When should you give a cancer space?

I think I've posted something like this before but boy oh boy do will I ever stop posting shit and obsessing over this dude on this website.

today was just really shit and I wanted to talk to to my beloved boyfriend right, because I also consider him my friend and I thought he'd care but. he sent me something after barely not talking for 2 days and I replied but he didn't say anything else so I just asked how he was and He said he was ok and asked how I was and I said "I'm ok idk fhbdbd" we chatted for a bit and that was it but I still felt like something was wrong so I asked how his day was and he said he had work and it was ok and asked how was mine was and I said I had a bad day and all he said was "sndjndjs". I thought he was upset or maybe mad at me because he was being blunt so I just asked if he was mad and he said he was mad at something he was doing from uni and that was it 🙂

I'm trying not to be cold and show him that I care and I'm always checking in on him, cos when I'm not ok I just don't talk to anyone and disappear and people have always told me it makes them feel like I forgot about them or that I don't care so yeah. He doesn't ask about me or checks in on me like I often do and I feel like he doesn't care about me at all which just hurts. Would not saying anything anymore and leaving him alone be a good idea? because I just feel stupid and I'm tired of this

When should you give a cancer space? Preferably after chemo.

Posted by RemixGeneralFishy
When should you give a cancer space? Preferably after chemo.

why do I still use this website

As a cancer I can say that whenever I start pulling away you should let me be. I'll come and get you when I wanna talk, but if you keep persisting when I'm pulling away I get annoyed and might not want you in my life at all. It sounds like this dude is busy and you might be getting on his nerves a bit.

If they ask for space, or seem distant, leave them be. They will reach back out to you when they want to. Reference? 1 of my best buds is a Cancer, and if he wants to see a girl, he'll reach out.

Posted by CrabbyPrincess
As a cancer I can say that whenever I start pulling away you should let me be. I'll come and get you when I wanna talk, but if you keep persisting when I'm pulling away I get annoyed and might not want you in my life at all. It sounds like this dude is busy and you might be getting on his nerves a bit.

Yeah that's what I thought.

I just get confused because he randomly sends me a sc? And I thought it was a "wanna talk but didn't know what to say" so i'll just reply and try to talk, because we're dating? I wanna know if he's okay? but guess that's not ok to do haha I just know now that i'll keep being quiet and minding my own business because he managed to get on my nerves

Posted by earlorg16
If they ask for space, or seem distant, leave them be. They will reach back out to you when they want to. Reference? 1 of my best buds is a Cancer, and if he wants to see a girl, he'll reach out.

Yeah I asked my friend who's a cancer too and they told me they do that when they want attention and I genuinely thought he wanted to talk or something but apparently I was wrong again lol.

Posted by Capri-sun
When they ask for it...which is never

Well he doesn't talk ever anyway so it's hard to tell and also because I can't fucking read minds

Posted by Lovely20

Posted by CrabbyPrincess
As a cancer I can say that whenever I start pulling away you should let me be. I'll come and get you when I wanna talk, but if you keep persisting when I'm pulling away I get annoyed and might not want you in my life at all. It sounds like this dude is busy and you might be getting on his nerves a bit.

Yeah that's what I thought.

I just get confused because he randomly sends me a sc? And I thought it was a "wanna talk but didn't know what to say" so i'll just reply and try to talk, because we're dating? I wanna know if he's okay? but guess that's not ok to do haha I just know now that i'll keep being quiet and minding my own business because he managed to get on my nerves

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Ya'll are dating? Hmm. Maybe you should just be blunt with him and be like "Yo, I'd like to talk to ya here and there but I always feel like you're being kind of distant. Let me know whats up so I can stop wasting my time and energy" See how he responds.

Posted by CrabbyPrincess

Posted by Lovely20

Posted by CrabbyPrincess
As a cancer I can say that whenever I start pulling away you should let me be. I'll come and get you when I wanna talk, but if you keep persisting when I'm pulling away I get annoyed and might not want you in my life at all. It sounds like this dude is busy and you might be getting on his nerves a bit.

Yeah that's what I thought.

I just get confused because he randomly sends me a sc? And I thought it was a "wanna talk but didn't know what to say" so i'll just reply and try to talk, because we're dating? I wanna know if he's okay? but guess that's not ok to do haha I just know now that i'll keep being quiet and minding my own business because he managed to get on my nerves

Ya'll are dating? Hmm. Maybe you should just be blunt with him and be like "Yo, I'd like to talk to ya here and there but I always feel like you're being kind of distant. Let me know whats up so I can stop wasting my time and energy" See how he responds.

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True hahaha and yeah we've been together for 2 months lmao

I feel childish and like I'm overrreacting but what the fuck I don't even know anymore I'm tired

Posted by Capri-sun

Posted by Lovely20

Posted by Capri-sun
When they ask for it...which is never

Well he doesn't talk ever anyway so it's hard to tell and also because I can't fucking read minds

Any cancer guy I know is always in my face so to me they are straightforward in their interest and whether they want space or not. I find them overbearing for my personal preference. Could be the opposite sign thing going on though.

I understand not being a mind reader and how that can get frustrating for you.

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Yeah I don't know what's his deal, maybe it's his Scorpio moon?? I thought I would be the detached, distant and aloof one so I might've been reading the wrong astrology shit and we changed roles who knows

When they show signs of frustration and annoyance. They aren't really hard to maintain, because their mood seems to fluctuate daily, maybe even hourly. I feel with all water signs you just ride the waves and try not too force extra emotional friction on them. Though it may not seem at times, Cancer suns actually have full control over themselves. Its when others try to force more emotional friction or opinions on them they get super defensive and annoyed.

Posted by Soul
When they show signs of frustration and annoyance. They aren't really hard to maintain, because their mood seems to fluctuate daily, maybe even hourly. I feel with all water signs you just ride the waves and try not too force extra emotional friction on them. Though it may not seem at times, Cancer suns actually have full control over themselves. Its when others try to force more emotional friction or opinions on them they get super defensive and annoyed.

I'm really fucking annoyed

Lovely20, when someone does that, all they care is about themselves. So when he is ready, are you supposed to drop everything and be back with them? What if you now want space to figure them out? No no, do not do that, they will be upset. Learnt the hard way, my friend is too high maintenance for me!

Posted by Starry22
Lovely20, when someone does that, all they care is about themselves. So when he is ready, are you supposed to drop everything and be back with them? What if you now want space to figure them out? No no, do not do that, they will be upset. Learnt the hard way, my friend is too high maintenance for me!

Yeah I know, all my friends are like that. Even though I want some space I still try to be responsive and give attention. Shouldn't expect anything from anyone but was hoping as my boyfriend he would care more

Dont worry, he will come up with the most brilliant excuses when he's ready, until you will start beating yourself up to give him another chance, just one more. And the cycle will continue. Dont pin your hopes on him, as a boyfriend he should care more, and yes he does, but only for himself and his feelings!

Yeah, I agree with everyone saying that he's being selfish. If you're in a relationship you make an effort to give your special someone time and care. I'm a cancer and I want to see and talk to my boyfriend everyday! Theres no way that I would ignore him if he were trying to talk to me!

Only from my own experience here with my Cancer ex.

When they want space, they will let you know because you feel them pulling away. When they want space, just let them know that you are there whenever they want to come back and they will come back if / when they want to. Sometimes you can "laugh" them out of their crabby shell a little, like with a funny picture of sending them a text of a song or something but generally speaking it is better to leave them to the space they need.

If they like you a lot, they will be thinking about you, even if they are not speaking to you, and that space kind of makes them come back more loving than before. My crab used to send me a love song or something and then he's say he'd been wanting to send it to me for a week but hadn't. Why? I don't know...I think they have this insecurity and they kind of want to love you / express it but they hold back deliberately sometimes.

They need a lot of reassurance, so just be direct and really vulnerable to them. If they REALLY like you, like a lot, then they will be so insecure that they will almost create stuff in their head to push you away. They take FOREVER to realise you like them back so don't play hard to get and let your pride go.

When they take space, they sometimes do it because they are upset. Maybe with you, or maybe just upset. If that's the case, pushing them can blow up in your face because they kind of hate confrontation and arguing and they don't want to be angry at you or say bad stuff to you, but if you push them when they are in their shell they can lash out verbally and be quite cruel.

If you just leave them, they will miss you and come back, and when they do just be kind and patient because being mad at them for disappearing hurts them. Hard to explain but it's kind of like they hate hurting you, and easily feel responsible or criticized so you kind of have to treat them gently.

They might seem cold or aloof but they are really not. I also think they are quick to like you / form an initial attraction to you BUT the moment they feel they are going to fall in love with you or commit to a relationship they can panic - because most cancers feel or want love "forever" and they are afraid of failure and can be very melancholic and easily bruised.

That said, don't let them walk all over you, because they can also be quite manipulative and moody and you have to hold your own without criticising. Being really direct but gentle works best. If the person is going to be your boyfriend - Cancer or not, then they have to step up to the plate and speak every day and reply to your message etc. and if they don't / can't / won't offer that consistency and commitment then they are best to walk away from.

Mondaymorning, very well phrased. It can be taxing to the people outside the shell. Initially it appears enduring, but with passage of time resentment builds, especially if its a regular occurence. Finally, the "outsider" just does not understand somebody who desires to be understood without explanation, and decides to walk away.

Cancers are either 100% in and you'd know it for a fact. Or they might keep you around for rainy days, but won't promise you any type of commitment.

Bottomline is, sign or no sign (I don't want to sound like those typical Yahoo user d-bags) but if a man doesn't consistently ask you about how was your day or most importantly, how you feel then it's really best for you to give space or just simply cut ties. It's immature and it mentally destroys someone if you know the person that really likes you is more concerned about you than you are, what he's doing is not okay. He needs to quit the bull and be straightforward and tell you what's up.

That's what I had to deal with this Cancer guy that I thought things would be something but of course, miscommunication. Don't baby someone that doesn't give a crap about how you feel, let him go.

Honestly, in my opinion, I feel you should ask him to talk to you in person or if you feel texting him is much safer than you can do that, however....please oh please don't be ashamed about confessing on how you feel based on his actions. Don't sugarcoat and I wish for you all the best love!