Libra Intimacy

So Libra Girl came over last night and enjoyed dinner and wine. I had two movies to choose from for us to watch but we both decided just to visit instead. So we sat on the couch and while we were talking, I was rubbing her feet and legs and holding her hands and she didn't seem to mind at all; no indication of pulling away at all, seemed perfectly comfortble.

Is this what you would consider intimacy? I kiss on the cheek; she hasn't kissed me yet; she grabs my arm once in awhile; but I always instigate the hugs (except for one time I remember) and holding hands.

I told her, "I like touching you because I feel more connected to you." She didn't say anything then but seemed pleased.

What do you think?

Atom, slowly does it with that one I think but yes, that's very sweet 🙂

You shoulda gone with the Leo though LOL (just kidding)....she would have devoured you by now *laffs*

Nah, sounds like things are going well 🙂 Keep up the good work - you are very patient and she'll like that a LOT

You know ... I really don't like this girl. She is WAY too precious for me.

Personally, there is no way I would go eight months without kissing, holding hands, etc. The only time I have ever been like the way you were describing was when I was really heart broken and an Aries wouldn't leave me alone. I was never really into him but I didn't have the heart to fight him off.

I really think you might be beating a dead horse. I would say she is leading you on but she has told you she isn't interested in you. Perhaps you are leading yourself on.

Sorry Atom. I hope I am wrong.

OMG I didn't know it was 8 months!! sorry Atom, I do agree with LS....go the Leo I say 🙂 LOL

Ummmm...yeah I will go now I think!!!

It is either eight or six months. I am pretty sure eight.

She sounds young like she doesn't know how to say No.

Yes, but she is instigating some of it. She calls him (infrequently, but still does). I believe she invited him to her house for dinner. If she truly isn't interested, I would call that "her leading him on"...

How to respond? First, Leos don't devour me----we just thoroughly enjoy each other (talking of a former relationship); Aquarius girl is getting very friendly, but too new to pursue heavily. Libra Girl, I think, has gone from a Just Friends mind set from a few months back to sharing EVERYTHING and not saying, "No," and being as affection as I've ever seen her. And I'm nutz about her. Maybe, little sparrow, she doesn't know how to say "No"----that would be sad to me. IF that's the case, I'll have to accept it and look elsewhere---but prefer to give it time until I know that I know. Does that make sense? AND does the type of evening I told you about indicate intimicy or taking advantage or I'm being a silly dreamer—

LS might be right about her being unable to say no but Atom is seeing the situation clearly, obviously your smart enough to take things as they are and not be led on. Otherwise this would be a bad situation.

You seem fully aware of whats going on and are simply choosing to keep persuing so I think everything is fine. If anything worries me about this it is that I can see the possibility that she doesn't want anything more than to take advantage of your gentlemanly niceness and charm selfishly without any intention on it going farther than it is now.

If a guy wants to rub my legs and back etc., without the expectation of sex while we happily chat about our lives, and I consider him a friend, I would have NO problem with it. Hell, some of my female friends do things like this for me, and I have never given it another thought.

If I know he is more into me than I am into him, I wouldn't let it happen and would disappear for awhile.

Do you have a date with her tomorrow Atom?

Atom you little playboy!!!! you have 3— gawd 😉

If you're dead set on the Libra girl and you're happy to take it slow then by all means keep going....you seem happy to continue so why rock the boat?? As long as you're enjoying yourself - that's the main thing 🙂 🙂 🙂

Libra Girl is definitely happy to be there but does not know what to do next other than be nice, present and appreciative of all your actions.

She does not want to impose and will not put herself out there verbally. Because she does not know what conclusion to draw from how you are with her e.g. does he have feelings for me or not? Does he do this with everyone because if he really wanted me, and me alone, he would show me. This seems to go against what I have written about before e.g. you cannot tell her until she has shown you, but she might feel that she has already shown you...!!

Think back to last night and see if there were actions on her part that could be considered 'showing him that I like him'.

you should have kissed her hehehe!!!if i dont like someone i never would let him touch me...maybe its me maybe some other libras r just like me...i dont know!!!usually i dont say no but if i didnt like you i would show you.bad english hehe
atom you r in a good way but u r too emotional...i would prefer more agressive and difficul aries!!!!

I appreciate all of you! My gosh! These perspectives are intriguing. Knowing nicodemus from other posts, I feel he has accessed the situation correctly---I'm not going into this blind and I enjoy being able to continue to ask Libras who KNOW Libras what they think.

I am also thankful for Libra's wisdom---strong and helpful all the way. Libra, I feel I have been as up front as I can be without scaring her. She HAS seen me in social situations and work situations and KNOWS I do NOT focus attention on other women like I am doing with her. If I REALLY wanted her? Huh? You mean giving of time, flowers, desserts, fun e-mails, dinners, events, etc., isn't showing I really want her? Like some of the other posters have mentioned, if someone rubbed my feet or legs and held hands and I wasn't into her, I'd BOLT. I'd be out of there in a shot! I really DON'T have friends of either sex that do that! It's ONLY when I want to be intimate with someone that the touching comes out.

libraff, you may be right. I may be too emotional. Ha! And to be a brusque Aries in these circumstances, I think would come off crude---my opinion.

YES, we are getting together today. I bought her two *wow, elegant✨ throw pillows and an O'range / Cocoa bar and a beautiful card I think she'll like.

And, yes, Chatz, I usually have no shortage of women to show interest in---including two or three that would love for me to drop everything and pursue them to the ends of the earth. It is pretty nice. Yes, I have wonderful women in my life who are just friends too. Libra Girl adds different perspective and a unique emotional anchor to me. And she is stunningly gorgeous---which I think has kept her from relationships, other guys having a difficult time getting past that to really know her. And SHE is awesome---no matter what she looked like! Okay, enough mush for now. Await your responses!

Well, I am a pretty affectionate cuddly sort of person so I have no problem touching people, hugging them, etc. If I KNOW that they are more into me than they should be, I pull back on all levels and disappear. It is very noticeable.

I think it is in the BIG sexology book that talks about how Libra women because a symbol and people stop seeing her as a person. I have found this to be very true in my life. Although I know my partners inside and out, they generally know nothing about me and who I am. It is never intentional.

"Well, I am a pretty affectionate cuddly sort of person so I have no problem touching people, hugging them, etc."

LS is Oct 11, I am Oct 10 - I'm probably the least affectionate person you'll ever meet. Only kisses as greetings. But never as part of a conversation will I touch your arm etc. Unless I'm tiddled then this is changes :-)

Just to throw this into the equation e.g. don't read into the affectionate or affectionless behaviour. It may mean nothing.

Tom, don't forget that she measures you by her own standards and through her own rationale. You need to look at her baviour NOT at how she reads yours. Shy people (sorry for calling Libra Girl shy) will argue in their minds towards the negative.

Her actions sound like love to me - but that does not mean that she will leave the comfortable cage. Some people will choose to let things pass them by BECAUSE they don't have the emotional courage to make themselves vulnerable. I for one will let things pass me by if it might bring my reputation down [sic!].

It's going to have to come from you...

Atom, I say go for it. You seem clear. Just take it slow and see where it leads. Just don't put all your feelings in it just yet. Oh, how could you 3 lasses.... You go boyeee!!!

Thank you, my dears. I am going to add a new post soon.

QS, Interesting situation on Valentine's Day when I ran into Aquarius Girl with Libra Girl at my side. Aquarius Girl took me aside and invited me to an event with her next weekend. With Libra Girl's aloofness, I am tempted, must say. . .

I think that was good for Libra girl to see. Now she knows that you are desired by others and she will get a little unbalanced if she really does like you. She will probably make a comment about that soon.

So, did you accept the aqua girl's invite? How old are you Atom?

Yes, going w/ Aqua Girl---it's during a time Libra Girl is unavailable any way. Meanwhile, the phone rang a few times on Valentine's Day w/ Libra Girl around---a call from a horny Virgo PYT was partially overheard. How old am I? Er, over 21.

How far over—

QS, You crack me up. Yes, we would be age compatible. . .

Hmmmm, where do you live— Don't get all shy now.

Sorry, QS, no more fishing for now, okay?

We're in a different time zone, QS. You would get my hopes too far up. Then there's always that crush you have on nic' that you'd have to overcome. *sigh*

Tom

Think your girl wants to stay in full control over what happens to HER. That's more important than winning you, at least at the moment but this is something she longs to break through. I do think that you are in a special zone. Because of the effort that she's put into it - who bakes a cake? Takes a couple of hours and at least you need happy thoughts while baking it.

I think a first reaction (if perhaps you have relationship issues) can be to say No, when getting kissed. Then you beat yourself up afterwards. You feel limited by your own thoughts.

Also think that if she contacts you now it is a Yes - BUT THAT STILL DOES NOT MEAN SHE WILL PUT HERSELF OUTTHERE. Because we would not put ourselves outthere and put your hopes up if I did not want you there. Too much hassle.

It's all in her head, of course...

I've gone and have put guys through hoops because I did not know what to do...

Thank you, Libra.

Please be OK, Tom.

Atom, find a scorp and soon you will be saying "Libra who—?"

Thanks, Libra, I'll be okay. I SHOULD be a Leo since, like a cat, I tend to land on my feet. I think it actually confuses young women when I AM okay after they're gone.

Yes, QS, I KNOW Scorpios VERY well---that intriguing darkness and all consuming YKW drive can take ANY male's mind off ANY of the other signs!

Tom

I'm sorry that you're giving up on your girl and that you are mentally moving on.

How might she be feeling right now after what happened last night? Do you not wonder?

Libra, you are SO sweet. I am a persevering kind of guy. MOST of my friends I've had for 10-15 years! No matter what they've said or done, etc. I'm not sure how to find out how Libra Girl is feeling about what happened last night. YES, I wonder! Soooo, do I call / write / wait— THAT's why Libras are frustrating to some of us other signs. EVEN IF I attempted to find out, IS she going to be straight forward with me? (See what I mean?). I will never stop adoring this woman----would just like clear signals. And heeding others' advice seems to lead to only one conclusion. UNLESS she made a clear romantic attempt, I have to accept she's just not interested in me that way or has emotional damage I can't fix / she chooses not to fix. I don't know if I'm making myself clear---because it is still sad to me.

Yes, I understand. Maybe I'm too stubborn in the giving-up department. When she calls you though don't call her on any of the above. Then pretend nothing happened.

Over & out

I don't want to give up on her. I am VERY good about pretending nothing happened---because I want her to be genuine with me. One reason I feel it wise to await her call is because I feel too tired to contact her right now.

OK, Atom, all that talk about being nutz about me... 🙂 Tryin to give you a chance, but "no more fishing" cool. **** feelings hurt****😢

QS, you're adored. No need for hurt feelings, okay?

"I SHOULD be a Leo since, like a cat, I tend to land on my feet. I think it actually confuses young women when I AM okay after they're gone."

I think this is more of a trait in guys that are comfortable with themselves and have a selfless approach to relationships than anything. I am the same way. I have actually had girls get mad at me for not being "upset" when they decided to end things. Like I don't care, it's not that I don't care, I don't want someone who isn't sure they want to be with me, so if your not then OK...lets move on type of thing. It's the rare cases when I have begun to fall for someone, beyond the courtship that I get upset after they are gone.


"MOST of my friends I've had for 10-15 years! No matter what they've said or done, etc. "

That is awesome, I am the same way and to that extent it is really rare. My best friends I have been friends with over 25 years, and I am only 23. I am the kind of friend that will tell you your Fing up but will back your decision either way. It takes a long time to have that kind of connection with them though. I love to share the good times with them, but I won't let any of them suffer alone either. A lot of people don't get that kind of loyalty.

*over 15 yearss.

Atom. I know...

wow....well I wonder if mine will be upset when I tell him I want more out of r/ship than the once a fortnight hook up this next week....probably not *shrugs*

We'll see...maybe though, it'll make him realise stuff, maybe he'll just let me walk - who knows 😛

Chatz, if any man would just let you walk he's a FOOL (ALL caps, not just a capital "F").

nic', I am honored to be considered having similar traits with you. I believe you are much more articulate and, as a whole, a deeper thinker, but our perspective on life seems the same. You still have all the women in this forum in a twitter than I do, but that's okay. For now. . .

*in a twitter MORE than I do

lol@in a twitter!! I've never heard that one before.

awwwwww and thank you Atom - you sure know how to make a girl blush!! 😛

Got a call from Leo Girl tonight, Chatz. Wanted dinner together. If Libra Girl didn't have such an emotional hold on me right now, would have dropped EVERYTHING to see how the pussy cat is doing. I'm one heckuva faithful guy as I walk this journey with Libra Girl to see how things work out. Not too concerned about losing Cat Woman even if things go sidesways with the Libra because we both know we just have to give "those" signals (Fire signs are instinctive about this) and sparks would fly. We'd hit the bed and not come up for air for DAYS.

Nothing wrong with being faithful....Leo woman would be pretty upset knowing she was only a "distraction" anyway...trust me!! and only YOU know what YOU want so hang in there but remember, be aloof LOL

Chatz, you're getting very good with the two of us bouncing off each other. My particular Leo Girl seems to play the field (UN-faithful with many) until she settles then gives her all or totally faithful. ALOOFNESS definitely turns her on. She has men of all ages coming out of the woodwork BEGGING to see her in a bikini or less. . .meanwhile, she had a minor surgery a few weeks ago and couldn't wait to pull off her clothes to show me the little suture marks. Ah, you Leo Girls. You are divine!

Purrrrrrr!!!

Once settled we do give 100% and nobody can come between that loyalty or watch out~!

Atom,

Man you sure do know how to give a compliment.

Don't kid yourself you have all the girls here looking in your direction on many occasion. I definately appreciate the goading each other into competativeness.