do libra girls hold a grudge?

so, last week i f*cked up big time with my (libra) girl. i tried to apologize, but it doesn't seem to work, i guess i hurt her very much by not trusting her...

any hope left for me? or should i give up?

wats ur sign??

u mean u r a libra man who had some issues with a libra girl?

yeah, i'm a libra, too.

No grudge - but wait a few days until she's sorted her head out.

In actual fact she is not that different from you.

yeah, well, it was about a week ago... she doesn't talk to me right now (although she hasn't kicked me off her icq list yet)...
so i just just wait?

oops, i meant "so i should just wait?"

How would you play it if you got hurt? That's what she'll do being a Libra as well.

well, she said she don't love me anymore... i dunno, i wouldn't say that, even if i was hurt badly.

oh well, thanks guys. guess i just have to sit this one one out and wait.

What did you do?

If you truly break my trust, I will stop loving you and wanting you. I don't hold a grudge but I won't want much to do with you. My mind will just click off and I will wonder what I ever saw in you.

@ litte_sparrow

yeah, that sounds like her... shit.

what i did? well, she spent the last few days and nights with a female friend and some dude they just met, didn't have time to talk to me etc., and since my past relationships ended in similar ways, i got paranoid and kinda overreacted.

"Kinda overreacted" could mean a lot of things. You screwed up, man. The only time I've seen my Libra Girl absolutely livid was one she told me a little about her ex's. Either wait a very long time or go on. Too bad.

kinda overreacted = "Let's break this off before it gets melodramatic."
i never ever in my whole life regretted something 2 seconds after i said it - until then.

three questions

Why the F would you do that?

How long were you together?

How old is everybody?

1. because i'm stupid. but seriously, since my fiancee left me for her boss half a year ago (you may crack secretary jokes at your heart's content now), i've never been the same.

2. two months or so

3. i'm 27, i'd raher not disclose her age (would be illegal in the US, but is legal here in Germany. No, I'm normally not a cradle robbing pervert, I simply don't care about age that much.)

At 2 months, it wasn't a serious relationship.

Don't worry about it. Move on.

He is trying to understand where she is comming from.

When you said you two should just end things and just move on that was very passive agressive, and libras of both sexes see through that instantly.

Her reaction in her mind was probably "now that is a bit ironic, this guys doesn't even see what he just said, and if he doesn't see it, I can't really help him." But probably on a little bit meaner terms.

Of the two, Libra guys seem to care a bit more of what other people think that Libra women do, you would have stepped up and saw it is a problem with a solution if it was the other way around and wanted to explore it, she doesn't really. She saw instantly that you were taking your insecurities out on her, in an attacking manner and you and I and everyone else on this board knows that you don't get away with attacking a libra. Period. However much you think you can hurt them they can hurt you more. The guys do it up front and to your face if they really feal threatened or attacked the women do what she is doing, show you by removing themselves and forcing you to deal with it on their own. She likely sees it this way: Your insecurities are your problem, your responsibility and not hers, if you can't handle them no one can handle them for you and shell be dammed if you try to make her.

The only solution here, is not an emotional solution. She is not going to care how much you have realized you "feel" for her, she's a libra, she is going to care for what you "think" since this has happened. There is an objective problem, your insecurity with women leaving you for other guys, the solution is equally objective, you realizing this correcting your behavior and communicating to her that you understand this is the case and she did nothing wrong in the situation and you appologize for putting your emotional baggage on her.


That is pretty much it. You have to show her you realize what the objective problem was. don't go to her with "I love you" or "I feel a connection I have never felt before" or any other emotional stuff. It's not about that, it is about the problem and the problem only.

Good post Nic however, if he is this insecure at two months ... it isn't going to work. Plus she is still young and has a lot of growing up to do. She will change a hundred times by the time she is 20.

"Plus she is still young and has a lot of growing up to do. She will change a hundred times by the time she is 20."

Good point. Not all signs are like this but Libras always are, who they were growing up and who they were by the time they are grown up are two different people, and there are a lot of variations in between and for them to actually grow up they need the space and freedom to explore this on my own.

Libras are the steryotipical young bad boys/girls with a chip on their shoulder and a distain for authority who disect the world they live in inside their minds and walk out the sucessful business people and family men/women. They have to go through these transitions, us being the signs who create who they are themselves...nothing is left up to circumstance.

Odds are if they mended their relationship and got back together he would be thrown through the emotional ringer with this girl whos motto at her age is "I'm gonna do what Iv'e got to do." regardless of weather he is on board or not.

16 or 17 yr libra will be mature enough but still she lives in a confused stage bcoz of the complex society around her. She will take some time to bring herself out of society byt comprehending every thing happens around her. So she will be always changing like nic mentioned... ready for that ride??... and its safe to give her a few days time like libra mentioned.

I haven't yet understood the societies laws related to age. Words legal or illegal doesn't make any difference for me from what I feel and think. If I happen to fall in love with a 14 year old it means I am love with a 14 year old. Socially illegal may be, but who cares.

"If you truly break my trust, I will stop loving you and wanting you. I don't hold a grudge but I won't want much to do with you. My mind will just click off and I will wonder what I ever saw in you."

Yup, thats definately what I'd do. But if you were to get in my face to purposely push my buttons, I'll stoop so low to hurt you the worst way I can hopefully so you'll never forget the pain I've caused. I like my revenge. I do hold grudges if you break my trust twice. "Fool me once, shame on me. Fool me twice, shame on you."

thanks for all the answers guys.

little sparrow, not worrying about it is easier said than done.

nicodemus, what you wrote really makes sense, though i dunno if i can communicate it to her. she's more stubborn than me and that's quite an impressive feat.
also, i can take emotioanl turmoil just fine, the only thing i can't take is when i have the feeling that a girl is dishonest towards me... which led to the current problem.

thelibran, yeah that's pretty much my train of thought... if it makes "click" i don't really care if the girl is 14, 24 or 54.

Libras can be incredibly stubborn. We dig in and won't be pushed around.

As for the age thing, I think it does matter because people change so much over the course of their lives. Who I was three years ago is not who I am now. I want different things, different people, etc. and I am in my early thirties! Someone in their teens who has an entire life to explore will change so much. If you try to stop their development, they will eventually resent you. (At least, this has been my experience.) The only time I have ever seen teenagers stay together into their thirties was when they were close to the same age when they met and went through that exploring together.

Libras are also the masters of reinvention. An added, unexpected complication.

When it comes to her love a libra woman is willing to accept everything. She rarely holds grudges actually most Librans i know never hold grudges. She's mad. Grudges are something you would have had to worry about with a Cancer.