HeavyEntertainmentShow
@HeavyEntertainmentShow
8 Years5,000+ Posts
Comments: 4555 · Posts: 7614 · Topics: 100
Being in love = losing yourself?
You are on page out of 2 | Reverse Order
I'm one of those. My personality doesn't combine with my partner's, but I change.
The thing that scares me the most is not just that loss, but thinking what would happen if or when that person disappears from my life. The best for me is always keeping areas for myself (time, activity, friends) because when it's over I recover fast, the hard part is building yourself again.
Mellow out... don't you like your bitter and rude self?
The thing that scares me the most is not just that loss, but thinking what would happen if or when that person disappears from my life. The best for me is always keeping areas for myself (time, activity, friends) because when it's over I recover fast, the hard part is building yourself again.
Mellow out... don't you like your bitter and rude self?
To a subject - definitely yes!
But not everyone has ability or opportunity to love as deeply to lose themselves.
While they are thinking they are loving someone and doesn't want to be extension of that person - it is 'seems like love' and it can go on forever until death do them part.
However IF they will find that all consuming love - their eyes will get open wide and they will breath out 'is it even possible'?
And only then they will agree on being an extension, doormat, move, die...whatever it requires by love.
I've loved. Kept myself contained and sober.
And I love now exactly to the point of 'I'll bleed for you and you don't have to do the bleeding in return'...it's my decision and you can just be. Your terms. Just tell me what those are so I won't screw up! ?
But not everyone has ability or opportunity to love as deeply to lose themselves.
While they are thinking they are loving someone and doesn't want to be extension of that person - it is 'seems like love' and it can go on forever until death do them part.
However IF they will find that all consuming love - their eyes will get open wide and they will breath out 'is it even possible'?
And only then they will agree on being an extension, doormat, move, die...whatever it requires by love.
I've loved. Kept myself contained and sober.
And I love now exactly to the point of 'I'll bleed for you and you don't have to do the bleeding in return'...it's my decision and you can just be. Your terms. Just tell me what those are so I won't screw up! ?
Posted by breterpanJesus effin Christ, she lives! Last time I talked to you, you wanted my insight on your Fishy boy.....and then you blew me off. Damn flakey Virgins.
I don't think I know one person who has remained the same after getting into a relationship. I know I definitely changed in both of mine, and I'm super aware of it and determined not to fall into that same trap in my next one.
I want whoever it is and I to remain separate people and not "blahblah & blahblahblah," and I am definitely not going to allow myself to only hang out with my boyfriend or feel like I have to take him along every time I go out, and vice versa.
individuality is healthy, becoming extensions of one another is not
Now that we got that outta the way, it all depends on your point of view. Human beings thrive on higher-level cooperation, which is why it's so important to "cooperate" with the right person that brings out the best in you, and vice verca. Giving yourself completely feels natural when it happens and there's no doubts whatsoever. And you both become stronger & better when you're in sync.
When it's right, it's the best. Individuality will only keep you warm upto a point. Otherwise what's the alternative? You can be individualistic all you want, but you're still alone. I'd rather be with the love of my life than be an individual for the rest of my life.
Posted by BlackburnYou say rude, I say honest. Too many people in the world
I'm one of those. My personality doesn't combine with my partner's, but I change.
The thing that scares me the most is not just that loss, but thinking what would happen if or when that person disappears from my life. The best for me is always keeping areas for myself (time, activity, friends) because when it's over I recover fast, the hard part is building yourself again.
Mellow out... don't you like your bitter and rude self?
And I might be bitter upto a point when it comes to my family, but resentment is all it is. I have no feelings for them whatsoever. I just resent those who mistreat me. And the beauty of it is: I can be easily distracted by the beautiful things in life, especially those who keep coming back 😄
I've been on my own plenty, now I'm more than ready to give long-term partnership a solid go. I'm too stubborn to completely lose myself anyway lol. And my Lion-Virgin likes me stubborn.
Posted by GemitatiWhen I think of you, "sober" is never a word that comes to mind.
Kept myself sober.
Posted by HeavyEntertainmentShow? I know...Posted by GemitatiWhen I think of you, "sober" is never a word that comes to mind.
Kept myself sober.
click to expand
However I am!
What's up your ass?
What exactly would change if you moved to another state/city. You're still stuck with yourself.
@HeavyEntertainmentShow
What do you mean Virgin? Lion-Virgin?
And why are you so uptight? I can hardly imagine how can you be 'angry in love'?
Indication of trouble in a Paradise. To me anyway...
What do you mean Virgin? Lion-Virgin?
And why are you so uptight? I can hardly imagine how can you be 'angry in love'?
Indication of trouble in a Paradise. To me anyway...
Of course there is a chance of losing yourself.....you are a Pisces
Posted by enfant_terribleYou saying it like its a bad thing...?
What exactly would change if you moved to another state/city. You're still stuck with yourself.
Posted by MyStarsShineHe is—?
Of course there is aa chance of losing yourself.....you are a Pisces
OMG! I was sure he is something else.
That's xplains a lot! ?
Posted by enfant_terribleExactly. Which is why I'd rather do it with my Lion-Virgin 😄 Fresh start in more ways than one.
What exactly would change if you moved to another state/city. You're still stuck with yourself.
Posted by MyStarsShineI'm also Aries-dominant & Virgo moon and there's
Of course there is a chance of losing yourself.....you are a Pisces
that would ever happen.Posted by GemitatiLion-Virgin = Jed Leo/Virgo cusp, August 23. And trouble with my Lion-Virgin? You must be confusing me with CC. I know how to treat my man good. She only knows how to make them run for the hills, screaming in terror.
@HeavyEntertainmentShow
What do you mean Virgin? Lion-Virgin?
And why are you so uptight? I can hardly imagine how can you be 'angry in love'?
Indication of trouble in a Paradise. To me anyway...
It already has
Yes, u may lose yourself but u won't know for sure until it's happening .. then maybe u can slap yourself in the face in the process of losing yourself, snap out of it & continuing loving your demigod
Posted by HeavyEntertainmentShowLol. But why so angry? Your negative energy is palpable. What's wrong?Posted by GemitatiLion-Virgin = Jed Leo/Virgo cusp, August 23. And trouble with my Lion-Virgin? You must be confusing me with CC. I know how to treat my man good. She only knows how to make them run for the hills, screaming in terror.
@HeavyEntertainmentShow
What do you mean Virgin? Lion-Virgin?
And why are you so uptight? I can hardly imagine how can you be 'angry in love'?
Indication of trouble in a Paradise. To me anyway...click to expand
When you admit to someone having your heart.....you have lost a part of yourself
Been there done that
Scorpio dominant but Sun-Neptune conjunct
Been there done that
Scorpio dominant but Sun-Neptune conjunct
Posted by MyStarsShineIs that why he is screaming? Like if his balls were squized?
It already has
Posted by MyStarsShineScorpio suns with Bull moons aren't the most emotionally/mentally stable of people lol. My Virgin moon keeps it all in check, that's why I'm still alive and not 6 feet under already.
When you admit to someone having your heart.....you have lost a part of yourself
Been there done that
Scorpio dominant but Sun-Neptune conjunct
I'm ruled by my head, not my pe....erm, Venus.
Posted by GemitatiYou say negative, I sayPosted by HeavyEntertainmentShowLol. But why so angry? Your negative energy is palpable. What's wrong?Posted by GemitatiLion-Virgin = Jed Leo/Virgo cusp, August 23. And trouble with my Lion-Virgin? You must be confusing me with CC. I know how to treat my man good. She only knows how to make them run for the hills, screaming in terror.
@HeavyEntertainmentShow
What do you mean Virgin? Lion-Virgin?
And why are you so uptight? I can hardly imagine how can you be 'angry in love'?
Indication of trouble in a Paradise. To me anyway...click to expand
Focused anticipation, preparing a big prank on several people.
Posted by HeavyEntertainmentShowMy moon is extremely mentally stablePosted by MyStarsShineScorpio suns with Bull moons aren't the most emotionally/mentally stable of people lol. My Virgin moon keeps it all in check, that's why I'm still alive and not 6 feet under already.
When you admit to someone having your heart.....you have lost a part of yourself
Been there done that
Scorpio dominant but Sun-Neptune conjunct
click to expand
It was my Pisces influence that wasn't
But this isn't about me.....it's about you
How old is the guy?
Posted by HeavyEntertainmentShowOMG! Are you going to kili somebody?Posted by GemitatiYou say negative, I sayPosted by HeavyEntertainmentShowLol. But why so angry? Your negative energy is palpable. What's wrong?Posted by GemitatiLion-Virgin = Jed Leo/Virgo cusp, August 23. And trouble with my Lion-Virgin? You must be confusing me with CC. I know how to treat my man good. She only knows how to make them run for the hills, screaming in terror.
@HeavyEntertainmentShow
What do you mean Virgin? Lion-Virgin?
And why are you so uptight? I can hardly imagine how can you be 'angry in love'?
Indication of trouble in a Paradise. To me anyway...
Focused anticipation, preparing a big prank on several people.click to expand
'Preparing a big prank on several people' sounds like a mental illness.
You need help!
Get it!
Posted by GemitatiLOLPosted by HeavyEntertainmentShowOMG! Are you going to kili somebody?Posted by GemitatiYou say negative, I sayPosted by HeavyEntertainmentShowLol. But why so angry? Your negative energy is palpable. What's wrong?Posted by GemitatiLion-Virgin = Jed Leo/Virgo cusp, August 23. And trouble with my Lion-Virgin? You must be confusing me with CC. I know how to treat my man good. She only knows how to make them run for the hills, screaming in terror.
@HeavyEntertainmentShow
What do you mean Virgin? Lion-Virgin?
And why are you so uptight? I can hardly imagine how can you be 'angry in love'?
Indication of trouble in a Paradise. To me anyway...
Focused anticipation, preparing a big prank on several people.
'Preparing a big prank on several people' sounds like a mental illness.
You need help!
Get it!click to expand
@HeavyEntertainmentShow
Sorry, but I am under the thought of losing yourself is a precursor to infatuation. Love as I see it doesn't send you into the clouds, instead it keeps you grounded by your own accord. Your judgment is clouded because leaving things behind is not the way you should be looking at things. There should be something for you at the city you would be moving to other than the person you are currently with. A job. An education. Mentorship. One or more of these should already be set in motion before you even relocate.
If you have done this, then I will eat my words without salt. If not, you sound like a dreamy little girl who is about to learn a really hard lesson about life. You could get lucky, but then the life lesson will not be learned.
Trust me. Make decisions that are self prosperous before making tandem decisions that are risky.
Sorry, but I am under the thought of losing yourself is a precursor to infatuation. Love as I see it doesn't send you into the clouds, instead it keeps you grounded by your own accord. Your judgment is clouded because leaving things behind is not the way you should be looking at things. There should be something for you at the city you would be moving to other than the person you are currently with. A job. An education. Mentorship. One or more of these should already be set in motion before you even relocate.
If you have done this, then I will eat my words without salt. If not, you sound like a dreamy little girl who is about to learn a really hard lesson about life. You could get lucky, but then the life lesson will not be learned.
Trust me. Make decisions that are self prosperous before making tandem decisions that are risky.
Posted by CrabraI hear wind blowing...between left and right ears...can you hear that?
@HeavyEntertainmentShow
Sorry, but I am under the thought of losing yourself is a precursor to infatuation. Love as I see it doesn't send you into the clouds, instead it keeps you grounded by your own accord. Your judgment is clouded because leaving things behind is not the way you should be looking at things. There should be something for you at the city you would be moving to other than the person you are currently with. A job. An education. Mentorship. One or more of these should already be set in motion before you even relocate.
If you have done this, then I will eat my words without salt. If not, you sound like a dreamy little girl who is about to learn a really hard lesson about life. You could get lucky, but then the life lesson will not be learned.
Trust me. Make decisions that are self prosperous before making tandem decisions that are risky.
Next picture will be more violent than previous one!
He can do anything!!! Anywhere!!! To anybody!!! Because he is a Lucifer?
I think...?
Posted by CrabraI agree, this is sound advice
@HeavyEntertainmentShow
Sorry, but I am under the thought of losing yourself is a precursor to infatuation. Love as I see it doesn't send you into the clouds, instead it keeps you grounded by your own accord. Your judgment is clouded because leaving things behind is not the way you should be looking at things. There should be something for you at the city you would be moving to other than the person you are currently with. A job. An education. Mentorship. One or more of these should already be set in motion before you even relocate.
If you have done this, then I will eat my words without salt. If not, you sound like a dreamy little girl who is about to learn a really hard lesson about life. You could get lucky, but then the life lesson will not be learned.
Trust me. Make decisions that are self prosperous before making tandem decisions that are risky.
Also, for anyone to call anyone else God, Demigod etc.......i find that a bit worrying, it does, as the gent above states indicate infatuation....obsession etc
Posted by GemitatiPosted by CrabraI hear wind blowing...between left and right ears...can you hear that?
@HeavyEntertainmentShow
Sorry, but I am under the thought of losing yourself is a precursor to infatuation. Love as I see it doesn't send you into the clouds, instead it keeps you grounded by your own accord. Your judgment is clouded because leaving things behind is not the way you should be looking at things. There should be something for you at the city you would be moving to other than the person you are currently with. A job. An education. Mentorship. One or more of these should already be set in motion before you even relocate.
If you have done this, then I will eat my words without salt. If not, you sound like a dreamy little girl who is about to learn a really hard lesson about life. You could get lucky, but then the life lesson will not be learned.
Trust me. Make decisions that are self prosperous before making tandem decisions that are risky.
Next picture will be more violent than previous one!
He can do anything!!! Anywhere!!! To anybody!!! Because he is a Lucifer?
I think...?click to expand
I can hear it too. But I've never hear the devil referred to as an object. Nice!
I met a guy who i was with for a while....he was 23 and i was older...
Looking back, i am not sure how i thought it could last with him. At that age young men are not even adults emotionally, but i thought it would work out
Age gaps are tricky.....two people wanting different things, at different places in their lives
If your guy is much younger than you, i would be very very wary about up rooting yourself and moving away...it could be something you may regret
He is not a God....he is a younger(?) man who you may need to let free at some stage
Looking back, i am not sure how i thought it could last with him. At that age young men are not even adults emotionally, but i thought it would work out
Age gaps are tricky.....two people wanting different things, at different places in their lives
If your guy is much younger than you, i would be very very wary about up rooting yourself and moving away...it could be something you may regret
He is not a God....he is a younger(?) man who you may need to let free at some stage
Posted by CrabraIt's because English is my third language...?Posted by GemitatiPosted by CrabraI hear wind blowing...between left and right ears...can you hear that?
@HeavyEntertainmentShow
Sorry, but I am under the thought of losing yourself is a precursor to infatuation. Love as I see it doesn't send you into the clouds, instead it keeps you grounded by your own accord. Your judgment is clouded because leaving things behind is not the way you should be looking at things. There should be something for you at the city you would be moving to other than the person you are currently with. A job. An education. Mentorship. One or more of these should already be set in motion before you even relocate.
If you have done this, then I will eat my words without salt. If not, you sound like a dreamy little girl who is about to learn a really hard lesson about life. You could get lucky, but then the life lesson will not be learned.
Trust me. Make decisions that are self prosperous before making tandem decisions that are risky.
Next picture will be more violent than previous one!
He can do anything!!! Anywhere!!! To anybody!!! Because he is a Lucifer?
I think...?
I can hear it too. But I've never hear the devil referred to as an object. Nice!
click to expand
Posted by CrabraI left them behind long before I fell in love with Jed. I got used to the idea of not having the support of my family from a very early age. It's just who they are, a bunch of selfish chicks whose only concern is their own coochies. And my dad, well he never gave a shit for anyone he couldn't see in the mirror.
@HeavyEntertainmentShow
Sorry, but I am under the thought of losing yourself is a precursor to infatuation. Love as I see it doesn't send you into the clouds, instead it keeps you grounded by your own accord. Your judgment is clouded because leaving things behind is not the way you should be looking at things. There should be something for you at the city you would be moving to other than the person you are currently with. A job. An education. Mentorship. One or more of these should already be set in motion before you even relocate.
If you have done this, then I will eat my words without salt. If not, you sound like a dreamy little girl who is about to learn a really hard lesson about life. You could get lucky, but then the life lesson will not be learned.
Trust me. Make decisions that are self prosperous before making tandem decisions that are risky.
As for having a backup plan for when moving to another city, my clients are online from all over the place so it's not a matter for concern. Besides it was just a brainstorming session while nude in bed, we certainly haven't made any plans. Just thinking out loud.
Posted by HeavyEntertainmentShowPosted by CrabraI left them behind long before I fell in love with Jed. I got used to the idea of not having the support of my family from a very early age. It's just who they are, a bunch of selfish chicks whose only concern is their own coochies. And my dad, well he never gave a shit for anyone he couldn't see in the mirror.
@HeavyEntertainmentShow
Sorry, but I am under the thought of losing yourself is a precursor to infatuation. Love as I see it doesn't send you into the clouds, instead it keeps you grounded by your own accord. Your judgment is clouded because leaving things behind is not the way you should be looking at things. There should be something for you at the city you would be moving to other than the person you are currently with. A job. An education. Mentorship. One or more of these should already be set in motion before you even relocate.
If you have done this, then I will eat my words without salt. If not, you sound like a dreamy little girl who is about to learn a really hard lesson about life. You could get lucky, but then the life lesson will not be learned.
Trust me. Make decisions that are self prosperous before making tandem decisions that are risky.
As for having a backup plan for when moving to another city, my clients are online from all over the place so it's not a matter for concern. Besides it was just a brainstorming session while nude in bed, we certainly haven't made any plans. Just thinking out loud.click to expand
My concern is more for him than you actually. Take no offense, and I understand that you are pondering possibilities. The best advice I can give is leave heavy and unnecessary baggage behind.
Posted by MyStarsShineHe turns 25 in late August. I've known him since he was 20 and he's always been mature beyond his years. I'd trust his judgement alot more than my Virgo ex's. And I know he's not a god........he just looks like one 😉
I met a guy who i was with for a while....he was 23 and i was older...
Looking back, i am not sure how i thought it could last with him. At that age young men are not even adults emotionally, but i thought it would work out
Age gaps are tricky.....two people wanting different things, at different places in their lives
If your guy is much younger than you, i would be very very wary about up rooting yourself and moving away...it could be something you may regret
He is not a God....he is a younger(?) man who you may need to let free at some stage
Matt was very new for me as he was my first love, I wasn't experienced in relationships but I like to think I treated him real good. We were just not in sync regarding what we wanted out of each other. I wanted something more, he was a sex addict. With Chris I had a bit more experience under my belt (literally), but circumstances beyond my control messed it up.
This time round, and 8 years later, I'm far more aware of what I want. I let Chris get away with a shit ton of stuff I wasn't happy about. It's not happening this time. I've read Jed the riot act. He knows I'll be good to him as long as he's good to me.
Posted by GemitatiPosted by CrabraIt's because English is my third language...?Posted by GemitatiPosted by CrabraI hear wind blowing...between left and right ears...can you hear that?
@HeavyEntertainmentShow
Sorry, but I am under the thought of losing yourself is a precursor to infatuation. Love as I see it doesn't send you into the clouds, instead it keeps you grounded by your own accord. Your judgment is clouded because leaving things behind is not the way you should be looking at things. There should be something for you at the city you would be moving to other than the person you are currently with. A job. An education. Mentorship. One or more of these should already be set in motion before you even relocate.
If you have done this, then I will eat my words without salt. If not, you sound like a dreamy little girl who is about to learn a really hard lesson about life. You could get lucky, but then the life lesson will not be learned.
Trust me. Make decisions that are self prosperous before making tandem decisions that are risky.
Next picture will be more violent than previous one!
He can do anything!!! Anywhere!!! To anybody!!! Because he is a Lucifer?
I think...?
I can hear it too. But I've never hear the devil referred to as an object. Nice!
click to expand
You continue to impress Gemitati. And I'm too complex for you? I'm just eccentric. You're actually smart 'n stuff!
Posted by CrabraEveryone has baggage, it's what happens with people. He's got plenty of baggage himself and I've been helping him deal with it for the past year. I am capable of putting it behind me.Posted by HeavyEntertainmentShowPosted by CrabraI left them behind long before I fell in love with Jed. I got used to the idea of not having the support of my family from a very early age. It's just who they are, a bunch of selfish chicks whose only concern is their own coochies. And my dad, well he never gave a shit for anyone he couldn't see in the mirror.
@HeavyEntertainmentShow
Sorry, but I am under the thought of losing yourself is a precursor to infatuation. Love as I see it doesn't send you into the clouds, instead it keeps you grounded by your own accord. Your judgment is clouded because leaving things behind is not the way you should be looking at things. There should be something for you at the city you would be moving to other than the person you are currently with. A job. An education. Mentorship. One or more of these should already be set in motion before you even relocate.
If you have done this, then I will eat my words without salt. If not, you sound like a dreamy little girl who is about to learn a really hard lesson about life. You could get lucky, but then the life lesson will not be learned.
Trust me. Make decisions that are self prosperous before making tandem decisions that are risky.
As for having a backup plan for when moving to another city, my clients are online from all over the place so it's not a matter for concern. Besides it was just a brainstorming session while nude in bed, we certainly haven't made any plans. Just thinking out loud.
My concern is more for him than you actually. Take no offense, and I understand that you are pondering possibilities. The best advice I can give is leave heavy and unnecessary baggage behind.
click to expand
Besides, deep down isn't everything about your mindset? Changing your surroundings doesn't change who you are, and if you don't learn from past mistakes - like holding on too tight to bitterness or anger, you're doomed to repeat them and ruin your "fresh start".
I'm ready to take the next step and leaving sleeping dogs lie, and Jed is thinking ahead. Whether my next step and Jed's forward thinking land on the same spot on the map remains to be seen. I hope it does.
Posted by GemitatiThey're always to quick to brand it as mental illness, when in fact they're just too big a pussy to let their dark side come out & play sometimes. It's all about balance. You can't be nice all the time, it's tiresome.Posted by HeavyEntertainmentShowOMG! Are you going to kili somebody?Posted by GemitatiYou say negative, I sayPosted by HeavyEntertainmentShowLol. But why so angry? Your negative energy is palpable. What's wrong?Posted by GemitatiLion-Virgin = Jed Leo/Virgo cusp, August 23. And trouble with my Lion-Virgin? You must be confusing me with CC. I know how to treat my man good. She only knows how to make them run for the hills, screaming in terror.
@HeavyEntertainmentShow
What do you mean Virgin? Lion-Virgin?
And why are you so uptight? I can hardly imagine how can you be 'angry in love'?
Indication of trouble in a Paradise. To me anyway...
Focused anticipation, preparing a big prank on several people.
'Preparing a big prank on several people' sounds like a mental illness.
You need help!
Get it!click to expand
It's healthy to let your inner Crowley out to play once in a while.
Posted by HeavyEntertainmentShowPosted by CrabraEveryone has baggage, it's what happens with people. He's got plenty of baggage himself and I've been helping him deal with it for the past year. I am capable of putting it behind me.Posted by HeavyEntertainmentShowPosted by CrabraI left them behind long before I fell in love with Jed. I got used to the idea of not having the support of my family from a very early age. It's just who they are, a bunch of selfish chicks whose only concern is their own coochies. And my dad, well he never gave a shit for anyone he couldn't see in the mirror.
@HeavyEntertainmentShow
Sorry, but I am under the thought of losing yourself is a precursor to infatuation. Love as I see it doesn't send you into the clouds, instead it keeps you grounded by your own accord. Your judgment is clouded because leaving things behind is not the way you should be looking at things. There should be something for you at the city you would be moving to other than the person you are currently with. A job. An education. Mentorship. One or more of these should already be set in motion before you even relocate.
If you have done this, then I will eat my words without salt. If not, you sound like a dreamy little girl who is about to learn a really hard lesson about life. You could get lucky, but then the life lesson will not be learned.
Trust me. Make decisions that are self prosperous before making tandem decisions that are risky.
As for having a backup plan for when moving to another city, my clients are online from all over the place so it's not a matter for concern. Besides it was just a brainstorming session while nude in bed, we certainly haven't made any plans. Just thinking out loud.
My concern is more for him than you actually. Take no offense, and I understand that you are pondering possibilities. The best advice I can give is leave heavy and unnecessary baggage behind.
Besides, deep down isn't everything about your mindset? Changing your surroundings doesn't change who you are, and if you don't learn from past mistakes - like holding on too tight to bitterness or anger, you're doomed to repeat them and ruin your "fresh start".
I'm ready to take the next step and leaving sleeping dogs lie, and Jed is thinking ahead. Whether my next step and Jed's forward thinking land on the same spot on the map remains to be seen. I hope it does.click to expand
Actually no. Not everyone carries baggage. Some people, truly know how to let go of their past. This must be done before you can look forward to the future. The past keeps you in the past, and is common knowledge.
That said, I do admire your mindset. I am not telling you to not move on, and again, my thoughts concern him. You're fine, and I am not so sure he can accept that you are. My concern for you only involves the possibility to let this man go once he realizes that some of the services he wishes to provide for you are not necessary.
I am on the outside looking in, and only speaking from experience. Tandem growth is truly a beautiful thing, and I really hope this is in the stars for you. Just mind his feelings along with yours.
Posted by SofiaV87Loving or luuuuuuuving?
Yes, u may lose yourself but u won't know for sure until it's happening .. then maybe u can slap yourself in the face in the process of losing yourself, snap out of it & continuing loving your demigod
And it's all in the head, isn't it? Some call it losing yourself, others can call it "letting someone else take the reins because you're too tired of constantly being on top".
I'm for the most part a top, but even I need some downtime.
Posted by HeavyEntertainmentShowTo be honest, i would be more worried about what he wants....i have been there with more than one young guyPosted by MyStarsShineHe turns 25 in late August. I've known him since he was 20 and he's always been mature beyond his years. I'd trust his judgement alot more than my Virgo ex's. And I know he's not a god........he just looks like one 😉
I met a guy who i was with for a while....he was 23 and i was older...
Looking back, i am not sure how i thought it could last with him. At that age young men are not even adults emotionally, but i thought it would work out
Age gaps are tricky.....two people wanting different things, at different places in their lives
If your guy is much younger than you, i would be very very wary about up rooting yourself and moving away...it could be something you may regret
He is not a God....he is a younger(?) man who you may need to let free at some stage
Matt was very new for me as he was my first love, I wasn't experienced in relationships but I like to think I treated him real good. We were just not in sync regarding what we wanted out of each other. I wanted something more, he was a sex addict. With Chris I had a bit more experience under my belt (literally), but circumstances beyond my control messed it up.
This time round, and 8 years later, I'm far more aware of what I want. I let Chris get away with a shit ton of stuff I wasn't happy about. It's not happening this time. I've read Jed the riot act. He knows I'll be good to him as long as he's good to me.click to expand
Posted by HeavyEntertainmentShowPosted by BlackburnYou say rude, I say honest. Too many people in the world
I'm one of those. My personality doesn't combine with my partner's, but I change.
The thing that scares me the most is not just that loss, but thinking what would happen if or when that person disappears from my life. The best for me is always keeping areas for myself (time, activity, friends) because when it's over I recover fast, the hard part is building yourself again.
Mellow out... don't you like your bitter and rude self?
And I might be bitter upto a point when it comes to my family, but resentment is all it is. I have no feelings for them whatsoever. I just resent those who mistreat me. And the beauty of it is: I can be easily distracted by the beautiful things in life, especially those who keep coming back 😄
I've been on my own plenty, now I'm more than ready to give long-term partnership a solid go. I'm too stubborn to completely lose myself anyway lol. And my Lion-Virgin likes me stubborn.click to expand
----
I like my bitter and rude self but truth doesn't need to be harsh. I can handle the juittth, maybe is you who can't handle harmony.
Is normal to feel resentment but you should try letting it go, it burns you.
What I like the most about my warrior-fish friend is how he can be tender and an asshole at the same time. And how easily is pissed off. Delightful.
Yeah, don't lose yourself, I think you give too much credit to him when is you who have done most of the work. Pisces' idolatry is fascinating to me. Don't know in which way.
Posted by CrabraI mind his feelings far more than I've ever minded my own, that's why I never forced myself on him in the past and let him come to me all on his own. We're moving along at his pace, not mine.Posted by HeavyEntertainmentShowPosted by CrabraEveryone has baggage, it's what happens with people. He's got plenty of baggage himself and I've been helping him deal with it for the past year. I am capable of putting it behind me.Posted by HeavyEntertainmentShowPosted by CrabraI left them behind long before I fell in love with Jed. I got used to the idea of not having the support of my family from a very early age. It's just who they are, a bunch of selfish chicks whose only concern is their own coochies. And my dad, well he never gave a shit for anyone he couldn't see in the mirror.
@HeavyEntertainmentShow
Sorry, but I am under the thought of losing yourself is a precursor to infatuation. Love as I see it doesn't send you into the clouds, instead it keeps you grounded by your own accord. Your judgment is clouded because leaving things behind is not the way you should be looking at things. There should be something for you at the city you would be moving to other than the person you are currently with. A job. An education. Mentorship. One or more of these should already be set in motion before you even relocate.
If you have done this, then I will eat my words without salt. If not, you sound like a dreamy little girl who is about to learn a really hard lesson about life. You could get lucky, but then the life lesson will not be learned.
Trust me. Make decisions that are self prosperous before making tandem decisions that are risky.
As for having a backup plan for when moving to another city, my clients are online from all over the place so it's not a matter for concern. Besides it was just a brainstorming session while nude in bed, we certainly haven't made any plans. Just thinking out loud.
My concern is more for him than you actually. Take no offense, and I understand that you are pondering possibilities. The best advice I can give is leave heavy and unnecessary baggage behind.
Besides, deep down isn't everything about your mindset? Changing your surroundings doesn't change who you are, and if you don't learn from past mistakes - like holding on too tight to bitterness or anger, you're doomed to repeat them and ruin your "fresh start".
I'm ready to take the next step and leaving sleeping dogs lie, and Jed is thinking ahead. Whether my next step and Jed's forward thinking land on the same spot on the map remains to be seen. I hope it does.
Actually no. Not everyone carries baggage. Some people, truly know how to let go of their past. This must be done before you can look forward to the future. The past keeps you in the past, and is common knowledge.
That said, I do admire your mindset. I am not telling you to not move on, and again, my thoughts concern him. You're fine, and I am not so sure he can accept that you are. My concern for you only involves the possibility to let this man go once he realizes that some of the services he wishes to provide for you are not necessary.
I am on the outside looking in, and only speaking from experience. Tandem growth is truly a beautiful thing, and I really hope this is in the stars for you. Just mind his feelings along with yours.
click to expand
Definitely not putting any extra pressure on him or having unreasonable expectations of him like he's my salvation or anything. I love him for who he is and what I've already seen of him. I've loved him for 3 years now. This isn't the case of looking at him through rose-tinted glasses. That period has come & gone.
In the words of Gary Barlow:
want what you got, then you'll always have enough.
I know he's not perfect in the perfect sense, and he sure knows I'm not perfect. But we like & enjoy each other anyway. There's no reason to overcomplicate things for either one of us. We'll get there, or we won't. There's no point stressing over what-ifs. We both got enough on our plate without adding to it.
Posted by BlackburnIt's not about credit. He is the reason why my life is brighter now. He came in at a point where I was ready to throw in the towel because it seemed like a perpetual Sisyphus deal. At the risk of contradicting what I said a while back "we often confuse the message with the messenger", we're only human and there's only so much disappointment we can take before we say "enough is enough, I don't wanna do this anymore".Posted by HeavyEntertainmentShowPosted by BlackburnYou say rude, I say honest. Too many people in the world
I'm one of those. My personality doesn't combine with my partner's, but I change.
The thing that scares me the most is not just that loss, but thinking what would happen if or when that person disappears from my life. The best for me is always keeping areas for myself (time, activity, friends) because when it's over I recover fast, the hard part is building yourself again.
Mellow out... don't you like your bitter and rude self?
And I might be bitter upto a point when it comes to my family, but resentment is all it is. I have no feelings for them whatsoever. I just resent those who mistreat me. And the beauty of it is: I can be easily distracted by the beautiful things in life, especially those who keep coming back 😄
I've been on my own plenty, now I'm more than ready to give long-term partnership a solid go. I'm too stubborn to completely lose myself anyway lol. And my Lion-Virgin likes me stubborn.
----
I like my bitter and rude self but truth doesn't need to be harsh. I can handle the juittth, maybe is you who can't handle harmony.
Is normal to feel resentment but you should try letting it go, it burns you.
What I like the most about my warrior-fish friend is how he can be tender and an asshole at the same time. And how easily is pissed off. Delightful.
Yeah, don't lose yourself, I think you give too much credit to him when is you who have done most of the work. Pisces' idolatry is fascinating to me. Don't know in which way.click to expand
I can do harmony better than most when things are good, simply because I'm easy to please. He can do it with a smile. What makes me happy is the effect I have on him. He's always laughing when he's with me. When he's upset and we talk about it, he's visibly calmer and more relaxed afterwards. That's all I want to see.
Whatever happens next, we're certainly not making plans. Just going with the flow.
Posted by Crabra? Yeah...I have this effect on people!Posted by GemitatiPosted by CrabraIt's because English is my third language...?Posted by GemitatiPosted by CrabraI hear wind blowing...between left and right ears...can you hear that?
@HeavyEntertainmentShow
Sorry, but I am under the thought of losing yourself is a precursor to infatuation. Love as I see it doesn't send you into the clouds, instead it keeps you grounded by your own accord. Your judgment is clouded because leaving things behind is not the way you should be looking at things. There should be something for you at the city you would be moving to other than the person you are currently with. A job. An education. Mentorship. One or more of these should already be set in motion before you even relocate.
If you have done this, then I will eat my words without salt. If not, you sound like a dreamy little girl who is about to learn a really hard lesson about life. You could get lucky, but then the life lesson will not be learned.
Trust me. Make decisions that are self prosperous before making tandem decisions that are risky.
Next picture will be more violent than previous one!
He can do anything!!! Anywhere!!! To anybody!!! Because he is a Lucifer?
I think...?
I can hear it too. But I've never hear the devil referred to as an object. Nice!
You continue to impress Gemitati. And I'm too complex for you? I'm just eccentric. You're actually smart 'n stuff!
click to expand
I don't know if you are too complex for me.
I like to learn so go ahead. Try my 'smarts' and 'crazies'...? Can be fun!
Posted by HeavyEntertainmentShowOh no! Being so crazy and loving is a sheer madness! But none of the mentals admit it. Hope I am wrong.Posted by GemitatiThey're always to quick to brand it as mental illness, when in fact they're just too big a pussy to let their dark side come out & play sometimes. It's all about balance. You can't be nice all the time, it's tiresome.Posted by HeavyEntertainmentShowOMG! Are you going to kili somebody?Posted by GemitatiYou say negative, I sayPosted by HeavyEntertainmentShowLol. But why so angry? Your negative energy is palpable. What's wrong?Posted by GemitatiLion-Virgin = Jed Leo/Virgo cusp, August 23. And trouble with my Lion-Virgin? You must be confusing me with CC. I know how to treat my man good. She only knows how to make them run for the hills, screaming in terror.
@HeavyEntertainmentShow
What do you mean Virgin? Lion-Virgin?
And why are you so uptight? I can hardly imagine how can you be 'angry in love'?
Indication of trouble in a Paradise. To me anyway...
Focused anticipation, preparing a big prank on several people.
'Preparing a big prank on several people' sounds like a mental illness.
You need help!
Get it!
It's healthy to let your inner Crowley out to play once in a while.click to expand
Posted by HeavyEntertainmentShowNo marriage in August? AaaaaahPosted by BlackburnIt's not about credit. He is the reason why my life is brighter now. He came in at a point where I was ready to throw in the towel because it seemed like a perpetual Sisyphus deal. At the risk of contradicting what I said a while back "we often confuse the message with the messenger", we're only human and there's only so much disappointment we can take before we say "enough is enough, I don't wanna do this anymore".Posted by HeavyEntertainmentShowPosted by BlackburnYou say rude, I say honest. Too many people in the world
I'm one of those. My personality doesn't combine with my partner's, but I change.
The thing that scares me the most is not just that loss, but thinking what would happen if or when that person disappears from my life. The best for me is always keeping areas for myself (time, activity, friends) because when it's over I recover fast, the hard part is building yourself again.
Mellow out... don't you like your bitter and rude self?
And I might be bitter upto a point when it comes to my family, but resentment is all it is. I have no feelings for them whatsoever. I just resent those who mistreat me. And the beauty of it is: I can be easily distracted by the beautiful things in life, especially those who keep coming back 😄
I've been on my own plenty, now I'm more than ready to give long-term partnership a solid go. I'm too stubborn to completely lose myself anyway lol. And my Lion-Virgin likes me stubborn.
----
I like my bitter and rude self but truth doesn't need to be harsh. I can handle the juittth, maybe is you who can't handle harmony.
Is normal to feel resentment but you should try letting it go, it burns you.
What I like the most about my warrior-fish friend is how he can be tender and an asshole at the same time. And how easily is pissed off. Delightful.
Yeah, don't lose yourself, I think you give too much credit to him when is you who have done most of the work. Pisces' idolatry is fascinating to me. Don't know in which way.
I can do harmony better than most when things are good, simply because I'm easy to please. He can do it with a smile. What makes me happy is the effect I have on him. He's always laughing when he's with me. When he's upset and we talk about it, he's visibly calmer and more relaxed afterwards. That's all I want to see.
Whatever happens next, we're certainly not making plans. Just going with the flow.click to expand
Posted by HeavyEntertainmentShowPosted by BlackburnIt's not about credit. He is the reason why my life is brighter now. He came in at a point where I was ready to throw in the towel because it seemed like a perpetual Sisyphus deal. At the risk of contradicting what I said a while back "we often confuse the message with the messenger", we're only human and there's only so much disappointment we can take before we say "enough is enough, I don't wanna do this anymore".Posted by HeavyEntertainmentShowPosted by BlackburnYou say rude, I say honest. Too many people in the world
I'm one of those. My personality doesn't combine with my partner's, but I change.
The thing that scares me the most is not just that loss, but thinking what would happen if or when that person disappears from my life. The best for me is always keeping areas for myself (time, activity, friends) because when it's over I recover fast, the hard part is building yourself again.
Mellow out... don't you like your bitter and rude self?
And I might be bitter upto a point when it comes to my family, but resentment is all it is. I have no feelings for them whatsoever. I just resent those who mistreat me. And the beauty of it is: I can be easily distracted by the beautiful things in life, especially those who keep coming back 😄
I've been on my own plenty, now I'm more than ready to give long-term partnership a solid go. I'm too stubborn to completely lose myself anyway lol. And my Lion-Virgin likes me stubborn.
----
I like my bitter and rude self but truth doesn't need to be harsh. I can handle the juittth, maybe is you who can't handle harmony.
Is normal to feel resentment but you should try letting it go, it burns you.
What I like the most about my warrior-fish friend is how he can be tender and an asshole at the same time. And how easily is pissed off. Delightful.
Yeah, don't lose yourself, I think you give too much credit to him when is you who have done most of the work. Pisces' idolatry is fascinating to me. Don't know in which way.
I can do harmony better than most when things are good, simply because I'm easy to please. He can do it with a smile. What makes me happy is the effect I have on him. He's always laughing when he's with me. When he's upset and we talk about it, he's visibly calmer and more relaxed afterwards. That's all I want to see.
Whatever happens next, we're certainly not making plans. Just going with the flow.click to expand
----
It is said things happen for a reason. Don't you feel spoiling him can make him take you for granted? I don't know your daily "real" life, so maybe is the way you talk about him putting him into a pedestal; I just expect he works too, because he seems to be perfect just by being himself.
Well, my take on this is go with the flow if that's what you both want. Is really kind that you don't want to push him due tu his circumstances but you matter too and suppressing your desires for others is going to hurt you in the long run. Besides that, is awesome to love and be loved.
Posted by BlackburnPosted by HeavyEntertainmentShowPosted by BlackburnIt's not about credit. He is the reason why my life is brighter now. He came in at a point where I was ready to throw in the towel because it seemed like a perpetual Sisyphus deal. At the risk of contradicting what I said a while back "we often confuse the message with the messenger", we're only human and there's only so much disappointment we can take before we say "enough is enough, I don't wanna do this anymore".Posted by HeavyEntertainmentShowPosted by BlackburnYou say rude, I say honest. Too many people in the world
I'm one of those. My personality doesn't combine with my partner's, but I change.
The thing that scares me the most is not just that loss, but thinking what would happen if or when that person disappears from my life. The best for me is always keeping areas for myself (time, activity, friends) because when it's over I recover fast, the hard part is building yourself again.
Mellow out... don't you like your bitter and rude self?
And I might be bitter upto a point when it comes to my family, but resentment is all it is. I have no feelings for them whatsoever. I just resent those who mistreat me. And the beauty of it is: I can be easily distracted by the beautiful things in life, especially those who keep coming back 😄
I've been on my own plenty, now I'm more than ready to give long-term partnership a solid go. I'm too stubborn to completely lose myself anyway lol. And my Lion-Virgin likes me stubborn.
----
I like my bitter and rude self but truth doesn't need to be harsh. I can handle the juittth, maybe is you who can't handle harmony.
Is normal to feel resentment but you should try letting it go, it burns you.
What I like the most about my warrior-fish friend is how he can be tender and an asshole at the same time. And how easily is pissed off. Delightful.
Yeah, don't lose yourself, I think you give too much credit to him when is you who have done most of the work. Pisces' idolatry is fascinating to me. Don't know in which way.
I can do harmony better than most when things are good, simply because I'm easy to please. He can do it with a smile. What makes me happy is the effect I have on him. He's always laughing when he's with me. When he's upset and we talk about it, he's visibly calmer and more relaxed afterwards. That's all I want to see.
Whatever happens next, we're certainly not making plans. Just going with the flow.
----
It is said things happen for a reason. Don't you feel spoiling him can make him take you for granted? I don't know your daily "real" life, so maybe is the way you talk about him putting him into a pedestal; I just expect he works too, because he seems to be perfect just by being himself.
Well, my take on this is go with the flow if that's what you both want. Is really kind that you don't want to push him due tu his circumstances but you matter too and suppressing your desires for others is going to hurt you in the long run. Besides that, is awesome to love and be loved.
click to expand
We actually talked about that very thing a couple nights ago. I asked him point blank if he wants me to tone down the constant compliments. He grinned from ear to ear but blushed furiously and shook his head, saying in a quiet voice "I love it when you say things to me". Cracking up just recalling his bright red face lol, makes his blond hair really stand out.
We started as friends. He was fine with me being gay as long as I didn't make any unwanted overtures towards him. But our seemingly polar-opposite personalities blended really well and we grew close quickly. He's much friendlier than me when you first meet him, whereas I keep it on the down-low, take a step back & observe. I was attracted to him the moment I laid eyeballs on him, but I promised not to cross the line and I kept my promise.
Sexually into him for 4 years, in love with him for 3. Patience is indeed a virtue. Putting my wants ahead of his would've only destroyed our friendship as it would've shown that my word means nothing. His friendship was more important to me than getting my rocks off. He's a demigod on the outside, and equally beautiful on the inside. A genuine good boy. I kept my promise because I'm a man of my word, and I also didn't want to lose him.
Life is pretty funny sometimes. At first I thought he gave me what I wanted because he didn't wanna lose ME. But now he's appearing to be really enjoying himself. And like I said, I'm easy to please. There's more in him I enjoy than just the sexual stuff, and he knows that. Just having him in my arms makes me happier than I've ever been in my life. And I'm the first guy he's ever been with, this is all new to him. Rushing him would have the opposite effect. Baby steps, at his own pace. It started on my birthday in March this year and upto now, we have indeed gone all the way. In DXP terms, he has fucked me and I have fucked him 😄
I know it doesn't mean much just saying it. If you met him, you'd instantly know what the fuss is about. He glows with goodness.
Posted by GemitatiPosted by Crabra? Yeah...I have this effect on people!Posted by GemitatiPosted by CrabraIt's because English is my third language...?Posted by GemitatiPosted by CrabraI hear wind blowing...between left and right ears...can you hear that?
@HeavyEntertainmentShow
Sorry, but I am under the thought of losing yourself is a precursor to infatuation. Love as I see it doesn't send you into the clouds, instead it keeps you grounded by your own accord. Your judgment is clouded because leaving things behind is not the way you should be looking at things. There should be something for you at the city you would be moving to other than the person you are currently with. A job. An education. Mentorship. One or more of these should already be set in motion before you even relocate.
If you have done this, then I will eat my words without salt. If not, you sound like a dreamy little girl who is about to learn a really hard lesson about life. You could get lucky, but then the life lesson will not be learned.
Trust me. Make decisions that are self prosperous before making tandem decisions that are risky.
Next picture will be more violent than previous one!
He can do anything!!! Anywhere!!! To anybody!!! Because he is a Lucifer?
I think...?
I can hear it too. But I've never hear the devil referred to as an object. Nice!
You continue to impress Gemitati. And I'm too complex for you? I'm just eccentric. You're actually smart 'n stuff!
I don't know if you are too complex for me.
I like to learn so go ahead. Try my 'smarts' and 'crazies'...? Can be fun!click to expand
Well, you told me I was! But the more of your posts I read, the more difficult that becomes to believe.
Lemme know if you ever need help with your homework. I tutor on Wednesdays and Saturdays btw 😉
Join the Conversation. Explore Yourself. Connect with Others.
Discover insights, swap stories, and find people. dxpnet is where experiences turn into understanding.
Create Your Free Account →Related Topics
I sometimes see people selling weird things like "used mattresses" I dont know about you but I think this is kind of gross/disgusting but there must be enough people who think this is fine for it to be such a common thing to be sold. What are your controv
Trying not to be a Debbie Downer but life is kicking me in the ass right now.
My son got diagnosed with diabetes
My grandfather is on his last few days (Hospice estimated around a week on Wednesday)
My Libra love had to have a biopsy on a lipoma to
What's everyone's age?
I'm 39
@_@
Been 4.5 years since I left!
https://media.giphy.com/media/WUq1cg9K7uzHa/giphy.gif
Will be pretty much my first time in LA and SF. Then I can't wait to visit old/new spots in NYC.
Any recommendations?
By the way, is DXP chat still running?
I had never had FB account.
Today I had created one and have fake name and my private email that no one knows and verified with my cell phone number.
First person in 'you might know these people' popped a person with whom I had never had any contacts
When the power goes out in the entire building at work...
Then your child's father comes to your job bringing flowers...
But you don't want him... you're just happy to see him crawling at your feet..
Then angry that he thinks your stupid enough
Why does overbite get such a bad rap?
For those unfamiliar with the term, it's a physical occurence where the upper or lower row of teeth can be misaligned, making the corresponding lip stick out more than usual. I can understand in extreme cases it ca
I've flat out asked for one twice and given reasons why i think it is warranted but have been given the brush off or run around both times.
Normally this is where i'd start exploring other options but I'm in my thirties and am tired of starting over. P
I'm sitting here eating and realizing how much i love tasting food.
So. What's your favorite sense?
Any parents feel so overwhelmed to the point where they can say if they started life all over they wouldn't have children?
I was told this today and being the emotionally awkward fuck that I am, didn't have good advice or calming words. I just bussed
Pilot Episode.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TiN8ZGwhqA4
I'm moving to Philadelphia from LA in a couple of months for school.
I'm a little worried that I'm going to get lonely and fall into depression.
Especially with the weather and all.
My plan to prevent this is to join a lot of clubs and organizati
This guy walked around in new York in the male romper for 10 hours and people lost their damn minds XD https://youtu.be/37BdS5KH9K8
What I noticed most of the women LOVED it.. Lmao lots of cat calls and pic
And most of the Men hated it lots of harsh in
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=s7L2PVdrb_8
START DAY AND TIME
GAME STARTS TONIGHT (6/5/17)
7PM PST (10PM EST)
Roles will be distributed 15 minutes prior to game start
NIGHT: 8PM PST (11PM EST) to 8AM PST (11PM EST)
DAY: 8AM PST (11PM EST) to
Could this be a budding romance?
Me: I was attracted to you. Even more attracted to you now.
She: Everybody knows you're smart, good looking & nice.
:) I'm blushing.
CC is a black woman but I see in her Caucasoid features. No kidding. I really think she's pretty. Beautiful? A little makeover I guess. Or the help of some stylist. I hope you won't be bothered by this, CC, but I do see your potential. :)
...I like you CC. The reason why I posted those threads is to provoke you coz you're funny when provoked. Those are just fake aggression. DXP without CC would be very boring. :(
I haven't had a proper relationship to the rest of my family, and I've only briefly interacted with my toddler nephew 3-4 times in the past 12 months. We haven't bonded or anything and I certainly haven't spent any quality time with family members in almost 15 years. Every single one of them is like a stranger to me so never seeing any of them again wouldn't break my heart.
I casually said "it'd be a solid next step to take.....and I could come with you". His eyes lit up and I'm fairly sure he blushed lol - although he'll emphatically deny it till the end of his days. Then his face became thoughtful and asked me if I'm really sure about that. When I assured him I am and asked him to clarify, he said that he doesn't want me to agree with everything he says by default, and that it's healthier to have differing opinions once in a while. This is reminiscent of the times he's expressed interest in seeing my darker side come out to play lol.
So I had to explain that it's not a matter of attempting to maintain a perpetual state of harmony by agreeing on everything he decides. But rather it's exactly what I mean deep down. Consider me battle-weary. For the most part of the 20 past years I've had to have a go at it by myself because everyone else around me was too useless to rely on for help. But now I'm 32 and way past ready to change that. It's long overdue. I'm tired of always only relying on myself, and sometimes it takes a drastic move to make enough of an impact that will steer your life in a different direction.
It's not a matter of being a less ballshier version of myself, it's more like being ready to put the first 30 years of my life behind me and start Life 2.0. Jed is the only thing keeping me here & keeping me going. So if he decides to move to another state in the future, it'll be the perfect first step for me towards the fresh start that is long overdue. Home is where the heart is, and my heart is his.
Reminds me of a certain lyric
And I never minded being on my own
Then something broke in me and I wanted to go home to be where you are
And now I'm reaching out with every note I sing
And I hope it gets to you on some pacific wind
Wraps itself around you and whispers in your ear
Tells you that I love you and I wish that you were here
Hmm, not sure what I was trying to say here. I guess that question mark is rhetorical, but I believe there are people out there who feel like they're losing themselves when they're in love. Like their personality is being assimilated into their partner, losing their edge or identity. I like my edge, but I also like to think I'd mellow out with age. You think there's any chance of that?