Libra Women - one min hot/next min cold HELP!!!

Hi guys,

Never used anything like this before so please bear with me.

I was up until 5 weeks ago dating a Libra girl. We have known each other for a long time but the timing was just never there for anything to happen. All of sudden we found out from mutual friends we both really liked each other (both single btw) and I finally asked her out. Honestly from the moment go it was the best thing i have experienced in terms of dating. we went on some great dates, never had an awkward moment, had huge chemistry in bed and it was great. She came on pretty strong and was saying stuff like "you're my perfect guy" and all that general stuff. being a Pisces man i thought this great however was trying to keep my feet on the floor which was tough at times.

Anyway out of no where she ended it saying she was so confused about if she could be in a relationship atm, thought she had to be single to sort her self out but was scared by making this decision she was throwing a possible great future with me. obviously i was majorly confused how she could one minute be all loving and over me then saying she cant be with me right now.

I was very mature about the whole thing and said i respected her decision even though it was a shock and upsetting but wanted to show her i care for her enough to not try and be controlling and let her make decision instead of me forcing my feelings on her.

She then rang me a couple weeks later saying she really wanted to see me and missed me but once we met it was all "i'm so glad to see you but i've not changed my mind...i still need to be single". I explained she cant use me for when she's having a lonely day etc and that we should have no contact whatsoever until she's got a clearer head and knows what she wants. I explained i care deeply for her but will not hang around just incase she changes her mind.

So after all the rambling my question is...Is forcing this no contact rule on a Libra women a good idea? Will my show of self respect (ie not waiting for her) make her second guess her decision to end things.

BTW i know some of you may be thinking "Mate maybe she just didnt fancy you" etc but trust me we had such an amazing time together and that is why i find myself on this board for some advice.

Thanks guys

shes hedging her bets. you got the right idea and not letting her use you for a lonely day.

Hi

thanks for the comments. One thing I forgot to mention was when she originally ended it she said very clearly that there was no one else at all in the picture.

I know obviously she could of just said that to not hurt my feelings (im not stupid with these thingd) but i didn't even raise the subject of someone else being in the picture and I honestly believe her when she said.

As i said i'm not going to hang around and be at her side every time she is having a bad day but i just wondered if there was a certain way to play this with her being a Libra and i know they can be extremely indecisive.

libra suns and moons, imo, are indecisive only when they feel like they are being pulled in different directions. in this case, 2 people.

Posted by Northern505
Hi guys,
Never used anything like this before so please bear with me.
I was up until 5 weeks ago dating a Libra girl. We have known each other for a long time but the timing was just never there for anything to happen. All of sudden we found out from mutual friends we both really liked each other (both single btw) and I finally asked her out. Honestly from the moment go it was the best thing i have experienced in terms of dating. we went on some great dates, never had an awkward moment, had huge chemistry in bed and it was great. She came on pretty strong and was saying stuff like "you're my perfect guy" and all that general stuff. being a Pisces man i thought this great however was trying to keep my feet on the floor which was tough at times.
Anyway out of no where she ended it saying she was so confused about if she could be in a relationship atm, thought she had to be single to sort her self out but was scared by making this decision she was throwing a possible great future with me. obviously i was majorly confused how she could one minute be all loving and over me then saying she cant be with me right now.

I was very mature about the whole thing and said i respected her decision even though it was a shock and upsetting but wanted to show her i care for her enough to not try and be controlling and let her make decision instead of me forcing my feelings on her.

She then rang me a couple weeks later saying she really wanted to see me and missed me but once we met it was all "i'm so glad to see you but i've not changed my mind...i still need to be single". I explained she cant use me for when she's having a lonely day etc and that we should have no contact whatsoever until she's got a clearer head and knows what she wants. I explained i care deeply for her but will not hang around just incase she changes her mind. So after all the rambling my question is...Is forcing this no contact rule on a Libra women a good idea? Will my show of self respect (ie not waiting for her) make her second guess her decision to end things.BTW i know some of you may be thinking "Mate maybe she just didnt fancy you" etc but trust me we had such an amazing time together and that is why i find myself on this board for some advice.Thanks guys

How old is she?

im 30 shes 26

If I were really feeling someone, there is no way in hell I would pull a stunt like this....unless something occurred, like you displayed a bad trait (anger, aggression). I think she is playing a game with you. She wants you to chase her, show her she's the one you want to be with. Sounds kind of immature. Or as a previous poster said, someone else is in the picture.

Depending on her traits, the silent treatment could go either way. In the end, do you, stand on your morals. If she's worth her salt, she'll be back.

Posted by Northern505
im 30 shes 26

Okay then..Well, here it is...More than likely, someone else is in the picture. Sorry to say, but that is usually a sure sign. I have no doubt she does really likes you, but she's confused and not sure if she wants to be with you or the other person. I can almost guarantee you that's the deal.
Now, her rising and moon signs will also have a lot to do with her personality, but speaking from experience as an older Libra, the only time I would not totally committ to someone one, was if there was another person in the picture or if I was not feeling you and obviously she's feeling you because she keeps coming back. If a Libra has no interest in you, she will keep it moving. Unfortunately for you, that's the IMBALANCE side of the Libra.

However, as for you, DO NOT...and I mean...DO NOT put up with that foolishness. Give her an ultimatum and make it clear that you really like her, but you will NOT run behind nor play her games and walk the hell off!! Leave her standing or sitting where she is. Libra's love a challenging man, so give her a challenge. That's if you want too...If you don't, then I say keep it moving.
Never allow someone to make you their alternative while you make them their your priority. You're worthy of better🙂

Posted by MissLibra
If I were really feeling someone, there is no way in hell I would pull a stunt like this....unless something occurred, like you displayed a bad trait (anger, aggression). I think she is playing a game with you. She wants you to chase her, show her she's the one you want to be with. Sounds kind of immature. Or as a previous poster said, someone else is in the picture.

Depending on her traits, the silent treatment could go either way. In the end, do you, stand on your morals. If she's worth her salt, she'll be back.

+1000

Poor you! Libra women are tough to understand and tough to be made happy. And yes, you just describe her perfectly, hot one minute and cold the next. That is her indecisive showing. They are not proud of it by the way. You're not the only one being fooled by them. They fool everybody. Well....you are right to let her sort herself out. Oh and just so you know for future reference, when you tell a Libra girl to sort things out, you actually just pissed her off. They are narcissistic, manipulative and indecisive.

Posted by VirgoDragirl
Poor you! Libra women are tough to understand and tough to be made happy. And yes, you just describe her perfectly, hot one minute and cold the next. That is her indecisive showing. They are not proud of it by the way. You're not the only one being fooled by them. They fool everybody. Well....you are right to let her sort herself out. Oh and just so you know for future reference, when you tell a Libra girl to sort things out, you actually just pissed her off. They are narcissistic, manipulative and indecisive.

What—? Why in the hell does she have to be narcissistic and manipulative?? Indecisive, yes...Confused as shyt..maybe...I give you that, but how in the fuc $ did this turn into a "LIBRA GIRL" issue? As if you know every Libra female to be this way. There's nothing difficult about me to understand and it damn sure doesn't take a lot to make me happy even when I was 26 years old, so STOP generalizing and get in a corner somewhere!! I swear..simple azz folks can always take a conversation and twist it. I won't even get started on what I think about Virgo women..there isn't enough time in the day.

@Lib4Life: Careful there....your Narcissistic showing. This is not about you.

Posted by VirgoDragirl
@Lib4Life: Careful there....your Narcissistic showing. This is not about you.

@VirgoDragirl, I can't tell "IT'S NOT JUST ABOUT ME".
Using words like THEY and THEM isssssssssss making a broad statement about all Libra women since you're the one that stated "Libra girls/women", but careful there......I guess that means YOUR narrow minded and over analyzing personality is showing. You may want to take note that I said YOUR since I don't believe in generalizing. I have a Virgo sibling and I would never make the statement that all Virgo's are alike because I don't interact with every Virgo. Maybe the Libra GIRLS you've come across is that way, but I doubt that too.

@Northern505

I am a Libran and recently cut off someone who I really really really liked. I would go far as to say I was falling for. I cut it off because I liked him so so much but I didn't feel he liked me as much. Maybe he did, maybe he didn't, either way, I ended it because I didn't want to get hurt.

I know some people have advised you there maybe someone else in the picture but in my situation there was no one but him. It was very early days and I could sense him wanting to hurry into a relationship and get closer but I couldn't go at that pace. He was sending mixed signals, wanting a relationship but my instincts were telling me something was off.

A tiny part of me regrets it, but actually it made me realise I need complete security that the other is mine and only mine, if not, then they need someone who has a slower pace.

The things your Libran said to you about how she felt sounds genuine. Why would she meet you and waste your time if she didn't like you? Maybe she reflected on how things would work long term and was being mature and cautious stating she is not ready for a relationship.

For me, I will only commit when I know 100% they adore me back, any less then I start to take it slower and if they cant slow down.

If you like her, be patient.

@venusinscorpiolady

Thanks very much for your kind words. Everything you said does ring very true. It was all very intense, very quickly which was as much of a shock to me as it was to her.

Can I asked one more question - i'm doing ok now. i'm old enough and mature enough to deal with this situation. I do really respect her wishes to sort things out on her own and i know if we did carry on chatting as 'friends' then the chance of her missing me and what we had will fade away quickly but after reading your message i've realised that even I made it clear I liked her a lot maybe I never did tell her just how much I have fallen for her.

We have a party coming up in around 5 weeks which we are both going to be at and my plan is to not contact her at all until that night and get on with my life but if I still have these extremely strong feelings for her then I want to explain to her in detail just how she makes me feel and how she is everything I have ever wanted in a women but in a mature and articulate way. Im not going to try and persuade her, be desperate or needy to take me back or manipulate her feelings but purely tell her how amazing she is in every way just so she knows.

i personally believe sometimes in life you've got throw away your pride and just put yourself out there.

i guess what i'm asking is would this be a good idea?


I'm well aware that this could massively backfire on me but I would regret it for he rest of my life if I didnt.

Thanks guys

i wouldnt be too pleased of you were talking to me and stopped and then i see you at a party and all of a sudden you have a lot to say—?

you would come across a bit...confusing. it wouldnt make me get closer to you. it would have the opposite effect.

but then again, im not a libra. im just a woman.

maybe i should of explained it in a bit more detail.

We agreed that we would have no contact (my wish after she has a couple of times rang me when a bit drunk or lonely) until the party where we would have a good chat about us and see where our heads are at. so we both have time to get our heads straight and she can hopefully figure out what she wants,

It was a mutual decision with us both knowing the subject of 'us' is going to come up.

When a libra truly is into you, they give you their all. I find that when I like someone but dont foresee a future I skirt around in telling them that to spare their feelings and continue to talk to them regardless of how I feel. It is unfair yes. Libras LOVE having options and admirers and HATE restrictions. No contact will definitely work and make her wonder about you, maybe something she did wrong...but on the same note when a libra finds that magic person, they would want to restrict them. Hope it works out for you!

i agreed to VirgoDragirl: Libra woman are narcissistic. desperate to get admiration they do whatever they can to get their own way as become so manipulative. i encountered these bitches and i can see behind their facade. true true true.

Posted by Northern505
@venusinscorpiolady

Thanks very much for your kind words. Everything you said does ring very true. It was all very intense, very quickly which was as much of a shock to me as it was to her.

Can I asked one more question - i'm doing ok now. i'm old enough and mature enough to deal with this situation. I do really respect her wishes to sort things out on her own and i know if we did carry on chatting as 'friends' then the chance of her missing me and what we had will fade away quickly but after reading your message i've realised that even I made it clear I liked her a lot maybe I never did tell her just how much I have fallen for her.

We have a party coming up in around 5 weeks which we are both going to be at and my plan is to not contact her at all until that night and get on with my life but if I still have these extremely strong feelings for her then I want to explain to her in detail just how she makes me feel and how she is everything I have ever wanted in a women but in a mature and articulate way. Im not going to try and persuade her, be desperate or needy to take me back or manipulate her feelings but purely tell her how amazing she is in every way just so she knows.

i personally believe sometimes in life you've got throw away your pride and just put yourself out there.

i guess what i'm asking is would this be a good idea?


I'm well aware that this could massively backfire on me but I would regret it for he rest of my life if I didnt.

Thanks guys

I think your plan is a great idea. The party is in 5 weeks which gives you enough time to review your feelings and if they are the same, speaking to her about how u feel will give both of you an understanding about how the other feels. Plus the way she reacts and responds will give you the answer you are looking for.

I completely agree with throwing away your pride and being honest with ones feelings.

Recently someone who I had pushed away because I feared he was a player opened up to me about his feelings and it has brought us together, things are going really well even though I nearly messed things up. In the past I have put my feelings out there and been rejected and yes it hurt so much, but my head was clear, none of this does he like me or not bs.

People have different opinions on here but I'm not keen on the idea of basing someone completely on their s

Sun sign