I doubt that she is being cocky, but I do not know her so that true analysis is all you.

If I give you any advice it would be to just wait. If you like her show that you do by keeping contact with her. Don't send her daily messages but every few days is fine. Do not suffocate her, but show that you care. If you go all hot and then drop out thinking that she is cold to you, she will probably interpret that as..."he liked me he wanted to bang me and now that he didn't he ran off." This is what I hear from some cancer females. And this is also something that I think being a Cancer female.
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lookoutbelow84
@lookoutbelow84
13 Years

Comments: 0 · Posts: 18 · Topics: 2
Interesting perspective Moonie, thanks. And just for the record her and her sister invited me in and we all played a board game, then just the two of us watched a movie afterward. If a woman isnt showing signs of interest its not that I want to forget about them but Im not going to try and pester them into it lol... In my experience if a woman is interested you know, hesitant or not. So yeah just trying to decide if she is genuinely hesitant or just not interested at all.
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OceanDeep
@OceanDeep
14 Years1,000+ Posts

Comments: 12 · Posts: 2004 · Topics: 22
Posted by lookoutbelow84
Interesting perspective Moonie, thanks. And just for the record her and her sister invited me in and we all played a board game, then just the two of us watched a movie afterward. If a woman isnt showing signs of interest its not that I want to forget about them but Im not going to try and pester them into it lol... In my experience if a woman is interested you know, hesitant or not. So yeah just trying to decide if she is genuinely hesitant or just not interested at all.




Yey!! Been patiently waiting for a progress report!! haha Okay Leeb, listen. Youre kinda doing the same thing, only youre a Libra and shes a Cancer. Youre afraid to ask too!!! So, why didn't you ask her when you two were sitting there alone? Or before you left— Us Cancers girl dont tend to do that sort of thing. Takes a lot.

Heres an example. Known this Gem guy for years. Where I live now, I used to come to the area to visit my Mom and Step dad. He was one of the first kids my age to meet, a year older than I. We remained friends, technically, but as lives go on, etc. your friendships arent as strong but ya see each other, "Hey!!" and you catch up. Two or three years ago, same thing. Hes divorced, two kids, we talked about it all. Lost touch. I'm what you would say sitting on my mountain right now...what i call it. I announced on FB that I was leaving indefinitely and on hiatus, and wanted to be left alone while I do my self reflecting. He reaches out, brings up a cup of coffee I promised him three years ago, and can relate to my mountain sitting. I make good on that cup of coffee, and set a time up to meet him so we can chit chat. We talk for hours. The next night hes in town to Christmas shop, asks me for pizza. Again, we talk for hours. Thurs night, Im at work and he shows up with becuase he was in town! In between I was sending random texts,etc. but not a whole lot. Am I interested if he would ask me out on a date? Sure. Do I know if these were dates or not? Nope. I don't look at them at dates, just two friends hanging out. Am I leery of him, being a guy vs friend? Yup, he has a profile on Match.com. So if he HAS interest in me, he hasn't officially asked me out AND he is actively on Match. So, I decide to see...ask him if he wanted to get together this weekend, he hestitated in his response. 😉 Goes on to say he had to work yesterday, and Sund
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OceanDeep
@OceanDeep
14 Years1,000+ Posts

Comments: 12 · Posts: 2004 · Topics: 22
and Sunday, when I asked about...sometime this weekend, either Sat or Sun, he said Sun. probably would be better. Well, I took it as not interested. He hesitated, and so I said or 'or whatever if it doesnt work thats okay too.' Now mind you, he kept asking me what my plans were for the night, Fri night. Again, seemingly showing interest....so THATS when I thought I would suggest Sat or Sun meeting up for coffee again. He said if something changed Sat he would get ahold of me. Well, here it is going on 1400 hours SUNDAY and I havent heard from him. At this point do I think he's interested in me beyond friendship? Nope. Even though all my friends AND Mom said hes showing signs of interest. They had me convinced by New Years he was. Well, I didn't hold my breath, and I'm still not. Hes not interested.

Now if he rings me or sends a text asking if I want to meet him today, I will turn him down. A man who is interested OR truly is looking at friendship...either way, he wouldve contacted me by now rather than leaving me wonder if we are meeting for coffee today or not. I was the one who asked,I did my work. He couldnt but suggested Sunday would be better, and he dropped the ball in my eyes. At this point, and I certain, and do I feel hes serial dating? Yup. And do I think he feels he has a shoe in with me, if he has a dateless night? Yup. So I will tell him I made plans, and maybe another time. From here on out, I will make certain he is aware that I am going to be actively dating. If he wants to date me, then he better step up.
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lookoutbelow84
@lookoutbelow84
13 Years

Comments: 0 · Posts: 18 · Topics: 2
Lol well I wasnt sure she was even flirting with me until later in the night. And I kind of thought we did hint to each other that we would hang out on my off week. Certainly nothing concrete though. Thats why I called her on Tuesday (my first off day, and then invited her out on Thursday). Thats what kind of threw me, thought we were on the same page. And the reason I think about this stuff is that I often get that "your a nice guy" treatment. I am, but im still a male 😉. And unfortunately ive been in a few situations where by the time my gf realized that I wasnt going to let her walk all over me she had gone so far over the line it was waaaaay too late. So Im always wary of when a girl stops showing interest.
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lookoutbelow84
@lookoutbelow84
13 Years

Comments: 0 · Posts: 18 · Topics: 2
Sorry prematurely posted 😉
So I did ask. ANd im alright if she is busy or whatever. But usually if a woman is busy and still wants to see you she will at least grease the rails. Something like "Hey! Cant make it tonight but what about tomorrow afternoon?" ANd that is what changed, she wasnt hinting, flirting, or initiating even a hey whats up text message. Generally I feel if I initiate contact a couple of times and they dont at all she isnt interested.
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OceanDeep
@OceanDeep
14 Years1,000+ Posts

Comments: 12 · Posts: 2004 · Topics: 22
So what are you losing either way by simply asking her out? Point blank. If she hmmm and haaas then I would say screw it too. Today, right now, step away from the dxp.net, and ask her out. You will know either way, thus knowing if you should look elsewhere or figure out what you are going to where on your date with her 🙂 Do it!!! Cmon, this is YOUR life 😉
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Mooniemooneyes
@Mooniemooneyes
13 YearsCancer

Comments: 0 · Posts: 255 · Topics: 22
Ocean Deep.
Exactly the same thing I started to think before reading what you wrote.
Ask her straight out. We Cancers although are not the direct type of people, blame it on the cancer animal, we do like straight forward approaches. Cancer females are not typical women. So be mindful of that when dealing with this one. Less showing of intentions usually means HELLOOOOOO EMOTIONS! Ask her how she is, ask her how the weeks looks, and then ask her if she wants to go do something with you. But of course make sure that "something" is an actual event, like get coffee or whatever.

I have had a handful of males who I liked, the problem with that situation was that they assumed that I did not care for them as much as they did. My life was busy and I something had to cancel, then again theirs was as well. They did the same thing you wrote. Assumed I has not interested and went away. It was very unfortunate I think because their interactions with other females scared them. If you like her push it forward, just don't push so hard as to toss her over the ledge. 🙂

Good Luck and keep us posted! 🙂
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lookoutbelow84
@lookoutbelow84
13 Years

Comments: 0 · Posts: 18 · Topics: 2
... OK.... lol....
So I took your guys' advice and decided to go for it.


Me: You know, I just saw this bum with yellow teeth, crazy eyes, and the worst looking jeans I have ever seen. Totally reminded me of you.

Her: That sucks for me 😢


Me: Lol sorry saw that and had to share it. Hows your week been?

Super busy I just got off work. You?

Me: Ah I didnt realize you worked on Sundays. Pretty busy as well job hunting so Im rewriting my resume. Actually I was watching this documentary in the background and it had a bunch of elephants in it and reminded me of your painting. (she has a painting made by an elephant in Thailand, how cool is that).

*after 30 mins of hearing nothing*

Me: And hey sorry I didnt mean to say you looked like a homeless guy. Just thought it would give you a laugh.

*after 2 hours...nothing*
Now I have a witty sense of humor and am, on occassion, accused of being an ass (with good intentions). However this might actually take the all time top honor... and my intentions were so good. Shit.
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OceanDeep
@OceanDeep
14 Years1,000+ Posts

Comments: 12 · Posts: 2004 · Topics: 22
God if you were here I dont know if Id hug ya for feeling bad, or slug ya for being a dufuss lol

STILL you did not ask her out! LOL Okay... woman to man, to ask a woman out you do NOT start it out with a funny insult lol I know you were thinking she would find it funny and typically maybe she wouldve BUT at the same time you are trying to also warm her up to accepting a date with you. So she may be a lil confused right now by you. And if she likes you, she may be uber sensitive to those things, it tends to do that AND you hung out last night and didnt ask her out, so she may really think youre not interested, and trying to keep it on 'friend zone'

I dunno, I'm the worst with dating so maybe take what I say and throw it out lol But too, you may end up losing out on a good girl if it keeps going like this :S

So, whattya wanna do? Call her up and ask her, no text .... hint, hint, hint ... quit procrastinating out of fear ... hint, hint, hint ...

😄

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lookoutbelow84
@lookoutbelow84
13 Years

Comments: 0 · Posts: 18 · Topics: 2
"AND you hung out last night and didnt ask her out"
?? I didnt hang out with her last night. Havent seen her since Christmas. And Ocean I believe what you are saying is...
http://www.google.com/imgres?um=1&hl=en&sa=N&biw=1532&bih=1187&tbm=isch&tbnid=3zfqTw0mBv4_oM:&imgrefurl=http://www.amazon.com/Train-Crash-Window-Poster-Print/dp/B000WYJW3K&docid=hO8FkW5MPOHS0M&imgurl=http://ecx.images-amazon.com/images/I/51kpop2driL._SL500_AA300_.jpg&w=300&h=300&ei=l2UKT8G6KeqdiQKci_2KCQ&zoom=1&iact=rc&dur=297&sig=106292211243029081030&page=2&tbnh=150&tbnw=150&start=42&ndsp=42&ved=1t:429,r:17,s:42&tx=57&ty=41<BR>
Lol well isnt much of a conversation at this point, I mean wouldnt a phone call be a little... more train wreckish...
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OceanDeep
@OceanDeep
14 Years1,000+ Posts

Comments: 12 · Posts: 2004 · Topics: 22
Posted by lookoutbelow84
Interesting perspective Moonie, thanks. And just for the record her and her sister invited me in and we all played a board game, then just the two of us watched a movie afterward. If a woman isnt showing signs of interest its not that I want to forget about them but Im not going to try and pester them into it lol... In my experience if a woman is interested you know, hesitant or not. So yeah just trying to decide if she is genuinely hesitant or just not interested at all.



Your last post is completely messed up LOL I was able to read some of it, and I soooooooooooo misunderstood this post from earlier ^^^^ :S I thought you meant last night, she got a hold of you again and you went over, etc. Im sorry!!! LOL


Okay, then for sure, call her up and ask her. Seriously now 🙂

BTW, Never heard from Gem today, so I know I was right to not think he was interested. Now, do I think it was right that he stood up a simple text or phone call to let me know it wouldnt work? Nope, so now even as friend I will try my best not to zing him for being rude. LOL But will I take him serious if he asks me out in the future? Nope. Unless there was a death, or fire. See how much damage that did? So if she has a history too of being played, like mine, then stuff like this is going to make her gun shy even more.

So, you are calling her when— 😄 Remember, in the end, this is also for you too. So you know either way...reduce your wondering, and also if you should look elsewhere, ya know? Something just dawned on me though too.......Or are you afraid that if you ask, she says no, then your friendship is messed up, so its easier to assume she isnt interested, that way you dont make waves?
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lookoutbelow84
@lookoutbelow84
13 Years

Comments: 0 · Posts: 18 · Topics: 2
Yeah sorry. BTW that text mess is a link to a photographic representation of ths situation. So...lol after that epic fail you still think I should call her? Ocean im starting to think you just like watching librans suffer. So since I am done listening to my own thinking this situation how about I get a woman to clear a good approach for me lol.
1) Call and say "Ok so have you ever tried hard to get it right and failed clasically... lol yeah that was yesterday.. What I was trying to say is I want to take you out to coffee.."

2) "What are you doing this afternoon, can I take you out to coffee.."

3) "So a homeless guy walks into a bar..." (no im not really considering this.

I also need a good message to leave when she doesnt answer...

BTW Ocean im not sure about your Gemini but just take a look at this situation and how far, from her perspective, my actions were versus what my intentions were. I was actually trying to be sensitive and non-threatening and I ended up telling her she looked like a bum and then trying to laugh it off...lol. When a woman is silent, it is VERY hard for us to know where to take it. Very nerve racking. Just make sure to keep that in mind when you consider his actions.
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OceanDeep
@OceanDeep
14 Years1,000+ Posts

Comments: 12 · Posts: 2004 · Topics: 22
Dang it, was my demonic plan of librian suffering just revealed on public forum—?? lol Naw, Im just a hopeless romantic at heart, and I think you DO have good intentions with this woman, my fellow cancerian sister ... otherwise, I woulda told ya three pages ago to take a long walk off a short dock, and prayed she ran far away from you!! LOL

I say go with #3 haha It would be funny if the epic didnt happen .... wait for maybe date number 4 for that one now 😉

Okay, I would do #2 ... but, say this week. That way if she can't go 'tomorrow' because she has plans or work, etc. you wont take her saying no as rejection. If you say sometime this week, it gives her time to plan her schedule AND too, it is more likely than not she can use that as her cue to tell you shes not interested, if indeed she isnt. So lets say you have Mon thru Wed off, you could mention you have those days off and if it works for her, can you take her for coffee. Now, the kicker on this is, is you somehow want her to know either then or at the date, that it is a 'more than friend' cup of coffee...how do men do that tho, Im clueless...so thats where you come in and do your thing LOL!!! 😄

I"ll take your advice and not be so hard on him 😉 lol But, I really thought he was thinking I was taking things wrong, when really I wasn't until everyone was telling me I was missing his cues. Well guess who was right Johnny— MEEEEEEE lol I know tho that if I don't look at the somewhat rudeness of it, even as a friend, I will be setting it up as an okay thing for him to do SHOULD he ever want to ask me out, so I feel as a woman I should somehow say it wasn't cool, but in a not in your face way, but enough for him to get that yeah, as a friend even, he shoulda been more mindful. Especially since he knows that right now I'm sitting on my mountain figuring out how to rid people in my life who walk on me, AND choosing the wrong men. Ya know? But, it isn't the end of the world, but he should have his nose tapped ;p
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Mooniemooneyes
@Mooniemooneyes
13 YearsCancer

Comments: 0 · Posts: 255 · Topics: 22
Dude here is the 411.. kill the lame pick up lines. Cancers arent into that thing unless its super witty and makes a person rotf. Grow a pair text her or hey call her. Pick up that phone of yours, lets say around 5 or 6 pm. Say hi how are you. I was wondering if you were not busy on so and so and would like to go get coffee, or dinner or something.

DO IT DO IT TOMORROW! or hell if you want Ill do it for you. Just go ask her out already!
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OceanDeep
@OceanDeep
14 Years1,000+ Posts

Comments: 12 · Posts: 2004 · Topics: 22
Awwww no way! 😢 I'm sorry!! I agree with Moonie, you seem like a really genuine guy and I'm not just saying that to be polite.

If she isnt going to be straight forward with you after being friends long enough then at the end of the day youve seen a side to her you didnt know. I realize shes your friend, and even if she doesnt see you in the same way, if mature enough she would be talking to you about it both because you are her friend, and so that it doesnt put animosity between you.

Hang in there and hopefully we'll see you back on the boards, no need to disappear! 😄