Being a Virgo's Girl...

Do Virgo men tend to withdraw when they decide the woman is too ahead of their class or too much competitive for them. In other words, do they go for an average woman instead of a supergirl only because they think they are not good enough for this type.

If that is the case, then the paradox is "how can a woman stand up to their standards but at the same time can indicate clearly that she is indeed accessible for him)?

(I know, some will say you can not "make" things happen, and you should always "be yourself" and see if they like what they see or not).

Yeah, being a Virgo's Girl is hard... (it IS rocket science!)

I dont think so...

Supergirl would leave the arena cause you know, she think she is super..! Personality problem.. i guess

And? being Virguy is not that hard..! we are often down to earth and humble..

Sorry, I should have described Supergirl as to someone "who has or exceeds his standards in his perception". She could be a regular girl in reality.

"who meets or exceeds..."

love4ever . . this post would suggest that you are thinking about whether you are ahead, or behind of the Virgo in class, with an attempt to ascertain whether the reason why he's pulling away is due to him thinking he's above, or below you.

FYI: Normally, they fear they aren't worthy of a woman, no matter where she fits into this scale . . so, it's really irrelvant because you could be the scum of the earth and he will still feel inadequate.

Additionally, since the average male Virgo feels this way (though, they would never admit it) . . once they realize they have feelings for a woman, they completely ignore this within them (they ignore this even when not in an attraction) . . so, again it's irrelevant because if he wants you, he will no matter your status, class or level.

In all honesty . . why would you be thinking about what level you might be on, compared to him? Because he's not gonna be thinking that. Sounds to me like you are making this harder than it has to be. I know, you already said, don't say, just be yourself, but, the fact of the matter is . . that's what the Virgo IS looking for . . a woman who is herself . . so, why not say this if it's true?

The Virgo response you got: "Personality problem", and, "down to earth and humble"

Testimonies from Virgo's come all the time in here to many different issues and problems and normally, they coincide with these exact responses . . how many times does a person have to tell the Non-V's this?

Are you listening?
Or, looking for different answers than the ones that are in front of you?
I dont' understand why people make this harder than it is.
People are, who people are . . it's that simple.

You want to know why the Virgo is pulling away from you . . again . . for you've been told, everybody has been told . . you the answer again?

Because that is the Virgo . . that IS his nature . . people are who people are.

Why can't a person be accepted for who they are?

A person ISN'T going to pop in here with the perfect answer, to fit within what a person wants to hear.

The Virgo pulls away . . to think . . to think some more . . to think some more . . to think and think and think . . pull away again to think some more . . .

That is the Virgo . . why can't people understand that? It's not THAT difficult to comprehend.

I'm sorry, loves4ever . . I don't mean to sound so nasty . . but, it just gets old. This is asked on a daily basis by people and they get answered the same way.

How many times does it have to be said before people realize . . this IS who they are?

Just the other day, Shaka said to me about not being diplomatic and I said to him, what does it matter how one talks to another . . a person can be nice, they can be considerate, they can be nasty as hell, they can be the most diplomatic person in the whole world . . does anybody listen?

No . . so what difference does it make, if nobody WANTS to believe what they don't want to hear?

I know you're thinking: "I'm just asking a question"

I'm sitting here thinking: "Again?"

** Takes out club, knocks upside the hard-heads

I know, notso . . you're right, as usual.

🙂

notso, how do you do the tongue smilie . . I only know how to do the one above

Yeah..

A person can be nice... but being diplomatic is bullshit..! as I always said.. and still saying..!

Diplomats..= manipulations.. lies and deceptions..!

Yes, a babe . . how are they hanging today . . we want updates, you know?

Are we blue today?

lol

😛

Hey, I did it . . thanks, luv

Oh, so you just want to get rubbed . . you Dawg, you

Men . . geeeeeeeez

😛

Annoyed?

Never

Hey, my husand wants us to go to Atlantic City to gamble . . yeah. Dosn't that sound like fun?

I think he just wants me to get drunk and submit . . .lol . . that dog.

"Yes, but you'd be surprised at how many will PM me with additional details"

Not surprised at all . . you'll keep telling them, over and over, and over, and over, and over . . where the hell you get all your patience, I've no clue.

I could use some . . got any extra to throw my way?

However, I can understand how annoying the Virgo can be for people. So, to get antsy over having to spend so much time, getting them to open up, is certainly something that would cause a person to go: gagagagoogoogoo.boing

Hey P-Angel - maybe your husband has the right idea but can you turn that to your advantage? What if you get HIM drunk - do you get a less 'Virgic' response then?

Could this mean that he really does 'get' that there is a problem between you two and he wants to try to fix it? (always trying to look at the bright side of everything 😛).

Scorpgal

Notso said: "The time spent seeking advice and outside "counseling" could be invested in communicating with your actual partner."

True, but I have no chance of contacting him out of blue and ask "Hey, what do you feel about me?". I'm already having a hard time to find excuses to text him once in a week or in every 10 days. We are not that close yet.

Believe me,I have read almost every thread on the Virgo board, some from start to end, and even taken notes. (Crazy isn't it?). But for some of them, the stories were somehow not quite comparable to mine. And I am asking questions only on those topics. Everytime itt gets down to "Virgos taking their time", but I want to find out if that is all? Can't there be some other issue? Maybe someone else had the exact same thing and can shed some light.

Take this: Learning Virgo men is like learning a foreign language. I am a beginner in this course. P-Angel and some others are in advance level, and Dyr and other Virgos are native. P-Angel does not want to repeat the words with me, cause maybe she's done with learning and she's not enjoying practicing anymore. She's onto something new maybe. But Dyr for example is willing to teach me his language, because he's proud of it and he's willing to help others to learn so that they share the joy. 🙂

Sorry, I guess I'll be like this until I get to the next level with my Virgo. 😢

"Sorry, I guess I'll be like this until I get to the next level with my Virgo."

Hasn't it been a year?

"We are not that close yet."

Will you still love me, will you still need me, when I'm sixty-four, lalalalala
Or, something like that.

Enjoy practicing? lol . . for what? My place in the retirement home?


Sorry, love4ever . . it's old, very, very old . . and, I know you want it to get better, but, the fact of the matter is . . this IS as good as it gets.

I hear that they're going to open up asylums in every state for us "waiters", so we can all dangle on the chandeliers, picking our noses . . give us something to do while we wait . . they're still thinking it over, they're not sure yet if they want to get to holding our hands . . that's a very serious step, it might suggest that they might be considering starting to think over, whether they have room in their brains to have time to ponder . .

lol

See what happens? This should serve as a warning . . the wait will drive a person to utter and complete M A D N E S S

Run, while you still have your sanity.

"and then you can move him around right left and center"

Yes, archer . . you've got it . . he has to be led.

Really, how great of a catch is a man who's self-esteem is so low, that a hand has to be kept on his back at all times to remind him that he is still good?

Man, or mouse . . that is the question. Women ask all these questions, don't they? But, do they ask the only question that really matters . . .

Is someone like that worth this much effort, just so I can spend the rest of my life showing him that I'm still here?

lol . . well, I guess if the woman doesn't feel woman enough to have a REAL man, then this would appear adequate.

"but I have no chance of contacting him out of blue and ask "Hey, what do you feel about me?"


See, you ladies are missing the whole picture, aren't you?

It is erronously assumed that he must be feeling something for you and you are compelled to ask how much? Just can't get an answer . . it's hard enough just finding silly little things to text, or email about . . but, you just got to know . . how does he feel about you . . lol

Let's look at humans, in general . . IF . . they feel something about another person, don't they say so? Don't you? I do . . doesn't everbody?

It's called communicating . . I tell you how I feel . . you tell me how you feel.

If a guy aint' telling you that he's feeling for you . . that means . . he's not.lol

*** Boing, boing, boing . . I keep pounding my head but I just don't get it. I think I need a harder wall, lol

Sometimes . . being a bitch is the only thing a woman has to hold onto.

I should know . . I've been pounding my own head against the wall for 24 goddamm years and guess what . . .


I AM STILL WAITING


Hellooooooooooo . . . my other voice keeps whispering in my other ear, the one of reason and logic . . but, here I sit . . I think I need a harder wall.

I have a hard time taking these things seriously, really . . is it obvious?

If I'm a loving a man . . I tell him.

If a man is loving me . . he tells me.

If he ain't telling . . he ain't feeling.


Frontal Labotemy, anybody?

You want to know, to quote you: "Hey, what do you feel about me?"

It's been a friggin year and he's not moving towards you . . what the hell do you think?

He's probably wondering if you're mentally challenged, at this point . . it's been a year and you're still asking . . .lol

I can't help but sit here and laugh my ass off . . he probably does, too, everytime you text him wanting to know how he feels about you.

lol

Ok, I'm done . . I'll be nice, or shut up . . one of the two . . and it won't take me a year, lol

He's still deciding what he feels for anything . . he's a Virgo, lol

notso, I'm just babbling because, I'm obviously completely mad.

Ok, notso, I'll answer seriously . . yes, he loves me and told me so the moment he realized it . . within 3 months of dating. That seems reasonable for a guy, and a tremendous step for a Virgo.

Men aren't women, they can't be expected to chatter about feelings. That's the way they work.

He loves me . . but, we were never "in love" with each other.

We had both gone through divorces from our first spouses and we saw in each other something we needed to make us happy. He's a wonderful person and has done everything he can to make my life happy . . but, that is to say . . with what the Virgo has to offer. Communication isn't one of those things . . they are handicapped in this area compared to other people. Thier love comes in different ways then the verbal whisperings in your ear of endearment.

He's typical for his kind when it comes to talking about feelings . . it's not happening as much as a woman would like . . a woman has to face this fact and a person, every person in life has to accept the other for who they are. I accept him for who he is . . I comprehend that he's NOT going to be all sappy with emotions.

After time . . people change . . now, I'm looking to get out of my marriage. He hasn't done anything wrong, he's a fantastic person . . things change, my desires have changed.

We have been together that long, I'm old.

I married him in 1982, twenty-four years ago.

I divorced my first husband in 1979.

He was a Gemini . . he looked just like Rupert Grint does now. I remember the first time I saw HP . . I nearly fainted . . spitting image.

We've adapted . . we actually get along wonderfully. We rarely argue, we have a tremendous amount of respect for each other, have a lot of the same interests.

In a perfect world, people would be together forever . . but, there's no such thing as forever . . the heart isn't set in stone . . it changes.

Now, we have grandchildren and that is something we enjoy together

Opaw and Nanna . . they're beautiful children and we love them dearly. Even when we finally get to the "over" part of our marriage . . I've no doubt that we will remain very good friends, spend time with the grandchildren together, celebrate holidays together . . we were friends first, before we got involved with each other. In fact, he was one of my very dear friends, so we have a good relationship.

Our problems, notso, involve intimacy . . Virgo's aren't real good in this department. One time, I remember Branh saying that it is in the Virgo nature to shrug off intimacy. When he said this, it hit home with me . . it's the Virgo nature, they don't like this kind of closeness with their partners and don't feel a need to give a woman the kind of intimate emotional support that a woman needs to feel whole.

For years, this was acceptable . . he is who he is and I accept him for that. I still accept that he is this way . . it's just NOW I am at a time in my life where I need more to feel like a woman. I'm not complete and the only person who can change this is me, for I can't expect another to change because they are them and I am me.

P-Angel, in all honesty my heart goes out to you and I hope that you can find all you need to feel whole.

So, since I won't even attempt to try and change him because I want him to be the person he is . . I'll leave and work on changing myself, work on finding what it takes to make me feel like a whole woman.

Pisces are experts at adapting, we can mold ourselves to fit any situation or be with any person . . and I've done this because I love him, very much . . but, now it's time for me . . if he can't change, then I won't expect it of him. If he wishes to try and change, I'll stay . . but, he's not attempting to adjust . . so, I'll move on.

I want him to be just exactly who he is . . I won't even ask him to change on my behalf, for that goes against my principals of letting a person live as they are.

Thanks, Wheels . . I didn't know you were listening. Normally, I don't talk about my problems . . I dont' why I am tonight. It helps to find myself, I guess.

"It helps to find myself, I guess."

It does. Sometimes you just need to talk (type) your way through it, and it can put things in perspective.

And it really has. In fact, I was talking just last week about my marriage and I let something slip out of my mouth (fingers) that had been brewing inside of me for a very long time . . I had never said it out loud . . then, when I read what I wrote, I was like, omg . . I want to die. I couldn't believe it, but, it's true . . or, it WAS true. It was like a ten-ton brick knocking me upside my head . . since then, I vowed to myself that I living is worth more to myself, to my family (my dogs).

So, it really does help to talk . . but, the thing is . . a person HAS to listen in order to make a change. It's not just about me talking . . I have to listen to what I'm saying, as well.

I want to live and I want to be happy.

Feeling good about divorce?

I've been thinking, two marriages, two divorces . . that makes me really screwed up. But, I can't feel bad about that. The first one, we were young . . I was 12 and just a kid, so what the hell did I know about adult relationships? The second one has lasted almost a quarter of a century . . certainly, that's not a failure.

For him, it will be devasting . . Virgo's don't handle failures very well. He'll take this hard and I have to be strong for him, be there for him, no matter what . . and I will. It's not like I'm gonna just walk-out on him . . I wont' treat him that way. It's going to be a slow process . . but, I have to do it because if I stay the way it is, then I've realized that I would rather die, and that's not healty to view my life that way for any of us.

Damn, I'm sitting here crying like a little baby. I don't like being weak, I guess you all know that by now, lol . . shit.

It just doesn't get any better with Virgo's . . love him, love them all, tremendously, but, a woman HAS to have intimate moments . . men think that it's a want.

It's not a want . . it's a NEED . . there's a difference. I have to have this to survive . . you know what i mean?

I know exactly what you mean. And I can picture myself in your situation, because I am a pro at blocking and supressing my emotions and rationalizing my way through things, and I don't always realize how much I need the intimacy. I can really sympathize with you. Of course I can only imagine what the reality is like, but I feel for you nonetheless.

"This makes me so sad. I am beginning to believe that maybe I won't ever be married."

notso, marriage is wonderful . . if I could go back in time, I'd do it all over again, eventhough, I know the outcome now. People just change, is all.

As much as I bitch in here, the truth is . . I love him more than I've ever loved anybody (except mother) and he has given me years of happiness . . I've just changed. What I need now is different than what I needed all through this time. It's not him, he is still the same man I've loved all this time. I still love him, always will.