not that I want it to happen

BUT

would it make more sense if this guy broke up with me?

so i've been dating this guy since june. and i absolutely love him (not that it prevented me from trying to break up with him at least once a month) but for lack of better words, i went absolutely crazy over a misunderstanding (something that apparently is a feature on fb that does auto-like and auto-follow) and coz of this unfortunate misunderstanding, i've said a lot of things that quite frankly must've been all the accumulated vulnerabilities and paranoia that i've carried over from a previous relationship. but like, why is the ball not dropping? like srsly why even deal with me? i wouldn't even deal with me.

Posted by PezRojoPescadoAzul

Nobody's perfect. Just let him love you. Love doesn't have to make sense

i feel super self-conscious after the incident. we've always had access to each other's accounts but i've never said too much about my feelings. and coz of what happened, everything came out all at once. he's been extra reassuring but i still feel slightly mortified about it.

Posted by PezRojoPescadoAzul

Posted by virgoOPPP

Posted by PezRojoPescadoAzul

Nobody's perfect. Just let him love you. Love doesn't have to make sense

i feel super self-conscious after the incident. we've always had access to each other's accounts but i've never said too much about my feelings. and coz of what happened, everything came out all at once. he's been extra reassuring but i still feel slightly mortified about it.

You're clearly very aware of what you said and why, and feel bad about it. If you were completely unrepentant it would be a very different story. Are you communicating all of these facors and feelings to him after the incident? You can't expect him to read your mind and feelings completely

If you're aware of your mistakes it means you can work towards taking a different approach in the future. And I'm not saying you're doing this, but don't end up taking forgiveness and understanding for granted. And don't self-fulfill a prophecy of him breaking up with you to punish yourself, or other reasons

click to expand

i tend to hide my thoughts and feelings until i can't anymore. but i'm always both embarrassed and relieved that he manages to see through everything. he's literally a wizard.

funny (or sad?) that you mention prophecy coz we've both had dreams of breaking up. but i swear before this incident, i had one (2 before that) of us breaking up. it's the only thing i keep having dreams about lately almost like it's my biggest latent fear.

am i anakin skywalker? 😅😅

Posted by TXCowboy

I called it at least 2 months ago or so: you were already in the process of breaking up with this guy. Nothing you could do was going to change that.

That's just how you're built, God bless. 😔

thanks for wishing doom on me

but fyi, we're still together

@TXCowboy

srsly you're starting to irritate me. you talk like i go into 1-week relationships instead of long-term relationships that spans years. only time i've posted they didn't was twice and that other one was only coz he went to jail 🙄🙄 and like a couple of bad dates. like have you seen other people's relationship posts here?

you must be in a perfectly long-term relationship with zero issues then.

Posted by FuManchu

😆 that's probably the most real you've been with him, and it's probably reassured him in ways you don't realize.

🤔🤔 i found his reaction kinda weird. he seemed to completely bypass everything i've said (tho he said it's the first time he's heard me cuss coz i only really do that when i'm very angry). and all he seemed to be concerned with was how we almost broke up over an fb feature coz of my refusal to communicate.

i bet i'm not the only one who didn't know that feature existed 😭😭

Posted by FuManchu

Posted by virgoOPPP

Posted by FuManchu

😆 that's probably the most real you've been with him, and it's probably reassured him in ways you don't realize.

🤔🤔 i found his reaction kinda weird. he seemed to completely bypass everything i've said (tho he said it's the first time he's heard me cuss coz i only really do that when i'm very angry). and all he seemed to be concerned with was how we almost broke up over an fb feature coz of my refusal to communicate.

i bet i'm not the only one who didn't know that feature existed 😭😭

Yeah. I didn't know that. Apparently you verified it?

That's the danger of bottling up stuff like that though, as you already know - sometimes the trigger is misunderstanding that leaves everyone confused lol. Hopefully, since he reacted in a positive way, you'll be more open with him and not bottle everything up.

click to expand

yeah it exists coz i looked at my own logs and saw a similar pattern. even googled it. and he looked genuinely clueless when i confronted him. even accused me of making things up to get rid of him. like why would i be this angry over a dude i don't want? i love him so much 😭😭 even when i was trying to break up with him, i told him we should have breakfast before i kick him out just to stall 😂😂

Hey girl hey hope you’ve been hanging in there. I haven’t had a chance to tell you how heartbroken I was when I came across a post about your father passing. Been sending you and your family lots of thoughts and prayers.

You’re going through a very tough time, be easy on yourself. And while you’ve already had tendencies to be self-sabotaging outside of it, the past guys were pretty bad choices so I can see it be a self-preserving mechanism to get out of bad relationships. I don’t know much details of this new guy but let me tell you if someone comes off as psychic of your thoughts, feelings or dreams that take you by surprise many times even when you’re lacking proper expression of them, I’d say that guy is pretty decent husband material lol. YOU DESERVE NICE THINGS LIKE THAT. Please read the previous sentence again. Unfortunately according to law of attraction, unless you truly believe it for yourself, you really risk losing it because of the energy of working against yourself. So be good to yourself and practice believing in it until it just becomes part of you. DON’T OVERTHINK IT, just believeee and let wonderful experiences flow around you and express gratitude for them when you can to receive more. We need to work on cultivating that mindset of yours but baby steps are ok.

i agree with everyone here. it's okay. people go ape shit every once in a while. no matter how mentally/emotionally stable they normally are. we would all be single af forever if we discarded people every time they displayed a flaw or an occasional shortcoming. your guy was even offended that you tried to break up with him lol 😂 take that as a sign that you're clearly still wanted/needed. don't self-reject before anything has happened.

There is a feature for auto like and auto follow on fb? Huh 🤔

here, this might make you feel slightly better...(if it doesn't, i'm sorry. i apologise.)

my guy is normally super chill, calm and unproblematic.

once in a while though, he goes ape shit when he can't find me even though i told him where i was gonna be. that dude has amnesia. i have too many stories of his amnesia that none of us have time for. anyway, what i'm trying to say is, people who are normally stable, sometimes act in deranged ways.

i was at a business event and couldn't take calls. he forgot. he usually leaves me alone when i'm out and about.

what i'm trying to say is....it's normal for people to act out of character sometimes. you aren't weird or problematic just because you were worried about something.

Posted by LadyNeptune

There is a feature for auto like and auto follow on fb? Huh 🤔

yeah at first i thought it was BS, that he was lying. but i looked at my own activity history/logs and saw likes and follows for guys i don't even know (look into settings then apps coz somehow the interaction between them makes it happen). not as much as the ones he had on his (due to past downloads of his dating apps coz i only ever had one and mind you, they show up on this part of fb even when deleted) but it made me google it for confirmation. and it even kept happening when we were both busy arguing which only further confirmed that he was telling the truth (when he's not even holding his phone). then we looked into fb settings apps and there they were.

Posted by serenidad

here, this might make you feel slightly better...(if it doesn't, i'm sorry. i apologise.)

my guy is normally super chill, calm and unproblematic.

once in a while though, he goes ape shit when he can't find me even though i told him where i was gonna be. that dude has amnesia. i have too many stories of his amnesia that none of us have time for. anyway, what i'm trying to say is, people who are normally stable, sometimes act in deranged ways.

i was at a business event and couldn't take calls. he forgot. he usually leaves me alone when i'm out and about.

what i'm trying to say is....it's normal for people to act out of character sometimes. you aren't weird or problematic just because you were worried about something.

he has me on GPS but i track him through his activity logs. my ex cheated on me but i didn't find out about it through the logs. just that i had a very bad feeling about his blank history and missed videocall he attempted early morning.

1.) wiped/blank history of past convos

2.) not just a call but vchat

3.) early morning vchat

i'm no sherlock holmes but it led to further discoveries 🕵‍♀🕵‍♀

but i was too trusting then when i had more reason not to be. now i'm just crazy when i have zero reason or proof 🤷‍♀🤷‍♀

Posted by DragonSag

Posted by virgoOPPP

Posted by serenidad

here, this might make you feel slightly better...(if it doesn't, i'm sorry. i apologise.)

my guy is normally super chill, calm and unproblematic.

once in a while though, he goes ape shit when he can't find me even though i told him where i was gonna be. that dude has amnesia. i have too many stories of his amnesia that none of us have time for. anyway, what i'm trying to say is, people who are normally stable, sometimes act in deranged ways.

i was at a business event and couldn't take calls. he forgot. he usually leaves me alone when i'm out and about.

what i'm trying to say is....it's normal for people to act out of character sometimes. you aren't weird or problematic just because you were worried about something.

he has me on GPS but i track him through his activity logs. my ex cheated on me but i didn't find out about it through the logs. just that i had a very bad feeling about his blank history and missed videocall he attempted early morning.

1.) wiped/blank history of past convos

2.) not just a call but vchat

3.) early morning vchat

i'm no sherlock holmes but it led to further discoveries 🕵‍♀🕵‍♀

but i was too trusting then when i had more reason not to be. now i'm just crazy when i have zero reason or proof 🤷‍♀🤷‍♀

Wow...how do you live that way? That's some serious f...d up situation to be with someone that way. Not to mention it's sick and nerve wrecking if that's what it takes to be with someone. If you can't trust them why be with them in the first place?Honestly if someone would track me down or trace my activity...I would be out that door like yesterday. That's a huge red flag and very unhealthy relationship. Also, if you can't trust this guy after your previous disappointments you need to work on that with someone to guide you to overcome insecurities and to be more in tune with your own value. I mean, come on, GPS tracking and activity logs? Why? Does that really sound to you like something people should be doing when they are in a relationship?

click to expand

i don't mind being tracked via GPS coz it's mostly for my own safety. plus he does the same with his sister for her safety as well. the whole activity logs i only really look into when i have a bad feeling (prob only the 2nd time i've done it with him). and we have 100% access to each other's info tho so it's not like he doesn't know.

if you have nothing to hide then why mind a little snooping?

our accounts are logged into each other's phones (social media, emails, financial) and i'll be frank, we have very little to zero boundaries with each other.

Posted by DragonSag

Posted by LadyNeptune

There is a feature for auto like and auto follow on fb? Huh 🤔

Only if you log in to such apps/sites. Which is not the case here surely, but I can't go to far into explaining...it's just fake explanation. I know exactly how it works cause I used it long time ago in regards for work. But it doesn't work the way two of them think or try to explain. Also it gets your account blocked easily if you log in to such apps. Besides, in order for auto like and follow to work, both accounts - one that is followed and one that is following would need to have logged in to facebook using that app/site, so just randomly like what they're explaining is simply a no, it doesn't work that way.

click to expand

then how do you explain it happening? is it coz of clicking on pop ups? coz i sure as hell don't open apps that i have no business opening (like i said, we have 100% access to each other's stuff).

Posted by virgoOPPP

Posted by LadyNeptune

There is a feature for auto like and auto follow on fb? Huh 🤔

yeah at first i thought it was BS, that he was lying. but i looked at my own activity history/logs and saw likes and follows for guys i don't even know (look into settings then apps coz somehow the interaction between them makes it happen). not as much as the ones he had on his (due to past downloads of his dating apps coz i only ever had one and mind you, they show up on this part of fb even when deleted) but it made me google it for confirmation. and it even kept happening when we were both busy arguing which only further confirmed that he was telling the truth (when he's not even holding his phone). then we looked into fb settings apps and there they were.

click to expand

It honestly does sound like bs. But why are you worried about follows and likes tho? Let the man live his life.

Posted by LadyNeptune

Posted by virgoOPPP

Posted by LadyNeptune

There is a feature for auto like and auto follow on fb? Huh 🤔

yeah at first i thought it was BS, that he was lying. but i looked at my own activity history/logs and saw likes and follows for guys i don't even know (look into settings then apps coz somehow the interaction between them makes it happen). not as much as the ones he had on his (due to past downloads of his dating apps coz i only ever had one and mind you, they show up on this part of fb even when deleted) but it made me google it for confirmation. and it even kept happening when we were both busy arguing which only further confirmed that he was telling the truth (when he's not even holding his phone). then we looked into fb settings apps and there they were.

It honestly does sound like bs. But why are you worried about follows and likes tho? Let the man live his life.

click to expand

it's really not coz it happened to my account too but not as much as it does to his.

this feature is just dumb.

Posted by virgoOPPP

Posted by LadyNeptune

Posted by virgoOPPP

Posted by LadyNeptune

There is a feature for auto like and auto follow on fb? Huh 🤔

yeah at first i thought it was BS, that he was lying. but i looked at my own activity history/logs and saw likes and follows for guys i don't even know (look into settings then apps coz somehow the interaction between them makes it happen). not as much as the ones he had on his (due to past downloads of his dating apps coz i only ever had one and mind you, they show up on this part of fb even when deleted) but it made me google it for confirmation. and it even kept happening when we were both busy arguing which only further confirmed that he was telling the truth (when he's not even holding his phone). then we looked into fb settings apps and there they were.

It honestly does sound like bs. But why are you worried about follows and likes tho? Let the man live his life.

it's really not coz it happened to my account too but not as much as it does to his.

this feature is just dumb.

click to expand

Ok but dumb feature aside, why sweat who he likes and follows?

Posted by LadyNeptune

Posted by virgoOPPP

Posted by LadyNeptune

Posted by virgoOPPP

Posted by LadyNeptune

There is a feature for auto like and auto follow on fb? Huh 🤔

yeah at first i thought it was BS, that he was lying. but i looked at my own activity history/logs and saw likes and follows for guys i don't even know (look into settings then apps coz somehow the interaction between them makes it happen). not as much as the ones he had on his (due to past downloads of his dating apps coz i only ever had one and mind you, they show up on this part of fb even when deleted) but it made me google it for confirmation. and it even kept happening when we were both busy arguing which only further confirmed that he was telling the truth (when he's not even holding his phone). then we looked into fb settings apps and there they were.

It honestly does sound like bs. But why are you worried about follows and likes tho? Let the man live his life.

it's really not coz it happened to my account too but not as much as it does to his.

this feature is just dumb.

Ok but dumb feature aside, why sweat who he likes and follows?

click to expand

coz i'm paranoid?

Posted by DragonSag

Posted by virgoOPPP

Posted by DragonSag

Posted by virgoOPPP

Posted by serenidad

here, this might make you feel slightly better...(if it doesn't, i'm sorry. i apologise.)

my guy is normally super chill, calm and unproblematic.

once in a while though, he goes ape shit when he can't find me even though i told him where i was gonna be. that dude has amnesia. i have too many stories of his amnesia that none of us have time for. anyway, what i'm trying to say is, people who are normally stable, sometimes act in deranged ways.

i was at a business event and couldn't take calls. he forgot. he usually leaves me alone when i'm out and about.

what i'm trying to say is....it's normal for people to act out of character sometimes. you aren't weird or problematic just because you were worried about something.

he has me on GPS but i track him through his activity logs. my ex cheated on me but i didn't find out about it through the logs. just that i had a very bad feeling about his blank history and missed videocall he attempted early morning.

1.) wiped/blank history of past convos

2.) not just a call but vchat

3.) early morning vchat

i'm no sherlock holmes but it led to further discoveries 🕵‍♀🕵‍♀

but i was too trusting then when i had more reason not to be. now i'm just crazy when i have zero reason or proof 🤷‍♀🤷‍♀

Wow...how do you live that way? That's some serious f...d up situation to be with someone that way. Not to mention it's sick and nerve wrecking if that's what it takes to be with someone. If you can't trust them why be with them in the first place?Honestly if someone would track me down or trace my activity...I would be out that door like yesterday. That's a huge red flag and very unhealthy relationship. Also, if you can't trust this guy after your previous disappointments you need to work on that with someone to guide you to overcome insecurities and to be more in tune with your own value. I mean, come on, GPS tracking and activity logs? Why? Does that really sound to you like something people should be doing when they are in a relationship?

i don't mind being tracked via GPS coz it's mostly for my own safety. plus he does the same with his sister for her safety as well. the whole activity logs i only really look into when i have a bad feeling (prob only the 2nd time i've done it with him). and we have 100% access to each other's info tho so it's not like he doesn't know.

if you have nothing to hide then why mind a little snooping?

our accounts are logged into each other's phones (social media, emails, financial) and i'll be frank, we have very little to zero boundaries with each other.

To tell you the truth that much is just too much for my taste but people sre different. I need personal space and to talk what I want, how I want and with whom I want and that I could never do if someone keeps an eye on me all the time. There's no talk about cheating here but sometimes I just want to rent about what bothers me with my bf to a friend so how do I do that if he reads stuff I write? Or I don't want to explain why I liked someone's post or comment or photo. And stuff like that. To me that feels like someone is suffocating me. I had my bf run through all my messages on facebook and check all of my friends (Virgo btw) and luckily I had previously deleted compromising messages but if he saw them it could have lead to a fight that there was no real reason since it's all past after all and a lot of messages you need to know the context to understand them without bad intention. I don't want to explain my purchases either lol and I don't mind him following and liking random girls on insta, it's all just fun after all. It's not like he can get a chance to be with them or anything🤷🏼‍♀️ well even if he could at this point I would just say go for it, we only live once🤷🏼‍♀️ as for how your likes and follows appear - people buy and sell pages and change names of them so sll of a sudden you can be following something very different from what you used to follow. Other than that there is no option to like/follow someone on facebook unless you log in to application that gathers followers and likes. You should check your logged devices and apps with permision to access your personal information cause at some point you had to give permission in order for that to happen.

click to expand

i actually talk about him more on here coz he's not into astrology. he knows i share stuff to this place and some of his pics that i post some stickers on. the only thing he didn't like was when he saw sexual threads on here which i had to explain was just some people from different places asking about things and sharing stuff.

yeah everyone's different. he's looked through my phone the first weekend we spent together. and he basically moved in on the 2nd weekend and we only really go out for work business or dates. i'm actually really comfortable with this coz i know i'm absolutely faithful and i found it awkward to have convos the first days we were dating.

like here's my phone, find out about everything in my life now if you want.

i'm gonna go look through our apps again.

Posted by virgoOPPP

Posted by LadyNeptune

Posted by virgoOPPP

Posted by LadyNeptune

Posted by virgoOPPP

Posted by LadyNeptune

There is a feature for auto like and auto follow on fb? Huh 🤔

yeah at first i thought it was BS, that he was lying. but i looked at my own activity history/logs and saw likes and follows for guys i don't even know (look into settings then apps coz somehow the interaction between them makes it happen). not as much as the ones he had on his (due to past downloads of his dating apps coz i only ever had one and mind you, they show up on this part of fb even when deleted) but it made me google it for confirmation. and it even kept happening when we were both busy arguing which only further confirmed that he was telling the truth (when he's not even holding his phone). then we looked into fb settings apps and there they were.

It honestly does sound like bs. But why are you worried about follows and likes tho? Let the man live his life.

it's really not coz it happened to my account too but not as much as it does to his.

this feature is just dumb.

Ok but dumb feature aside, why sweat who he likes and follows?

coz i'm paranoid?

click to expand

And why is that. I am trying to get at the heart of it.

You paranoid because of what he is/has done?

Or your paranoid because of what a past partner has done?

Or paranoia is your natural state.

Posted by LadyNeptune

Posted by virgoOPPP

Posted by LadyNeptune

Posted by virgoOPPP

Posted by LadyNeptune

Posted by virgoOPPP

Posted by LadyNeptune

There is a feature for auto like and auto follow on fb? Huh 🤔

yeah at first i thought it was BS, that he was lying. but i looked at my own activity history/logs and saw likes and follows for guys i don't even know (look into settings then apps coz somehow the interaction between them makes it happen). not as much as the ones he had on his (due to past downloads of his dating apps coz i only ever had one and mind you, they show up on this part of fb even when deleted) but it made me google it for confirmation. and it even kept happening when we were both busy arguing which only further confirmed that he was telling the truth (when he's not even holding his phone). then we looked into fb settings apps and there they were.

It honestly does sound like bs. But why are you worried about follows and likes tho? Let the man live his life.

it's really not coz it happened to my account too but not as much as it does to his.

this feature is just dumb.

Ok but dumb feature aside, why sweat who he likes and follows?

coz i'm paranoid?

And why is that. I am trying to get at the heart of it.

You paranoid because of what he is/has done?

Or your paranoid because of what a past partner has done?

Or paranoia is your natural state.

click to expand

half apps, half past

Guys like a little crazy don't let them fool you.

Posted by alexscaries

Posted by virgoOPPP

Posted by DragonSag

Posted by virgoOPPP

Posted by DragonSag

Posted by virgoOPPP

Posted by serenidad

here, this might make you feel slightly better...(if it doesn't, i'm sorry. i apologise.)

my guy is normally super chill, calm and unproblematic.

once in a while though, he goes ape shit when he can't find me even though i told him where i was gonna be. that dude has amnesia. i have too many stories of his amnesia that none of us have time for. anyway, what i'm trying to say is, people who are normally stable, sometimes act in deranged ways.

i was at a business event and couldn't take calls. he forgot. he usually leaves me alone when i'm out and about.

what i'm trying to say is....it's normal for people to act out of character sometimes. you aren't weird or problematic just because you were worried about something.

he has me on GPS but i track him through his activity logs. my ex cheated on me but i didn't find out about it through the logs. just that i had a very bad feeling about his blank history and missed videocall he attempted early morning.

1.) wiped/blank history of past convos

2.) not just a call but vchat

3.) early morning vchat

i'm no sherlock holmes but it led to further discoveries 🕵‍♀🕵‍♀

but i was too trusting then when i had more reason not to be. now i'm just crazy when i have zero reason or proof 🤷‍♀🤷‍♀

Wow...how do you live that way? That's some serious f...d up situation to be with someone that way. Not to mention it's sick and nerve wrecking if that's what it takes to be with someone. If you can't trust them why be with them in the first place?Honestly if someone would track me down or trace my activity...I would be out that door like yesterday. That's a huge red flag and very unhealthy relationship. Also, if you can't trust this guy after your previous disappointments you need to work on that with someone to guide you to overcome insecurities and to be more in tune with your own value. I mean, come on, GPS tracking and activity logs? Why? Does that really sound to you like something people should be doing when they are in a relationship?

i don't mind being tracked via GPS coz it's mostly for my own safety. plus he does the same with his sister for her safety as well. the whole activity logs i only really look into when i have a bad feeling (prob only the 2nd time i've done it with him). and we have 100% access to each other's info tho so it's not like he doesn't know.

if you have nothing to hide then why mind a little snooping?

our accounts are logged into each other's phones (social media, emails, financial) and i'll be frank, we have very little to zero boundaries with each other.

To tell you the truth that much is just too much for my taste but people sre different. I need personal space and to talk what I want, how I want and with whom I want and that I could never do if someone keeps an eye on me all the time. There's no talk about cheating here but sometimes I just want to rent about what bothers me with my bf to a friend so how do I do that if he reads stuff I write? Or I don't want to explain why I liked someone's post or comment or photo. And stuff like that. To me that feels like someone is suffocating me. I had my bf run through all my messages on facebook and check all of my friends (Virgo btw) and luckily I had previously deleted compromising messages but if he saw them it could have lead to a fight that there was no real reason since it's all past after all and a lot of messages you need to know the context to understand them without bad intention. I don't want to explain my purchases either lol and I don't mind him following and liking random girls on insta, it's all just fun after all. It's not like he can get a chance to be with them or anything🤷🏼‍♀️ well even if he could at this point I would just say go for it, we only live once🤷🏼‍♀️ as for how your likes and follows appear - people buy and sell pages and change names of them so sll of a sudden you can be following something very different from what you used to follow. Other than that there is no option to like/follow someone on facebook unless you log in to application that gathers followers and likes. You should check your logged devices and apps with permision to access your personal information cause at some point you had to give permission in order for that to happen.

i actually talk about him more on here coz he's not into astrology. he knows i share stuff to this place and some of his pics that i post some stickers on. the only thing he didn't like was when he saw sexual threads on here which i had to explain was just some people from different places asking about things and sharing stuff.

yeah everyone's different. he's looked through my phone the first weekend we spent together. and he basically moved in on the 2nd weekend and we only reall go out for work business or dates. i'm actually really comfortable with this coz i know i'm absolutely faithful and i found it awkward to have convos the first days we were dating.

like here's my phone, find out about everything in my life now if you want.

i'm gonna go look through our apps again.

All the relationships are different, but that to me is bat shit crazy. I don't even look at a girlfriends phone unless she shows me. I wouldn't even move in after a year.

I also don't care if a girlfriend has say a coffee with a man from work. I trust someone implicitly. If someone said they wanted to track me, I'm done.

click to expand

i think most people would be bothered.

but this isn't my first rodeo so 🤷🤷

Posted by MonaLisa26

Posted by virgoOPPP

Posted by DragonSag

Posted by virgoOPPP

Posted by serenidad

here, this might make you feel slightly better...(if it doesn't, i'm sorry. i apologise.)

my guy is normally super chill, calm and unproblematic.

once in a while though, he goes ape shit when he can't find me even though i told him where i was gonna be. that dude has amnesia. i have too many stories of his amnesia that none of us have time for. anyway, what i'm trying to say is, people who are normally stable, sometimes act in deranged ways.

i was at a business event and couldn't take calls. he forgot. he usually leaves me alone when i'm out and about.

what i'm trying to say is....it's normal for people to act out of character sometimes. you aren't weird or problematic just because you were worried about something.

he has me on GPS but i track him through his activity logs. my ex cheated on me but i didn't find out about it through the logs. just that i had a very bad feeling about his blank history and missed videocall he attempted early morning.

1.) wiped/blank history of past convos

2.) not just a call but vchat

3.) early morning vchat

i'm no sherlock holmes but it led to further discoveries 🕵‍♀🕵‍♀

but i was too trusting then when i had more reason not to be. now i'm just crazy when i have zero reason or proof 🤷‍♀🤷‍♀

Wow...how do you live that way? That's some serious f...d up situation to be with someone that way. Not to mention it's sick and nerve wrecking if that's what it takes to be with someone. If you can't trust them why be with them in the first place?Honestly if someone would track me down or trace my activity...I would be out that door like yesterday. That's a huge red flag and very unhealthy relationship. Also, if you can't trust this guy after your previous disappointments you need to work on that with someone to guide you to overcome insecurities and to be more in tune with your own value. I mean, come on, GPS tracking and activity logs? Why? Does that really sound to you like something people should be doing when they are in a relationship?

i don't mind being tracked via GPS coz it's mostly for my own safety. plus he does the same with his sister for her safety as well. the whole activity logs i only really look into when i have a bad feeling (prob only the 2nd time i've done it with him). and we have 100% access to each other's info tho so it's not like he doesn't know.

if you have nothing to hide then why mind a little snooping?

our accounts are logged into each other's phones (social media, emails, financial) and i'll be frank, we have very little to zero boundaries with each other.

With you on if you have nothing to hide then why mind a little snooping?

I was actually stunned in a funny way when on a first and second date Virgo openly looked at my phone pictures with me browsing and pointed his finger asking what's that? and I was showing him and explaining what was what and I kept from asking WTF? I just understood his concern. At our age being fooled is embarrassing.

He is still doing it from time to time and every time my phone ping when I get new text he is asking if it is my other boyfriend...and I show him what it is. Normally its an Apple updates shit...

I do feel like I am doing community service and being nice and polite insuring his trust and not making big deal out of it.

I do not understand really why people go apeshit 'dont touch my phone' IF there is nothing to hide.

Just an attitude issue or WHAT? If you care about someone and you know they are jealous - help them! Do not be a bitch.

click to expand

right?

why react passionately if you've got nothing to hide on that phone?

Posted by DragonSag

Posted by MonaLisa26

Posted by virgoOPPP

Posted by MonaLisa26

Posted by virgoOPPP

Posted by DragonSag

Posted by virgoOPPP

Posted by serenidad

here, this might make you feel slightly better...(if it doesn't, i'm sorry. i apologise.)

my guy is normally super chill, calm and unproblematic.

once in a while though, he goes ape shit when he can't find me even though i told him where i was gonna be. that dude has amnesia. i have too many stories of his amnesia that none of us have time for. anyway, what i'm trying to say is, people who are normally stable, sometimes act in deranged ways.

i was at a business event and couldn't take calls. he forgot. he usually leaves me alone when i'm out and about.

what i'm trying to say is....it's normal for people to act out of character sometimes. you aren't weird or problematic just because you were worried about something.

he has me on GPS but i track him through his activity logs. my ex cheated on me but i didn't find out about it through the logs. just that i had a very bad feeling about his blank history and missed videocall he attempted early morning.

1.) wiped/blank history of past convos

2.) not just a call but vchat

3.) early morning vchat

i'm no sherlock holmes but it led to further discoveries 🕵‍♀🕵‍♀

but i was too trusting then when i had more reason not to be. now i'm just crazy when i have zero reason or proof 🤷‍♀🤷‍♀

Wow...how do you live that way? That's some serious f...d up situation to be with someone that way. Not to mention it's sick and nerve wrecking if that's what it takes to be with someone. If you can't trust them why be with them in the first place?Honestly if someone would track me down or trace my activity...I would be out that door like yesterday. That's a huge red flag and very unhealthy relationship. Also, if you can't trust this guy after your previous disappointments you need to work on that with someone to guide you to overcome insecurities and to be more in tune with your own value. I mean, come on, GPS tracking and activity logs? Why? Does that really sound to you like something people should be doing when they are in a relationship?

i don't mind being tracked via GPS coz it's mostly for my own safety. plus he does the same with his sister for her safety as well. the whole activity logs i only really look into when i have a bad feeling (prob only the 2nd time i've done it with him). and we have 100% access to each other's info tho so it's not like he doesn't know.

if you have nothing to hide then why mind a little snooping?

our accounts are logged into each other's phones (social media, emails, financial) and i'll be frank, we have very little to zero boundaries with each other.

With you on if you have nothing to hide then why mind a little snooping?

I was actually stunned in a funny way when on a first and second date Virgo openly looked at my phone pictures with me browsing and pointed his finger asking what's that? and I was showing him and explaining what was what and I kept from asking WTF? I just understood his concern. At our age being fooled is embarrassing.

He is still doing it from time to time and every time my phone ping when I get new text he is asking if it is my other boyfriend...and I show him what it is. Normally its an Apple updates shit...

I do feel like I am doing community service and being nice and polite insuring his trust and not making big deal out of it.

I do not understand really why people go apeshit 'dont touch my phone' IF there is nothing to hide.

Just an attitude issue or WHAT? If you care about someone and you know they are jealous - help them! Do not be a bitch.

right?

why react passionately if you've got nothing to hide on that phone?

I guess because most do. Or argumentative/stupid etc.

I am thinking if he sees that there is nothing going on - he will simply relax and in times it wont matter anymore (unless he is a psycho lol) and life will be ok...OR lets have attitude and ruing everything? Pick and choose.

One would think that, wouldn't they? But they don't relax and it always matters ( and yes, they're a little psycho about that). 10 years and it's still all the same - who's that? What they want? Peeking while your typing...etc... Dumb me, I didn't take the hint of my friend Virgo when she and her Virgo bf did that to each other daily. And they also do it still - 6 years later, married and with child. It's your life from now on, there's no relaxing😂

click to expand

hey, if it works for them 🤷🤷

to be fair, i was super chill in previous relationships. which ended up with me being manipulated so that's not gonna happen again. i wanna be a bit more cautious.

Posted by virgoOPPP

Posted by serenidad

here, this might make you feel slightly better...(if it doesn't, i'm sorry. i apologise.)

my guy is normally super chill, calm and unproblematic.

once in a while though, he goes ape shit when he can't find me even though i told him where i was gonna be. that dude has amnesia. i have too many stories of his amnesia that none of us have time for. anyway, what i'm trying to say is, people who are normally stable, sometimes act in deranged ways.

i was at a business event and couldn't take calls. he forgot. he usually leaves me alone when i'm out and about.

what i'm trying to say is....it's normal for people to act out of character sometimes. you aren't weird or problematic just because you were worried about something.

he has me on GPS but i track him through his activity logs. my ex cheated on me but i didn't find out about it through the logs. just that i had a very bad feeling about his blank history and missed videocall he attempted early morning.

1.) wiped/blank history of past convos

2.) not just a call but vchat

3.) early morning vchat

i'm no sherlock holmes but it led to further discoveries 🕵‍♀🕵‍♀

but i was too trusting then when i had more reason not to be. now i'm just crazy when i have zero reason or proof 🤷‍♀🤷‍♀

click to expand

...the whole GPS, tracking online activities....that sounds a bit extreme...but i guess if you guys are mutually okay with it...:/ the thing is though, you were doing all of this tracking/going through phone with your ex too and he still cheated regardless, right..? (if i'm understanding your explanation correctly) i feel like people who have their minds made up to cheat will do it regardless of any GPS you install (i mean, you hear stories of people f**king in empty movie theaters, bathrooms of restaurants/shopping malls etc) so cheating doesn't necessarily always happen at hotels or someone's apartment. the GPS could indicate that they're somewhere outside, but they could still be sneaking around/cheating. also, messages can be erased, receipts can be thrown away and false alibis can be created.

living in a constant state of paranoia can be draining and will eventually take its toll on you and him. would you want someone to stay with you because you strike fear in them or stay with you because they genuinely want to? most people would prefer the latter...😢

Because the right one for you doesn’t let little things like that be the reason why things end. They know compassion, empathy, and take the time to understand you … and realize that what you are doing is a defense mechanism due to the things you’ve experience. He knows things like this requires time, patience, and constant reassurance

He’s a keeper. But def work on controlling your chaos. There is only so much someone can take before they need to quit it