Farts

This topic was created in the Relationships forum by _Dazed on Thursday, September 17, 2020 and has 25 replies.

Profile picture of _Dazed
@_Dazed
7 Years10,000+ Posts

Posted by bawlikestogomoo

You can fart inside me

If we stand back to back, we can fart inside of each other.

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Profile picture of _Dazed
@_Dazed
7 Years10,000+ Posts

Posted by PinsAndNeedles

Posted by Dread_Pirate_Phanta

Posted by PinsAndNeedles

Immediately.

lmao

Isn't the first shared toot usually an accident, anyway?

Good opportunity to see who they really are. The sooner, the better. 😂

click to expand

Right?

You don't want to get 2 years into a relationship thinking that they don't fart.. because on 2 years and one day, when they let one rip, it's like.. they aren't who you thought they were. What else are they hiding from you?!

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Profile picture of _Dazed
@_Dazed
7 Years10,000+ Posts

Posted by BlueStar

Posted by _Dazed

Posted by PinsAndNeedles

Posted by Dread_Pirate_Phanta

Posted by PinsAndNeedles

Immediately.

lmao

Isn't the first shared toot usually an accident, anyway?

Good opportunity to see who they really are. The sooner, the better. 😂

Right?

You don't want to get 2 years into a relationship thinking that they don't fart.. because on 2 years and one day, when they let one rip, it's like.. they aren't who you thought they were. What else are they hiding from you?!

Then they get the tracker.

click to expand

Hook it to their exhaust pipe.

Profile picture of _Dazed
@_Dazed
7 Years10,000+ Posts

Posted by FactCheck

I'm sorry someone made you feel like you couldnt release CO2 when a build up could potentially kill you. Let em rip when its comfortable for you and let the past trauma be released with them. *turns on aromatherapy humidifier*

What if you fart in an open plan kitchen?

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Profile picture of _Dazed
@_Dazed
7 Years10,000+ Posts

Posted by BlueStar

Posted by Dread_Pirate_Phanta

Posted by _Dazed

Posted by PinsAndNeedles

Posted by Dread_Pirate_Phanta

Posted by PinsAndNeedles

Immediately.

lmao

Isn't the first shared toot usually an accident, anyway?

Good opportunity to see who they really are. The sooner, the better. 😂

Right?

You don't want to get 2 years into a relationship thinking that they don't fart.. because on 2 years and one day, when they let one rip, it's like.. they aren't who you thought they were. What else are they hiding from you?!

There was a girl in my high school who claimed she never farted. What a ding-dong. That's still the first thing I think of when I think of her.

I’m not gonna say that I don’t fart but no one has ever seen me fart.

click to expand

"seen me fart"

Like with an infrared camera?

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Profile picture of AbbyNormal
@AbbyNormal
13 Years5,000+ PostsTaurus

I saw blow one out early on. You’ll know if you really like them or not by your reaction. Everyone farts so it’s just a test if you can survive their farts. It almost makes me instantly more comfortable with someone when they do haha. And I’m immature so I think it’s still funny lol Scorpio and Virguy both made farts hilarious for me, so no biggie in my book.

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Profile picture of AbbyNormal
@AbbyNormal
13 Years5,000+ PostsTaurus

Posted by _Dazed

Posted by PinsAndNeedles

Posted by Dread_Pirate_Phanta

Posted by PinsAndNeedles

Immediately.

lmao

Isn't the first shared toot usually an accident, anyway?

Good opportunity to see who they really are. The sooner, the better. 😂

Right?

You don't want to get 2 years into a relationship thinking that they don't fart.. because on 2 years and one day, when they let one rip, it's like.. they aren't who you thought they were. What else are they hiding from you?!

click to expand

Lol my Libra bestie in high school held em in too much so she would fart in her sleep next to her boyfriend lol

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Profile picture of AbbyNormal
@AbbyNormal
13 Years5,000+ PostsTaurus

Posted by MrsElleCappysnatch

We don't do that in front of each other.

However, a couple months ago, in the middle of the night he did it....like a lot and very loud....while he was sleeping.

I was disturbed for like three days but I never told him why 😭😭😭😭

Lmao! That’s why you don’t hold em in!!!!

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Profile picture of bawlikestogomoo
@bawlikestogomoo
13 Years1,000+ Posts

Posted by _Dazed

Posted by bawlikestogomoo

You can fart inside me

If we stand back to back, we can fart inside of each other.

click to expand

I have some N95 masks so we can practice safe breathing

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Profile picture of justagirl
@justagirl
12 Years10,000+ Posts

Posted by _Dazed

Posted by FactCheck

I'm sorry someone made you feel like you couldnt release CO2 when a build up could potentially kill you. Let em rip when its comfortable for you and let the past trauma be released with them. *turns on aromatherapy humidifier*

What if you fart in an open plan kitchen?

click to expand

LEAVE my kitchen alone. i'll fart on your head!

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Profile picture of twinkletoes
@twinkletoes
9 Years1,000+ Posts

Posted by Dreamy88

This isn't what it sounds like, but

My coworker tried to sit on my hand when I had my hand on a desk so I stuck my finger out so it would poke his butt hole. Then he farted on my finger and smiled.

The next day, he went to lunch in the locker room. I stood next to him and gave him the loudest clappy fart. Then I scooped the air and threw it at him.

Revenge is best served warm and moist

That's really not too comforting because it sounds like you two are gay-tastic.

Profile picture of AbbyNormal
@AbbyNormal
13 Years5,000+ PostsTaurus

Posted by Dreamy88

This isn't what it sounds like, but

My coworker tried to sit on my hand when I had my hand on a desk so I stuck my finger out so it would poke his butt hole. Then he farted on my finger and smiled.

The next day, he went to lunch in the locker room. I stood next to him and gave him the loudest clappy fart. Then I scooped the air and threw it at him.

Revenge is best served warm and moist

*giggles hysterically like a 5 yr old*

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Profile picture of pooface222
@pooface222
10 Years1,000+ Posts

I make it a rule Never to fart in front of a guy. Its too embarrassing, so I leave the area/room and find somewhere Outside (eg garden), or the toilet to fart.

Even in marriage I refused to let myself do that.

I have however accidently farted in front of him, so because he wasn't used to me farting, he'd make a big deal and laugh so much!

Profile picture of _Dazed
@_Dazed
7 Years10,000+ Posts

Posted by Arielle83

My partner never farts in front of me.

I’m pregnant and just going with it even more now.

Plus I’m eating a lot of Kale and mesculan salad mix

Pregnant belly pics please

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Profile picture of AbbyNormal
@AbbyNormal
13 Years5,000+ PostsTaurus

Posted by Arielle83

My partner never farts in front of me.

I’m pregnant and just going with it even more now.

Plus I’m eating a lot of Kale and mesculan salad mix

Omg congratulations!!! So happy for you!