aquapiscescusp
@aquapiscescusp
13 Years10,000+ Posts
Comments: 33 · Posts: 13769 · Topics: 154
Totally ^
How do I deal with my Cap being a Mama's boy?? (Page 2)
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Totally ^
So are u guys saying I shouldn't move in with him until we're married? I just Dont understand y everyone is so mad at me? 😢
Posted by aries87
So are u guys saying I shouldn't move in with him until we're married? I just Dont understand y everyone is so mad at me? 😢
Personally, I think they are going a little hard on you.
Don't worry about it too much.
I think Caps mom is the problem. I've seen crazy moms drive wedges before, and they always play the "Who? Me?" act.
I'm sure you aren't an angel, but I can't find much fault in your position.
That mom decorating the house thing still has me fired up. LOL
I agree with you True, marriage before sharing/buying property together is smart.
Aries you don't have to ask him again if you don't wan to rock the boat, the alternative is check public records, you can go to your local county office/The Register of Deeds Office and pull the deed on the house.
At the end of the day no matter whose name is on the deed you know for sure your name will not be on the deed therefore you don't have any legal standing even if you contribute money towards the rent etc therefore if something where to go wrong you'd be shit out of luck, this much you can count on.
Whether he lied or not I don't think it matters to you least not enough to leave him, you don't really appear willing to not be with him despite it all. I don't feel you're prepared to do anything. If he truly lied not much you can do about it but accept it and stay with your man or leave.
Learn to love mom, prepare yourself as much as you can and hope for the best.
Aries you don't have to ask him again if you don't wan to rock the boat, the alternative is check public records, you can go to your local county office/The Register of Deeds Office and pull the deed on the house.
At the end of the day no matter whose name is on the deed you know for sure your name will not be on the deed therefore you don't have any legal standing even if you contribute money towards the rent etc therefore if something where to go wrong you'd be shit out of luck, this much you can count on.
Whether he lied or not I don't think it matters to you least not enough to leave him, you don't really appear willing to not be with him despite it all. I don't feel you're prepared to do anything. If he truly lied not much you can do about it but accept it and stay with your man or leave.
Learn to love mom, prepare yourself as much as you can and hope for the best.
TwirlingStrawberry: I am not being manipulative...I haven't ever told him what to do or tried to get him to do what I want if he doesn't want to. I'm a firm believer in just letting a man do pretty much whatever he wants because if u try to control someone, it just pushes them further away.
I know I'm not an angel or perfect but I never said I was. I even said before I wanted your guys opinion because i wanted to make sure I wasn't being a drama queen. I'm not normally dramatic but it's easy to get worked up over something when it involves people you care about so much. That's why I came to u guys...to get an honest opinion.
Posted by aries87
I know I'm not an angel or perfect but I never said I was. I even said before I wanted your guys opinion because i wanted to make sure I wasn't being a drama queen. I'm not normally dramatic but it's easy to get worked up over something when it involves people you care about so much. That's why I came to u guys...to get an honest opinion.
I think Cap mom is trying to freeze you out, and she's manipulating her son to accomplish the goal.
That's what I think.
Posted by TwirlingStrawberryPosted by CapTennPosted by aries87
I know I'm not an angel or perfect but I never said I was. I even said before I wanted your guys opinion because i wanted to make sure I wasn't being a drama queen. I'm not normally dramatic but it's easy to get worked up over something when it involves people you care about so much. That's why I came to u guys...to get an honest opinion.
I think Cap mom is trying to freeze you out, and she's manipulating her son to accomplish the goal.
That's what I think.
I think she's protecting her son.click to expand
How old is the son?
Posted by TwirlingStrawberry
does it even matter how old he is?
purchasing a home is a big fucking deal whether you are 18 or 50.
Yes, it matters.
If he is a grown man, momma needs to step aside.
Posted by TwirlingStrawberry
....and I think the entire "decorating" crap was made up or exaggerated.
Why in the hell would someone make that up?
Posted by TwirlingStrawberry
don't you think that if she had any kind of relationship with the mother at all that she'd hear all details straight from the horse's mouth?
I didn't know she was responsible for having a relationship with mom, I thought she was dating -- and had baby by the son.
If the mom is a bitch, she has no obligation to kiss her ass.
Posted by TwirlingStrawberry
yeah....the mom is a real bitch....helping her son buy a home for his family.
TOTAL BITCH!
If she's doing it to maintain control and self serving purposes --- Yep, a total bitch.
The thing is, you don't know which it is -- and neither do I.
You are thinking too much, and drawing conclusions based on "what you think".
Only the facts matter. I trying to give the girl the benefit of the doubt, which is you can do if you don't know the facts.
At the very least, a little more gentle with your opinions. You seem very forceful, as if you know these people. I assume you don't.
Posted by TwirlingStrawberry
So, all moms out there.....you should totally put the name of whomever your son is dating on his title deed or you are a complete bitch if you don't.
hell.....co-sign a car for her too while you are at it!
Wow.
You go off the rails rather easily.
No one has suggested any such absurd thing.
How was I not honest w u guys? I Dont think my being a stripper affects this current situation. He asked me to stop so I did. I have a full time job now with great benefits and AM financially stable. If I didn't have extra money around to put on a down payment, I wouldn't expect him to ask me or put my name on it. If I had no money it would be a completely different situation and I wouldn't even be confused. I would then know why he didn't ask me. I know I was a stripper but that doesn't mean I am unstable.
Also, his mother doesn't even know I was a stripper when we first met unless my cap told her and lied about that too. (He said he never told her because he didn't want her to know).
We have come a long way since my daughter was born. In the past 14 Mo. He has become a different man. We were going thru a rough patch but now things r totally different in a good way. If I didn't know for a fact he loves me very much, I'd have my answer right there and know that was the reason he didn't wanna put my name on it.
Also, I Dont know what r u meaning when u say it was unnerving I got pregnant after 6 months. It takes two people to have a baby as I'm sure you know from being a mother of two. It's not like I lied to him and tried to get pregnant on purpose if that's what u r implying.
Also, his mother doesn't even know I was a stripper when we first met unless my cap told her and lied about that too. (He said he never told her because he didn't want her to know).
We have come a long way since my daughter was born. In the past 14 Mo. He has become a different man. We were going thru a rough patch but now things r totally different in a good way. If I didn't know for a fact he loves me very much, I'd have my answer right there and know that was the reason he didn't wanna put my name on it.
Also, I Dont know what r u meaning when u say it was unnerving I got pregnant after 6 months. It takes two people to have a baby as I'm sure you know from being a mother of two. It's not like I lied to him and tried to get pregnant on purpose if that's what u r implying.
Cap Tenn: My cap is 30 years old.
TwirlingStrawberry: I AM able to contribute money...I am NOT asking for a free handout. I did NOT make up or exaggerate that his mother wants to decorate the entire house. She even showed me pics of what she wants to do. I know you dont know me, but if you Dont believe my story, why even comment? I came here for some honest advice so why would I waste my time lying to people who don't even know me? Please just stop commenting if you Dont me anyways. Thank you.
TwirlingStrawberry: I AM able to contribute money...I am NOT asking for a free handout. I did NOT make up or exaggerate that his mother wants to decorate the entire house. She even showed me pics of what she wants to do. I know you dont know me, but if you Dont believe my story, why even comment? I came here for some honest advice so why would I waste my time lying to people who don't even know me? Please just stop commenting if you Dont me anyways. Thank you.
I think there is some miscommunication here or misunderstanding. Idk how many times I have to say it but he wouldn't need his mom or aunts help if my name was on the house because I'd b able to give him exactly the same amount they are! It's not like he's buying a mansion and needs a million dollars lol. I have the money to put on a down payment and a steady, full time job so that i know i would b able to keep making future payments.
This conversation is getting a bit rediculous. I came here for some honest advice from people who believed I was honest with my story.....not to have to defend myself. I've already said I'm going to talk to him about so that's just what I'll do.
Thank you to those who have given me advice and allowed me to see it from different perspectives. 🙂
This conversation is getting a bit rediculous. I came here for some honest advice from people who believed I was honest with my story.....not to have to defend myself. I've already said I'm going to talk to him about so that's just what I'll do.
Thank you to those who have given me advice and allowed me to see it from different perspectives. 🙂
Has anything ACTUALLY been signed or payed yet?
Posted by TwirlingStrawberry
2. Wait until neither of you need help and then buy a house together.
offer that ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^ to your cap and you'll know exactly where you stand.
click to expand
+1
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