MyStarsShine
@MyStarsShine
9 Years25,000+ Posts
Comments: 37529 · Posts: 41243 · Topics: 331
Parenting and Children
It is easy to confuse a child giving their real opinion on something as giving you attitude. I think it's important to know the difference so that they feel confident in speaking out for themselves but not enough to overstep their boundaries.
Posted by OneKnightThat don't sound like fun 😥
I am struggling as a parent with my Gemini 12 year old son right now.
What's going on?
I can't imagine life without my son. I had him when I was 18 and split up with his Cancer dad a year later. Looking abck I think it was meant to be, for me to have him at such a young age. I was totally irresponsible and selfish, very immature. When I had him I felt like I aged 10 years mentally. The change is what cause me and my Cancer ex to fall apart. My mind was all about our son whereas he was still stuck with hanging out with friends, drinking and race cars.
I won't deny it life as a single mom is tough, there were times when I just wanted to give up but I look at him and him alone was enough to push me to work hard.
I also made a lot of mistakes along the way which I am very thankful for because of the lessons I have learned and made me who I am today.
Stupid Libra was depressed because of my failed relationship, now I realize I don't have to be in a relationship. I have everything I need, my son.
I'm turning 33 in October and I always get asked why I haven't found a man yet. People have no idea how hard it is for single moms to find a relationship. See, they don't know that before we even decide to start dating someone we have to make sure that they will understand our children is our TOP PRIORITY. If they can't deal with that then they can fuck off. Simple.
I will never put someone else before my child. It's him and me until the end.
I won't deny it life as a single mom is tough, there were times when I just wanted to give up but I look at him and him alone was enough to push me to work hard.
I also made a lot of mistakes along the way which I am very thankful for because of the lessons I have learned and made me who I am today.
Stupid Libra was depressed because of my failed relationship, now I realize I don't have to be in a relationship. I have everything I need, my son.
I'm turning 33 in October and I always get asked why I haven't found a man yet. People have no idea how hard it is for single moms to find a relationship. See, they don't know that before we even decide to start dating someone we have to make sure that they will understand our children is our TOP PRIORITY. If they can't deal with that then they can fuck off. Simple.
I will never put someone else before my child. It's him and me until the end.
Dammit I'm getting all emotional lmao
Words can't describe the love I feel for my kiddo.
Words can't describe the love I feel for my kiddo.
My Virgent with a Leeb moon, 12 year old son (13 in Sept), is hitting puberty HARD right now.
Posted by OneKnightDoes he see his mother often?Posted by MyStarsShine
What's going on?
No Idea. I think he is hitting his teenage years.
He played hockey on the highest level for 4 years. Quite 2 months ago.
Broke up with his "girlfriend" 1 month ago.
Suspended from school twice. Once for fighting, once for stealing a flash drive with PARK scores while PARK test was given to students.
I'm at school every 3 days.
His bookbag is empty. No homework, no education. Nothing. One of the best students.
He is a Gem, so he is the most intelligent, but does not like education like me. He told me he did not learn anything new after 5th grade. I believe him.
The worst part is his Gemini lack of drive. He gives me Gemini answers to everything:
"So what you want to do when you grow up?" - "nothing".
"Do you want to get kicked out of school?" - "Yes".
"Do you want to do drugs?" - "Yes".
"Andre, you're high" - him
"Fly away" - him
"You're annoying" - him
He is a slob in his room, his bookbag, bed, etc.
He bought eCig kit online, because the whole school smokes. Took it away from him, he is angry I would not let him resell it at school. I bought him a real cigarette to try it, and kill his curiosity.
Impossible to reason with him. I treat him as an adult and I talk to him, but he knows better for now.
Yesterday they caught us cheating with a school address. I think they will throw him out.
They sent him home today with a Pink Eye.
He is sitting home playing xBox, Gemining other kids online by busting their balls.
My ex finally decided to move in with her bf. She quit her family business that she gave me up for.
If she smells blood with him being thrown out, there will be a custody war as it's perfect timing for her to get him back.
I can handle all those antics, but right now my mind is somewhere and this is the worst moment for me to
deal with this.
Thanks god I know Zodiac, otherwise I would punish him.
parenting for you without the bull shit click to expandclick to expand
Is she there for him?
Posted by OneKnightFigured you would relate to this. This is my son.Posted by MyStarsShine
What's going on?
No Idea. I think he is hitting his teenage years.
He played hockey on the highest level for 4 years. Quite 2 months ago.
Broke up with his "girlfriend" 1 month ago.
Suspended from school twice. Once for fighting, once for stealing a flash drive with PARK scores while PARK test was given to students.
I'm at school every 3 days....click to expandclick to expand
I didn't know myself until i gave birth to our son
Didn't realise the amount of love and patience I had. It's by far the best job and best decision I ever made to become a mum....love him so much ❤️
Thanks so much everyone for your comments and lovely to see the dads here too
Keep them coming 👍👍👍
Didn't realise the amount of love and patience I had. It's by far the best job and best decision I ever made to become a mum....love him so much ❤️
Thanks so much everyone for your comments and lovely to see the dads here too
Keep them coming 👍👍👍
Posted by NemDeux@NemDeuxPosted by ufo
i like being the cool aunt
this is the seed of doubt my father sowed in my kids ....he told them more than once that i (their mother) am in actuality their aunt and that their real mom is in south africa and gave them away ....
#gemini(grand)dads ://
click to expandclick to expand
Jesus Christ, what is wrong with him? 😲
Posted by OneKnightThanksPosted by MyStarsShine
Does he see his mother often?
Is she there for him?
So hard to answer this.
He sees her every other weekend.
She is there for him, but not really. She takes them places and is very fun. She hugs him when he is leaving her and it's super sincere, but she is a Sag.
They never ever have a deep conversation, or a conversation, where love is given emotionally. Maybe that's not needed for him, but I do that to him. I'm kind of a like a mom/lover in a way.
Basically imagine how Sag and Cancer are. That's the relationships he has with us. I hug him, and nurture him through out a day, but try to do it in a fun way, so he does not notice and mom is more of the fun factor.
She loves him, but does not know how to deliver that or is not aware of it that she needs to.
I of course do other Cancer mistakes as well.
When I was 19 I noticed my ex's approach to kids was off, and kids never gravitated to her. I was not aware what was going on, until I saw my Taurus daughter with kids and animals. That's when I realized women are different.
@Those who suggested boxing, wrestling, and etc. Thank you so much, that is what he is getting for his birthday.
click to expandclick to expand
How does he feel about her having a bf?
Every two weeks? Is that lately or for some time?
Oh I just saw she wasn't there for two years.....so she put the bf first?
When our lad found out a kid in his class shared the same birthday, he wanted know why the kid was taller than him. After thinking about it he said "do you think it's because he was born in the morning and I at night"
He was about six at the time
😆
He was about six at the time
😆
Kids gravitate to me like I've a magnet inside of me. Like animals, they sense when you love them.......i spend lots of time in convos with little kids at work, they are so interesting and fun to talk to ❤️. Their parents are sometimes boring lol
Posted by MasterfulBit higher than most for young bulls. Even as infants y'all are always hungry.
what is the maintenance cost of one of those little buggers?
Posted by NemDeuxLeo moon?Posted by MyStarsShinePosted by NemDeuxPosted by ufo
i like being the cool aunt
this is the seed of doubt my father sowed in my kids ....he told them more than once that i (their mother) am in actuality their aunt and that their real mom is in south africa and gave them away ....
#gemini(grand)dads ://
click to expand
@NemDeux
Jesus Christ, what is wrong with him? 😲 click to expand
he is a gemini 😂😂😂 click to expandclick to expand
Posted by MasterfulThousands upon thousands
what is the maintenance cost of one of those little buggers?
Lol
Been thinking about quitting my full time job. I started my small online store because I wanna quit by 2020. I feel like my son's childhood was a blur and now I wanna focus on him more.
In my 20s he was my top priority but I also wanted career growth. Now I could care less.
Lol never told anybody about this. Too dramatic.
In my 20s he was my top priority but I also wanted career growth. Now I could care less.
Lol never told anybody about this. Too dramatic.
Posted by OneKnightVery sad to read 💙😥
He was the one who found out mom had a bf and who it was and told me. I was too naive to even check.
The bf was the guy from mom's company, and we all knew him. He does not care about the bf, but knows the truth. My daughter lives with mom and does not like the BF at all. She is taking her to the psychologist because of that I think.
Every two weeks for 2.5 years now.
When we separated she took him, but he was a nightmare there. She had as much of a bad time with him as I have now. After 4 months he said he is not going back to mom. We were a bit too close when he was 6-8. He took the split badly, but when he came over to me, all those problems left. We were good, until the legal divorce. She wanted him back and used anything she could to take him. That's when I made a mistake. I shared everything with him, and we teamed up against mom, so he would not have to go back.
Lately, he told me we "teamed" up and he hated mom because of that, and it was my fault. Which probably was, except I only defended what his wish was. Every other weekend I ask him if he wants to go back to mom. He does not even want to hear it. But I am a bit hurt. Maybe I should have left him with her.
We get along perfect, except the stupid "I don't care if I do drugs", and other Gemini clowning behavior.
He just told his music teacher he can't sing for shit. Got thrown out. Tons of clownish attention behavior.
He is one of the most popular kids in middle school. Tons of girls around him.
I for the most part will let him be, and wait for him to mature. I noticed mom and her bf teamed up and came up with a plan to "raise" him. She punishes him for his school behavior and it's not really working, because Gem is a nervous energy. It backfires. He curses her out when angry, so I learned there's go to be a bether way.
My parents fight with me and say the same thing,that I have to punish him, scream, tell him, but telling Cancer how to raise kids is like telling Sag she does not like to travel.
Posted by DolluxxeI totally understand that Doll.....can't get those years back
Been thinking about quitting my full time job. I started my small online store because I wanna quit by 2020. I feel like my son's childhood was a blur and now I wanna focus on him more.
In my 20s he was my top priority but I also wanted career growth. Now I could care less.
Lol never told anybody about this. Too dramatic.
This is a parent confessional box lol......vent as much as you like.
Not dramatic at all .... very sweet 🙂
Posted by NemDeuxOh good 😊
@MyStarsShine ..
it's all good. no worries 😂
a.) slavic parents/family start to dish out when you are young; does not mean they don't love you ..
b.) my younger daughter is my clone just with blue eyes
c.) my oldest is the spitting image of her dad . .
excuse me; easter rabbit; father xmas; tooth fairy ....religion. cough cough.
Posted by RooSagicornWise words ma'am 👍Posted by OneKnightPosted by MyStarsShine
Does he see his mother often?
Is she there for him?
So hard to answer this.
He sees her every other weekend.
She is there for him, but not really. When she fall in love she was not really there for 2 years. Lately, when the honeymoon kind of ended, she became more available. She takes them places and is very fun. She hugs him when he is leaving her and it's super sincere, but she is a Sag.
They never ever have a deep conversation, or a conversation, where love is given emotionally. Maybe that's not needed for him, but I do that to him. I'm kind of a like a mom/lover in a way.
Basically imagine how Sag and Cancer are. That's the relationships he has with us. I hug him, and nurture him through out a day, but try to do it in a fun way, so he does not notice and mom is more of the fun factor.
She loves him, but does not know how to deliver that or is not aware of it that she needs to.
I of course do other Cancer mistakes as well.
When I was 19 I noticed my ex's approach to kids was off, and kids never gravitated to her. I was not aware what was going on, until I saw my Taurus daughter with kids and animals. That's when I realized women are different.
@Those who suggested boxing, wrestling, and etc. Thank you so much, that is what he is getting for his birthday.
click to expand
Interesting. Coparenting is hard. I’m a Sag & my ex is an Aries. I’m the nurturer and Aries is the fun one. Well we do fun things too, but I’m the one who listens and makes them listen to the deep stuff.. well I’m Cap dominant lol. All we can do is keep trying. They learn about the othe parent one way or another anyway. Mine are older but those middle school years were tough & my son was hella stubborn and adhd. My daughter omg the stuff she went through.. but they do grow up and be okay. My kids wanted to disown their father & I refused to let that happen. Threw my daughters ass in counseling instead.you know a lot of times they really just need to be heard. Hang in there!!! One step at a time. click to expandclick to expand
Being heard is as important to a child as being loved.....when someone says to a child, "I hear you, I get you", it has a profound effect....
Posted by MyStarsShineThank you Star 🙂Posted by Dolluxxe
Been thinking about quitting my full time job. I started my small online store because I wanna quit by 2020. I feel like my son's childhood was a blur and now I wanna focus on him more.
In my 20s he was my top priority but I also wanted career growth. Now I could care less.
Lol never told anybody about this. Too dramatic.
I totally understand that Doll.....can't get those years back
This is a parent confessional box lol......vent as much as you like.
Not dramatic at all .... very sweet click to expandclick to expand
This thread is wonderful, it feels good to vent - something I don't get to do a lot in real life.
Posted by DolluxxeI love this thread too ... a safe place to share and vent....please keep posting...❤️Posted by MyStarsShinePosted by Dolluxxe
Been thinking about quitting my full time job. I started my small online store because I wanna quit by 2020. I feel like my son's childhood was a blur and now I wanna focus on him more.
In my 20s he was my top priority but I also wanted career growth. Now I could care less.
Lol never told anybody about this. Too dramatic.
I totally understand that Doll.....can't get those years back
This is a parent confessional box lol......vent as much as you like.
Not dramatic at all .... very sweet click to expand
Thank you Star
This thread is wonderful, it feels good to vent - something I don't get to do a lot in real life. click to expandclick to expand
Son's dad and I started to watch videos of our lad from when he was 18 months upwards till he was 10. I couldn't begin to explain how I felt seeing all those years fall away. Our lovely blonde curly haired boy saying "daddy" and "mummy".....running around and being crazy lol.
And now he is 19 and away at college ... where do those years go?
Oh my
😥💙
And now he is 19 and away at college ... where do those years go?
Oh my
😥💙
Posted by OneKnightPosted by MyStarsShineNo no sir....not the wrong time....the right time.....very healing for you to share. I empathise with you and admire your honesty and allowing yourself to be vulnerable
I love this thread too ... a safe place to share and vent....please keep posting...❤️
Yeah, you caught me at the wrong moment with this thread. Moon is at 0 today. I have no power. Pure vulnerable.
click to expandclick to expand
It's clear you love your lad very much and he will always know that
💙
Posted by NemDeuxThanks very much! Love getting book recommendations
Dear Ijeawele, or A Feminist Manifesto in Fifteen Suggestions
By CHIMAMANDA NGOZI ADICHIE
a must read for parents!! imo.
👍🙂
Posted by RooSagicornGod that's harsh 😥Posted by OneKnight
^ good stuff - btw, don't all kids in this country have adhd and anxiety at that age?
^^ I don't know how to put a heart in here
Hmmm a lot. My son was diagnosed at 6. I didn’t want to believe it at first.. but he is actually a classic case 😳😳 a lot different than the other boys and got bullied for it in elementary & middle school. It’s been a tough road. He has calmed down a lot, and better impulse control. But distraction is still a big problem so he’s figuring life out with his own choices.
My daughter had some anxiety symptoms in elementary school but it blew up in middle school after she had a bad concussion and post concussive syndrome too. That resulted in full on depression & meltdowns, panic attacks on a major level. Self harm included. With the Aries telling her to suck it up that she didn’t have anything wrong ( before the post concussive syndrome diagnosis & occupational therapy etc) & telling my son he was lazy & worthless to the kid who was bullied in school ummmm yeah. I wonder why they wanted to disown him? click to expandclick to expand
I have never met anyone else that makes me laugh so hard and loud as our lad does.....he is an ace mimic and can impersonate anyone lol. When he was younger he would dress up in different costumes and put on shows for us haha..! (I used to do that for my family too when I was a kid )...
.....so no suprise he is going into the world of film and tv!
When I see him I always shout 🌟Shine on mister🌟 and he scowls then smiles.....then scowls
Lol
.....so no suprise he is going into the world of film and tv!
When I see him I always shout 🌟Shine on mister🌟 and he scowls then smiles.....then scowls
Lol
Posted by RooSagicornI was referring to the Aries, Roo...Posted by MyStarsShinePosted by RooSagicornPosted by OneKnight
^ good stuff - btw, don't all kids in this country have adhd and anxiety at that age?
^^ I don't know how to put a heart in here
Hmmm a lot. My son was diagnosed at 6. I didn’t want to believe it at first.. but he is actually a classic case 😳😳 a lot different than the other boys and got bullied for it in elementary & middle school. It’s been a tough road. He has calmed down a lot, and better impulse control. But distraction is still a big problem so he’s figuring life out with his own choices.
My daughter had some anxiety symptoms in elementary school but it blew up in middle school after she had a bad concussion and post concussive syndrome too. That resulted in full on depression & meltdowns, panic attacks on a major level. Self harm included. With the Aries telling her to suck it up that she didn’t have anything wrong ( before the post concussive syndrome diagnosis & occupational therapy etc) & telling my son he was lazy & worthless to the kid who was bullied in school ummmm yeah. I wonder why they wanted to disown him? click to expand
God that's harsh 😥 click to expand
Tough love? But there is a time to listen and hear what is going on. Thank god I did. He let me handle things mostly. Not that I did everything perfect but they know they are loved and work towards better things. It’s a process. click to expandclick to expand
Posted by NemDeux@NemDeux
Dear Ijeawele, or A Feminist Manifesto in Fifteen Suggestions
By CHIMAMANDA NGOZI ADICHIE
a must read for parents!! imo.
I just ordered it from Book Depository, it was only just over a fiver! Do you shop there at all? Great selection and free postage
👍
Posted by NemDeuxThought you did!Posted by MyStarsShinePosted by NemDeux
Dear Ijeawele, or A Feminist Manifesto in Fifteen Suggestions
By CHIMAMANDA NGOZI ADICHIE
a must read for parents!! imo.
@NemDeux
I just ordered it from Book Depository, it was only just over a fiver! Do you shop there at all? Great selection and free postage
👍 click to expand
you will breeze through it! i got it for my best friend! let me know your thoughts on it.
re book depository::all the time lol. 😂 click to expandclick to expand
Will do.....thanks again 🙂
Kids...change your life, no matter what you did or think, they do
People think my cappy daughter is my little sister... to be honest she does not even act like I’m his mother
But with nana.. it’s different.. I know this is wired but it’s the truth.. I love both of them, but in a very different way.
The hardest was my son.... will my son is another story, god bless his soul.
Posted by HaruukaYour beautiful girls ❤️❤️. What sign is the baby?
Kids...change your life, no matter what you did or think, they do
People think my cappy daughter is my little sister... to be honest she does not even act like I’m his mother
But with nana.. it’s different.. I know this is wired but it’s the truth.. I love both of them, but in a very different way.
The hardest was my son.... will my son is another story, god bless his soul.
You have had.a son? Do you want to talk about him?
(((Haruuka)))
Xx
Posted by MyStarsShineNo, I don’t wanna talk about him.Posted by Haruuka
Kids...change your life, no matter what you did or think, they do
People think my cappy daughter is my little sister... to be honest she does not even act like I’m his mother
But with nana.. it’s different.. I know this is wired but it’s the truth.. I love both of them, but in a very different way.
The hardest was my son.... will my son is another story, god bless his soul.
Your beautiful girls ❤️❤️. What sign is the baby?
You have had.a son? Do you want to talk about him?
(((Haruuka)))
Xx click to expandclick to expand
Star xxx 💘
Posted by HaruukaNo problem love ❤️ xxxxPosted by MyStarsShinePosted by Haruuka
Kids...change your life, no matter what you did or think, they do
People think my cappy daughter is my little sister... to be honest she does not even act like I’m his mother
But with nana.. it’s different.. I know this is wired but it’s the truth.. I love both of them, but in a very different way.
The hardest was my son.... will my son is another story, god bless his soul.
Your beautiful girls ❤️❤️. What sign is the baby?
You have had.a son? Do you want to talk about him?
(((Haruuka)))
Xx click to expand
No, I don’t wanna talk about him.
Star xxx 💘 click to expandclick to expand
Sweet little darling ❤️😍💕
So cute 😍
So there is a parenting forum. And peeps been telling me it’d be a horrible idea when they were posting here months ago.
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@_@
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:)
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1. @Scruffles
2. @xoxflute
3. @squishy_marshmallow
4. @DeleterNerd
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I think it has something to do with aliens, that they are sending us a signal or something and they want us to look into 1
🌟There is nothing better in life
Then to hear a child's laughter🌟
*~*❤️*~*