soOoo i'm datin' a cancer.. (Page 2)

krobe.. i don't show
that i need him then thats
a chance for him to think
he as me...and he don't.
i think 2 can play the game...

kel..i've notice that i sometimes
her my mother..but i don't mean
too she's just too sensitive...
but i don't really see the sensitiveness
in the dude i'm talking too

maianm thats how i'm crazy
its kinda hard to go with
the flow if you keep thinking
about if hes being for real or not

SweetestFatale imma take
your word for it...but i always
have the what if in the back of my
head. we been dating for 3 months and
he still complements me all the time
saying all the nice things. what guy
is gonna waste there time...so he
might be foreal...

Lies, there is no doubt he is for real. its just that he will do all sort of crazy things to protect his heart

well honey you better stop that now...if you want to deal with him or any other man for that matter. Men are unpredictable...ppl are unoredictable until you get to know them, and then they will still surprise you.

You just have to enroll in th class I just started called the "live your life and let everything else go with the flow class". LOL. I know its hard for worry warts to change their ways. But we as woman have to..or else these idiot men will drive us INSANE!

oh for sure imma take
that class maybe it
would make my life a little
easier hahah but thanks for
all the advice you and opinions

Lies,

Yeah, just remain uncapturable. LMOA! The more he trys 2 figure out Y in the hell his manipulative tactics cannot capture U, the quicker he will come out his shell, 2 try 2 capture U, with some of the illest tactics that I have ever seen in my life. Just don't fall into them, and he will stop disappearing alot quicker. MOVE REAL SLOW! Damage his brain cells, I KNOW U can do it, U R a GEM! B the young woman that drives men crazy!

haha of course krobe
i wasn't planning on
giving in..not for a
while...damage his brain
cells hahah

lol krobe, maybe I should be taking that advice too....Im extremely impatient tho, so like the other said, I've had to enroll in the "Slow Your Roll 101"class. Its coming along nicely. I guess I would rather let him know that I'm not going anywhere than play hard to get, because he really isnt playing hard to get he's just moving on his own time. I guess that's because he's more forthcoming in disclosing his ebbs and flows. But it is good to keep in mind that though 1 sign maybe include a million people and compatibility double that amount, any relationship is still based on the individuals.

LOL...yea the slow your roll 101 class is amazing. Since I was not born with patience I ave to be schooled. LOL. But it will all be worth it. But these Cancers are some tricky bastards I swear! LOL

lol Im starting to realize that Mai. The patience is working for me and when he finally comes around I get exactly what I've been waiting for

SF,
If U want 2 keep his arse. I hope he is not coming around for sex. Not going 2 keep a Cancer man dear. It is ALL mental.

Its been a very mental endeavor. We both love reading writing and art a great deal and discuss a lot of psych themes. There is a physical aspect of the relationship now, but like I said we were friends for 6 months before so it's been mostly conversations and hanging out. We have a great repetoire for goofing off and joking with one another, whether its a fiegned argument or one of us teaching the other how to do something. Im a Taurus so I don't jump into physical relationships quickly or casually.

Maybe I wont keep him being so open and honest, but then again he might not have been mine to keep from the beginning. Im not really worried about keeping him mentally guessing as much as I'm interested in stimulating him mentally because I dont feel like he's playing games.

He is NOT playing games with U. But, he wants a bit of a challenge in his life. Trust me. The harder U R 2 capture, the more the disappearing acts will stop.

Lies,

like if they get mad they would
tell you want they want to tell
you but when it comes to the
person that they're arguing with
they don't want to hear it...
& i wonder why that is??

He does not want 2 argue with U. Men don't like arguing with the ones they love. Have U noticed they walk away quicker from arguements then us?

It seems like his disappearing acts are more emotional than anything. He is very emotional and it seems like he wants to share this with me, but he doesn't put his emotions on display. He calls me to say "I'm mad I want to hurt someone, I'm sad I want to cry, I'm upset this is so unfair " or "I was mad, sad, upset, ect" but then quickly gets to how he's going to deal with it or how he has been dealing with it and pops back up when his mood changes. Personally I think he likes the ups and downs of various emotions. I expected him to be more shady or secretive or something (call it "I Was With a Scopio"), but he isn't. I have seen a change in his responsiveness when I stopped milky lickin about him "ignoring me" or calling me back. Maybe he's really coming out of his shell.

krobe

thats true they do
walk away faster..
i kind like fighting
because its something
different its not always
the same i guess that makes
sense

"Maybe I wont keep him being so open and honest, but then again he might not have been mine to keep from the beginning. Im not really worried about keeping him mentally guessing as much as I'm interested in stimulating him mentally because I dont feel like he's playing games."

I like you - you sound exactly like me :0)

Angel I like you too. I definitely plan on keeping him as long as I can Moon. He makes me laugh like there is no tomorrow. He's so silly and relaxed and I LOVE that bout him, in conjunction with his articulate intelligent convo, fine Adonis stature, winning smile, and sensitive passion. I think because he's so stable in who he is and what he will/will not do the manipulation of "back up and he'll persue" wont work. He just responds more to how I word things and assure him that he and his opinion are valuable. He has a good mind to know what is required to keep a friendship and relationship lasting and if that's what he wants that's what he'll do

Do geminis stay faithful dats the question,lol. In general they like stimulus if geminis get bored they look for someone else outsid ethe relationship and go a merry fuckin,lol. NOt generalising some do it because it's fun. BUt cancers are veryyyyyy faithful and loyal until u fuck up, hey if i cuss too much its that lil gemini in me,lol.

Wait a sec u can't cuss in here wat da fuk,lol.

lol BK, so are Cancer guys faithful and loyal without a spoken commitment?

I guess its weird to ask because you dont necessarily have to be faithful to someone you aren't necessarily committed to, but it seems like he wants me to understand that he wants a commitment but doesn't really want to have to ask for it or say that he wants it out loud. He says stuff like "well I'll start coming to see you more and hang out even when your Mom comes by, I dont want this to seem casual" or "you know I'm only talking with you and I've only been with you...I'm not a player". He's jokingly asked me if I would consider marrying him and moving in with him too, while we were still friends lol. I've pretty much concluded that sometimes he jumps to the extreme of a sentiment to test the waters tho. A lot of messages on the forum kinda lead me to believe that Cancers play a lot of games or that they need to be broken of bad habits....any cancerian feedback on that?

i'm faithful
but you really
have to have too
be interesting...
because i sure
can get bored easily

"Cancers need their space. Most people dont understand that. "

that's because you guys soak up other people's emotiuons and energy like a sponge and need to back off for awhile until you get your grounding again...

"so sorry to hear."
Merc - you be nice or I'll take away your pop tarts !

"He just responds more to how I word things and assure him that he and his opinion are valuable. He has a good mind to know what is required to keep a friendship and relationship lasting and if that's what he wants that's what he'll do"

okay - see now this is what I've been saying all along....see? not all men are the same....especially cancer men - they're not like any man you'll ever meet

No tort for you.
don't you think you're being too harsh?
come on, its a message board, don't take away my fo-o-od!!!
*sad puppy eyes*

you deserved that merc

"He's jokingly asked me if I would consider marrying him and moving in with him too,"

he's not joking - I don't know if you consider that good news or bad.... but they say stuff like that in a joking way to see what your reaction will be - and if he wants to hang out with your mom, he's serious - they LOVE moms - oh and cancers don't say ANYTHING without a purpose behind it - if he says he doesn't want it to seem casual - that means it's NOT casual.

I wouldn't worry about her too much moon eyes - as I've said several times she sounds exactly like me - and I'm the most patient person you'll ever meet when it comes to these cancer boys behavior. I'm always the one thinking of a million reasons why you shouldn't automatically assume he's playing games.

lol thanks for adding that they love Moms. Ever since he's met my Mom he's been really nice to her. I thought he was sweet on my Mom for a second lol. The second time they met he was carrying in her bags and boxes from the car trying to make her smile. I love that about him because my Mom is super cool.

ooooooooooohhhhh..... he really likes you - he's going ALL out for mom !

I hope he really likes me because I really like him.

remember - they hate to get attached to someone and then lose them - that goes for you AND you're mom....he wouldn't be so chummy with mom if he wasn't planning on keeping you around....I'm telling you - he's trying to weasel his way into the family ;00
you're so lucky....wish I had one.......

I wouldnt call it luck...like every man and relationship it comes with its own dips and rises. I do feel really lucky though...that he is giving me a chance....because not once but twice I passed him over to get back with an ex that wasnt worth it. And he was really understanding and just said "I know how women are, one day you'll get smart and you'll leave him alone..and I'll be here because I'm going to get my chance one way or the other" and I was SWOONING. I hadnt talked to him in about a month prior to my final breakup with "Old News" (as he referred to my on again off again)...3 days after the breakup he calls me out of the blue and says hes in my part of town can he stop by. I told him that night it was done for good with my ex and he's been around ever since.

yeah like I said - you're lucky. I LOVE cancer men....and they love me too - just not the way I want them to...........

Well birthday twin, just trust that your good thing is coming. You're far too good a person not to get some luck. Luckily you got patience...I dont know if Aries are impatient or if it has something to do with another planet in my chart, but patience for me is a recently hard learned skill.

which planet is aries ? I have an aries moon - damn emotional blow ups....GRRRRR........

oooohhhhh.... I just looked it up - your venus

the part your missing about yourself moon eyes is that you don't just understand.....you actually feel what the people around you are feeling - you take it in or as I sadi "absorb" it - it's a good thing because it makes you incredibly sympathetic, but at the same time it really wears on you....

because I have been studying astrology for more than 15 years and I don't just read about it - I spend a lot of time paying VERY close attention to other people.

because she said as much - she just didn't understand what I meant when I said cancers absord others energy - she didn't get the "empathy" thing

I understand - I often find myself explaining the behavior of cancers to other people - I don't mean here, I mean in my everyday life....and I feel so bad for them......they really are caring people but it just hurts you guys so much to give and give and then have people take advantage of you....... I'm the same way really, I'm nice to EVERYONE - I'd do anything to help someone even someone I hated, but I get taken advantage of and people think I'm weird or something because they're not used to someone who just so genuinely NICE and caring..... but I learned to just be myself and not worry about what other people think because at the end of the day I can feel good about myself because I did what I thought was right - I feel so bad for the cancers I know who can't just feel somfortable with themselves and really take it to heart that some people are just jerks who don't appreciate kindness.... so yeah - I understand.....

I have no idea why Cancers get a bad rap....but I think they might in part...accept it. My Cancer has said a lot he'd rather have people misjudge him and leave him be than get all involved in him. Maybe thats why he's been so receptive to me...everything he's tried to hide or downplay I can see it. I knew from day 1 he was extremely intelligent and kind although he likes to carry himself like a dumb street hoodlum lol. That's his shell, but to me it's always been transparent...no less harder to get into, but trasparent none the less.

I knew he was shy and he denies it ALL the time. I remember when we first met he was pacing and fidgeting and when I asked him if he was nervous he said no! but seemed like he couldnt gather himself all night. And it's weird because he's assertive but still shy/timid sometimes. The closer we got I would look at him a certain way or for a long time and he would scurry away from me, literally, when he could or turn away from me, I don't force him back or mess with him about it I just let him get comfy. I think its the CUTEST thing.

Very, but I dont question it cuz I admire both qualities...especially since I'm the same way. Sometimes I'm assertive and sometimes I've more passive/shy.

lol Im sure there are lots of people out there that understand the Cancer condtradictions

Well I am trying my best. The most important thing that I HAVE learned to do is accept them. I may not understand the contradictions all the time. See, I am a Scorp. We pretty much think in black and white...all or nothing. So contradictions kinda throw us off.

So, even though I do not fully understand them all the time, I have learned to accept and deal with them. 🙂

ewlllllllll a Scorpioooooo *pointing and running* I didnt know you were a Scorp. And Im joking Scopios are lovely...just...opinionated and sometimes set in their ways. Im reading a book that says simply of man and woman that there are some things about one another that we will never understand...so when you cant love them and understand them just love them. 🙂

Aww us Scorps arent that bad....and we are very LOYAL!!! But yea I just have to accept him for who he is, and care for him anyway. LOL

Merc - yea LS, Krobe and I broke it D-O-W-N to her! She should be okay for a while. LOL.