Pisces guy is toturing me!!!!!!!

I went out with this awesome pisces guy... I think he still has feeling for his ex but he swear to me thats over !!! He is soo reserved , always thinking ... and I talk too much ... but he was always sooo romatic and nice with me.... he say he will call but he never did ... its been a few days now.. he said he wanted to spend time with me soon... but nothing yet.. im worried something happened to him or maybe he just dont care about me anymore he was sooooo into me before: texting, listening to my music, calling me, talking for hours.... and suddenly he is gone!!! He said his family is in town... I do believe that.. but not even 1 min to text— He also told me he wanted a latina girl , he is white... so thats me ... he called me beautiful.. sexy all this things... and now he won't even ask how i am doing... I dont text him unless he does ... and i am not planning on answering his call if he ever calls.. i am not used to men doing this to me I think i deserve better... he is the first pisces i ever dated .. and it seems they are all like that... i just rather to know if he is into me or not so I dont wait for him and move one...
Any advice is appreciated !!

I am a cancer girl

Whoa girl. First thing.. slowwwww down a notch. You went out with him, had a good time. But you're both still in the casual dating, just getting to know each other stage atill. So don't get all clingy and caught up in it, because you're coming across as desperate and needy, which is going to make the poor guy back off as soon as he DOES contact you. And another thing... women are handicapping themselves with that "I'm not gonna answer his calls" bullshit. That's a GAME. Don't play games. No, DO NOT chase him and/or blow his phone up... give him the space he needs (esp as a Pisces!)... but don't be all petty and resentful when he DOES get back to you.

He's got family things going on, you said? He's probably emotionally tapped, drained. His psychic sponge has likely absorbed a whole lot of other peoples' negative energies, leaving him with very little left to give right now. Be patient, let him find his center again. (If you can't handle this, you two will never make it!!) So what do you do instead of thinking about him? First, stop worrying and obsessing, it's messing up YOUR vibe. Go out and do something that makes YOU happy and content. Go out with that cute guy who flirted with you at Starbuck's. Go out with friends. Get a haircut or a mani/pedi. Buy a new pair of shoes. Read a book you've been putting off for a month. Join a gym. Start a new hobby. Rent a movie you wanted to see. Take a walk in the park. Plant some flowers. Get a facial. Buy a fab new lipgloss to match this really cute sundress you're going to get. See where I'm going with this?

You are spending waaaay too much time and energy worrying over this... YOU need to find your center again, so that you're a happy, secure, well-centered chica when he calls again. And it's not HIS job to make you happy, to conform his (minor and normal) behaviors to fit the emotional needs (wants?) of a girl he just met. Getting happy is YOUR job, any man will be overwhelmed by the task, and freak out. This guy has done nothing that I see as alarming... he's got other responsibilities to deal with right now, and it's only been a few days.

Chillax, sweetie. Keep it moving along nicely by not investing yourself so heavily into him so soon, cuz that will freak him out and make him step back way more than needing a few days for family.

thanks!! believe i have a lot going on in my life.. working on my masters and working full time... im very smart when it comes to guys.. but this one i like too much... and he is adding more stress to my life now.. so i feel like dumping him if he ever calls again... 😢 I a m a cancer i am way too sensitive sometimes and I hate admitting that...We didnt not only went out... more things happened ... basically acting like bf and gf but I really want to tell him i like him but he wont even give me a clue of whats happenign with him ... i am not a stalker .. lol i just want to know whats going on ... so much for my little heart..

I just want to tell him to be straight-forward with me... and believe me i am ready to hear him say he just played with me and had fun and thats all!!! id rather the truth than living a lie.. believe me Ianthefish.. i think is funny when happens to other people .. but if i knew pisces guy were like this I never even get involved with him to start with.

Ian's one of our resident Pisces Males.. and he's quite adept and unafraid to call bullshit when someone's trying to pull it. And I tend to agree with him here.. you're NOT wanting to "dump" him if he ever calls again. You're wanting him to call, to reassure you that he likes you as much as you like him, you want him to do something to make you happy and secure again about how your "relationship" (for lack of a better word) is going. That's NOT a gonna dump him mentality. You're not being your real and true and authentic self - it's not how you really feel. You're really feeling ignored and hurt and desperate to know that you aren't way more into this "great guy" than he is you.. you're looking for reassurance and validation (from an outside source!) and feeling put out because you aren't getting it.

Please re-read what I said. It's YOUR job to get YOU happy, not HIS! Happy, relaxed, secure, non-needy non-clingy women attract men like the flame attracts the moth. He might not know WHY, but he wants more of being around this really great girl, she's not like other women he's met (and is probably getting tired of!) Shift your vibe, girl, and draw him in by not trying so hard, by not worrying and thinking and obsessing. Get busy in your life, ENJOY your life. A man wants to be PART of a wonderful woman's life, but he doesn't want to be the CENTER, and the sole source of her happiness and reassurance. It's too much to put on a guy, it really is.

to be honest I have no clue..I dont think he is playing.. cause he even wanted to meet my family the first day we met... and he was very patient with me ... and last thing ive heard is that he has a lot of work and family things...i also know he has a crazy ex that texts him all the time... he said he has no girlfriend now but i saw him texting her... I just dont want to put myself in a situation where I have to wait for a guy or calling him all the time or texting him...I usually have guys asking me out every weekend ( not to be cocky but I think guys find me attractive) As a pisces guy what do you think I should do? Wait?

Thanks Nefer ... i appreciate your words... is hard for a cancer girl to relax!!! I get overwhelmed with every little issue in my life!!!

Also, read this very carefully: You went out. "More" stuff happened. (Maybe you mean sex?) You've been acting like bf/gf. Now get ready to wrap your mind around this: YOU ARE NOT BF/GF UNTIL IT'S VERY, VERY CLEAR THAT YOU ARE. No matter how it FEELS to you, an imaginary relationship is not a relationship. It's like you just pushed that fast forward button and you're on Step 12 and he's still back at Step Three, cuz he's taking his time. And if you slept together, that's one way that MANY women get too emotionally invested in a man too quickly. Usually it's NOT that the guy wanted to fuck & run.. usually it's that the woman CHANGED after the sex, she got more emotionally invested than him, started having all of these overwhelming feelings and was unconsciously putting pressure on him. Even if a girl ACTS "cool" and like it's "no big deal"... guys feel the truth underneath, when her insides say loud and clear: I'm SO into you that I want to push this very quickly into something serious and solid. I don't want to take my time, and I don't want YOU to take your time. I want what I want and I want it right now AND YOU'RE GOING TO GIVE IT TO ME! Your whole vibe shifts to being WAY more into him, and way needy and clingy and wanting something he's not sure he's ready for yet. And when a girl is PRETENDING to be all "cool" and "nonchalant" but is a writhing mass of neediness and insecurities and expectations underneath.. the Inside doesn't match the Outside.. and WILL turn a guy off like a switch! Never, ever ACT or PRETEND with a man... always be your real and true and honest self, just check the drama at the door. And honey - "I want to break up with him when he calls, because he didn't call for several days"? That's DRAMA. Just don't do it, it's not really and truly what you're feeling.

Nefer you seem pretty wise one these things... we never had sex ... thats the truth.. I met him online and we talked for weeks!!!! He said he will visit me for the weekend... he was such a gentleman... the first night we did have a lot of foreplay but no sex ... next night we fell asleep while watching a movie.. and the last night not even close to any action... I found this strange since Ive never really spend the night with any guy without him trying to even touch me!! I felt a little rejected ( i felt like he didnt sleep with me but with his sister!! ) ... but i didnt tell him ... the nnext morning he was still the sweet romantic guy of the other days... Is that a sign he does not like me?

*laughs* You know I think you're a doll, Ian... but you know you're going to come across as a prick to a lot of people, right? I know you're not a prick.. I know you're just goggle-eyed and frustrated at the crazy emotional antics and mental acrobatics of an over-invested woman who is not seeing things clearly. *loves*


No, lichii, it's NOT a sign that he doesn't like you. It's a sign that he's taking it slow, getting to know you, still having a LITTLE fun, but taking it slow. It's a sign of RESPECT when a man doesn't demand to get into your pants when he barely knows you.

Cancer girl, this Pisces man is NOT sending you mixed signals or playing any games that I can see. YOU are obsessing, worrying, and over-analyzing every tiny detail, however. STOP. Go paint your toenails. Take a long bubble bath. Highlight your hair. Wax your legs. Paint a picture. Write a love letter to yourself. And BREATHE. Slow down and breathe.

This seems like a good guy... don't turn him into a bad one by clinging so tightly your knuckles turn white. Hold on loosely. Live your life and INVITE him to come share it with you by changing this dark, clingy, needy vibe into something more relaxed and positive. He'll love it!

I know Ian... I finally understanding what you mean by "treetrunking" LOL. thanks for the insight!

Sorry English is not my first language... so the slang is still hard to understand for me...

If you're seeing "treetrunks" (LOL) then your Profanity filter is set to On. If you want it OFF (knowing that you will see the REAL swear words and not the funny "cookiemonsters" and "treetrunks" and "markers" they replace the words with)... go to Settings.. Edit Profile... way down at the bottom.. there's a place to turn it off 🙂

haha no biggies!!

Thanks Kaleidescorp44. I know patience is not one of my virtues!!

Posted by Kaleidescorp44
They march to the beat of a different drummer. To give you an example: Let's say he just had the thought to give you a call, then his mom or sister calls him into another room saying they need help with something. Instantly, his mind is no longer on the thought that he needs to give you a call. It is totally focused on what his mom or sister needed help with. He's totally forgotten that he needed to call you.

naaa...none of that shyt is true

if the guy REALLY likes her, he'd still take some time out from whatever he's doin to call her..at least i would..who the hell just "forgets" that quick?? you talkin like we got "ADD" or sum shyt..

thats true damen, I just dont put my expectations too high with him anymore... cause he might not call anymore!

1 week :/

he used to call me evryday.. texted me everyday...until last holiday weekend that we spent 3 days together...he texted that we should meet again... told me family was in town and thats all.. i lost all contact with him

Posted by DAMEN VI

Posted by Kaleidescorp44
They march to the beat of a different drummer. To give you an example: Let's say he just had the thought to give you a call, then his mom or sister calls him into another room saying they need help with something. Instantly, his mind is no longer on the thought that he needs to give you a call. It is totally focused on what his mom or sister needed help with. He's totally forgotten that he needed to call you.

naaa...none of that shyt is true

if the guy REALLY likes her, he'd still take some time out from whatever he's doin to call her..at least i would..who the hell just "forgets" that quick?? you talkin like we got "ADD" or sum shyt..

click to expand

This is both true and false. And in this area, not calling (getting distracted and busy) is more Pisces - and you insisting you would call a girl you barely know is probably some other Fire or Air placements you have, because you aren't typical in this respect.

What we need to remember here is that these two are barely starting out in a budding relationship. They are NOT a couple yet. If they'd been going out for awhile and in a committed relationship, YES, she becomes a top priority and he will make time to call/txt even when pressured and busy with other stuff. But right now, they hung out one weekend (their first face to face meeting) and now he's got family in town. She doesn't know this Pisces guy that well, doesn't know how HIS family dynamics work. (For example, if it were MY family in town, things can get so stressful that I just want to buckle down and get through the "wonderful" family visit, and I wouldn't have much mental energy left over for chatting with someone I like but barely know. My energy will go to surviving my real life issues right then.)

Also, he might be feeling.. uhh.. sheepish for not calling. This magic phenomenon happens with lots of guys - they got busy, didn't call. Then they realize it's been a few days.. and uh oh.. she's probably gonna be pissed. So then he has to decide.. risk facing her anger and disapproval by calling while he's still dealing with family and won't be able to do anything to truly "make up for" not calling.. or wait a few days until things settle down, and hope she misses him enough that she'll be happy to hear from him rather than bre

breathing fire cuz he didn't call. It's not that men are chickens.. but disapproval really hurts them. They'll put off a potentially volatile confrontation as long as possible, ESP if he really likes her (which he seems to!)

My advice is still valid, lichii... lean back, relax, stop stressin'. He'll call, but you need to get YOU busy and get your mind off this merry go round obsession about him not calling.

Posted by ianthefish
i think Kaleidescorp is right...

i also think damen is right....

i say that, because i do get distracted by other things, and tend to push the old stuff back like she was saying... i dont get all distracted as in having ADD tho.... maybe just a one track mind... multi tasking? forget about it...

as damen says tho if he likes you he will call.... and id never forget to keep in touch with a new broad... thats when its critical to be assertive...

Really? A chick you met one weekend, and NOW your crazy family is in town? He TOLD her his family was in town and he'd be busy. It's been a WEEK, not a MONTH.

And maybe he's not as assertive as you, Ian? 😛 We don't know his other placements. Hell, we don't even know if he's a sheep in wolf's clothing yet. SHE barely knows him, and WE know even less about him 😛

Posted by ianthefish
doesnt matter what i do...

Cuz you're still an asshole either way? Damned if you do, damned if you don't! 😉

Pffft.. You know I think you're pretty awesome, Ian. I think most Pisces are pretty cool, cuz I just seem to GET them (duh!) I just meant that the.. erm.. unenlightened .. tend to stare blankly at your responses and completely miss the point (ZOOOOM - like a 747 flying overhead) and just dismiss you as an "asshole" 😛

And you, Mister... you are not your typical, average guy anyway. You KNOW this! lol

get rid of him. you can find a better pisces guy if that's your thing

Posted by Nefer

Posted by ianthefish
.

Really? A chick you met one weekend, and NOW your crazy family is in town? He TOLD her his family was in town and he'd be busy. It's been a WEEK, not a MONTH.

click to expand

but he use to call her everyday..then after they spent a few days with each other...he stopped..i think that would affect any woman to an extent..you'd definetly wonder, reguardless if his family in town or not..cuz honestly, it sound like sum bullshyt..

you know what i think—i think he hit it...and quit it, point blank.

Thanks for your comments... I dont know I am just living my life... is the very first time this happens to me...I never had to wait for a guy to call me 😢 Maybe because i really like him and he made himself sooo appealing to me...he didnt really hit it with me.. we just hung out and had a great time... and maybe i made myself many ideas in my head about us building a relationship.. lesson learned!

Thanks Peri Peri I Havent heard this song in ages!

Kaleidescorp44 , believe thats a possibility... i thought about it a lot. Maybe he just used me for a weekend as a way to get away from his relationship problems. I know he was with a girl back home and that she was very jelous. He didnt like that and told me they were not together anymore and that its been more than 6 months of that. But i saw a text message from her so he either stills is trying to solve things with her or he is just being a nice guy and texting her back.I just will hate the idea that he spent soo much time romancing me, telling me all these beautiful things amd spending time with me just to have me hanging there— is that what men do? they spent time and money to have a girl fall for them and then leave them hanging there?

Or maybe is just karma... I am guilty of doing this before and I recreated myself with guys that liked me when I was depressed/ssd in the past. I guess i got a taste of my own medicine... 😢

I just have the feeling he will come back one day and be like nothing happened!! I hope im with somebody else by then .. 🙂

Thanks kaleideskorp44 the more I hear ur words the more calmed I get about this whole situation 🙂 I really like him but better times will come!!

Thanks kaleideskorp44 the more I hear ur words the more calmed I get about this whole situation 🙂 I really like him but better times will come!!

Posted by lichii
( i felt like he didnt sleep with me but with his sister!! )

What

Posted by Arm a Gettin

Posted by lichii
( i felt like he didnt sleep with me but with his sister!! )

What

click to expand

LOL Arm... I believe she meant that she was wondering why he wasn't "making moves" on her sexually (esp after their first night of fooling around a bit), treating her more like his "sister" (in her mind) than a sexy girl he met a few weeks ago online, and then spent a weekend with in person. He didn't have sex with her, didn't really try very hard, but was still sweet, romantic, and tender otherwise... but it's new for her. She's a very attractive woman (clearly) and this is probably the first guy who took it slow with her physically, even when she was clearly into him and probably willing to go further.

LOL Nefer you r awesome.. i couldn't put it in better words...writing is not one of my skills. 😛

yeh nefer is remarkable

but you know something is wrong when theres too much emphasis on the guy and not about the girl.
U need a man with fire in his loins thats gonna pick u up and hammer u sideways in an alley way...

this is not what its like with pisces men and I hate it....I know its not theyre fault they have special needs. Your first instinct is that you have to tip toe around them.....but then u musnt cos they pick up on games

such is life that we all dont see eye to eye and its a comfort to know that nefer is keeping it real.

do you know what the best feeling is? being pursued by a hot aries man...... ~oh my jesus~

u r right The_eleventh_sign_11 Aries guys have that character I like... but i am down for romance rather than chasing..😄

seems like u got alot more chasing ahead of u...or should i say no chasing more like waiting....and waiting...then the phone rings two weeks later and hide ur brusied ego and play it cool. Then you hang out with him and you cant help but expect alot from him because hes been keeping u waiting for two weeks but still hes treating u like a sister. Its not going as fast as u wanted and then ur stuck acting like his friend and u dont know if he still thinks about his when of course he does cos hes a pisces all of a sudden u feel inferior and you dont know how to play sexy anymore and its driving me crazy!!!!!!! ooops when did this start to be about me.....Nefer!!!!!

theres supposed to be an ex i there somewhere ......... dont mind me Ive done my head in thinking about pisces when in actual fact its really easy apparently but for some reason I dont get it......I like rules I like guidelines because if u follow them things go smoothly but u just have to feel your way with these guys and thats something I personally have to devlop thats why i pursue as many piscean guys as i can till i get it.

My brand of genius comes from being OLD and having WAY too many experiences with the.. erm.. Human Condition. People are friggin' crazy, but I've had many years to observe them. Fascinating species.

😉

And YOU, Eleventh.. believe it or not, I DO like you, despite that what you think of Pisces in general is at times unfair and unflattering... though that might be my Airy influence from my Aqua/Pisces cusp. But MAN, sweetie... whenever "Pisces" or esp "Pisces Man" is mentioned, you KNOW your mind jumps back to that ex of yours and that huge fiasco! Where's your Aqua objectivity? Though you only seem to be "too close" to the situation and lacking objectivity when it comes to HIM (and by association, most Pisces). You need to meet a better Pisces to turn your mind around. It could happen.. look at Sorti and Bling (two of the MOST and longtime ANTI-PISCES guys on DXP!) getting their Karmic and just rewards -- falling for Pisces womn! lol

But I still say that him respecting her enough to not have sex with her SO SOON doesn't mean he's weak or doesn't have fire in his loins. YES, sometimes we chicas like to just be POUNCED and TAKEN DAMNIT! But that's generally if we're only looking for mindless hot monkey lovin'... or in an already established relationship. She really LIKES this guy, and thinks she'd like more with him... so his gently tapping the brakes (you KNOW it wasn't HER - she was baffled! lol) is actually better in the long run, esp to a woman already getting this emotionally vested. Can you IMAGINE the hot mess she'd be if he HAD slept with her?! :o

So long as that wasn't reference to my advanced age, whippersnapper 😉

mmmmm hot mess.......lol yeh I get u....... Your pisces aquarian?? I always thought u were a scorpio for some reason....

are u in a relationship right now?

do you get lonely knowing all the shit you know?

are u like a teacher when u get into a relationship with a man if so do u hate being the one who teaches the guy?

are you an astrologer?



so much to learnabout piscean guys never a dull moment.....need the paitence for that damn phone call! 🙂

Yup, February 20th is one crazy day to be born. Scorp, eh? Nope, I have NO other Water in my chart, aside from my Pisces placements - not even in the lesser-known planets. Which I found amusing. Lotta Earth in key placements, quite a bit of Air. I even think I technically have more Fire than Water LOL

I'm in a longterm relationship with a Libra man. Well, we technically broke up in February -- but since then, he's turned himself around and is now doing everything he can to get me back "officially"... so if I were to finally "give in" (lol), I'd be in a relationship with him. (Though the Pisces here KNOW that actually means I'm still with him in my heart. It's coming, I'm just very stubborn.) And I'm really enjoying his pursuit and his determination to win my trust back - he's finally cherishing me and showing me what I mean to him. And no, I'm not mean or vindictive - he's not suffering, and actually says he's enjoying me more and falling deeper all the time. I'm warm, open, receptive, feminine, vulnerable... it's not any sort of "punishment" or "payback" and our relationship NOW is more fun and less work. I really love that, too.

Do I get lonely? Everyone does, I suppose. But generally, no. I love me, I love life, and I love living. I experience everything fully, good AND bad. I am open to all possibilities, closed off to none, willing and unafraid to take risks. Do I feel like an odd duck sometimes? Sure, I guess. I'm more "like" some DXPers here than I'm like ANYONE I know in real life. Keeps me coming back.

If I'm a teacher in relationships, it's that I teach them to open to possibilities and things they never thought of. I'm the Catalyst so often in my life, with so many people. My Libra says I'm as deep as an ocean, and calls himself a puddle. But from my influence, I've watched him become more in touch and in tune with his emotions, not just his Airy thoughts. He's changed a lot since we met (friends are flabbergasted), but I never tried to change him, I just watched his growth and evolution with awe and fascination and love, always love. True acceptance tends to trigger personal growth.

I'm not an astrologer, but have been into this since I was maybe 10 or 11 - always learning new stuff - it's HUGE! But it's just a GUIDE to any number of POSSIBILITIES, not carved in stone.

Posted by ianthefish
nefer you were only 10 when i was born...

I know. But I think your wife is cuter 😉

I look 10 or 15 years younger than I am, and sometimes feel 1,000 years older than I am. My Mom says I was an "old soul" even when I was very young. Always observing, taking it all in. Happy, but quiet. Peaceful. Mysterious, very Zen. And a complete bafflement to almost everyone who ever knew me. I feel like I've found my kith and kin here on DXP.

Oh ur an aquarian...that explains it then lol

so have u been with many pisces men? dont u and ian have it off sometimes?

i havent slept since yesterday and I just finished digging up feral bamboo for mum in the backyard and im feeling weally frag
and when i stay up long i go weird.

hence why i been a cranky bitch on here 🙂

I dunno what I am, really. Pisces in traditional Astrology, but just barely. Aqua in Sidereal, but with my Pisces Sun/Rising/Mercury... I'm a Pisces with heavy Aqua influence. Or an Aqua with a lot of Pisces in key placements. I looked at my (profile posted) planets again... 4 Pisces placements, 4 Taurus (and a Cap), 4 Libra (and two more Aqua), 4 Aries (and a Leo and a Sag). No wonder I've found myself with Virgos (my so-called opposite!) so shockingly often, more Earth than Water! And my best relationship is with a Libra... I've got more Air than Water, and I'm "channeling" Aqua traits from the cusp and Sidereal anyway! And I'm no "passive" or "weak" or "wishy-washy" (and mind you, those MISCONCEPTIONS and GENERALIZATIONS really bother me!) Down-streaming Pisces... too much Fire for that. *laughs* Faaaaaaascinating!

I honestly can't recall even one Pisces man I've been in a serious relationship with. A few attractions or crushes, sure - they're very magnetic! Friends, always friends. Lots of Pisces friends, male and female. We just CLICK. As for Ian, not sure what you mean by "have it off sometimes"... he's adorable and sweet, but he's married to a very smokin' hot and smart Virgo gal, and I'm no poacher - even if I wanted a younger man! LOL but Ian and I are just friends, and we generally "GET" each other instinctively, with no effort at all. (We have some similar placements as well.)

Posted by lichii

... and i am not planning on answering his call if he ever calls..

You lost me right here.



Out

LOl thats just the way I usually act with guys P-Angel...i usually want to give that sense of " I am too busy for you right now" I sually call back after a few hours... 🙂 To be honest i really want him to call but he havent called yet...